In this personal vlog, Tony Stark Policci, a veteran marketer and copywriter, reflects on the first week of a self‑imposed 90‑day "stretch" aimed at resetting his internal habits rather than boosting external performance. He recounts a career filled with high‑earning successes that coexisted with chronic insecurity, feast‑or‑famine cycles, and growing self‑criticism that escalated after a leadership program. A pivotal moment came when his wife's comment about his mood ruining a trip forced him to seek intensive counseling, where he realized he had lost his sense of worth, spiritual identity, and self‑compassion. Determined to break entrenched reactive patterns, he launched the 90‑day stretch to shift from negative thinking, limiting beliefs, and knee‑jerk reactions to a calmer, intentional way of living. He outlines his Day 7 routine—morning reading, making breakfast for his wife, sunlight walk, focused client work, a hard bike ride, nutrition tracking, and conscious effort to prioritize himself. He notes two moments of reactive frustration (dropping a fork, a silent computer error) as data points for ongoing improvement. Throughout, he invites viewers to relate, comment, and consider their own 90‑day challenges, offering his expertise to help others. The video balances candid self‑analysis with motivational encouragement, emphasizing internal mastery over external achievement.
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Hey there, it's Tony Stark Polici, and I'm now on day 7 of this 90-day stretch. It's been a full week, and I want to give you a report about what I've gone through today, but I also want to give you a little more in-depth understanding of exactly why I'm doing this for just complete transparency, and hopefully it'll be something you can relate to. Now, for those of you that don't know me, I've been in in marketing and copywriting for over 30 years. I've helped my clients generate hundreds of millions of dollars. I've had my work create million-dollar days. I've ghostwritten bestsellers. I've built little empires. I've launched brands, blah, blah, blah. But here's the truth. Most people don't know I've never felt truly secure for very long. There have been incredible highs, yeah, but also long stretches of feast or famine.. There's been months where the money flowed and months where I barely made it. And there came a point where I started asking myself, why? Why have I been the guy who makes it rain for everyone else but never quite feels safe in the storm? And the answer wasn't just tactical, it was personal. I mean, I'm pretty resilient, right? I love God and I've seen miracles. So, even when I've been down and out, I tend to keep on going. But last year, I did this leadership program and I felt fantastic. It really opened my eyes to some things. But towards the end of the year, something shifted. I didn't realize it, but I stopped being kind to myself. And it wasn't too long until I saw myself being unkind to others. Like, I'd hang up on telemarketers. I'd snap at people when I was interrupted. I'd get irritated with the constant electronic pings and dings and buzzes that happen all day long, right? I was like Bruce Banner, the Hulk, always a little angry under the surface. Well, it got to the point where I was waking up in the middle of the night with fear. People say they have anxiety attacks, but it's really just fear. Okay. So, too often I was reacting instead of responding. And I kind of was living without intentionality. I mean, I'd like to pride myself on being intentional, but when I look back on it, like, I wasn't living intentionally because those kinds of reactions don't come from living with intention. And I let my mood be dictated by the events and the circumstances of my life. Now, as 2025 rolled around, I started having this barrage of things happen that kept me in a near-constant state of crisis management. I mean, it brought up old wounds and behaviors that I thought I'd left behind. And the final straw came when my sweet wife told me that my mood had ruined a trip that we took together that was very important to her. I had no idea that I was showing up that way and how it was impacting her. It really broke my heart, right? So, I did a deep self-analysis. I took an appointment with a brilliant counselor and I asked for help. And what I saw in this almost 3-hour session was shocking. Like, the bottom line is I had started to resent myself. I had started to feel like, or to judge myself that I was not in a place in my life where I should be. And I no longer saw myself as a miracle who had overcome addiction and abuse. No longer did I see myself as made in the image of God, loved, worthy, blessed. I mean, no wonder I was angry. No wonder I was moody, right? So, I mean, it's kind of like hanging out with somebody you don't like all day long. Hang out with an enemy. So I spent a few weeks practicing being different, really stepping into my leadership mentality. And we can choose ways of being. You do know this, right? Like, you are not subject to how you always are. Like, you get to choose. So the trouble was I had worn these ruts. These behaviors had become so deeply ingrained the subconscious thoughts, all of these things were so deeply ingrained, I really needed to exercise something extreme to break out of it. So, that's when I started what I'm calling this 90-day stretch. Now, it's not to amass money. It's not to hustle harder. Although, if those things happen, fantastic. It's really about resetting how I live. So I'm working on shifting out of negative thinking, out of limiting beliefs, out of beating up on myself, out of impatience, out of reacting to every inconvenience like it's a threat. And, um, you know, because I want to live from a place of calm, loving grounded self-control, not to suppress who I am, but to stop giving away my peace to things that don't deserve it. Because I've realized something. When, when I came out of addiction, I had to focus on healing from the inside out. And as my career took off, I then spent decades mastering external things, you know, schedules, projects, my skills.. But the game we must really master is the internal one. So this stretch isn't about being perfect. It's about being real. It's about building the kind of life where my brilliance works for me, not just for my clients. So you might be wondering, okay, how, how does this apply to you? Well, if you've ever felt like the one who helps everyone else win, Um, well, quietly wondering when it's going to be your turn. You're not alone. But I'm going to let you know, that's a slippery slope and a slippery slide into living as a victim, not the victor. And this journey I'm on might just need to be the journey you, you have to go on too. So, um, if you're along for the journey, thanks for walking it with me. And if any of this hits home, then I'd love it if you drop a comment or hit subscribe. I'll continue posting updates as I go. No filters, just the truth. So now that that's all out, I want to let you know, like, day 7, what was it like for me today? Well, today I woke up early. I spent about 30 minutes reading. Um, I got up and made my wife breakfast. I sat with her and we talked for a few minutes before she took off to go to her job. I spent, um, 15 minutes taking in the morning sun and walking, and then I, uh, got I got about my day doing my work, and I approached it. I've been putting off some things because I kept feeling like they were personal things, things that I needed to do. I needed to order some business equipment. I needed to take care of some things, but I kept putting them off for weeks and weeks and weeks. I was putting them off because I was like, I don't have time for this. I got all this work I have to do. And this morning, I just decided I'm putting myself first. I need Excuse me. This morning I decided, you know, I'm putting myself first. I need to take care of these things, and, um, so I'm gonna do it. And then I worked on my— hello, cat— and I worked on my, uh, client projects throughout the day. I spent, um, 6 hours working on a project for a client. Did the same thing yesterday. I did take a 40-minute break and go on a super hard bike ride out in the hot sun, which was great. And, uh, you know, I took care of my nutrition, all my supplements, ate good all day, uh, tracked my macros, and You know, uh, as I'm coming to the end of the day, I feel like I've won. You know, I've won in the small things, I've won in the big things today. So, um, that's, that's the report. That's where I'm at. One of the things that I'm really trying to manage though is the reactions, right? If something doesn't go the way I planned, how am I responding? And I counted 2 times today where I had one of those knee-jerk reactions. One was when I— it was really silly, to be honest. I dropped a fork as I was moving my plate from the table to the sink. I just knocked it out. Of the plate and I was like, damn it. And I just kind of had to laugh at myself like, oh, there it is. You know, that silly little behavior trying to hang on. And the other one was just something ridiculous where I made a mistake in my computer, but I didn't say anything. I didn't verbally respond. It was just like that air frustration and I caught it. So this is something I get to keep working at, right? Because there are patterns worn in, and this is a judgment. I believe there are like patterns worn in my brain, these grooves, these ruts that we get into, and I get to shift out of those. So again, if you're watching, if you're sticking with me, please comment. Please let me know what you're going through. Let me know how I can support you. I am responding to people that are commenting on the different social media channels where I'm posting this. So if this supports you, if this edifies you, if this helps you, if you're struggling in your own life, walk this with me. I invite you to step into your own 90-day challenge, whatever that looks like. And if you want me to help you construct something, I'm happy to do that. One of my skills is I'm super great at helping other people figure out their problems. You know, actually, I'm pretty good at helping myself figure mine out too. The struggle that I had is that I stopped paying attention to me. I stopped making how I felt a priority. And it's really weird because I take taking incredible care of my body, but I wasn't taking very good care of my heart. And, and by heart, I mean how I feel. So I digress. I think that's it. Thanks for watching, and I'll see you again in the next video.
