BRITAIN'S TOP PSYCHIC UNCOVERS THE TRUTH: Nicky Alan's Rise, Fall, and SHOCKING Comeback!

You know you need something, you're just not sure what. You've been listening, you're doing the work, but there's still this feeling that you're circling the same place, like you're waiting for the thing that finally moves you. Now maybe you've thought about working with me one-on-one. Maybe something's held you back, the timing, the money, or you're just not sure you're ready yet.

I get that.

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Hi there, welcome to Grief to Growth Podcast. Your host is Brian D Smith, spiritual seeker, bestselling author, grief survivor, and life coach. Brian believes that the worst tragedies of life provide the greatest opportunity for growth. Brian says he was planted, not buried, and he is here to help you grow where you've been planted by the difficulties in life. In each episode, Brian and his guests will share what has helped them to survive and thrive. It is his sincere hope this episode helps you today.

Everybody, this is Brian back with another episode of Grief to Growth. And today I've got with me a returning guest. Her name is Nikki Allen. And Nikki is a born psychic medium.

She comes from many generations of gifted psychics weeks before her.

She officially started her psychic work 31 years ago. Now, for 18 years, she was a police officer, ending as, ending as a major investigation bereavement-trained detective in the Essex Police. Following a medical retirement in 2003, and by public demand, she has achieved a very high profile in the spiritual industry as a full-time psychic medium. She's also a spiritual teacher, a writer, and an angel expert. Since 2003, she's been a freelance paranormal writer, regularly published in mainstream spiritual magazines. She's the current columnist in Take a Break's Fate and Fortune magazine as a psychic detective. She's also a resident features writer in Haunted magazine. Her spiritual memoir, her debut spiritual memoir, I should say, Me, Myself and I: Diary of a Psychic, was a number one Amazon hit as the hottest new release in the genre. It's a book that I've read, I interviewed her about before. It's a fantastic book. Her second book, which we're here to talk about today, is The Rise and Fall of Britain's Best Psychic Medium. And it's just been released and it's already achieving high international acclaim. So with that, I want to welcome to Grief to Growth, Nicky Allen.

Thank you, my lovely. It's an absolute pleasure to be back. I do know what I do recall. I know it's been a long time. But I do recall saying to you before how handsome you are and listening to your voice. So if we could just— if you could just like read me a story. And I'll just sit here and relax and listen to your velvety chocolate voice.

We'll do that some other time. But I appreciate that. Thank you very much. I really enjoyed having you on the last time. I encourage people, if you're— as you're listening to this one, go ahead and listen to this one, but go back and listen to the first interview with Nikki. She's a bundle of energy. It's, it's really amazing, because that's in spite of your physical difficulties.

Absolutely. I've learned through my grief, through me having to change my whole life to adapt to this condition, that the number one word is adaption. I literally had to decide whether to live— as, as you all know, in Emmy, Myself I, um, you know, you have to learn to live with this either negatively and as a victim, or positively, and what can I do from this, what can I make from this. And so obviously the first book, I had no idea that would ever get published, um, and it was just me writing out— I've always done it since I was a teenager, I've always written out my thoughts and feelings. And so when I could write, I wrote them out, and that book obviously culminated from that. And people saying, wow, you should get this published. And I'm like, nobody's going to be interested. And then naturally, I'm thinking last year, okay, I'm not great. I've still got this condition. You know, I'm still trying to manage it. God knows why I haven't been healed. Everybody always asks, why haven't the angels healed you? I obviously chose this path to help enlighten people that are in grief, because you do, you know, it's not about loss, this type of grief. What it is, what I mean is, it's not about loss of a loved one. It's about the loss of a whole life. Loss of everything material that you ever, you know, valued, and to be homeless and to have nothing apart from my two little rescue dogs and myself. It's, it's something that you learn to appreciate the most little things in life. So last year, I thought, right, you're going a bit spirally, you're going downhill here a bit. What do you need to do? And I thought, I know what I need to do. I need to do the prequel. I didn't, I didn't even plan the first one. But the prequel, which is this one, The Rise and form of Britain's Best Psychic Medium. I didn't do that title either. My amazing editor, he is Denver Murphy. He's amazing. And I was gonna call it Working for Dead People, just to put a bit of a, a laughter or a slant on it, you know, to make it more open. He said, nope, you need to put this down. It makes it more dramatic. And it is very true. And I'm like, thank you very much. So this book takes us From when I was a detective on major investigations, and my first major loss and first major breakdown, which was being medically retired from the police service. And it's all I'd ever known since I was 16 years old. And you had a family, you had a whole lifestyle around policing, you know, you obviously, you worked hard and play hard with your colleagues. And to lose that was horrific. I was on my own. And So what happens is, is that I know I keep jumping, sorry, but I last year I thought, you know what, I'm going to fill in the gaps. That's what I'm going to do when I'm well enough. I'm going to write and fill in the gaps of what happened before, you know, Me, Myself and I. And so my house got haunted.

Wow.

I actually, I remember the day I would just found out, I wasn't even told I'd been retired. I found out by our regulation letters. And someone texted me and said, wow, I'm sorry, you're retired. I'm like, am I? So they literally dropped me and just moved on. Which was really upsetting. And then things started happening. And I thought to begin with, it was just my family saying, don't worry, it's okay. I had really heavy Gothic chandeliers swinging, but they weren't like swinging as if a breeze had hit them, even that'd be impossible because they're very heavy. But they would swing and then stop mid-motion.

Oh, wow.

And go higher, then swing. And my partner at the time, who was a police officer, was like, Nikki, you need to look above your head. And at the time I was ironing, which is a miracle in itself. I don't do ironing clothes. I was actually doing ironing. And I looked up and I thought, wow, that's not great. And then I would walk past lights, they would dim, hum, or explode. And then the voices started, Nikki, Nikki, Nikki, every night while I was in bed. And it was so loud, even my partner could hear them.

Oh, wow.

And so I had people running up and down my bedroom, people walking, stamping, calling my name. And I thought, this isn't right. I don't normally have this. And I was getting quite worried and concerned as to why I had all these dead people in my room. And then the baby started, baby started crying. And that was, you know how awful that is to hear a newborn baby cry. And also very irritating, very irritating. And I'm like, wow, what, this isn't right. So I got up and every room I went to, the baby moved to the next room. I was kind of chasing this baby wailing. And, you know, I thought, well, you know, I'll be open-minded. I checked that there have been no arrivals in the neighborhood, you know, I could hear the child or anything like that. And the doorbell would ring. It was just my house was alive. And we weren't getting any sleep. It was getting really stressful because it literally was alive. The house was alive. And it wasn't until my friends, God bless her, phoned me and said, look, I'm going to see a medium, but my friend has like ducked out. Can you come with me? Because most of my friends don't come to me for readings. I know them so well. And so I went with her and this medium opened the door, didn't even look at her client, which was my friend, and she just went, the baby's not going to stop crying until you start working for the spirit world.

Oh, wow.

I'm like, wow, she just didn't say anything else. And, you know, this started a massive turn of events, a roller coaster ride into me working publicly in front of 100 people in the next couple of months. I was literally in front of 100 people, standing there absolutely terrified. Because my tutor, that medium, said, you're good enough to get up there now and just stand in front of people and do what we call platform mediumship, which is deliver messages from the spirit world in this spiritualist center. And initially, I was exceptionally— I do graphically describe how terrified I was on that first time. I do graphically describe it in the book because I was terrified. But eventually, there was a young lad who unfortunately went to see his best friend in a pub, in a bar, and he was basically saying goodbye. He then drove off a bridge on his motorbike. And luckily, he was a very good communicator. And so this lady, you know, there's all these people looking at these young, this young, like we call it in England, gobby, like mouthy, loud medium, and everybody's looking at me like, she's gonna be rubbish. She doesn't even look like a medium. She's got jeans on. Yeah. And Suddenly everybody sat up. It's like, oh my God, because I literally just knew the name of the husband, the name of the man that took himself over, the name of the pub that he went into before he killed himself, and when he drove off the bridge. And it just went from there. I was booked all over the country, and it just kicked off this huge thing. And literally the first day that I did a reading at my friend's salon, the baby stopped crying, and I didn't have any more spirit interaction in my house. So they were basically forcing me into it, from detective to medium, or psychic medium, whatever you want to title me. And so how I think this has progressed in respect of grief and bereavement is that nothing is going to replace the loss of a loved one. Nothing's, nothing's going to do that in respect of the pain and the hurt. It obviously gets better in time and more manageable, but you never lose that, oh my God, they're not here. And I feel that part of my vocation, part of my soul plan, is to fill in the gaps to try and bring comfort and proof to people that they will be with their loved ones again. And I feel that I nail it in this one because there are so many stories of the afterlife. Even people have volunteered putting their experiences in on how, you know, their spirit dad saved their life from cancer and how someone got a message from someone who was still alive in a coma. And people that have communicated with me with dementia. It covers every aspect of, I feel, proving the afterlife. I would defy— you're going to get the hardcore skeptics that they're not going to believe anything at all. But I defy anybody after reading this one, you know, if they still think there isn't an afterlife, because it is— they literally took me by the hand and said, this is how we're going to train you to be a psychic medium. This is how we're going to show you your upgrades. This is how we're going to show you How to Connect with Your Guides. And they basically took this young, I don't know, very toughened, you know, detective, and turned me into this soft, mushy, empath, sensitive person that just felt our whole reason for being was to bring comfort, love, and proof to the masses. And so, you know, this is where the book came from. I can't stop, you know, I can't, I can't stop doing it. And no matter how poorly I get, I have this insane drive to keep creating books because I can do that. I can't tour. I was due to come and tour America just before my road accident and Australia. And I think my life would have been very different. But for some reason, they want me here doing what I do now, which is my bit on TikTok, my bit on YouTube, and my online courses, my guided meditations, and also my books. And book 3 is already nearly done. I would have— I know the content of every book. It's like they tell me, right, this is what you're going to do next. And they almost fill my head with what I need to write. The problem is that my body doesn't work as quick as how much information they're giving me.

I understand.

Yeah.

You know, I just—

I want to just interrupt you for just a second because we just jumped right into this, which is great.

Sorry, I didn't even mean to.

Yeah, I know. You're— I love, I love your energy. But for the benefit of people that haven't heard the first interview and haven't read the first book. Let's talk about your, your background, your history. So you've— but you've always been psychic, right?

Stay with us, we'll be right back.

You know, one of the hardest things about grief, most of the people in your life just don't get it. They want you to be further along than you are. They get uncomfortable when you bring it up, so you stop bringing it up. And that's why I started writing. My Substack is where I go deeper, thoughts I don't always get to in the podcast. Essays on consciousness, on continuing bonds, on what it actually means to carry loss and still build a life. The stuff that used to keep me up at night, written out in a way that I hope meets you in the morning. But here's what I didn't expect when I started it: the community that showed up. People who are doing exactly what you're doing— listening, learning, trying to find their footing. Readers who comment, who share their own stories, who remind each other that none of us are as alone in this as we feel. And that's what the Substack has become, a place to go deeper with me and to find your people. It's free to subscribe. Find me at grief2growth.com/substack. That's grief, the numeral 2, growth.com/substack. Or just go to Substack and search for Grief to Growth.

I hope to see you there.

Yes, yes. I literally, from the age of about 3 or 4 years old, I would have a recurring dream that I had till I was about 10, of standing at the bottom of my stairs in my, you know, my home looking up to this big white— what's the word? It's like it kind of like hummed with energy, like a woo woo. And I used to look up. And I suppose in those days, I didn't really know what it was. But it was the— it was a doorway to heaven. And I would fly all over the place and talk to various people. And I thought everybody could do that. I think the real day that nailed it for me was when I was walking. My dad had died in a road accident. He was only 37. I was only 9 years old. And I had younger siblings. And it was horrific. It was horrific. Because he was such a shining light. And 2 days after he passed, I just, I went out with my auntie who had come over to stay. To take the dog out just to get out of it. I think she just wanted to get me out of all the pain and that, you know. And my dad pulled up in his car. I went, it's okay, Nick, I'm fine. And then he drove off. And I'm like, what the hell?

I—

what they're telling me, my dad's dead. I've just seen him. So I am raging. So I then start screaming and running back home. My auntie hasn't got a clue because she hasn't seen anything. And I run back home and I go, I just slammed through the door and say, how dare you say Daddy's dead. I've just seen him. So my— so the strongest— they're both psychic, both sides of my family, but the strongest mediums that go through many generations— I think I'm now fourth generation that I know of, of seventh son, seventh son. I've broken the mold by being a female. However, all my family, all my brothers, sisters, mediums, psychics, and healers. And my granddad pulled me aside and said, look, you're going to see things that other people can't. You're going to see spirit people from heaven. You're going to see angels, and you're very special girl. And you have to remember that and not to be scared of it. Never, ever show fear. The only thing you'll ever have to worry about is the living. And my granddad has always been with me when he passed later on, and my dad has as well. But I was so into— I had a very abusive adolescence. So a lot of my abilities bubbled away in the background. Because my mum married someone that was exceptionally violent and vulgar. And it bubbled away. But my intent was to join the police service. I'd always wanted to be one, a police officer, and I just literally stayed focused on that. And as soon as I got into the police cadets, I think that I just went, I've got it, because if I stay at this certain level of, you know, what they need from me, I will become a regular police officer. And I think the relaxation of knowing I'd achieved it, and plus I was allowed to live at the police center because of the violence that was taking place at my mum's house, um, the relaxation allowed the doors to open again. So I'm very ashamed to say that, um, we would— we were so naughty as police cadets. It sounds awful, doesn't it? But we're going back to the '80s now, and we used to have like bottles of wine and beer and all sorts of things. And I would do readings for people, which was so naughty because I was most probably a bit tipsy. And I was like, yeah, come on then. Yeah, yeah, sure, Nan here. Come on, let's bring your Nan in. And I used to do these like readings for everybody. And everybody used to kind of treat it as like a bit of an entertainment thing. And it wasn't until I started getting involved in regional crime squads, vice squads, and especially major investigations where I was dealing with murder victims, it then really kicked off. And so I ended up doing readings in the evening and working as detective during the day. The problem with that, and I do speak about it in my book, the problem with that is that I saw the murder victims. So there's one particular one I speak about, Ronnie, God bless his heart. I don't think I put his name in the book because I didn't get— I couldn't get hold of the wife quick enough. To get the permission because I was on a real quick turnaround to get it out for Christmas. And, um, he was basically executed. He was a doorman. He worked on, um, doorman, I think. Is it the same thing for you, doorman? Work on the front doors of clubs and things. And he was a scapegoat, basically, and he was executed, um, at his home on the doorway. It was a drive-by shooting.

Oh, wow.

Um, in front of his 3-year-old son and his wife. And he was big, beautiful, handsome bodybuilding man.

And when I—

the first time I walked into the house, he was standing next to the television. And I'm going in as the bereavement trained officer, you know, it's the first time seeing all the family. And he's standing there going, tell him I'm here, tell him I'm here. I'm like, oh my goodness, I can't do this. So he's the murder victim standing there. And I'm trying to separate detective from psychic. It was really, really difficult. But I got to know the family really well. And after about 6 months, I just— it was bursting out on me, Brian, I can't even tell you. I was like, oh my God, I've got to say something. And she'd— she was open to spiritual stuff. And she'd found out that I had psychic abilities because I use them all the time in the place. And I basically said to her, do you have your TV turned switch over a lot? And she went, yeah. I said, does it go to— do you know Johnny Bravo? Have you heard of Johnny Bravo? Yeah. And I said, does it switch to Johnny Bravo? She went, oh my God, how did you know that? And I said, well, you know what I can do. And I said, but you know why it goes to Johnny Bravo, don't you? And she went, yeah. And basically, a husband had been killed. His nickname was Johnny or Bravo because he looked like Johnny Bravo.

Oh, wow.

You know the cartoon? And So I said, he's been doing it since the day he passed. He's been here. I said, he's gone up, but been come right back down again. He's been here the whole time with you and your son. And it changed the way she coped with it, because all she could focus on was the shooting in front of her, which I don't know how the hell anybody get over that. And I'm still in contact with her now. And she's grown and she's remarried. And Jake, her son, is now, you know, 20s. And he's a father himself now. And it just shows that some people that are open to this, as I say, it doesn't replace the grief. It just gives you some sort of hope. It gives you a feeling of comfort. And then when the signs start, and you accept them, and you start this spiritual relationship with your lost loved one, I think that's just magical. It helps me so much. You know, my dad passing when I was 9 was a catalyst of severe abuse on me and my mum. And I used— and I found it so hard to get over that grief because it led to so much pain and injury. And God knows, I ended up being stabbed and all sorts by her husband. And so I found it hard to let go of that. But the more and more, even, you know, even now, he'll turn the television on, or he'll put something off of the side and put it on the floor. And it just helps me, you know, even though lots of people say to me, oh, you're so lucky having this gift. You're so lucky that you're aware about, you know, you can talk to your mum and dad. Yeah, but they're not physically here for me to have a hug. You know, I can't say to my dad, oh, can you come and like, you know, repair the fridge or whatever, right? And so there is a massive loss there. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I'm finding, you know, even with people that pass now, I cope easier because I know where they are. It's like they're on holiday. And eventually one day, I will fly out and see them. And that's, that's— I got that analogy from this beautiful man who, his wife was— it was a telephone reading, and his wife was on the phone. Oh, your husband's here, darling. And so it was so beautiful. So it was soulmates. And it was, and it turned out the reading was on their 50th wedding anniversary, which was even better. And he said, love, this is the way it works. He goes, don't keep wishing your time away that you want to come back up here because you've got all the grandchildren. He said, just imagine I'm in Australia, Australia. And I'm waiting at the airport. And when you fly in, I'll be right there. And I thought it's a lovely analogy. And he said, and every now and then I'll send you a postcard through one of them. And he meant me. And I'll also give you the signs where you know it's me just giving you a little kiss. And I just cried my eyes out. We both were. Lovely man. And if I can just bring, you know, and you know, you get these people that say all mediums prey on, prey on people that are vulnerable. It's absolute rubbish. People come to us, we don't push ourselves on anybody. However, I like the fact that there is something in books that you're not saying, oh, we can talk to dead people, it's up to you, read it or not. But if you read it, it will enter you into a magic you couldn't, you know, you couldn't imagine. And it's like my third book is What Happens When We Die. I've been writing this for years. And I've got loads of it. And I've just got to put it all together. Because I know what happens when we die, because I've been shown it. I asked where my uncle was, and they showed me his path of his soul. I've seen the soul leave at the time of passing. I've seen it in the chapel of rest. I've just seen an experience.

Let me— let's talk about your uncle. What did you see when you said you saw his path? What was that like?

Oh my goodness, it was mind-blowing. And what I will say now is that it's not imagination. And then I just tell you, they know that I need proof to share it, otherwise I won't. And so they backed it up. Up afterwards with signs and synchronicity. So my uncle in Spain had passed over. And it was a shocker, really, he'd had, he'd had a lot of, lot of problems. It was a bit of a relief because he'd had a stroke. And he, you know, he was really struggling. And the problem is, I was over here in the UK, they were over in Spain. And I was like, you know, I mean, where is he now then? Can you just show me? And it was that simple. It was just that question. And then I felt I needed to go into meditation. So went into meditation. And straightaway I saw him and one of his favorite t-shirts was a red Ferrari t-shirt. And he was wearing that. He looked magnificent. And he smiled and then suddenly, poof, that went and it took me back to him laying just past. And I saw these sparkly lights, which I've seen at funerals loads of times, all these sparkly lights of his soul ascending from his body. It then is the sparkling lights then went up to a layer, which was very pale creamy white. I've actually had got a photo of this, which I think I put on here on YouTube. And I'm like, what's that, Miss? And they said, that's the presence of Archangel Azrael. At the time, I'd never heard of Archangel Azrael. So I don't read up anything. I wait until they tell me, I then get proof. And then I say, right, this is what this, this is how this happens. You know, it's a bit like a detective still in that way. I have to have the proof. So I'm like, Azrael, so I thought, right, don't forget to Google that when you wake up. And then the essence of my uncle then was taken to wherever, I don't know what, where it was, it's just a different dimension, I suppose, you know, to help people up, if you like. Because that's what we all think, it's up there somewhere in the sky. And I then saw that his soul was wrapped wrapped in this like muslin cloth. And I saw it go over to— they created a figure for me. You've got to remember, all angels, all spirit people are just energy and light. So they have to create images for us to relate to as humans that we can then explain it to other humans. Because if we just say energy and light, nobody's gonna know what we're talking about. So there was this man in a long black cloak, and he had a square black hat, and he took took my uncle's soul, right? And he then walked to, which was incredible, these like spirit huts that they have in Thailand, right? And that they goes right back to the Aztecs and back to the Mayan times. And I'm like, wow, because I didn't know any of this. This is after I've Googled it all, right? And so I said, well, who's that man in the black, by the way? Who's that man in the black? They said he's Jeremiah. He takes a soul and does the life review. And then he will basically, after he's done the review, deal with healing for the transition from human to spirit form. And then he can go to the reality layer. And I'm saying, what's the reality layer? And this is Julianus, my guide, was saying, well, the reality layer is what you know as heaven. Right, okay. So then Jeremiel then takes this into one of the spirit hearts, my uncle's soul unravels like this muslin, and then this white glittery light formed into the image of my uncle laying there at peace. Then all these blue lights started coming, these blue orbs. And I'm like, what are they? And they said, these are all the family members he'll recognize once we've dealt with his review and his healing.

Hmm.

So I'm like, right, okay. So then he goes with Jeremiah for his life review. And I said, do people always see Jeremiah then? And they said, they see Jeremiah, but what form they will recognize the most. As being safe. So some people see Jesus, some people see Muhammad, some people see Buddha, you know, some people see alien beings because they've had an alien incarnation. Don't get me started on that. That's a whole ball of another thing. And I'm like, wow, okay. So then I see my Uncle Ron do his review. And it's just like life snaps of what you achieved because you have a life plan before you come down. So it's like you had this life plan, you wanted this experience, you did that. So it's like a bit, it's a bit like it is a review of what you've done. That wasn't quite right, was it? No. For some people, if, and because this is how it then traversed, they then took me away from my uncle because I must have asked him, so what about baddies that have done nasty things? And they took me to a chamber full of cherubim And they were, you know, the chubby cherubim, and they were all in gold gilt on the walls. And in the middle of this huge, beautiful room was a white milky pool. And this white milky pool, they said, this is, this is the chamber. This is the chamber of the cherubim. I'm like, okay. And they said, this is where you judge yourself. And I'm like, what's all that about? So I then see a dark shadow, which they basically show me is a bad person that's either killed or done something horrifically. Okay. So this, this soul walks down into the, into to the thing. So what happens is Jeremiah says, well, you did this, you murdered someone, you killed someone, whatever, you need to go to the Chamber of Cherubim. That's like a different department from me. So trying to make it all like a man thing so we can understand it, right? So I watched this soul walk into this white milky pool, right? And then the cherubim come alive and they start floating and then sit and all look into the water. Oh, it gives me shivers because I've— it's so clear to me. And all my students have seen it as well. So it's all totally real. And yeah, I've taken them up to a place called the Crystal Palace, and they go, I was in this gold room with, with cherubim. I'm like, oh my God, yeah, I know that one. So, you know, I haven't led them in there. They found it themselves and corroborated it with me over the years. Wow, which is incredible. So anyway, suddenly, the cherubim's heads turned to lion and oxen. Like ox heads and lion heads. I'm like, this bit's scary. And then I could see these like fluorescent tadpoles swimming in the water around this dark soul. And I'm like, what are they? And they said they're sentients. And I went, okay. And they said they gauge the energy of the soul. And the soul is reflected in a mirror whilst they're in this pool. So they're met with their karmic actions. So they bathe in what they've created, the pain, the hurt, the misery, whatever they've done, they bathe in it. Right.

Okay.

And so all the water started to boil and bubble. Right. And literally, the amount of pain and agony and misery this soul was in was palpable. And the faces were so scary on the cherubim. And then suddenly, I saw the black just dissipate. And then there was nothing. And so I said, what's that? And they said, they're the souls that cannot be redeemed and will never be allowed to reincarnate again. So we're talking like people like Hitler, people that are just so gone, so beyond humanity in their own energy, they dissipate in this pole. And then the cherubim's faces go back to these beautiful babes, and then they just float back into the walls. I'm like, what just happened? And again, I'll tell you in a minute what the Google thing was when I did that. It blew my mind. So then I'm back with my uncle, and back in this spirit hut. And he's basically whole, and he's in his favorite red t-shirt and a pair of white shorts, right? And he's laying there and looking like a human. And then all of the blue orbs manifest into these people. Now there's lots of people I didn't know, okay, that like older generation. So they then were like, come on then, let's go. And then he just sat up and they took his hand. And then the next thing, we're walking down this street and they take him down this close. And they said, we know you always wanted to have this sort of house and he created his own house right in front of me. And he had stuff from my auntie that was in there ready for her to come when she did. She's still alive, bless and he was so spoiled by all these ladies. And I kept saying, what's your name? What's your name? Because I didn't recognize them because they're like his nan and great grandma, you know, and his great grandpa and his uncle. And I'm like, I can't remember all this. I've got to remember this. He goes, I'm all right. I'm all right. Just ask Pat. So then I'm on the phone to Spanx. I'm due to go out there to do the funeral and do the eulogy and everything. And I phoned and went, oh my God, you won't believe what I've just seen. She goes, don't. She goes, I've just had a nap. And I've just dreamt of your Uncle Ron, and he's in a red, red t-shirt and white shorts. That's how I've just seen him. She goes, was it the Ferrari t-shirt? I went, yeah. She went, oh my God, he's just shown me that. And he's shown me with all my— with our old aunties and uncles. I went, right, who's Mary? Who's this? And all of the names were all of his aunties, his grandma, his great-grandma, and she knew them all, the names. I'm like, that's incredible. And then I said, he's waiting for you up there, but you've got ages yet, I'm afraid. Oh, I want to go up there. I said, no, you've got ages. But it literally showed me the line of the journey. So I'm getting on Google as well. I've just spoken to my auntie, I'm on Google. And so the first thing I put in is obviously Azrael. And it turns out Archangel Azrael is this milky white energy that presides over people that are dying. And he helps bring people, spirit people in to comfort the person whilst they're dying. But they also, he also brings brings healing to the people that are there. So people, you know, shock obviously keeps you going during that denial period in the beginning of grief. But also, he is supposed to bring this almost automic kind of energy in that just makes you go, I need to just focus on doing what I can do, staying alive and getting through this passing. So he does that, Archangel Azrael. Basically, some people refer to him as the Angel of death. But that's who he is. But his energy is magnificent. And as I say, I have got a photo, I'm sure I put it on YouTube and on Facebook and my TikTok channel, showing a picture of Azrael's presence just before my mum passed. And it's pretty incredible. I'll send it to you. Then I googled Jeremiel, because I never heard of him either. And he's the archangel of life reviews, and takes the souls once they reach heaven, and takes them to the area for them to have transitional healing. And I'm like, this is mind-blowing. And then when I'm thinking of the healing, I then think, oh my goodness, I forgot, I forgot what— during my visions, I saw these ladies in long Grecian robes, long dark hair, trickling water over soldiers, over animals and weak souls, hurt souls. And when I read on, when I've Googled Jeremiah, it says, and if there is massive healing needed for that soul, whether it be animal or, you know, a human, they're taken to the celestial garden where they are healed with the— it's like the Fountain of Youth or the Fountain of Life, the water that the seraphim pour over them. I'm like, in the celestial gardens, I'm like, wow. And then this is the mind blower. When I Google cherubim chamber, I just, I think I just put in cherubim chamber judgment. And it came back. And it's in the Old Testament. And it's something like, and thy, thy, thine cherubim are the right hand of God. I'm also going to get stuff for this by Christians, but I can't help what I saw. And it basically in the Bible, in the Old Testament, it says about the cherubim shall stay in the chamber as the right hand of God, and shall judge their souls. With lion and oxen head.

Oh, wow.

Wow.

And that I was like, oh my God, it's like biblical type stuff. And I, you know, I've read the Bible because I love to give the Christians a challenge when they want to like send hate on me.

I hate to interrupt you because we've got— I have so many questions. And we only have a certain amount of time.

Please do. I do overtalk. I'm so sorry.

No, no, not at all. Not at all. That's fascinating. And it brings me to a question someone asked me the other day about what— will we have bodies in heaven? And I think this is why people get confused, because I heard you say that the spirit people are energy and balls of light. But then I also heard you talk about bodies and homes and recognizing each other physically. So how would you— how do you reconcile that?

This is the biggest question I get asked, you know, can I wear my right clothes? Will like, what do I look like? Basically, this is the best way I can describe it as to what it's like to be a spirit person. Imagine a really lucid dream you've had, where you can feel, touch, you know exactly where you are, you're talking to people, but you're not really, are you? Because you're laying asleep. Okay? That's what it's like. If you then times that by 1000-fold, that's what it's like to be a spirit being. They haven't got a physical body, but they can manifest and manipulate an image for us to recognize. Is when we go up to the spirit world, we are like this ball of energy or light. And people hate that because they think, oh my God, no, I lose my humanity. Well, you use your human body, but not humanity. And it's a bit like a download. So you look at, you look at the energy, and straightaway, you'll know exactly who it is. At the moment, I physically look at you, albeit virtually, but I am looking at you. And I know that from physical to physical, I recognize who you are, and I'm talking to you. The difference is, is, is that it's a soul recognizance. So like, for instance, if you've got a lot, a lot of family, you're sitting in the lounge, and then you hear the front door go, and you think, I know, that's my son, I just know it, because you sense and know their energy without even seeing it, right? It's exactly the same there. You can, from what I've seen from 30-odd, you know, what I've been bang on connecting with spirit people every day for the last 32 years, they show me, literally, I stood there while my uncle created a house that he wanted. And, and then I've had a spirit person when I'm on stage at a show, who created a yacht in front of me. I went, oh, he's got a lovely yacht there. And it's got Ruby written on it. And she said, well, my daughter's Ruby, and he literally lived on his yacht. I think he loved that yacht more than me. So he created that reality. I don't know why I randomly just picked that story. But he randomly created that that, one, to prove what he used to love down here, and two, he'd recreated it up there. And so people say to me, yeah, but it's not a real boat, is it? Or for instance, someone that smoked, I say they're smoking fags now, they're smoking cigarettes again, because then they know that they can't die. How can they physically do that? Do they go to a shop? Do they buy the cigarettes? Where's the lighter from? We're like, no, you've got to think.

I have to interrupt you for a second because this is, this is a, this is a really big point for people. And so they get caught up, and I love the way you're describing it. But what I say to people is, this reality that we think is physical is not physical.

Yes.

So we think that any, any reality that we're in is physical. So I think from the perspective of spirit people, it is physical, it's just more thought responsive. So we say it's not real, because we can't create a house only in our dreams. This was— this reality that we're in is so dense and so slow to react to thought that we perceive it as physical. And we think of anything else as less than. And what I tell people, it's actually more. It's just like you said, when I'm in a lucid dream, and I've been in lucid dreams, where I've felt the walls, and I felt the sun on my face, and I've known that I was creating that. And that's what I think it's like in the spirit world.

Absolutely 100%. I didn't want to get too deep into realities because my reality is the spirit world and being there. I am more connected to the angel realms and spirit world than I am to humans down here. This is like The Matrix, you know, we're playing this little puppet game, right? Where we're pure souls, we're, we're eternal souls. And this is where people have got to think, right? Another big question I get is because I got— it went viral, it went, it went over a million, a video I did about you you choose your life before you come down.

Right?

So I get, you know, the haters, I got the how dare you say that I was abused, I didn't ask for that. And I totally agree. Nobody asked for that. However, people don't see beyond their human, one human life existence, which is a speck of salt in an ocean of continuity and eternity. So when they get back up, they'll realize this tiny little irrelevant life they had is just part of their soul ascension. And that they can come back down in 3 generations' time and do the same again, have another human existence holiday, if you like. But the people that are scared of death or scared of the fact that they're going to lose this human life and think this is it, are the ones that kind of revolt against what we're trying to say. Most, like 99% of most mediums and most spiritual philosophers have got the same agreement that we do reincarnate, we do come down for human experiences. And the older our soul, the harder the lessons get. And literally, this is a synchronicity. Just before I spoke with you, this lady said, look, I've been ill, I lost my husband, my son's disabled. I never asked for this. What the hell? I hate my life. And I'm saying, please, you've got to think on the bigger picture. Because when you get back to the spirit world and you do your review with Jeremiel, he'll be saying to you, oh, you did that, you lost your son, you know, or so you lost your husband, your son's disabled. This is what you asked for. Because the older your soul gets, the more human experiences, the more raw human experiences you want to— we can't think of it here. We think it's mental. But when we're up there and we've been here loads and loads of times over hundreds and hundreds of years, we think, well, let's have a more juicier experience, shall we? Because it's a bit boring. Because what you've got to remember is— this is the way I try and bring it into human heads— is it's euphoric up there. You can create whatever you want up there. If you want to sit in a palace, you can. If you want to sit in a tent or lay under the stars, can, you can create whatever you want, just like you do in dream state. Okay, you can do that. After like 3 generations of your, you know, your family coming, you'd like a bit bored. It's a bit perfect up here. I've gone to different dimensions, I've done this, I fancy being back in a human body. And, you know, I haven't got long enough to even try and evidence this. But this is— there's so much of this.

I completely agree with you. And I was I was just listening. I listen to books more than read. So I was reading Tom Campbell's book this morning, My Big Toe: The Theory of Everything. And he talks about these other more thought-responsive realms. Yes, they're pleasant, but you can't grow there. Because if something unpleasant happens, you can just, you can take yourself out. Yes. The second something, you don't want to be somewhere, you're not there. If you do something you regret, you can actually undo do it.

And absolutely right.

And, and that sounds wonderful. But you can't learn there.

Exactly. It's like I always say, when people say, I haven't got enough money, I haven't got this, I haven't got that. I had a very comfortable life, lost everything, got homeless. So the material part is just negative. There's just no, no relevance to that. And I think people hold on to that down here. And they think, oh no, but I've got my stuff, I have to have this, you know, you come into here with nothing, you go out with nothing. And So over there, there's no material needs, there's nothing. It's like winning the lottery. You know, these people say, oh yeah, I'd love to have like the lottery, live like lottery winner. You are up there. So once you've got it all, you don't grow, do you? Because you don't, you're not fighting for anything. And this is what I try and say to people. When I save up and I get something, I think, yes, I've done through my own hard work.

Thrill.

Exactly. But if you've won the lottery, it's like, I'll just have that one and I'll have it in 6 colors. Thank you. And then what else have I got in my life? And so I know because I went up again. I've been— I, they must be on— I said this to you last time, I think they must be on Valium up there, because I'm up there going, what, how, prove it when I come back down, right? So I went up there and I said, well, what about all the people that have the best lives ever? Now, I don't know, over here they had this armed robber that won the lottery and he could still have the money and he was a nasty, evil person. I know lots of nasty, evil people that have got their life so easy and you think, well, hang on a it. I'm a really good person. Why is this all happening to me? Another major question I get asked, right? I've never done anything wrong. Same as me. I've never intentionally hurt anybody. I've tried to do the greatest good. And I'm sitting here mostly in bed. And, you know, basically disabled. And I do get days like that. I'm always reminded of this meditation that says, they're the young souls, Nicola. They always call me Nicola up there, hey? Only my doctor calls me Nicola. And so Juliana said, they're the young souls, Nicola, they have to begin somewhere. And so the theory is, well, it's not a theory, I know it for a fact, but for people out there, is that the young, lucky, the young souls that come down here want easier, easier lives. And so they come down and they experience the lottery, they experience being famous for a while. And I think some of them actually say, if I could have that fame, I'll go back early. Look at all of the time that the biggest stars go back early and they have problems with drugs and alcohol and depression and all that kind of stuff because they're not like us. What we've been through, Brian D Smith, would break most people, would break a young soul.

Well, let's talk about you. I mean, I could do this all day, literally, but we can talk about it.

Bless your heart. Well, come back anytime you want.

Yeah, we have, we have touched on it, but people don't know what you've been through. And you— we had to cancel this interview, had to postpone this interview because you have health problems. And you, as you said, you're disabled. So yeah, anybody watching this is not going to get that. They're not going to understand. So explain to people what it is you've gone through.

It's an invisible illness. Obviously, I had— we've just touched on my adolescence. I was in the police service. And I ripped 7 ribs away from my spinal joint. And so I got a really severe back injury. And even though I was detective, I ended up ripping the old scar tissue. So I got retired from the police service. I've obviously told you about how I then become a medium. And so I literally reached the heights that any medium could get to. I was working with the most famous mediums. Not that that's anything, but the whole point is, is that I— anything you want to aspire to, whether it's TV, I did TV, I was touring all over the country, just about to come over to America and Australia. I had my first book that was just about to go out. Everybody wanted Nicky Allen. And And I loved it. But I was still living with my demons from the past. So mentally, I wasn't there. Spiritually, I was, and I just spent my life giving to everybody. And I could feel myself tiring. I was in the wrong relationship. And I was aware of these things, but I just ignored them because I was on the Nicky Allen ride. And it's exactly what I described in Rise and Fall, and Me, Myself and I. And then literally, I'd come to do this weekend with Derek Corley and Colin Fry down in a place called Torquay, which is in Devon, which is all coastal, stunning. It's near Cornwall, south of the UK. And it is stunning. And I walked into this hotel and said, I'm going to live here. I'm going to live here. And I knew I would. And I started coming down here. I was doing workshops in a local community area down here. And I decided to rent somewhere and spend a few months down here just to make sure I definitely wanted to and start house searching. And the first day we got down here, my partner at the time was driving. Whoa, I won't even— oh, it's horrible. It's like Voldemort. He's described in both books. And we were driving, we were just turning into a pub to have something to eat. And this girl that just passed the test the day before T-boned us, and I was in the passenger seat. I had to be taken out of the car by paramedics But long story short, after a day and night in hospital, they're like, it's just soft tissue damage. I said, it can't be. I cannot tell you the most— I was in the most excruciating pain, blurred vision, hot and cold. It— I just— and so exhausted that I collapsed on the floor when I tried to get out of the bed. Um, and they said, no, it's just shock, you'll be fine. So, and then they then discharged me. I come home, spend 24 hours sleeping, wake up, the lights were like hot molten lava in my eyes. And I collapsed on the floor. I was incontinent. I was in the most agonizing pain that I just wanted to die. That's how much pain it was. This went on for a year. The problem with that was I had tours booked, I had theater shows booked. I had, you know, I had like 500 people on a waiting list for readings. And so like an idiot, I refused to let the pain and exhaustion get hold of me. And so I would even do shows in theaters on a settee or a sofa. I couldn't sit on a normal chair because the pain was unbearable. A year, I think it was after about, I think it was about a year or so, I got diagnosed with ME, which is chronic fatigue syndrome, and fibromyalgia, which was from a brain trauma injury from, from the accident. Accident, even though there was nothing broken. Um, and then what happened was I tried to ignore it. I tried to do the placebo thing. No, there's nothing wrong with me, nothing wrong with me. And I ended up collapsing halfway through a show that I did. Um, I can't believe I did that. And I pushed myself to my limit, and my body just went, it's not happening. So I then spent 5 years in bed, um, because I physically could not get up. I couldn't get out of bed. I was wheelchair-bound. I had to have carers. And I lost everything. And so me, myself, and I, this book, that darling, I do.

I have to say again, every— you got to get that book. It's just incredible. Yeah.

Thank you so much. And it literally, I was writing my diary to try and get some form of sense. I'd lost my faith. And I just wanted— I was suicidal. And I just thought, no, that's it. I'm done now. Now. I am done. And then my nan come and visited me from the spirit world and told me about a drug that I should try. That got me out of bed. And it improved me somewhat that I could start getting up and doing things. But it's left— it started wearing out about 2 years ago. And because it's a drug that, you know, they don't know long-term effects, they basically said, look, perhaps your body's used to it. Sorry, there's nothing else we can do. So I was back to square one again. And the problem is, with chronic fatigue, you have to pace everything. So for instance, I had to rest all afternoon knowing I was going to be talking to you today. So then I've stayed in bed until 1 o'clock to make sure that I've got enough energy to talk, understand what you're saying back to me, and give you a reply. And also, you know, with invisible illness, God bless the missing millions out there. We don't talk about it all the time. So what you don't know is at the moment my eyes are stinging and my sockets are screaming in my head. I've got headache, neck ache, jaw ache. My hands and fingers are killing me. My back is screaming. My hips, my knees, my thighs, and my feet are swollen. But you don't tell people that, right? They don't. So it is an invisible illness. So even though people think disability should be you're in a wheelchair, you've got no leg, or God knows what, it isn't. Um, because I can't lead a normal life, and it is so infuriating accepting, because right now I'd be touring still, you know, and I'd be going abroad, I would be doing everything that I was doing just before the accident, but it's been taken from me. And so during that transitional time of accepting, grieving, getting over my old life and what I was able to do before, and then thought, right, well, I can't stop wanting to serve humankind. What do you want me to do? And so that's when the tick Oh my God, I had, I had literally— my dad is the TV man, right? So my dad, November last year, the last thing I ever wanted to do was go on TikTok because there's so much negativity on there. And I thought, I really don't need to be exposed to that. Anyway, my TV turned itself on every single night. And then I started to get a bit skeptical thinking perhaps there's an internal alarm in the TV. So then when I thought that, the TV in my bedroom went on. So I had two TVs coming on every night. And then it was about a month and I went, for goodness sake, Dad, I said, I don't know what you're trying to tell me, what you're trying to tell me. And then randomly, just like in ME, Myself and I, when they were pushing me to go on YouTube, which really hasn't gone that far, to be honest with you. They then pushed me— a TikTok thing come up. I wasn't even on it. Yeah, I wasn't even on it. I don't know how it played. AIDS. It came up on some Facebook thing. I went, oh, hell no. And then the following day I said, Dad, seriously, right, if I do one TikTok video, um, don't put the TV on tonight. So I did. TV's never gone on since.

Oh wow.

And so, you know, I've got nearly 90,000 followers and I've only been on there about 8 or 9 months.

Oh really?

I'm reaching a lot of people there, which I'm so happy about. So my life really consists of pacing to do normal things like washing, getting dressed. So I've had to make the effort of getting dressed. My hair looks horrific though, but hey ho, it looks great. And, um, sorry, there's a shadow going on there, like yin and yang.

Yeah, the sun just, just like, it just burst in, blasted out.

Yes, that's so weird because it's been a really dull day today. Yeah, in the UK, who knew?

Well, you know, you know, Nikki, we've touched on so much. And we kind of— you started talking earlier about, you know, why do we have these difficult lives? And, you know, and people get— they push back against this idea of service, this idea of service to humanity. Some of us, we do it for our own personal growth. I think we plan it. Also, it's in service to humanity. You are a shining example of an overcomer. And if people read your book, your first book— I haven't read your second book yet, I definitely want to get it.

How very dare you, Brian D Smith! Did I not send you the manuscript?

I don't believe so.

No, I did. Oh, I wonder why you didn't reply.

Um, okay, well, I will read it, but I, I, I'll send it to you, darling, with my love. Yeah, I want to say that I, like I said, you— I talked to people that have gone through a a lot, you know, and, and we all feel like we're carrying an unbearable burden, whatever it is, because that's how humans are. We— whatever it is we're going through, it's the worst thing ever. And then you read a book like yours, and, and I see you, and I, and I, and I see you on your YouTube channels, and I see you in this interview, and I see your positivity, and I know what you've been through. It's like, that's an overcomer. That's an inspiring story. That's a service to the rest of us. It's says, if she can do it, then I can do it too.

Absolutely. And that's what I think I've been brought here to do. Because I don't, you know, I've got a police pension, I could live very, you know, very humbly, and not have to do anything. No, this isn't about a job or work or money. It's about the fact that there is something in me, it's like a drug, I cannot stop needing to help people. And so I remember doing a meditation where I said to Julianne, am I ever going to get well? He goes, I think the coals have burnt too far for you, Nicola. But you're going to be helping and be a pioneer for all of those that lay in this misery.

I'm sorry, I want you to repeat that. I want you to repeat that so people got it. So that was your guide that told you this?

Yeah, he said, I'm afraid your coals have burnt too much.

Okay.

So I think he was saying, I don't think you're ever going to be properly well. However, you're going to be a pioneer for those that are laying there needing help. And so I have to say, the feedback from the first book, the amount of even now emails every single day from all over the world, thank you for giving me my life back, i.e., I inspire people to find the positive side of their whatever it may be, whether it's chronic illness, loss, whatever it is. And at the end of the day, because another thing my— Juliana said to me was, why do you humans on your experiences always choose the desert?

Desert.

And I'm like, what do you mean? And so he showed me a desert. And then he showed me an oasis, which was abundant with fruit and food and drink and beautiful people walking around in the shade. There was a sparkling rock pool. And he said, in your mind, you have the choice. He even said this in Medici, medieval Italian, and it had to get translated. That's how I'm— that's an— that's in this book. He said, even though he said, you have got whatever you go through, he goes, why do you always choose to walk the desert in your mind? He said, the seed of your mind will bring you the growth you need. Why do you not think of yourself in the oasis? So whenever I get a really, like, for instance, you know, I got flu at Christmas, my sister forgot to tell me there was someone in the house with flu, I I got it, and that was me, because we don't— we have compromised immune system. So I've been in bed since Christmas, basically. All I've seen is my partner and the postman, right? And it's—

and this is 2 and a half months later for people that—

yeah, which is normal for me. So, but there was one day, and I'm like, it was when I was canceling you, when I was postponing you, and I thought, you know what, I can't even sit and talk to someone, what the hell? And I started going down that spiral, and then I remember the desert. And I don't know if it's Julianus coming in, my main guide, saying, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, we don't have any of that. Um, or it's just now my mindfulness says, you're not spiraling down today, Nikki. And so I think, right, what should I do that's positive? So I either do a TikTok video, or I do a YouTube video, or I write just a tiny bit that I can for my new book. So I've got something to be excited about. And one of the things I encourage people with chronic illness We are, as you know, as you see the hashtag MillionsMissing, there are millions sitting in their homes. A lot of them end up taking themselves over because they have nothing. But I've got everything. Because as you said earlier, we're in almost like the Matrix. We can create our realities in our mind. We don't have to physically do it. So when people say to me, oh, what do you do? I'm an author. I'm an inspirer. I do this, I do that. I don't, I can't, don't have to move for that. Just have to talk and pace when I talk to people. And so, and then I will sit outside and I'll listen to the birds sing. Or because I ordered this bungalow, as you all know from the book, this, this house I'm in, the beach is at the end of the road. So if I can manage it, I get to the beach. And I sit on the beach and the dogs run around, I don't have to do anything apart from be and create the oasis in my mind, my mind, rather than think I'm trudging through the desert and being a victim. Him. And this is what I'm trying to inspire people to do. Your physical body might not work, even mental health stops you from working. I, I— part of the condition of ME and fibromyalgia, because I've got both of them, is that you do get depression, you do get massive mental health issues where your brain just goes, forget it, you can't talk today, you can't do anything, you can't communicate, you don't want to communicate, you want to isolate. Everything just shuts down. And that's what I had for a few weeks after the blue. And so I think, right, well, I'll just watch my favorite film then. I can manage that and that'll make me happy. Okay, I'll listen to the best music that I've got that makes me feel really happy. And then I'll perhaps spray perfume from a vacation that I had, and it gives me the sensory memory of the holiday. Um, or I'll put essential oils on and I think, right, I've done that, that's helping me. So there's so many ways to make your oasis more comfortable during the desert days, if that makes sense.

Absolutely.

And that's what I'm trying to do. And everybody goes, how do you—

how are you so positive?

Well, what, you know, do you want me to say, oh my God, life's rubbish? Yeah, spirit world's there. But I'd rather, you know, who wants to listen to that? I don't listen to it myself.

Right?

So, you know, I do lots of mirror work where if I do feel a bit off, I look in the mirror and go, come on, Nick, let's find a way, what we're going to do to make this a good day. Because obviously your body's not great. Your mind's not great. But let's make this a good day.

And, you know, it's really interesting as we're saying this, because we're talking about the spirit world. And in the spirit world, it is much more thought responsive. We can control physical reality with our thoughts. But we're here, we can still control our internal reality with our thoughts. We can't control the external, but we can control how we react to it. We can choose to be grateful. As you said, if I can't do this, I can do this. I can, I can watch a movie, I can listen to some music, I can feel the sun, the sun on your face right now, you know, just feeling this, we can, we can choose that. And that's, that's why we come here. We, we come here for the challenge, you know, and I know people don't like to hear that we, and, you know, people, you know, people look at someone like yourself and say, well, you're so connected to the spirit world, and you've got these guides, why don't they just heal you? Why don't they just, you know, make you better? Because that's us being stuck in this mindset, like this life is supposed to be easy. And it's not supposed to be easy.

Exactly.

What is the point of coming down here? But this is what I mean by going back to the young souls, there's no point coming down here and having the easiest easiest life ever. But everything drops in your lap. However, when you want to create a reality which is for the goodness of you, or for what you need to do on your path, it will come. So I always know when I'm on part of my— I call them landmarks— always know when I'm on the right path to say, well, I want to do this. And it's like the second book, I chose not to go with the publisher the second time around, um, for various reasons. And I said, well, I need an editor then. Poof, I suddenly get this message, this email from someone saying, I've just seen your writing and that you're talking about another book, would you like any help?

Hmm.

Okay. And it's the same with the illustrator, you know, you suddenly— and everything works, it goes, you go, thank you very much, universe. So to a certain extent, we can create our reality here by just sending the thought out. So I say, well, I'd like to do this. And another, again, Juliana, so I should just write a book on Juliana Brian D Smith's messages, to be fair. Because another thing he said to me was, I said, you know, all about this creative cosmic ordering, if you like, creating your own reality. And I went, well, how does it work? And he said, well, just send the thought out of what you feel you deserve. And if it does resonate with your life path, we will provide it in multitudes. So he said, the problem with human beings is, is he goes, put it this way, he doesn't call it a taxi, but for shortening it, he says, just imagine you get in a taxi, cab, and the driver turns around and says, where do you want to go? And you stay quiet. How's he going to know where to take you? He can't take you to the destination you want. You have to tell us, you have to express to the universal pulse of the whole of existence what you intend, where you want to go, what you want to be. And this is where all the quantum planes come in, you know, where you kind of go out of your energy and say, right, this is what I want to create. I don't want to get too deep. I try and keep it very, very simple for people. Not that people are simple, I don't mean that. But there, you know, when we start talking about dimensional realities and all that, it gets too complex. I like to keep it simple. Hence why I do it very down to earth in my writing in the books. But literally think, create, where do you want to be? What do you want to do? And so I now know that one of my things is reality is I will create that third book and it will go out. And so that's my next goal for this year.

Right.

You know, or for instance, even silly things like, I feel like my, my boiler is going to break down, I need a plumber, can someone just send me one that's going to be great. And then suddenly something will ping up on Facebook or whatever. And I, and it's, and they say, oh, I just had a plumber, he was so good and so reasonable. I'm like, thank you very much.

Yeah.

So I feel like I'm pulsing with the universe of creating reality. Everything I asked for, it delivers in the most magical way. And if I can give just one person that, it's not a gift, that awareness, that willing to connect and go, okay, I'm going to give this a go. And then they find it works.

Yeah, well, it's interesting because this universe is— it's both. It's more mental than we perceive some ways, you know, but it's, but it's not as thought responsive, doesn't respond as quickly to thought as, as the other side. But there's also this physical reality. And there's also this life plan that we have when we come in. And especially if we're, if we're more— I don't like the word more advanced. And we're all souls of the same age, but it's like more experienced souls. Yes, we're more experienced souls, then we will take on the challenges. And the younger souls will look at that and say, well, why would you do that? That's crazy. Because this place— it's funny, because I debate this with one of my mentors, whether this place is we come here to learn or whether, you know, it's different reasons and stuff. But I think this place we come to learn, we come to grow, we come to experience, we come to be challenged. This is not a vacation land. This is not someplace you come necessarily have fun. You can have fun while you're here. But that's vacation land, because there, you want to be at the beach, you're at the beach, you want to be on the top of the mountain, you're on top of the mountain.

Yeah, absolutely right. And I've seen it and I've created it myself. Because lots of when you, when you become more developed, and when you're meditating, sorry, meditating a lot, and you're getting into the theta brainwave state, alpha brainwave state, and I can create lucid dreaming. So there's times where I've been woken up. And then I go back to sleep and I connect myself back in where I want to be in a dream and create what I want to do in that dream as well. And so that is like being a spirit person as well. But you're absolutely right, there is a delay here because we've got this dense meat suit we're wearing for a start. We're full of dense energy. And the other problem that I'm, I'm sensing from the universe or the planet at the moment, there is so much much hate, anger, frustration, control. There's obviously all of that because we're abusing the planet. We're getting all these horrific disasters. Obviously, we just had the one in Turkey here where there's been an earthquake killing thousands of people. And we had COVID. And, and please don't get me wrong on this either, anybody that watches this, because there's going to be people that have lost people to COVID. But you've got to look at the natural reason for that. Why did that happen? Was it like the Black Plague? Are we taking some humankind off the planet because there's too much going on. Is there too many people on the planet? And, you know, I've, I've, I've had meditations with Archangel Ariel, who is the archangel of the planet and the animal kingdom, and she's outraged by how we're abusing the planet. But nobody's going to care about nutty old me talking about an angel that's like, do you know what, this planet's— and so it's almost like her and Gaia are kicking back saying, you know, this is your place to learn and you're abusing your playground.

Yeah.

And you know, I can't watch the news anymore, darling, because all it is is murders, shootings, hate and pain. And it's like, wow. So that's why there's people like me and you continuing in the background, working love, working awareness, working esoteric knowledge to these people to try and balance out this energy. Because it's still so up in the air. When I tune tuning in to the planet energy, it's like, oh my God, it's just chaos. I can't find or feel any peace at the moment. So I feel we've still got another year or so of everything up and down. And I don't know if you've had this, but they're talking about controlling zones that we're allowed to go in over in the UK at the moment. And it's like the Hunger Games are starting, you know what I mean? I don't know what district I'll be in. But, you know, they're trying to say that we can't go more than 15 miles from where we are. And it's all going to be zoned and all the rest of it. And it's just me thinking, it's just humankind taking everything out again. And it just— I just wonder if there's going to be another ark soon and a big flood.

Yeah, yeah, we are in, we are in quite a dilemma. But we are here, you and I, to, to be lightworkers, to try to try to raise the level, to try to raise our— and as we raise our own consciousness, we actually raise the consciousness of everybody. We are, we are not as individuals we think we are. Nikki, we're gonna have to, we're gonna have to stop, but I definitely need to have you back on again. It doesn't— it shouldn't be as long. I love having these conversations with you. And I, and I love the way you, you help me present this perspective. And again, I tell people, we want to talk about your books. When you read these books, when I've read the first one, but when you read the book, you, you can't read it and not believe. I don't know how you can, because you give evidence, you talk about. You predict things are going to happen, and then they happen. You get stuff from your guides, and you look it up, and it's real. So for anybody that's a skeptic, for anybody who doubts, you know, get the book.

Thank you so much. Yeah, I hope so. Because the number one thing I wanted to get out of this book is, is to bring comfort to grieving people that, look, this is what I've got to present to you, you know, almost like they're the jury. This is what I'm presenting to you. You. If you think for one minute there's no afterlife, then I don't know what else I can give to you. You know, because there are some, there are some mind-blowing stories. Again, luckily, because I journalize some of the amazing readings I do, and I've recorded them before in the past, I've got it all. I've got it all. So it's all exactly how it happens. There's no memory or, oh, I did this a few years ago. It is word for word exactly what happened. So I'm very proud of it. And I do hope it's going to bring comfort to many people. I know at the moment, the American— the Americans— see, this is my brain fog. This is the problem. In America, I don't think it's known about as much at the moment. So it's lovely to be able to speak to you and try and get across the pond. Because most of the people are from Europe that are actually buying the book at the moment. And even just to spread that knowledge to another country, makes my heart just grow and bloom. And it gives me the impetus to say, you're doing good here, you're spreading light, get the next book done.

Let's do this again. And we don't— we will talk about the book more too. But we can just talk about like your experiences. We'll talk about what you know about the afterlife. Absolutely. 100%. So Nikki, tell people where they can reach you.

My website is nickyallen.co.uk. Okay, if you go on TikTok, Nikki Allen Psychic, I do it. I do daily videos, answer questions, all sorts of readings, paranormal stuff like that on there. On YouTube as well. I'm on there, Facebook, Nikki Allen. So if you just put Nikki Allen Psychic Medium, A-L-A-N, you'll find me pretty much anywhere. And I'm open to all your questions. You can, you know, the best ways to email me, which is NikkiAllen333@gmail.com, if you want to know anything. Because there's so many questions everybody has. And I'm trying to get all the answers in all the books. It's just getting the time and the body to do it.

Yeah, there is, there's so much. And, you know, I talk to people every day, they're, they're confused. They're like, there's so much out there. And I'm like, you, we all have to sort through it. We have to integrate it, we have to take what resonates with us.

Don't worry about the other stuff.

You know, just if it doesn't resonate with you, I say let it go. If it doesn't bring you comfort and peace, then just let to go.

Yep, the spider analogy. You sit on a— he sits on a web. I watched it once and I thought, my God, that's the answer. And this little, this little bit of— I don't know what it was, bit of dirt or something— sprang into his cobweb. And I watched him come out straight away because there was something weighing his web down. And he grabbed it straight away, looked at it and thought— and I just could see it as it happened— is this useful to me?

No.

So he just flicked it off, mended the web, went back in.

Yeah.

And that's the most powerful thing I've ever seen. If something is hanging on your web, see if it needs to. If it doesn't, get rid and stay light.

Absolutely.

Nicky, again, thank you so much for being here and enjoy the rest of your day.

Thank you for having me. God bless, darling. Take care.

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