Tameka AndersonBehavior Coach | Creator of the THRIVE™ Framework & CALM Method™ at Cultivate Potential Strategies

This blew me away! #christianmom #christianmama #trauma

1 Oct 2026 · 2 min

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2:02

In this teaching, the speaker examines how the biblical command to "honor your parents" is often misused to justify abusive behavior toward children. By citing Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:21, Matthew 18:6, Matthew 10:34‑37, and Galatians 5:19‑23, the speaker outlines the biblical standards that limit parental authority, emphasizing that provoking, discouraging, or harming a child is contrary to Scripture. The message contrasts the works of the flesh (hatred, wrath, strife) with the fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, self‑control) as a framework for discerning discipline from abuse. The speaker also links these teachings to contemporary issues such as family estrangement, arguing that misuse of "honor" leads to broken relationships and positions parents as foes rather than protectors. The overall purpose is to equip Christian parents and caregivers with a scripturally grounded lens to recognize and avoid abusive practices, encouraging discipline that builds up rather than discourages.

Chapters

The Bible warns what happens when honor your parents gets used to excuse abuse. Ephesians 6:4 says it first, fathers, provoke not your children to wrath. Then Colossians 3:21 says it with an extended version. It says, fathers, provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged. So the first thing we see is that the Bible has given parents a standard and a limit. Because provoking doesn't just mean yelling or hitting. It's also discouragement. A child worn down instead of being built up. God knew parents would try to justify it any other way. Look what Jesus says in Matthew 18:6. He said it would be better for them that a millstone was tied around his neck and you were thrown into the sea than to offend One of these little ones. In Matthew 10:34-37, Jesus never taught family over everything. He said, I didn't come to bring peace but a sword, and that loving your father or mother more than him has no place in this kingdom. So pretty much you will be a foe to him. This is why we see the large Numbers of estrangement happening. He said that parents will be against child, and that a foe will be in your own house. So how do you know the difference between discipline and abuse? Well, let's look at Galatians 5:19-23. So what does it say? Hatred, wrath, strife—that's the works of the flesh. The fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, self-control. Mistreatment under the guise of parents. Quarantine isn't honor, it's harm.