Host Your Own Event Challenge: Explore Why Nick Gray And Stacey Want You To Host A Two-Hour Cocktail Party
29 Jul 2023 · 40 min
Nick Gray and Stacey Lauren challenge you to host a two-hour cocktail party to build community. Nick's formula: name tags, icebreakers, cocktails only, kick everyone out at two hours. Start by picking a date three to four weeks ahead and recruiting five people who say yes first.
Questions this episode answers
Over 93% (survey of 100 readers who hosted their party).
Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday nights.
Three to four weeks from when you start (the "party Runway").
Two hours (set a start and end time and end on schedule).
Aim for five initial yeses from your core group.
Chapters
I do really believe 100% from every part of me that everyone has the capacity to be able to do the things that they want and not to be held back by the mental baggage that's in our head that we want to push through.
Welcome to the do the Thing podcast. In each episode, we get down and personal with people who go after the things they want to make all their wildest dreams come true. Join us as we unveil and dissect a formula for what it takes to do the thing. Here is your host, Stacy Lauren.
Hey, everyone. Welcome to the do the Thing podcast. This is your host, Stacy Lauren. Well, the time has come again for another do the Thing challenge, and this one's actually a little bit different than the other challenges I've done because normally I bring in a bunch of different experts to help plan the challenge that I'm about to do. But you know what? Today's guest is so good that we just decided to do it with me and him because it's something that he is an expert at. And so I am so excited because I read his book last year and it's called the Two Hour Cocktail Party, and it really got me so excited about the idea of being able to create your own experience with the people that you want to meet and the people that you want to have in your life. And so I am so excited because we are going to do a challenge on helping people host their own events by using his specific formula on how he hosts the event and then also putting the do the Thing formula in the background to help our community to be able to follow through and do the thing that they want. So I'm so excited to welcome Nick Gray to the show. Hey, Nick.
I'm excited to be here and to talk about making new friends and building your network and how their life can change by learning to host a good event.
Yeah, and I'm so glad you said that, because I think it's important for people to know, first of all, why do I even want to do this? Why do I want to host my own event? And it's funny, I was just listening to our episode that we did last September, and I'd forgotten this until I listened to it. And I'm so excited to have you just kind of share, because I think this is such a big reason why people should be able to start being the leader in their area and be able to host their own events. It was that museum company that you had owned was really successful and launched because you built it through hosting events.
Yes, I hosted events and it changed my life. I learned how to build a network and how to have more acquaintances and just meet people. Which it sounds kind of silly, right? That you meet people by hosting parties. You're like, wait, how do I meet people by hosting parties? Isn't that counterintuitive? But what I found was, is that if you want to meet interesting people, you have to do interesting things. And that your life will completely change if you start to host events. The secret is everyone wants to know someone who brings people together. Everyone wants to be friends with that person, wants to know that person who hosts events and brings people together. I found that could be done with a simple two hour cocktail party or happy hour or mocktails party. Doesn't have to involve alcohol, by the way. I don't drink alcohol myself. There's not a single drink recipe in my book. But we use that phrase cocktail party because it's a lightweight social gathering that's easier than dinner parties. Please don't do dinner parties. But yes, I launched my last business on the basis of my network. I built a multimillion dollar company. But maybe you don't want to launch a multi million dollar company. Maybe you just want to make friends and, and get new clients or boost your career or just know people in your neighborhood when you go to a PTA meeting. I found that when you learn to host a good event to bring your friends together, you can add value. You can learn how to help people meet new people, which is so hard to do these days.
Yeah. And you're really just being able to create your own environment by being able to curate the people that you want to invite and then have them invite people. And it just adds so much value to just the community that you want to build in your own area.
Yes, 100%.
And I love how you mentioned it's basically not only a secret hack to meeting people, but you're also giving a gift to the person by being able to invite them and having them do something new.
That's the big thing. A lot of people, which we talked about this. What do you think the two biggest fears are? The number one fear of a new host is that nobody will show up. The number two fear is that what will people do during my party? Will they be bored? What will happen? And I've worked so hard. I've helped hundreds of people learn how to host their first event. And we know that number one, that idea that nobody show up. When you follow my formula, my plan, you'll know that people will show up. And in fact, over 93% of everybody who says they're going to show up is actually going to show up. I got that number just by doing a survey of 100 people that read my book and hosted their party. So you know that people will show up because you'll put in all the work ahead of time by using your core, the party Runway, double opt in intros, all things like that. But then at the party, you're going to help lead a few rounds of Icebreakers and you're going to mix the room up so that people will be chatting with others. And that's why your party will be successful and why people are going to love it because they're going to spend so much time talking to others and having a lot of little conversations.
Yeah, I love that. And I also love that idea of the way you talk about it being a two hour cocktail party. And you use the word cocktail because you don't want people to have dinner there because you want it to be easier. And on the last episode, I like the wording used where you said minimum viable party. Because I think a lot of people, they get caught up in something being this extravagant thing and that people need all this stuff when they really don't. They just want to have people get together and enjoy their time together.
You're exactly right. What's the easiest party? Stacy? Let's just get people together. And you know what? So many people think that hosting is about the food or the decorations. And what I found, look, I've hosted hundreds of parties myself, and I tell you, I would rather have someone leave my party hungry rather than bored. My job as a host is to help them meet and mix and mingle. You can certainly have a dinner party. You can feed your friends some other time. But with my book and with my challenge to your audience is to say, let's learn how to host a party with some constraints. Because I think a lot of people in your audience, they're overachievers, they love to do your challenges. And I'm going to say your challenge is to try to host a party that's different from what you might think. And that's what I'm so excited to work with you on this challenge. It's learning a new way. It's learning how to do something different because people think, oh, why do I need a book to learn how to host a party? This is obvious. And yet what I found was there's a lot of common sense advice. There's a lot of practical tips and tricks that I've learned that I think other people can benefit from.
Okay, so how long do you think we should have this challenge be for?
So, basically, I tell people from the day that you get my book, and after you read chapter one, your challenge should start, then you need to pick a day that's three or four weeks away. And so from the moment that you read my book and you read to the end of chapter one, which says pick a date, by the way, the best day for parties, I found is not what most people think. The best day, in my experience is a Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday night. And so you want to choose a Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday night that's three to four weeks away. So I'll leave it based up to you. But I would say the challenge could be open for five weeks from the very start of somebody saying, I'm interested in this. And maybe they can't exactly do three or four weeks away, but within five weeks of watching this, of saying, I'm going to do this challenge, you should have hosted your first gathering. And I'll tell you why. Because many people will come up with a lot of excuses. Does this happen in your other challenges? It must happen with you all the time. How do you deal with this?
Oh, I deal with it. You ready? It's the coolest thing ever. The first pre dare I give them is it literally says, tell me all of your excuses on why you can't do this and then tell me why you can do it.
Yes, yes, yes. You are exactly right. And I hear a lot of excuses. I hear my house is too small, My house is too messy. I live too far away. All my friends work. None of my friends will. My friends even hang out and like each other. I keep my friends in different buckets. I don't want to mix those buckets. So all of those are excuses. And I've heard all of them. And by the way, this has to be hosted at home. For 95% of the people, home is the right place. Even if you live in a tiny apartment like I do, your home is the best place to host the party. But if not, then we'll include some links of other venues or options.
So the first thing they're going to read chapter one. Then they're going to pick a day that's three to four weeks away from that, and then getting over their excuses on why they can't do it. And then what would be the next step?
The next step that they're going to do is they're going to message their core group now, your core group are your close friends, your neighbors. They are not the person you have a crush on, the client you're dying to land a deal with, the neighbor you've been fighting with, and you see this as a rose to mend the relationship. No. Your first party should be a low stakes affair. Please do not host this party as part of the challenge. Trying to impress and reach up from the top shelf of these people you want to connect with. Your first party should just be chill. Is there a better way that I could phrase this, Stacy? You know my method, but you know what I'm talking. Yeah.
No, I love it. Because I think a lot of times people have these high hopes or dreams of what they want something to be. But the first thing is we want them to do the thing and to host the party. And so the easiest way they can do it is. Is going to be the way that they do it. And then they can grow and evolve as they get to know the steps and they're building the muscle and the practice of using your formula and your system and the way you're designing your events.
Exactly. Look, if you're in the do the thing community, you want to make your life better. And I can tell you that the people that have the best success with this are people who learn how to make hosting a habit. They go through life collecting interesting people. And so with this formula that we're about to teach you, you should maybe be hosting once a quarter. Just don't do this once. That's what I'm going to teach you and show you is how to make hosting easy so that you can be someone who hosts. It doesn't have to be every month, but it could be every other month, every quarter, and you start collecting interesting people in your town.
Okay, so this is great. They're going to message their core group and you kind of gave instructions on. On who not to message. So.
Yes, and you're going to message them with a message like this. So once you pick the date and you say, all right, I'm going to do this, I think I'm going to do it. You're going to think, who are the five people that you can ask first? And you're going to send them a message that says like this. Hey, Stacy, I'm thinking of hosting a Happy hour on July 17th at my apartment from 6 to 8pm If I do it, would you come? Okay, that's the message you're going to send to those first five who you can be vulnerable with that phrase. If I Do it. Would you come? You're looking for commitments and you're going to try to collect five people who say yes to that message. If you can't get five people, then widen your group a little bit, ask a couple more. And if you really can't get five people to say yes that they would come, then you're just going to change the day or change the time. Ask them, oh, would next week work? Oh, would it be better on a Wednesday instead of a Monday? Oh, is the timing? Oh, is the weekend better? Maybe it is the case that for your group in your community, Saturday is better for some reason. Please don't do Saturday. Those are what I call red level days. They're socially competitive and you're much more likely to have people cancel. You're more likely to have no shows, and it's harder for people to say yes due to other commitments. So I suggest a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday night. If you can't get those five yeses, change the day of the week, push the date back a week, see if you can get those five yeses. Once you get those yeses, you are on. You are doing the thing. And now, congratulations. You've unlocked the next step. You're going to create a page to collect RSVPs. You're going to get all those five people to RSVP yes. And then you're going to start to invite a wider group, what I call your great guests. These are your acquaintances, your loose connections. You're going to look on your Facebook, on your LinkedIn, for people in town that you haven't talked to in a year or two. You're going to invite some more of your neighbors. You'll ask your friends if they want to bring a friend. You can allow them to bring the plus ones. But then your goal is to go from that 5 up to 15. 15 is really the minimum that we want here. We want you out of a minimum of 15 people who say yes, and here's why is because I find that going into a room with less than 15, the energy just isn't the same. You have to do more work babysitting, you have to make more introductions. But with 15 people, the room is just alive and it kind of runs on autopilot. You have to do less work as a host. And that's what Stacy and I are trying to show you is how to make this easy, how to do the thing and make it run on autopilot.
Yeah, I love that and I love all your terms. They're so cool because it comes from Your experience of helping so many people host events successfully. And I think that I love the way that you think too, because you're doing it in a way that you're not getting the person to burn energy on hosting the event and even running it by you. Even having that knowledge of knowing 15 people is really where you want to be to be able to do it.
Yeah, yeah. 15 is good, and I recommend 15. What I don't want you to do is have too many and more than 20. More than 20 people at your party for your first one is too many. So please shoot for between 15 and 20, and I'll tell you why. More than 20. You may feel comfortable. You may say, you know what? I'm gonna do the thing expert. I can do this thing, and I can do it. Just go slow. Go slow, because I want you to be someone who makes hosting a habit. Remember, the most successful people are those that do regularly what others only do occasionally. And so if you say, look, I can have tons of people say, okay, save them for your next party. For your first one, Your goal is 15 to 20, because when you run the icebreakers, you want it to go fast, and with more than 20, it can take a little too long, and people dilly dally.
Okay, and then what is the next step? So now they figured out who they're inviting. They invited their core group with the message of, how does this work? And that's when you're picking the date, and then you're going outside of that group and you're adding more people. And then it sounds like there's also the event page that will help them create as well through the challenge.
Yes, exactly. You're going to collect those RSVPs. Now, if you are doing the do the thing challenge, then please reach out to me when you create your RSVP page. And as helping Stacy out here, I am personally going to help look at your RSVP page. Me and my team will give you feedback on how to improve it. We'll cheer you on. But I think that would be cool. Stacy, maybe they could share their RSVP page or how they're doing to the group in the Facebook group. And let's all be a part of this together. Once you get those five yeses, that is really your milestone of saying, I am doing it, and I am in it. Okay? And from those five yeses, you now hopefully have at least two weeks to fill up to get to 15. So that's why that concept of the party Runway is so important. You don't want to say, I'm going to do the thing challenge and host my party next week. Please don't do that. We want to give you a long Runway to fill up all those people. Because you'll notice that as you go to the grocery store, you go to yoga, you go to soccer practice, pta, you'll just start meeting interesting people. And anyone you talk to for a couple minutes who you think I wouldn't mind continuing the conversation, you're going to say, hey, my friends and I are hosting a little happy hour in two weeks. Can I send you the info? That's the phrasing you're going to use to these new people you meet or people you haven't talked to in a while. Hey, I'm hosting a little happy hour in a couple weeks. Can I send you the info? That is such an easy yes for them to say yes to. Then you'll send them the link to the RSVP page. You'll say, hey, check it out. Would love for you to come by and meet some interesting people. That's how you're going to collect your additional RSVP's and you're going to fill up. And now once you get to 15, it's pretty much on autopilot. The book lays it out, but the important thing is you're going to send three reminder messages leading up to your event, which will guarantee a high attendance rate and also increase the level of excitement that people have. And those three reminder messages, if Stacy wants me to walk through them, I'm happy to. But the cadence and the things you include are so important.
Then you're making me think too, how cool it is when you set the date and you have this intention of hosting this party and you're starting to invite the people as you go through your day. You're going to naturally meet people that fit what you want for the party. It's kind of the way the universe works where it's like you set that intention and then all of a sudden people show up.
Yeah, you start to be reminded of people. When we have that intention and when it's in top of mind, you're like, oh, wait a second, that person at the gym that I keep saying hello to but I hardly know anything about their life, or that neighbor that I see when I'm walking my dog. Oh, I can invite them. You'll be surprised, I think, at the people that just show up in your life. And by the way, we want that randomness of different interesting people. You want your different social Groups, you want these random. There's this guy, his name is Maddox, he lives in Dallas, and he invites bartenders, his hairstylist, random people at the mall that are helping him shop. He invites all these different people because he says, I talked to this person for a couple minutes. They seem nice, they seem safe. I feel like I want them to come over. And he says, hey, I know this is random, but I'm getting together interesting random people in town. It's about half people I know well and half new people like yourself. Can I send you the info? Notice, by the way, the wording that we're using there, Stacy, for your first five, your core group. You're saying, if I do it, would you come? You're being vulnerable.
Yeah.
These other people, you're simply saying, can I send you the info? That's an easy, low pressure yes for them to say. And when you send them the info, your RSVP page in my book and the scripts we can share through Stacy and the group if you want. By the way, if you cannot afford to buy this book, if for some reason you wonder whether this book is right for you, Stacy and I will share some sample invites, some scripts that you can use, and you can use all of those things. I'm. I share all of my invites and you can copy paste it. Use my words exactly to help make this easier for you. We got you. We got your back.
That's so amazing. I just think this is incredible. So I would love to hear. So now we've got the people and now how do we help them with the party part?
So at the party itself, you're gonna have a minute by minute agenda. Now look, it's not that strict, but at least you have an idea of what happens at the party. And I'll tell you what happens at the party. You can think about my name. Nick. N. I C, K for the Nick party formula. N stands for name tags. You're going to use name tags for everyone that comes to your party. And by the way, if you think, oh, my friends are going to be name tags, what is this, a networking event? No, when you tell them in advance that there will be name tags, there'll be no resistance. So in the invitations, in the rsvp, you'll say, hey, come on over for a drink, meet somebody new, super casual. There'll be name tags because I'm bad with names. There'll be icebreakers, because I want you to meet some new people. What I find is as long as you set the expectations, people will not Resist the name tags and the icebreakers. So N is for name tags. I stands for icebreakers. You'll lead two and a half rounds of Icebreakers at your party to help people make new friends. C stands for cocktails only. Just like Stacy said. This is the minimum party. What's the least you can do for people to have the most amount of fun? Cocktails only. No dinner. Do not make this a dinner party. That's N. I, C was cocktails, and K stands for kick them out at the end. The party is only two hours long. You're going to set both a start time and an end time, and you'll mention both of those when you invite people. Now, most people never set an end time. Right? They just say, here's the start time, and they end and they let it dilly, dally and run out eventually. But you won't be doing that. And you're actually going to kick people out. And that, by the way, makes it easier for them to say yes. It makes it easier for you to do it on a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, when they know that this is not a five hour melee. A drinking bender. That's not what happens. This is a productive party. You're going to come and meet people and then go home so everybody can get their beauty rest. I know. I need mine.
Yeah. I just. I love that idea of the start and the end time. Because you already know what you're getting into before it starts.
Yeah, exactly. You know what you're getting into. And that's what we do, is we set the expectations. So the icebreaker. Most people have never done. Iceberg. They're terrified. Ooh. Won't it be weird to interrupt my party? Why would I interrupt? Everybody's having a good time. Well, what I find is that these icebreakers help people to end conversations because a lot of times we're too nice. And they also help start new conversations. They're a conversational crutch. So the two rounds of Icebreakers. The first one, let's say that you do it 20 minutes after the scheduled start time. And you're going to ask everybody, say, hey, everybody, let's go around the circle, say our names, say what you do for work or how you spend your day. And then let's say, what's one of your favorite things to eat for breakfast? What's one of your go to breakfast things by doing that? I know it sounds silly, but that icebreaker is easy to answer. And it doesn't cause our introverts or those with social anxiety to lock Up. No, I think icebreakers get a bad rep because people try to come up with a brain teaser or the most creative question, and that's not good. We want an easy icebreaker so you can say, name what you do for work and one of your favorite things for breakfast. Now, about an hour later, you'll do an advanced icebreaker. Okay. This is what I think of as a value additive icebreaker. And the question I use most often is what is a great piece of media that you've consumed recently that could be a documentary you watched, a book that you Read, a reality TV show that you binge watched, could be a great TV show or YouTube clip or something like that. But what's a great piece of media? Now, I give people a five minute warning for that last one, by the way. And I talk about all this in my book. I go through minute by minute exactly what to say, how to set it up, but I give them a five minute warning for that last one. I say, hey, everybody, in five minutes we're going to do our last icebreaker. Here's what the question will be so you can think about it. Grab a drink or use the restroom to freshen up if you need to. And we'll do that last icebreaker in five minutes. So that's generally what happens at the party. And then 10 minutes before the scheduled end time, you're going to make a last call, you'll make a last goal. Hey, everybody, party's scheduled to wrap up in about 10 minutes. Grab a last drink, say hey to somebody new, and we'll start to wrap up soon. That's how you help kick people out at the end.
Honestly, I feel like this is an introvert stream. I mean, I'm sure it's amazing for extroverts, but I do think it's a dream for an introvert because having some structure like this around a party, it really helps you not burn as much energy, especially if you have trouble with social situations. It will bring out this extroverted side of you that you didn't even know existed.
It really is an introvert stream. Somebody said to me last night, I was talking to him, he hosted a party in Hawaii, which is so cool. And he said this party gave me the permission to just turn it on autopilot. It gave me the idea, he said I didn't have to make as many decisions because you told me exactly what to do along the way. And it was so successful because I didn't have to decide anything. And it allowed me as an introvert as someone with social anxiety to just put somebody else in charge.
Is there anything else that you think would be helpful during the challenge?
I think just engaging in the Facebook group. If you're having any hurdles, if you have any questions to reach out to me or Stacy. I really love helping people with these challenges. I'm on a mission myself to get 500 people to do this challenge. And so I'm on a mission to help people, and I've helped hundreds already. And I love taking an active role. But if you have questions, if you're like, oh, look, I really want to do this challenge, but. Or if you're only getting three people who've said yes and you wonder how to get the rest, I would love to be active and engaged and I will try to help you out.
I actually, I've had this happen. I'm doing a start a podcast challenge right now. We're in week. This is starting of week three. And what people say is the best part of it is just knowing they have me there for support as a guide to help them through it. So I love that you're going to be able to do that for them, because I think when people know that someone's there to help them through it, it actually kind of softens the risk in your mind.
And that's what I think is so cool about your do the Thing framework and challenge and everything that you teach, that you really help people to be part of something bigger, that you help them overcome these things. Hosting is the same way. Everybody says, oh, I've wanted to host for so long. Oh, I've been meaning to do a housewarming party, but now it's been in a year and a half, and now with the do the Thing challenge, they finally have a reason to come together and to really do it. The last thing that I would just say is, and I'm going to ask Stacey for your advice on this. What do you think about this? That if someone says, oh, I absolutely cannot do it at my home, or, oh, I don't know if I can get that many people, what do you think about them finding a co host, Finding someone in their town? I do this sometimes if my small apartment isn't big enough, I'll ask a friend, I'll say, hey, I'm doing this thing, this challenge to host people. Can I host at your home? Would you be willing to co host with me? And you would be shocked how many people are so open to that idea. How many people, just like you, want to host people, but they just haven't and. And you can be the person that can help make that happen.
I love that idea so much because it takes the pressure off of just you and just having someone in it with you. I think it relieves that. So if someone is really nervous and that's what's paralyzing them to even start, I think that's such a great way to just put a toe in and be able to do the thing, as they say.
I have a resource on my webpage which will include in the do the Thing challenge that is all about using a co host. And if you're going to use a co host, they need to know that you're doing the do the Thing challenge and that you're doing a two hour cocktail party that has name tags and icebreakers. They need to know that ahead of time so that they are bought in that when they invite their friends, they know that there'll be name tags that it's not. I'm just saying this as a small thing for those people, but it's not just like, oh, this is this one group. No, everybody at the party is going to do name tags and icebreakers and RSVP and things like that. I'll include the link if you're going to do a co host or just ask for it in the group and we'll send that link over.
I'd love to just hear a couple more of the people that have hosted events and kind of what that's been like for them as well.
Yeah, sure. There's this guy, Tom, who's based out of Houston and he is an introvert. He's a professor at a university, which you might not think that that's an introvert, but he says, look, I feel so comfortable in the classroom, but socially maybe for me it's outside of my control. And Tom is a film person, he's a screenwriter. And he said, your book gave me the permission to have an agenda. It gave me the ability to host something I really wanted to do to build a community of filmmakers in Houston. And he said, now, thanks to your book, I never would have hosted, but it gave me the scripts of how to invite people, what to say and how to kick people out. So that's one example. There's a woman whose name is Tatiana. She lives in Seattle and she is a mother of two kids and she has a business that does stroller mom workouts. And she said, I thought I knew how to host an event before, but I did your book to learn something. And she said it made it so easy. I now have my little party box of supplies, which by the way, this won't be an expensive challenge. You can host the whole party for under $100. And that's just the supplies. You may need to buy some basic alcohol, some seltzer, some juice and non alcoholic options. You're going to buy some name tags, some plastic cups and some markers. But she said, I have my whole party supply box and when it's party day, I take it out and I have everything. She said, I've hosted four parties now and my business has doubled. It's doubled because people simply think of me more often. I'm top of mind in my community because I host events and I invite people. So that's another example. Should I give some more?
Yeah, this is really good. I've actually you just gave me two more dares, so yeah, I would love to do like a couple more examples.
Great. Cool. There is a guy who just moved to Phoenix. His name is Sean. And Sean is, you know, he's a little younger, he's in his late 20s, I think. And he said, look, I want to build a community in Phoenix and I want to meet people and I'm serious and I'm committed to doing that. And he's been hosting every single month. And he started with my framework, but he's now grown it to doing grills. He does a grill out where he cooks hamburgers and hot dogs. Okay. But he started learning the formula first. No food, just basic drinks. And the reason we do that is just to make it easy so you can do this again and again. And so now he hosts every single month, literally anyone interesting that he meets. He says, hey, my friends are doing this. He lets people bring people. And now he hosts hot dogs and hamburgers. And he still uses name tags, he still uses Icebreakers, but he understands the formula so that now he can apply his own ideas. I guess the other example I think about is that guy John from Hawaii who I talked to yesterday. He said, two hours, dude. In Hawaii, people show up an hour late. Do you think this is actually going to work? And I said, john, just follow my formula, you'll be surprised. And he told me yesterday, he said, you were absolutely right. He said, I actually had seven of my 15 people show up five minutes early. I said, what? Why? Why did that happen? He said, well, it was the reminders and the two hour constricted time frame that people knew that this wasn't something to show up late to. And they were so excited. He said, and this is what's important for all the people watching. People thanked him so much and I hear this again and again. You'll get more thank you notes for this party than anything else because you're creating the space. He said people are so hungry for connection. They want to meet more people. They are starving to make new friends. And when you host this party, that's what you're going to be. You're going to be that person who brings people together.
Okay? So this is so good. I am just so excited right now and I can't thank you enough for doing this. For the do the thing community, I think it's going to be so amazing. I would love to hear just your number one piece of advice for the people listening on doing the thing in terms of them creating their own two hour cocktail party. Because I'm just feeling like people could be kind of in their head going, oh, this Nick guy, he sounds great. And Stacy, she's always telling me to do the thing, but I don't know if I can do that. So what would be your advice to those people?
My advice for those people is we have a list on my website that if Stacy wants to share of over, I think 250 people now that have hosted a party and they have shared their group photo to me. And so if you're curious, if you think, oh, this guy Nick can do that and he can do that stuff or Stacy can do it, but I can't do it. Well, I have worked for the last six years of my life refining and perfecting this formula so that everyone can do it. And I've fine tuned it and beta tested it with so many people to know that it works. And it works in different cultures and communities and different people. From the 19 year old college freshman to the 35 year old woman in Saudi Arabia with three kids, to the guy that's in his mid-40s in Italy, to Tatiana in Seattle to another guy, for example, there was a guy who said, I'm an extreme introvert, I'm so shy, I would never host a party. But he said I stepped up and I accepted the challenge in your book to do it. And I was shocked that I was able to actually make this happen. And this is guy who says that he has to take social anxiety medicine. He takes medicine for social situations to help him out. But he said, your book gave me the framework to make that happen. So for the do the thing community, what I would say is just follow the book. Follow the formula that we're going to lay out for you keep it a low stakes affair. Ask questions if you have questions, find a co host if you need one. But Stacy and I are going to help you make this a success. And Stacy knows how to make this happen. She knows how to give y' all dares. She knows how to, how to really empower you to stretch your life and to grow to be all that you can be. Because you probably want to host parties for a reason. Either you want to meet people. You wonder what your life could be like if you had a peer group that inspires and encourages you. You want your social calendar. You say, look, I've lived in this town for a certain number of years and I hang out with the same people and we do the same things. And you think that there could be more out there. You think that life could be bigger or brighter. And I know from talking and working with a lot of people that hosting parties is a means to an end. It's a means to help you meet new people, build big relationships, fill up your social calendar and add value to your community. Because this loneliness epidemic that's happening, this so called friendship recession is real. And while it might not be a big deal for you, I can bet you that some of the people that you're going to invite to your party haven't been invited to anything all year long. And it's going to mean a lot. You were. You are going to. I don't want to overhype it, but it's a big deal of what you're going to do.
Well, thank you again for coming on and doing this with me. And I'm so excited for this challenge. I'm bursting right now as I'm hearing you talk. I'm ready to just do this.
I can't wait. And I want to be involved. I hope you'll loop me in. Stacy, if you have questions and if people want me to look at their RSVP pages or anything, this is literally what I spend all day on now. I'm so passionate about it. And you know me, I love getting on phone calls to talk about parties and things like that. And in fact, Stacy might even share my phone number to a couple people in the group that I would be willing to have a call with them or talk or just brainstorm. So, Stacy, I'm putting myself in your hands to help your community. Let's make this a success and let's do some great parties.
Please share with everyone where they can buy your book and how they can follow along with you and just your whole thing that you've got going on.
Thanks so much. The name of my book is the two Hour Cocktail Party. You can find it on Amazon or anywhere you buy books. A pro tip, you can buy it on the audible. I recorded it myself. But the book is meant to be a handbook, a workbook with checklists. So I would suggest if you haven't bought it yet, to buy the paperback. And the paperback can be a guidebook for you and it makes it real a little bit more. Please send me a message. On social media I use Twitter and Instagram and Facebook. I'm on YouTube. My name on Twitter and Instagram where I'm most active there is at Nick Gray News. That's N I C K G R A Y G R A Y News N E W S and my website is nickgrainews.com or you can find my book where I have articles about how to host a happy hour, how to plan a networking event, how to use a co host and things like that. We'll include the notes in some of the show notes here.
And for everyone listening, we are going to be planning this challenge sometime this summer so we will keep you posted on when it's going to go and I would definitely 100% sign up because it's going to be unbelievable.
This is going to be so much fun and we're going to see so many great photos and send a message. If you're going to do this challenge, put a message right now and let us know. In the group, look at your calendar. Choose a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday night, at least three or four weeks in the future and say this is my date and your next step is to think about your core group. Who will be the first five people that you're going to invite?
All right guys, well do the thing. Don't wait for opportunity. Create it. And now it's time to host your two hour cocktail party.
Thanks for listening to the do the Thing podcast. We hope you enjoyed the show but but even more, we hope you'll be inspired to do the Thing. Do you have a burning question on doing the Thing that you'd like answered? How about an inspiring do the Thing story of your own that you'd like to share? We'd love to hear all about it. Just leave us a voice message at do the Thing callcast co or email us@helloothethingpodcast.com.
More from Stacey
Stand Up. Speak Up. Show Up. How Deborah Drummond Built a 1,200-Woman Global Media Movement
From Notes App to Published Author: Avery Brenna Crumrine on Turning Intention Into Action
Why Not Me? Geetha Sreedhar on Startup Exits, Bold Pivots, and Living a Life of Impact
The Why Not Today? Podcast - Season 3 - Episode 9 with Stacey Lauren, Podcast Host and Community Builder, Do The Thing
Emotional Resilience in Business: Insights from Stacey Lauren on Living a Purposeful Life