self talk

All right, welcome back to another video. Today I'm going to be talking about self-talk. This is very important, um, so I'm going to go right into it. Why is this so important? Um, some of you guys are probably thinking, it's like, man, when are we going to get to like talking to women and going on dates and the exciting stuff, right? So, but if you don't have the mindset stuff down, you're not going to do well and achieve the actions that it takes To get the woman, right? So this is why we want to focus on the mindset. The mindset stuff is really half the battle. Why is that? Because we're trying to combat approach anxiety, we're trying to combat our limiting beliefs, we're trying to combat our negative self-talk. All of these things can work against us, and usually average Joe guy, it does work against them on a day-to-day basis. So when we focus on our mindset stuff and we're aware of what's going on, we can actually fix, or at least question, why we have the self-talk that we have. So focusing on the mindset is going to give us the success that we need to push forward to be successful with women in the long run. So don't skip this, don't go anywhere. This is going to be another banger, and it's just going to help your inner game to where everything becomes consistent. Because if you can get your mindset down You can be consistent with the action and you can be a consistent person in general to actually get the dream outcome that you want. So this is important. This is definitely important. So starting with negative self-talk, so just in theory in general, that our thinking, the way that we think about things, is just a conversation that our brain is having with ourselves. So, you know, if I think I'm a loser, My brain, or I'm telling myself consciously, I am a loser. And that is a thought. And I want to say that is something that's very important, is you are not your thoughts. Your thoughts come into your head and you have the choice to either entertain that thought or just move on, you know what I'm saying? You don't need to entertain that thought. You are not your thoughts. So if you tell yourself that you're a loser, You don't have to believe it, you know what I'm saying? Yes, the source came from you, but it's still something that you don't have to fold to. But there's so many guys that go into it, and we are wired to be on the alert for negative things, negative outcomes. It's the way that we survive. And I don't want to go into too much, uh, thinking theory, but in reality, it's good for us to be negative wired in a sense so that we don't fall off a cliff or that we don't stab ourselves or harm ourselves. And we're are watchful of negative outcomes and negative things, but sometimes it works against us when it comes to social dynamics and talking to women, where we can tell ourselves negative things on a day-to-day basis. And a lot of the times, as I was saying with goals, that we can become reactive to outcomes. We can become so reactive that every time a negative outcome happens, our negative self-talk— see, You're, you're too old, you know what I'm saying? Oh, you're ugly, you know what I'm saying? You could tell yourself negative things every time a woman rejects you, and it just reinforces your mindset to where you're not even going to want to try to talk to her or anybody. And you kind of just go into this loop that is just very negative and very damaging. So negative self-talk and just thoughts in general is what you're telling yourself on a day-to-day basis. Our mind is wired To some degree, like I said earlier, based on survival, but also it can hurt us when it comes to other things as well. So the goal that we want to do is we want to take the negative self-talk that we have and we want to replace it with positive self-talk. And the only way that we're going to be able to replace negative self-talk is by being aware. Being aware is everything. So I just want to take this time really quickly And just think about what do you tell yourself? What do you think about on a day-to-day basis? When it comes to stuff in general, it's useful. And also, what specifically do you tell yourself when it comes to women? You know, think about your failures or your successes. What does that look like? And those different outcomes that happen in your life, and what did you tell yourself right after that outcome? You know what I'm saying? And more times than not, it's probably going to be negative. It just is. And that's okay. Because we're going to try to help replace that. So what's helpful about it is on a day-to-day basis, we don't think about what we think about. We just react. A lot of us just react. So I encourage you, as you go through your day-to-day, think about what you think about. Think about what you tell yourself and see if it's negative or positive. If it's negative, question why that is, because more times than not, thoughts are always never ever factual. They just just aren't, you know what I'm saying? Everything is objective, you know what I'm saying? Even you saying you're ugly, that's subjective. I could say a woman is a 10, and that's my thought, that's my opinion, but another guy could be like, no, that's a 7, you know what I'm saying? And he has different opinion about it. He has different things he's looking at, you know what I'm saying, to, to determine whether it's a 7 or 10. So opinions are objective. They're not, you know, or no, they're subjective. They're not objective. And so it's very important that we understand That we are not our thoughts and that we don't have to put ourselves down. And when we're aware of the negative thoughts, we can actually do something to change it for positive. So if you think that you're a loser when it comes to women, rethink that. Evaluate why that is, because it's going to affect how you go about your day-to-day. It's going to affect— let's say if I was playing in a— I was in a soccer tournament and I was a soccer player and I tell myself, I suck at soccer, I suck at soccer, I suck at it, and my actions are going to reflect my thoughts. So I'm not going to run down the field as fast enough to, to pass the ball to my teammates or even be available. I'm not going to take the shot. I'm not going to just be good. Even if I do take the actions, I'm not going to be good because I believe that I suck at the game, right? The same thing is true with dating. If you think that you suck or if you're a loser, based off your past failures or whatever reason it is, then you're going to be bad at talking to women. You're going to be extremely nervous. It's going to come from a place of scarcity, and you're going to really have a hard time. So be aware of what you're telling yourself and replace that with, you know what, I'm going to do better. I'm going to actually try to get this going. And we replace it with goals that we have to take action steps. She's like, you know what, I actually took action and I talked to 3 women. So I, you know, that's something that's That's— you could tell yourself in a positive way. There's so many different ways to replace that negativity and just realize for what it is and then just move on. So that's what I have for you guys for self-talk. Be aware of it, replace it with positive self-talk, and just see how much different life is. And this isn't just for dating, this is just in general as well. That can really just change your life with this lesson alone if you really think about it and really apply it. So that's what I have for you guys for this video, and I hope to see you guys in the next one.