Tameka AndersonBehavior Coach | Creator of the THRIVE™ Framework & CALM Method™ at Cultivate Potential Strategies

54321 Changed Everything 🥰 #momlife #trauma #gentleparenting

11 Jun 2025 · 2 min

Watch on YouTube

1:33

In this first‑person video, the speaker recounts a real‑time calming episode with her 5‑year‑old grandson who erupted in a scream toward his mother after being denied access to his room and toy. The grandmother gently guides the child through the 5‑4‑3‑2‑1 sensory grounding exercise, prompting him to name five things he sees, four he hears, three he feels, two he smells, and one he tastes. While the child identifies birds, a candle, cake, and his recent grits, the grandmother validates his disappointment, reinforces that disrespect is unacceptable, and encourages alternative coping choices, such as using the grounding technique independently. She also highlights the use of natural auditory cues—listening for birds—to remind the child to pause and self‑regulate. The narrative showcases gentle parenting, trauma‑informed response, and intergenerational modeling of emotional regulation.

Chapters

My 5-year-old grandson yesterday screamed, leave me alone, don't talk to me, because my daughter is learning to set healthy expectations of him. I sat on the bench and patted the seat and said, whenever you're ready, let's talk. He sat down and I said, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. He knew what that meant because I had just taught him. Then I said, tell me 5 things you see right now. So he began to look around and mention them. Then I said, tell me 4 things you can hear right now. And as he mentioned the birds, I began to smile and say, you hear the birds? That's good. We'll come back to that. Then I said, tell me 3 things you feel right now. He began to wiggle his toes and touch his shoulder. Then I said, tell me 2 things you smell right now. He mentioned the candle and the cake. And then I said, tell me 1 thing you taste right now. He touched his lips. He mentioned the grits he just ate. Then I said, now tell me, why did you yell and scream at your mother like that? He said, I was so mad because she told me I couldn't go in my room and get my toy. And I said, I understand, and it's okay to feel disappointment. However, you don't get to disrespect people because you feel that. I said, what's a different choice you can make the next time you feel those big feelings? He said, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. I can ask someone to help me calm down or do 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 if you're not around. I say, yes, that's good. And remember the birds you heard? Whenever I feel big things, I always stop and listen for the birds to sing.