Health Hacks from an Elite Entrepreneur and Celebrity | Lorayne Michaels

It doesn't matter how big you build your business or how successful you are, if something happens because you neglected your health, you're useless. Successful women is. They are so busy serving, they're so busy building. They're so busy. You know, they have this big vision, this big dream.

I'm a big believer that preventative care is always better than reactive care.

Oh, 100%. Your mood shapes like, you move your body, you move your mood. Health and fitness pretty much saved my life. I fell into it because of really toxic relationship and low self worth, and I was just at the lowest of lows. It really changed the game mentally.

Hey, guys, welcome back to Bill, where we help you rise, lead and last. Stephen Scoggins. As always your host. I'm super duper excited. I've been working really hard behind the scenes to find people that are actually making lasting impact, real life change. And. And a lot of that has to do with this functional medicine, slash functional nutrition, slash functional health space. And so I've been bringing you guys a lot of thought leaders that are really elevating that standard, including our elite professional and celebrity trainer, Ms. Lorraine Michaels. How are you doing?

Fantastic. How are you?

I'm stoked. I'm excited to see you, dude.

I'm so stoked to be here. It's beautiful. Like, I love it.

Yeah. I told everybody Safe Haven was coming. Safe Haven was coming. And I was like, nobody's listening. Nobody's listening. Like, no, they're listening. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was funny. I actually had the. I'm a big. I'm big into harmonic or frequency. And harmonics all played frequency music along with worship music and all kinds of stuff. And this morning, when Quest, our producer, got here, we were, you know, we were. He was fine. He was fine tuning the setup and stuff like that because, you know, we. We set it up night before. I say we. He set it up, Set it up. Let me be honest. I like, I'm contributing in areas I'm not contributing to. But no, he. We got here and this morning, I had the free. And it was funny. The water that you're seeing right now, it moves like this constantly, but it was actually in sync with the music that was playing in the house. It was so stinking cool.

That's so cool.

So surreal. But anyway, all right, I love it. I'm excited to talk to you. Okay. One of the things I'm excited to do with. With the folks that I bring on the show nowadays is I know that the folks I bring on the show Are serious about their craft, they're serious about service and they're serious about other helping other people become successful in areas where in many cases so far my thought leader friends used to struggle which is how they became aware of the thing they need to change and so on and so forth.

Yeah.

So before we jump into your amazing curriculums and your fitness and fitness training and how you show up nutrition wise and everything, the future of the armor up, like show up for you service. Before we jump into all that, what I want everybody to know is I want them to know a little bit more about you. How did you become so passionate about fitness? Why do you show up the way you do? Why are you so committed to your clients?

Because health and fitness pretty much saved my life. Jesus first, yes, absolutely saved me. But health and fitness is really what pushed me. I fell into it because of a really toxic relationship and low self worth and I was just at the lowest of lows and that's how I found fitness. And it really changed the game mentally and then it just snowballed from there. My mental health, obviously my physical health and then habits started changing. So I'm super duper passionate about it because I was very unhealthy mentally and physically and it changed everything for me.

Yeah, I think one of the things that's interesting about watching you because I've obviously I got to know you a couple years ago and, and then I guess we've been watching each other from afar and we know a lot of the same people and stuff like that, which is awesome.

Is one of the things that you and I resonate on. In fact, a lot of the guests I've had on recently is I believe in building your life from the inside out. Right now for me, fitness helped me reduce my overall stress level, especially building a business or multiple businesses at one time, large teams trying to scale all those things. And I found myself gaining weight rapidly. I found myself kind of, I would call it self abandoning of sorts. Like I was putting everybody else first. I'll come home and get depleted, then I would get depleted, then I would be tired, then I wouldn't want to get up next morning and do the thing like talk to me a little about the, the importance of understanding how your physiology shapes your psychology.

Your mood shapes. Like you move your body, you move your mood. Right. And so like you're saying you get into this cycle of you didn't feel good, you didn't want to do it, you worked so hard, you come home, you don't feel like doing It. And then. So you don't feel like doing it, then you don't. Then you feel bad for not doing it. And it's just this cyclical event that happens, and you end up in a place of you're unhealthy, you have to work out or something has to happen that's going to make you do it. And so literally, if you move your body, you move your mood. And so I am so big on that. Sometimes I work with women who are so depressed, they don't know where to start. They don't know what to do. And they're so used to putting everyone first. My first step is get outside.

Yeah.

And just start walking.

Yeah.

And start journaling. And so it's that physical aspect of it that helps you mentally. And then we work from there, we build from there.

What I find is really interesting is.

The emotional feelings that otherwise influence the daily decision. So you just mentioned, essentially, guilt and shame and condemnation.

Yep.

Most of us will not talk to other people the way we talk to ourselves.

Oh, yeah.

You know, walk me through maybe some simple shifts to begin to work and push past the guilt and shame modalities. Because especially if there's a toxic relationship or environment, normal, normally someone is trying to remind you of the worth you don't have. Even though that's a lie.

Yeah. Yeah.

My biggest thing is my faith. And so when I get into that toxic tape that I'm constantly replaying, Right. I'm berating myself, I'm reminding myself of all the mistakes that I've made, Right. I bring it back to my faith and I get in the Word and I remember and I read. What does God say about me? Who does God say I am? And then I start from there. And that's what I have to remember is those promises, those truths. Because you're gonna hear whispers throughout your whole entire life. You're gonna hear the whisper of the Lord, and you're gonna hear the whisper of the enemy. And sometimes the enemy gonna sound like the Lord. He's gonna twist the truth. But you have to lean into one. And you gotta lean into the truth of God. Right? Because that's gonna start changing the way that you see things, the way that you see yourself. Something that I had to start practicing was telling myself that I love myself because I didn't hear it.

Yeah.

And it is so weird and corny.

It feels weird. But I'd say the first time I ever did it in front of a mirror, I wept. I wept.

Yeah. Yeah. It's weird. It's weird, right? And you get through a couple of them and then you feel it. And then like you're literally locking eyes with yourself, telling yourself you love yourself. And you're like, oh my God.

Our mutual friend Ken Johnson's like, he gets, he, he actually goes even extra. He goes, I love you, bro. Like, you're so awesome. You're so cool. I'm like, I don't know, bro, if that might be a little bit too much programming.

I heard him say that he does that too.

No, but I agree. I mean, it's definitely something like that. The other thing that I think is interesting is the more six and this is leaders in general, but I see this a lot with female entrepreneurs and business leaders as well. The more successful you become, the less you put emphasis on taking care of yourself.

100.

Right. So walk me through. Like, I know you got higher profile clients and things of that nature from time to time. And you obviously, you work with a lot of different people. But what is it about the higher profile clients that.

I don't know, has, has the biggest shift in understanding? Kind of like why, why do they. I guess why do, why do they. Why do they not care or not say not. I'm going to be rude. I'm saying the question wrong.

Right.

Why did they not take it seriously? Necessitates the extra need.

Yeah, I love that question. Because that's what I see so much with successful women is they are so busy serving, they're so busy building. They're so busy. You know, they have this big vision, this big dream. I work with a couple of functional medicine practitioners right now, and they're so focused on helping other people get to the root of their problems and building their business and their overhead in this. And all, you know, all the things you're, you're an entrepreneur, they forget about taking the time for them. And then it's not until, like I mentioned it before, it's not until you have to. It's not until something happens to where you're unable. And that's what I tell my clients is don't put it off to where you have to do something about it. Do it now because you're useless. It doesn't matter how big you build your business or how successful you are, if you're unhealthy, if you get sick, if something happens because you neglected your health, you don't want to get to that point because you're useless. So let's take care of that now. Let's find that joy now. And when we do start doing this because I know how much of a high I get when I'm working out and I'm physically fit and I'm eating right. I know, right, right, exactly. Like I know how good I feel. And that's just gonna make my business better.

Yeah.

That's just gonna make it even more successful. And you are gonna radiate that. And it's just a ripple effect. No matter who you are, if you're a mom, a business, what. When you feel that good, you show up so much better and it just ripples out to everyone else.

That's so good. I had me thinking too. I'm a big believer that preventative care is always better than reactive care.

Oh, 100.

Right. Reactive care. It takes three times the amount of money, three times the amount of effort, three times the amount of, like looking yourself in the mirror, so to speak. Like really kind of like becoming really responsible and accountable.

Yeah.

For the decisions that we could have made. So I'll give you an example. And I think this is reflective for both men and women.

Steve Myrick, my old man Myrick, the guy that gave me a second chance, I didn't deserve 2003. I had been in business for myself about.

Three and a half, almost four years by that time. Still very much early stage. Like I was very much not a million dollar earner. It was very much like I might have. I might have made top line. Okay, so I'm out, invoiced out 100, 150, $200,000. Right. I had a lot to learn still.

Yeah.

I really wish Steve could have seen what, what came out of his investment. Me, honestly. And I pray that he does when he sees me invest in other people. But we'll see what happens when I get to heaven.

Yeah.

But one of the things that happened was, is I remember this like it was clockwell. We go to the hospital. He had both knees replaced. And while in the hospital, he developed pneumonia.

Oh, gosh.

Right. So he wasn't able to get up and actually walk. So the, the knee replacement was gonna. Was gonna take twice as long.

Yeah.

And the pneumonia got worse. Yeah. So my father and I go see him in the hospital. And this, this is, I think this plays into very much what. One of the reasons why this functional medicine component is so vitally important to help mind, body, soul, which I know you believe in deeply. Steve. My dad's doting over Steve and he's like, hey, you, you're a multi millionaire. You own all these properties. You've been all These amazing places. You. You know, you can do in this. You could do, like, he was just like, you have it all.

Yeah.

Right. Never forget this. Steve takes the mask off his face because he was on, like, an oxygen machine, because they're obviously treating his. Treating his lungs and takes and literally looks at my dad and says, what good is all that when I have no health? And put the mask back on his face and just stared at the ceiling. He passed away about two weeks later, unfortunately, from pneumonia. But.

That has always stuck with me. So people ask me a lot of times, like, well, you know, because part of. I guess you would call it, it's. It's not even part of my brand. It's part of my lifestyle.

Yeah.

Like, I get up, I do my mantras. I do my journaling. I walk on the grass. I get centered, I get present. All this is, like, part of my life. You know, it's only been there a year, which apparently people around me are like, welcome.

You know, welcome to the show.

Exactly. You know, turn 50 next year. That's okay. Late bloomer.

Scheme of things. They're like, well, why? You know, because they obviously. I post pictures of me working out. I actually prefer not to do that. My team said, no, you should show people your life.

Yeah.

What your real life is like. So obviously, I'll do workout show or workouts. Workout content. And a question I got even recently was, you know, why or how do you have the. Not the hood spot to do it or whatever. But I remember Steve in the back of my head.

Yeah.

Like, I remember him in the back of my head saying, you know, what good is it if I have no health?

Yeah.

Right. So as beautiful as Safe Haven is. And it's stunning, right?

Yeah.

As beautiful as the relationships and friendships I have around the world are. Which are awesome.

Yeah.

As amazing as my kids are. Right. And my grandkids. But, yes, I have grandkids, y'. All. Don't laugh. I'm Pops. If you do the math. The math works out.

Maths.

The math just barely. But at maths also, all of my kids are not technically, biologically mine, which is why they're six foot tall. But, you know, out there, you know, but yeah, no, I obviously, I kind of. Kind of quasi adopted a lot of kids along the way. I'm including some adults. But anyway, all those are amazing. Right?

Right.

But then I got to thinking, like, one of the reasons I protect my health now is, like, my grandson Ocean was here, who's barely five months old.

Yeah.

Just as generally yesterday Matter of fact, we had to turn, we have to turn this place back around after the kids were here. Anyway, he's here. He's got these big beautiful blue eyes, laughing and giggling. I'll show you guys, I'll show you a video when we're done with filming. But I was like, I just want to be able to spend more time with him.

Yeah.

Like, I want to see him grow, I see him prosper, I want to see him like, like become more. And I wanted to share that story with you because.

As people who are a type of go getters trying to build something from scratch or scale something from nothing or elevate or feel like they're trying to chase the quasi corporate ladder or whatever, any number of those acronyms or those little acronyms, anyone sayings.

The one thing that I feel like everyone shares in common until they become self aware is that's the last thing that they focus on. Not realizing everything from, you know, we had Sarah Estes on with Sarah Nova recently, which I know. I'm excited for you guys to work together, get to know each other better.

Yeah, yeah.

And the brain is neutrified based on the nutrients of the body.

Yeah.

So if you're putting poison in, you're not getting optimal brain function, you're not getting optional optical physical function. Yeah. And I believe that those will give you. It'll make it more difficult for you to have the frequency that you need to actually talk spirit to spirit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right. So maybe talk to me a little bit about some of, some of the journey that you've seen in transformations that you've witnessed, maybe even your own transformation, like how you, how you became aware of like the need for this and then how you begin to attack it.

Yeah. I'll start with myself because I was young, you know, relatively fit because I was an athlete in high school and the party scene. So I ate what I want, drank whenever and then that perpetuated into drinking all the time. And then, you know, my first marriage was, wasn't bad. We were just young and did not communicate, so I was not able to communicate my needs. So I ended up stepping out and that marriage ended, which led to more unhealthy habits. And it was harder for me to work out because I felt like crap and I didn't want to. And it wasn't until I started competing that I. I just had to change my habits altogether, I changed my diet altogether. And that is when I really realized that when I ate like crap, I felt like crap. And my workouts were crap. And when I was eating good and optimal, it was fantastic and my body responded to it and I looked great. And so it just motivated me to keep doing that. And so it's easier for me to explain that to my clients. You know, I get it. I've been there, I've been eating. I have ate that way before too. And now when I'm working with them and I'm focusing on making sure they have the right macronutrient plan and making sure they're hitting their right numbers, they realize that, you know, I was low on my protein and I ate fast food or whatever the case may be and I didn't feel good. But when I'm hitting, you know what you have prescribed for me, I feel great and my workouts are great and we're sharper. I mean we can go down the rabbit hole of peptides also.

But I, I do smorla. I have some more.

I love it.

Yeah, I don't do GLP1 because I don't need to lose any weight.

Yeah, but.

Or no, this is. Yeah, I think it's JLP1. That's a weight. Yeah.

Yeah.

I do some Orland and then methylene blue.

Yeah. How do you like methylene blue?

I noticed that if I take like they want me to take it twice a day, like in the morning, in the evening.

If I just take tincture or capsule.

It'S a tiny little tiny itty bitty capsule.

Okay. Okay.

But if I take it once a day and if I don't, if I take it late in the day, I actually. My mind's really active at night.

Yeah.

So I take it, if I take it at all, I take it first thing in the morning.

Yeah.

It's been great for long term travel and like not sleep deprivation per se.

But like kind of helps you get back.

Yeah. Well, it just helps me kind of like be focused. Then I get back into rhythm and stuff like that. So it's been helpful there. But I do find it being clearer than caffeine.

Yes.

Like I said, being drinking caffeine a lot. Even though I still like caffeine. I'm just honest with people. I love it. C4 Matter of fact, not. Not the kind you find in the store.

Horrible. I don't get me started. Don't get me started.

But I can't help it. It's so good. It tastes so good. It's better than Red Bull.

This is true.

Anyway.

But yes, like I was saying, they notice it too. So what? You fuel your body what you put in, you're going to get out. If you put garbage in, you're going to get garbage out. And it, you see it, you see it in your relationships, you see it in how you do business. You can just tell like that brain fog is real. Right?

Yeah. And the last time you want, the last place you want brain fog is in the middle of an important, important conversation.

Yes, exactly. Exactly.

Definitely affects your ability to listen for sure.

Yes.

Or retain what you've learned.

Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

That's awesome. Well, when, you know, when you. One of the things that was with the functional medicine space is it seems like it's been a slow growth phase.

And while I'm not anti.

Pharma, pharmaceutical, I'm just gonna go too far down a rabbit hole. I'm not anti. I was still, I was telling Sarah, one of our mutual friends, that I'm a big believer in try holistic first and optimize that. And if you're still struggling out that which I haven't experienced, then you can look at the more medical, like the direct medical stuff.

Yeah.

Because I find that the medical side is a lot more about symptom treatment where your functional side tends to be more about root treatment.

Yep, exactly.

You know, so if you change the root, you change the fruit.

Exactly.

Doesn't matter what tree it is.

Right, exactly, exactly.

Yeah.

I, So I have 20 year, 20 plus years in Western medicine. I thought I was going to die in that. Right. I wanted to be a flight nurse. There's no shade on western medicine at all. I think there is a time and a place for it.

I would agree with that.

That being said.

I am very much for functional medicine. Like you said, you get to the root of it. We live in a culture where it's, it's a microwave society. I want, I want it fixed and I want it fixed now. And I want the easiest way possible. If it's a pill, if there's a pill for every ill and that's what they do and they only treat your symptoms, they don't listen to what your lifestyle is, what you.

Not only that, that pill may conflict with another ill.

Exactly, exactly. It's so frustrating for me.

There's another symptom. Let's treat that one too.

Yes. With another pill. Yes. And it's just, that's what it does. That's what they've been conditioned to do. And again, no shade. That's just what doctors have been taught. They've been taught if they have the symptom, then this is the Pill to fix it. Functional medicine, though, that we get to the root of it, they do different kind of labs. It's not just your basic labs. And even so, it is so frustrating, especially with the women that I work with. You know, they say, I feel like crap, crap, I'm gaining this weight. They say I'm not in perimenopause, and they just do these basic labs and they're not looking deeper into things. And what might relatively seem normal, you're actually not normal. You're on the very high end of what is normal. So you're not normal. So I love partnering with functional medicine practitioners because I do not order labs, I do not interpret labs. I do have the knowledge, but I stay in my lane when it comes to that. Right. So that's why I love functional medicine, because it gets to the root of it and it fixes the problem. You just have to be willing to take the time to do it and be patient with your body.

Yeah. I also want to maybe bring light to the fact that.

I'm a big believer in functional medicine and holistic health as an in general. Right. So the work you do with just the nutrition side, the work you do, the fitness side, I think those are very specialized. You told me, I mentioned about staying in your lane. Right.

I personally believe that women should work with women who are professionals in these lanes, mainly because I believe, and Sarah even brought this up in my. To my attention as well, is that our bodies are different.

Very.

They're similar on the outside. We have two arms, two legs. We have a. We have two ears, mouth, nose. Right. But there's a lot on the inside that's not the same, even at the hormone levels.

Yeah.

I watched.

Someone who struggled with endometriosis for the longest time.

Went and had their second ovary removed as a way of, you know, obviously trying to not live the symptoms.

Yeah.

Obviously endometriosis, best by knowledge, is the autoimmune disease.

And once the ovary, the second ovary was taken, their overall health began to decline rapidly. They chose not to get hormone replacement therapy of any kind because I know it can help, but it's still a synthetic product.

And then that created cognitive issues, created weight gain, created other things. So this is another reason why I feel like.

Men and women of the same sex should actually really focus on that niche rather than a one size fits all approach. There are certain exercises and things of that nature that everybody can do, and you'll get the benefits from it. You know, you can grow a bicep A couple of different ways, a leg muscle or whatever. But as far as like optimal peak health, can you talk to me a little bit about the difference between what women need specifically as opposed to what men need? Maybe by even just highlighting like what, what really helps a woman optimize Lifting heavy.

That's like my biggest thing for women 30 and and up. We really need to focus on lifting heavy because as we age, like you mentioned, our hormones, that's, that's the number one pushback. But I absolutely love that it's changing. Like the narrative of that is changing, which I freaking love. But you're not going to look like a man because men and women, like you said, are built differently. We have different hormones, we respond differently. If I, I'm. Doesn't matter how heavy I go, I'm not going to look like a man. Unless if I'm taking hormone, you know, enhance drugs. Unless if I'm on steroids, I'm not going to look like a man.

Yeah.

But. Because when we age, our bones start to deteriorate, our muscles atrophy like it naturally happens. But if we're lifting heavy, it's going to strengthen our bones. It's going to help with the deterioration. It's going to help us as we get older women should. I really, that's my biggest thing is like ease up on the cardio. Like stop doing the hit workouts. The orange theory notion. Shade on that either. Like I, I have clients that still love to do that. But lessen up on that and focus on lifting. Because when you're doing those hit and high intensity workouts, your cortisol is going up. And we're already dealing with an imbalance of hormones. And the more that our cortisol spikes, our body's in stress mode.

Yes.

There's good and bad stress.

Yeah.

But we want to make sure we're getting a good amount of stress.

Yeah.

So lifting heavy, ease up on the hit workout and ease up on the cordio.

I love that advice, especially for women who are.

Well, time stretched, which most women that I know that have families and an entrepreneurial vision and a business, they have a lot of, they don't have a lot of time.

Yeah.

But yet they'll go. And I say they, I'm not a man, I'm not a woman. So I'm just gonna say what I see in the gym.

Yeah. Yeah.

They'll go to a piece of cardio equipment and burn 40 minutes up there and then leave. Not do any kind of really weight training of any kind Whether it's with rubber bands or whether it's, you know, just straight lifting or some form of even like an F45 or like a CrossFit, like, there's. And it, it, it's interesting to me because I believe still to this day that most of them think I'm doing, I'm doing all I can to look great and maintain and feel good.

Yeah.

And I, I, I'm with you. I know that bone density deteriorates as you age, and the only way to keep bone density high is to actually lift.

Yep.

That's part of the reason I lift all the time. I want to be. I want to look like freaking Sylvester stallone When I'm 75. Yeah.

Yeah.

Shredded. Yeah, yeah. Like, and I hope he's not juicing. You know, I don't think he is, but, you know, you know, because that'll, that'll break my heart. Oh, fly if you're listening. Don't break my heart. You know, but, you know, one of the things that I'm, that I'm.

That I hadn't heard until just now was that because, again, literally, I've, I've been in gyms. I've even worked out with women before, and I'm like, hey, do another, you know, do us. Do an extra set. Add an extra weight. And they're like, I don't want to look a man.

You're not, you're not. It just, it doesn't happen unless if you're enhancing yourself.

Yeah, well, and I, I agree with that, because the, the, the frame in which you're lifting on is completely different.

Yeah.

Right. So because you're not saying lift heavy, you're saying lift heavy for you.

Yes, exactly.

You know, so it's like, if you lift 20 pounds now, but can go to 35, knock yourself out.

Yeah, absolutely. What I was back to the, you see the cardio thing and how you see women on the cardio machines all the time, the unfortunate stigma, maybe, or. I don't know, maybe it's a mindset that they have, is that they have to sweat. They have to go in there and they have to sweat, and if they don't sweat, they're not getting a good workout. That's not true. In fact, I can get you a good workout, 45 minutes tops, and you will, you will have an amazing workout. My client right now, who has done amazing, and it's been five weeks, she was so shocked because the program that I have her on is only three days a week, and she's like, really? That's it? Do you want me doing anything else? Can I do something? Nope, don't do anything else other than. Exactly. I have to put it in my. My client's calendars. Rest day. But she has seen amazing progress, and it's those little nuances when I'm with her. If you're guessed at 10 reps, great. The next week we come back and you can bang out 10 reps. We're going up in weight. I want you to be gassed by the time we hit 8, 9, 10. So it's just those little nuances that women really, they don't know unless if they're working with someone that can help them get there.

No, I think that's genius because even, like for these guys who haven't yet, especially women on the. Out there watching and listening. Go visit Lorraine's Instagram channel specifically. We'll give you the information here shortly. But because you do your. You put a lot of your workouts on online.

Yeah, yeah.

And you have a very athletic bill, but it's very feminine.

Thank you.

Right. So it's. It goes to say that, hey, yes. What I'm teaching actually works. This is how I do it. And this goes back to a level of mastery. Right. So I'm always trying to push people towards mastery. And if they're not going to seek mastery in a certain area, hire a master to teach you.

There you go. You know, Exactly.

And just do what they say. I have. I have teachers.

Yes.

You know, so stick to the script.

Stick to the script.

There you go. I want to. Maybe. So we've talked a little bit about the. The physiology side. I want to talk about the psychology and the emotional side.

Okay.

I know a big part of what you also believe in is, you know, healing the mind as well as healing the heart. So in the form of subconscious reprogramming or emotional healing of sorts, like maybe let's. Let's go deep on the subconscious reprogramming as you've experienced and as you walk through it, and then we'll touch on the emotional healing.

Okay. So with the subconscious part of it as it pertains to.

My healing, it's not from. Well, I guess I can take it from a fitness perspective. So I started, as I mentioned, from an unhealthy point because my first husband, I found out, was addicted to porn.

And so that's hard as a woman.

Yeah, big time. Big time.

It's also hard. It's also hard as a man because he probably. It probably happened early, long before yeah.

And there was a level of shame, right?

Yeah.

Because he hid it from me. And so like makes you feel any.

Better for just a little extra healing, he, I'm sure he has it for most. Or hit it for most people.

Yeah, yeah.

It's not, that's something men are proud of.

Yeah.

So it came from a place of. I thought my husband was no longer attracted to me, so I needed to change what I looked like so that he would be attracted to me.

Self abandonment.

Yeah. So that's where that kind of stuff, that subconscious started there. And so then that's how I started working out. And then it had to get to a point where, I mean, then it got to a point where he didn't, he flat out didn't like the way I looked because he said I look. Looked too chiseled. I looked like a man. When I didn't, it was just, I was very, very thin and very muscular. Very lean, I should say, because I wasn't even that muscular. But anyways, I looked too hard, too chiseled. And so it by, it backfired on me. And then I had to learn to love working out because it was helping me and because it was healing me. So that subconscious, the reprogramming, I had to reprogram my thoughts of, of I'm not doing this for him, I'm doing it for me. This is healthy. I need to do this for my mental health agency. Yeah.

Yeah.

And so it just. The whole evolution of my fitness and my health journey has a lot to do with the subconscious and the reprogramming because it has evolved of why was I doing it, what was I running from?

And because it was an unhealthy relationship, I was at the gym because I didn't want to be at home. So there were so many different levels of the subconscious work that I needed to do. Unbeknownst to me, I didn't know it until years later when I went through fucking humanity. Yeah. When I went through this happen again. Yeah, exactly. Why am I here? But no, really, when I went through personal development and I started learning about subconscious reprogramming and then I had to flip the script and I had to start telling myself different narratives pertains to anything really, you know.

Yeah. Yeah. Self love is a, is a beautiful thing when you, when you actually go after it.

Yeah.

And most people think, well, it's funny, I, when I start talking about self love, it was like, well, I don't want to become an arrogant jerk. I don't want to become this I'm like, no, self love is different than faking it.

Yeah.

Right. Self love is pure.

Self love is different than love of self.

Exactly. Exactly. Beautifully said. Yeah, Yeah. I, you know, I'm a big believe. I. I've said this on a couple different shows already. I'm a big believer for me that the only way to work on the subconscious is to bring the subconscious to the conscious and which you can only do with a. With an expert who can walk you how to go through from conscious to subconscious and uproot stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm a big fan of MD emdr, Family systems Therapy. I'm a big believer in meditation. And I, I. People like. Well, that meditation sounds new age. It's not new age, dude. It's. It's. It's listening versus talking. A lot of times when we're praying, we're. We're not. At least from that I've seen. Including myself, I'm praying to say. And I meditate to listen. Listen. My journaling practice is more of a listening, you know, I shared with you guys before we hopped on. It's like, here's. Here's what I heard before this event.

Yeah.

And this is what happened at the event.

Yeah. That's crazy.

There's no way that I would have picked up on those. You know what I'm saying? So it's like.

Yeah.

So for me, listening.

It takes. For me, it's taken presence to listen, listen to hear, hear to apply.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That combined with people who are masters at family systems therapy, which was what I did with Henry and Tara Namar.

And then I. And I know other folks have had a lot of success with emdr.

Yeah.

But they work because they're not conscious behaviors. I feel like a lot of the therapeutic levels know. And there's no, no shade on anybody. If it's the talk at you or talk with you therapy, it seems to be effective, but a much slower process.

Yeah.

Than trying to figure out what's driving the automatic behaviors. However, that requires a certain level of humility to say, hey, I realize I'm repeating the same behaviors or getting the same results, and I don't want them anymore.

Yeah.

What needs to change.

Yeah.

And if someone's in that. In that. That vein, it seems like the best advice we could give them is like, find a specialist. Right. But I'm also a big believer in getting the body involved. Because if you get the body involved, the mind will follow.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my gosh. That book, the. The Body Keeps score. Yes.

That actually came up. One of the other podcasts.

Oh, my gosh. Yes. That just totally blew my mind. And it totally does. Like, you don't even realize it until you start doing the work and you start uncovering these things.

Not to kind of like, go on left field here, but what.

Follow anywhere.

What. One of the things that has come up for me that I have struggled with so much because I thought I have healed. I thought that I healed through, you know, the first. The. The end of the first.

I'm jiggling because I. I've been there. Right. Even recently.

Right. I know.

But it's. That's such a beautiful story.

Thank you.

The. The end of the first marriage, the traumatic of the second marriage, and the work that I did, and then now the struggle that I'm having with my stepson, I am. My nervous system is so wackadoodle, and I'm just like, what is going on? I don't understand why this is happening. And just one day, driving, I just felt the Holy Spirit say, what if you need to give him what you never got? What if you are so uncomfortable because he's needing what you never got and.

Reminding you of it?

Yeah. And that's why I'm uncomfortable, because I never got it.

That's good, Lorraine.

Yeah, that's good right there. And so now I'm in a place of, like, when I get, oh, so uncomfortable, I have to be present and I have to slow down and go, oh, why am I. Why am I. Why am I uncomfortable? Because he needs something that I never got, and I need to give it to him. And so it also means you need.

To find a place to receive it in order to give it.

Right.

Because I find a lot of. Especially with parents, it's hard to parent a child in a way you've never been parented.

Yes. Yes. Because you're like, what am I doing? What do I do? So, again, goes back to my faith, where I just sit before the Lord, and I'm just like, okay, God, what do I need to do? How do I need to show up right now? And what do I need to do?

Yeah. Yeah. I think the. The most difficult things for parents on this is fitness meets parenting meets everything.

Sorry.

No. So sorry for it. I'm having a blast. I love this world. No, I. I just. It's a reminder that as parents, we have to be intentional. Right. I think every parent intuitively designs for their children to live a better life than whatever they experienced. And, you know, when you. When you Go back far enough, you. You see depression, great depressions and world wars and self medication before self medication would even had a title.

You know, my grandfather survived Pearl harbor and he was one of seven people in North Carolina until he passed away a number of years ago. But I know that he self medicated with alcohol. Like, he went. He went one way and came back a different way, but his intent on God and family and all that never changed.

Yeah, right. Yeah.

But it was still. It ended up being a bit of a lifelong battle for him.

Yeah.

Right. And unknowingly, he accidentally. Because of the way he behaved and grim. I love my grandma. He did a lot of things. Beautiful.

Yeah.

This was just his thing that he worked. That he worked on the balance of his life. But I think at the most unhealed place, got a lot of the children involved in alcohol. So my dad struggled with alcohol for a long time. That and being the Marine Corps. And apparently it's like a. It's like the only pastime you can do at Parris island just to go to a bar, you know, but these different elements, I just. But then I, you know, then you get to me and I'm like, well, I don't. I don't really. I think I was 20, 24, 25 before I had my first drink.

Wow. Good for you.

Yeah. I mean, and I'm. Even now. I'm cognizant of it.

Yeah.

I'm always like, I want to be careful. Like I'm, you know, I want to. I might enjoy a cocktail or something like that, but I. I don't want it to become lifestyle.

Yeah.

I also, ironically, we can actually talk about alcohol for a second. I also realized that if I drink alcohol that night, the night of. I have a harder time sleeping.

Yeah.

And I have a harder time wanting to work out the next day.

100. And even if it's a little.

Even it's a little. Yeah.

Yeah.

Now, I have seen a. A discrepancy or a difference between what I would call brown or colored alcohol versus clear alcohol.

Oh, okay.

And I know that at least with keto, if you're doing. If you're drinking alcohol, they recommend either tequila, vodka, or gin.

Clear. Yeah.

Which are all clear.

Yeah.

They say pretty much stay away from anything. Scotch, anything. Whiskey, anything. Bourbon.

Yeah.

All that kind of stuff. So ironically, because I'm not a professional and doing this stuff. What does alcohol do to the body?

Oh, my God. It's a. It's poison.

Damn it.

It's poison.

You just ruined my date. Night.

I'm so sorry.

Call it poison.

It is. I mean, have you heard of Dr. Dr. Amen.

Also being, say, Dr. Seuss. Damn it.

No. Dr. Amen. I'm so obsessed. So he scans brains. He works with trauma.

Yeah. Tbs.

Yes, I was gonna say that, but I'm like, oh, no. He works with. He did a whole huge study. He scanned over 250,000 brains, worked with former athletes, football players, all the things. People with who've had trauma, people who have struggled with addiction, all these things. And so he scans the brains and shows you. You know, remember the. The commercials? This is your brain on drugs.

Yeah.

But it's a scan. And so. Yes. And he'll show you, like, this is what a healthy brain looks like. And this is what an unhealthy brain. Brain looks like. And he goes through and shows you, like, how your brain has developed and been affected from alcohol, from trauma, from all these things, but alcohol being one of them. It is poison. It deteriorates your brain. It doesn't help you. Like you said, you don't get.

There's no real benefit other than just being loosey goosey while you're Lucy. Goosey goosey. You probably should be loosey goosey. So I. Fine.

I mean, I even notice. So I wear a whoop. And I've noticed a whoop band.

Okay. So I wasn't familiar with whoop.

You know, like an apple watch. No. You know, aura rings.

Ora wings. I'm familiar with. I have one of those.

Okay. It's just like that.

Okay.

But better.

For Aura. We lost you guys as a sponsor.

Sorry. No, just kidding.

Not sponsored by Aura.

Not yet.

I'm sponsored by Sarah Nova. What are you talking about?

Lord willing. Me too.

So I track my hrv.

Yeah.

And so Ed Mylett actually got me really hooked on that because he was talking about how bad his was. And he's a very fit guy, very high energy. I definitely don't have that high of energy, but I started paying attention to my hrv. And your HRV is directly connected to your nervous system and also how your body responds to alcohol. It dramatically affects your hrv and it puts it in the toilet.

Wow.

And so I. I don't. Other than maybe the taste of it, if some people.

No, it's okay. I don't. I don't mind telling me the truth. Hurt my feelings at all. It's not like I, I. I learned constantly. Which is good. Yeah, no, that's good. I thought. I was thinking, you know, that we going back to the body keep score and the things like even an alcohol. I think alcohol intensifies whatever you're feeling.

Yeah. It's a depressant.

Yeah. So one of the things that I. I kind of like picked up on is most people don't know what a nervous system that's at rest feels like. Even people that struggle with anxiety, which I used to be one of those.

Don't.

What's. Don't. When the only time that they get where they actually feel like they know that they're feeling the anxiety is when they can't function. Not realizing just that like the tightness in the chest or the tightness in a limb or whatever is actually a sign of an anxious response and anxious responses. The fear response of a uncertain outcome. Right. And I didn't know until I went and did the somatic work. Keep in mind, I'm. I'll be 50 in January. Right. So I'm. I'm not a spring chicken. However, I'm not an old one either. So don't try to, you know, just throw the note out.

You're just getting started. Just.

I am really just getting started, you know, but in the grand scheme of things, I was thinking in terms of like, I didn't know what it was like to walk around in peace because I didn't realize I had so much stuff trapped in my nervous system, in my body. Have you done any kind of nervous system work to release stuff? And if so, what have you done?

The. So not with a professional. I'm actually looking to find someone that I can work with because I am realizing that I thought I was at peace and I'm not.

And the issues recommend Tara Mar.

Okay.

For women.

Okay. Oh, perfect. I. I need to write that down because I know the tools that I know and that I do and that I thought were working for me. Grounding, journaling.

Breath work, big time breath work. And for a minute, I. I really thought that that was working for me. The. Like, you were talking about sound therapy. So I do binaural beats. I absolutely love it. And at some times, I feel like I am grounded and centered. Sometimes I'll go through a day and I'm like, I. I had a really. I had a relatively good day. You know, I wasn't stressed. And again, the whoop band will tell me when I'm stressed and I'll wake up the next day and my HRV is like, in the tank, it's in the toilet. And I'm like, what is going on? And what it is, is with your Nervous system is not regulating. It doesn't come back to its normal state baseline.

It stays elevated.

It stays elevated all the time. And so what I'm finding is like, the practices that I have been doing, like I said, the breath work, the grounding, the journaling are, for whatever reason, not working. And so I am super interested in what further I can do to help that. But one of the things is that I've noticed your chaos, or I'm sorry, peace feels like chaos. So that's how you know your nervous system is.

It's interesting you say that, because people that I know that were.

I've been around many people that struggle with chaos, and for them, chaos feels normal.

Yes.

For me, chaos is scary.

Yes.

Which is why I would jump in and try to solve the chaos.

Yes. Because we don't like that.

So it's been. It's been really interesting to see or understand that. That some of us, our nervous systems have been so tattered that chaos can even feel safe.

Right. Right. But it's not.

Yeah. I had the. I was telling. I can't remember if I told you or Sarah or, like, who all I told, but it still holds true. So I'll just say it again. When I began dating the woman that I've been. That I've been dating now for the last seven months or so.

She is so steady. The. The word that keeps coming up that we would talk is the word steadfast, which, ironically, is in my blue document. In fact, I might even let you read it for the whole thing, just for fun.

That it took me three and a half weeks to get used to it. I was so used to chaos, even after being largely single for an extended period of time and stuff like that.

That wasn't sure how to handle it.

Yeah.

Now that I. I had to remind myself, I said, and calm is peace. Calm is peace. Peace, calmness, peace. Like, I had to remind myself, this is what it's supposed to feel like. Yeah, it's just new. Yeah, it's just new. And I had to remind myself because I had to unprogram myself around, you know, certain relationship characteristics that influence my body, maybe and made me want to work out, not want to work out or sleep more, sleep less, or be focused or not be focused or be disassociated, I guess is the word to say it were.

Yeah.

And I've seen this happen with people. Like, I might just. I've. I've dissociated probably 20 or 30 minutes. I've seen people just disassociate for weeks. Which I don't understand.

Yeah.

With the. With the. Without the. The understanding that they actually just went through some very traumatic experiences. Have yet to be dealt with. So I can tell you that in my last year, I had three things that actually came up from childhood as a result of this journey that I had completely forgotten about. Repressed.

Yeah.

And so I'm a big believer in, again, finding someone who can walk you through the necessary exercise and put you in a meditative state.

Yeah.

Which is the only way to operate, to get to the subconscious.

Subconscious. Yeah.

Right. And bring the stuff up and then work this way to deal with it in safety and.

Yes.

And then it disappears.

Yes, yes, yes. And it's so funny that you. Not funny that it happened, but that's where I was at, you know, in some of my therapy, I would ask my counselor, like, I don't know, like, I can't remember if something happened to me in my childhood. I. I need someone to get to that, to bring that up, because I'm feeling this way and I know this is not right. And I need my nervous system to regulate and I need it to get back to that calm, steady state. So I, like, am so curious of what is inside that maybe I repressed or that my brain is protecting me from. Of not uncovering.

Because I just. I want. I want that out in the open. I want it healed and whole, you know?

Yeah. Well, I guess I'm gonna recommend Henry this time.

Henry. Henry's interesting because outside of being just an amazing person and brother, like, he's. He and I got really super close last year.

He was the one reminded me all the time. He said, when people show you who they are, like, listen.

Yes.

Like, if. If you see things like, stop trying to project it, everything's peachy keen. And. Yeah, all this. If we just, like when they show.

You who they are.

Listen. He would remind me of stuff like that, but he was also really good about. I actually did one of his immersion programs. I forgot the name. I think it may have changed names by now, but it was the. I was a part of a mastermind of sorts with about 10 other people. And then we. At the end of the. The process, because we. He would do a process at every single interval. So every time we met, we would do it. We would have either, like a bit of a teaching and then we'd formally do the actual process. And then he would also meet with everybody one on one. So met as a group once a month, met Henry one. Like, we would Meet each other once. Like once a month.

Okay.

We would do a very. What. What equates to a family system systems therapy approach of somatic exercises to release trap things. And then when you do it, then at the end, you. You do a formal retreat for two and a half days.

Oh, wow.

Right. And at the retreat, everybody comes together in the person and he walks us through another set of stuff. Oh, cool. Which was powerful in its own right. But one of the things I love about Henry is he is proficient in hypnotherapy as well as family systems therapy.

Okay.

And what's interesting about that is the reason he does it is because it healed him. Him like when I had him on the show, and this has been a while ago, but when he came on the show, virtually get him and Taryn out here, like now.

Yeah.

And so Taryn specifically works with females and help and helps females get. Get regulated and get centered and all this kind of just a beautiful thing. And then here's kind of the. The hypnotherapy meets family systems therapy. So.

I guess what I. I. As part of that. I guess the. The takeaway is I've heard you express the importance of actually wanting to do the work.

Yeah.

And that seems to be the most difficult part that I've seen. However, if I'm understanding you correctly, you're. Some of the things that your. Your hiring clients that you work with do is they really want to do the work. They're very open.

Yes.

So what do you think the. The switch is with the last few minutes that we have? What do you think the switch is from going from I don't care to. This is very important. Important.

I think, man, I don't know, because it's really. That's a really personal question. So these clients that. What I am seeing is these successful women.

Have seemingly have it all, and they really want to embody what they are doing, what they're. Whether they're teaching about or what they're helping people with, but they really want to embody it. And I feel like these higher earners have this level of commitment, this drive that they know the results they want. They trust me, and they do the work.

Yeah.

And they follow the plan and they stick to the script.

Yeah. Yeah. So much. So much of what. What I see with people is accountability, responsibility. I think it's easy to opt into a program 100 and not get any results because you're not making any effort.

Right.

A teacher is only good as the teacher is only as good as a student's application.

100. 100.

Like a lot, so. Well, man, this has been awesome. Before we hop out, I want to. I want to talk a little about your. Your vision. I know you're working on a brand new vision.

Yes.

I love it, especially as someone who's busy like myself. I have, like, then. And this is a very. A very nice home, as you know. As you've seen, it's beautiful, but yet there's still not a gym in this place. What?

You don't have a gym here?

There's not a gym here. I have everything else but a gym. I had to choose either a gym or a studio.

Okay.

And I chose studio on me. I'll have her on the plans. It says gym, but, you know.

Yeah, but I was thinking you can hire a trainer.

That's what I'm saying. I can hire a trainer to pull up with all the equipment.

Yes.

I don't have to buy it, I don't have to ship it, I don't have to move it. I show up, I do the work work. And the trailer departs with the trailer.

Yeah.

So when you share this idea, this concept with me, I was thinking, that's genius. Especially someone like myself who travel. I've been traveling so much recently, which has been beautiful. I love travel, honestly.

Yes, yes.

But then I also love safe haven too. So anyway, talk to me about, Talk to me about the. This new vision.

Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited for this. Okay, so it's Armor Up Fitness. That's my, My brand, anyway, is armor up Ephesians 6:11. You got to put on the full armor of God. And so Armor Up Fitness is this trailer that I'm working very hard to get. It's.

It's a highly customized trailer.

Yes. It's going to be fully equipped. Battle ropes, dumbbells, kettlebells, squat rack. It'll have everything I need to get you the training that you need, and I come to you. It's a white glove experience. That is with the one on one training, because I do in person and mobile. But also my vision is to make it more mobile, more accessible to people that otherwise aren't close to gyms or in neighborhoods where moms are super busy.

Or homeschool parents. Yes, homeschool moms.

Yes, yes, yes. So moms in the neighborhoods or go to schools and do training for the youth vision.

I'm gonna share with you real fast. It's like a glimpse. I see the trailer pulling up and not only is the mom coming out, but she's got a couple of daughters that are playing along.

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Because that's. I just want to infiltrate, you know, the community and you know, as we had meant, I told you earlier before, like, trainers are a dime a dozen. They're everywhere. Right. So how am I going to stand out? How, how am I going to.

I got an easy answer for you. Be effective.

There you go. Besides that. But you know, like I want. Yeah. I remember I saw Lorraine, she armor up fitness. Right. She had that little trailer. She came to this event. So that's kind of my vision is to. Yeah, I love it.

Well, I want everybody to find you on obviously Instagram and like learn more about that. I know that you're trying to build a community of people that, you know, maybe it's like your, your founding members of, of this new armor up kind of community. Community.

Yeah.

Which I think would be really cool. Maybe there's a way to kind of get started with you and start testing stuff out and we gotta, we gotta outfit the thing first. But yeah, I think it'll be really cool. Yeah. And I'm sure there's a few folks that probably are looking for some, some, some one on one help. And I know you can do some stuff virtually but. And obviously I know you could do some stuff live as well. And I encourage everybody to kind of find, come. Come to you and find out what's available to them. I also know that your roster gets pretty full pretty quick.

Yes.

So I want to encourage everybody to do that. Where can I find out more about working with you?

They can find me on Instagram. That's my name, Lorraine Michaels.

Spell it.

L O R A Y N E.

Thank you for us dyslexic folks.

And you can book a call directly there from my profile. Yeah, that's the easiest way.

Awesome.

And I'd love to connect and I absolutely love in person training because I am such a of face to face.

Oh. It's also energetic exchange.

Yes, yes.

The show to being away from virtual as much as humanly possible. Unless it's absolutely necessary.

Yeah.

Because the audience gets more. The conversations are deeper, they're better.

Yeah.

It's not uncommon. I've cried on the show like I don't know how many times since we went in person. Yeah. And I've also had the guests have also like shared like you. So you know, it's pure and it's from the heart. It's real, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Awesome. Thank you so much. Oh my gosh. I love it.

Awesome. Thanks, Laureen. That was awesome.

Yeah.

Can't wait to see you again.

I know. Likewise.

Hey, guys, that's gonna do this wrap for Build. I hope you guys enjoyed the episode as always. Please, like share, comment, share with a friend. One of the things that you may not remember on a regular basis is you're watching the show, you're consuming the show, which is fantastic. I'm so thankful and so glad you're here. But one of the things I'm gonna start asking of you is to help us serve. And the best way to help us serve others is to simply share this show with somebody in your network that you know needs it, right? In this particular episode, we talked about all kinds of things from somatic healing to nutrition to overall fitness specific as it relates to the female physiology. I'm telling you right now, there are women out there who need this education, who need this help. And I encourage you to share this with somebody who you know is maybe on a journey of struggling on this journey this, this category in this fitness. So until then, we'll see in the next Build. Much love. God bless. Peace out. Peace. Hey guys, I hope you enjoyed that amazing conversation. And if you want more just like that to help you level up your life and your business, you're not going to miss this next one.

Check it out, whatever happens. So when you have a miscarriage, no one knew you were pregnant to begin with. And I proceeded to, in the year of 2022, have three miscarriages back to back. If I keep, keep going down this path, it's going to be IVF and, and there's a very small percentage chance it's going to work. No one was digging in to what was going on specifically in my situation. I had to become my own advocate.