Expert Panel: Navigating Burnout and Embracing Change with Energy and Empowerment

I do really believe 100% from every part of me that everyone has the capacity to be able to do the things that they want and not to be held back by the mental baggage that's in our head that we want to push through.

Welcome to the do the Thing podcast. In each episode, we get down and personal with people who go after the things they want to make all their wildest dreams come true. Join us as we unveil and dissect a formula for what it takes to do the thing. Here is your host, Stacy Lauren.

Hey, everyone. Okay, so you are here because we are having an expert panel with amazing experts that are joining me, and we're going to be talking about really what happens when you are experiencing any kind of movement towards success and your goals and what can happen to you inside as you're doing that. And sometimes the burnout, the exhaustion, the energy drain, and all of the things that can come from doing something new, scary, or even just extraordinary, something that you really want for your life. And I am so excited. I specifically curated this group of experts based on what was being called to me. And I'm going to introduce each one of them and really just give them the time and the space as I'm introducing them, because I think when you're doing things like this, there's this really cool thing that happens where you realize everybody that you meet in your life is part of this plan that you didn't even know you were living in. And I feel like each person that's here joining me today is really part of that. First, I'm going to just do a technical thing. I want to make sure everyone that wants to see this can see this. And then I'm going to introduce them as well. So first, I haven't done this before. This is actually going to be fun. I'm going to bring on each of you individually and just talk about you. And so this was actually inspired from a masterclass that's coming up with Jamie Smith, who's the founder of Lux Every Day. And we were talking about what happens when you are. Actually, her masterclass is called. I'll just say it. It's called Hot Mess to Hot Success. And when she was talking about what she was doing with this masterclass, it really screamed at me from everything that I've gone through as I was owning my business and the 20 years that I did that, and I ended up getting completely sucked dry with all of the expectations that I thought people needed to have for me and all the things I needed to be and really just became a shell of who I was. And it's so important when you're able to be in a space with people that are able to really help you get out of that. And so that's what Jamie really does. And I'm going to bring her on and I don't know if she's got her video.

We'll see.

We're experimenting with restream for the first time, so. Hi, Jamie.

Hi. No, I, you know, it's gotta love tech. This is like. But yeah, I'm in here. You just can't see my face. I'll still keep playing with it to see if I can get it figured out, but it will not let me show my camera. So.

You know what? I love this. So Jamie has a community of people where even one time the electric went out in your house. Yeah, electricity went out and you still came back on and you were like, oh, whatever, it's fine. And I'm like, oh, my gosh. You're literally living your brand of being a adapt and be flexible with what these things are. So thank you.

No, I promise. I even did my hair today for you all and now I can't even see you.

So I'm just introducing, basically telling everybody that you're really the thing that inspired this whole expert panel where we were talking about your masterclass hot mess to success and then decided to just be able to have conversations with other people that are experts in this area and being able to just talk about it because it's so important, right, to be able to bring it up in this way.

No, I agree. And Stacy, I love that it started as a whole nother idea and that's what I want everybody to hear right now. It started as a whole different idea, and yet it transformed into this extraordinary conversation with all of these incredible experts. And from that, this conversation is going to even go to a higher level than it was even expected to go originally. And so if you're in this stream today and if you're watching or watching the replay, just know, like, you're a part of it and you're a part of the energy and you're here on purpose. And we're so excited to have you available here so that we can talk about all the things, right? Not just the things that we feel are okay to talk about, but all the real things. The reality of what it's like to go to the next level, the reality of how stressful it is when the economy goes down, how stressful it can be when something doesn't go our way or we have uncertainty in our life, but it applies to every single area. You could be going to a whole nother level, and that means you need a whole nother level of boundaries and conversations and support. But you also, maybe you're just stuck right now. And if you're feeling stuck, maybe you're like, I need support there. How do I get out of that? And so we get to have those conversations today because all of it, all of it can lead to burnout, overwhelm, and that's why we're having this whole conversation.

Well, thank you so much. I love it. And so Jamie is an elevation strategist and really has so much experience with bringing women together and creating spaces and helping them manage their energy levels and really ignite their soul. And there's so much in that we'll get to explore. So I'm going to bring on the rest of our experts, and then I'm going to introduce each of you that way. So let's say hi, everybody. It's just so excited. I feel like it's like the secret that I'm leaving. Okay, so. All right, you guys. So this is fun. So Karen Samuelson is here. And so I brought your book with me. So I had her book 10 years ago, and I've been talking about this a lot in this program that I'm doing right now of connecting the dots backwards and all the people that have helped you. And this book helped me from a lot of different ways. And I never imagined I would be in your mastermind now and we'd be on this expert panel. And it's just so cool to be able to bring people that are part of your life and your transformation. And Karen's done like best selling author, helps people write books. Mads has a business mastermind where she helps with branding and SEO and all of this incredibleness. I think you're even a columnist for Oprah. Incredible. Yeah. And so we're bringing Karen on because of the way that she's able to speak to people from both the people that are really attracted to this kind of message, which is high achieving entrepreneurs and being able to speak to that level. So, yeah. So welcome Karen.

Great to be here.

Yay.

So excited. And then, Sarah Moses, we had a moment and sorry, I've got to just share because I feel like each of you have been part of this whole journey of my hot mess to success, I guess. And it's actually now that I'm thinking about it, that is kind of what it is. Sarah, we were doing this program together, which is how I learned what I'm doing now. And she was the first one that spoke in this group and basically said, hey, guys, I'm scared. Is anyone scared too? And that was the moment that I'm like, okay, I guess I'm in the right place, because I didn't know that I was okay to be scared. And since then, you started your podcast, Do it now, and you already are a speaker all over doing incredible stuff. And so the way that you touch people with your words and you're always tapping into your own energy and who you are at the core, it's just really, really beautiful.

Thank you so much. I want to say I'm so honored to be here with the panel that looks like this and Jamie being hidden as a surprise.

That's why y' all have to be.

Sticking with Jamie because she just sparkles when she smiles, she drops. So much wisdom. I certainly have. I had the honor of interviewing her on my podcast, and it was one.

Of those times where you just say.

This is a woman who wants to help everybody, but especially women. She just empowers us, she supports us. So I'm excited to be here. I'm going to let you move on, but I'm so excited.

Thank you, Sarah. That means the world to me. We had such a fun conversation. You have such an extraordinary podcast. Yeah. You just have such a heart for women. So thank you.

Thank you.

And then Luis, who Luis Aguilar, who's founder of New Dynamo U. And he has a bustling community of people that are ravaging to hear his insights on things from fitness to energy to emotions, to everything that comes along with just living day to day and really started to get even more passionate about longevity and all of the things there. And so he's been just having really incredible conversations with people around these topics and actually is now even starting something new with sustainability. And so you're constantly tapped in. And the reason why I felt really inspired to bring Luis on was for all of those reasons. But when we met, he came from this burnt out 9 to 5 workplace, and the brand he was creating was really for that person to help them. And so I know you've lived this life, you know, this life, and you're able to speak to it too.

Yeah. Thank you. I just find that it's really incredible and I think doesn't matter what stage in life you are, but that transformation, being able to kind of reach your self realization. Because as a new entrepreneur, I don't have all of these skills, I'm constantly learning different things, but realizing that what I learned, my own self value and worth and being able to actually either service or a product or just to create a community where people can actually feel that connection and get something out of it is definitely important because I think, think we're all here to kind of support one another. Just in terms of the types of messaging. For example, I'm focusing right now on fitness and there's a lot that can be spoken through that. And as Stacy mentioned, I mean, there's mental health, emotional health, even wanting to realize yourself and saying, well, I'm really doing this for myself because I value myself. I invest in myself every time I do some form of exercise. And that doesn't just stick with me, but for my family, for my friends, for my ideals. And it really has a big breath that is attached to that. So just the whole learning curve of being able to find your message and create an online community is a continuous learning curve in terms of not only being able to share and provide value for people, but for myself because I'm constantly finding my voice and activating and empowering. So I get to share that with people. And I think it's scary, but just being able to do that out in the open really is like a quick immersion, fast way to growth. So, yeah, super happy to share this space with everyone here.

Yeah, I'm so glad you said that because a lot of times people think it's just easy to do certain things, but it's constantly stretching yourself. Right. And expanding yourself to what's new. And so next we have Vicki Poole, who has the community make lasting change. And then she's also the founder of the Enlightened Peach and she's a master of habit change. She also does hypnosis and is a life transformational coach. And it was funny. I originally started working with her when I was going through this yo yo weight thing back in the holidays. And what I realized through the hypnosis part of it was it was I was lonely during the holidays and I was feeling really disconnected and it had nothing to do with what I was eating, but that I just needed some nourishment and connection. And then since then, I know some of you guys know, but I had applied for a TEDx talk and I was auditioning and then she even did hypnosis for me on that for speaking, which was really cool and just sort of changed my life in that way. And so the reason why she's here is just she speaks from the lens of being able to really help people create, make lasting change. But she really gets underneath the layers of what that change is, which is great. So, Vicki, excited to have you here.

Well, thank you so much. And I'm so excited to hear what everybody has to say. I've been an entrepreneur for a very, very long time, so I'm not new to entrepreneurship, so that also means I'm not new to the stress and the burnout and everything. So it happens at every level of entrepreneurship, not just when you first start, but that's the beauty of it, too, because I've just recently started doing these different pivots for different ideas and different things that I think people are wanting and needing. And this scared the hell out of me. And so it's like constantly getting in front of people and a community of people that help you to realize that no matter where you are in the growth process, that it can be scary. But if you've got community of people that are supportive and helping you to not only be where you are, but to push you out of that comfort zone, that it's just a glorious place to live.

And.

And so that's what I feel about all you guys, because without you, I don't know whether I would be striving to do those different things that are really scary. And so that is a beautiful place to be. And I just want to say thank you for that and for having me here.

Yeah. And Melissa says, hi, Karen, and in the comments, and then Vicki Nevins is here. So, hey, you guys, feel free to comment if you have any questions about this topic that you want us to talk about. But, Jamie, I'd love to start with you and what inspired this masterclass, and then we could kind of create the conversation around that to success. I think as soon as people hear it. And then immediately there's a comment saying, yeah, like a great name. Right? And so I think so many people have felt like a hot mess on the inside, and so just love to hear what kind of spurned this, and then we'll be able to all share our feedback on that.

Yeah, absolutely. So what I was realizing is, I think so many times people feel like they can't admit that they're a hot mess. They may look like a hot success on the outside, but on the inside, they may be a hot mess. And I know this because I lived it back in 2011. I was living my dream, and I was traveling the world and being sponsored by major brands and coming up with the latest and greatest for fitness trends. And yet inside, what was going on is I was going through a divorce and my entire world had just gotten leveled to ground zero. Everything that I knew to be stable and to actually help me feel like who I was was demolished. And so because of that, I started being a hot mess. I was a hot mess in every area except on the outside. But reality wise, we know that even if one area is a hot mess or a little messy, a little chaotic, right? It affects all the other areas. And because of this, I guess we live in this grind culture that I want to bring up. Because it's not your fault is what I want you to know. It's not your fault because what we think and what we hear is constantly this grind culture. You just do more, you just work harder, right? Do more affirmations, all of these things. And not that those can't help. However, if you have some wounds on the inside, it's going to affect, affect everything on the outside. You will continue to go circle back around into self sabotaging behaviors. You will keep relearning the lessons that you've never actually applied and learned. And so they just keep coming back around. So what happens is you actually magnetize the exact opposite of what you desire in your life, in your business. And that's exactly what I was doing. I was living this dream, this passion filled, exactly what I wanted to be doing, doing and creating all of these amazing things. But yet on the inside I was wounded, I was not healed. And I didn't understand that these new opportunities and these extraordinary experiences I was having, it required an upgraded healed version of me to be able to operate in that level. Right. And so we're. If we're trying to operate at a higher level than we're actually healed at, or that we actually can do internally, we'll continue to get pulled down into the hot mess. It will just continue to cycle back around. And that was my heart in sharing it. Because I don't care where you're at in life, if you want to go the next level or maybe you're just completely feeling like total hot mess if we just address those things first and then you can focus and then you can work hard and you can do it alongside of it. But otherwise you're just going to get burned down and going circles and you're not going to really be magnetizing and drawing in the things that you truly, truly desire. So that's how I came up with hot mess to hot success. Because I want to give the secrets of how you can increase your Capacity to go to the next level. Right. Because before we go through that system, it's the system that I learned I'm going to be sharing with everybody that joins the Hot Mess to Hot Success. Masterclass is. It's really my system that I learned to get out of my Hot mess, but it's also the system. So if you're in the middle of it, it will help you, but if you're going to another level, you need a whole nother level of success mindsets and success strategies to go there.

Pamela said, excellent point. And Fern said, that makes so much sense. And Jackie from London, she said, hi, peeps. This is Fire Sauce. So I'd love to hear from you guys. So when you're hearing Jamie talk about that, what is coming alive for you? Sarah, do you want to start?

Yeah. What's coming alive for me is, man, I wish I had known Jamie when I was going through some really challenging times and I absolutely felt like a hot mess. I think in almost every area of my life, I think sometimes we go through things like that and then we come out of them and then it's going to be a new us. But we haven't done it before. And so we need a guide or a mentor or someone who's done it before us to lead the way. Because if we don't reach out to someone, then I feel like we're just going to spend years recreating the wheel. So I love this idea that Jamie has sort of brought together best practices and tools and tips to help people who maybe are coming out of something and they know they want to make changes in their life and they want to do things differently to get a different result, to get to the next level, but they need some guidance. So I don't know if that resonates for anyone else or.

Yeah, it just makes me remember that when you're going through this journey, right. Of wanting to achieve something big or just even waking up from divorce and having something like that happen, you go through this quest of information seeking, Right. Where you're looking for all these things.

Right.

And it's actually kind of funny, when I was introducing each of you, you were each a part of even just my current situation as I'm reaching for this new thing and kind of being able to do it. And so I think it's really important to know there's so many resources out there to be able to help you get through it. Where I think a lot of people sometimes want to stay there and not realize that there's Just so much access. So, speaking of that, Karen, I'd love to hear from you. What's coming along for you and what do you want to share?

Oh, my God. I have 20 million different things I.

Want to say, and I'm just trying to figure it out.

I wrote a book. I turned my pain into purpose because I went through a lot of crummy things all at the same time. And my father passed. I had sexual assault, high level. And that's why I wrote the Bounce Back book. And so in the Bounce Back book, I talk a lot about how to move forward. Yes, I know, right. Which was also recommended on Oprah's site. And I became a Bounce Back columnist for Psychology magazine when they saw the book. So it was very helpful. So to write out what I was feeling and to think about. I'm a research geek, so some of the things that I did with it was, well, I say when you're stressed, if you ask depressing questions, you get depressing answers. So, for example, if you're like, why me? Why didn't I instead stop it and swap it for questions that lift you up, like, what can I learn from this? What's something good that can come from this? And in fact, if you have negative thoughts, it's much harder to just stop them. You need to do what I call a stop and swap. The same way I have a dog. And if my dog is chewing my slippers, my dog is actually right here, right? And this little dot.

Or if I want to get him.

To stop chewing my slippers, if I just take away the slipper, he'll find it again. So I have to retrain him and do a stage stop and swap. And your thoughts are like that. If you're obsessing over something that's very negative, it's not enough to stop it. You have to swap it with, like, a more positive thought. So one of the ones that I used during this time was just the single word forward. And if I was thinking about, like, why from the past, I would just think to myself, forward. And then I would think of one action step that I could do to move myself forward. And one simple word, forward, forward. And then it kind of just reminds you. And then also I think writing about it. And at one point, I was going to write a memoir about everything that I'd gone through. And I came up with these words for the title. The gift, the bridge, the assignment. Right.

Yeah.

I never wrote the memoir, but when I started to think of it that way, and because I didn't have a happy ending yet. And I knew if I'm writing a memoir, this has to go in a happy direction. So then I started to think of my story as leading me to a happier direction, as the assignment, as the gift, as the bridge. Since then, I've just given that to my clients and other people to rename it the gift, the assignment, the Bridge, and think about and get curious about. Well, where is this leading me again, the word forward and to focus forward with it. So that's just. I could go on and on, but I want to give that some of the. The beginning percolations of thoughts that are coming to mind.

Yeah. I think it's so important because so many times, especially when you're getting stuck in the thought or you're stuck in the. The swirl, the tornado in the brain, and just to know that there's a fall word and then there's the one simple thing that can just kind of move you out of that. I feel like there's so much power in that, Vicki. That reminds me of kind of what we've been working on with the right turn, left turn and all that. I'd love to hear maybe just what your thoughts are right now and what's coming alive for you.

Yeah, I mean, that's beautiful. And I'm going to have to get your book, Karen. So I wrote it down so I.

Can get the book and read that.

But yeah, it is.

For one thing.

It is. I've been really working on this recently, and it's something that's been top of mind with some of the stuff that I'm going through. It's that as I go into that spiral down the rabbit hole of things that aren't right or have not been doing, what you want them to do is stopping myself in the moment and saying left turn. So I'm taking a. A turn to get away from those thoughts and moving toward the better thoughts. And so I feel like our thoughts. It's almost like if you're not doing that, you're on a ship in the ocean. You have no sail, no engine, no oars, no anything. And the thoughts are just throwing you all over the place. And so it's getting tools and things that you can use as an or so. Something that's small and simple. Right. But you could go all the way up to having an engine or being pulled by a huge ship. So there's finding guidance. And so that's what Jamie is doing with her workshop, is giving guidance to people who need that particular thing right then and so she's either putting the engine on your boat, or she's got a rope tied to you and a chain tied to you, and she's pulling you across the ocean to where your destination is. So that's kind of how I'm feeling with all the stuff that's being talked about right now.

Yeah. And it reminds me, too, right now, in your group, you're doing the miracle.

Right.

Where we're all looking for miracles out there, which it's like, once you get your mind to open to being able to see what's possible, I think that's what it's all about. Right. And being around people that are doing that.

Yeah.

And one of the things that we're doing with miracles in the group as well is that when something comes up that seems like an obstacle, instead you start looking at what's the miracle lesson that's coming from it. Because everything's there to move us to a different location. Maybe it's to give us a different mindset, get us away from certain things. Whatever it is, it's there for a purpose. And a lot of times we kind of want to put it in the back burner. We want to not think about it. We want to kind of dig a hole and bury it. But if you can look at it as there's something that is very powerful that comes from that, if you're open to it. And so to me, there are miracles all the time that can be found and the obstacles that show up.

Yeah. When you say that with the. If you're open to it, that reminds me of the clearer that we are in our minds, the more that we're able to write about the stuff. Or my technique is to use your phone and record it just to get it out of your head. Then you're able to see that stuff easier. Otherwise, it's really hard to see that stuff because you're too consumed in your head. I've done that before. I've been so busy, and I'm walking my dog, my head's down. I'm missing the most beautiful sunset. And I'm like, what am I doing? And I feel like that we get those signs all the time, but we might not see it because we're too consumed. I'm sure. Luis, you have some things coming up for you with that.

Yeah. You guys have really interesting perspectives. I really agree with a lot of that's being said. I think, being able. I mean, just from my own experience, I studied. I was really doing a lot of research, and I was just Always in that space of exploration, investigation, different ideas. And then I went to the 9 to 5 and realized that everything that I had loved before in terms of science was kind of stripped away, which is why I love being in this kind of a space, because now we're able to really explore different ideas and learn from one another. And one of the things that has really helped me personally, which is what Karen mentioned, I just used it as the kind of a substitution mindset in terms of, well, first I had to reconstruct and simplify everything that I had learned and really go back to the basics. And then any kind of limiting thought that I had was to replace it with something that helped me move forward. And I think that has absolutely helped me. And being in this space with all of you, just kind of reaffirming all of these thoughts and really being able to find a community out coach. And being in that space that helps you reminds you to keep going in the direction after having kind of gone through that hot mess that Jamie has said, because I really relate to that in terms of knowing one thing, but then knowing that you have a higher potential and then remaining in that space and in going forward. So I think that it's super interesting. And I. I think being able to kind of maintain that space and that kind of perspective really kind of catapults you to keep moving forward. So I really like what everyone's saying. It's fantastic.

And Norma's here. Hey, Norma. Norma said, that's a great question. Lesson. And then Fern said the different levels of healing required to reach new heights. That is so true, Fern. Oh, my God. That's really true. I say that all the time. As soon as you go to another level, all these new things come up and you're like, I thought I already dealt with you. Why are you coming back again? So I think where I want to go with this now is Jeannie really kind of set this up with that hot mess thing and how everything looked good on the outside, but a mess inside. Why is there so much shame around saying that? I feel like so many people. So it's hard, right? Because you have to be open, vulnerable, think about what people are going to think or say or really just know who you are to be able to just kind of admit it. Because self awareness is really the first step, right? Be able to acknowledge that something's going on and you want to change it, and then connecting to other people that are able to do it, too. So, Jamie, I'd love to hear maybe kind of just what your thoughts are on that and then helping people move from that.

Yeah, for sure. Because I do feel like there is so much shame, blame, guilt that we're afraid to talk about, right? And then on top of that, we're afraid of judgment and fear of failure and not being enough and being too much. It's like it never stops, right? And I remember back in 2020, I was actually at a. No, it wasn't even that. It was 2022, so it was more recent. I was at an event, a women's event, and I could feel. And I don't know if any of you have felt this before, but you know when you feel that calling, like, you know something's coming and you're like, oh. Or you're just like, you can feel it and you already have resistance for it. Well, that's where I was and I went to this event and the woman that was leading the event was calling us forth and she's like, what is your next level? And I already knew it was uncomfortable, so I was like, you know, the big sigh. And then I stood up and I had to physically make myself step forward and proclaim, I am done sliding under the radar. I am done playing small. And this was at 50 years old. It's not like I'm. I know you all think I'm young because I'm not on camera, but the time, and it took me that long to really claim and decide that I was no longer going to be held back by the shame, by the blame, by the guilt, by the being judged. Because I know so many of us have stories like this, but there's experiences in our life that were life changing and life altering that made us understand that we could go only so high and then we might be attacked and then we might be judged.

Right?

And so it teaches us, it trains us to. Then we can still be achievers. I'm not saying all of us are still achievers. And you can still be a really high level achiever. And yet you've learned the ability to still slide just under the radar so you don't get called out too much, so you don't make too much of a wave, right? So that too many people don't disagree with you. And I've learned over the last couple of years that this is one of my passions, is to call women forth. And of course men as well, but to call them forth and be like, you know what, let's just be done with that. Can we just be done with that and have the real conversations? Can we just be done with that and be honest where we are and accept one another in the mess, but also call one another up to the success. Can we just do real life and have real conversations together for a change? And can we choose? And this is one of the most important things that I would suggest is when you're choosing to go to this next level, when you're choosing to do this, you are going to have people that are going to fall off. You are going to have people that you're going to upset. You are going to have people that are used to you playing small and used to you being a people pleaser and used to you doing the things that they want you to do. So you will upset people. And if you find a new community like Stacy's, right, I know that Vicki has a community and Karen does and Sarah has a such beautiful community following. And Luis, if you find a community that will support that higher level of your vision, will support it being okay to mess up. Because we already know that as you fail, you actually learn so much more. You go faster as you fail more. I'm just going to tell you, I know that's not the perception we have as perfectionists, as high achievers, but the more you fail, the faster you grow. As long as you learn the lessons and as long as you surround yourself with people that are here in the chat, people that are here on this panel, find communities that you can actually be the boldest, most beautiful, most extravagant version of you that God created you to. Because you are not created to just play small. I'm just telling you, you're not.

It's so true. And I was doing this. I mean, I was the CEO of this big company, 60 employees, 20 years, and I was hidden. Anything I would do was only around my employees. I couldn't go outside of that bubble. Wasn't until I left that identity that then I started to expand. And I love everything that you're saying because I think it's so easy to fall into that trap of being invisible, right? Not wanting to be seen. That's why I'm so obsessed with some of the stuff I'm doing. But, Sarah, I'm sure a lot's coming up for you.

Yeah, it really is. Because I truly believe, and I talk a lot about the fact that when we can be authentic, and I call it being naked with our clothes on, just really honest about what's going on, it's the reason you and I connected was because I finally got to a place in my life where I had had so much tragedy and trauma and loss and grief that when I finally got up off the ground and I was going to step forward into this new life and do things differently so I could have a different life, I said, I have to stop worrying what other people think, and I have to stop making decisions out of fear. And so as I stepped forward now, I can still care about people, but I don't have to care about what they think about me. There's a difference. Right? And as I started to do that, I started to see that the fear I had was unfounded. Because now people, the right people, my people, were coming towards me, and I was connecting with them the same way that I connected with you, by being honest, authentic, and saying, I haven't gotten this figured out. I feel afraid. Does anyone else feel afraid? And seeing if someone wanted to have a dialogue about it. Right. Which is why I love that Jamie's encouraging everybody to have discussions and dialogues around the subject. Because I think as entrepreneurs, we are isolated a lot. We work alone a lot, and we're not meant to do this. We're supposed to be in community and have connection. So I think it's exciting, Stacy, that you've helped so many of us create a community because that's where we can grow together. We're better together. Those two words have been coming up a lot for me lately. If people can put that in the chat. Better together. Community, connection, better together.

That's what I'm saying.

Gonna say for today.

I think we have a new tagline for do it now together. This is really. I mean, this was so good. As Fern just said, women are taught we are not lovable if we outshine the men around us. Really powerful. Okay, Karen, I would love to hear what's coming up for you right now. Sorry, my questions are more insightful, but I just feel like there's so much happening that I could just.

I relate to this. I mean, I grew up in a time where I felt embarrassed when I was a kid in school if I did better than some of the guys that I had crushes on. Yeah. And I still remember this. I remember there was a guy, Steve, whose last name I forget, though, and I liked him, and I was really good at math, and he wanted to be good at math, so I purposefully started to do bad in math so he would like me. And sometimes I think I love the books that I do, and I've loved doing them, but I also decorate them, design them. I designed them because I felt like people felt embarrassed. I'm going to go back and then I'm going to go forward. So I started doing the books that I was doing because I was a geek and I just love to read psychology books and I would read them, I'd pull off the covers because I was embarrassed be seen from Sarah was saying as somebody who liked to read these books so I'd rip off the covers and or even I'd put another cover in front of it and God forbid anybody would know I was reading a self help book. I wanted to share them with friends and I felt like I wish there was a book you could give to a friend and they're not going to punch you because it's like you need this book. So the marketing chick in me was like there should be self help for people. This is back because I'm 63 so this was so many years ago. There should be self help for people who wouldn't be caught dead doing self help or self help for people that you give the book to somebody as a gift, they're not going to punch you. So I purposely took what I was doing and I made it fun and playful and colorful and cute. But recently, now that I'm my age now I started thinking, oh my gosh, I do love to read. I'm hiding that my books are so cute. It was almost like a big epiphany that you can't tell from my books because they're like the way I tried to be around Steve in the math class, you know, like oh, I'm not so they're cute. And so that's what triggered me now in my 60s to write a text dense book. And I'm not going to get into it because then we'll go off subject but it's relevant here now because it's about I call it behind the scenes. I call it my coming out of the closet as a smart person book because I wanted the other books to be like really cute and this and now I'm just ready, I'm ready to just do a book that's a book without all the cutesy. So that comes up for me and also what comes up for me is in my branding course and my, my mastermind I talk a lot about that. Your power is what I call being you ear so and like you er a lot of life about I mean that's your power with your brand. The more you are you and vulnerable is you just showing up. People can feel that and they're attracted to it. But not just in brands in life. I mean the more you wear you or your clothes, be your you self, have your you ear sense of humor and you get your you or your ways. And the youier you are, the happier you'll be. And also because we're all our different versions of you, we are, we don't have to worry about competing. Which is what I, I love in women supporting women and women supporting men. Men. I mean, I don't want to say that Luis is here, but I tend to have a base group. But it's that I call it and I used it yesterday when I was talking to Jamie and Stacy. Co op petition instead of competition. Yeah.

So good.

If we all like I'm different so I can support Jamie and Sarah and Louise and Vicki and Stacy, even if we were selling kind of the same thing, because different version with different tools with different insights and people could benefit differently from each of us. And so I think that we need to embrace whatever makes us you here and not be ashamed of it and to embrace it more often. You do that, the more you'll pull in the right people and you'll just be much freaking happier.

So yeah, it's so true. Because when you're tapping into you being you ear, then that person that is wanting to have that moment where they're hearing your whatever you're saying, they're like, that's me. I want whatever you have. And for a lot of people that are here, you guys are starting podcasts, you're starting books, you're starting a brand and knowing that then you don't have to be exhausted pretending to be someone else either, or wondering what people are going to say or what they're going to think. Because you get to just be yourself and it's like you either like it or you don't like it. And like Sarah said, you could still have the love for them but be okay with them not coming in for you. We're getting some really incredible comments. I just wanted to share. Fern said, I was made to feel like being smart was a negative. And I feel like we're showing right now what happens when you're able to share the story and then someone else is able to reflect. That happened to me. Right. And that's where I think it's going back to that self awareness. When you're able to bring it out, that's when you can really start making the changes. And then Melissa said, me too. We need new work friends. And also said, this is so true. I try not to shine because I make others uncomfortable. Oh my gosh. It's so, so good.

Can I. Can I address that really quickly? And then I so want to hear what Luis and Vicki have to say, because I'm not quite sure who said that, because I can't see Stace, but I wanted just to say to that person that just said, try not to shine too much. That was me. I'm just telling you. I never wanted somebody else to feel less than then. I didn't want to make them feel uncomfortable or like they weren't doing as great of a job. And I felt guilt. I don't know if anybody else here felt okay.

Yeah.

Sarah's like, yeah, me too. And in the chat, too, if you ever felt that way, I want to address that because it's so crucial. Let's reframe our thinking, because here's the reality. You were created for greatness, the God of the universe, or however you connect with the source. I'm a Jesus girl, but he created you to be amazing. And it's like if you're a little child and you give your child this gorgeous gift and you put so much effort into it, and you knew they would love it so much because it would tap into everything they loved, and you gave it to them for Christmas, and they open it up and they peek inside, and then they shut it and put in their closet because they're afraid that it'll get broken. They're afraid somebody else will feel bad because they don't have one. They're afraid.

Right.

And so it's a responsibility to share the ultimate essence of who you are. Not only that, I want to challenge your thinking and ask, do you think you're doing them any service by playing small? Because as you play small, it gives them permission to play small, whereas when you rise, it gives them permission to rise. And if they're not ready to rise, then that's their journey, and that's what they need to process through, but it shouldn't be. And Sarah and I had this beautiful conversation on her podcast, because what I realized is, you know how wounded people wound people. Free women. Free women. So as you get more free, as you rise, you give other women and men permission to do the same thing. So really reframe that thought, because it held me back for so long. It really did. And when we learn that that's not how we were intended or created to move forward in this life, and it's not how we were intended to lead, that's not doing anybody any good. So, anyway, I would love to hear from Luis and Vicki, but that just struck a chord in me because I have been there.

Yeah. And then we just got a comment. That's amazing, Jamie. Love that visual. This is the best self help group shared experience. And then me playing small is leading my children to play small.

Oh, that's so good.

And so, Vicki, I'd love to hear what's coming up for you.

Well, several things, but one of the things I wanted to share is Karen was just talking about the be you more or however she said it. And I have a big picture that's on my wall right behind my screen here that is. It says beautiful, but it says be then Y O U to full. And so it's up there as a reminder all the time to be me. And for those that know me, that's one of the reasons I started my podcast, thanks to Stacy, because I had spent my whole life filtering my voice because I didn't piss somebody off. I didn't want somebody to think I was this way or that way and all of those things. Right. And so it's been very liberating to start the podcast and that's even morphed on its own as well. But the other thing that came up for me is, as women, we are almost taught. Now, that may not be true today, but I am a little bit older than you, Karen. I am 64. But for me, I was taught that you have a man to rescue you. The man is supposed to make the money, and the man is the one in charge and all of those things. And so I spent a lot of them, especially my younger years, looking for a rescue. Not to say that I'm completely out of it now. Every now and then I think, holy crap, somebody just come in here and do this for me.

But, you know, it is just one of those things.

And I'm sure other people have experienced that too. Just last week I thought, damn it, somebody on that white horse with the, you know, I'm ready. But I don't get in that space very often. And the other thing is, as entrepreneurs, we're almost pitted against each other. Most of the time. This person's my competition. If they do this similar thing to me, I'm supposed to make sure that I don't say nice things about them because they're going to be taking from me. And so it's beautiful as we're all sharing this and we're helping other people, like in the comments and all, to recognize that you can actually be very similar, but you're all different. And we all bring our own little Secret sauce to the table. So what one person that is going to be, oh, my God, Jamie's the best person for me is somebody else is going to say, that's Sarah for me, or that's Karen or Stacy, or there's Nikki or that's Louise. So it's like, we don't all like the exact same flavors in food. We don't all like the same flavors in the stuff that we're absorbing here. We're getting a taste of it. And so I think it's beautiful that we have this community of people that we can share like this and say, this person does this great and be not in competition against one another. My uncle, who was a mentor of mine, he's passed away, but he used to say, the competition is not the store next door. It's you and how you're doing your customers. And so that is us all the time being able to honor the people that are looking to us for guidance and giving them the best secret sauce that we possibly can and giving the other people around us the ability to do the same thing in their own way. And so that's just what I wanted to share.

Oh, my gosh. It comes back to that competition. Is that how you say Karen?

Cooperation, where you cooperate together? Yeah. You see that you can support each. It's why even in my mastermind, I start each week with tell me a win. And I want people, women to get used to. And men get used to saying Eloise. I do tend to attract women in the group.

But.

But.

And then it actually, it's makes other women feel like, oh, I could do that. Oh, it's like what we were talking about, what Jamie said about you're rising up and it gives. It's a permission slip. Be bigger, bolder, higher, faster, smarter, all of those things. And the more we see other women doing it, it gives us permission. And not only that excitement.

Oh, yes.

Oh, I get to do that, huh? I get to be that way.

So.

And then somebody asked, why do some of us. Why are we less? Some of it does have to do with some of what we learned. Like, and somebody else said, the more we play small, the more we teach our kids. So some of it has to do with our home environments and what we are taught about, like, being a woman or just even in your family. And so there's something called masochistic equilibrium. I don't know if you guys have.

Ever heard of this.

It's this weird thing that if you grow up in a home, whatever you're taught you're taught you're masochist to keep bolivium your comfort zone. So you're taught that. And it goes with anything. It goes with love, with money, power, this and that. So I'll just talk. Or happiness. I'll just talk about it in terms of happiness, which is kind of the largest umbrella. So if you grow up and you get used to your home, your family, your childhood is 40% happiness and 60% pain. I'll exaggerate things just to make the point. And so that's what your masochistic equilibrium is. And then you go out into the world and you start to get happier, richer, more successful, but your masochistic equilibrium is down here. Then you might self sabotage and bring yourself down to your masochistic equilibrium level. So we have to watch out for that and be okay with rising above our discomfort is our comfort zone. And we have to get out of that and kind of re parent ourselves and teach ourselves to not go there and to, as Jamie said, to rise higher. I almost see it as like rising higher. That's because it keeps you down here.

And then it goes back to what Sarah was saying with better together. Right. And being up.

Yeah.

I wanted to say really quickly, I couldn't see the name of the person who had talked about dimming their light and then affecting their. Affecting their children. And it's so funny because Jamie and I had this conversation on my podcast interview. And I hope everyone goes and listens to Jamie because you'll see my face the whole time. It's like jaw on the ground with.

Like the bomb shoes.

We were having so much fun, but.

You were dropping so much wisdom. And it reminded me of the conversation that we had that I wanted to say to the person who made that comment. I grew up the same way thinking I couldn't shine my light bright because I was like, oh, I have to be small and I have to play it safe and not make any noise and not get noticed. And it's like when you worry about having the light switch on and you're always worried about turning it off to save the electricity and save the money. I want you guys to imagine a dimmer switch. I want you to get some electrical blue tape. And you know, you can put the light on and put the tape on where it keeps the dimmer switch light on and bright. I want you to think about that every day. And when you're at home with your kids or when you go out that door, have your light as bright as you want it because guess what? It lights up other people. Doesn't do anything negative. It actually lights the way. And like Jamie said, if you're too bright and you're not their light, then they can go find some other dim light to hang out with.

But just. I just want to say you guys.

Are good light bright, and it'll just.

Light up everybody else.

It's really free light to give free electricity.

People doesn't come around very often.

And then we just got another comment earlier, which is, it happens a lot. The got very withdrawn in a bad marriage. Tried to hide to keep my ex from getting onto me. I was always the outgoing, joking, a little loud type. I'm just now beginning to find that me again. And it's just where I need to go. And I love that. I love that because it's so easy to lose yourself between marriage, kids, and you lose your identity, and all of a sudden you're like, what am I doing? Who am I? And then you wake up and you're wanting something, and, yeah, it's just beautiful when you recognize it. All right, Luis, I'm putting you on the spot. You're the guy.

We want to hear from you.

Well, I find it interesting because last year, 2022, we all. We had some friends, and we all kind of said what we wanted for the new year. And I said, more me. And people were like, what? It was funny. But then people asked me, well, what do you actually mean? Well, I said, well, more me means that I can. If I kind of hone in on what I am and who I am, the more I'll be able to give. So it's kind of like a bit of a selfish act to really ultimately shine your light with other people. And I was just having a conversation with my partner just last week, and she just had this random question. She's like, when was the last time you cried? And I was like, whoa, it's been a while. And it's just interesting to go back to the comments about women being taught a particular way. Well, we all have our different kind of what we're being taught and how we're constructed. And it's ultimately, we all have our stories to share, but at the end of the day, it's like, how do you want to actually be your higher self? And I think by being able to do that, we all have to go through these small little obstacles to be able to reach that. But it kind of got me thinking. It's like, wow, when was the last time I cried? And for me, it's ultimately really tried to be more human as possible. If I'm sad, well, I'm going to rejoice in that sadness because it's like me being able to finally tap into something that wasn't there before, which makes me realize, and Stacy, you mentioned a couple times awareness. And for me that's just the beginning because once you reach that awareness, it's like, okay, well now let's put into action into everything that I do and to everything that I'm thinking and how I speak to people and the words that I choose and the thoughts. It's like it really becomes this rabbit hole. But it's into the positive direction. And yeah, just being able to kind of. And I really like everyone's putting all the message is that because we realize we all kind of have lived similar things, maybe through a different perspective or a different route here and there. But ultimately, I mean, not being able to shine your light, suppressing your emotions, not being able to tone your light down because of the way people might perceive you, I mean, that's me right there. And it's just so interesting to hear from all of you being able to say, wow, this is actually okay to share this and talk about it. And then that's the only way to really move through it. And I think it's really the action taking that has helped me the most because it's really by making. And I really like that our discomfort is our comfort zone. The only thing that really ultimately stays the same is, well, that's constant, it's change. And I think once you embrace that, you're on a road to self discovery of really being able to impact not only yourself, but other people around you. And it's really by doing the thing right.

So do the thing.

And it's the thing I didn't share with you guys about Luis is I've seen him go through his own transformation, just through this world. Coming from the science researcher background to now finding his voice, activating it. And then his community got him to do these walking videos where he then is sharing them. And I don't think they're public yet. He's still keeping it private in the group, but eventually they'll be public, eventually sharing his thoughts on who he is, what he wants and just everything going on. And it's been. And he's surprised because people are loving them. And he's like, why do you want to listen to me talk for 30 minutes? But we're literally getting to see you find yourself and talk through these experiences, which is really cool. So, yeah, I'm so glad that you're we're here.

Because it really depends on your perspective. I mean, what you have in your head may not actually be what's really happening. Because I thought by me taking up space and speaking, and this comes from old family friends and my family themselves. Well, you always want attention. You always take up the spotlight. And I realize that that's just my form of communication. That's my form of actually bringing my thoughts to life. And by me speaking it, that's my way of being able to like, oh, I. That's what I'm thinking. I don't really write things down. And me being able to realize that I'm not here to attract all this attention, be the center of attention. No, it's really my way of being able to process different thoughts and me being able to work certain emotions and it's just like I was not able to do that ever. And now that I realize that that's my form, it's like, no, I'm not going to take up any space. This is the way I am. This is the way I tend to process my thoughts, my emotions. And this is something that I really need. Although I've been constructed and told, don't cry, don't do this and that, it's like, no, I need that to actually happen. And I think by being confident and just being with people like yourselves, it really allows me to understand that that's really what we're all here for.

For.

Yeah.

And please share, Luis, share with everyone what your group is and how they can find it. And for those people that are watching that want to join.

Yeah. So it's new Dynamo you. The idea behind is to get 30 minutes of movement because once you connect with your body, it allows you to kind of tap into other perspectives of your life. And of course, I spoke with my grandmother. She passed away a couple years ago and she told me that she always did her exercises. And it got me really thinking that being fit is not just important now for your health, but it's really a longevity and it's really a lifestyle where you really start to think, well, what am I going to be like in 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years? The best time to start now, because once you have this kind of zest for life, you don't want your body to be the one thing that's holding you back. And something that I learned from my grandmother and really being able to think long term and saying, I want to be this passionate, this curious at age 80, 90, because that's when she passed away. And I don't see why right now is not the moment to start. And being able to take that control of deciding and choosing to be that way, you can actually kind of manifest that until your own emotional mental health and it all comes together. And Jamie was speaking about spirituality. I think that's right along with the. With that whole concept.

Yeah. And where do they find your group?

Yeah, go to Facebook. It's DynamoYou.com that is the site itself. And we're happy to receive anyone. And we do 30 minutes of movement. You just post your photo. And it's kind of an accountability initiative. And everyone's just loving it and being able to see everyone's life and how they are just being able to invest themselves and take care of themselves. So dynamoyou.com and also there's a Instagram page, also dynamo.com so there you go. And, yeah, that's. That's basically the idea behind it.

Awesome. Thank you. And Sarah, please feel free to share where people can find out about you.

Okay. They can find me on Instagram at thereal. Sarah Moses. And it's S A R A and Moses. And I have the Do it now community. Thanks to Stacey Lauren. Brand new and just building. And I wanted to say thank you so much to everybody, and I'm so, so, so excited to be a part of Jamie's movement forward. I mean, I feel like just even her wanting to do this. Look what it's brought together. And so I want to be reminded of when Jamie's got all of her stuff coming up. So I hope we're not gonna.

Yeah, yeah, we're gonna do her for sure.

Yeah.

And then Vicki, my group is on Facebook. It's Make Lasting Change. And the way you get to it is you go to vickypool.com so that's V I C K I E p o l e.com and then I'm on Instagram at the Underscore Enlightened Peach. And my peachy peeps are this month, we're all about the magic of life and where we find it and discover it in the most mundane task and underlying places that we would never discover it without really looking. So that it's the month of magic.

Great.

And Karen.

Well, my last name is Salmon and everybody mangles it. I'm always. I'm always not Salmon. I always say Salmon, not salmon on salmon. So my website is not sam.com.

Oh, I love that.

I do.

Sarah and I have a lot of free stuff there that I give out if you want, I have free anxiety training and branding books. You just go over there, not seven.com and then not follows me on Instagram and Facebook also. So.

And if you guys are looking for business advice on website SEO, everything on branding, she has a mastermind that's starting up soon that I just rejoined. It's incredible. So feel free to just message me directly on that or put mastermind in the comments. And then, sorry, my dog's going crazy. And then Jamie, the one that got us all together. What I didn't mention earlier was being in your community. It just started the actual online space. But that was when I realized how much because it's all about the soul igniter and I realized how important it is to do that. And with the people in her community.

It is.

Every person is in there, but it's like someone that just wrote a book. I just bought that book. All these different amazing women. And her masterclass is coming up on Thursday. And do you want to just kind of share a little bit about that and invite people to that as well?

And it's free and it's great.

It's free, right?

Yeah.

And I just want to say thank you to everybody that jumped in this conversation because it made it so much more rich and fun and playful. And Stacy, thanks for organizing. You are such a gem and so powerful. So thank you and everybody that joined in this conversation. I would love for you to jump in with me if I resonate with you and some of the conversations that we had today resonate with you. It is only for ladies. I'm sorry guys, but other people here are taking men. But if you want to jump in my community, it's Lux every day. That's L U X E every day on Facebook and you can ask to join there. And then my Instagram is Lux every day life. And again, it's luxe because it stands for lead a unique, extraordinary existence every day. But I would love for you to join me in the hot mess to hot success masterclass because it's going to be a power hour of four hours. So it's this Thursday at noon Eastern time. And you can join that by going to Lux, L u x e everyday.com forward/hot success because we are going towards the hot success and we're going to be bringing clarity to all the hot mess and doing it with, if it would be okay with you, all that we do with fun and make massive transformation. Join in because I would love to.

Have you and you call it a hot success formula, right?

Yeah.

I love that it's.

I'm your hot mess mentor to get hot success. I've decided.

It's so exciting. Thank you guys, each of you so much for doing this. I am just, I mean, it's incredible when you're able to get with people and be able to talk about these things that have plagued a lot of us for so long. And to be able to have these conversations and take the shame out of it and just put it in the open, get into that self awareness so that you can actually take action. I mean, that's where the most amazing things happen. So I really appreciate each of you for being here in your time and thank you guys for coming in the comments really quickly.

Somebody asked, is there a replay? Because if you're working on Thursday, I totally understand the replay. Go ahead and still opt in and sign up for it because the replay will be available for just a couple days and then that you, you can catch it on Friday or Saturday.

Okay.

All right, you guys, thank you. I appreciate everybody.

I appreciate you so much.

Don't wait for opportunity. Create it. Create it.

Thanks for listening to the do the Thing podcast. We hope you enjoyed the show. But even more, we hope you'll be inspired to do the thing. Do you have a burning question on Doing the Thing that you'd like answered? How about an inspiring do the Thing story of your own that you'd like to share? We'd love to hear all about it. Just leave us a voice message at dothething callcast co or email us@helloothethingpodcast.com.