44. What's Your Life Theme? (Simple But Not Easy)

And along the way you hit potholes, speed bumps, crazy people. Sometimes you have to help people, and that's part of directing your life too, because every step could go up or down. Even if it's a struggle, often if you allow it, you're going up those steps towards progress, and that's where you want to be, because progress equals happiness. My wife says this intro sounds like a conspiracy mystery. So I'll stop that voice and tell you, this show is for you, to get you on the track you want for your life. I'm gonna share encouraging educational content, hopefully entertaining, that will help you direct your life. Hey everybody, this is Direct Your Life. I'm Tony Suriano, your host, and I am excited because I have a book coming out called Direct Your Life or Someone Else Will. Will, and in today's episode I want to share a little excerpt from the beginning with you and bring up one of the chapters and challenge you to take some action and direct your lives because that's what it's about. Okay, let's get into it, and at the end I'll give you a little challenge, and I'm going to share a little story that kind of connects the dots. So here's the opening. To my book, directing your life is simple but not easy. It's not about controlling everything or everyone. It's kind of like the Serenity Prayer: change what you can, accept what you can't, and continually gather the wisdom to know the difference. Outstanding directors show up as their best selves. They live in joy, rain or shine. They are present with people. They follow their heart. They admit when they're wrong. They risk being rejected, embarrassed, ostracized, and even hated for a meaningful pursuit. When you stop drifting and start directing, you'll know it. But when you're drifting, You look up one day and you can't figure out how you ever got so far away. Far away from that relationship, your health, your career, and most often yourself. Someone else was directing. But your life is your life, and it's meant to be full of laughter, connection, growth, and meaning. Better than any movie. If you want to stop the reruns, take back control of what you can and let go of what you can't. It's simple, but it's not easy. It starts with hyper-awareness and sustains with relentless drive. Magic that feeds your soul and everyone around you. The good news? There's a proven system that can lead you through your own hero's journey so you can consistently direct your life. And it is my absolute pleasure to present it to you. Take a seat in the director's chair. This is where you belong. That's true. This is where you belong. That was the excerpt. I hope you enjoyed it. And I wanted to flow into that idea. This is where you belong, and it's not about being selfish. It's just about being in alignment with what you care about. Because if you're not in alignment, if you're not going after things that excite you, everyone else feels that ripple of hell that you exude. So my question to you is: What is your theme? For your life? See, when you're making a film, when you're writing a film, every great film has to have a theme, a central connection, a central question connected to that. So I ask you, what's your theme for life? Last episode, if you didn't listen, take a listen. It starts with what is the opening image of your life? Because you have to know where you are to really know where you want to go. And if we're thinking about theme, that's just the next level of that. So what's your theme and how do you get there? How do you figure it out? I want to start with a short little story about me and martial arts, and this just connects everything. And it's really funny because it seems like The outcome of this story has helped me and affected me multiple times over my my life, so you might be able to relate. I hope you can. But I'm training martial arts in Santa Monica, California. I'm going strong. I've been in there for a couple years, and my instructor, my master, we call him Kyosunim Antonio Goodwin Kyosunim. He Was drilling the class. We were already going a little over our time, and we're exhausted. And guess what? You don't get to have water during class. You drink before and you drink after. And we're doing like 500 kicks back and forth the down the the do the dojo, and it gets really tough. And I put my hands down on my knees. And my head lowers, and he screams at me, "Head up, Suriano! Come on, Suriano! There's more in you!" And he's just pushing, and and I'm like in my head, and I'm thinking, "Oh my gosh! This guy's kind of like he does. Does he understand I didn't have water? I mean, I'm pretty tough. I've done some things, but this is crazy. Like I'm done, and now he wants to do another fifteen X Y and Zs. I don't remember exactly what we were doing at the end." But it was like harder than what we did the whole class. And he just kept saying my name and cheering me on. Come on, Suriano, another kick! Come on, front kick, go! Front kick, go! And I respected him and I wanted to grow. I wanted to challenge myself. But if he wasn't there, I may have just called in for the night, had some water, and just said, yeah, I did pretty good. But he was there, he was coaching, he was pushing, and that helped me develop my theme. And there's been a couple of those in my life with people yelling in my ear with good intentions, and you know who you are. So that theme was essentially my lies are my limits. Because what happens when you're in a situation where you know you need to break through but you start lying to yourself and saying like, this is enough, I I should just go grab some water. You know, I've put in my rounds and I'm not going to finish. Like, I can't finish. That's a lie and it limits you. So for me, one of my themes in life is my lies or my limits. My lies or my limits. Do you have lies that are limiting your progress? Yes, we all do. And when We have these limitations, that's when we stop directing and that's when we start drifting. And when you drift, it sucks. You just don't feel alive. You kind of switch on autopilot and you just see where you end up, and you're living within your limits, and that's not living. My lies were my limits. What is your theme for your life? Quick pause. If this resonated with you, I want to keep the conversation going so you can stay in alignment, get motivated, and implement weekly with my free newsletter. Go to tonysuriano.com/newsletter. Real stories, mindset shifts, psychology, creative breakthroughs, all on directing your life. Go to tonysuriano.com/newsletter. And now back to the episode. How do you figure that out? You really just self-assess and score yourself in each of the important areas in your life. So for instance, career, personal relationships, fun, adventure, 1 through 10, where are you? This will help you assess that, dang, I need to either come up with a theme that gives me more adventure, or I need to seriously consider shifting things around. Because you have to balance things, of course. So what is your theme? I'm going to keep asking you, what is your theme for your life? And is it strong enough to keep you going? Because you need to be relentless towards going after what matters to you, and that's when you know you're directing. When you're obsessed about showing up with your best self, being present with people, and just, just going for the big goal, the unobtainable goal, you're just lit up like a Christmas tree, and that's directing your life. And along the way, you hit potholes, speed bumps, crazy people. Sometimes you have to help people, and that's part of directing your life too. Because every step could go up or down. Even if it's a struggle, often if you allow it, you're going up those steps towards progress, and that's where you want to be because progress equals happiness. And it becomes a turning point, just like when I was in that martial arts class and he kept chanting my name and, and Just helping me, cheering me on, pushing me. Like that was the turning point that I said, "Oh my gosh! There's more in me. There's so much more in me. I'm not done." And sometimes it takes another's belief to get you into that mode, and then you start directing them, directing and directing, and eventually you get yourself in that mode because there comes a point in life. Where other people are just not screaming and cheering you on. It happens a lot when you're going after something that you care about, or you have this crazy dream. No one understands it. Apparently you need to be able to summon that energy and direct your life, and that's what it's about. I hope you're enjoying this. I hope you're smiling. And by the way, if you're loving this stuff, please check out the Apple Podcast area or the Spotify area where you can rate and review the show. It really helps. And also share this episode with someone. I wanna share and spread this message about directing all of our lives, because when we do direct our lives, we are more of a pleasure to be around. I know when I wasn't directing my life and I was drifting and I was in reaction mode. I was a bit of a wet blanket. Anyone that knows me longer than 12 years— okay, let's say 10, I don't know, maybe 10 years— they know that there was the wet blanket Tony. He wasn't as fun all the time, and he wasn't directing. He was just drifting and reacting. So if that's you, congratulations, you're here. If it's not you and you just want to progress and direct more, That's awesome you're here too. And if you're still listening, you're the one that's doing the work. And it's even more important that you stay relentless, double down, feel good, create adventure, and find the theme for your life. And you can have different themes in different areas. That's the cool part, because your life is better than any movie. Don't have a life that is a sucky movie that you keep rewatching and watching and watching. Would you ever do that? You wouldn't do that. That's insane. So stop that. Stop the reruns. Take back control of what you can, accept what you can't, and enjoy the journey. Enjoy the progress. So that's the challenge for you. Where are you believing a lie that's keeping you small? What is the theme of your life? Rewrite that theme and make a move this week that proves it wrong. It's simple, but it's not easy. So take a seat in the director's chair because that's where you belong. I love that you're here. Thank you so much for tuning in. I'm Tony Suriano, and I wish you the best. Now get out there and direct your life! Life!