Stop Sabotaging Your Growth: Kenny Santucci’s Proven Methods

You could either crush yourself on that first round and be a bag of shit the second round, or one of the things that will keep you younger, healthier, more accountable, more efficient. I get shit on this all the time. It is the single best drug that you could possibly take. Everybody wants to take antidepressants. The goal should be to get stronger. And it's not just a physical strength. It's a mental. It's emotional strength. How do I get people stronger? I want to be able to do everything I could right now at 40. I want to be able to do it at 80. And if I drop dead in the gym, great.

Welcome to the Path to Purpose podcast, where I share incredible conversations with amazing humans who went through a pivotal shift in their lives that have put them on their path of purpose, profit, and impact. My name's Zara Khata. I'm a student, serial entrepreneur, and life coach. I went through my own transformational journey where I'm now committed to living life of inspiration, education, and empowerment. My intention is to share these conversations so they inspire you to also walk your Path to purpose. Welcome to the Path podcast. I'm really excited today because I have a friend who. Who flew in from New York City to be here with me this weekend. He is one of the speakers at the Mind, Body, Soul event. And he is also someone that. He's kind of a new friend. We met earlier this year in Miami at our friend Giovanni's event. And, you know, Gio put us at the same table together because he had a feeling. He knew that we were going to get along. And sure enough, as soon as we sat down, you know, we started talking about fitness, about working out, having a.

Lot of the same demons.

Yeah, we literally. Many parallels to our backstory. And, you know, it's one of those friendships where you just kind of know, like, hey, we're going to be buddies. We're going to hang out, you know? So when Kenny saw what I was doing with Gerard with the money, sex, power and mind, Body, soul, he's like, yo, how can I get in? So here we are. Kenny said yes, flew up to Toronto. We just finished a group workout with a bunch of guys from the event. So if we're a little sleepy, it's because we had a killer workout. We hit the ice bath, and now we're just, like, coming down off of it. But it was awesome.

Yeah.

Kenny, thank you so much for being here.

No, thank you for having me. Hey, brother. Yeah, it's. It's great to jump on podcasts. I Get asked to do a bunch of them all the time, but it's like ones where you admire the host are always the best ones. No, thank you.

So, yeah, I appreciate you saying that. Appreciate you flying up and being here and. Yeah, man, that workout today was amazing.

Yeah, I wanted to, I'd like to keep things simple. I think it comes, you know, when I first started out in the fitness industry, you think you know everything. You're like, well, I'm young, I'm active, and that's who people want as a coach. But the wisdom I have now, after almost 20 years of doing this, you know, working out from the time I was 13 to 41, going through the ebbs and flows and watching the industry train change and kind of struggle, having my own struggles, have my own pain, have my own injuries, and then dealing with, at this point, thousands of clients that I've dealt with. I try to pinpoint what my, what the person in front of me, whoever that may be, the 10 guys that we had today, try to pinpoint what might be some struggles that they might be having. Simplify it, make it easy. And kind of the three things that I kind of teach everybody is one, consistency is the most important thing. Accountability is second to the people around you and, you know, whoever you're working out with. And then the intensity is that final layer. It's, you know, what am I trying to do, what am I trying to accomplish? And if I, I increase the intensity, then I could get more on the out.

Yeah.

So.

And it was definitely intense.

Yeah.

And what I loved about the workout, because, you know, it was a full spectrum. There are guys who barely work out and then guys who, like myself, been training over 30 years and this is the type of workout I normally do. Like, you know, I'm more of like kind of weights kind of guy. I mean, I do circuits every now and then. Yeah, we did like, it was less than 40 minutes. It was less than a couple of minutes at the station. You know, whether it be riding the assault bike, whether it be doing the, the push ups, dumbbell curls, and just that intensity and the, the, the volume. Like it, you up.

Yeah, yeah. And you, like, you could get intensity at a volume, you could again, intention intensity at a weight, you could again intensity at a speed. It depends on how you, how you want to break it up and like what your goals are. And in that you'll notice how it affects your nervous system. Right. Like when you do strongman stuff or heavy weights, weightlifting, powerlifting, you know, those things tax your nervous system. But you don't feel it right away. The next day you're like, God, I feel like I've been drained. You know? Whereas when you do high intensity stuff like this, like what we're doing today, with a lot of the volume, you feel it right away, it kind of burns you out pretty quick. So there's definitely different types of effects on the nervous system. And, like, you know, I try to figure out, all right, everybody here, Kind of. I wanted to ease everybody into it, get you guys breathing, get you guys moving, right? And then slowly let you guys dial up the intensity. You know, it's not on me to be like, hey, hit harder. You know, my goal isn't to put you through pain. My goal isn't to break you down. My goal is to get you better. So how do I get you better? It's like, well, you got to test and retest yourself. And that's basically what we did. Yeah.

And doing the two rounds back to back with a minute break in between, that was hard because, you know, the first round, you're like, you're banging out 40, 45 push ups, and by 15 on the second round, I was fried.

Yeah.

Oh, my God. What happened here?

So now, like, with that information, with that data, like I told you guys, now, you could dose it out and say, okay, if I really ramp it up that first round, I'm going to be dead on the second round. So now you could basically build out how you would build out intensity or how you would build out continuing to build volume through that. You could either crush yourself on that first round and be a bag of the second round, or you could level it out and say, okay, since I only I got 40 that first round, what if I shoot for 20, 20, 20 now I'm getting more work in. You know, everybody always thinks, like, I got to hit it as hard as I possibly can. Today. It's like, no.

Well, you told us to 40, bro.

What?

You told us.

I said the gold standard. The gold standard was 40 in a minute, you know, And I said, try for 40. Right. I want. Because this was just like kind of a testing phase. Right? There's a difference between what we do on a daily basis and, like, testing and to see where we're at. So I wanted to see where everybody was at. And obviously you and a couple of the other guys are just monsters. And then there was two or three guys I know who probably haven't sniffed the inside of a gym and months, if not ever, I will say those.

Guys, what they said afterwards. Was they were actually surprised at how well they did because a couple of guys were intimidated. Like one guy said, you know, like on the drive down, he was actually quite nervous. He's like, he didn't want to be embarrassed. He didn't want to not be able to keep up. And afterwards he said to me, he's like, wow, I'm actually really shocked at how well I did. And that has a lot to do with the fact that because you paired us up and there was that accountability and there was that support and, you know, everybody was cheering everyone on. It was like, that's what really, you know, gives you that extra energy to.

You're going to start to see that that's the secret sauce.

Yeah.

Moving forward in the next, like three to five years within the health and wellness industry, everybody's like, optimize myself, optimize myself, optimize myself. But what I'm trying to teach people is that one of the things that will keep you younger, healthier, more accountable, more efficient is relationships. I think we downplay relationships. I think we downplay friendships. I talk about this a lot because I'm 41 years old and I'm single. And you know what that's like.

Yes, I do. Thanks for reminding me, Kenny, as I'm 50 and I'm single, but it's all good.

But people, people always look at that as a negative.

Sure.

But I'm glad I waited.

Yeah, I would have been divorced already.

I say that all the time. You know, I have some lady friends who were divorced and had kids and now we're looking for that second crack at life or don't. Aren't really sure what's left. My mom was my father for 46 years. My dad passed away in 2019. My mom is now living this single life as a 70 year old woman. You know, and what most people always say when they're like, I need a significant other, I don't want to die alone. Well, unless both of you go in a plane crash or in a car, you're probably. One person's probably going to die before the other one. Right. You need to know how to survive on your own. You need to know how to make yourself happy. And what I think and just this is just my opinion, what has gotten me through some of the toughest times. You know, obviously I've had significant others in the past, but it's always your friends that you go back to. And I think people take friends for granted, you know, those good relationships. One of my best friends right now, he Has a wife, two kids, but every once in a while he's like, dude, I need you. You know, and I'm like, I'm here, I'm here for you. And I think people shouldn't take for granted those good relationship that they have. You years, you build a relationship with somebody, have this togetherness. And I'm not saying don't have a significant other, I'm just saying don't take for granted the other people that you always fall back on. Yeah, that's super important. You know, the Harvard study that they talk about the people who live the best lives, long lasting friendships, and that's what gets you through those hard times. Have a significant other, have that person next to you. But you know, also cultivate and make sure you take care of those other people in your life that you might end up going back to. My mom, my aunt and I always call it the first wives club. There's like three or four of them. And this is what I see firsthand. You know, one of my best friends who's with his wife for 20 years, he ended up catching his wife fooling around. He's got three kids, he barely gets to see them on holidays. He spends his holidays with me and my family. Like I hadn't seen him for four, five, six years. And now that this fell apart, it's like, I'm happy that he's around, you know, I want to be able to take care of him. I'm always happy to have more people around. I love having people around. Owning gyms has been such a blessing in my life because I never have a shortage of people around, you know, so my ultimate goal for everyone or, you know, my advice to a lot of people out there is cultivate those friendships and don't take them for granted and, you know, water them every day. You don't have to. And good friendships, like we don't talk every day. But you know, you called me up and you're like, hey, do you want to do this? I'm like, yeah, I'd love to. I haven't seen Gerard in 20 years.

Crazy.

So. And he was like, yeah, let's have, you know, it's, it's as if we, you know, yeah, we never skipped a beat, so.

And you know, there's studies that show that there is a direct correlation between the quality of life level of happiness you feel and the depth of your relationships.

For sure.

And you know, one of the biggest killers and causes of suicide is loneliness. And as we get older, you know, our circle gets smaller. And sometimes, you know, we lose touch with our friends. They get married, kids move away. Sometimes we, you know, don't have as much in common with our friends anymore. And it's really important to find like minded people, people that you vibe with. Like the minute we sat down and started talking, it's like there was relatability, there was, you know, a commonality in our story, in our values. Like you and I and Gerard, all love so many of the same things and it's important. Like those guys there today, most of them who came out for the workout, they don't know each other. Those guys could all be great friends, you know, and for many of us, you know, as we grow older, we evolve, we mature. Sometimes the friends we grew up with, we don't quite vibe with them anymore. And what's important to know is that you could find a new community, you could find a new tribe, you could find brotherhood. And you know, brotherhood is something that I'm really leaning into and I'm really putting an effort into. That's why like when I do these events, these events are as much for me as it is for them. Because, you know, a lot of my friends who I grew up with, who I was very close with for, you know, 20 plus years, they're married, the kids, some move to Miami, some move to, you know, all over. And I don't have that connection anymore. And for me, I need to hang out with guys that we speak the same language. We share the perspective of, you know, of high performing men who want to be the best version of themselves, you know, and, and the, the, the impact and the benefits of community and being with like minded brothers is so powerful, especially you know, with the mental health crisis and issues of men dealing with depression, anxiety, addiction. You know, being with like minded men who can speak and express is so healing. And you know, there's a study that shows that women live longer than men because women have each other like the first wives club. To emote, to express, to share, to cry, you know, to release the, the emotional, you know, that, that push down, suppressed energy that happens. You know, we, we as men, we push it down. We don't want to talk about it, we're embarrassed, we're ashamed. We don't want to appear to be weak and not strong, you know, and that's why men are. Three out of four suicides are men. And it's tragic, you know, loneliness, addiction, mental health issues, predominantly men. And that's because we don't know how to express ourselves. We don't Know how to share.

Well, you know what? I. I always throw it back to extremes, right? You see the extremes on either end with health and wellness, with emotion, depression. You look at something like school shootings right here in Canada. You guys don't have a problem with it. It's a. Runs rampant. I was. We were in high school. I was in high school when Columbine happened. And that was like, holy, what the is this? Somebody went into a school and just started shooting up the classroom. It was unheard of. Now it happens every other month in the United States. Crazy. What's the commonality? It's all men.

Yeah.

It's all unhappy.

They're alone.

Lonely basement. Yeah, exactly. It's like the story writes itself. You see somebody, you're like, yeah, like it's a common joke and it's sad and it's. You know, I'm not making light of it, but it's always the same type of guy. Yeah, but it's always a guy. It's never a woman. No. So women release their emotions in a different way. Guys do terrible crazy like this that you're seeing guys nowadays spending tens of thousands of dollars looking for this brotherhood, looking for these outlets. I want to go on these extreme weekends where it's like, I'm out in the fucking woods and they're pouring cold water on me, and I'm crawling on the beach and sand and shit. Guys are looking for an outlet, you know, And I think what you're doing with mind, body, soul, and a lot of these other guys are looking for this stuff because you were told, don't do. Don't be like this. You know, our generation was told, hey, don't be like this. Don't do these things. You know, guys go to the gym to let out aggression. Guys go hunting to let. These are all just outlets for guys. It should be more socially acceptable for guys to let out their emotions so we don't have mass shootings and people blowing up. I mean, it's crazy, but that's where it all stems from. Loneliness and depression. I mean, I think this. All this stuff starts to go hand in hand. I tell people, you know, I. It's just. It's the hammer I have. You know, whatever your tool is, that's what you're going to use. And my hammer is fitness, you know, And I tell people, like, there is. So I was lucky enough to fall in love with this at such a young age and understand the impact that it does. And I didn't go to school for it. I just have 20 years, 25 years worth of knowledge and education in this and self exploration and exploration and other people. You never finish a workout. I've never had someone finish a workout and say, I shouldn't have done that. I feel worse than I did before I started. You know, it is the single best drug that you could possibly take. Everybody wants to take antidepressants. I get shit on this all the time when I say it on social media. Everybody wants to go fucking talk about the problems. I'm not saying don't. I'm saying do. Before you start talking, start doing, because that will be a better outlet for you doing both. But if you have 20 minutes and you ask me what in the hierarchy is better, I'd say go do some shit, you know, take care of yourself. And it's not selfish to go and go to the gym and do that for yourself first. I have a buddy I was just with. He's my best friend and we were just down in Florida, and he's like, I need to go work out. It's go work out this morning. He's like, dude, my days was significantly better. He's got a wife, two kids, a huge business that he runs. He's like, I need to do this more often. I said, you got. You need a network of buddies down here. He's like, yeah, but it's hard to find guys. This is one of my best friends. Yeah, you know, it's hard to find people. Like, he, he's. He's now in. What the hell is it? Boca.

Okay.

But like, he used to live in New York, and every day, me, him and three other guys would work out. When we were in New York, you know, him, I had this network of guys in New York that we'd all work out together. And now who lives in Connecticut, who lives in Boston, who lives in Florida? So I have a new group because it's. It's easy for me. I own a gym. But there's a lot of people who just need a network of people that, you know, we met and we're like, oh, we got a lot in common. Like, there are guys out there going through the same.

You came to an event not knowing much about it, not knowing who was going to be there. You just said yes to something that intuitively you just said, yeah, you know what it. And you're. You're the kind of guy who says, yes, yes. And for your buddy in Boca or some of these other men, you know, any men watching, you got to step out of your comfort Zone, you got to be willing to take a chance. You got to be willing to be uncomfortable, walk into a room, be like, I don't know these 20 guys. But yeah, I'm going to like, just go with it.

Here's a sad reality, is that so many people are so cheap with the themselves, right. You'll go and buy dumb all the time. Yeah. Cars, watches, all the. Why don't you take 1200 bucks, 1500 bucks and invest in yourself because that will last so much longer than some of the dumb that people are buying. I took a buddy of mine to the Staccato Ranch. So it's this gun company in Texas. And he's like, dude, I've never done something like this. So it was like me and 10 other guys. I brought my friend, I was like, hey, could I bring this guy along with me? I brought him with me. He's one of my best friends my whole life. Out of shape, overweight. I've always tried to get this guy to work out. He owns a bunch of businesses, very successful when it comes to finances. But he's, you know, he's on six different fucking medications, you know, blood pressure medication and heart, you know, and he was around all these guys who take care of themselves. They're all 40 to 50 years old. He's like, I need to do more of this. Yeah. He's like, I would have paid ten grand to go do that again. And I said, I know, I. But like, it takes you, whoever out there is listening, if you were that type of guy, like me and you, to pull those people in, right? And to be like, hey, there's there's other out there. You just need to say yes to it and you need to make the investment in yourself.

Yeah.

You know, because he's one of these who's got, you know, fifteen hundred dollar Versace shoes. I go, buddy, when you look good, you don't need 15. You can wear Nikes and still, you know, you look just $30 T shirt. Exactly.

Walking through and feeling great.

Yes.

You feel good about yourself because when.

You'Re a fat bastard, I mean, take offense to this or not, or cry about it, but like, who you mad at, me or you? You know, so when you look good, you could wear anything.

Yeah.

You know, so it doesn't matter. So like when you're wearing a triple X, you know, Balenciaga shirt, it doesn't look as good as if you were wearing a large and you filled it out, right? And that's. I didn't write that rule that's just the reality of life.

And when you look in the mirror and you don't like what you see, and you feel the guilt, you feel the shame, you're sabotaging your ability to attract abundance. Everything is vibration and frequency. And if you know that you're stuffing your face full of shitty food, you're not going to the gym. You don't feel proud of yourself.

Yeah.

And after, like I said, you leave the gym. What do you feel? You feel proud. You feel grateful I did that. You know, you look in the mirror, you're like.

Yeah.

You know, that feeling is what allows you to attract more abundance into your life.

Name your three favorite movies.

Oh, that's a good one. Well, I love Interstellar. Like, I'm kind of into movies that.

Are, like, inspirational sports movies.

You know what? I'm not a big sports guy, so I don't know that I'm the best person. Well, I like.

I. I bet there's not a guy out there.

Yeah.

That didn't watch Rocky.

Okay. Rocky. Yeah, yeah.

And say, oh, yeah. I. Yeah, great movie. Won an Academy Award, went on. The franchise is worth, what, billions of dollars? Yeah. There's not a soul out there. Men and women.

Oh, you leave the theater and you want to start running stairs. You want to start shadow boxing.

I just want to. This video the other day of a guy filming his son, okay. Watching the first rocket. The kid's like 2 years old. He's in a diaper. And he's going along with the montage, Right. Dropping down, doing the push ups, jumping jacks. He's like, you know, doing all this stuff. And here's this little kid who doesn't understand what the hell's going on. And he's following along with this because it's almost like a level of inspiration for him. People love seeing an underdog story. He did the hard work. That's what we admire about Rocky. That's why everybody loves it. No one loves the story. I mean, a lot of this is why a lot of people are so disenchanted with, you know, aside from him being a complete wacko, but like a Donald Trump story, here's a rich guy who became more rich who continues to do rich guy shit. The story we love is the Arnold Schwarzenegger story. Yeah. Came from nothing, came here, became great. Like, there needs to be some level of struggle for people to start admiring it.

Yeah. They gotta relate to it.

Yeah. People need to be like, hey, I'm down and out right now, but if I work hard And I push, then I could get to where I'm trying to go. So it's like, if there's no struggle in your day or your life, then you're probably thinking the same way about yourself. It's like, well, I didn't try, so why would I win? Yeah. If I didn't attempt to get in the game, why the fuck should I get a trophy? Right. I deal with men and women on a daily basis who are like, I want to get better, I want to meet somebody, I want to move on, you know, and increase where I'm at at my, in my career. I go, well, how do you think you do that? You need to start improving on what you look like. Your business card is when you walk in the door, what you look like.

Yeah.

Again, I didn't write this rule, but when you walk in and somebody's attractive, man or woman, they turn heads. Yeah. There are men and women who walk in the room and they own it before they even say a word. And that, and that's.

Yeah, exactly. So. And again, some people may get triggered by what I'm about to say. But I coach a lot of realtors and if you walk into a showing you're 60 pounds overweight, on a subconscious level or a very conscious level, the person may think this guy can't even control what he puts in his mouth a hundred percent. If this guy doesn't have the discipline, commitment to stop stuff in his face, how can I trust this guy to handle my 3 million dollar transaction? Now, some people may disagree that that's not true, or maybe that's prejudice or whatnot. But the truth is, is you walk in, you're looking good, you're confident, you're fit energetically, you feel confident because you trust yourself.

You become magnetic at that point.

Exactly. Yes. That frequency is attracting the abundance. Now, when I meet someone since 40s or 50s, he's fit, he looks good, he's well dressed. I know this guy, he is up in the morning, he's in the gym, he takes care of his appearance, he has self respect, he has integrity. And a person who at that age looks that good, this is happening by mistake. He's been doing it. Now if, if this guy can train and take care of himself for 30, 40 years, I know he's going to return my calls. I know he's going to do his due diligence. I know that when he brings me a property to look at, this guy has done the work. But when you see someone who's fat, who's Sloppy who is not put together. I'm sorry, you probably don't know what.

It is, but you don't have respect. And now, are there outliers? Of course there's outliers in everything, but on a whole, most people who can't take care of themselves and don't have respect for themselves because it is a level of respect for yourself. If you don't have respect for yourself, how could you have respect for somebody else?

Yeah.

Right. So it's. It's embedded in our DNA the same way. Like, we hear a loud noise and we get scared. We see somebody who's not taking care of themselves. Well, if I have the choice between the guy who's taking care of himself and the guy who's not, it's inevitable. We're always going to go with the guy who's taking care of himself because it just. He's. If. If a woman's looking for a mate, she's like, well, this guy could clearly take care of me, so I'm gonna go with him. And if I'm working with somebody, I'm like, well, I'm going to go with this guy because he just seems like he's more on the ball, even if he's not.

And for the women that go for the guy who's overweight, out of shape, but got lots of money, she's going.

For all the wrong things. It's not good.

We know how that's going to end.

Yeah. It's not like, again, we didn't write that story. That story writes itself a thousand times over, you know, so, speaking of struggle.

You know, I'd love for you to share a bit about your backstory because, you know, we've chatted before just on how we got onto the fitness path. You know, I dealt with racism and bullying. I played no sports growing up.

Yeah.

So for me, when I discovered the gym, I realized, holy, it's me versus me. I don't need anybody to pick me. And when I found the gym and I put the work in, when nobody was counting my reps, nobody gave a. Of us in there or not. After three months, I noticed some growth, some changes. And the gym is what taught me discipline, commitment, taught me resilience. And I attribute all of my professional success to what I learned in the gym. And I'm so grateful for those little pricks who bullied me. And, yeah, those. I thank those who never picked me to be on their team because it taught me, you know what? I. I can prove myself. It was all about proving myself to others, but now I prove myself to myself. That's why I did two triathlons is something, you know, because I want to prove myself that in my 50s I could be in the best shape of my life.

Absolutely. So I grew up really heavy as a kid in New Jersey. Again, I have a very similar story where it's like, I wasn't getting picked. I couldn't get a girl to piss on me if I was on fire, you know, And I was very unhappy with myself. And at 13 years old, I looked in the mirror, I was going to a eighth grade birthday party, and I looked at myself and, you know, everybody at school that day was talking about, like, oh, who might kiss who and blah, blah, blah. You know, it's like 8th grade that people were talking about. I wasn't even mentioned. I wasn't even there. And I go, well, this is my fault. At 13 years old, I realized that this is my fault. So when people nowadays tell me, well, I don't know what to do. I don't know where to go. In 1995, maybe that was 96. How. What was the fucking Internet like? There was no social media. None of this shit even. Even was a thought. So I started getting muscle magazines and, you know, and I was like, I'm going to start working out and doing all the things that the people I admire do. I was always into comic books and, you know, action movies. And I was like, well, if I'm gonna look like these guys, I gotta start doing the shit that these guys do. Lifting weights and running and doing all this stuff. And when I started to change myself, that's when people started changing the way they treated me instantly. Again, I didn't write that story. It wrote itself, right? People will treat you different when you start taking care of yourself. So for me, it's like, I. I needed to make that my life's journey, you know, So I understand that struggle. And people always like, well, you haven't been heavy since you were a kid. You. When you're. The most traumatic things, if you were abused as a child, if you were heavy as a child, if you were picked on, as. There are adults, 30s, 40s, 50s, that still deal with the trauma and work through the trauma that they felt as a child. Now, if you're in your 30s and 40s and somebody picks on you, it doesn't have the same impact. No one's going to therapy because you're like, oh, this guy's been picking on me at work. No, it's always like, my Family issues when I was a kid, it's always the traumatic shit that happened to you because that's when you're the most impacted by those things.

0 to 14 is when we develop our belief system and what happens to us during that age. So somebody picks on us or we're not chosen to go to the prom or whatever. We develop this belief we're not.

That we're not good enough, good enough.

And then through cognitive bias, we will look for. Or is it unconscious bias? Anyways, we will look for. Unconsciously. We look for reasons to validate that belief that we have 100. And then that belief develops our perspective. Our perspective develops how we see the world, how we respond to it. And that will create the patterns that we have. That patterns create our behavior, that behavior creates our personality, that personality creates our reality.

For.

So the people who say, oh yeah, you know, love just isn't for me or I'm big boned or, you know, I always get screwed.

You hear all that shit.

Any of those stories, it's rooted in what happened usually between 0 to 6, up to 14. And a lot of the work that I do coaching entrepreneurs and high performers is understanding how they're sabotaging themselves as grown men and understanding the belief they have about their behavior. And you take it back, bend back and back to their childhood and you realize it's because that it could be sometimes the smallest incident that happened when they're 100% when you're a kid and like something insignificant happens now as an adult, but when you're a kid, it's so monumental. And that plants that seed. And even though we get older, that seed is still in there.

Well, it's as your brain is developing that takes up so much space in this empty box, right. And to get it down, right, as we get older, it's like our brains are formed. Like we don't even remember. I can't tell you what the fuck I did last week, but I could tell you the first time I got beat up, the first time I got picked on, the first time I felt uncomfortable, the first time I felt unwanted. You're probably. I mean, just yesterday on the plane, like the stewardess was being just absolutely annoying. I'll forget about that in two weeks. But I remember all these things that happened to me as a kid. You don't remember things that happened to you when you were, when you were do. When you were younger or you remember the things that happened to you when you were younger, not when you're older.

Although I will Say sometimes things are so traumatic that happen when we're younger that are. It'll actually get locked into our, like hidden into our subconscious.

Oh, for sure, for sure. Oh God.

And, and that's often when the deep, deep trauma will, behind the scenes, sabotage certain things. And that's why a lot of people who have addictions, they're trying to numb and suppress this pain that they constantly deal with that they just can't get to. Like, what is that? And that's why sometimes, whether it be breath, work, meditation, coaching, plant medicine will allow them to tap into that pain that is so deeply rooted, embedded within them, so they can release it. And then again, women process these traumas by way of talking, by way of, you know, expressing themselves to one another. But guys, we just push that down.

Never. Yeah, I've buried more than I could possibly imagine. I don't even like digging at it back up.

And I believe that stuff that we bury and push down, that's what creates cancer. That's for sure.

Disease, I tell people all the time. Right. Again, I have no formal training in any of this, but I've dealt with cancer patients that I've trained and I've worked with so many different demographics of people. The stress that we put on our body, whether it be through relationships or good stress, is great. Like going to the gym, working hard, running, you know, high intensity workouts, those things are great and they'll improve our lives. It's the levels of stress that manifest in other ways. Right. Hair loss, alopecia, psoriasis. These are all, you know, viruses and bacterias in our body that come out of stress. Like it's way. It's a surface level of like letting your body know, like, hey, this isn't good, I gotta get this out.

The body's trying to push it out.

Yeah, yeah.

There's a book. The body keeps a score.

Yeah.

And you know, it's, it's again going back to the belief system. Something happens so we get dumped or somebody is rude to us. We have this perspective based on what happened when we were young and there's this trauma. And trauma is just unprocessed emotions. So we have. So let's say we cheats on us. Let's say we're abused as a child because we don't know how to process that experience. The energy of that emotion lives within us. And that emotion, that energy, the frequency creates disharmony, which creates disease. And as other things trigger that in life, because we don't process it, it lives within us. And the body will try to tell us, yeah, in its own way what's going on. Like you said, might be alopecia.

So, yeah. So I read the book back pain by Dr. John Sarno, and he talks about a very similar thing. I dealt with some serious back pain from 2020 to 2022. And every doctor I went to was like, this is a hardware issue. We need to fuse your spine. We need to fuse. And I was like, I didn't do anything to my spine. Why would you cut my back open and fuse my spine? Which will lead to a hundred other problems, muscular issues and, you know, rotational issues. I'll deal with a hundred other issues and I probably won't get back to a hundred percent if I ever do at all. So I read this book and they talk about the nervous system and how the nervous system is affected by stressors both mentally and physically. And that nervous system, your nervous system, is just your body's way of being like, hey, there's something going on here, you need to treat it. And there he's done case study after case study. I had a friend who I went to high school with, who, you know, we're still friends to this day. When he was in law school, he was so stressed out and nervous that he gave himself Bell's palsy. So the whole side of his face was sagged as soon as he graduated, instantly back to normal. Like, stress will you up. And you need to be able to get it out in different ways. And again, my hammer is the gym. Yeah, go to the gym, take care of yourself. Figure out again, like I said today, you don't have it. There's no written science that an hour is the optimal time to work out. It could be five minutes, it could be 10 minutes. Get that stress, stress the body in a good way so that it gets rid of the bad stress. Yeah.

And the thing with the stress, it builds layer upon layer upon layer and you just become accustomed to it, thinking, well, that's the way life is. And we live in a society where no pain, no gain, you got to hustle and grind. You know, we're, we're taught that, you know, it's okay to live in this overstressed situation, and obviously it's not. And whether it be going to the gym, whether it be meditation, breath, work, going for a hike, you need to find which modalities, help you to reset your stress level, help you to calm the nervous system, because otherwise you'll keep going and going and going until you can't. And the body just says, okay.

You're not shut down. Yeah.

You're not paying attention. Boom, there you go. And now you can't not notice what the body is telling you.

No. And, yeah, it's got it. It'll shut you down as much as you think it will. And now there's. There's also good stress, right? Like, for me, I kind of get turned on by more work, you know, I want to work. I, like, struggle. I like, hard. For me, a. A good day isn't like, oh, I'm going to go sit on the beach and drink margaritas. I don't give a shit to do that. I don't drink. I'm going to be sitting there doing nothing. I rather go and win and accomplish things. Like. So for me, it's like, while I was building out the event this year, I had an opportunity to open up a second gym. And I'm like, this is going to be tough. Let's do it, you know? Or like, when somebody's like, hey, I'm gonna go run. One of my clients was like, hey, I'm gonna go do this triathlon this weekend in Atlantic City. You want to come with me? And I'm like, yeah, I'm not doing anything. They're like, you're just. And they're like, you're just gonna go run a triathlon? I go. The else am I doing? Yeah, I might as well.

Now, when you say triathlon, are you.

Talking about swim, ride, run, swim, bike, run? Yeah.

Swim, bike, run.

Yeah. So this was like, Olympic distance.

Okay.

Took me, like, four hours. Okay, five hours, something like that. But I like that. Like, two weeks from now, I'm going to go to my buddies who I go do jiu jitsu with. They're like, hey, we're going to go to Nashville to go to the Nashville Open. You want to come? I'm like, I'm open. Let's do it. Now. Some people, that would stress them hell out. I'm like. I kind of get butterflies in my stomach. I'm, like, kind of nervous. Haven't really. I haven't competed since, like, August. And I'm like, yeah, I'm looking forward to it. I mean, I'm kind of scared, but I'm kind of excited about it, too. And those are the best type of situations coming up to this, right? When somebody signs up for something like this, you should be kind of. You should be kind of nervous about it and be like, I don't. I don't know anybody. It's going to be weird. But I'm excited because there's so much potential on the other end. If I just come with open arms and invite all these people in who are also looking for the same thing. This could be one of the best days of my life, right? So I encourage people to do shit like this all the time. Go and try something. You know, two years ago I did an event called the fittest at 40. I was so afraid of turning 40. And it was like one of these things where I remember being like 20 years old and looking at guys who are 40. And I'm like, fuck, that guy looks like shit. Fat, miserable, his wife hates him. I'm like, I never want to be like that. I'm. I'm like, what is 40 going to look like for me? So from 39 to, you know, the year I turned 39 to 40, I'm like, all right, I'm gonna be the fittest I possibly can at 40. So I started doing jiu jitsu and I did, I did within the year. I did the marathon, I did a triathlon, I did my first jiu jitsu tournament. I did two CrossFit competitions. I was doing all this shit because I'm like, I'm gonna be in the best shape of my life at 40. I don't want to be that guy. And that's a choice. Just like this was a choice and what I encourage people to do. And I was like, hey, listen, I'm doing this if anybody wants to come along for this ride. So I had like six people, men and women, six people. And I was like, listen, it's pretty cheap if you think about it. I was like, it's 750 bucks for the year. And every month you check in with me and every month I'm going to give you different goals to set and I'm going to work with you guys one on one. One of my clients who's become very close friend of mine, he took me up on it. He's like, I want to do this. And he used to be about 300 pounds, probably five, six years ago. He now just did the Navy SEAL swim, which is a three mile swim in the Hudson river. Along with doing like hundreds of push ups and pull ups and all this stuff. He just did a 50 mile run. He did his first Iron Man. Like this guy is an animal. And he's like, I look forward to these days because it allows me to challenge myself. And this was a guy who's never ran a race in his life. And every week, every month I was like, hey, why don't you try this? Sign up for this, come do this CrossFit competition with me. Like, that's how hands on we got with it. And he just absolutely fell in love with. I had another guy who's never even seen the inside of a gym. The only athletic thing he's ever done was ballroom dancing. This guy now was 280 pounds. He's now under 200 pounds. He comes to the gym all the time. He's ran his first 5K. Like, he's like just the way this motherfucker walks through the gym. Completely different. Like, he used to like drag his feet and kind of quiet and shy. Now he's like a loudmouth, you know? So I love. The best part of my job is watching people grow. You know, I. And what led me down this path was one of the worst things that happened me, right? And I never understood why certain things happen. But my mother and my grandmother were always big fans of saying, like, you know, things happen for a reason. Everything happens for a reason. And you know, sometimes I'm like, I don't believe that. But, you know, but it always holds true. And like I said, I was on television. I like, I was fat, I got on television, I was treated like I was a real celebrity when I actually wasn't. Right. None of.

No, clarify. You were on television on MTV. MTV, okay.

Yeah, I was on MTV from like 2005 to like 2011.

Oh, wow. Six years.

Yeah. Okay. And I was. And I did very well.

What was the show called?

It was called the Challenge. The Challenge, okay. Yeah. So it's still running to this day.

Fat, when you were on it or you.

Okay, I was, but, like, not as fit as I am now.

Okay.

I was drinking, I was going out, I was partying, I was eating out all the time and stuff. Now it's like I'm way more dialed in. Anyway, got on the show. I was pretty successful on it. I, at the time, I was arguably probably one of the biggest names, if not the biggest name. I used to work, I was shooting commercials with them and I was hosting shows and I was doing all this shit. I was canceled before it was even a cool thing to do, which it seems like everybody is nowadays. I'm not, you know, condoning the behavior of anybody, so I'm sure some jerk off troll out there is going to twist my words somehow. But, you know, it happened to me. I was accused of some. That in my opinion is one of the most awful things you could possibly do. Taking advantage of a woman. There Was no truth held to it. Right? Everything was. I was never even seen a court. I never paid any money. It was just an accusation. But in the court of public opinion, this was on the Internet. I lost millions of dollars over it. I lost tons of opportunities over. Didn't allow me to work in that area anymore. At least I, you know, some. Some were my choice, and some were other people's choices. And I didn't want to be in that world anymore because I just. You're around people who are reckless with their own lives in your own right. And I don't like to be in that. I like the world I'm in now where it's like, I help people improve. I don't want to be around people who just are unhappy with their own lives and they're willing to pull other people down with them. So for me, it was like, why'd this happen? Why am I accused? Like, the only thing I think that's worse than taking advantage of a woman is taking advantage of a child. And I'm like, these are two. Now. I could justify, you know, stealing if I had to for my family and friends. I could justify killing another because there's definitely times when in a fit of rage, I'd like to beat the out of somebody. And that's why I loved, you know, contact sports. I've always loved. I wrestled all through high school and college. I played football. I, you know, do jiu jitsu now. You know, I think part of being a man is being able to control that rage. And, you know, doing these types of sports allow me to do those things. I think more people should do them. I think kids should do them. I think it teaches you a level of discipline. I think it teaches a level of. There's always somebody out there who's gonna kick the shit out of you, so understand that and, you know, be respectful to other people. However, you know, that happened, and it allowed me to shift all my focus towards the gym and do what I do. And that. I think that was God's way of being like, okay, hey, you're done with this chapter in your life. You'll probably never leave if I left it up to you, so I'm going to force you out. And it was a good way for me to shift gears and do what I do. And the amount, like, I don't even like talking about it because I don't like crying, and it gives me goosebumps. But the amount of people's lives who reached out to me. I have emails and Christmas cards And birthday cards and thank you cards from people who are like, you changed my life. You saved my life. Like, to me, that means so much more than anything I did on tv. I, you know, when I was a kid, I was like, oh, my God, to hold up one of those big fake fucking checks on a TV show would be so cool. Yeah. And I did it three times, and none of it feels as good as, like, helping one person, you know? And I, and I truly believe that people are meant to service other people. We're all meant. Whether you're an accountant or you're a doctor, a trainer, a garbage man, your job should be to do the best job you possibly can to make other people's lives. These jobs exist because there's. That void needs to be filled. Someone can't do it, so you need to do it for them, for the betterment of everybody else. So be really good at what you do and love it. And if you don't love it, go do something else that services you so that you could service other people the best way possible. When you're in the best shape of your life, you're going to be a better employer, you're going to be a better friend, you're going to be a better lover, a better husband, a better father. Do those things that make you happy so that there's less animosity.

Right.

That there's less anger within you. You know, when I'm having a good day and I feel good, I work out, I eat well, people are like, oh, you're in a great mood. I'm like, trust me, I could be a. But, like, I. I calm my demons by doing the things that make me happy.

Yeah. And you inspire those around you.

Yeah.

You know, because often what happens is after a few months of my clients working with me, people around them will start to notice, be like, yeah, what. What's going on with you? Like, well, obviously physically, they'll start to lose weight, but the shift in their confidence. Like you mentioned that guy who walks through the gym now.

Yeah.

People can see that he's transforming in some way. And then people be like, well, that guy was almost £300 and look where he is now.

Yeah. Yes.

That guy can do it.

Yeah, yeah. You change the trajectory of the person and then the people around them. Absolutely. Yeah. And to me, that, like, I couldn't imagine doing anything else. That's why people are like, what are you going to do? I was like, as morbid as it sounds, I put it. I just put it up on Instagram. Today, as morbid as it sounds, I go, I want to be able to do everything I could right now at 40, I want to be able to do it at 80. And if I drop dead in the gym, great. That's where I want to be.

Yeah.

I don't want to die in a hospital bed or, you know, on some beach being like, I just had my last tequila sunrise. It's like, what's. Who am I helping there?

You know? And last week I was hosting a retreat for 10 of my guys, and I said to them, you know, if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, I would honestly be able to say that I've lived an amazing life and I'm proud of who I've been come and I'm only 50, and I know I got a long way to go. And I think that that should be the goal for people. Are you proud of who you are? Proud of what you do, whether you're a garbage man, whether you're a teacher, whether you're a trainer? Are you proud of who you are? And not just who you are, but who are you for other people? You know, because it's. I. I've done some epic shows in my life. I've had lots of companies, cars, girls, all the stuff that a single guy would want, just like you. The work that I do now lights me up more than all that, any of that stuff. And when I'm taking my final breaths and I'm transitioning out of this dimension, am I going to think about my Maserati? Am I going to think about that model? I'm going to think about my client's children and who they are because their dad did the work. You know, I'm going to think about the impact that I've made. That will be my legacy. And my hope is that everybody gets to experience that at some point in time in their life. Because when you taste that, you realize that's the gold. That's what it's about. But see, most people, they're so caught up in their ego, in their false self, just trying to prove themselves, trying to feel worthy, trying to follow the model of the matrix of go to school, get good grades, get a good job, make money, work hard, find a partner, have kids, buy a house. If you're lucky, you buy a cottage or you buy a boat, you retire by 65, you're dead by 67. What life is that?

Retirement is the stupidest idea to be me? Yeah, right. If you're like, I'm going to work this miserable job and Then one day, hopefully, I could stop doing it. And in my last years, enjoy life, or think I'm going to enjoy life. You know, I was lucky enough at a young age that I got a job at a shipping yard in New Jersey. And everybody who got that job is like, this is the best job. You don't get to do anything. I go, I was so unfulfilled, and it was such a drag to me. And the people were happy down there, just had zero ambition to do nothing. And I'm like, that's fine, because it only makes my job a little bit easier to go and crush, you know? And I. I still haven't reached that point where I want to, and I probably never will, because I. Whatever I do in life, I'm just like, well, I could have probably done it better. Anything that goes wrong, like, what was my fault? What could I have improved on? What could I have done better? I'm not blaming my parents or my teachers or my old boss, right? I don't even blame the people who accuse me of. You know, I always say, what did I do that put me in this situation? And how could I now improve that? And, you know, my dad and my mom tried to do the best possible job. I truly believe that they just didn't have the drive or the experience and the knowledge to do anything else. And if my parents had it their way, I would have been a cop in New Jersey and then retired in 25 years with a pension and all. And I got hired as a fireman in New Jersey. I took the police test, and I was like, dad, I don't want to do this. And I fight with my father all the time about, I took it when I was 18. He made me take it again when I was 23. I took it multiple times. And I was just like, I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. And I was on television at the time and stuff. I was like, I can't do it. You know, finally I got called when I was, like, 29, 30 years old. I'm going through the process. I'm like, I fucking hate this. I don't want to do it. And I had a choice between going all in on the fitness thing or continuing to do this. And his whole thing was like, well, what are you gonna do when you retire? I go, I don't. If I do what I want to do and become really fucking good at that, I can make more money than I could pot. And now I make money, but I don't value the things that people like a fancy car, watches. And I don't give a fuck about jewelry. I don't even, I don't own a piece of jewelry. Nothing. This is the most expensive thing I wear that I have. Garmin watch. I wish Garmin would send me a new one just because I just don't value buying stuff like that. Like, I want to be able to have money so I could do more with, like, throw bigger events and take care of more people around me. Like, that's what gets me excited. I, I guess I'm lucky in that regard that, like, I don't value all.

This other that brings you fulfillment and that's where you see your value.

Yeah.

You know, for some people, having that fancy car, that expensive watch, that's the value that they're putting out there. But if somebody sees you valuable because you got a fancy car, a nice watch, what does that say about what you have to offer? And I know that because I used to be that guy, you know, I believe that I had more value to offer, but my perceived value was what I had to project because again, hurt little Zarek, who didn't feel good enough growing up, you know, now as an adult, needed to have all the fancy things for people to like me, to accept me. Right. And because you have tapped into your purpose, you've tapped into your value. You realize you're changing people's lives by way of your ability to help them transform their bodies. You don't need all that superficial shit. And you know, it's funny, because I was talking to one of the guys over lunch. I said, you know, I like driving a Porsche. I like wearing an nice watch, I like getting dressed up, I like going to fancy restaurants and you.

And I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Like, I know guys who really love that.

The difference is, though, before I needed it, before my ego needed it to validate myself. Now I want it. I want. Because I like it.

Yeah.

I don't need it, but I want it, you know, because when I left Toronto, moved to Costa Rica, I was riding quad for four years. I couldn't afford anything nicer.

Yeah.

You know, now that I'm back in the game, I'm making money again. It's like, yeah, I can ride a quad in the jungle and I could drive a Porsche in the city. And I'm just as happy doing either because I've realized my value in who I am and who I get to be for others. You know, what I'm Saying. And, you know, when we sat down, we started talking. I didn't know much about you. I didn't know about the TV thing. I didn't know about the. The gym. He didn't know about my back. We just knew, like, yo, there's a vibe here.

We're getting along. You know, I think there's a chemical reaction that happens when you're with someone, you know, it's so natural. I think that it's one of those things that maybe we'll discover later on.

Yeah.

I think there's definitely a frequency that happens between people where you're like, I don't even know this, but I like them.

Yeah. And. And I trust him, you know?

Yeah.

Again, that's the thing. When you trust yourself, when you're a man of integrity, you don't have to sell yourself. No, people trust you because it's like, truth has a frequency that pierces the logical mind. It's just like, I like this guy.

Yeah.

I'll fly to Toronto, do event. Okay, cool.

You know, it's like, anytime I've had people and anybody who's doing anything worthwhile out there will have people rip them a new on. On social media, whether it's Twitter or Instagram or whatever. It is, what always felt good to me and what I always relied on is the people who I'm close with, who I'm friends with that I vibe with. Like, a guy like you. You didn't know me from a hole in the wall. We vibed right away. I like who you are. I like what you're all about. It was so simple and easy and, like, seamless to be like, yeah, I'll roll with this guy. If this guy likes me, I must be doing something right, you know? So that's how I feel. And that, like, that's why I value friends so much, because there are guys I'm like, I'm friends with him, and it's. I'm so proud to call him a friend, you know? And I think more people should take pride in the people around them. And if you don't take pride in the people around you and you don't even like the. The people around you, then you probably don't like yourself.

Yeah.

What does that say about you? Why are you hanging out with these people? You should admire your friends. You should be like, oh, man, this guy with me, I like him. Yeah. I like myself. I should. Who am I attracting? Right? Who's vibing with me? Who? What's that frequency between us that I vibe with these people. Because if I'm a junkie, degenerate loser, you know, and that's who I roll with, it's like, what am I doing?

And that's how Gerard showed up in my life. You know, Gerard is someone I've admired for years. I've paid to be a part of his courses, you know, followed him online, learned a lot from him. And then just. He hit me up one day, you know, like, yo, I like your vibe. I like what you're doing. I want to. Let's collaborate. I was like, damn, okay, Gerard, you want to come collab? Okay, cool.

Yeah.

But that is only because I had to get over my shit, my work. I became someone that was a vibrational match for him, you know? And that's the thing. If you don't like who you are again, you look in the mirror, you don't trust yourself. You feel guilt, you feel shame, you feel disappointed in yourself. How are you going to attract high vibe people?

Yeah.

A high vibe partner, high vibe money.

Yeah.

You can't. The universal law, like, attracts, like.

You know, I have this woman who comes to the gym, and she's about 44 years old, puts in about zero effort every day. And I sit and I was like, why are you here? What are you trying to do? I just want to get into better shape. Do you think you're trying to get. And I'm very real with people, right? I'm not doing it to be a. I'm not trying to shame her. I'm like, I need to know why you're here so I can get you to where you want to be. And she's like, well, she's divorced. She has two kids. She wants to meet somebody new. I go, I'm not saying this to be an asshole. And anybody out there who wants it, I go, would you. You be honest? Would you? Okay, so then what do we. What do you think we need to work on? We need to work on your effort. We need to get you in here more. I don't. I even said to her, I won't charge you a dollar if you're in here for days a week, five days a week, I will not charge you a dollar. The day you miss over a bullshit excuse is the day I charge your card $2,000 per month. So I go, you either show up for yourself or don't come at all. It's that simple. And I want. I. Because I want to see her do well. Because having another sad woman in New York City, New York City doesn't Need it. The reason why I created strong New York was because I go, if I can make my neighborhood better, the people around me better, then my day infinitely becomes better. If I could convince a cab driver I've had this, you could ask anybody I've ever ridden a cab or an Uber with. I always talk to the cab drivers and they're like, oh, what do you do? I'm like, I own a gym. Oh, what should I do in the gym? I said, go. Every day, just be consistent, Just do something in this six minute ride we have down to fucking 7th Avenue, just be. And I always like teaching people these little things because everybody, as soon as they find out you're a trainer, you're a doctor, or whatever, they want to know what you could do to improve their lives. And I go, if I can make. If my cab driver beefed up, good looking, in shape guy, he's going to operate better in my neighborhood.

And chances are he won't be a cab driver much longer.

Yeah, right. My door guy, right? My door guy in my building. So I was like, yo, man, what can I do? I get so much shit delivered to my building. Protein shakes and bars and fucking equipment and all this. I'm always like, boys, it's all yours, take it. And they're always like, yo, I've been using that shit that you gave me. Oh, I love that. Oh, the energy drink. I want to see them do better. I don't need all this shit. I don't need a fucking another workout tool. I have a two gyms full of shit. I have $400,000 worth of equipment I don't need anymore, right? I like playing with it, I like having equipment. But after a while it's like, I got to get rid of old shit to, you know, get new stuff. And I want to see if I could get New York stronger. If I could get people working out more and living a better life, then that improves my day. So when I go get coffee or I get in a car, getting a Uber or whatever, everybody around me is in a better mood. I know if I could get more people working out and feeling better. So back to my client. If I could get her to exercise and feel better, then she's going to go meet somebody else. But if I continue to tell her, you're doing a great job, she's clearly fucking not. Why am I feeding into the system of bullshit, right? It's like, everything's going to be okay. Not if you don't change it. You're gonna go down that Same path. My job is to give you the harsh reality, or at least I believe it is. And if you don't like it, then go to Soul Cycle or somewhere where they're patting everybody on the ass and you're blowing out candles and. And you're doing that. And if that's what you want, then that's what you go get. But everyone's not for everyone, you know? Yeah. If you try. If you try to appeal to everyone, and I've learned this time and time again, if you try to be for everyone, then you're for no one. And if you. If you're friends with everyone, then no one could trust you.

Yeah, right.

If we're boys and he fucks us over or he fucks you over, how good of friends could I possibly be with him when it's like, you screwed my boy?

Yeah.

Like, I. It's hard for me to get tight with you now, you know? So there, as much as people don't agree with that, it's like, eventually you need to draw a line in the sand and you need to be like, hey, listen, I could be cordial to you, but I don't fuck with you. Like, I with him. Yeah. You know, just the way it is. Could he be forgiven over time? Sure. But, like.

You know, it all comes down to integrity. Yeah. You know, and that's. Integrity is a word most people know, but they don't really embody.

Yeah. I just saw this meme today. It was like, people who want change and people who are willing to change.

Yeah.

Are two very different lines.

Yeah.

The short. That the people who are willing to change. The line's a lot shorter. Everybody wants it, but are you willing to work for it? Yeah.

You know, and you said something earlier about, you know, turning 40 right now for some people, they think they'll be dead by 80. So 40 is a halfway point.

Yeah.

Some people think if they made it 40, okay, all's good. And now they're already expecting a decline. They're already. They consider them to be over the hill and the forties, a halfway point, and they've peaked, and now it's downhill from there. And you have a choice. Do you want to peak at 40? Do you want to peak at 50 or 60? How long do you think you're actually going to live? And one of the things I say to my clients, because some. My dad died at 75. So, you know, if I make it to 75, like, I'm good. Yeah, but your dad ate, like, shit. He smoked. He grew up In a different generation, know how to care himself. I said, you can live to 120 and beyond. So if you're 45 now and you, you currently think you got 30 years left. So your whole perspective, how you invest your money, how you spend time with your family, how you treat yourself is all based on a 30 year timeline. But let's just say you made a choice today. Start eating better, start training, shift your perspective to, I'm living to 120. I believe that. I know it. And I'm going to do everything in alignment with living to 120. How would it impact your finances, how the impact how you spend your time with your children? Would you be more present with your kids? Would you take more time off so you can be with them because you've got a longer Runway? How would that impact your nervous system? Because you realize, shit, I got way longer to go than I actually thought. And the truth is, you have a choice. Do you want to live to 100 or 120? Because if you do, you need to start making choices that are in alignment with that version of you. That's living to 120. Because who you are in the future depends on the choices you make today. And you made a choice at 40. I'm gonna be investing, shape my life. I chose to do my triathlons because even though I just turned 50, it's like, can I be in the best shape of my life at 50? I say, yeah, and I did it. And you and I, obviously, this is why we're friends. And some people, they may not get that, but you may be watching and you may be thinking, I'm 45 and this is as good as it gets. You have a choice. Do you want to believe that shit or do you want to actually make a change? Because if you want to change, get your ass off the couch, hire a coach, join a gym, find some people to hold you accountable, and just fucking go for it. But a lot of people, again.

Do.

They want change or are they ready to change?

Yeah. I said, on my fourth, 40th birthday, I was like, don't. I don't want a cake. Whatever. Everybody showed up, they had a cake for me and stuff. And I was like, listen, I really do appreciate that. To know that you're loved is a very. It's a good example of, like, what you're doing in life. Like, the people who show up for you when you need them. I've been very lucky to have a community that I do and have people around me that give A shit. And. And they were like, well, say something. And everybody's always looking for me to say something profound. And I'm like, I'm not. I wish I was better on the fly than that. But I said, I go, I'm ready to play the back nine better than I played the first. And everybody's like, what the fuck are you talking about? I was like, in the game of golf, right, you get the back nine is. Tends to be a little bit harder. And it is. And, you know, I'm not a big golfer guy, but I said, this is when I have to play a tighter game than I did the first nine. Yeah. In your teens, your 20s, your 30s, you could get away with a lot more eating, like, going out, partying. But you need to really tighten up your game, you know, from 40 on. Absolutely. If I want to live a better life, if I want to live to, let's say, 80 or 90, well, then those last couple of years. Couple years, I need to start playing a tighter game. I need to dial in my nutrition. I need to dial up my exercise. I need to dial in the way I treat people because I want that to be better. Because it's harder then. Right now, I'm more conscious of things I can't get away with as much. You need to be your finance. Everything needs it. By 40 years old, you should be like, okay, I up enough. I took my chances. Not to say that you can't do stuff later on in life, but at. At that point, you should be like, all right, I know who I am. Right. By 40, 45, 50 years old, I'm not even there yet. But, like, I'm guessing that, like, I have a better understanding of life and a better understanding of how people operate. I know what things feel like. I know good, bad, or indifferent. Not everything. I don't have all that work wisdom. But, you know, in your 20s and 30s, you think you know everything, but you get to a point where you're like, okay, I understand life a little bit better. I need. I got away with a lot here. I can't get away with as much now going forward. So tighten everything up, you know, and I. I encourage people to do it. It's not that you can't play the back nine. You just got to play a better game.

Yeah. Yeah. And it's a choice. Yeah, it's a choice. Do the hard things every day.

Yeah.

Build consistent routine. Challenge yourself. Find people who will hold you accountable. And just, you know, even. Just a 1% improvement every day will.

Make it doesn't, it doesn't have to be a lot like that was the whole point of that workout today. I don't have enough time. Great do. How'd you feel after doing a minute worth of push ups? You're like, fuck, my arms are sore now. Do that three times throughout the day. You spend three minutes of a 24 hour day doing a workout, you're probably next day you're going to be like, well, I did, you know, 120 push ups, 150 push up. Whatever it may be, whatever you start to accumulate over time, that's good, that's a good day. It's more than you would have done if you didn't do it.

Doing something better than nothing. And for those people who are like all or nothing type people, like, yeah, they go to the gym five days a week. They don't go at all. Look, the person who trains trains five days a week sporadically throughout the year. And the person who trains 20 minutes a day, five days a week, consistently throughout the year is going to have way better results.

Well, we were just talking about him and his sister playing guitar and he's like, I go, let's just. And I, I brought it up. I was like, well, think about it this way. If you play guitar once a week for a half hour day, right, you're not going to be as good or improve as fast as if you played every day for a half hour. So when I tell people, I go, don't go to the gym and fucking kill yourself on Monday and then not go back till next Monday, Yeah, I go, what if you did 20 minutes Monday, 20 minutes Tuesday. Now, over the course of the week, Instead of doing one hour, you did six hours or seven hours, right? Now add that up over 12 months, it's a lot more time and effort that you put in. So don't look to be like, all right, I'm gonna go and play for six hours today and I'm not gonna touch the thing again in 10, you know, a week from now, two weeks from now. No, do a little bit every day. Do get 1% better every day or half a percent better, you know. And what does that look like? Well, I ate a little bit. Bit better. People come to me all the time. They're like, I'm ready to go, I want to work out six days a week, I want to eat really well. And I go, hold on, you're 45 years old. This is the first gym you've ever been to, right? You clearly have no good eating habits. Why don't we start real simple? All right? What do you think I should do? Come in tomorrow. Let's do 20 minutes. I'm going to charge you for the hour, though. Why? Because you're not ready for an hour and you're gonna waste an hour of my time because I'm gonna have to walk you through a bunch of shit. So we're gonna do 20 minutes, right? And then you're gonna come back three days from now, we're gonna do another 20 minutes. And over time, you're gonna start to crave it and want it. And now I'm gonna get like a drug addict. You're gonna get addicted to it. And I want you like that because it's only gonna improve your life.

And for those that go all in for three weeks, or they go all.

In, they burn out.

Yeah. The three weeks later, they can't do it. It's not sustainable. And then they bounce back. And then what do they. They, you know, they, they say it's not for me.

Yes.

This gym thing isn't for me or that diet thing.

Yeah. And, and, but that's how I get people. And like, that comes with wisdom, experience. For me, doing this 20 years, you know, that's what I've learned over time. Everybody's like, okay, you want to buy my online program? Here's my six day week program. No. Start people with as little as possible. Get them liking it, get them feeling good, and don't make them do it all the time, because clearly they can't hold to a routine. You know, when everybody's like, I need a diet plan. Tell me what to eat. I had a guy the other day come into the gym, tell me what to eat. Okay. How much are you drinking? Well, I can't stop drinking. All right, well, let's start there. How many days a week are you drinking? Right. How many drinks are you having? Now if I could slow that down a little bit now, we could start to talk about diet. Right. Because most of the time, the drinking is a bigger detriment to your body than the food. Yeah. You know, I could get you to start eating a little bit better here and there. But if you're sucking down 12 drinks a night, you know, chasing ass all over New York City. Yeah. It's not. Yeah, right. You don't realize how much is in a mixed drink. You know, if your daily intake is 2,2500 calories and you're drinking 1600 of it in drinks, you know.

Yeah.

You're probably not going to look the way you want.

And you ain't getting up to the gym in the morning.

No, no, no. You're going to feel like absolute dog at 3:00am yes. So it's like, again, wisdom. It's like I got to triage certain problems first. Right. Everybody's like, I want to hit weights, but my shoulders, my back, and my knees hurt. All right, well, let's. Let's figure out what's going on there first before we start to have you start bench pressing squats, £200. Right. So, yeah.

So, Kenny, you touched on a bunch of projects and things you got going on, so I would love for you to share just a little bit about Strength Club.

Yeah.

The strong Festival. And just let the viewers or listeners know a little bit about what you offer. If somebody's interested in working with you, learning more about what it is that you do.

Yeah. So the Strength Club is my gym in New York. It was just where I wanted to be on a daily basis. I wanted to build a gym that, you know, didn't destroy me. Like, I built it during COVID when we weren't sure what was going on. So I have a 2500 square foot space in Manhattan. I'm hopefully in the next week or two going to open up Strength club number two in Caldwell, New Jersey. And again, we do private training, semi private training and group classes. We focus on building strength, teaching people how to get stronger. And this is all the rage today. You have everybody, every talking head on social media, talking about, you know, Peter Attia, Andrew Huberman, you know, you name it. They're all talking about. About getting stronger. You know, I started this strong thing back in 2015, 2016. I go, the goal should be to get stronger. And it's not just a physical strength. It's a mental, it's emotional strength. How do I get people stronger? So the Strength Club was my opportunity to be like, hey, this isn't a club that you have to fill out. You know, in the last couple years, private clubs in New York, like, you got to fill out this application and pay four fucking thousand dollars to be a part of it. I was like, I want to create a club where anybody. Effort is what gets you in and effort keeps you there. Not money or who you are, what job you hold. I want. I don't care if you're a fucking garbage man or, you know, a CEO of a company. It doesn't matter. Come and you're part of the crew, but effort is what you put in. So that was the idea behind the scene. Strength Club. And then Strong New York is the event that I created back in 2015, I wanted to create an event in New York City that I was going to a lot of health and wellness expos and events all over the world. You know, I just got back from Dubai. I was, I've been to Toronto and LA and Miami and Vegas and everywhere for different fitness events. I was like, New York doesn't have one. And the things I was going to in New York were, you know, Comic Con and the food and wine festival and the boat show and the car show. And I was like, why isn't there a fitness event in New York? So I wanted to create something fun and festive where it's, you're eating healthy food, you're working out with celebrity trainers, you were listening to good music. Like I wanted to create this health and wellness. So we just did our eighth one on October 5th and we had almost 3, 000 people there. Yeah. And I built it from 50 people in the basement of my old gym and I self funded the whole thing and I'm very proud of that. And as much as it, it's hard and it sucks and it's a struggle, you know, with me and one other person, you know, my right hand woman, she does everything logistically because I'm a moron when it comes to that. And she's the backbone of the business. And I'm just like the idea guy. You know, we built it to this huge event. So next year we're hoping to go bigger. And you know, that's an opportunity for people to experience this idea. And I wanted to because I think during COVID it accelerate the learning process for people. I used to do a lot of continued education in my gyms and I still do. But people don't value education because they're like, well, I can learn all the same shit on social media or I could go to that guy's website and learn all the same stuff. So what I wanted to do was enhance the experience. Right. I'm a hallway guy. So what a hallway guy is is basically you go to a lot of these events, you know, you like something like geo's event and me, you and two other guys are out in the hallway and we're bullshitting. It's more about the connection. I wanted to create more connection because I've learned time and time again that it's not what you know, it's who you know. So how do I get more great people to connect? A client of mine two days ago called me and he was like, I came to your event and I met the guys from Kinetic and now I'm working with them. So I can't thank you enough. That event was amazing. And on top of that, I got a job out of it. I go, if. If everyone leaves with a similar experience, then that is a successful event to me. That's what I want to happen. I want to help as many people as possible. And as cliche and bullshit as it sounds, if I can make everybody around me happy, well, why would I be miserable, right? I'd be in a better mood. So I want to make people happy. So strong New York Strength Club, that those are, you know, when people are like, do you want to have kids? I'm like, I got three. Yeah.

Well, I think one day you're gonna make an amazing father.

I hope so. You know, I hope so. And I never want to be a shitty one. That's for sure.

Yeah. I just want to say first off, congrats on.

Thank you.

The Strength Club and strong. And if you need a breath work facilitator for strong next year, I'm your guy.

Let's do it. Yeah, I'd love to have it. For sure. I'd love to do it.

You know, thank you so much for sharing your story. Thank you for showing up to be here in Toronto. Looking forward to having you. You share your wisdom and your story with the guys who are coming to Mind Body Soul tomorrow. For all you listening, you heard it here first. We are doing Mind Body Soul and money Sex power in New York City in 2025. We're gonna make it happen.

Have you done one in New York and the United States yet?

No, I've done events in Miami, in Los Angeles.

Okay.

But New York's the next thing. 100.

All right, take on the beast.

That's it.

Yeah. Beast of the East.

Yeah. Get Gerard Adams on board.

Cool.

Put. Put a team together. We'll crush it.

Awesome. Cool. See you guys all there.

Yeah. Thank you for being here. Thank you for, you know, being a part of the event, supporting this.

No, I'm happy to. I mean, I'm. I'm like the group of guys we had today were great. So, yeah, I'm hoping everybody tomorrow a.

Lot more of those dudes. And, and that's what it's about. It's about getting like minded brothers together. You know, showing them what we know and just inspiring them. Because like you said, if we can make everybody around us happy, then why wouldn't we, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, man.

Well, thank you thank you.

Thank you for being here.

Appreciate it.

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