In this YouTube commentary, the creator delivers a passionate "hot take" that estranged parents are "unhinged" and largely responsible for the growing estrangement epidemic. The speaker shares a personal story of spending seven years asking their mother for emotional presence before ultimately going no‑contact, later reconnecting with limited contact. They recount how their own daughter expressed feeling unloved despite material abundance, prompting the speaker to listen, take accountability, and seek ways to show up emotionally. The video critiques a common victim narrative where parents claim they "did the best they could" while dismissing their children's pain, arguing that such excuses prevent healing. The speaker calls for estranged parents to engage in therapy, self‑reflection, and honest accountability, warning that without this inner work the cycle of estrangement will continue. The piece ends with a call for viewers to comment on the "estrangement epidemic" and reflect on their own contributions to family disconnection.
So my hot take is estranged parents PTSD
leave room for hope. It is empty, and for me, if I were that estranged child, and I would go through major milestones without my parent there and be okay with it. Not have an urge to say Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday, Happy Mother's Day, Happy Father's Day. Nothing. And live my life like they don't exist anymore. I don't know how that equates to love. I don't know how I'm supposed to. Take that and as a parent and feel like I'm loved.
Okay, so I'm not about to, to, to watch all of that, but I'm reading the comments on here and clearly these are estranged parents. Clearly. Because they're saying no one has A great childhood. No one has been the perfect parent, but what our children are doing is vengeful, spiteful, and most of all hurtful. Yeah, cuz we went no contact because we just want to be vengeful. Another one. This generation of kids are completely different. They just discard their parents no matter the sacrifices the parents made to raise them. They never let go of the negative experiences even after the parent takes accountability. Nope, nope, nope. Let me say, let me, let me say this. As an estranged adult child, I made the very difficult decision to go no contact, mostly because I had spent 7 years, 7 years telling my mother how I needed her. 7 years. And so I made the difficult decision to go no contact. Last year I reconnected with her, but I still have very low contact with her. The reason why I decided to go no contact was because of how every interaction with her, how I felt after every interaction. I did not feel loved. I did not feel seen. I did not feel safe. I did not feel significant. And so I— that is the reason why I made the difficult decision. And I hear other estranged adult children saying the same thing. The whole, oh, you know, they don't let go of the negative experiences. No, it's not that. Because here's, here's the thing. Although I never wanted my children to feel the way I felt as a child, my oldest daughter told me when she first started therapy, she told me, she said, Mom, you know, um, I love you, but I I didn't feel loved by you as a child. Oh, oh my goodness. That— I mean, it hurt my heart because I was like, oh my God, I never wanted her to feel that way. And so we begin to have more and more conversations. My daughter didn't decide to estrange herself from me. Why? Because I listened to her. Not only did I take accountability, but I didn't dismiss her. I didn't say, oh, you know, I did the best I could. Oh, you just sound so, so, so spoiled. And my daughter was— my daughter was spoiled. She got everything. She never wore the same thing twice until she was 4 years old. That's how much I used to buy for her. But I couldn't say, oh, I bought you everything, how dare you tell me, uh, that you didn't feel loved. No, I sat there and I listened to her and I was like, dang, you know, she said I was there but I wasn't there emotionally. So therefore I took accountability for that and I said, okay, well, how can I show up for you now? I know I couldn't— you know, I can't make up for what happened in So moving forward, how can we move forward? Oh, and so they're, they're just— let me just say, estranged parents are unhinged. That's what they are. And this is the reason why the estranged families, the community is getting larger and larger. And it's unfortunate because the people who need to take accountability are not taking accountability. They're not Doing the inner work of healing, because that's really what is the problem. And and then there these estranged parents are acting like they're the victim and calling their children narcissists. All of the stuff like what is that? What is your problem? You wonder why your children don't want to talk to you. I wouldn't want to talk to you either. I'm just watching just a little bit of your video, and I don't want to listen to you. So I can imagine somebody who's known you all of their life. I can imagine what they're. Thinking insane, but it's insane. Estranged parents need to, number one, go to therapy. Number two, they need to stop having people saying, oh, you know, it's okay, you did the best you could. You did the best you could, yes, is not incorrect, but it's incomplete, as my pastor loves to say. I did the best I could and I hurt my child. That is what estranged parents That's the message that they need to get. I did the best I could and I still hurt my child. Moving forward, how can I do better? Do better. So my hot take is estranged parents are unhinged completely, and until they decide to look in the mirror, do the work, we will continue with the estrangement epidemic. As a parent, we go If I chose to allow my ego and my wounded heart to snap back at my daughter to say, oh, well, I had a horrible childhood, your childhood was so much better than mine, what do you mean, you're so ungrateful, we would not have a relationship today. So estranged parents, look in the mirror, do some reflecting, and ask yourself this question: how am I Contributing to my adult child going no contact and not feeling safe enough to have a conversation with me. Drop a comment below and let me know what you think about the estrangement epidemic. See you next video.
