IF YOU WANT To Live A Successful Life, WATCH THIS! | James Beck

It's like fertilizing a garden. Seeds of thought. You know, you can always. You can't control your thoughts sometimes.

Yeah.

But you can pluck them.

Yeah.

And it's the. The emotions you feed and fertilize which sprout the actions.

So which of the 50 states are you actually coming to us from today?

Well, I'm in California.

Okay. Rock on.

I live in Redondo Beach. I went throughout the entire United States. And yeah, I, you know, it's not my favorite state. California isn't. However, when I met my wife, she goes, if you want to marry me, we're living in Southern California. Okay. That debate settled.

It was bad.

Right. Well, good deal. Look, you know, you've done a whole lot in the thought leadership and development space of the importance of service. I mean, and obviously it comes from a deep place. But before we kind of jump into the deep place and kind of the background, I. I actually want to understand at least a top level, what you've discovered of how service is so important and what that does to ultimate fulfillment within somebody's heart.

That's a great question. And it's probably best summarized by a question that I was asked actually on the last keynote that I gave. And they asked, it was the Department of Education for the San Joaquin Valley Department of Education. And the first question was, they said, we deal with kids that are suicidal.

Do you have any advice for us? And.

So in answering, my wife told me that was the most profound thing you've ever said. I'm like, really? I didn't even know what I said. I like, play back. And I thought, I thought about what I said, and I remember what I said. But then I was asking, okay, well, why was it easy? Well, I grew up in a foster home. I've been talking to my foster siblings. I'm not a foster kid, but my parents had foster kids. I've been trying to convince kids since I was 3 years old not to kill themselves.

Yeah.

So it was very easy conversation to have. But I basically said, you know, the key is stirring hope. And in order stir hope, the key to stirring hope is stirring curiosity. And the way you stir curiosity is when you look at a person that is suicidal, don't look at them as broken. Yeah, that's a powerful position. They are looking at life, looking death in the face and saying, bring it on, let's go. And that's a powerful place to be. Shootle the way of the warrior, the samurai said, you should live that way. So telling someone that is facing Whatever level of hardship, no matter how significant.

Hey, you're there. Maybe your innocence was taken. You're betrayed, you're broken. You're at this spot, but there is a power there that no one else has. Other. Most other people don't have in their entire life until they're at their deathbed and they make amends and they figure out what's true. But I was like, even though a lot of your childhood was taken from your innocence, May was taken from you, you have a strength that you could have a better, stronger life because of this, if you live in that strength and power that you're facing death with. With. So you open a new neural loop, and the brain wants to close that, and it becomes curious to close that loop to see what it's done. So it's not just, let's see another day. Hey, you know, you can hang on. Maybe life gets good and probably doesn't. Yeah. But explore this with that relentless power that you face now, and you attach service onto it. And when you attach service, you know, one of the. There's four points to my keynote. And the third point is, is that service transforms every relationship, no matter who it is, on a profoundly personal level. And it. It makes life good. It doesn't matter if you're family, friend, foreigner, or foe. You know, something I have beef with. They see how you're like, helping other people. Like, activates mirror Nonji. Like, this person isn't so bad. I probably.

It'll be okay.

Yeah. And so I'm. When you have someone, you know that what is homeless, they what, serve in a homeless kitchen. They're eating, they're serving there, get a job, connect in the community, and boom. People want people to succeed. But the one thing that is the underpinning of every organization and institution is service. So the hierarchy of what controls the world, even both financial institutions, the hierarchy, the left brain model and also the right brain model. So it's the segue between both. So you have. My hobby is functional neurology.

Cool.

So, yeah. You have.

Being able to switch back and forth services the way you do it. So. And the way that happens, you have fight or flight.

Yeah.

You're engaged in fight or flight. And the way you do that is breath. So every. It starts with like, every breath matters.

Nice.

Because your inhale is connected to your sympathetic nervous system. Your fight or flight, sympathy to fear.

Yeah.

Your exhales connect to your pain. Parasympathetic nervous system. So you. How do you paralyze, feel, get into flow state, creativity yeah. So Navy seals use it. Bullets of wisdom by. To stay connected with their buddies and like. And. But it's not a. It's not a modern thing. It's an ancient. It's like a martial arts thing.

Yeah.

You know, and so I took martial arts as a kid, and it's basically. I was suicidal as a kid, as 11 years old myself too. Yeah. So basically my dad was jealous of me and my easy life, and he. He's taking care of all his kids, and he was like, taking all of his rage on me. You exploit a little. I was like, this life sucks. I'm out. And anyway, and then he realized that he was doing to him what was done to me and turned around. That's my book's about. But anyway. Yeah. So it's the shift and the rewiring, but service. What people don't know which will really help them is you have fight, fight, fight, feed, fornicate. There's also a fifth one that's never talked about, and that's forged friendships. And it happens when there's trauma going on, whether in family or in battle, and you serve together a common cause that gets you through forges, and it rewires your reptilian brain in. Through your limbic brain so you can communicate almost telepathically. So, like, those people that go through that, you can look at them, have a smile, and boom. You know what the thought is? Why? Because your minds are wired in that way so you can give and receive information. But that's the forged friendship. And so, yeah, I had that theory. And I call it proactive repatterning. I had that theory. My mom was a functional. Was a head charge nurse in functional neurology or neurology clinic. But.

So, like, I grew up learning about this, and she was just like, don't believe what anyone tells you about the brain.

I'm like, how do you know that, Mom? She goes, that's what all the doctors I'm working with telling me. Like, so, like, everything, figure it out.

What's going on.

What does this do? Poke it with an electrode. Oh, that happens. And now they got a better handle on it. But it's like, okay to rewire it. And that's why I love your. From stuck to unstoppable. Like, it's such a powerful use of words, you know? And it's like, for me, every breath matters. So we talk about that. Offers choice in the moment.

Yeah.

Subjugate your mind to be in a creative flow state.

Yeah.

Then every muscle you flex matters because Your muscles. The. The one area that medicine has never really recognized until the last 10 years was. Is fascia, the collagen fibro system.

Okay.

And you have, there's three. You have the holistic system of the body. You have your capillary system, which deals with matter and emotions.

Yeah.

Your neuronal system, which deals with time and electric current, you know, brain through the activate muscle.

And then you, you also have your collagen fibril system. Well, the collagen fibril system is both. Is a completely different system. Like, it's like three legs of a tripod. And if you're interested in this, I mean you can. I have a long lecture on it. It's all the proceeds will go to International association of Structural immigration to have the government recognize that. So I'm an instructor with it.

Nice.

But yeah, it's like if massage had a PhD. I teach it so high level touch.

Yeah.

Anyway, fascia is where beliefs, belief resides. And so it's the reason why like if you're. Whether you're blind your whole life or you know, Olympics, you win the championship. You raise your arm, you have a victory pose.

Yeah.

Way you hold your body back channels your thought, which back channels your emotion. So belief fascia is first. The way you hold yourself. So almost fake it till you make it. But you hold your body in a way you cultivate. So holding the victory pose in front of the mirror. Right. Victory pose, hands in the air. Like. Yes. Like when you just won first place in the world. You're the first in the world. You have both hands, your lifts are all flex and you're just like.

Yeah.

Why you're first in the world. Every team touchdown. And then doing whatever dance. So it's that ultimate victory moment when you feel and express it, even if a person's never seen it is like hardwired. And so the way we hold ourselves, that's why we know when someone's depressed. They hold ourselves in a depressed position.

Yeah.

We repetitive stress. So. So it's the repetitive choices of our body. They reset every seven to 10 years so you can become a new person the way the soul cells replicate. But then you have the thought that triggers. That's triggered to an emotional change. So like going through what you believe, like guarding your mind, what comes in. And even so like guarding your posture, your breath. So everything matters. Your breath, your posture matters because it'll affect what you think.

Yeah.

And then the thoughts that you said, the seeds of thought, when you interact, you know, proprioception, you Interact with space. That's. That attaches to a thought, to an emotion. So like one of the things that most all body workers know, this you can have an emotional release. When you're getting tissue released, what happens is the emotions of the chemical chain going through your body, your capillary system, which is attached to matter, it constricts around the chemical chain and then years later it releases. And you could like laugh during massage, but maybe you were T boned in a car and we're laughing at a joke and it all seized up. So your body seizes up on that emotion that's stuck in the tissue and it causes pain, causes discomfort. But like the thoughts that you think, you can think differently. And also when you release it, the chemical chain releases and you'll feel the emotion again. Very common in my profession. Weird if you're not used to.

Sounds cool to me.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's weird because like, I've. I've. I was the massage therapist for NBC's the Biggest Loser. American Gladiators.

Yeah.

I've studied all over the world. And so like a good buddy I know. Huh?

Buddy of mine is Dan Nitro Clark. He's a good buddy of mine.

Oh, wow. Yeah.

Yeah, that.

Yeah. When you meet Jedis, it's more like, like, okay, give me some Jedi moves because I know you got some stuff.

Yeah.

But.

So like realizing that. So I teach a class on how to balance the pelvis through self care because it's like the most important thing that I've figured out on my own because usually takes two to four months. And with this class on Beck balance, it just takes minutes of self care. But it's like being able to move freely, interchange the diaphragm with the pelvic floor and activate energy. It's almost like turning on a circuit breaker to your body. So we sit too much as a culture, which throws things out of balance. And so how to rebalance that, but own that on your own. But then the emotions you feed balance. It's like fertilizing a garden. Seeds of thought. You can always. You can't control your thoughts sometimes. Yeah, but you can pluck them.

Yeah.

And it's the, the emotions you feed and fertilize which sprout the actions. And it's an intentional choice and you can slow that down with your breath. And so that was like breathing all these basic things of life, how important they are. So, yeah, I teach. What I teach, though, going to give back is I teach companies how to transform their corporate Culture into a cooperative community by using service. So I gave away everything I owned April 1, 2011, and went around the United States, served a family in every state in order to rewire my mind by living in a constant state of giving. Because, like, I was like, okay, my dad didn't teach me how to be a good man. Tried.

Yeah.

But, like, your dad brings you your. Gives you your connection to the outside world. I know. And if I don't overcome those struggles. But it's part of me.

Yeah. Yeah.

So every state was just destroying the mind and reforming.

So what I thought was interesting, when you were starting to travel around the world and do these small acts of kindness or small acts of service, Some were small, and some were larger acts of service that really meant a lot to a lot of people. They all meant a lot to a lot of people. I was surprised by the fact that you were like, no service is out of touch as long as I can share it with my mom. Right. You know, you were like, I just. You know, there were so many different things. And one of the cool things, I was listening to one of your other interviews that you had not too terribly long ago, and they were like, okay, North Dakota. You were like, oh, yeah, I did this.

North Carolina. Oh, yeah, I did this.

Oh, I did. But I'll tell you what. I'll give you some secret stuff I did.

Okay.

If you want.

Yeah, let's do it.

Stuck from unstoppable.

Yeah.

All right. So things that I don't really share.

One thing that opened me up energetically on my trip, you brought up. So North Dakota, I dug holes from them. I show up and I meet this person. So the way I found people to where I was completely disconnected to, I used couchsurfing.com because you can stay on people's couch for free. I had people stay on my couch. And so I had a good profile people, because I was in la, and I'm like, okay, if you're from a different country, you can crash on my couch. If you're from la, no, pay your own rent. But it developed this community, and. But I'd never done the experience myself, and I'd always kind of wanted to. And I'm like, okay, at least, you know, four of the states across the United States I'm not gonna have any connection to. And I'm gonna find them through this website. For the states would be former Biggest Loser contestants because I worked on the show.

Yeah.

And so, like, 20 of the states were people I knew were friends of mine. And then 30 of the states were complete strangers. So majority were strangers. So I wanted to.

Have a cross section of culture, but I wanted to, like, literally destroy and pulverize my mind and that which was indestructible, like, rewire it and create it through service. So, like, who would I be? I don't know, but this ain't good. I know there's something better.

But when I was. When I was there, the guy said, hey, dig out. He goes, you'll do anything. And he was a mechanical engineer for John Deere.

And I show up and he's like, hollywood? You're from Hollywood?

What are you trying to say?

Yeah. I'm like, yeah, but I grew up on a farm.

Like, I had pigs and chickens. He's like, in Hollywood, man. In Hollywood.

Yeah. He's like, you're from. He goes, all right, I got a concrete bay window that needs to be dug out.

Hands me a shovel.

And it was cracked because when it was raining, water was going in his basement.

Yeah.

And I was like, okay. You know, so I go in, I dig it out. Before I dig it out. I was like, well, hey, do you have a post hole digger? And he goes, what? I go, well, you said you have a skidder. So basically like a forklift. I was like, if you want me to dig it out, it's going to take all day. But if we do a post hole digger here, post hole digger here, pop it through. You just take the chain and lift it up, and it'll only take a little bit. And he goes, that's actually a good idea.

Hollywood.

Yeah, Hollywood. But then I was working on. And I was like, how much service can I do in the time I'm here? And I'll wait, who can I serve in the family? That's it. Little daughter, special needs daughter, had dystonia, muscle disorder. It's like where the wind brushes your. Any hair in your body and you cramp. And so you look at them and they're like this. And they look, you know, awkward and funny, but when you look at. You're like, oh, my gosh. Like the cramp that I get in my calf at night. You're getting it all of your body off constantly.

Yeah.

She couldn't move, so I basically did. I couldn't touch her without her cramping.

Yeah.

And she was supposed to participate in Special Olympics. And I'm like, what? I wasn't trained for this.

Yeah.

I used to make fun of energy work.

As a therapist. It was very Western mindset. And so I. I'M very hesitant in what I accept and very guarded, But I do understand different things. But an ex girlfriend. Did pendulum work to where you weren't touching the body? And I would make. Yeah, I didn't say anything, but I was like, oh, gosh. But I was like, I can't touch this girl. So then I tried it, and it showed where energy wasn't coming off the body because, like, spirals of energy come off the body. And I basically just reached in there and barely touched it in my hand. And it released the psoas from the iliacus, which released some back pain. Come up. Crying. The girl's crying. She's like, I'm not in pain anymore. I'm not in pain anymore. And I was like. It was like a Scooby Doo moment because it was like this thing I made fun of and I followed it and I put my finger there and it happened. And they're all hugging and crying, and the guy basically said, hey, when you first came here, I didn't want you in my heart home. My wife said, yes. And so I allowed it to happen. But I want to let you know, you have a place under my roof, and I've played at my table any day you want it, whenever you want it. Wow. And so, like, having that level of transformation from people that did not want you there, and it was like, constant, man. 50 out of 50. There's some people that are like, I'm gonna pay it forward.

Thanks for telling me.

Let's talk about give back. How did you come up with the idea, the concept? What made you want to take your experience and turn into a full fledged movement?

Because of the transformation I received from the experience. I gave everything away, which kind of reset the mind.

And I was like, I may live in a van down by the river after this.

Because it really did, in some ways drive me insane. But not an insane way where people be like, hey, I want a little taste of that. Like, what is that? Because now life is amazing. It's been great ever since. Painful experience, like losing 75% of my friends, but then realizing, hey, they liked me for the person I was before, not for who I am intrinsically. So it's gave space for better stuff. But basically what happened was when I was going around the country, I was. I experienced, you know, a hardship that happened. And I got to the Navajo Nation, biggest hardship on the trouble thing that happened on the trip. And I show up in the Navajo Nation and these people like, the Trail of Tears.

Yeah.

And I'm like, okay. Probably shouldn't complain too much, James. And. But because I was going through a tough time, the medicine man became friends with me and that you're usually not connected in that community. And basically, I just felt basically as I, hey, come with me. I lead ceremonies and, yeah, you're here. And I literally thought I was going to kill me, man, because we're going in the middle of a Navajo Nation. Like, I was the guy that I was serving, serving this family that runs a hospital there. She's a head. Just discharge planner. And they have a native side, Native medicine side with the hospital, so they serve the community. So, like, hey, being culturally sensitive. And so this medicine man was like, welcoming me, protecting me in a hogan. And he was like, I basically, you know, we. We talked for a second. He's like, you, you come with me. You have pure heart.

This is it. This is. This is when it all ends.

Yeah, Well, I was. I was there. And the guy that I'm hosting, that's hosting me, he's like, I've been here 20 years and they didn't never ask me. And you're here one day, you little punk. Yeah, but they were excited for me. And she. She goes. They invite her because she's with the very man she. He's been before. But like, not in the. Like that, but like, there's a whole ceremony where you give gifts, and it's a matriarchal culture. And. And so he. But we go and like, everyone was like, we go to the middle of Navajo Nation, who's whitey.

And a guy was literally, like, they were like, they didn't like me. He's friends with the medicine man. They're like, oh, nice to meet you, sir. Yeah, yeah. And it was crazy because I just met him and he likes me. But fast forward a few years, I find out that they don't have electricity, running water or coats. Now, I don't know how to solve electricity and running water. I know how to get people there to do that. But, yeah, coats I get. That's an easy one. So, yeah, so a bunch of. Well, a bunch like a few of my friends, handful of my friends, brought a few hundred coats, teamed up with.

Military base March Air Force base in Riverside, teamed up with the California National Lifeguards. Some of the firemen gave and just like Patagonia gave the store down. Just like people just gave and individuals gave. I was like, hey, empty your closets. You have coats that your kids grew out of, or maybe you got fat or skinny. Give them to me. And so, yeah, we took a few hundred, and then another company joined up with us a few years later, and we brought like a few thousand. And so they're like, hey, James, you can come. Anyone comes with you.

Cool.

Appreciate the coats. Anyone else without you.

It's.

But like, it was amazing how service transformed the entire community through one person. That. That.

How.

That I didn't strategically do anything. Yeah, it was like, oh, you need coats. Okay, bring it. Yeah.

I mean, it seems like. So if you take service and you. And you distill it down to the most common denominator, I think it comes down to love. You know, you are loving someone with action, not with just words or pacification. So if I'm hearing all the. All the stories, the one commonality that I've heard through all the stories that you've shared so far is that love appears to recognize love.

Yeah.

And, you know, if you walk in with a servant's heart and you walk in with a loving place, and you're. And you're not there for selfish motivation, you're not there to. For prestige or fame or anything that we would, as American culture, really kind of go after on a regular basis. You know, if you're not doing those things, then inevitably you are in a situation where you can actually open yourself up to then receive the very gift that you are giving. Does that sound about right?

Actually better than I usually say it.

Well, thank you. No, let's be soul brothers.

Yeah. No. Well, you know, the thing is, we're speaking from the same truth. We just came at it from different angles of the mountain. So. Yeah, absolutely everything that you said is completely true. There's.

A talk that I gave to the. The first National Mental Wellness Symposium, talked about the. The six stages of power. So how money chase money chases power. They say money chases love. Can one be true? Truer. And.

Basically like money chases power. So it's like boys and girls chase money, men and women chase power.

Yeah.

But then, okay, what is greater than or equal to power? What do men and women chase? Men and women chase husbands and wives.

Yeah.

And they are about knowledge. You know, you can. You can say to do that, but if you don't know what to do. Right.

And then what's greater than? So you have Schoolhouse Rocks.

Yeah.

Knowledge equals, you know, power, so. Yeah, but what is greater than or equal to knowledge? You can know what to do. What's greater than or equal to husbands, wives, moms and dads? Hey, courage. Yeah, courage. Do it like, chase the ball. You know, the first Time your kid plays a sport and they're just standing there and, like, chase the soccer ball.

Just at the T ball stand.

Yeah.

Swing.

Yeah.

Yeah. And so then what. But what's. What's greater than or equal to mom and dad? What beats mom and dad every time? And anyone in a family will tell you this. Brothers and sisters, unconditional empathy even when you're wrong.

Yeah.

Unconditional empathy is the person that runs alongside you with the bicycle and you're pedaling, thinking you're pedaling.

Yeah.

But what beats unconditional empathy? Love. And that's the grandparents. That's. That is the person that pushes the bike and lets it go, knowing you're good and. Well, you're going to fall down and scrape yourself, but only by doing that are you going to pedal on your own. And that's what you need to do. And that sovereignty shift from me to we to where you are taking ownership of your decisions, that's just a physical manifestation of that transformation process.

Well, it seems like the. The polar opposite of love is always fear.

Which most people would not stop what they're doing, sell off everything their own, and then basically busk across the United States.

I didn't sell. I gave.

Gave. Excuse me.

Gave.

Right. That's even another level of overcoming fear is what I'm getting at.

But the thing is the intention. It's just like. It's just like if you're afraid of snakes.

Right. What do you do? Cover yourself in snakes. Crazy. And then finally you just go, snap. And then you're like. Okay. Right?

Yeah.

So the addiction was to. It was over control.

Okay. So I put things in place so I could not control my environment ahead. So I had to lean into that uncertainty and enjoy and savor that pain. Yeah. In order to switch my mind from a dysfunctional, generational, dysfunctional thought. Which we're all in.

Yeah.

And as we all do this. But this is like. You would speak of it in different words. This is just the way.

Yeah.

Sure. But that shift. The shift can happen. And there's two different mindsets there. And I think this is important to address because it's not really prevalent in society. Transformation, mastership and evolution.

Like servantship, where you have.

Save me a moment will shift and then a lifetime to master. So that's our transformation. Hey. Just. You can do anything but start growing. You plant the seed, then grow. It may take 10 years to get a good crop of fruit, but that's how you do it. Yeah. Stays consistent. But the other one is the savior. Ship, evolution, savior ship. Okay, so to where, like, it takes a lifetime. Oh, I'm always working on it. I'm always working on it. I'm always working on it. Basically everyone that claims a religion that doesn't follow it falls that category.

Yeah, no, I agree with that.

So, you know, and even the verbiage when you look at in ancient texts, they say, you know, master, but it's not like you are my. I'm a slave. But it's like, hey, you've mastered something. I'm trying to learn here.

Yeah, more ship kind of conversation.

Right. And so digging into that.

And digging it to where, Okay, I do this very harsh, traumatic thing. My brain.

Give away everything. I have nothing to hide behind. And it basically like, induced great state of shock and fight or flight. I then submerged myself into the service of humanity in the greatest adventure I can think of. One family in every state. What's going to happen? I don't know. I'm going to film it. It's pretty incredible.

I mean, it's a pretty incredible even just idea, let alone to follow the idea through and see it through. And then I remember one of the things I heard you say on the interview, which I thought was powerful. When a little girl asked, you said, you know, what happens if you don't get to all the states? You're like, well, I'll be dead. You know, which I think comes to that, you know, so we, we talk a lot about being stuck. So stuck is nothing more than not making progress. It's all stuck is right. You're. You're stuck in your finances, you're stuck in your relationship, you're stuck in your head, you're stuck in your identity. Okay, not making progress, becoming unstoppable is consistently making progress. When you tell somebody, I'm not stopping until I'm dead, you're saying I'm relentless in this pursuit. In your particular case, one of the things I like most about it is, you know, servanthood led to what I call mutual love and respect of everybody you came in contact with. It didn't happen right away in certain circumstances, but it did happen in almost every circumstance.

The crazy thing, the only challenges I had were the friends that I knew for a long time. Oh, wow.

Yeah, well, that's because.

So a couple. But it wasn't even a big deal. Like one of the guys said, hey.

There was no big. There was no big issue. It was like, hey, I got paid forward, okay? Or this other person that was just like, just. It was weird. Like when I Went on national news like, she was mean to me. And then I got on national news like, hey, how's it going? Hey, friend. Apparently it's like, oh, yeah, now that I have a microphone, you're like, want to make sure that I ain't going to say anything, but I could.

Well, and I think that. I think so. That's what I want to kind of. I want to. I want to hit this from a different angle.

Okay.

I want to get service as it ties into love and how love then ties into worth and self worth. What you about self worth? Because I know you and I grew up a lot in a lot of different ways. Very similar, both with dysfunctional fathers. Fathers who were trying to father but not fathering well because they didn't know any better. Right. Which screwed up my self worth. I know in hearing some of your other interviews, it screwed up some of your self worth and we both discovered a better path. But how does servanthood or servants or service tie into love and love tie into actual worth? Because I think there's so many of our listeners and viewers that are like most Americans and probably, you know, probably most people in the world. We're all searching for this identity, but we're always searching for the identity outside of self rather than inside of self. Is that an accurate statement? How do you see it?

Well, I think. Yeah. Well, actually, you said that we're looking for stuff outside of self.

Yeah. So, you know, you tie your identity to your worst to. I got a big house, got a nice car, I got these relationships. I'm on stage, I'm on the da, da, da.

Okay. Yeah. See, I would. And I would. I would argue the flip side, that that's an inside of self, meaning you are focused on me, you're not motivation because it's motivating. Yeah, yeah. So the me is the motivation and not the we. So the flip from a youthful mindset is from me to we.

Yeah.

So you have the reptilian brain now, the me mindset. The reason the two elements of power there, you have stewardship and discretion.

Yeah.

So that is a way that the reptilian brain actually helps you survive and not just say the wrong thing. Someone can leverage against you.

Yeah.

So there is a survival, but there's like you're talking reptilian brain, right and left neocortex. You know, how they. The internal, external, and then also the limbic brain, how it kind of brings things together. But service.

I'm going to go and reverse the order. Your self worth, if you feel Worthless. Growing up, my dad always told me I was a worthless piece of.

Yeah.

And words. I mean, spelling.

Yeah.

Literally cast a spell.

Yeah.

And they. They anchor the left brain into a hierarchical mindset that controls a narrative.

Mm.

So. And the crazy thing, what people don't realize is that when you say those words, your mirroring neurons also activate. And part of whatever you say about other people also goes to you. Rubber, like glue, bounces off. Part of that is also true. But also, the sticks and stones would break our bones. That's not true, because the words imprint on the other, but it's negative both ways.

So it's almost like a tacky projection.

Yeah. Okay, so. So you are. That happens. You know, you hear this, especially from, you know, your father or mother. You know, internal, external, different. Different components of being. But, yeah, I thought I was worthless. In fact, when I was in college, freshman year of college, I did not think a woman could ever find me attractive. And when someone. When one. Hit on me. Yeah, I never date anyone.

Yeah.

I mean, but I was like. But someone, like, kind of came up to me, like, hey, I'm interested, you know, I was like. I thought they were mocking me.

And I heard her feelings. I was like, the jerk. And I, like, literally thought she was just insecure. Like, I'm really. And I'm like, totally blow it with this totally hot chick. And I didn't even know.

Yeah.

And anyway, self worth. But what happens when you serve? It's the highest form of every religion. Yogis, Christians, you know, like, it's service.

Well, it's. Because it requires choice, and choice is not subconscious.

And you have to subjugate yourself and ask someone else, how can I help you? What do you need? Okay, I'll do that. And I won't think why, because I have no idea what you're coming from. I'll just do what you say.

Yeah.

And hope it's the best. And you give time with detachment from time. It all starts with being detached from your time. And you give, like. But you also. You have to have a boundary on time. That's why I said three days. Some people are like, this is awesome. Stay forever. Voluntary servitude.

I'm like, sorry, I'm like the guy in Kung Fu. I have to keep moving from city.

Yes, yes, yes. But it's pebble in the pond, not Boulder. Staying there.

Anyway. Having your worth. When you serve someone else, you turn off your mind. You give them the best. You don't know how it's going to react. So the pay it forward all the different services that I did. Like. Okay. I served a lady in Ohio, took her kids fishing. Well, her husband took his life, was from Afghanistan. Soldier that came home and I took her kids fishing. And that touched her because he promised them a fishing trip before he. Before he took his life. And he jumped into a trash compactor. And the boys, one of the boys was like 13 years old.

So, in fact, when the. The San Joaquin Valley of Department of Education was like, what do you say to kids that, you know, how can you help us? I told them how to do that process. I was thinking, oh, it's what I did with Eli.

Yeah.

Melissa's son, after I took him fishing, went, you know, served them. The family, fell in love. Why? Because it was cool. I didn't take anything. I stood in the place of the husband as a man and a father figure to give honor, to tell that boy that he was worthy of a man's time. He is priceless. And took away the sting of that psychological hook that his. That act his father put in him. Because there's all these psychological hooks. And that's the reason why I like your, you know, stuck to unstoppable. Because it's like stuck is to goad, incite, prick, puncture.

Yes.

It's the Evanston language. The origination of language is just an arrow. So it's an arrow that pierces you and keeps you there on the spot. In Russian, it's quilt the stagati. So, like, our minds keep ourselves stuck, but the words transform the brains. And it's also like when unstoppable, there's in and un. But one is a variation. But un is like the opposite. It's not.

It's the polar opposite.

It's not infamous and unfamous. It's. Yeah, you're not famous. No one knows you not. You're famous for the wrong reason. So it's like. That's the complete opposite. But like to stifle or stop. Like, you cannot stop where you're at. So everything that you're doing, like it really wasn't bottled and okay. Worth. I felt like I was worth. Worthless.

Worthless and priceless are very close because there's no value attached. And so love, when you serve someone else, you give them time with disconnected to the value you're showing. Love, no attachment. Give a boundary so you're not just pouring into a vacuous black hole and then tell them, give so others give more. Pay it forward. Or it's an ancient Vedic principle or whatever religion you Want to pick modern or ancient, but, like, let it go and then you see how it grows in their life or not. Some of them do, some of them exponential, like someone transforms whole communities. But it shows you that every action you take is valuable and has worth. And when you turn off your mind and plug into another person, interestingly enough, it shows your value as a human. So it will exponentially increase your value as a businessman, as a parent, and in whatever occupation, because you see where your brilliance is. Because a lot of times the judgments on yourself and the psychological hooks hold you back from what you would actually do. But when you don't have a paycheck causing fear, then you will say exactly what you think and feel. And that's probably exponentially more brilliant than how you've manipulated yourself through those dysfunctional patterns.

Well, it also seems like service, the act of. All right, so a couple different things. First of all, the act of service seems to develop and inspire the maturity of the soul or the will, depending on if you're coming at it from an internal versus a, you know, brain area. The second thing that I. That I pick up on that is you mature through the process. Because when you're actually serving, you can't be taking or receiving. It seems you can't do one. You know what I'm saying? You can't do them both at the same time. You can't selfishly be receiving if you're actively serving by choice.

Actually, if you're truly serving, you cannot stop the flow and interchange of both. Okay, so if you are. If I say, here, here's four hours, take it whatever you want. Or in my case, here's three days. I tell people to start with four hours so they don't get too upset if the person they choose. Because sometimes our pickers broke and we choose, like, our friends that we think are great and they're part of the 75% you should chew away. And this is part of the sifting. But, you know, like, when I was in Maine, I served this, like, hey, here's three days. It was the six degrees of separations. Six degrees of separation, Exploring that. Person in Tennessee set me up with a person in Wisconsin. Person in Wisconsin set me with a person in Maine. Person in Maine set me up with a person in New Hampshire and on down. So I wanted to explore the concept. And it was easy because they were like, this is cool. I got friends in different states. What states do you need? And so I show up and this is the coolest thing. I thought it was cool. But when I experienced it, it's like people wouldn't believe it.

Yeah.

And I'm glad I filmed it. But. So I show up in Wisconsin, this lady has me serve because I want to serve rich, poor, middle class, young, old, Republicans, Democrats. People don't believe in voting. Everything. Gay, straight, undecided, religious, non religious, everything. Yeah, different. Cool and different. Yeah. And. But I showed this lady, she like has lobster waiting for me. It's this picturesque, amazing. I don't even know who it was. And it's this amazing place that overlooks Camden, Maine. This postcard. She has me serve the opera house because her friends run it, but it's a charity and they need help. Okay, fine.

Yeah.

She has me paint her friend's mobile home. The local people that own like a five star, top rated hotel have me, bring me food and like, have me come over, like the best wine and the best food. I thought I was going to like starve and I chewed up the inside of my cheeks and dropped down to like £165 in the beginning. By this time, halfway through the journey, I'm like 199. When I'm like fatter than I've ever been, I'm like, holy cow. I can easily survive on service like thrive and fat. Boy, you need to go on a diet. Yeah. So it was, it was just amazing how I thought.

I didn't realize how it would service. Constant service would put you in a state of flow. And it allows me to see further into the future. And I think that's what service does for you, is it gives you wisdom and insights into your own limitations and removes these things that are limiting your vision. So if you're in a business and you're trying to see where a project should go, you know, a lot of times the thing that people don't realize is because they're run by money and finances, they, they don't honor time in the way that cycles of time should be honored. And it's just like a farmer, like you plant a lemon tree, that lemon tree is not going to produce good lemon. Maybe some lemons. And far, five, six, seven years.

Yeah.

But in like 20 years, it's pumping out like 150 lemons a year. Lemons. But like, you plan it and like, oh, if I put all these chemicals and right, say the right thing and motivate and optimize and optimize it, it can shoot up. Give me 100 lemons in a year. No, it's not going to. So having that like transformation like, it took me six months to rewire to cut the grooves out of my. My brain to where I remove the PTSD from my childhood.

Yeah. Which is interesting because, you know, you know, I work a lot with the military. I go and speak and stuff like that. Reset programs actually have to do. Do another one tomorrow. And, you know, one of the things that used to frustrate me. So I've had a pretty traumatic childhood, you know, and young adulthood.

Right.

And if it wasn't for the small acts of service. Right. So Steve Meyrick, who believed in me when I didn't believe in myself, gave me a second shot that I didn't earn, right? Act of service, act of love, act of grace. Susan Batch, you talked earlier about the story that's in your head, right? The opening, the loop. I didn't realize until you said that, but she actually gave me 11 words that got me off the bridge from taking my life, which was this, too shall pass, and what comes next will be greater. And I was like, what's next? What's greater? You know, And I didn't. I put that together today. But when you look at that, a whole. That whole entire thing, that's gold.

That's gold right there. Because it takes that ancient saying, this, too shall pass. And. And the concept of what I said, but uses a lot less words.

I'm gonna give you credit three times, and then I'm taking it.

You know, the crazy part was, is, you know, that ended up being. Because I chose to believe it in the moment. It ended up being prophetic. I mean, I started the other company that. My first company, when I was homeless, in that circumstance, two weeks later, out of a trash pile. And now that company has grown and been all over the place and continues to grow, thank God. And as I'm looking at everything, I'm just thinking to myself, all these different little investments. In fact, I say this all the time. The greatest purpose in life you ever have is serving the person you used to be. My entire life right now is trying to find versions of myself. People that are stuck, frustrated, alone, isolated, empty. They don't know their worth. They don't know their identity. They don't understand how the hooks you were referring to earlier actually, like, literally hooked into them, you know, and then we break up a concept like, you know, offer value to others. There's a lot of people saying, hey, go out and offer value. Go out and offer value. Extreme value, Extreme value. And here comes along James Beck, and he's like, okay, offer valuing is actually service. And action. And here's how. Service actually leads to love. Love leads to acceptance. Acceptance leads to grace. Grace leads to opportunity. Opportunity leads to profound relationships and profound awakening. You got it. I'm like, amazing, right? Yeah, it's just like, how cool, you know? And I'm sitting here, I'm listening so much because so much of what you said has been my life. It's been my journey. That's why I kind of. I understood that, you know, as you were describing, service and the benefits that come from it and how it kind of takes shape and what it can do to another life.

And.

I care about serving other people because through the journey, my soul, so to speak, has been maturing. The more I serve, the more I understand. The more I serve, the more empathetic I become. The more I serve, the more sympathetic I become. The more I serve, the more I want to listen. You know, I just think it's a really profound concept that not many people have been really putting out into the world. I'm so thankful that you're doing it well.

Cool, man. I, you know, in the beginning.

I literally wondered if any. Anyone would ever care. Yeah, I had a great job in Beverly Hills. I was the managing partner of a post surgical recovery facility. I had about 30 nurses that worked for me. I worked all top plastic orthopedic surgeons. So I was like at the top of my professional game. And I was, yeah, managing partner. So I had a nice place by the beach and I was the massage therapist for the Biggest Loser. At the time. NBC had brought me over because we worked well together for American Gladiators. And so I was making more money, had more respect, Company car, nice place for the beach. Everything was great. Yeah. And I was like, you're mountain. This is empty. Like, you're on call 24 hours a day. Relationship sucks, fall apart from neglect. And you need like, yeah, you're on the wrong mountain. But what do you do? What do you do when you realize you're at the top? That's the problem is most people don't reach the top. But then when you reach the top, that's why people that are really famous kill themselves because they reach the top. They're like this.

There's nothing more. Yeah.

Yeah. And so unless you have service to where you are reaching into the life of. Of another. And the crazy thing is, as you reach into the life of another to serve them, 40% of that is automatically going back if you're doing it altruistically just to help them, like, hey, here's your time, do whatever you want. Don't think about it. Then your souls, they're reaching back into your soul and then doing 40% of. But yours is exponential and growing, and theirs is just that one deep. So as you. As you continue service, transforming your relationship, you know, and it's like, I think.

I think what you're describing is what some people would. Dave Meltzer, for example, he was on the show not long ago, and I love the guy to death. And one of his concepts was, you know, teaching someone how to vibrate higher at a higher frequency.

Absolutely.

And you just articulated that beautifully. As you serve, a resonation comes back to you and you kind of growing out, right?

Yeah. I mean, the universe won't let it not happen. It's literally like, it's law. It's okay. People. People talk to me and act as if I'm something special. I literally just looked at all these religions and thought, they all say service. What if I just started with that and this is what happens and then, like, threw everything else to the wind? Like, everything in my life, it's probably wrong. I think I'm wrong about everything. And if I'm wrong about being wrong, I'll be right. So I'll be right all the time. Because I always think I'm wrong. Cool. Everyone was like, I'm right.

I'm right.

Okay, you're right.

Probably.

I don't know. And what can I help you? And at first they're like, give me some time. And then I'm like, oh, wow, thanks. You're awesome. Thanks. You are, too.

What?

And then, you know what? That's crazy is people that are religious, they're like, always want to tell you what they believe and convince you they're right. I didn't say anything. 100% of the people, by the second day, we're like, on a second, what do you believe? What do you think? Why are you doing? This is cool. And so when you just start from there, it's like all these people, all these ancient documents are calling out from antiquity saying, hey, instead of like, you have to do this. No, they're saying, you have to do this.

Yeah. If you're going to find fulfillment for sure. Well, look, in the last couple minutes that we got left, I want to maybe try to break it down into three practical action steps, because we're going to have listeners and people watching that are like, I get it, I get it. It sounds good. I'm not sure if I've got the courage yet necessarily drop what I'M doing and go across all 50 states. But I want to do more. I want to vibrate higher. I want to give more. I want to be of service. I want to live a life of greater meaning and fulfillment. What would you say your top three steps to get started would be?

I would say.

Start with four hours in a week. One chunk of time. Pick someone to give a chunk of time to and alternate it. The second one is alternate it, alternate it between the four Fs. So put this in the notes. So family, friend, foreigner, and foe. You will be surprised at which is your favorite.

I'm gonna do. I'm gonna guess the foe. Just for fun.

Hey, it's how I got on national News Christmas Morning 2011 without sending out a press release.

That's awesome. Well, check this out. So in the social media world, my team used to get on me because we would have somebody give us some hate mail in the comments for fun, and I would actually talk to them. They ended up becoming some of our biggest followers.

Because I took the time to care.

Yeah, yeah. Well, and the thing is, is when they realize you're a human and you just talk to them because if they're mean, if they're just want to repulse and then you approach them but don't engage.

Yeah.

Then they don't know what to say and they feel dumb and then they'll just walk off and complain on their own because the more that someone's swinging in a ring by themselves, they look stupid. When you get the gloves on. Like, come on, man, I'm right.

On.

Well, dude, I've had a blast, man. Where can everybody else find more information about you and everything you got coming down the pipeline?

There's three places. So number one, give back if you want. The top 10 lessons that I learned throughout the country, I have not created them yet, but I'm going to give one out a month. And just with the, with the footage that I have from around the country and then the questions that I get asked as I do my Q and A's after my keynote, I'm kind of, okay, maybe that will serve people. So if you want that, go to give back.com if you want to learn the physiological, the physical stuff that I touch. Beck. Balance. I teach balance. Balancing the pelvis. And then if you want to book me as a speaker. Awesome. Go to upside speakers. They have some amazing.

Kelly, my friend Kelly.

Kelly. Yeah, Kelly's great. Got trucks, got Ellie Abrams. Yeah, they're all three of them are.

In my next event. All three of them are coming in October.

Oh, my gosh. And like I, I feel so awesome just to be guilted by association. I'm like I'm sitting next to. Huh.

You have to tell Kelly that Stephen said what's up.

Yeah, I will. I will, man. Hey, dude, thank you so much for having me on. Is a blast. It's an honor to meet with you and connect with you and glad we're friends on Facebook and absolutely we're going.

To keep this going. We have to do the CNN near future.

Okay, let me know.

Rock on. James Beck, everybody.

All right, thanks. Thank you.

Take care. If you love that interview, go ahead and check out this next one right here.

I think we all don't realize we're already there. We keep thinking that success is something way over there. We got to find as opposed to like what's already within me that I could share.