In this solo podcast episode, host Sally Koering Zimney shares a personal story about receiving 23andMe results that indicate a genetic predisposition to fear of public speaking, both for herself and for several speaker friends who sent her their results. She reflects on how fear is a universal experience for anyone who takes on larger speaking opportunities, describing a progression from early, smaller presentations to TEDx talks and keynote stages. Sally introduces a conceptual framework that distinguishes "shrinking fear"—the type of fear that holds us back—from "growing fear," which pushes us toward risk, learning, and personal expansion. She argues that fear, including genetically‑influenced fear, should be seen as a companion that signals growth rather than a barrier, urging listeners to embrace it and pursue bigger stages. Throughout, she uses motivational, conversational language, peppered with humor (peanut butter analogies) and personal anecdotes, and ends with an enthusiastic update about upcoming podcast content and her own excitement for future projects.
Chapters
Well, hello, movers! It is Sally here, and it's been a while since you have heard my voice. I know, I know. What can I tell you? I have been doing some big things outside of this little podcast world. But can I tell you something? I have missed it so much, so much. In fact, the other day I had like a dream about it. I was like, "Oh, I miss podcasting." It's so fun, and it does feel like I'm having a conversation with you. So I've missed you. I've missed you. I hope everything is going well with you, and I am super excited to just bring you what is kind of like a little mini Moved Me. Because here's what happened. I just was inspired because I got an email from a friend of mine who's a speaker, and I've coached him a little bit in the past, and he got an email from 23andMe. Maybe you got the same email. And it was letting him know that he, along with millions of others, are predisposed to a fear of public speaking. And he was like, what do you think of this, Sally?" I was like, "What? What is this?" I did a little research trying to figure out what is this all about, and in the meantime, like, 2 or 3 other people took a picture of their results and sent it to me, and they're like, "What do you think? What do you think of this?" And what was funny is that they were all speakers in some way, and some people were and some people were not predisposed to a fear of public speaking. And of course, when they asked, "What do you think of this?" I was like, "Oh, I think some things. I've got a lot of opinions about this." Because I'm really passionate about this idea. Because I think the idea of public speaking, like with a capital S, keeps some people off the, what I'm going to call, the bigger stages. In their lives, which is such a waste of your message, your mission, your purpose. And everyone I have ever worked with, ever, the whole way along in the last 20 years, high school kids, phenomenal, already really successful motivational speakers, entrepreneurs, authors, CEOs, Harvard-educated leaders who have no reason, as far as any of the rest of us can tell, for being afraid of the moment, for questioning their own belonging up on stage, quote unquote. So what I have found is that it does not discriminate. And I think everybody, before they're about to do something big, before they're about to do something that stretches them experiences fear. Maybe it starts for some people with that long ago, right? Think back to that first big meeting you were having, that first big one-on-one, that first board meeting. But after you feel comfortable in that zone, then they feel a pull towards something better. Maybe it's a workshop, or then maybe after that it's like, "Ooh, I really want to get on that TEDx stage. And maybe if you've done that, now it's like, gimme that keynote conference. No, maybe it's, let me keynote that conference. I am ready for the big stage. Right? After you've mastered that, now it's, it's about speaking more for more money on the bigger stages with the big names. But along the entire journey, if you are continuing to push yourself fear should be your constant companion. And I use should kind of carefully. I don't like that word. But when I gave my TEDx talk last fall, I was afraid. I was nervous, right? And I'm a speaking coach and I love the stage. I love speaking. But of course I felt nervous because I cared A lot. A lot. But this is how it works. Everyone has fear. Everyone. And if you don't, it's just that you're not taking big enough risks. Fear and public speaking go hand in hand, like peanut butter and chocolate, peanut butter and jelly, or peanut butter and— what else? Apples, apples, so many good things go with peanut butter. Mmm, I love it. Truly, some of the best talks I've ever experienced had a visceral impact on me because it felt risky and real in a way that only accessing our fear can really push us towards. So if you haven't been accessing your fear, it's not that you're simply one of the lucky few that isn't genetically disposed to fearing public speaking. It might just mean you are ready for something bigger and you need to push yourself. And if you are one of those genetically predisposed people to fearing public speaking, guess what? I think that that is an unhelpful distinction. You might— there's some science behind this, I don't doubt that— but you, you might have some stronger feelings of fear. You might access those feelings more easily, but it does not exclude you from sharing who you are and your essential message for this world. Please believe me on this. And in fact, it might mean that it is more important than ever for people to hear your voice and your story. Like peanut butter and bananas. Mmm. So actually, I think a helpful reframe around fear because we all have it to different levels and sometimes some days more than others. But I think it's helpful to think of fear in two ways. That there, there is some fear that is guiding you away from something that is dangerous and bad and not good for you, right? I call that shrinking fear. That is fear that essentially shrinks us in the end. We become a smaller version of ourselves when we get to the other side, the other side of that experience. That is a shrinking fear, and there is something internal that is saying, "Get away, bad news, fear, fear, fear, go the other way," right? That's like danger zone. Now our brains and our bodies, the adrenaline response sometimes cannot distinguish between what is essentially shrinking fear, danger fear, and this other kind of fear that I call growing fear, fear that means that you are taking a big risk, that you are stepping into something bigger. It is scary, but it is good for you. You are growing, you are learning, you are becoming a bigger, better version of yourself, that sense of growth. And that is also fear. Fear walks with us in that too, but our brain can't distinguish those. Our very old primal part of our brain that runs adrenaline cannot distinguish. And so we have to step back and say for ourselves, what kind of fear is this? And I think speaking is growing fear. Speaking is absolutely about that moment where you are stepping into something bigger and pushing yourself in a big way, and it's scary and it's good. So who cares if 23andMe says that you're more inclined to be afraid of public speaking? Bring it on, 23andMe. Bring it on. There is something more for you. Get out there. Bigger stage, bigger message, bigger impact. Let's do it. Yeah, I love it. Do not let that email take you off course, my friends. Movers, let's keep moving. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Let's be moved, hmm? Love it. All right, hopefully it won't be several months before you hear from me again. I've got a whole bunch of stuff in the can, actually. And that means it's ready. It's been recorded. It needs to be produced. It's coming. It's coming. I'm super excited. There's some really fun things coming down the pipeline. Huge stuff, like mind-blowing. I'm super jazzed about it and also kind of freaking out. And I've always got big plans, and what feels different about this is that it's happening. Big dreamer, and that's— I'm doing it. Are you ready? I'm so— I'm not ready, actually. I couldn't even say it, but I'm getting there. I'm getting there, and I'm really honored that you are walking with me on the journey. Bargain! That's it, my friends. Movers! See you next time.
