How Do I Overcome Feeling Hopeless? | Life-Mastery Q&A

I've been sleeping on a friend's couch for about two months and I can't seem to land a job. Things are starting to feel hopeless and I'm losing motivation. Do you have any advice on how to move forward from this? You were coming to the right person for this one. I rode a couch and I rode outside and also slept in cars for a number of months. And I remember thinking that somehow my life was over somehow, that I was never going to measure up somehow, that because I couldn't make ends meet in the moment, that it was going to basically alter the course of my entire life. Here's the thing. It did, but it did in a good way. So it comes down to mindset. It comes down to whether or not you're going to become a fighter or a quitter. Okay? Fighters will keep fighting. Fighters will find a way. Fighters will get creative. Fighters may go out, mow a lawn, wash a car, rake a yard. Right? Fold somebody else's laundry. What can you do today to begin to add value to other people? Right? Don't worry about where you're sleeping. Worry about where you could sleep. Worry about where you could go. Worry about who you could be. Because the longer you focus on everything that's led you to that moment where things just don't seem like they're clicking, especially in this Covid environment that we're in right now, the longer it's going to take you to understand what your fullest potential is. Imagine this. Imagine all the lives that wouldn't be touched, all the businesses wouldn't be started, all the people that wouldn't have been employed had I given up. Now reverse that. Imagine all the things that won't happen if you give up. Reclaiming your hope is not about focusing on where you're at. Reclaiming your hope is about focusing on who you become and how you can get there. I wouldn't waste a single second not bettering myself, right? Not. Not in today's time. Where we have YouTube, we have Instagram, we have Facebook, we have all these different resource resources to become more resourceful, be more creative, learn more, create more value. Like I would be studying my heart's content out on making myself sharp, right? Consider yourself a razor knife. Don't have a dull blade. Have a sharp blade. Because at some point in time, it will be your time. At some point in time, it will be time for you to go and not to stay. You need to be ready for that. And how do you do that? You're constantly growing, leaning into personal growth. On that side. And then you're also becoming creative. You are not letting that couch become your prison. Instead, you're getting off of that couch on purpose every day. So at some point in time, you can do like I did and actually flip it off. And I knew that's so strong. But I did. When I was finally able to break free from some of the trailer parks and things that I was staying in, I actually had this. I told you I could do this moment. And I promise you, if you will just keep working at it, you'll keep growing yourself. You keep becoming creative, keep coming, coming up with new ways to earn stuff like that. You will. You will break free. But you can't quit. So don't quit. Keep going. You got this.

I'm a recent college graduate. I've noticed that my motivation to do new things and go out with friends is beginning to drop. That's a good thing. I'm not saying you shouldn't be sociable because you should. You should have friends. Don't get me wrong. But it can hold you back some. I used to be energetic and excited to be around people. What do you suggest I do to get back to being myself again? Well, so there's a couple different things. Is there's different seasons of life. There's a winter season, there's a summer season, there's a spring season. Right. It follows the same kind of seasonality that we have here. Just in general with our climate. Seasons of summer are typical of seasons of rebirth and kind of getting. Things are not rebirth, but things were passionate. You can kind of pursue it, keep going. Seasons of spring are about rebirth. Right. Seasons of winter about taking back what you've learned from who you are and what you've been through to try to reflect and kind of see what you can do with that. Seasons of fall, or where you take what you learned and you notice what you need to learn to prepare for the spring. Why do I say that? Because it sounds like you're just going into a new season of life where there's. You're now beginning to set new priorities, new objectives and new outcomes. And as a result, a lot of us will actually go through a process where we'll shed like, almost like, and I use this word loosely, but shed a skin like a snake. Where we're shedding off our old self because we're becoming our new self. Right? When we're becoming our new self, a lot of times what happens is we have a following away of certain relationships, especially if we've been in A zone of personal growth for some time, a lot of time. Personal growth within you will be uncomfortable for others and they'll disassociate. That's okay. Why? Because the area you're going is going to require different types of relationships. And it's not that you're losing motivation, it's that you're stepping into a new season. So the best thing you can do is lean into the season of awareness, discovering who you are, discovering why you're here, and then discovering what to do about it. And then you will have. Your relationships will come to you. They'll be attracted to you in such a way that you can build those relationships so you can go out and have fun. Right. Be okay with the little things. Be okay with the moments of sacrifice. Be okay with the diligence. Be okay with taking the time to focus on becoming the best version of yourself. Right. That sounds like the season you're set being into. And I know at first it feels uncomfortable because things are changing that have been your normal. Well, now you're setting in a new normal. And that new normal will take you to another new normal later on. Lean into the season. Lean into the learning, lean into the discovery, lean into the exploring. Don't be so fixated on what life used to be like. Be fixated on the life you want to create. Lean there, do the work, get the result. You'll acquire the new friends and relationships you need, and they'll actually be twice as fulfilling as they were before. Don't give up. Don't lose hope. Keep it moving forward.

All right, so this is coming from a pretty sincere heart. It says, steven, I'm going to be very vulnerable with you. I struggled with the thoughts of suicide for the last year. I think it's related to my divorce and how difficult it is for me to heal. You have shared in your videos that you've been through this. How do we get in the headspace? Much love, brother. Well, first of all, I want to tell you that I love you. I'm sincerely. I love you. And you have immense worth. And I'm sorry that you're in a season where you haven't to fully step into that, discover that yet. I know for, from personal experience how difficult and how painful that is, especially when you don't feel like nothing's measuring up. You don't feel like you're being good enough. You don't feel like you have a future and all this kind of stuff. And a lot of times you're not. You're probably not Surrounded by the right people or on the other side, you may have isolated yourself from people in general. Here's what I would say. The mental mind shift, the mindset shift happened for me when I understood that if I was going to go down, meaning if I was, if I was going to not hear me out. Now, I'm not saying take your life, but if I was going to struggle and I was going to go, mean whatever, go down fighting, I was going to go down fighting. Like, if I was going to struggle and I wasn't going to measure up and I wasn't going to have the life that I thought I was, that I deserved or wanted, I wasn't going to give up. I was going to go down swinging. That is one mental shift that you can make right now, Right now, in this moment, watching this video right now, that can change everything. You got to have that grit moment that if I'm going to fight or if I'm going to go down, I'm going to go down swinging.

That one methodology takes you to surrender and shift.

Don't be someone who is not willing to fight for themselves. The most important person you can ever fight for, the most important belief you can ever fight for is you and the future ahead of you. I'm a living example of where you can come from that mindset to a completely whole new world. And I can promise you, when I was in that mindset, the same mindset that you've shared with your heart, right, right now, when I was there, I couldn't see the future. And because I couldn't see the future, I didn't see a reason to care or to have hope in order to reclaim your hope, have the position that if I'm going down, I'm going down fighting, which means I'm going to keep pushing. I'm going to keep trying. I'm going to keep getting everything I've got. I'm going to keep moving forward. I don't get the job that I want, I'm going to apply for another one. I get fired, I'm going to apply for another one. I'm going to try to try to better myself the next time I'm not living the lifestyle I want. I'm going to keep moving forward until I get it. I'm going to read as many books as it takes, watch as many videos as it takes, listen to as many podcasts as it takes to change this noggin, to change this thing right here. Why is that important, Steve? Mark said it best a long time ago. What Is the difference between a rich man and a poor man the way they think?

Rich men learn to use their mind to create wealth by taking the time to build it over time. Wealth comes here first. Doesn't matter if it's relationships or money or anything else.

Poor people, poor men never use this. They let other people tell them who they're supposed to be. They let other people tell them what their opportunities are like. You create your opportunities. You create your personal growth. You create where you can go. You decide whether or not you want to fight. Fight and fight now and fight harder than you've ever fought before. And pretty soon you'll be sitting right beside me. Stay at it. Don't give up. I'll be here.

I've been working at self awareness now for a month. I don't understand why I'm not getting results.

I love this question and I love you to death. You're probably a lot like me with impatience. Okay, here's the deal. Self awareness and becoming self aware and using those skill sets take time. Why? First, because you have to become truly self aware. Your personality styles, your value systems, your emotional intelligence, your comfort zones, your drivers, your motivators, your skill sets, your strengths, your talents, your gifts. Also your blind spots and your struggles. Once you become aware of those, then you have to go to work on those.

You have to create muscle memory, you have to take action. You have to keep moving forward.

You have to cultivate the gift. I'm an entrepreneur by nature. I don't know any other way. I did a strengths finder thing a long time ago that basically said if I was anything other than entrepreneur, I would really struggle. And guess what? I really struggled until I became an entrepreneur. What are you uniquely gifted at? You see, you have to take the things that you're learning about yourself and begin to stack them up and line them up like a row of dominoes so at the right time, you can flip the sucker over and it takes you to the next level. It's not a one and done. Personal development, self awareness, all this stuff is not a one and done. It is an evolving process. It's an evolving process of discovery, exploration, understanding, recommitment, surrendering, relearning some things. That's what it's about.

So please don't do it like I do and think that you're going to be at this ultimate moment of epiphany. What life is really about is about becoming unstoppable. And to become unstoppable, all you have to do is make consistent progress. Every day you should be able to take one step, and every day after that you take another step, and then that's when you can look back 12 months later and look like, holy, dude, are you serious? Look how far I was last year. Our own Journey Principles team members have had this experience. After being here a year with, working with the team, they've all experienced massive growth. All of them have more opportunities, all of them are growing at a higher level. And all of them have new potential that they're discovering about themselves. Self awareness and breakthrough are not one and done. Breakthrough is getting to a point, breaking through that point, learning more information, grinding it out more, and breaking through another point and then breaking through another point and then breaking through another point. That's how the top. That's how the top 1% make it happen.

Breakthrough is repetitive. It's not one and done. So stop looking at one and done and start looking about how far you can go if you just keep going. Become unstoppable. Make it happen and you'll have an amazing life. Don't. Don't look at where you are today and judge where you're going tomorrow. Don't do that. Don't look at where you are a month from now and think that, okay, I'm supposed to have all this massive progress, this massive success. No, no, no, no. It does. It doesn't work like that. That's a fairy tale, okay? Legends are built after they've gone through the hero's journey, not before.

Legends are built by going through the hero's journey. Awakening, transformation, education, mentorship, guidance, breakthrough. And the cycle starts all over again. That's how it works. That's how you win. That's how you achieve breakthrough on a regular basis. Hope that helped you.

Hey, guys. I hope you enjoyed this week's Life Mastery Q and A video. We're doing a new Q and A video every single Monday, and if you have questions you'd like answered, simply leave a comment with your question below this video or email us@questionsury principles.com and if we use your question, we'll send you a free gift just to say thank you.