How to Build a POWERFUL Brand and Explode Your Business | Ashley Stahl

Anyone can do a TEDx talk if they feel like they really have something to share. And I feel like you kind of know when you have something to say and even if you haven't fully teased it out, it's a democracy of ideas. And that's what I love about the TEDx stage. If you're looking to increase your influence, make an impact, establish more of a brand, I don't know, anything you could do in a personal branding capacity that's gonna be more powerful than a TEDx talk. You know the Internet is full of islands, right? Like I have a Forbes column, I have TikTok, YouTube, my podcast, my book. Those are all islands. No island has influenced me quite like the TedX island because with 10,000 people looking at me every day and thinking of opportunities for me and getting in touch with me, the amount of possibilities is incredible.

Guys, have a welcome. The one and only Ashley Stahl. How are you doing?

I'm living, I'm good.

Aw, man. Super stoked to talk to you. I don't know anybody else that's had as many TEDx talks appear on a TEDx stage as you have. So tell me about how you help so many folks actually start the TEDx journey and actually build a meaningful talk that, you know, kind of honestly just cuts to the noise.

Yeah, I think, you know, for me, I never would have thought working in national security during the Obama administration would lend itself to me becoming a better speechwriter of all things.

Right?

But I remember getting offered a spot on the TEDx stage in 2012, and I'd never spoken on a stage before in my life. And TEDx has different license sizes, meaning that they can have different sizes of crowds based on the TED brand giving them authority to do that.

Okay.

And I just so happened to book TEDx Berkeley, which was a 4,000 person license. It was a pretty big event. I think it was top two in the world as far as size from the TED brand. And given that I'd never spoken on stage, we you had people like Guy Kawasaki who was speaking at that event. And I really didn't know what I was doing. And I remember from getting offered to do it, it was wild. I was in Washington D.C. for an awards ceremony for my work in national security. And I met this woman who in a conversation I was like, you're so amazing. Do you do any speaking? She said, actually I just spoke at tedxun last week. I said, oh, I would love to do that one day. And I to Turkey in Istanbul for a work assignment. I was Stuck in a protest. It was like tear gas was going off. And I remember getting a buzz on my phone when I was hiding in a spice bazaar. And I looked and it was this woman and she referred me to get a TED Talk. And I remember getting back to my hotel and they emailed me and said, we need a speaking reel. And I remember googling, what is a speaking reel? And I propped my iPhone up in the bathroom of this Istanbul three star hotel.

Yeah.

And had the curtain of the shower behind me and I just started kind of aimlessly talking. So I remember thinking, well, I guess this is my speaking reel, like done and done. And thinking how they're probably not going to want to have me talk after they see this thing, but this is the best. And I'm in Turkey for two weeks, so I really can't wait to get this to them in a better setting. Yeah. So I sent it. And by some sort of grace of God, they still took me as a speaker. And I ended up hiring a speaking coach and preparing the best I could of a talk for someone who's 24 years old and never spoken on a stage. I went on after Guy Kawasaki. He had the crowd roaring. He had them so dialed in. And I just did my best. And to this day, that talk went viral. But I look at it and I don't think it's the best I've ever done, but I look at it and say, that's the best I could have done for somebody who'd never done this before. And then in 2019, I remember thinking, okay, now it's time for me to really show what I can do and share. And that talk went super viral. And I knew that it would, because I think that going viral on channels like TEDx, it's not necessarily easy, but it is simple. You simply give the best talk of your life. And when you put that kind of love and effort into it, you really have good odds at going viral. Um, so it's not as much of a mystery as I think people think it is. So, yeah, I. I started getting asked by people after my second TEDx talk. It went super viral. For six months. It died on the Internet. Nobody watched it. But I still knew this thing is it has legs. Randomly. It started going viral. To this day, I think we've got about 9 million views. We're ranked 80th on the TED talk.

Not too shabby.

Not too shabby. And it's a gift. Because what it's done for me is it's taken me out of masculine energy in my career as much as, you know, obviously we need both energies, the energy of pursuit and the energy of receptivity.

Yep.

But I think sometimes we burn ourselves out by being in so much pursuit. And what I love about the TEDx channel is when you put something out there, you invite people to think of things for you, and that brings you to an attracting stage of your career where people are constantly thinking of things you never would have thought about and bringing things to you. So that TED talk that I have out there now has invited so many opportunities towards me that I never would have thought about, and I'm so grateful for those.

Yeah, no, it's amazing. In fact, I was also thinking too, you know, it's. You've had several career pivots in your day.

Yeah, yeah.

You know, I think you. Your introductory was counter terr. Counter terrorism. That's then led to speaking, which then led to like, how did you. How does that transition even happen? Because it seems like. It seems like maybe there was an in. You were operating inauthentically during that time.

Yeah. Early days.

Is that accurate?

Yeah, I don't know if it's that I was inauthentically. I think it's just that getting to know yourself is a process, and I was early in the process. And I think you're always changing, you're always shifting. Every time we learn something new about the world as we know it, old versions of us sometimes die. Like, you know, ways of thinking, ways of behaving, ways of being.

Yeah.

So it's just been huge for me to give myself grace with the process of figuring out who am I.

And how do I want to show up in the world.

Yeah.

And so, you know, it's been a constant course correction and reinvention. And it's interesting because my book, U Turn, it's why. Oh, U turn.

Yeah.

This idea of making a U turn is all about coming home to yourself, reconnecting to your truest being. And I do believe that life is an experiment. And if you want to make a U turn, you're entering a process and that life is the ultimate coach. Sometimes we need to be with questions and sit with life waiting for the answer for a while. And a lot of people think that life is such that we go from answer to answer to answer, but it's really question and then answer and then question and then answer and some questions last years. And so for me, I open up my book with this moment where I was graduating from preschool and the principal wanted us to get in front of a stage and tell all the parents what we wanted to be when we grew up.

Precursor.

And yeah, I remember saying, I want to be a poet and a mother. And it's interesting because, you know, I ended up going into national security, managing a program for Afghanistan, getting these viral TED talks and having a coaching business and having online courses and having a podcast and doing all these amazing things. But here I am now at 36, and I'm the woman behind all the speakers. I'm the storyteller, I'm the poet. So I made the ultimate U turn back to myself. By the time time I was 36, I kind of went off course, but it was all part of my path because. And people say that it sounds trite, but the thing is, is that life has a cost of admission. Fulfillment has a cost of admission, and the cost is experimentation. The cost is getting it wrong to get it right. And so for me, there was no wrong. There was just the process. And so I kept following what felt right. And even though it wasn't actually right for me in the long term, it was right in the short term because on the periphery of it were that were right for me.

Yeah.

And so what that looked like was going into the Pentagon and then realizing I was a really good job seeker, and people asked me for help with that. And then that meant me becoming an entrepreneur and as part of being a coach, being a content creator, which was closer to being a poet on the periphery. And then as I was doing coaching and being a content creator, I started becoming an author, which was much closer to the poet. So it's like who you are always wins. It's going to shine through. And now, you know, like I said, the past year I've written 40 TEDx talks, and I partnered with a booker who booked 39 of those people on the TEDx stage with the talk we wrote. So I think it's really about coming home to yourself. Obviously, it can be painful not to be in alignment, but I imagine there's going to be a day that I don't want to write TED talks and book people on stage.

Yeah.

And that day is just not here right now, because I love this now. And I will fold this way of being into my next iteration of being a poet that I want to be.

Yeah.

So it's a process.

No, I love it. In fact, one of the things I love about kind of the approach and I find that people.

They avoid it for some reason, which is this element of curiosity, being curious with maybe the experiences that they have in fact, I forgot where I heard you say it, but you said something along the lines of.

Be willing to be. What is. What is the question? What do you. What do you want? What do you know? And how do you. Like, what was the word?

What do you know that you wish you didn't know?

Yes, that one. Yes. Because I thought. Because to me, that's going inside. That's curiosity, that's experience. You're. You're looking for that. That intangible piece that kind of then kind of can foster into a bit of. A bit of a flower, so to speak. So help me understand kind of the importance of. Of the. The curious or experiential approach.

Yeah. I mean, I would say when it comes to being experimental, there's this incredible woman named Mary Morrissey, and she had this question that was an idea generation question. She said, let me see her exact question. You. You think of a goal you have, and you say, what can I do from where I am now with what I have now to get closer to? And you think of the goal.

And I would make lists from that question. So I remember in my private coaching practice, I wanted to get more clients and I wanted to help women in the White House. And so I remember thinking, okay, how do I do that? And I sat down and I wrote everything I could do to get more clients in the White House. I could call this person, I could email that person. I could do a free live event and do paid ads. And one of. And what I did at the end of my like 100 thing list because I didn't want to stop my creativity, even if it sounded stupid, was I starred the things that felt good and the thing that felt the most fun was going to D.C. for a weekend and going to some networking events.

And just talking about coaching women in the White House.

Yeah.

I left D.C. with three client referrals, and the referrals begat more referrals. And I was there. I was coaching women in the White House. So it was all it really needed.

Manifestation 2.0.

Exactly. Exactly. So it's really about realizing that there's many ways to create, and you just explore your options and pick what you're pulled towards. And you don't need to expect that every single time you're going to be perfectly met by the universe and that it's all going to be perfect. But you can at the very least be excited that the world has that kind of potential for you.

Yeah. Well, and my experience has been the thing will lead you to the thing as long as you keep doing the thing.

Yeah.

You know, I think your journey, your professional journey kind of admits that. Let's, you know, I've started here. This all evolved into this and this evolved into that. And now storytelling and kind of having a poetic approach to helping other speakers kind of get their, their signature keynotes together for their TEDx talk, which in their mind is you have a hand in their viability because you help, you help showcase the best of them at any given moment. I am curious. This kind of pivots off the speaking side as well. As you turn, you have this concept called core interest.

How does that play into discovering what it is you should be showcasing or developing in any given moment?

I think that all of us have different core interests, meaning that the first thing is to just remember your interests are a backdrop. They're valuable, but they're a backdrop. So I really believe your core skill set is the foreground. And that's why the message of my book, my work, my podcast is don't do what you love, do what you are.

I'm really big in this idea of how do you figure out what your natural talents are? How do you figure out where you naturally shine so that you don't have to push a river in your career anymore? You don't need to push to be someone else. Yeah, I think that's really big. And a lot of people are in denial of who they are because they're over prioritizing their interests. So if you're into fashion.

Remember that that doesn't mean you have a skill set for fashion. That doesn't mean that you're going to be a good designer or a good buyer. That just means you're into it.

Yeah.

There's many roles in fashion. It's a very big pie. Right. Like you could be a fashion writer, you could be a fashion designer, you could be a finance person for a fashion company. So it's really about looking at those roles well before you even think about anything else. And so that's the message that I try to impart to people who are trying to figure out your careers. Do not be distracted.

Yeah.

By your interest. Consider them, Care for them, but don't lead with them.

Yeah, yeah. I was also thinking too, most of the folks that I know, I would say that aren't living their best life. Maybe they're not their ideal career, in their ideal relationship, etc are typically doing so because they're living someone else's life.

Right.

They haven't gone inward enough to really discover what it is they generally care about. So as a result, they're just kind of living out what everybody else has told them they should do, should be doing, how they should do it and all that kind of stuff.

Right.

And, and then on top of that, I find that most folks don't actually understand what motivates them or drives them towards their aspirational identity, whether it's they're paying attention to it or they're not paying attention to it. Talk to me a little about the, the, the, the understanding of motivating factors and drivers and things and, and maybe uncovering what your core motivators and drivers could be.

Yeah, this has been really, really big when it comes to me because, you know, some of the clients that are coming in, I'm writing their whole talk. Some of them, I'm writing part of their talk because they want to be involved. And everybody's motivated by something different when it comes to.

Making an impact in the world through something as powerful as a TED Talk. Because what other super. What other platform has 40 million people waiting to hear your story, you know? Yeah.

Some people are motivated by impact, and that's it. And what that means, I have a client right now. Her only motivation for investing in us writing and booking her TEDx talk is to help rescue dogs in the world.

Okay. Yeah.

Other people have a business motivator. They want book sales. Right. They, I mean, they want spokesperson deals. They want really big opportunities, new agent for their speaking career. And getting a TED Talk is the right thing for them. Next. So when we look at our career as a whole, everybody is so different. And sometimes we project who we are onto other people.

So it's important to remember, like, I'm motivated by freedom. So when I, and I talk about this, I think it's really late in my book, like maybe chapter 10 or 11. But.

When I think of freedom, I think of space on my calendar. Like, and the reason is because I value creativity. That's another motivator for me.

Yeah.

I cannot be creative without space.

Yeah.

And so when you look at me, it's like there's not an amount of money opportunity that you can offer me. Maybe I'll take it, maybe I'll get distracted, maybe I'll get caught up, but I'm not going to be fulfilled because if I give up my creativity and freedom, I'm not me anymore.

Yeah.

And so I think it's about. There's some people, you know, there's that trend of lazy girl jobs or whatever it's called on TikTok.

Yeah.

I feel like that has a lot to do with the motivator of ease. People are motivated by ease, and I think there's no judgment there. Like, some people are like, I just want to pay my bills and not have to think that hard and enjoy the people in my life. I think there's a lot of content creators out there that actually create some shame on people who just want a simple life. And I think that we all get to be here and create the life we want to have here and take the pressure off.

So I think it's really important that we stop having that judgment and start allowing people to be motivated by what they want to be motivated by and create what they want. Most people coming into TEDx, for me, when I'm writing and booking their talk, they're motivated by influence. They want to have more influence, whether that translates into more opportunity and impact for them, more money for them. All of those things are certainly possible when you have a viral TED Talk. So I, I'm constantly looking at people who come to work with me and asking myself, how can I understand what motivates them so I can meet their needs and respect? And there's some people who come in and I'm like, oh, a TED Talk's not going to help you with that. Like, not the right fit, but I can stay in integrity.

Yeah, well, that's the thing, that's the interesting thing about talking about staying in integrity. One of the, one of the practices that you have, which I think is actually pretty powerful because I know that most of us don't do this, is operating in our, our highest energy state. So I know that you're, you're, you're adamant. Hey, look, I, I, my hours of work are different from most people's work. You know, is that because of the creative space or is that because you're operating in flow? Like, you know, I'm better in the morning. Like, I'm, I get up super early. I'm good from about 5am to about 2pm and I think about 2pm is when you pick up and, and you start getting creative. So how does, how do we, how do we kind of balance the, the approach of operating our truest identity as well as our truest energy status?

I think the most important thing is to get connected to your body. Like a lot of us are not connected to our intuition, you know, Like, I define intuition as knowing what you know without knowing why you know it. There's a wisdom. I mean, there's so much like research on our gut being our second brain. I think in one of my TED talks I point out there's 200 million neurons in our gut. Really? That's the size of a cat or dog's brain. And I've read somewhere that my German shepherd, Jupiter, his brain is like a five year old toddler, you know, level brain, pretty smart. You know, like kids are actually quite intuitive. Right. If that, if anything, that's all they are. They're not caught in the matrix fully yet.

Yes.

Kind of just following their poles towards things. And I think there's something really magical about living that way, being so uninhibited. I think that obviously as we get older, we need to be mindful, we need to use our wisdom and you know, our mental headspace beyond just our feelings. But when we are doing something, ultimately what leaves an impression of us, on us is how it feels. And so you could say in your head, this job offer is great, it's going to get me so far. But if your stomach is sinking every morning you go in there, that's what your life is, that's who you are, that's what you're living, that's your experience of life. And those experiences over time become your life, become how you're spending it. So I think intuition is about the body. It's about listening to those feelings of yeses and nos. People always ask like, what's the difference between fear and intuition? And I always tell them like, intuition's more absolute. It's a little more, it's less emotive. It's more like this is good for me, this is not good for me. And it's as simple as that.

Yeah.

So I encourage people when they're attuning to their intuition to realize how simple it really can be.

Yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of intuition, how would someone know that right now is, is the time to maybe start putting effort into a ted, a TED Talk or, or kind of starting down that, that scenario.

I would say, you know, anyone can do a ted talk, I TedX talk if they feel like they really have something to share.

And I feel like you kind of know when you have something to say and even if you haven't fully teased it out, it's a democracy of ideas. And that's what I love about the TEDx stage. If you're looking to increase your influence, make an impact, establish more of a brand, I don't know anything you could do in a personal branding capacity that's going to be more powerful than a TEDx talk. You know, the Internet is Full of islands. Right. Like I have a Forbes column, I have TikTok, YouTube, my podcast, my book. Those are all islands. No island has influenced me quite like the TedX island, because with 10,000 people looking at me every day and thinking of opportunities for me and getting in touch with me, the amount of possibilities is incredible.

Yeah.

So for anyone who is looking to create more mysticism, more impact and influence in their career, I think it's an obvious slam dunk. So if you're in corporate, you're seasoned, you want to share a message and have more impact and be able to negotiate more salary by positioning yourself as a voice of influence. I think it's a no brainer thing to do whether you work with us or not.

Yeah.

Or you're an entrepreneur and you want to get more clients. Like, I have plenty of people who come through here and their TED Talk is one of the top lead generators for their business to the point where they don't have to spend money on ads anymore, which is pretty impactful to see.

Well, yeah, given, I mean, yeah, absolutely. In fact, you know, it's no, it's no surprise that obviously all the work you've done, you've built a sizable email list yourself.

Yeah.

And I assume part of that came through some of the TEDx work that you'd already done, even for yourself, even before you started working with clients.

Yeah, yeah, I did. And I think that, you know, building an email list, you know, there's different ways to do it. Obviously you can have paid ads, but, you know, not a lot of people listening. Maybe have an extra $30,000 to just throw into an experiment of paid ads or 10,000 or. Yeah, whatever it is. So I would say start blogging. Like LinkedIn is one of the most powerful platforms. There's just under a billion profiles in the world. 200 million of them are in the United States. The impact is huge. There's nowhere else you can learn more about what's going on and what people are doing in this world. So I cannot recommend it enough.

Yeah, well, I know obviously working with you is probably the best way to kind of work on, especially on a TEDx talk and kind of get booked, get, get the talk written. And you're very, very, very, very skilled at that, for sure. Out of curiosity, are there two or three specific things that every talk should have in it in order to, you know, gain the most traction? If someone's kind of maybe tooling around with the idea of building a talk.

One day, I would say the opener really sets the tone, and a lot of people miss the mark with it. So truly being able to open up with something that captivates, captures the listener, is the speaker's responsibility. And one hack is that you don't need to actually open up with something that feels entirely relevant to your exact topic of talk.

Yeah.

So if you're speaking about tips to figure out your life path, you can open up with a story that seems totally unrelated. In fact, that's what I did. If you look at my 2019 TED talk, I open up with my dad in the kitchen getting a phone call that I was kidnapped. What does that have to do with figuring out your career path and life purpose? I drew the bridge as a speechwriter, so I think it's our job to first catch attention. And it's not about being cheap about it. It's not about just being clicky and attention catchy. It's about being a responsible speaker. And that part of your job is getting attention so that you can teach people something and give them the value. So when I'm writing a TED Talk, the first thing I'm thinking is, what are some of the most potent stories of this person's life? And which one do I want to share? Which one is moving my heart in a way that I think can move the hearts of others?

Yeah. No, I love that. And, you know, when it comes to a lot of times, I see some of the most powerful talks that I've seen, there's always a very personal story built into it.

Yeah.

In some way, shape, or form. Right. And then there's. There's. Obviously, you get into the. The, you know, specific skill, those tactics or whatever. How do you help someone find their skill or tactics that ultimately become the, I guess, the meat, if you will, of. Of each of the talks?

I would say one question I have with people is like, if you could only have three conversations with this person about this topic, what would your conversations be? So whatever their subject matter topic is, I would. I would just ask them, like, if all you had was, like, a very small amount of converse, like conversations, what would be the topics? What would you cover? So I have an animal rights activist right now that we're writing for. Like, if you only had three things you could tell the whole wide world about adopting dogs or about animals and why they matter, what would you want to share? And that helps people get very focused on. On what their points are. It's like, really getting down to the necessities. I don't think we live in a world where it needs More long, long, long form content. I think it's important to have maybe a shorter talk. So we've been writing a lot of 10 to 12 minute talks versus 20 minute talks. Um, and that's like three pages typed, so three and a half pages typed. So people need to be pretty freaking concise with what they're sharing.

Yeah.

If that's the case.

Yeah. Well, another thing I know you're. You guys are really gifted at, you specifically is helping people kind of clarify in their personal brand space itself. Should someone build a personal brand before they try to approach a TED Talk? Should they do it kind of as they're doing, approaching the TED Talk or. Or after? In other words, when's the right time to start kind of building your credibility?

Yeah, I would say it really actually doesn't matter when it comes to chat, Ted. The channel is really powerful and it's good to have no matter when. If you don't have a lot of brand credibility, it's going to instantly give it to you and give you a jump start. If you do have a lot, it's kind of the thing you're missing, especially if you want to have a speaking career.

Yeah. So I guess in kind of pivoting off that a little bit in your personal journey, was it the ted. Was it the ted. TED Talk itself that began to catapult things forward?

Yeah, it truly did. Honestly, I probably have gotten more clients in my private coaching practice from my TED Talk than anything else. I've gotten more podcast listeners from the TEDx channel, more book sales from the TEDx channel. So it's truly changed my career. And that's why I'm doing it. Because as a heartfelt writer, I feel like this is the highest way that I can make an impact for people.

Yeah, like I said before, you're making an impact, but you're also getting a scalable impact when somebody else makes an impact.

Yeah, exactly.

Which I love to death. You know, in the grand scheme of things, what is the easiest and best way to actually work with you nowadays in. In. In the TEDx space?

Yeah, I mean, people can reach out. We have a lot of information@ashleystall.com TEDx it's a S H L E Y S t a h l.com tedx and all the information about it is.

DM me on Instagram. Any questions? We're just about full for 2023 and starting to take applicants for 2024. And we're really looking for people who have a lot of heart. Like, we want to Write talks that actually make a difference. I have a lot of speech writers that I pulled from when I worked for Obama and so I'm very involved in it alongside them. We all brainstorm together as a team and.

We'Re just looking for things that move us so that we can write something great. And when we're not moved, we try not to take it on because it's just an integrity thing for us.

Yeah. What are types of talks that have that you've recently taken on that you really enjoy and are trying to share with the world?

Yeah, I think a lot of the talks that do the best on the TED channel in general are personal development related. But it's also a fine line because you can easily get banned from the TED channel if you are in something too controversial, such as like being too religious, not being science backed enough or data backed enough about your assertions. Topics that are cutting edge like psychedelics or ketamine are very trendy right now, but they're also very fine line with the TED channel. So we are constantly evaluating our talks to ensure that once people put in that hard work, they don't get banned.

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. It seems like. It just seems like it's a whole new world. It's all. It's almost why. That's exactly why you have to have a coach, someone to guide you through the process.

Yeah, exactly. It's a planet and I love being on it and it's changed my life and I'm just here to help people change their own lives with it and the lives of other people who need to see what they have to say.

I love it. Well, Ashley, thank you so much for coming on the show. I really appreciate you. You're a rock star and yeah, everybody go work with Ashley. She needs to, for sure.

Thank you. That means a lot. I'm honored to be here. Thanks for letting me share about it and keep shining that light with it. We couldn't enjoy it more, honestly.

Anytime, Anytime. Congratulations on your success. I know I'll see more of it because I know how gifted you are.

Thank you.

I hope you liked that video. And if you did, make sure you check out this next video right here. No matter who you are, there's got to be some component of health and wellness in your life. And I truly bring this back to faith. I truly believe it's a way we can honor God.