Heather Allison- Awakening The Divine Feminine

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Hi there, welcome to Grief to Growth Podcast. Your host is Brian D Smith, spiritual seeker, bestselling author, grief survivor, and life coach. Brian believes that the worst tragedies of life provide the greatest opportunity for growth. Brian says he was planted, not buried, and he is here to help you grow where you've been planted by the difficulties in life. In each episode, Brian and his guests will share what has helped them to survive and thrive. It is his sincere hope this episode helps you today.

Hi everybody, this is Brian. I'm back with another episode of Grief to Growth. And today I've got with me Heather Allison. And Heather is an activator of those who are here to be activators. She's a divine feminine guide for divine feminine guides. She helps people to kind of find who they are, to find out what they need, what they should be doing in life, what they're here to do. She had a sudden spiritual awakening at the age of 40 years old. And she started teaching the deep feminine archetypal energetic and consciousness principles she teaches today. So I'm gonna keep her bio pretty short. I want to bring Heather in and just let Heather talk about her story herself. So with that, I want to welcome to Grief to Growth Heather Allison.

Thank you so much. Super happy to be here.

Yeah, it's really good to have you here, Heather. Most of my audience is, are people who are kind of looking to find themselves, trying to figure out, you know, why we're here, all those types of things. But I always like to start off when I have guests on because people want to know, who you are. So tell me about your story.

Yeah, um, we kind of alluded to this in the, in our little pre-chat that, um, I know you shared that a lot of the people that you have on here kind of tend to have like a large event that, that kind of kicks off their connection to something beyond, something higher. Um, and a lot of times some aspect of a really, you know, traumatic or or grief-stricken event. Mine was, I dare say, almost mundane in how it happened. It wasn't, but I really was just kind of, you know, doing what you do and living your life and trying to figure things out and trying to find what my place in this world was and trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing with my life and all of those things. And trying to find love that was the right form of love. Like I'd been divorced and had a really traumatic marriage and left that, had a couple other relationships. And, and it was really through the process of trying to kind of figure out what was missing in my life, both professionally and relationally, that I ended up through a series of events finding some work that just really resonated with me really strongly. And it was kind of based in this feminine masculine energetics. And ultimately I wanted to learn this work so that I could, you know, find a love relationship that was finally going to feel like the right one. And that was really my goal. And I resonated with it so strongly that I was like, I just want all of this information. So I actually went and looked at this woman's website and I was like, does she— I just want all of it. So how is there anywhere that she teaches all of it? And she was offering a coach training program and I was like, well, I have a job. I don't really care about becoming a coach. I didn't even know it was like an industry at that point. And I signed up for that. I ended up getting laid off from my job the day before it started, which was about 6 months later, and was like, okay, well, I'll just, you know, those little nudges that you have from spirit from the universe that you're like, all right, so something's being orchestrated perhaps because the timing was so, so interesting. Um, and I went through that training and obviously immersed really deeply into this, this work, this archetypal work and the feminine work. And about 6 or 7 months later, um, I had a dream in which I was in an ancient Egyptian temple and this man appeared to me and offered to be my teacher. And I said yes in the dream. He guided me deeper into the, into the temple and took me into like a sacred room or a sacred library and showed me, you know, these like sacred texts and things like that, introduced me to other, other people who are going to be teaching me as well. And I woke up and I was just like, cool, cool dream, you know. I was like, that was amazing. But that was kind of the extent of my, my, you know, what I thought that meant. But a couple, probably about a month later, I started having all of these things start happening in my, in my waking life that were pointing back to this dream and things that were I had heard or been told or seen in the dream were showing up in my waking life. And I was like, wait a minute. And so it was just over the series of like, very persistent messages and like synchronicities and things that were just showing up that I was like, I kind of can't ignore this anymore, that this is— it was too much to be just coincidence. And so I sat down at some point and was just like, listen, if, if I was like, is this— is this guy actually trying to talk to me? Maybe there's something to this. And I sat down and I meditated, and I was, um, with a lot of rules and a lot of parameters because I was freaked out by it because I was like, I don't know, is this a ghost? What's happening right now? Um, and, um, and it was just like, you can— if you're trying to talk to me, then you can talk to me and you can show me things and you can say things to me. But other than that, like, this is my space. There's, you know, you're not allowed here. And, and he did. And it was kind of, as I describe it, like fall out of my chair in awe with the things that I was receiving and hearing and seeing. And, and it's just deepened and opened from there into other guides that are also on the other side, or higher beings or what have you. And yeah, it's kind of been a continual journey of being mind-blown and receiving the teachings that I now teach to my clients.

Yeah. Well, you know, you know, it's interesting, because before we did get started, I did mention to you, and a lot of my, my listeners and myself were kind of cracked open by a specific event, but it doesn't always have to be that way. And the other thing is grief can come in many forms. So It can be something like the loss of a marriage or the loss of a relationship, or even just that general feeling like, I don't know why I'm here. This is not— this is just not satisfying me.

Yeah, I agree. And that's actually something I was going to mention, is I did completely lose myself in my marriage. I mean, I was, I was an absolute shell of the woman that I had been before I entered it. And I talked about it as being kind of like encased. I felt like I was encased in like 3 feet of ice. Like, I just— it was there was no reaching the real me in that, in that relationship. I mean, it took a long time to kind of come back out of that. So I really did feel like, you know, loss of innocence, loss of who I was, loss of my essence, loss of, you know, what I, what I had thought was a really beautiful relationship was very much not. And then ultimately to kind of the grief aspect that I feel like I experience most often is the last one that you, that you talked about as far as like my, my spiritual journey is this this like ache that is, I know that there's something that I'm supposed to be doing here. Like, I know that there's something in my bones that feels like it wants to come through, that feels like it wants to be lived into, that feels like it wants to be expressed. And it is so pain— like, for me, like this deep existential pain of, of what if I miss that? What if I don't understand what that is? What if I get that wrong somehow? What if I I am being kind of so much in my forgetting, if you will, in this lifetime that it just passes me by and I never, I never get a chance to be that fulfilled. That for me, it's like this existential kind of like soul separation grief, if that makes sense. Yeah, that's actually a lot of what I do in my work really is I call it a destiny accelerator just because that sounds great. But, but it really is like the, you know, helping women come into the calling that they can feel. Whatever that looks like in their life, that deep calling that would feel like death, and like absolute, like severance between self and soul if you actually weren't able to bring that into manifest.

Yeah, well, that's, I think that's really interesting that we were talking about that. And you said that because I just recently put up a podcast I did with someone named Harmony Quaker, and she talks about this separation from herself. And so again, that's another type of loss. It's another type of grief. And I think when we come into this world, we do take on the veil, we take on the forgetfulness. And this is a little— I think it's a game we kind of play with ourselves and see if we can get it back. And until we get back to that, if we listen to our souls, if we, if we, if we really, you know, slow down a little bit to figure out we're not this is not satisfying me. This is not making me feel fulfilled. And as you said, in your marriage, losing yourself, which I think a lot of us do, we feel like we're always playing a role. And we don't know who our true selves even are anymore.

Yeah. Yeah. And I actually believe, I mean, I do, I see, I see it too, the same way you do, like, kind of, it is a little bit of this, like the great game, right? Is kind of the forgetting so that we can remember. But my experience of it too, is that it's actually, it plays such an important role, just in, in in how we, how we get to feel the things that we remember when we remember them, like the, the actual kind of emotional activation that we have when, when there's the aha moment or when there's the, the, you know, piece of remembrance that drops in when there's the breakthrough. I feel like those moments are so much more embodied because they're kind of— because it's those moments of popping through the membrane, if you will. Like they're the, you know, if it was just I kind of have an idea, but then there's like sort of a little bit of remembrance. It's like it wouldn't quite have the same impact. And like this, like that we, you know, it's kind of that gaspy feeling that we're like, oh yeah, that feels like that's when it's like rushes through our whole body. That's when it's really deeply embodied and we can't forget it again, if that makes sense.

Yeah, I think that makes absolute sense. So, um, so when you, you went through this and I was looking at your website a little bit before we got on here, I guess you actually got on Google started looking for. So what did you search for on Google? I'm curious.

So there are two Google— I'm not sure which story you're talking about, but the— in the first, it was when I was just like, I am so— because I've been married and then I'd had two other relationships and both of them failed, and I was like, what is going— you know, I didn't know why I was like either picking the wrong man or it was just that I was somehow not, you know, able to hold on to it. Really, I don't know which one it was, or maybe it was a little of both, but I was kind of doing some of that desperate Googling that you do in the middle of the night when you're like, there has to be an answer, there has to be some kind of an answer. And that's when I found the, that work by the woman that was basically kind of like the seed of me finding this feminine and masculine energy work. But the other Googling thing that I did, and so I'm not sure which one you're referring to, was when my, I call him my cosmic teacher, that man who approached me in the dream, and then now kind of He speaks to me and teaches me from beyond the veil. When I remember one time I sat down and I was meditating, this was probably like within the first couple of months of starting to kind of learn from him. And he showed me a symbol and I was like feverishly trying to draw it in my journal, you know, trying to like get it to get it down. And I was like, I don't think I'm getting this right. Like, this is not quite— I'm not— I can't— it was complex. And I was like, can you help me Google it? And I just asked for him to help me Google it. And the music I happened to be listening to to do at that moment, I heard a lyric in it, and I, for some reason, knew that that's what he wanted me to Google. And I was like, doesn't really make sense because I'm pretty sure I'm just gonna get like song lyrics and, you know, the album cover and the art, you know, and information about the band and stuff like that. Um, but I did it because that's, you know, I'm like, sure. And, um, I hit Google Images after I put in the, the, uh, the lyric And of course, you would expect, like, the first few are, you know, the album cover and whatever else about the artists. And but like the fourth image over was the symbol that he'd shown me, and I nearly fell out of my chair. Like, it was the Sri Yantra, if you're familiar with it. And so the sacred geometry mark that I hadn't been familiar with until that moment, but I was like, I don't know how you just did that, but I have that conversation all the time. Like, I don't know how you're doing what you're doing, but this is like, it blows my mind. Those two feel like the biggest kind of like Well, I do a lot of what I call intuitive Googling, so I kind of make use of Google quite a bit. As far as, you know, my cosmic team now sends me on kind of goose chases every once in a while, like, you know, breadcrumbs that they give me, and they end up taking me to more information through Google, which is kind of fascinating how it all weaves together.

Yeah. So it sounds like you've trusted your intuition, or you do trust your intuition.

Yeah. And I teach my clients this too, that there is kind of an art to that intuitive Googling as well, where you just, you know, put in some search terms and see what you find when it comes to kind of, you know, symbolic meaning or what have you. But then it's not like you're, you know, doing like a research paper where you're finding all the information that you can possibly find. You're really like letting yourself be guided into what you click into, and then you're letting yourself be guided into what actually creates some, some kind of resonance. For you when you read it. Again, I feel like this is like I mentioned, the forgetting is on purpose so that the remembrance can feel like resonance, so that remembrance can actually vibrate us into a knowing, if that makes sense. And so they do the same thing even with those little tiny breadcrumbs that we get as well.

Yeah, well, I think it's interesting, this game that we play, as I refer to it. I think it is like we come here to forget so that we can remember again. But we do— we're never really alone, you know. And I think we a lot of times feel like we're alone. And when you open yourself up, because you mentioned journaling, were you journaling before you had the dream of your guide?

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You know, one of the hardest things about grief, most of the people in your life just don't get it. They want you to be further along than you are. They get uncomfortable when you bring it up. So you stop bringing it up. And that's why I started writing. My Substack is where I go deeper. Thoughts I don't always get to on the podcast. Essays on consciousness, on continuing bonds, on what it actually means to carry a loss and still build a life. The stuff that used to keep me up at night, written out in a way that I hope meets you in the morning. But here's what I didn't expect when I started it. The community that showed up. People who are doing exactly what you're doing. Listening, learning, trying to find their footing. Readers who comment, who share their own stories, who remind each other that none of us are as alone in this as we feel. And that's what the Substack has become— a place to go deeper with me and to find your people. It's free to subscribe. Find me at grief2growth.com/substack. That's grief, the numeral 2, growth.com/substack. Or just go to Substack and search for grief Grief to Growth. I hope to see you there.

If I was, it was barely. I mean, I did. I had some things, but I mean, I would probably go months and months and months without, you know, and then something interesting would happen and I would journal about that. But it definitely wasn't a practice. And it definitely— I was not in the habit of having conversation, if that makes sense.

Right.

I'd even done some work with a really dear friend of mine, Elisa Romeo. She wrote a book called Meet Your Soul. And so I did some work with her and met my soul, you know, through her work, through her practice. But even that, I kind of felt like I was making it up. And so I really wasn't even in conversation with my soul in that way that she, she guides and suggests either. So it didn't become something that I— now I really believe, like you're saying, like there's, there's communication, there's language, there's, there's a dialogue that happens like everywhere, everywhere. And there's so much support and there's so many beings and ancestors and spirit and energies that are here to support us and be a part of our team.

You just said something really interesting that I understand, but some people listening may not understand when you say meet your soul, because people might say, well, I am my soul. So what does it mean to meet your soul?

Yeah, so, and Elisa talks about this probably a little bit differently in her book. I do some of the same some similar work with my clients, especially like now that I have a really deep connection with my team and my soul. I've kind of started working with her and with my team a bit differently. But for me, it's like, yes, of course we are our soul and our soul is us. And but there is, like you said, there is this veil of forgetting. There's this membrane kind of over, you know, like if I always like to talk about it as being like the tip of the iceberg, we're just this tiny little piece We're this tiny little bit of our, of our soul. We're the, the, the consciousness that necessarily has to forget being the full remembrance of our soul. And so for me, it's really important to have a dialogue with the wholeness of her or him. But, you know, like the wholeness of most of my clients are women, so I get in the habit of saying her, but, but be in dialogue with and understand the language and how she speaks to us in so many different ways in our bodies and our sensations and our dreams and our, in our intuition and in our emotions even. And so that— and learn what it is that she's saying through those channels, through those, through those languages so that we can tap into her. Because, I mean, I can't tell you how many times, even just sitting down on my mat to meditate, like I would prefer— like small me wants to do, you know, maybe work with a crystal or pull some cards or like whatever that might be. Like I have ideas about what I want to do or even just in my life or in my business. Small me has ideas, small me has impulses, small me has— and there's nothing wrong with small me, but you know what I'm saying? Like, we— I have— I have— small me has ideas and impulses and desires and things that I could pass off as being soul-guided. But more often than not, when I actually check in with her, there's a different frequency that she feels different than just me. So she feels like, like the, the whole voice, the whole self, the the divine self. She is like, she's the one who holds my map. And I'm here remembering and, and receiving guidance about how to walk that path.

Yeah, I love that. She's the one that holds your map. I think that's really cool. Because I— this is a relatively new concept for me. And it's something that I'm really just really started to dig into and understand is that the small me that you talked about, because that's, that's the human part of us.. And we feel like when we're here that we are human, and that we are, and that we are just human. But I think there's a bigger aspect to us, the oversoul, or the Self with a capital S, or however term, where you use higher souls, and people use that, or higher self, that is the wise one, the, the eternal one, that kind of spins us off into this little piece of ourselves. That navigates this world. And we don't have the map as, as the, as the avatar that we are when we're here, as much as we would like to think we do.

We don't. Yeah, exactly. And, and so she really, in my experience of this, is she— and again, I'm sorry, like, he or she, depending on how, you know, you will— but you, she has a completely different tone to her voice than, than what even your wise self brings to the table. Like, I consider myself to be, you know, I have a wise self as well, but it's a completely different tone of voice than my soul. Like, where the more you work with your soul, it becomes unmistakable. And most of the time she speaks to you in a way that like has you like, oh yeah, like it has you, like it vibrates you back to this. Like, I hope I can— is it okay if I swear? Yeah. Yeah. It has you vibrate back into this space of like, oh shit, okay, like kind of that like shakes you to the rafters, you know what I'm saying? Shakes you to the bone where you're like, I can't pretend in my, in my forgetting anymore. I can't pretend in my limited viewpoint, and I can't pretend in my, my ego. As well-meaning as our egos are, I can't pretend anymore. When, when we actually hear her voice, it's like everything just falls away. All the facade just falls away. It can be hard to follow her guidance sometimes. I I often have what I call human tantrums about the stuff that I receive, but I was like, okay, but it feels like the deepest truth that we can touch. And so it's so powerful when we get to really fully connect to her and start learning her language and then stay in devotion to connecting with her, because we do like to get back into our forgetting sometimes.

Well, this veil that we're under, this illusion that we live in, is very, very real. And, and the ego is here to keep us protected and to keep us safe. And the ego wants comfort, and ego wants things to stay the same. And the ego just wants to, you know, what, you know, hard— we don't want to go through hardships, you know, for example. And as I hear you speak, you know, we— I think about like, we talk sometimes we talk about soul planning, and I'd like to ask how you feel about soul planning. But people will often push back against that and say, well, I would never have planned this. And they'll plug in an event. I would never plan this. And the language I'm starting to use now is, yes, as a human, you never would. But as a soul, you might.

Yeah, completely. So when you say soul planning, do you mean like, you know, that, like orchestration by your soul?

Yeah. Do you think that our lives have an arc that, that, that our souls plan, or we plan before we come here, or anybody else?

Yeah, I think this is really complex. I really do feel like— and this is one of the reasons why I think, you know, the— why it's been so profound for me in both, like, learning, being taught the mysteries through my team, but also teaching them now— is it's never so easy as to find, like, a— what's the right template to kind of make sense of everything. It really— it's so complex, and it's so full of paradox. I really believe that Yes, there is so much orchestrated by our souls, including things that we as small selves feel are really, really painful. There are also misuse of free will down here, and, and there are people who are just assholes and misusing that power, right? And so I, I— it's a, it's a, it's a combination of both. Like, there are definitely places where we're operating in wound that our souls would never quote unquote, have chosen for us. But I— but the beautiful part about it is that in my experience, it doesn't really matter which one it is because we get to do with it the same thing. Like the practice of how we navigate it is the same, which is we can assume that it is for us because it's here, just simply because it's here. And we can— I just got chills. And then so we can kind of transform it into being something that helps propel us or helps grow us or helps ready us or helps empower us or helps open our eyes to something or helps make new choices or what have you. There was something else I was going to say in this, and I don't remember what it was. But oh yeah, that's what it was. I have a funny little like anecdote that I always tell my clients. That is, I really feel like there should be somebody who kind of greets you here at the door when you get here as a human, like when you're born and says, hey, welcome to life, like you're going to be uncomfortable here. Which form of discomfort would you like? Would you like the form of discomfort that comes of following your soul, or would you like the form of discomfort that comes of not following your soul? Because she absolutely is going to have really uncomfortable things and even painful things for us to move through. It's just that it's, in my opinion, kind of coming back to that grief. It's like an existential grief and an existential pain when we're not listening to her, when we're not following the path that she has in store for us.

Yeah, well, that's what I like what you just said there. It's like, do you want to choose the pain of following your soul or the pain of not following yourself? Because we are going to have pain when we're here. The suffering, I think, is optional. But the pain is part of the— I think it's part of the process. Yeah. And the paradox is, you know, because people, it's all, you know, people say it's one or the other. There's either free will, or there's predetermination, and which is it? And I think the answer is both. I think that our souls understand that there's certain probabilities, that there's some things when we plan our lives, when we come into this particular body, with these particular parents in this particular nation, whatever we're born in, in this circumstance, there's a really, really good chance that these things are going to happen. But there's also our own free will and the free will of all the people around us. So I think unanticipated things can also happen. But I think the overall arc is kind of planned.

Yeah.

And our soul, our human part of ourselves and say, well, if I were going to plan this life, I'd make it really, really easy. I would just, you know, I don't, I don't want to go through pain. I don't want to go through suffering. But every single person that I've talked to on this program has gone through some sort of existential angst. And some of us, it takes being hit over the head with a disease or an accident or, you know, even Cosmic 2x4, I call those. Yeah. And some people, it's, it's more gentle nudgings. It's some people, it's like, I think it's like our guides are like, No, go that way. And they give you a little nudge. Go that way. They give you a little nudge. And if you're open to it, you can navigate things a little bit easier. Doesn't mean you're going to avoid all the pain, but path might be a little easier.

Yeah. And like I said, if you kind of get into the habit of and the practice of the transformation, right, the alchemy of the things that happen, regardless of how— I also don't believe in kind of measuring grief or pain, or you just can't unless you're in somebody's experience and in their mind and in their bodies, you just, you can't compare. Also granting the fact that there are very much more severe forms of pain and things as well. But if you get in the habit of kind of in that, of being in that alchemy where you're, where you're seeking to turn everything that's painful and everything that happens into something, at least that you can kind of look at it as like creating the rungs of a ladder. Like there's always a way that you can find that it is something that you can step up on top of, that you can use to kind of propel you forward. And you don't have to be so like Stalinist about it and be like, I'm feeling pain. Let's, you know, like you don't have to be militant about how you, how you do this. Like there's time for processing and there's time for falling apart and there's time for just letting yourself be like in, in the dissolution of, of grief and pain. And there's beauty in that as well, as much as it's horrendous. But there's always— I find that as long as there's the holding of the truth that this also can be turned into soil, that this can be turned into fertilizer for growing something and something beautiful, then we can face those. And that for me is what creates the quote unquote ease of navigating stuff like that. It's not that— I honestly feel like what would be the point if we came here and it was just to kind of hang out? And not have any experience. I also feel like even just separation from source in the first place is painful. And so like, I just don't— I don't think it makes sense if we're going to be in any form of separation that there wouldn't be some form of, of that repeating, right? Like, that's what we are really. And that's what archetypes are about, are like the, the repeating patterns that kind of echo out from source. So like, there has to be, there has to be some form of separation, but we can find a way to make that separation sacred.

Yes, absolutely. And I like what you also said about— because when we get into these, these, these paradoxes, this apparent paradox, people will get very adamant about like, it's one or the other. I happen to believe that there is a plan, there's, there's an arc that, that we plan, not someone plans, plans for us. There's not punishment, like if you do a bad thing, you're gonna come back and you're going to experience this. But you might— I think you might choose to But whatever, regardless of what you believe, what we can do, as you said, we can turn it into soil, whatever it is that happens to us, even if it is just random, we can choose, how am I going to use this to serve me? What can I learn from this? How can I let this inspire me? How can I let this make me stronger? Use it to inspire other people, whatever that happens to be. And there is a— I just finished a book by a guy named Christian Sundberg, it's called A Walk in the Physical. And I love that he has pre-birth memories and he remembers, like when they put the veil on, right? So he's his soul. And they put the veil on and he describes like the pain, the emotional pain and the separation, and the feeling of helplessness and all the things that we feel when we're human. And that's part, that's part of the experience of coming here because we do feel separated. Most of us do feel lonely, even when we're around other people.

Yeah, and I think that's like you're saying, it's like it's really hardwired. It's like baked into this. I was getting chills as you were saying that, but it's, it's really baked into this experience because it is, it is degrees and degrees and degrees of separation, right? In order to have a me, and you are a me, and they are all me's listening, and you know, in order to have that, there has to be a separation of, of, uh, selves and of consciousness and stuff like that. So of course that's going to be heavy and there's going to feel like there's something missing. And that, that I think is one of the keys for me and why I love this work so much is because that ache, something's missing or I'm supposed to be doing something beautiful and profound and, and important and meaningful. Those like it is this connection, it is this connection to higher, to soul, to to the mysteries while we also really deeply honor what's here and the mess and the, again, the paradox, right? Like it's both mundane and it's mystical. Like, can we walk the path of both and not one or the other? We are so just, man, do we want either or. We really want the answer that we can just kind of like nail down into the ground and go, cool, got it figured out. Like either or. Like we are so addicted to getting that, but One of the things I like to kind of bring into conversation when— because you've mentioned this a couple of times— that people are like, no, it's either, it's either predestined or I have free will. And I think what we forget is how infinite the universe is. First of all, even the physical universe, but the energetic universe and, and Source and, and energy and all of that. It's what makes us think that it's so limited Right, right. That it wouldn't— that even like that those two things couldn't exist in the same. It's like choose your own adventure. You choose this path, things— the path changes, the choices available change, the twists and turns and the curves in the path change. You choose this one and it's a different set of things. But it is so infinite that there's always the— like your soul or your guides or God or whatever you want to believe, that the infinite universe is always able to kind of put other things in your path so that you can choose again. You know, there's—

yeah, that's beautiful. I love the way you said that. I, um, you know, I was looking— I'm always looking for analogies because we can't really grasp this whole thing with our tiny brains from our limited perspective. And I feel blessed to live in an age where we have video games. And my daughter and I used to love to play video games. And I think it's— I think that's a perfect analogy for what we are. We're like avatars in the video game. And so the designers can plan out the arc of the game, and they've got the things that we're going to meet depending on which path we choose. But as a human being, there are billions of decision points. So every day we're choosing a new adventure. We always get a chance to make a different choice. So we have an overall arc, and I think it's all good. I think it all ends up— we all end up at the same place eventually. But while we're in the adventure, we get to play the adventure that we choose to play.

Yeah, and it's so cool because like we have AI now that we're actually starting to see that even things that we wanted to have like the either-or relationship with, like this is the thing, I program it so it does this, we're seeing the AI can actually learn and fill in and fill in pieces where maybe you make a completely new choice and it didn't have a plan for that route before, but now it's like, oh, but we can, we can create this now. Do you know what I'm saying? And if a computer can do that, why would we think it's different with what we have no real, nothing more than a sliver of understanding about, which is like the energetic universe or the spiritual universe, if you will.

Yeah, it's funny because I'm an engineer, so my background is engineering.

Oh, that's so great. I love it that you're having these conversations now too.

Yeah. And the reason I wanted to be an engineer, I realized years later, is like, I want to write answers and stuff. And my, my actual— my daughter has a friend, a young man, he's like in his early 20s and he's an engineer. And he— so he came over, you know, and we were talking and he's like, you know, Mr. Smith, what's the right answer? Should I buy a house or should I rent? And if I, if I buy a house, how much should I budget for maintenance? You know, because he wants to just have it formulaic. And I'm looking at him, I just kind of smile because I see myself at that age and going, that's not the way life works. You know, it's— there are no quote, right answers. It's a mystery. It's always unfolding. And I'm learning more now about the— our universe is not Newtonian. It's not just cause and effect. There's a whole lot of mystery built into it. We get our— all the free will going on around us of all the other people. We have our own free will. We've got our guides and our loved ones in spirit that are there, and they're nudging things along for us. So there's a movie I want to watch again, I just thought about this week, called The Adjustment Bureau, where it's like they're they're always like putting little nudges in trying to get things to go the right way. And I think it's more like that. It's dynamic.

Yeah, I completely agree. And it's like quantum physics, right? Like, so this is one of the— I love it too. I don't consider myself to be a scientific person or an engineer, although my dad was. But I actually love that this work feels like math to me. It feels like science to me. It feels like there's— because working with archetypes, there is a real intellect in them, if that makes sense. And there's a way of understanding that duality, that either/or and how these things work together. And I love that because it's almost like this mathematical equation that you can kind of make sense of. It's a model basically to make sense of the mystery. But it's like quantum physics rather than algebra or something like that. And what I love about that, though, is that I see even quantum physicists who still scratch their heads about quantum physics. They don't really understand it because there is no understanding it because it's still a mystery. And yet they study it and they gain an understanding of it, like the mysterious and the paradoxical ways that it works. And that's kind of the gist for me is when we start to work with the mysteries, we actually understand it on that level so that we're not sitting here with this furrowed brow kind of trying to find the answer, we find the possibilities. And then we have a lot more information to make our choices because we actually understand the possibilities, if that makes sense.

Yeah, it makes a lot of sense. And I, you know, I try to understand it from a scientific perspective. What I realized what most scientists, what they, what they miss is they think everything is material and everything is— they still think in terms of Newtonian, like cause and effect.. And so they found on the very small level, they found these quantum, uh, effects. They said, but that only works on the very small. And I was listening to Bernardo Kastrup talk about Carl Jung's work. And what I've realized is I, at least the understanding I have right now, it's like the quantum effect, I think, is on the very, works on the very small and on the very large. And that's what we don't understand. We think we have everything figured out because we'll take a little piece of something and we'll say, oh, cause and effect. This causes this. We don't understand it from a very large perspective. And I think that's where the quantum effects come in. That's where our guides and stuff have influences, that they're manipulating our universe in ways that we just really don't understand.

Yeah, I agree. And I think that's just because we're in it, right? We're in this level.

You can't see it from within.

We're in the center of it. So of course we can't see how it works here. We can kind of only look at the the size that we have a relational understanding of, but we can't understand the full scope of everything here because we're in it. We're in the very center of it. Right.

Well, it's like you asked your guide, and I do the same thing. My daughter sends me crazy signs, and I'll say, how did you do that? How do they know to put you in the car at the moment the song is going to come on the radio? Or how do they know to, you know, send you outside at the moment you're going to meet the right person that you're going to meet? Or all these things we don't, we don't understand how that because it's, it's operating on a level that's above the level that we operate on.

Yeah.

So we, you know, it'd be like, again, a character in a video game understanding what the programmer is doing. The character in the video game has no concept of the programmer, except for what's going on in the game.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. The Matrix. It's like, totally. But yeah, I've had experiences. So now that I do journal, I mean, I take— I journal a lot, and I, you know, I constantly get downloads and teachings and things like that. So I have stacks of journals with so many things that I then kind of go back and look at and see what wants to go in my mystery schools and all of that stuff. But, um, I remember there have been a couple of, of things. Once where I was like trying to find, trying to find what was that thing, you know, like trying to go back through all my journals trying to find the thing, and I getting so frustrated and I couldn't find it. I was like, fine, I'll just— whatever, I just give up. And I happened to look over and I look and like the page facing up that was my, my one of my journals from like months and months before was open to was exactly what I was looking for. And I was like, I don't— what? Wait, how did I— didn't see it before when I was looking for it at all. And then other times where I've been guided to a particular date And so I'll go to that date in my journal and then they'll guide me to another date from there. And then like those things will be talking to each other and unfold, like unwrap some of this information that they've been giving me in a way that I couldn't have understood if they'd tried to tell me back then. But now with these, it's just been— I'm like, how do you guys do this? Like, I don't understand. It's really fun though. I think that's one of the things that actually— I think that's another piece. One of the reasons why we forget in order to remember is we get to have these experiences that are like, whoa, which keep us on this path of going like, I'm going to keep paying attention. It's kind of fun to have our mind blown, you know? And I feel like sometimes if we didn't have that, if we didn't have that, again, that kind of experience of remembering things, we wouldn't keep trying to hear more. We wouldn't keep trying to listen more.

Yeah, we get that sense of mystery, that sense of discovery that humans crave. I think we crave that. We crave adventures, you know, even in our lives, you know, we watch movies, we read books that always have the hero's journey. It's always, you start off okay, you end up losing something, you go to find it, you know, I don't know all the— I can't remember all the details of the hero's journey, but it's a full circle. And once you understand that archetype, then you realize that's like the plot of every single movie that we ever watch. Yeah, because we're fascinated with that. We're fascinated with losing something and finding it again, because I think it's built into our souls.

Yeah, we recognize it at a really cellular, visceral level.

Yeah. So tell me about how you work with people. How do you work with people?

Yeah, so there are, I guess, 4 ways of working with me. So my signature offering is the Golden Goddess Mystery School, and that's a 9-month mystery school that I guide for women. I have started working with men. It's just more of a bit of a custom kind of thing so that we can make sure that we're applying the work to more masculine beings, if you will, in a way that feels aligned for them. But yeah, Golden Goddess is the mystery school that is the deepest and the most personal and the most of my personal support. I have a mini mystery school called The Spiral, which is quite a bit lighter in both the journey and the investment, but also personal support for me as well. And then I have my monthly temple, which is called the Inner Sanctuary, which is kind of like if you want a taste of this work, if you just kind of want to get the vibes, if you want to have some Q&A kind of attention from me as well as some great bonuses, that's a great place to start. And then one-on-one, and that's really a bespoke, a custom experience. So whatever anybody wants to kind of create in that realm, we can create together.

So I have to ask you this. Because I work mostly with women. And I've interviewed a lot of women who either exclusively work with women, or if you go to their website, like your website, I see all feminine, the divine feminine. So what's— what is the difference between the divine feminine and divine masculine, if there is a divine masculine? And why the focus on the divine feminine?

I love this question. There absolutely is divine masculine as well. And I think one of the biggest misnomers or misunderstandings is that like the feminine is for women and the masculine, divine masculine, is for men. And it's not the case. We have both within us. It's literally like the, the, the aspect of duality and how, how creation creates within us and through us. So we all have masculine and feminine. But the reason why there's so much focus, especially these days, on the feminine is because she's the aspect of us that we've been vilifying and rejecting and burying and teaching ourselves, or like being conditioned to, and teaching, you know, one another to fear and to devalue in so many different ways. And that's from a really, like, deep archetypal, just like psyche kind of way, but also in really, like, kind of, again, more mundane aspects like suppression of emotions, fear of certain emotions. You know, it's not appropriate to have emotions in the boardroom. Intuition has been put on a back burner, like either disbelieved or devalued or just something that we don't think has any merit and worth in things like business or in things like, you know, more rational, linear, linear things that we do in this life. Our bodies, like how often do we prioritize what we think and what we need, you know, like the rationality over the rest of our body and what our body needs and how little we listen to our bodies these days. So it's, it's a lot. And so the reason it's— there's a focus is because it's more dire to bring her back into our awareness and into our practice and into our embodiment, if that makes sense. But also because She is, she is everything internal, eternal, and expansive. And so starting with her, beginning with her, and really like starting to work with her again, men and women, we, we are touching into the things that are really, truly most important and really, truly the things that we crave most, like love. You can't put that on a spreadsheet and figure out how to have that. Like none of those things can we, can we plot with linearity. And so if we, if we make more room for her to kind of be our guide and then bring in our beautiful sacred masculine to kind of take action for and be decisive about and be devoted to and uphold and, and like create the structure for what we want, what we understand that we want, or what our intuition is telling us or what, how we feel or how we want to feel. That's, that's the co-creative aspect coming alive within us, if that makes sense. I get very heady about this stuff because it's so much, but I love it, so I get really excited about talking about it.

Oh yeah, and that was a beautiful explanation, and I wanted to give you the chance to do that because I, I definitely understand that. I think, um, the, the last couple thousand years— I don't even know how long it is— the, the masculine energy— and again, it's not the male energy necessarily, even though males have dominated in so many ways has driven out the feminine. And it kind of goes back to what we were talking about before, trying to understand the universe as this rational Newtonian place, cause and effect. Everything's about brute force, taking action, as opposed to listening to what's within, you know, not trusting our intuition, thinking that we can, we can study everything and analyze it, understand it from within the system, which is just crazy. And so I think that it makes sense that we need to, to balance things out from these hundreds or thousands of years that we've, we've neglected the divine feminine. And I think that's part of what's destroying our planet and is hurting our relationships, because we don't value that aspect of ourselves. And we all, we all have, and we all need both.

1000%. Yeah, it's the reason why we also are you know, think that we can and should conquer nature, right? And like, you know, bend it to our will, if that makes sense, and like have it do what we want it to do rather than finding a way to be in this— like one of her energetics, one of the feminine energetics is wholeness. But you can't have wholeness when you only have it for part of the whole, you know? And so it's like we don't think about other people, let alone the planet and nature and other beings and things as important. It's very— it's become a very like, well, wholeness for part of of the whole, but that's not wholeness. And so it's been a very wounded form of wholeness. And so that's again one of the, one of the other reasons why it's so important to bring her, bring her in, is because she is that embodiment of both/and, right, rather than the either/or, which is why there's so much paradox in this work. But it's so powerful, like when we can learn how to walk with paradox both in our own lives and like existentially, spiritually, everything makes so much more sense and it, it becomes so much, so much more fluid and so much more ease-filled and so much more harmonic. Like the, the gist of, of the work I feel like I'm here to do is to really help us find Eden, right? Really help us find and embody and live into the idea of like a heaven on earth where we can actually be in harmony with one another. And we can— I mean, I know that that's all very lofty for some people, like, look at the state of this world right now, but got to start somewhere. You got to begin.

Yeah, you know, that's, that's another one of those, I think, paradoxes, because I've heard people talk about— it's interesting, because I actually interviewed someone that talks about living in the fifth dimension. Some people say we're moving into the fifth dimension. And then other people say, well, that's not what the world is designed to be. You know, this is supposed to be a 3D place. This is supposed to be a dualistic place, a place of conflict. And we, we kind of come here for this. That's, that's a paradox that also, it's kind of like, it is what it's supposed to be. But we're also here to try to make it better. That's I think that's our work. That's our practice. That's how we grow ourselves, is not by just saying we're just going to accept it for the way it is, because that's the way it's supposed to be. But how do we all work together to create a better reality?

Yeah. And that goes back to what we talked about earlier. Like, first part of this conversation was like, it's got to be both mundane and mystical. It can't just be one or the other. And I think one of the things that gets missed in the whole, like, dimensional conversation is it's not about getting from 3D to 5D, nor is it about only concentrating on the 3D. Like nobody talks about 4D and how 4D is actually the both/and of those things. That is the bridge. It is the combination of them. It is the harmonizing of them instead of like these being places where I get to graduate from the 3D and get to the 5D. Because what we're looking for again is like, is the harmonics, right?

Yeah. I mean, you know, as you said that, I realized, yeah, nobody ever talks about 4D. It's like 3D, 5D.

Yeah.

So, um, what— how would someone know that it's time to work with you if they, if they search within themselves? What would they— what, what kind of person do you work with?

Well, my favorite answer to that question is, is how a lot of women end up joining Golden Goddesses. They just feel something vibrating in them when they're listening to me or when they're reading some of my work, and they just kind of have this, like, I feel like I'm supposed to be in there and I don't know why. That's probably one of my favorites because they're, they're actually starting listen to the mysteries, if that makes sense. And when— and taking honor, taking action in honor of them. But women come here for— and like I said, I am starting to work with men more, but women come here really for 4 different things. They come here, then overarching one is they feel like something's missing, or there's something big and important that, you know, and like something that can only be found in energetics or in the mystical or beyond kind of what makes sense in this world that is important for them to find or important for them to bring through. But they come here either for love, whether that's to find love or to heal their relationships, and they come here for business. So I have a lot of women who come here wanting to get out of like the old wounded business tactics and business paradigm and things that have us really like just in this hamster wheel and like playing the game and, and really like, like hustle mentality and all that stuff. And they want to find that more useful and more soul-guided form of business. Spiritual. So women come here to have their connection to their soul and their guides and their cosmic team, like I found, and to like increase their, their, their ability, their vesselhood, if you will, their ability to be guided and their ability to receive from the mystical realms. And then personal power. So really just, you know, I've had women come with a great deal of trauma or a great deal of kind of like feeling something's lost or having patterns that they just keep living into and cycles they keep living into that are really painful for them. And they can't figure out how to how to shift those. And, and so we do a lot of, a lot of work at a lot of levels in here, including simply just finding you and being able to come back to the you that you know that you're supposed to be.

Yeah, awesome. Heather, let people know how they can reach you.

Yeah, you can find me at heather-allison.com. It's two L's.

Awesome. I really enjoyed our conversation, uh, today. Thanks for doing this, and enjoy the rest of your evening.

Thank you so much. I did too. I love this chat.

All right, have a good day.

Thanks, you too.

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