Ego vs. Soul: Why Successful Leaders Keep Self-Sabotaging | Dana Grant

What is one thing inside or on your heart that you have been dying to talk about but have yet to do so?

Wow, no one's ever asked me that. Um, I think what I'm dying to talk about is faith. I believe the medicine was saving me from an illness and it was killing me. And it wasn't until I challenged that— I mean, literally, the news came up one day, local practitioner, you know, um, being arrested for sexual assault. I'm like, oh no, oh no, this cannot be true.

Yeah.

But when all that unfolded and the truth really came out, I realized that I had to really lean in, not out. And I'm gonna say that was the real beginning of the deepest work I have ever done. I mean, I turned myself inside out. I mean, there are literally grief, gaining 80 pounds, building, making millions of dollars. Everything I did was not enough. Nothing made it better. I was hurting and grieving all the time. Grieving. I had 17 forms of staph that was eating without oxygen. I mean, I literally almost lost my legs. And I told God at that moment, If you saved my legs, I will be in service forever. It doesn't mean I'm gonna be perfect forever, but I'm gonna be faithful.

Hey guys, welcome back to One Part Lion, One Part Lamb, where we're here to help you rise, lead, and last. As always, we love you, and we're so grateful that you've chosen to spend your time with us today. One of the things we've been really, really focused on the last several months is bringing guests that really bring fire, bring inspiration, but also bring application. Bring desire but also bring direction. And today's guest is no different. After becoming a highly successful entrepreneur and co-founding Calico, uh, and as well as a best-selling author of Truth Within the Lie, which I'm excited about, I want to help you guys welcome Miss Dana Grant. What is going on?

I am so thrilled to be here. We have had— we've already had such a day. It's like I, I feel like we're just having a party.

Yeah, we should, we should. I know Quest was like, we're super busy.

Yeah.

Um, hadn't had— if not, we probably should just been mic'd up and just jamming.

I know, I know. I had a lot of great fun.

But, uh, one of the things— I guess the, the thing that I'm feeling led to ask you—

yeah, anything, anything you want to know, I'm here for it—

is what is one thing inside or on your heart that you have been dying to talk about but have yet to do so?

Wow, no one's ever asked me that. Um, I think we touched on it a little bit. I think what I'm dying to talk about is faith, how faith-driven I am and how connected I am to Source. But being born this seer, this intuitive, and so much judgment around that, but people leading with an enormous amount of facade. And I want to talk, I think it has to be talked about because there's so much being led out there and people are being so deceived. But even myself, I'm so disappointed when I find out that, and I think it's because I have attached an expectation to, a faith-led person, that they're going to show up with more integrity or more abundance. There's something more about it.

There's this phrase that really breaks my heart that I've heard said many times, and I wish it wasn't true in the moment. My prayer and hope is that over the next decade it changes, which is like, especially with the word Christian specifically, is that the greatest problem Christianity has is the Christian.

Oh, amen.

You know what I'm saying?

That right there. So I think that is something I don't talk about, but it's something something I think about when I'm 30,000 feet in the air. I think about it. I think about what I'm drawn to, the rooms I show up in. These are all faith-driven leaders. And when I find out there's been gossip or something being said, I handle it well. I just told someone and I said, listen, they wouldn't be talking about me if I wasn't someone to talk about. Let it go. But thank you for bringing it to me. But I can't help but think, why does it have to be that way? So I think, you know, that's something I don't talk about ever. Because I don't want to give it energy. And I believe energy and vibration is everything. But what I— what I'm talking about is where I'm going to vibrate. But if I was going to talk about something I don't want to talk about, or it's that I'm— I don't know if I'm struggling with it, but I'm really paying attention to it.

Well, I said we— I said we workshop it for the next few minutes.

Oh, I love it. Let's do it.

My first thought, my general thought that I hear as you're resonating with that, and something that I've struggled with as well, because I feel like, uh, humanity as a whole, yeah, has been taught that they're not enough unless they appear a certain way. And then that's been heavily re-influenced by social media and key relationships. And it's like, um, and I know I'm saying this from personal experience in that I used to be very performance-driven. Yeah, like, I just, I have to, you know, it's part of the homeless journey, it's part of the Stephen Scoggins journey, it's part of all these different parts of my stories. And, and it wasn't literally until like I was 48, like 2 years ago, that I was forced to really kind of face the performance side of myself. The one who wasn't controlling, but would set things in motion to make sure I got the outcome that I wanted. Or that I was pursuing, right? So I would be the person to, and being full and transparent, I might walk into a room and flex. Right? And it took me a long time to realize I don't have anything to prove to anybody. I don't need to flex about anything. In fact, every time I do that, I'm actually doing a disservice to my faith. Ah, right. And I feel like— and the reason I say that is because I feel like— and this is where I think workshopping it, so it would be kind of fun— I feel like most of us don't know we're actually doing it. Most of us don't know that we're prejudging people. Most of us don't understand that we're bringing a certain bias into a certain interaction. Most of us don't know that we're flexing in the moment or we're trying to make ourselves bigger, feel bigger than we are. You know, both of us have been around amazing human beings that are high profile. And the world says currently in today's modern times, or at least it seems like that, that we should say, well, we know so-and-so. Well, we know so-and-so. I know so-and-so. Well, I just had dinner with so-and-so, right?

Yeah.

And to make it appear as if we are important, not realizing that we were born important. And I feel like that's what I'm seeing that's kind of being unwound a little bit. It's one of the reasons why we completely rebranded the show. We started talking about faith more. We started talking about real failures more. We started talking about like, you know, the lessons, like me just opening up right now, I was like, you know, I want to be humble. I want to be approachable. I want to be authentic. I wanna be congruent. Like the person that woke up this morning when I was by myself, I want to be the same person behind the microphone now. And it's not until, and this has been one of the things I've discovered, it's not until you even want that, that you began to manifest that. So I'd like to just hear your thoughts on what I just shared right now, 'cause I feel like we can unpack this for the audience, 'cause I guarantee the audience doesn't even know they're doing it.

Exactly, and I think it's bigger than, you know, I think it's like we're not cracking the code, I think, but a lot of people, so I hear it coming in a lot, and I think that I always say, marry to the process, divorce the outcome. So I never look at the outcome, but I look at the process, and I look at why I'm being called in, why I'm in those rooms, why am I feeling this way, why am I struggling with this, what internally internally is my relationship to it. And I think I obviously have a relationship to it, and I have an expectation and an outcome of how I need them to be.

Yeah.

And I thought, I just set myself up over and over again. And if I'm— if I say I don't judge anybody, that's not true, because I'm judging the fact that I have expectations of them showing up a certain way of integrity, and I don't anticipate— yeah, people of faith that are going to gossip and do all the things that, and I'm like, "Well, I didn't see that coming." Well, of course I did. And you know, and why would that be any different, that their struggles be any different? Because they're a Christian or they lead with more faith? I have anticipation that they will show up. And I think this would be the school of hard knocks, you know? What was, Scott M. Peck wrote the book, "The Road Less Traveled." The first line was, life is difficult.

Yeah.

And I think it continues to be difficult. There's an easy way and a hard way. I think I might make it harder than it needs to be because I may be struggling with the faith. I may be struggling with being an intuitive and being born an intuitive and being told, well, you can't be a woman of God and a woman of faith and a woman of that too, because Jessica Bell—

which is, by the way, completely anti-biblical. Right?

Yeah.

So from the start of creation all the way to current humanity, yeah, uh, there are people known as seers.

Yeah, that's what I—

right, there are people known as—

my website used to be called A Seer, and my mom said, you cannot be a Christian and do that. I'm like, yes I can. Wait, I can't. And I was in and out of my power, and it's just now that I'm saying, you know what, I have got to be led by—

I had a, um, I had a young man here, Chris Hendricks. I love him to death. Right, he's a singer-songwriter, amazing human. Um, I think he's going to do really, really well in the upcoming future. He struggled a lot. Um, he had— he was building a pretty massive music career, took off really quickly, then he had a daughter and decided to be a dad. Yeah, so he took a step back for that, started, you know, doing—

but isn't anybody that's doing really great and that really, really like lands and you can feel like the eagle landing, you can feel the power behind those, that we—

1000% has literally had to deconstruct maybe multiple Yeah, well, here's the cool thing about him. So he's born with cerebral palsy, so he struggles to walk, but he does, but he's a heck of a musician, right? And the reason I say that, so he said this one thing, he says, he goes, "I actually feel very blessed." I'm like, "Really?" He says this on the podcast, sitting right where you're sitting. He goes, "Yeah, I feel very blessed. I get to wear my scars on the outside." Right? And about that time, I actually saw two angels standing behind him for a glimpse. And I don't see that, I don't have, I don't see very often, I feel. Fairly regularly.

Well, you can walk into this house and you could— you— I mean, we're surrounded.

Yeah. So, you know, it's interesting, but what I guess— one of the things I'm trying to— I'm, I'm trying to be a bit of a bridge, and I'm not trying to be new agey or new sciencey or whatever, but when I look at science, I see fingerprints of God. When I look at unique giftings of humanity or different individuals, I see handprints of God, right? The source you're tapped into determines the outcome of the source that comes out of you. But even—

you are giving me goosebumps right now because I just told someone, they said Everything you just told me is, is biblical in the Bible. And I'm like, yeah, you can make it look any way, but it's the truth is the truth is the truth. And, you know, Joe Dispenza, I all— if you just blend them all—

Joe Dispenza, if in, in— if I said it in Christian terms, from biblical terms, it's called praying in the spirit.

Yeah, I mean, come on, we can make it work in any area if it's just how you receive it and what you— and what do you want to do with it?

What do you do? I believe that dog— dogmatism is is actually what prevents relationship. I'll get— give me— I'll give you—

oh, absolutely. Let's unpack that because that kind of— that's kind of like what we started this with. And it's that dogmatism. Yeah. That when I, I see that being spewed and I, and I— it's like the hook.

Yeah.

I believe it and then I get jerked around. I don't— and I don't dig it. I'm like, I don't dig that.

Yeah. So the unpacking for me would be, uh, I want to say the average statistic, and I don't have the exact statistic in front of me, but I want to say it's 90 91 to 95% of people remain in the faith or religion that they were born into. Thank you, correct. Okay, so they're, they're born into a belief system, whatever, right? But with inside of the belief system, a lot of times there is a structure system. So, uh, structure system in that, um, out— and I'm saying outside of faith component. So, right, Yeshua Jesus, for example, one of the things that he used to get mad about the most was the false presentation of what religion or faith was. Okay, so he used to pull the Pharisees and Sadducees apart constantly. They used to drive him nuts, like in an only way. And he was trying, 'cause it was like, your hearts are hard, you're not getting it. You don't have to take 5 steps guaranteed wearing a specific thing for me to love you. I already love you. Now, do I appreciate when you show me acts of obedience? Of course I do. I'm saying loosely, this is loose vernacular, if you will. But for me, part of my major transformation was, and I've shared this with the audience many times, 'cause I feel like this, as soon as I shut up here, we're gonna go really far, really fast, is this moment of what I call a presence practice. I did not have before. I would wake up, I would hit my coffee cup or my gym, my thing, my to-do list, I'd get after it, anxious, anxious. I call it anxious activity. Okay? You think because you're being active that you're being productive, and that's not the case.

Yeah.

Okay? During the season that you and I were talking offline about with myself and Henry and a few others that we know, like, and trust, and Henry Amarg was a huge part of my transformation. We did a 5-minute meditation one time, and out of that meditation, I come out, he says, "Just write." Right? I'm with a handful of, maybe 10 other people doing the same exercise. Later on, I did the same exercise in a moment of crisis, in a moment of need. I poured myself, I just poured my heart on a laptop, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right? I get to the bottom, my audience has heard this story before, but it's, and most of them are practicing this practice now, which is awesome. I get to the bottom of the document, I said, "Lord, if there's anything you wanna share with me, please share it with me now." Changed the font color to blue and it went, like I was typing so fast, I couldn't read it while I was typing and I was crying so hard, I couldn't see what I was typing.

Wow.

Okay. And that began a new process, what I call, what I hear you say is. So this morning, I went to sit and have my "What I hear you say is." So rather than talking, asking, projecting, it's like, "What do you have to say for me, to me?" And this is the only— normally I get like a paragraph or two, or sometimes I get pages, but this morning I got one phrase. Faith and fear cannot occupy the same space, time, or matter, or frequency at the same time.

Mm.

Right? So, fear is what drives the negative sides of all human activity and behavior.

Right.

Fear of not being enough, fear of not being seen, fear of not doing it right, not realizing that those are human constructs and not divine constructs.

Right. Fear of lack, fear of failure, all of it. Fear of what if. I think the fear of what if is so big.

Yeah.

You know, what if I fail? What if it's not enough? What if I don't— what if it doesn't work out? And so funny that you say that, because the one word I got today, and I, I think I put it out there in my stories, I did this little taping, I had like 10 minutes, I'm like, do a quick little download.

Yeah.

It was be present. Be so present in today that you can actually stay guided and connected to Source, where you are so grateful and so joyful. It is our our job to spark joy. It's our job to be generators. You know, we don't need a personality test or any of that to realize that we have to generate our lives and call in. And when we do that, we call in the vibration, the energy, all those things that sound new age, but it is true. It's all energy is that we call in these people because we're at the same frequency and we dig them and they dig us and we're like, hey, let's jam, let's work together, let's do all the things. Yeah, because it makes sense.

Yeah.

And, you know, I think that that right there, going back to our original, what I didn't want to talk about, was when someone comes in and sees people aligning and successful and they come in and might do a little bit of jibber jabber. And I talked about that this morning too, a little jibber jabber.

Yeah.

It's like, what do you get out of that?

Yeah.

And sometimes it works. Sometimes a one-liner that's saying, hey, be careful about aligning with him or her. And people are like, But it says a lot about them. I always tell people, it says a lot about them, not about the people that they're talking about, ever. But it has been probably what you said, "I'm carrying and I'm working through." And man, am I working through it.

Yeah, you know, Henry, our mutual friend Henry always says, "If you see it, you got it." Yeah. Like, so if you can see it in someone else, you actually have the same or similar traits.

He tell me, he looked at me first and he put his hand on my heart and he goes, "We got it." And I'm like, We got what, Henry? And then we took a picture and you could see in this picture, I'm gonna show it to you later, just pure beaming light. And I'm like, we didn't have light in that room like that. Where did that come from? But it was just the vibration of pure joy and connection.

Well, people forget that, all right, so even in scripture it says that the world was spoken into existence, right, essentially?

Yeah.

I'm not going Hebrew there, but. Yeah, better she in the beginning. Yeah, right. Um, the— what's interesting about that is when I speak and you speak, it's not the words that's being exposed, it's being— it's the frequency of the words that's creating the— like, if you were to watch a modulation, like, there's quiet, right? Flatline. We speak, modulation, that's frequency. Yeah, right. So to say that frequency is not part of this journey is absurd. Yeah, it's absurd. Uh, I'm a big, you know, I'm obviously I'm a follower of Yeshua in, in the, in the— but I, I believe in relation. Let me go back to this. One of the things that I see that— there's a couple of things. So first of all, when I, when I hear stories or, or feel or be part of, meaning I've been the, the instigator, right, or the receiver of incongruence, is values misalignment. In other words, I value honesty so much that when someone else is dishonest, it really rakes over my nerves.

Yeah.

Right. But I'll give myself a pass if I'm a little dishonest. Ah, you see what I'm saying? So it's like really becoming— I think attunement to congruence is actually seeing yourself with clear eyes.

Ooh, I love that.

Followed by the activity of embodying the thing that basically you want to transition from. One of the things that Henry taught me is like, love the sides of myself I want to resist.

Hmm. And Stephen, when you say with that goes, that this month in particular, I got really quiet and stepped back. It looked like I was really busy, but I was— there was a lot of downtime. Yeah, I did less Zoom, more time with Luca, my new grandson.

And you got to jam with grandkids. That was awesome. Oh yeah.

It's like I'm just jamming and bouncing and such a great connection. But there was something that made me— I mean, I wasn't anxious. I was grounded. And I think that everything I thought I needed to do, I didn't need to do. And there was nowhere I needed to be. There was nothing that I— and, and everyone's like, are you building? What are you doing? And I saw some things breaking apart, and I'm like, it's not to hijack Mel Robbins, but let them— let, let it, let it fall apart. It's not meant to be. I, I think this year, and we talked about it earlier, it Scotias, um, rebuilding and rebooting everything energetically. And I said it, people ask me, well, what do you think about 2026? I said, you really want to know? Everything is going to be restructured, every energetic—

almost all at the same time.

I mean, it's literally gonna, it's gonna shake your world up. You're going to think everything is falling apart, your business is falling apart. Let it. And this, this is an act of faith and trust where I think trust and faith are synonymous. And yeah, yeah, I have to have the faith and the trust that I let go of 26 clients in January. I mean, they just all happened to come up for— on contract at once. And I'm like, well, that's odd. But in traveling, and, and it just did. And I'm like, I am at such peace because I know what's coming is, is making space for something really big. So I'm going to trust now and be more excited now than ever. Yeah. Which feels amazing.

Yeah.

Still.

Yeah.

I'm still since January and I'm like, you're halfway over getting better and better all the time. Things are aligning, making sense. But boy, dropping into that, like, real trust of not flipping out, not sometimes the way you drop into that is to have the bottom drop out. Exactly. And you're just—

it's not trust by choice. Let's put it that way. Well, yeah.

And then there's the trust where things are still hanging on and you're like, Well, can I build from here? And am I meant to build from here? Asking the questions, am I where I need to be?

That's such a good question. Am I meant to build from here? And is it mine to carry?

Yeah.

Yeah, I was sharing with you some different stories offline about some of the things I've got in the background, different deals and things. And I'm like—

They're huge.

I was like, is this piece of that mine to carry? I don't think so. It's not my responsibility. This piece over here is a stewardship piece. That's mine to carry. That's my dad. One of the things I wanna touch on before we jump into some of the book content is one of the things I've been really striving to help leaders understand is it's not, from a perspective of priority, right? It's not business first, and then you get to apply your faith life. It's actually applying your faith into everything that you do.

Yeah.

Right? And as an entrepreneur who's built a massive organization, right? Not once, not twice, multiple times, but with different kinds of businesses, Calico being one of them.

Yeah.

Like, what have you seen? Because I feel like entrepreneurs and business leaders, whether they're faith-aligned or not, either way, it's like the 3D world is the most important thing they could possibly focus on. And then the other, the faith component, the relationship component, the presence practices, the authenticity, It's like we ignore this, but this, when done well, seems to support everything else. Tell me about your journey. Did you struggle like I did with, "Hey, company first, build the thing, make the thing"?

Oh yeah, oh yeah. Everything was about external validation. And I think that when we are attached to what people think about us, and I think there's a huge component with faith and about imposter syndrome. It can't connect. It just can't. When we're busy making sure everyone likes us, and if we're really connected to why did that happen and this happened, and we are the victim of everything— our business, our faith— we become— it just tumbles down. And every day we wake up and it's the same story. I wake up now and I look in the mirror. First thing I do after prayer time and quiet time in the morning is I look in the mirror and I'm like, hey Dana, what do you need from me today? And I get an answer. This is what I need from you. Are you able to show up for that. Are we able to show up, or are we gonna override that and decide we know better than our connection? Do we know better what needs to be done? Or can we listen to our faith and let that be a faith? We see so much out there right now, faith-led business, all the things, and you're looking at it, and sometimes I'm tipping my head. I have a pulled muscle. I tip my head as much as I can. And it's like, yeah, no, I don't feel it. And I'm not judging it, but boy, am I like— it's the stuff we said in the beginning. Hey, what do you— you asked me the question. What do you want to talk about that you don't talk about? I want to talk about the things that are out there that are— I'm watching and I'm thinking, I don't have to do anything. No, it's just— it's going to fall apart because it's not sustainable. And I want to build in this— I want to build a legacy that's sustainable. Cauliflower Foods. Was such a— I had so much excitement and creativity. I didn't know. I was learning on the fly. But I'm going to say imposter— not only imposter syndrome, I thought, you're not smart enough.

Mm-hmm.

You don't have a law degree. You better align with someone smarter than you. She's got a business degree. You better do it or you're never going anywhere with this. And that was my thought.

Mm-hmm.

That wasn't true. Yeah, but I'm not going to say any of it was a mistake. It was exactly the way it needed to be. You know, she took it on and did what she needed to do. Everything aligned.

Yeah.

For her, for me, the direction that I built out, it was exactly my directive.

Yeah.

And, and it's— if I fought that, resisted that, thought— I can't say I didn't grieve it. I did. And I can't say— and it would be a lie to say I wasn't angry. Of course I was.

Yeah.

When anything falls apart, we're like, come on now. I needed that win. And I think I needed that win. And I had to look at that too. What do I need?

And so it's interesting you mentioned that needing the win. I lived my life by needing the win until the last 2 years.

Yeah. And that win was not for me. It was for everyone to see that I was a winner.

Yeah.

Because I didn't feel— oh, I could cry over that one because I felt like I was such an imposter. It's like everything I did was built on a house of cards. And I would sell— and if I got there, I would say, wait a minute, that's not who you think I am. I'd set records that have been unbreakable. I have a garage full of Eagle plaques that, you know, the best of the best. And I'm like, what a fluke. I remember speaking for the first time, like, I can't help you. It just was a fluke. I don't know how I did it. And I look back on that and I think, wow, you were a genius at so many things. But you never claimed any of that.

You know what's really interesting? All right, so I'm gonna ask you a polar question on what you just said, 'cause I've shared that journey. There was no accolade that was enough. There was no influencer relationship that I held that was enough for the longest time, okay? Yeah. How critical were you when you did mess up?

Oh, I would self-sabotage to the degree that, the house, it was on fire.

Yeah.

It would be like, this is going too good.

Here's a grenade.

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

It's like, oh, what a fluke. You couldn't have gotten here on your— it's not going to last. Drop and roll and burn. I never even put the fire out. I made sure. And this is— this became a cycle that then I had to fight my way back to show everyone who I was. And then I'd be at the top again. I had to prove it. And then here comes the chaos and the energy. And it was crazy how angry I was too. And how I really was motivated by that anger.

Do you feel like you were, and this is me just unpacking, 'cause these are some of the things that you're saying, I've said to myself, felt myself, been to myself.

Yeah, oh, we have very similar synergies on that.

Yeah. I had several situations, like, I'll just, I'll say this phrase, I'll give you an example. I had several situations where I would do the same thing, create the sabotage, blah, blah, blah, and then I would be angry. And on the surface, I said, I'm angry at that person or that event. The reality was I was angry with myself.

Oh, yeah.

Like, for being so stupid and how— why wasn't I a better steward and all this kind of stuff.

But we never say that out loud. We're saying that internally. I think that the dialogue inside was, and I never wanted anyone to know. So we create these personas and we have these very successful lives. And it wouldn't take much to crack that egg, you know, only one comment. And this is where we can get really sensitive, someone saying, "They're not what you think they are." Yeah. And then it hits, it rubs up against that trauma's got to be here, that core wound is going to be your core fear the rest of your life. If you don't heal that core wound of trauma, of not being enough, you are going to cycle, cycle back again and again and again and again. And I think for me, I just had had enough. I said, I'm not doing this anymore. I had self-sabotaged so many times. And then the pinnacle was, you know, I think in the end it was a very long marriage where I found out, you know, I'm getting ready to, to like, if cauliflower foods wasn't enough, that, that loss broke my heart. And then I released that, rebuilt, and I'm rebuilding. But do you see, this is how divinely— had I not done the work, I wouldn't have been prepared for what was coming. Yeah, I would not have been prepared because that person was my rock. Yeah, but I needed another rock.

Yeah.

And I'm like, nope, this person— and I would say it all the time, this person is my rock, he's taking care of me, da da da. But, um, when that completely collapsed, you know, when he was a— I mean, literally the news came up one day, local practitioner, you know, um, uh, being arrested for sexual assault. I'm like, oh no. Oh, no, this cannot be true. But when all that unfolded and the truth really came out, I realized that I had to really lean in, not out. And I'm gonna say that was the real beginning of the deepest work I have ever done. I mean, I turned myself inside out. I mean, there are literally grief, gaining 80 pounds. I mean, building, making millions of dollars. Everything I did was not enough. Yeah, nothing made it better. I was hurting and grieving all the time. Grieving. And now I realize I can hold space for— there is parts of me that still grieve a 30-year marriage, and there's parts of me that feel really grateful and really joyful. And, and I'm so glad that we have a good connection, that I was able to heal. He was— I mean, it's, it's crazy because if you would have told me this a decade ago, hey, you're going to go through all of this and that's going to happen and this is going to happen and you're going to lose everything again. And I'm going to be, oh, no, no, no, that's not going to happen because I've set it up differently. Yeah. And so I think I've released any naysayers out there. People can talk. And I mean, I remember I was on a podcast show in LA and she sensationalized that the Misunderstood— oh, it was like, boom, sexual clickbait.

Let's go for the clicks.

Addiction. Boom. And I'm like, I had to actually shut my phone off for the weekend. I mean, it went like— and I'm like, I'm shutting my phone down. I felt my I was deregulated. I was shaking inside, and I'm like, this is a lot. I have to address it all, and it's the rest of my life I'm gonna deal with, you know, like you said, his scars are on the outside. You know, if I was wearing a dress today, the scars would be all over my legs of, um, of, you know, medication that I was given that, that literally almost killed me and was eating away my legs. And, and I was in so shame and married to a practitioner that I, I couldn't ask for help. Yeah, until I was in— I literally, I remember storming into the emergency room one day and saying, I need something done, like a one of those swabby things. And that is probably what saved my life. I had 17 forms of staph that was eating without oxygen. I mean, I literally almost lost my legs. They said, you'll be lucky to— and I'm like— and I told God at that moment, if you save my legs I will be in service forever. It doesn't mean I'm going to be perfect forever, but I'm going to be faithful enough.

There's no guarantee of perfect. So here's the one thing that—

Yeah, the perfection thing is out. It's out.

Hey there. I hope you're enjoying the episode. Look, I love making great content for you, but more importantly, we like creating great resources. So before we get you back in the episode, I want to make you aware of the Aligned Leader Index, which you can find at stephenscoggins.com/leadership. This is a one-of-a-kind tool that I wish I had when I was actually building and scaling my own organizations.

Why?

Because a lot of times the bottlenecks that we think are actually in our way are not really the bottlenecks that are actually in our way. And what the cool thing about this specific thing is, it's going to let you know what the number one constraint is internally, the number one driver that's actually in your way or being disrupted, or chaos and dysfunction are showing up. And number three, probably most important, where your leadership blind spot likely is. So if you're tired of your business actually running you and you want to take operational control over your organization, make sure you take complete advantage of the Aligned Leader Index. It takes 5 to 7 minutes and it'll give you instant clarification on the thing that's holding you back right now. Let's get back to the show. Second of all, I would say humanity is always going to be humanity.

Yeah.

Okay. And there's, uh, I was walking through a gas station this morning, matter of fact, on the way to gym. Um, I chose to work out in the gym versus the home gym here today just to kind of get on the road. And yeah, but as I'm walking through the gas station, there's a— there's some, you know, it's like 5, 5:30 in the morning, walk to the gas station. You know, there are, uh, people in the service-based businesses, which is where I— which is where my major businesses were created.

Yeah.

And I had this, this flashback, if you will, of walking in with dirty boots, dirty jeans, like kind of like a t-shirt, just like going through the motions, go get my caffeine, I'm going to work, I'm gonna. And I remember in those moments, I didn't feel like I had a lot of, I just didn't feel hope, right? So I was kind of like just going through the sleepy walk. And what I've discovered is, as interesting as that moment was, 'cause I got to, I was like watching that moment in somebody else's life. And I was thinking to myself, if they only knew, right? But then if I'm honest with myself, during some of my time in Utah, when I physically had things on paper, right? Had things. And audience heard me talk about a lot, so I'm not gonna, uh, talk too much about it. But you have, in theory, everything that you want, right? And I still found myself sleepwalking. Yeah, like, like, okay, well, I need to wake up and, and fire off this email. I need to talk to the CPA. I need to do this. It's just like a— it was a— it was all— life was always a task list. Right? And part of that journey for me has been understanding that the only way to transform is to walk into the forge willingly, right? And I know you believe wholeheartedly in what can be created in the fire. Have you found in your— even in your own life, your own business, because you've been very successful— like, we could talk business strategy, we could talk marketing, we could talk a lot of different things, right? But what I'd rather— what I'm trying to— what I'm trying to help the audience get with some of these newest— some of these newer shows is how important the inside you influences everything on the outside.

Everything, Stephen. That right there, it influences everything. And if I wasn't able to have grace, one word, grace, for my imperfections and what I think and the relationship I had with myself. Anytime I want to beat myself up, I have grace. Anytime I think I need to do more, I have grace. But I said to someone this morning, early on, I got a call this morning, someone being— I take sometimes emergency phone calls from clients and I'm like, hey, what can I do for you?

You.

And I said, listen, it isn't my blueprint you need, you know. I don't work and put out a blueprint. Yes, I've got an enormous amount that I built out because I love building out. It's your blueprint I'm looking at. It's your energy, your blueprint. I'm, I'm studying you and your rhythms of living. Yeah, don't study mine. Yeah, because that's not going to work.

Yeah.

And this is what we find out there, that, that it's this wash, rinse, repeat. It is not The success formula. Yeah. Everyone's different. Like we said, we both have ADHD, we're both dyslexic. I mean, it's like we were— look, I was looking at some of your stuff and I'm like, I'm left-handed. I can't do that. You're like, hey, there's a new thing you can do it up here. I'm like, I can? There's a new way?

And nobody has to watch your hand. You can just draw.

Yeah. And they're not going to see me write as a lobbyist writing contracts upside down. It was really quite impressive. No one even— it worked. It was terrific. Now it's like smears on the board. But I looked at that and I thought, I never gave myself grace, not for my size 12 feet, not for the scars on my legs. I hid them. It was on a boat with Amberly, and she was in a bikini. And I mean, I'm dying out there in the heat on the lake in Texas, and I'm not taking that jumpsuit off. And that was the first time I showed my legs, and because I felt safe enough. To, to, you know, we just sat there and cried.

Yeah.

And it makes me want to cry all over again because of the grace of finding the people that—

do you find that— let me cut you off.

No, you did, but because my brain is going—

my brain was going a thousand— it was going a thousand different directions. Even in those moments, um, one of the key principles, um, that I have used— so grace is unmerited favor. It's unmerited Like, it's— the grace is, it's something that's not deserved. It's something that is being given as a free gift. And at least that's my definition. And what I've discovered is, um, when I resist the sides of myself, whether it's physical, whether it's emotional, spiritual, when I resist sides of myself, yeah, um, there tends to be ongoing turmoil.

Oh yeah.

But when I'm able to sit with myself and give grace or love myself, that those components become integrated, and I don't actually have to go back and redo the work, 'cause—

Thank you. I mean, if we could like play that on repeat right there. You know, we were born in this world with two fears, fear of loud noises and the fear of falling. And being with Luca this week, he's 4 months old, loud noises make him hysterical. And the fear of— when I put him down too fast, he flipped out on me. And I realized, I say that a lot on keynotes, you know, because it's so true. Two things we come into the world with: the fear of loud noises, the fear of falling. Everything else we've integrated. All those 65,000 thoughts. We know our subconscious runs the show. We know the programs that we learn. We know all the basics. And I know people probably listening to the show know all the basics of what got us here. But if we can go back and put some things down, just what can you put down today? What can you do today? And I said this this morning, it's like, what's one thing you can do that you need to do that you don't do for you? And you are first cause. It's like my book, "Universal Laws," and I never thought I'd write about universal laws, and it's got tons of modalities in there, and I talk about God, but it's like, you're first cause. Everybody wants to put everyone else first. But you've got to come first, and then you can pay it forward. But if you don't, it's a house of cards. And I just called it a card of houses the other day on a show. And I'm like, oh, there's the dyslexia again. And I'm like, well, I hope people get that. I said house of cards, but I did say card of houses. And I'm like, hmm, I didn't catch that.

And it was intentional. Yeah, it was intentional. Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, I think one of the things— so, so we used to do a 3-day live event for— well, we probably did. We did it twice. We did once in 2019, then I had a business embezzlement reversal thing. We did it again in 2021., and, um, we used to call it Transform You. So Transform Your Life. So transform, letter U.

Love it, right? Love it.

And it was really interesting because when we were marketing the event, if the messaging basically said, let, let us show you how you're the bottleneck, right? Let's, let us, let us show you, um, in the most loving way possible, how you're the bottleneck, you're the problem. You think all these other things are the problem, but you're really the problem, right? That you're the problem that's creating the other problems, the self-worth, self-sabotage, that sort of stuff. What I discovered in that moment was people don't want to admit that they have work to do. People love saying they have work to do.

Yeah, they're the problem.

But very seldom say, I think I have work to do.

That was the catalyst when you just said that just now, when everything changed for me, even with cauliflower foods. I had work to do. I was in trauma. I was unhealed. Everything I set up in my life was geared to fail. It just was. And until I really healed that core wound, which was abandonment, self-worth, love— oh, I mean, I could layer it up. I could go into traumas and alcoholic fathers and all the things. It's in my book. But until I really loved Dana, and I mean really loved her, all the versions of me, the 6-year-old, the 10-year-old, the 12-year-old, the 30-year-old, the one that made big mistakes, the one that didn't know enough, the sabotage, all of them. It wasn't going to work. Yeah, I had to integrate all of them. So now when people think they have an emergency and their house is on fire, and I'm like, is it really on fire? Or could you just walk away and, and like do one of those little spray things, you know. And, and, but when the chaos comes, the sky is falling all the time energy, that, that's chaos to distract you from what you don't want to feel.

Yeah. And if you're always the source, the source can't work in your life.

Yeah. I, I, I'm always looking at me, hey, what do I need to know about this? What do I— hey, if I've got a huge tax bill, I'm always like, well, I'm really grateful for that because I made more money than I thought, than I thought.

I haven't gotten that far yet.

California, so it's a little bit different.

Yeah, yours is stronger than mine.

So, but yeah, it's always like, what do I need to know? Yeah, because it doesn't matter what anyone else knows about me, it's what do I need to know. Yeah. In order to live this life and hold space. And I think we're always going to hold space and grieve versions of us.

Yeah.

And then the older we get, and I think, I don't know if it's any different for women than it is for men, that we grieve these versions of us that we're losing.

Well, men are just, men are, from my, my experience so far, men are they're scared to take a look because they have to admit that they're, they're invaluable. Yeah, right. They're perhaps— yeah, well, women, um, my experience has been so far, because of their intuitive nature, yeah, they can sense misalignment a lot earlier, whether we listen to it or not.

The second-guessing.

Yeah, that's, that's a difference.

And you know, and there's my book, The Truth Within the Lie. I second-guessed everything because I couldn't trust —yeah—that I saw what I saw, knew what I knew. How could I? Because I had in my mind, well, if you were smart enough, you would have had that law degree, you would have done this and this and this. And then it was almost like the Wizard of Oz, you know, when they got all the degrees and they just— and it felt like that. And it feels like that now. It's like, I never needed any of that. All I need— I was, I was, I already, I was already there. I, I want people to know sooner than later, yeah, that you've, you've got what it takes. Enough. You're already enough. You're born enough. You were born— yeah, exactly. You were born worthy. And that you have everything you need, and the blueprint is you. And with a good mentor like you and the programs you're building, is you lean into that and then you step in, and they understand where you are and they build around that so they can be of service to you. Yeah. But so much we've seen, and we talked about this a little bit, was so much out there is not of service. It was about people making a lot of money and putting people through blueprints, and they're spit-in spit-out, and they're almost traumatized. Yeah, like I didn't get—

it's broken trust is what it is.

Yeah, and I didn't get what I needed, and I spent all that money, and they didn't show up for me, and like they didn't make—

they didn't even make their call. And yeah, exactly, I've experienced that. I've spent tens of thousands of dollars on different things. That's probably why I'm even more sensitive to it now. So yeah, when people are engaging with whatever we're doing at whatever level they're doing it, I'm like, team, show up. Stephen, show up. Yeah, you know, we've got a 3-day masterclass we start tomorrow virtually here from the studio downstairs. And we've got a lot of people registered for it, right? But as you know, doing events, you might have a lot of people registered, there may be a lot of people show up. Yeah. Or a handful of people show up and you don't know, right? But I committed to God a long time ago, is if you've called me to this work, one or none, I'm coming. Yeah. One or none, I'm coming.

I can't believe you said that because I just had something called the community that we launched and I think I think 5 people showed up there. I thought 500 were going to show up. 5 showed up. And I'm like, okay, it doesn't matter if one— I don't care if no one showed up. I was still going to go through the taping as if I was speaking to everyone. If I walk into a room and there's 15 people or 50, or there's someone just got very anxious and said, I only have 12 people and I'm so sorry. I said, listen, you hired me. I'm going to show up as if there's 10,000 people in that room. I'm going to pour everything into that. And I feel that way no matter what I do.

Yeah, I mean, I think I think it really has to be that way. I was even thinking recently that, you know, one of the— we get a lot of messages on there, is there going to be a replay? Is there going to be a replay? Which means I don't want— I want the information, but I don't want to show up because I don't want to be sold, is what is really what the dynamic is really happening. Yeah. And, um, you know, so we've, uh, like instinctively stopped selling anything on these live trainings. We build trainings. If they want to book a call or find out how we can help them, we book a call. Um, and we've done that because we don't want to be the resistance to the solution that they actually need. I love that, you know, because we know we can provide the service, we know we can provide the solution, we know we're here to help. But until they experience that desire, that sincere desire, showing up when it's big, when it's small, when it's all the things, right?

Yeah. And I know we both are experiencing this this year. Everyone feels sold. And, you know, who was it? Not Ed Mylett, it was, um, Rene Rogers said to me, he said, you know, Dana, it's, it's not selling. If, if you have a service— and I remember him being on my show and, and us having a conversation afterwards and him saying, you know, I, I want to be— you need— if you have a service and people need it, you show up and, and you offer it. And because so many people have an aversion to selling, I've never felt like I was selling. It's if people are on my radar and I know they need my service, I don't care if it's a year or 5 years they're on my radar. I, I, I'm not attached attach to that outcome. When the time is right, it's, it's the right time. Yeah. But I do believe if we have a service, we need to put it out there. The selling part of it, yeah, this year is different. It, it has to— I love the fact you just said, yeah, we're showing up, we're giving, and we're not, we're not attaching, because it's that attachment that everyone's ready for. Yeah. And, and then they're real. Yeah, they want real.

They don't mind it. My experience so far, and I'm, I'm this way Yeah, I don't mind investing if I know it's real. Yeah. And, you know, if I— and if it's a bigger program, then I'll figure, you know, that.

But if it's real, they're going to dig a little bit deeper. They're going to look at your website. They're going to see what you have to offer. They're going to look for you. It's not going to be in that moment where they get something and they're going to be, oh, he sold me. They're going to say, I love that. Let me look for more. Yeah. And I believe that that is the tale. I feel like that's the trust economy.

Economy. Right now we have the distrust economy. Boy, don't we though. Yeah, and we're moving towards the other. One of the things I want to mention real fast, I'm gonna definitely hit the— hit a little more, um, spend more time on the book because I, one, I just love the title, The Truth Within the Lie, because 9 times out of 10 the thing that's keeping you is there is a hidden truth that you're refusing to look at. So I'm excited to get back into that. But yeah, um, one of the things that you mentioned was this, um, unworthiness stuff. So it was probably 5 years ago Rory Vaden was interviewing me on their podcast at the time. They've since rebranded it. Him and AJ do it now together. And he, out of the— somewhere in the middle, like, he asked me this question about, you know, what prevented you from getting up, you know, building your per— I think at the time was like building your personal brand first, because they were heavily focused on helping thought leaders build brands. And out of my, out of my lips, without thinking, my, like, what do they call it, the Freudian slip was, yeah, I didn't know if I was worthy of a voice. All right, now listen, I'm gonna fast forward and connect that to this next statement because I've, I've, I spent a lot of noodle. I sat on that for a while. I really sat with that. Um, recently, um, you know, we— there's been a book in the making of a new book of mine come in the making for the better part of 2 years, right? Yeah. Um, and I was having— I was— it's funny, some of the stuff that's in the new book, well, the stuff I was living, right, and 2 years ago, a year ago, um, nothing that's harmful or hurtful anybody, of course, but But what's really interesting about that is I went to my book agent who's a good friend of mine. She's done a lot of really wonderful books, Nina. And we went and hired a professional to help me kind of put together the book proposal, right? Because we want to go traditional publishing this time. Okay. Yeah. And what's interesting about that is my first book, I hired a ghostwriter to help me write the whole thing because I was ADHD, I was dyslexic and all the things. And I remember him coming to me, he was like, dude, there's no way these stories are true. Like, what are you talking about? He's like, I need to go interview everybody. I'm like, well, knock yourself out. Like, he's like, he came back, I can't believe all this is true. But I went to, when we officially signed with the publisher, it's being distributed, being distributed through Simon Schuster, which I'm excited about. Wow. Um, congratulations. My main contact Matt, um, who I was talking to, uh, I went to him, he's like, you go, Stephen, I've, I've read your raw work, you don't need a ghostwriter. I'm like, but I'm ADHD, I'm dyslexic. He's like, I'm just telling you right now, because I'm just telling you right now, you don't need a ghostwriter. Yeah, right. And he was, you know, one of the— there was a, you know, when you do a book proposal, one of the things that happens is you put a chapter, a sample chapter, a completely written chapter in there. And I had to go back on two separate occasions. This, right, and the rest of it was dialed in, it was great, but I'll do it on the, on the sample chapter because it was missing me. It was missing my heart, right? So I rewrote the entire sample chapter, and that's actually what we submitted. And Matt was like, you don't need a ghostwriter, dude. He goes, just trust me. The, the, you know, $50,000 you're going to spend in having a top-rated ghostwriter, because we're going to make a run at it. Yeah. And stuff. And so when you're talking about like worth issues, I'm like, damn it, I'm still dealing with it from time to time. Yeah. So I went and I, I did. We— I went and wrote the whole thing. Um, uh, Nina's read it and she's like, oh my gosh, we've shared it with 3 or 4 people from our community. They're like, when's it coming out? I want 100 copies. I'm not kidding.

So you say that with— and with my book, I did a hybrid with Game Changer Publishing. And what I did was I wanted to own the book, and, you know, I had Hay House, and I'm like, uh, and I, you know, was born on Louise Hay's birthday, and I thought there were so many signs, but I'm like, I want to own this book. And so I went another way, but I said, I, I don't want to write it. I'm— I write upside down and backwards. It hurts my shoulder. I'm like, the book is never gonna get written if I do it. And then fast forward, she goes, we got a way you can do it. And I just channeled it. She goes, just start talking, Dana. And I'm like, well, that's one thing I can do. I can do that really well. And actually they said, where did this come from? Is that Latin? Is that Hebrew? I'm like, I don't know. And they did the research and I said, I've never read that. But it was crazy, the stuff that came through. But it did get published. I thought a writer would come in, all the editors would fix all of my reverse everything. Reverse engineering. Uh-uh, reverse engineering. I love that. Nope. It went out exactly. I mean, there were some—

Which is probably why it's been so successful.

It just keeps going there because they just can't believe all the mistakes and that I— And so it went out and they're like, oh, it went out unedited. We want to pull it. And I'm like, I'm like, sorry, already number one. And I feel intuitively guided to teach— if I'm going to say everything is perfectly imperfect and I'm going to let people be authentic, I'm going to let the book go. Yeah. And it just— it— yeah, I got number one in 11 categories and just kept going. And I'm like, it's a little book that could—

that's still a little book that could. And it's like—

and I'm like, don't let me do a reading because I sometimes— I pick— I try not to pick it up and read it because it's like, oh, what are some of the stories you're getting from the That's incredibly authentic that they thank me for being so— In fact, the last book signing, what blew me away is that we didn't take pictures of people in line or signing books or anything glamorous. We took pictures of people sobbing and crying and saying, "Hey, I—" It was like we talked about before. "I found you on something that you gave away." and I looked up everywhere and I— on YouTube and Shorts, and I read your book. He goes, do you remember me? And he go— I said, I'm sorry, I don't. He goes, I met you in a restaurant and you told me to have faith. And I said, I did? Because we're at a sushi bar, we're at— and he goes, and you were with that— and I had my best friend walking with flowers for my book signing. It just happened to me. And he goes, and you were with her. And I'm like, wow. Yeah. Wow. And he goes, you changed my life. I'm sober. And I'm like, my book did that. And he goes, "You—" And then it was one after another. So that day wasn't about like, "Oh, what a great book, so well-written and so pristine." It was about how people came in and crying about how it touched them. And they felt that my imperfection and showing up that way gave them permission to show up that way too. That they had this image of me that was gonna be quite different than number one, what they read, and how it was written. And I'm like, wow. So there it goes back to the everything is perfectly aligned. It was meant to go out like that. Because if I can change that many lives in that one book signing— yeah. And yeah, and 3 people are sober because of that— wow, my, my job is done. Yeah. You know, it's like, wow.

I don't— we're just beginning. Yeah.

You know, maybe the next book could be a little more glam. I'll do it, but they can edit it a little better.

One of the things that I'm— the best books on the planet, I feel, are— they're not written. They're called in to be written. Like, for example, the book that I'm working on, I felt it was— I felt called, like it called me to it. And I sensed that your book did the same thing. What was it about Truth Within the Lies called you to it specifically? Why was it— in other words, why was it a book that had to be written in a market that's largely saturated with books in general?

You know, I never pay attention to a saturated market. You know, they say 85,000 coaches out there and da da da. I never pay attention to anyone, but I stay in my own lane, and I am very good at staying in my own lane. Um, I think we all have our own genius, and I think the Latins believe that, and I believe said they're a genius for saying that. And I think we all have genius in us. But I think the book had to be written because so many of us create stories. And I had no idea how our subconscious was so powerful and that we believe those stories and that we, we often believe what our mind tells us, and it's just not true. Yeah. And so I tell 14 stories. I do 14 universal laws of abundance, of the law of Surrender. All the things that I think are my top— the law of cause and effect. How I'm looking at the water that we're looking at, and I thought if I dropped a little pebble out there, I would watch that water go and go and go until it merged into and became part of everything. I think that we're not so separate from anything. Like we said, we are not even 1 degree away by a dozen people or more. And it's— I don't believe in 6 degrees of separation. I don't even think we are 1 degree of separation. Yeah. And I think people that think that you're alone doing this, well, you got to reboot that because we are never alone. We're really connected to the divine and we're connected to our stories. But please challenge those. I think that had to be written because I wanted people to see what their image of me was. And it's crazy what— I'm like, really? That's why you didn't approach me? Or you think that— it's not the truth. And the truth is, this is who I am. This is what I believe to be true. I believe the medicine was saving me from an illness and it was killing me. Yeah. And it wasn't until I challenged that, and that was the truth, that my first truth was really challenging medicine. I really believe it's coming from doctors. I've never done an illegal drug in my life. I've never drank alcohol socially. I mean, I am literally the poster child for like good girl. And then they give me a prescription, and then I'm deemed a drug addict and this, and I'm like, but they— it's legal and they gave it to me. And, and then there's— it gets very blurred. You know, around why I'm taking it. And then I have to address the emotional stuff. And I fought like a mad dog in a cage, a rabid dog. I did, because the shame almost killed me that I had to deal with my daughters and their version of what their truth was. And I'd say, well, that's not true. That's not true. Here's the truth. Here's the truth. Well, the truth is now in this healed version of me, I can hold space for their truth. You can't hold space for anyone's truth if you're unhealed. Yeah, you're going to resist and you're going to say that's not true. You're going to push back and you're going to give your own narrative. I have no narrative. The fact is, did it, done it, been there. And what can I do to be of service? And, and I hold space, you know. I just spent a month with my daughter and our relationship has changed. I, I didn't know. I, I dedicated the book to them. Yeah, I didn't know if they could forgive me. And for the years, because is the pendulum swung, Stephen. I, I thought I was a great mom. I showed up for everything. I was doing beautiful home, beautiful meals, beautiful— I mean, a chef, doing all the right things, room mother. But the secret was— and I believe secrets will kill you, kill your dreams, kill everything— yeah, nobody knew. They knew I had migraines. They had no idea to the degree of how sick I was and the degree of how much medicine I was taking. Yeah. And I think it wouldn't have happened without a good codependent. And like anything, someone taking care of me and protecting me and me hiding behind that and blaming them for everything. I had to be accountable. Yeah. I had to say, hey, at some point I blurred the lines and I did this and I have to live with this. And every day I have to live with me. At the end of the day, we have to live with us, not our mentors or people that inspire us. At the end of the day, It is me and I wake up to me. That's why I say in the first thing in the morning, what do you need from me today, Dana? What do you need? And it's like, I've got to answer that truthfully. Yeah. Not, not from the ego standpoint where it wants to contract and divide and separate and judge. That is my ego showing up and it wants to blame. It loves the blame game. But, but here the heart center just wants to expand and hold space and say, hey, this is the truth. And there's so much freedom in that.

So much freedom in that. Well, before we get to the last question, where can I get the book? What's the best place for people to get the book?

Well, it's in Barnes Noble. You can get it anywhere and order it anywhere, um, but I would say Amazon's the quickest. Yeah, you know, I know a lot of people aren't Amazon buffs, but yeah, Amazon is there. It's just getting ready to be released. In fact, I just saw this morning we're in the last, uh, like listening to— I was going to tape it myself, but it's taken almost— it's like I just can't do it. I but I can't find the time to do it. And it's like I reverse the sentences even more than they're already done. And I'm like, let's just hire—

Oh, this is missing. Let me say this. Yeah, so it's gonna go out. Let me re-edit the book right now.

Exactly, so the audio will be out by the end of the month too, so. That's awesome. Yeah. So good.

Well, one of the things that I'm seeing, one of the things that was part of my journey, I'm seeing leaders continue to struggle with, is understanding what the ego's responsibility is versus what the soul's responsibility is.— or what the soul's searching for versus what the ego's searching for. And I was hoping you could unpack that a little bit for us, for how you see it.

Wow, what a really powerful question. And I think this is where we, we get tripped up. The ego is there to protect, and it, it does its job. But at some point, we have to acknowledge when it's doing harm. And usually when our life, like you said, it's bottom's falling out, everything, and we're fighting for the, you know, to hang on. And, you know, allow the truth to come in. And that's usually very heart-centered, very— that it's a soul that just wants to expand. It just wants to hold space and have grace, all the things that feel kind of warm and fuzzy. And that's a good— I've never said warm and fuzzy before, but it kind of feels like that. I woke up this morning feeling so grounded, so safe, so in my power. But my ego doesn't feel like that. Yeah, it wants to show up and drive harder. I, I'm— I can be— tend to be a workaholic. I'm overly driven. And people think I'm super competitive. I'm like, I'm not competitive in my own lane, but I can be really narrow in that. And I think the soul just wants to stay really expansive, and it wants to pay closer attention to what, what is of service. Ego's not interested in service except for one thing: to the subconscious. Yeah, the ego is going to serve the subconscious and the stories and run you through that maze like you've never— and it's like let's start over, let's do it again, let's get a different outcome. And I think the question is, the ego is devoted to getting a different outcome from the same story. The soul wants to understand.

Which is why people, including ourselves, have gone through the process. Yeah. Why is this event happening again? Well, because nothing really changed. And again.

And how many people have said, man, it feels like Groundhog's Day? How many people that come into your masterclass, it's like, it's Groundhog's Day here.

It's one thing that I've heard say that I that I've heard before is like, um, you'll keep taking the same test until you pass it. Yeah. And God operates with that. God is not— God is not interested in our wealth. He's not interested in our influence. Um, he's interested in our growth. Yeah, right. So, um, I know I would— it was more of a— the way in which it's typically presented is more New Age than not. Yeah. But it's, it's also biblical, which is God is interested in the raising of the conscious within the person. Absolutely. And I look at it as how much am I actually embodying what I see in Christ, right? What attributes am I embodying? And I think we get lost in, I call myself this title because—

My ego needs something out of that. And you know what's so interesting? If our ego is really attached to that, we're going to draw people in that want an outcome that's attached to that too. And I've recently just had someone I've had to— I've not fired a lot of clients, but she is so attached to her story and cannot bridge. There's nothing I can say to bridge that trust. And it's me. Now she's focused on me and delivering, fixing her. And I'm like, where along the way Yeah, did I over— maybe I, I had to assess. Yeah, am I over-delivering? Am I trying to fix? Have I stepped into some fix-it energy? Have I stepped into some seer energy? And did I go ahead and come back and try to unpack it?

I found myself trying to solve other people's problems on their behalf.

Exactly.

And I was like, stop doing that, you're getting in my way.

Well, exactly. And that's what I was doing. And I said, listen, I am, I am in the way here, and I, I need to release you because you you have things to do in the world, and this is— we don't have alignment here. There's a lot of struggle here. It shouldn't be struggle. Yeah. And, um, yeah, well, you and I can jam for hours.

I think we're gonna do a couple more hours for fun. Yeah. Um, but I know I need to get you out of here on the time, time constraints and all the things. But, uh, I, first of all, I just enjoyed this conversation. Um, me too. It's, it's not often— and, you know, we've, we've had a lot of folks on that are, you know, very successful as you have been in business, and they don't want to talk about the real stuff. They want to talk about business. Yeah, right. They just want to talk about the strategies and the techniques and the 5 formulas and the 16 secrets. Yeah. And on the other hand, we're not wired that way. No, we're, we're, we're, we're—

we want to share, we want to be vulnerable. And that is not where the success really— and this, it is just not where it's deriving from. It's got to come from the soul-centered source. Yeah. And then the rest expands where you can hold space for it.

See, that's the difference. Ego, ego shrinks, it could—

soul expands. Yeah, yeah. Ego, ego contracts and soul expands. And the playing field of where we put all our spiritual seeds has to be there on that playing field. And that can't be the stories that we create.

Oh my gosh, this has been so good. Dana, thank you so much for joining me. I adore you. I love it.

Oh, we said that and an osprey, look at that. There we go.

Look at that. I think it's Oswald. You got Oswald and Olivia out there.

Yeah, flying by. It was a signal that alignment. That's right. Beautiful, beautiful.

Well, thank you again. Thank you. Hey guys, that's gonna wrap up this episode of One Part Lion, One Part Lamb. As you know, we want to see you rising and last. Could you do us a favor? I'm sure you heard something in this episode that is highly valuable to yourself or someone you love, someone you care about, a business leader. Share the episode. Say, hey, look, I really thought of you. You popped in my mind. I really think you'd enjoy this episode. I think when we do that, we're actually creating that ripple effect that Dana mentioned in the episode, and I want to be an active part of that. So would you do me a favor? Would you please like, share, share, uh, subscribe, do all the things. I, I, I'm like everybody else, I hate asking, honestly. But the reality is, is over 60% of you watch the show and have yet to subscribe. And the way to know that is you can look at the button that says subscribe, or does it say subscribe, so with a D or without a D, and that tells you whether or not you're subscribed. Now, we love you, we're always praying for you, we want to see you win. So please like, share, comment. Until then, I will see you on the next episode. God bless, take care, peace.