Day: 35 is it really no pain no gain?

Okay, today, day 35. So today I decided this morning really early, I don't know, really early, 6 o'clock, that I was going to go for a run. And you know what's really interesting? There was some indecision about it. It was like, oh, maybe I should go to the gym, maybe I should ride a bike, blah blah blah. Like that old indecision like popped up. You know, and I looked at the clock and I started thinking about what, when did I need to complete this in order to get everything else that was on my morning agenda done in time. And I literally wasted 10 minutes trying to decide what I was going to do. And I finally just got to the point, was like, go, just go. So out the door I went and I went running. Now, here's the thing. Both my knees have torn meniscus, and my running is more like a jogging now, right? When I try to sprint, it just feels like those dreams that you have when your feet are in the mud, you're kind of slogging along. I'm sure it's not that exaggerated, but that's how it feels to me. And, you know, about 3/4 of the way through the first mile, like everything in me wanted to quit. And I was just like, just don't quit, just don't quit. And then the mind started coming up with excuses. You better check your heart rate, make sure that you're like, you know, you're in high, like the high intensity range. And I was like, "Well, check the heart rate when we get to the turnaround point." "Oh, you know, your knee's hurting. You better, you better like stop." It was just the brain and all the excuses, right? So there's, you know, it's really interesting. I watched this interview, listened to it actually, the other day with Andrew Huberman and David Goggins. And, you know, David Goggins can be a very inspirational guy, but I don't know that he's someone that everyone should model their life after, right? Because the guy is in misery all the time. He's in mental misery. He fights anguish all the time, every day. Everything is hard for him. So the inspiration, I guess, is, you know, we can go through hard— do hard things. So I thought about David Goggins and running and how he would run on broken leg or broken feet. I think it was David Goggins that did that. I'm not sure. But you know, when I got done with my run, it was only 2.5 miles, you know, I hurt and it's the end of the day now. And I hurt. And so I have to ask myself, was the victory of pushing through something that I didn't want to do worth it in this case? Because I think that we can push ourselves to do things that we absolutely should push ourselves to do and then we can push ourselves to do things out of sheer stubbornness or an inflated sense of purpose that can be detrimental. Now, I don't know in this case. I think in this case I'm going to be just fine. I'm going to be sore because my body doesn't like doing those things anymore. Certain things aren't as resilient as they used to be, but the fact that I have the ability to overcome the mental compulsion, or maybe not compulsion, mental tendency to want to give up, that's a pretty awesome thing. So, and The interesting awareness that I had today was how the habit of indecisiveness can waste time. How it's important to make decisions quick and then pivot. So that's like if you make a decision and it's the wrong one, then you change course, do something different. But making decisions as quick as possible I think is a great practice. And also, you know, believing that you can do something. So the first 10 minutes of my run, all I wanted to do was quit. Like everything in me was, you know, oh, you know, I was so tired. Every step was an effort. It was like, ah, but I kept saying, you know what, the endorphins are going to kick in. Everything's gonna kick in. And it did. It never got easy, okay? It never got easy. But I was no longer— like, everything in me wasn't fighting anymore. So what is it that you have to really step into in your life? And what are the things that maybe are causing you pain that aren't giving you a big benefit. Maybe consider dropping some of those things and pushing into things that actually are worth the effort and give you a positive return. So that's all I got for you. Hope you have a great day, night, whenever you're watching this, and I'll talk to you next time.