I Hit My Ex's Car... 7 Times | B. Lynn
In this candid, unscripted interview, B. Lynn and host SPEAKER B discuss a wide range of personal topics. B. Lynn shares her upbringing, emphasizing her mother's supportive stance toward her non‑academic path and her close bond with an older sister. Both speakers compare their families' educational backgrounds, critiquing the value of formal credentials and recounting B. Lynn's brief experiences with jail, her belief that faith and family protect her. They mock the credibility of a self‑styled "Dr. Cheyenne Bryan," debate the importance of real‑world experience versus degrees, and joke about trademarking titles. The conversation shifts to social media habits, including TikTok rabbit holes, miniature cooking videos, and the impact of blocking features on relationships. They explore dating dynamics, break‑up communication, trauma bonding, and personal relationship criteria (wealth, height, personality). B. Lynn reveals aspirations to act, collaborate with other creators, and expand her YouTube presence, while both hosts riff on sponsorships, cryptocurrency, and future content ideas. The tone remains informal, profanity‑laden, and humor‑driven throughout.
Chapters
I got a lot of homeboys and shit, 'cause they know like, "Girl, you better start checking them DMs, my Austin." It ain't like just sex is just on my mind all the time, so it's easy for me. I'm okay with finding my soulmate, but for me, I just be feeling like it's just a piece of paper.
That's it? You don't lie either way?
No.
Are you a good liar?
Yeah. I mean, friendships like that don't last. It only lasts while you with the dude you with. When that's over, friendship's over. Goddamn it. That's why you don't ask ChatGPT next time you text me. They ain't got nothing to lose, baby. They ain't got nothing to lose, literally. They ain't losing weight. You think they scared of losing you? Sometimes maybe I be remembering without remembering, if that makes sense. You come up here with a miniature meatloaf and a miniature mac and cheese? Oh, bitch, you better call the police on me.
This is Talk Less. Talk less, do more. Like, that's my real hair.
No, stay alone.
I look like a rat without hair. I don't think you understand. I've been faking it. You can go ahead. Oh, oh yeah, okay.
She said, I don't want nobody to know I got extensions, baby.
Oh, we've been filming, right? Come on, come on now. This is my first time working with Kord, so you know, this is the first of everything.
Oh, he fine, he good.
Yeah, I heard a lot of good things, so I was like, you know what? Talk less, do more.
You want that on there?
Uh, said yeah. Okay, talk less, do more show. No, talk less show. Do it again. What, talk less show? Okay, all right. You talk less show, B-Lin, scene 1, take 1. I don't think we're gonna have more than one scene.
That's what I was like. I said, damn, when y'all start doing scenes? I don't know how many scenes we finna do.
Goddamn, you're an actress, you should know. I don't know shit about that.
I was saying I was wondering when we gonna get done because in my head I'm like, damn, I'm just like Spike Lee, how about some scene one?
Okay, I think we got inspired by you 'cause we just saw the trailer and we're like, damn, she's a real actress. She's gonna be on Netflix. Where are you gonna be? But hey, we were like, you know what? Got to see it.
Default's finna take me serious this year. I mean, all that laughing shit, it's time to stop all that laughing. It's time to—
Wait, you trying to be serious now?
Right, talking about right now?
Yeah.
Like sitting right here?
This is not the place to be serious.
No, no, no. I'm talking about in my career. Oh. Hell no, girl. I can only be serious doing that type of work. Once them cameras go off, girl, I'm never really serious.
Yeah, that caught my attention. It was like that phone call, like it was the tension, it was like the heartbeat. I'm like, goddamn, this is her.
I did my thing. Wow.
How'd you get into that? How did that even happen?
Um, it's a guy, shout out to Marcus January, and he is so dope. As you can see, he's a filmmaker. He's the writer, the editor, and he hit me up and was like, I got a project. Now I've been sweating to work with him because he's like so dope in Birmingham, and I be all in because baby, I be in DMs when I want to work with somebody, being in the DMs. And we did a project last October and he hit me up and was like, hey, I got something for you. And I was like, baby, I don't care what it is, let's do it. So we got on it and it was just Amazing. And shout out to him because I love when people give me an opportunity to be able to be serious and trust me with those type of roles. Because not too many people take me serious, which that's not they fault because I don't put myself out there enough to say, hey, I can do these type of roles, or showing my range enough. So that's how I got into that. And I pray he better keep calling me. We got to do some more projects.
Yeah, whatever is his name.
Marcus January.
Marcus, whatever is your last name.
January.
January.
He gonna call me though.
He gonna call you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is he your friend?
Um, well, now yes, but I met essentially because I was a big fan of his work and how he started off. He started out shooting like horror movies with his iPhone. So the work that he's doing now, like with his iPhone, it was like when I found out he was doing it with iPhone, I was like What the hell? And I just been a fan of his ever since. And that was literally like years ago. That was just—
wait, what iPhone was that? Because that matters.
Like, I don't even know. I just knew it was a phone.
That's crazy.
Yeah, it was. He's very dope. So ever since then, I've been blowing that line up. And his wife is an actress. She's very dope. And we're supposed to be doing some things together, so I'm excited about that because I wanted to work with both of them. They're like a a great team, so I'm excited.
Damn, that's fire.
Very.
Okay, I'm glad that, you know, and I think we need to tell people, this is the first episode in our own studio.
Okay.
The first one. We built this in 2 weeks.
And this looks so good.
Yes, it was, shout out to Xavier. He is the set designer behind it. He's the artist behind it. He just DM'd me because like, see, I don't be in DMs. I don't be in people's DMs. I don't even read DMs sometimes, but I don't know what possessed me. I decided to read DMs on my show page and then he reached out and I looked at some of his stuff and I was like, you know what? And it kind of happened that like Kord reached out and like we kind of started thinking about working together and then he reached out and I'm just like, you know what? Only took one phone call, one phone call. And then I get a message with this design and like, I'm going to show you the mockup. It's literally the same thing.
It was meant for you to answer them DMs. Girl, you better start checking them DMs, my Austin.
Girl, there's such madness going on in those DMs. I can't do it. It's insane.
It's madness in there, but it be some, you know, it be some good stuff to wean it out sometimes. You just got to breeze past all the bullshit.
There's a lot of bullshit. But even like, you know, I just feel like being in this industry is not easy as a woman.
Hell no.
Because they just try to fuck you all the time. And I'm like, I don't even know where to go at this point. It's like, even if they're your friends, they're still going to try to fuck you.
Yeah, so I'm like, damn, at this point it's a lot of fucking going on. It's a lot of fuckeration. And I say that all the time, all the time. But it's cool because after so long, I feel like it gets a little better because once people can tell like who you are and they know that you ain't going— shit, I got a lot of homeboys and shit because they know, like, you know what I'm saying? I feel like sometimes they— it get— it get past it. Oh yeah, people know who they can try to fuck on and who they can't. They gonna try, but once they be around you enough, they gonna be like, oh yeah, she ain't going, let me not even go there with it.
So yeah, it's like anybody and everybody at this point. I'm like, damn, I did not ask for that. I've asked for opportunities but not to be fucked every single time. Like, this is crazy.
They said them opportunities coming with something, baby. I just ain't gonna get it then.
Are you single?
Yes, I am single. I am abstinent. It is 9 months. Yes.
What?
Yes, in August. Yeah, I think— yeah, I was gonna make a year. I don't know if I'm calculating it right, but August will make a year and I have not been dating. Whoa, it's too much. It's just too much. Why?
What happened? Who hurt you? What's his name?
Oh, it ain't, it ain't about who hurt me. It's just I want to be focused. And I'm doing like a lot of inner work and working on myself. And a lot of people don't be realizing, like when you out here having sex and stuff, like you taking on other people energies and now you dealing with whatever they dealing with, you know what I'm saying? So I don't know. And for me, it's just out of sight, out of mind. I'm not— it's out of sight, out of mind.
So what you've been doing, just working?
Yeah. Oh, laying around, watching TV, working, being with my family. It ain't like just sex is just on my mind all the time. So it's easy for me. It ain't like, oh, I'm bored, I want to fuck.
No, I've never been like that. I've never been like, oh, I'm bored, I want to fuck. I'm bored, like, I want to go, like, do something. I definitely don't think about fucking. Yeah, I've done 7 months.
You went 7 months? Oh, that's good. I think I went around that time around COVID. I think before COVID hit, I went for about 6 or 7 months, and COVID hit. And while I'm talking, I got bored in the house and fucked. So I just said it ain't like I be like, I'm bored and I'm fucking. Let me take that back. I did that around COVID. I did.
But what you trying to do? What are you looking for?
Somebody, as far as what?
As far as like you want to get married? You just want to?
Nope. And people probably gonna chew me out. I'm the type, I don't want to get married. Never. I'm okay with finding my soulmate, but for me, I just be feeling like it's just a piece of paper. And then once I get tired of you, I gotta go downhill, go to the courthouse. I do this and do paper. No, when I'm ready to go, I'm ready to go. I don't want to sign no papers. And I know some people like, you know, you saying that until that person is on the deathbed and da da da and a will. And people can write you a will without being married, right?
Can they? Yeah, you can. Okay.
You don't need no freaking ring.
You can put anybody as a beneficiary.
Yeah.
Like, you can literally put anybody.
Okay, so there we go. I don't— I, I just don't— I don't care to get married. And it has been a problem.
So what's the abstinence for? Just because the energy?
Just because I want to. Just, I'm just focused. I just don't see no need to fuck, or do I? I don't care to right now.
Oh, I know some men are gonna hate that. Oh my God, this is so stupid. I don't think men understand the whole point.
But also, I'm not dating too, you know what I'm saying? I can see if I was dating and then they got something to say, or I'm not even dating. I'm not dating at all. I haven't dated since June.
I think I have a guy for you in mind.
No, I'm good.
Oh shit, because you know the person who told me about you, Tremo, he said he's been like in his own shell for 12 months too, but he's been trying to gain weight.
Yes, and he has.
He has.
I know that ain't who you talking about you got for me.
I thought for a second, I was like, maybe.
No, that's like, that's like a brother. Like, we're really close. Like, I'm one of them girls that got a lot of homeboys.
Me too. I used to until like a couple months ago, I started figuring out that they just want to fuck.
Oh, see, my homeboys don't want to fuck me. If they do, I can't tell you. Once they get around me and they know I'm a nigga like them, they not— they don't— they're not gonna try to.
No, I mean, I thought that— that— because I'll be telling them about other men and all that shit, and then still it goes over their head and still, still going at it.
Yeah, they not your friend. They just act like to be you.
Yeah, I just lost a lot of friends again just trying to get some coochie. It's fucking ridiculous. Like I don't understand.
It ain't for you to understand sometimes.
Well, you know, we have a little quote behind me.
Oh, tell the truth or lie better. Did you want me to read that?
I want you to say, when was the last time you lied?
Whenever the last time I was talking to a nigga.
So what, 7 months ago?
I guess.
That's it? You don't lie otherwise?
No.
Are you a good liar?
Yeah, especially when I get into that little acting.
Okay, okay.
I say, "And scene," and then I just get the line.
And what do you tell them? What do you lie about?
To niggas? Mm-hmm.
Oh, she gotta think about that. Okay, girl.
I got a bad memory, so I don't know.
Come on, girl.
I mean, it can be something lying about if I was cheating, which I'm not. I ain't gonna say I'm a cheater. I don't cheat. I cheat back. So let's— I'm a cheat backtarian. I'm a cheat bacterian. And, um, but something like that.
Cheat bacterian. So you— but like, are you guys in a relationship, or how does that work?
Or like you just talking and then you find out he's in a relationship with any nigga I had sex with.
Okay.
I'm one of them. I'm just playing. I know, I'm just playing.
Listen, I had a conversation with somebody who literally said that word for word and I was like, okay, explain because I don't believe it, but okay.
Yeah, no, I'm lying about that. I can't remember. It can be simple shit. You know, nigga call you, why you ain't answer your phone? I was with my mama. Or I get my mama to lie for me too. I love my mama.
And your mom and your aunt has done a lot of work with you too, right?
Yes, they have.
How did you make them do that?
Girl, now my auntie, I didn't have to make her do anything. My mama, she wasn't going for it, but my mama started end up eventually liking it, um, especially when she seen like the benefits and stuff like that. But my mom has never been like a camera person. She ain't gonna want to take no pictures. She don't like to do all that, but eventually my mom didn't like to do it, but my mom did it on account of me because my mom is a— she supports me and that just became— that was just her character. And people, people love my mom, baby. They love my mom more than they love me.
People love the dynamic between daughters and mothers. I don't know what it is. It's like I have this Russian content creator. She is going viral because of her relationship with her daughter. And it's like always just like real life stuff where you yell at each other, where a daughter, she's 13 or 14 years old, asking for Dior shoes and, you know, Chanel bags and all of that. And she's like, go get a job.
Hell yeah.
And she's like, I don't think you understand what it takes to earn a Chanel bag or Dior shoes or anything of a kind. And she's like, abundance mindset, mom.
Abundance.
Abundance mindset.
We couldn't say that to our mamas back in the day, baby. We'll get cussed out for something like that. They'll say that's talking back and being smart. You know, nah, nah, nah, we don't do that over there. But no, it's my— I love my mom, and I think people love those relationships because, I mean, it's relatable. Or for some people, they may have had that with their mom. And for me, people would say all the time how our relationship reminded them of their mom, or some— for some people, I wish I had that relationship, you know what I'm saying?
But yeah. But how's it off camera? Is it the same way?
Heck yeah! Yes, yes. My mom, she has no filter. My auntie too. Um, they just keep it real at all times, and they are— they funny as hell. They, they are real funny, and they be having my back too. Like, they be having my back. I love it. They support me in anything that I do. So off camera, it's probably 10 times worse than what they see on, on what they be laughing at on camera. Why?
They don't want to get canceled?
No, no, I'm saying On camera they're funny, off camera is 10 times more funnier.
But why don't they be that on camera? Is it because they think that there's something to say?
They still is. Oh yeah, no, it's certain shit they know they can't say on camera. Oh baby, uh-uh. They wouldn't never get canceled, but you know.
Because you know how people be now, like everything is so sensitive. Girl, it's crazy. Anything and everything can be censored these days. It's like you can't even I don't even know, sometimes you can't even spell certain words and it's like, bro, what the hell? Like, how are we going to live?
You can't spell certain words?
Like, you know, when you post titles and stuff, like you can't put certain words and stuff. Like, you have to, you have to allude to what it means, you know? Like, you, you have to hide the rest of the words so it's censored. Yeah, cuz otherwise it's just—
it'd be some bullshit. It's like you have to study what we can and what we can't damn say. I don't, I don't be knowing.
I— but in comedy though, it's different. Have you done stand-up comedy and like all that, or no?
I did it a few times and then I stopped. I actually was doing it with Cora and Alton. They were helping me, and then I started and then I stopped, and I'm scared to get back on stage. Why?
Talk to me about that. Why?
Because it's already scary getting on stage, right? And then I, I end up getting past that part, and then I stopped, and then now it's like starting back over, and it's like, oh, I'm scared to get back on stage. But I think I'ma try it again because people have been emailing me about doing shows.
So what did you talk about?
Uh, I was talking about how I used to be toxic.
Um, why Court is laughing. See, he said it was funny. Okay, I want to know what was in the stand-up.
Um, I talked about I was in a relationship with this dude, and I think it was one time he wasn't answering his phone, so I pulled up at his mama house and I hit his car 7 times with my car. Like, put it in— what was it— put it in drive, hit it, put it in reverse, go back, go front. Baby, Aaliyah ain't had nothing on me when she said back, forth, back and forth. Baby, I was going back and forth and just tearing it up, like But that's also why I'm not in a relationship no more, because I'm doing the inner work on myself. I don't want to be toxic.
You needed some healing. That's illegal toxic.
That's what it's called. I'm healing.
Okay. Yeah. Okay. That I approve.
I've been doing my self-reflection. That's what they be saying.
Okay, hold up. But like, does not that— you are hurting your own self because now your insurance got to pay for this shit.
No, it's just— no, no, no. You ain't never did it before, baby. It's a certain way you do it. Certain way how you do stuff so you don't mess up your car. It do sit. And his neighbor went there and told him that his mama come out there saying stuff. Baby, I don't care about none of that.
Wait, how do you do it? I want to know. Like, there's a certain angle you got to hit the car so it doesn't hurt your car?
I was lying about that, girl. I just go in and do it. I freestyle my shit. It ain't— I don't have no structure. I'm not strategic. I freestyle. Because if you try to be strategic and have some structure and think about it, you're gonna think yourself out of it. Nah, I don't want to do that because his mom is right there. Baby, I'm gonna put on the show for you and your mama. And this neighbor went and told That girl out there, he in your car.
Is what kind of car was he driving?
Girl, I don't know, shit. The car that got hit, that's what kind. The kind of guy here, and his neighbor want to come over there and tell you, coming over and tell, but you have a girl coming up your— to your door every day, a different girl.
A different girl?
Yeah, that man was having one. His girlfriend didn't play. His girlfriend used to tear his ass up outside them apartments. So it was like in the hood, while the mess go down, you know who cheating on who. You don't know the people name, you don't know them, but you know they business. Since you want to go tell and hop in mine, wait till your girl come back over here because I'm going to tell her. And I mean, her going to be friends and we're going to come over here and we just finna ride over here together. We hit your car, we hit his car, we hit his car, we hit your car, and we rotate it. Now we're texting, we friends.
You still friends?
Uh, not no more, because I mean, friendships like that don't last. It only lasts while you with the dude you with. When that's over, friendship over.
Girl, I had the same thing. Like, I had— when a man was cheating on me and I found out, and like, but we just did— we went to his house and then we just slashed his tires. He wasn't really like— no cars.
And your friend went with you?
Well, no, the girl that he was dating, the second girl, she kind of looked like me.
Y'all went together?
Fuck you.
That's how it's supposed to be. These women be out here trying to fight over these men when y'all need to be teaming up.
No, we teamed up. We went to his house and he told us 'Come back. I'm working right now.' I recorded everything. I was like 22 at the time. I recorded everything on GoPro because at the time we didn't have Osmo or none of that.
You didn't record, my dang, I should have recorded, man.
Listen, I asked my friends for a GoPro and I recorded it. It was hilarious because his face was just like, 'Okay.' And then, and at that point I think it hit him like, this girl, she's not just a Russian girl, like she's actually crazy.
You had the GoPro that be sticking to you, you had it on your head, on your head, on your chest?
I had it in my hand because it had a little tripod, so I put it in my purse so you could see it. And then, um, and then we came back because he was like, come back, I'm working. So we came back and we got a drink, and then we came back and we had a conversation with him. And then she was like, fuck it, I'm so mad. I was like, well, let's go.
That's why you got into podcasting, because y'all had a show with that nigga. Y'all sitting down having a podcast show with the nigga. The man that told y'all to come back, I'm working. Y'all left and came back at his command. You're supposed to stay.
I'm, I'm submissive sometimes. I listen when I have to.
You still listening to the man after he cheated on you, and you with the girl he cheated on you, and you still listening?
I mean, at that point, it was just like, it was just like you had to make a point, you know? Like, it was like, because I'm so petty, and I'm like, I just want to know. Like, I really wanted to know the time management skills behind it, because it wasn't just two of us, it was more. We were all like on the phone though, four of us, like we were on the phone.
Oh, y'all had a Zoom meeting before? It was a Zoom meeting before the podcast show.
Before Zoom was Zoom and podcasts before all of this Clubhouse and all that.
Lord have mercy. These people had conference meetings. Lord have mercy. It wouldn't have went down like that over there with me. Come back, come back, I'm working. I'm going to work this knife in them motherfuckers' ass. Damn, you tell me that's not working.
I mean, I think after that, I kind of come down to the point where now if I call, like I just broke up with somebody. And we weren't even together. It's just like the man—
wait, whoa, whoa. I love this. I love this type of crazy shit. I just broke up with somebody, we weren't even really together. That didn't sound crazy to me at all. No, but you know how it be.
That's how it be. It's so— I think it was like we were more friends than like— we were friends at first, and then it kind of turned into like us fucking, all that. And I have a rule when I fuck with somebody, like, first of all, I only fuck with one person, right? Like, that's just something because it's my health and it's my energy. Like you said, I'm very specific about that. Now, the issue was that before, this man was on my line. Like, we were on the phone, we were, like, connecting, because it's like, okay, we don't have to be in a relationship, but we can connect, talk to each other, because, like, I can't just be fucking somebody to fuck. Like, talk to me, you know?
You gotta connect, fo. Connect the dots.
Like, connect the dots, like, because we were friends before anything, so, like, don't switch up on me like that. And then one weekend, don't hear from him. Then I told him, I said, listen, this is a problem for me when I don't talk to you for 2, 3 days. And he's like, well, it was only one day. Fuck it, whatever, whatever time. Still, you didn't talk to me, didn't text me. You don't respond when I call. Like, I don't like that. Okay, second time, same shit. Now it's 3 days. I'm like, listen, this is affecting me. The men didn't hear what I said.
They love not to hear.
And then I said, just deal with it. I said, you know what? Oh yeah. I said, that's fine. So the third time, like, it's been like last weekend. It was like, it's been like 4 or 5 days. Mind you, I was sick at the same time too. So like, I was sick. The person just texted, DM me, you good? And that was it. No response, no nothing. And in my mind, I'm like, I just felt like, goddamn, so I'm just a buddy to fuck on? Like, all of that friendship, everything goes out of the door now because you were so-called busy. Before you were busy, you were still on my fucking line. Like, you were still calling me for 3, 4 hours. Like, we were like connecting. And so actually, when we finished the studio yesterday, I was sitting right on that motherfucking chair.
See?
And I called him. Well, no, he called me. I said, I'll, I'll call you back. And then, um, after that I called him back. I pulled up ChatGPT because I have a hard time speaking my truth. I have a hard time communicating things because I'm so nice now.
Yeah.
And I pulled up my ChatGPT. I had the whole, like, points of what I need to say. Um, I didn't say the way that I wanted to say, but I got my points across. I was like, just, just say it out loud now and just end the shit. Because, like, you—
did you throw some curse words in there?
I just said I'm just a body to fuck on. That's the only thing I said. But when I deal with people, when I like kind of end things, I was like this quiet. I was like, you know what? I think it's better if we stay friends. I'm not ready to do what you want to do. And it's really fucking with my head. So, okay, I ain't about— he said, I ain't trying to do all that. I'ma just let you go. I said, okay. He said, okay. I hung up the phone and did not—
Did you say fuck you and your ragged-ass mama, bitch? Nope, not say that. God damn it. That's why you don't ask ChatGPT. Next time you text me and I'ma give you what you need to say. Because see, chat want you to— they want you to recite a poetry, Shakespeare and all that shit to end with a man. Call me because you need to talk about his mama. You need to talk about his grandma now. Oh, you go out with a bang. Y'all, y'all made peace. And shit.
Yes, he was. I think what was hurtful was that he's like, I ain't trying to do all that.
Cool.
And then he's like, I'mma just let you be. I'mma just go. I said, okay.
Oh, if a man ever— one dude told me one time, I'mma just let you go. I went, I go right down there to that jail and they locked me up when I got done doing what I had to do. You don't just ever let me go.
You don't let me go. What do you mean you went to the jail?
And you gonna let me go? Don't tell me that you— I'mma just let you go. Oh baby, that's when I go out with a bang. That's what I did.
But what if you like make up later?
We always make up later. Me and the dude made up after I hit his car in front of his mama. Niggas don't be caring about that. We gonna make up.
I think we're done. I don't think—
I know y'all is. If a man say I'm just let you go, I'm telling you right now, you— he gone.
Yeah, no, I'm sorry to tell it to you like that.
It's all right, it's more, it's more. You ain't missing out on nothing.
No, no, no. I, the only thing I'm fine.
What's your type? Fine niggas or medium ugly?
That was medium ugly.
He was mediocre. That's your type?
You know, I think my type is, no, my type is, you know, tall athletes, kind of like basketball players. But I deviated from my type for the first time in a bit.
Like I did.
At this point, I just need to try a fat guy and that's it.
Oh, them fat motherfuckers is some bitches too.
Really?
Oh girl, I done talked to fat, skinny, tall, short motherfuckers shaped like rectangles, octagons, all them motherfuckers. Girl, tell me I'mma talk to somebody fat. You don't want to do that. Why? Go talk to Dwayne and see what happened. You want me to let you see for yourself?
I mean, I feel like they're going to love me because they probably, they probably like, there's no way she's talking to me.
That's the same thing I thought. That's the same thing I thought. They do you more dirt than the skinny motherfuckers. The motherfuckers in shape. Yeah, they ain't got nothing to lose, baby. They ain't got nothing to lose. Literally, they ain't losing weight. You think they scared of losing you? You done lost your mind.
Oh boy, fuck, I tried.
It's some good dudes out here though, real talk. It's some good ones out here. I don't know where they at, but they out here.
For real. I don't know. I listen, I'm going back to the fact that it's me. I'm the problem. I'm the problem. I mean, it is what it is.
Who's responsible? What you think about me? What you be doing?
I just see like, I don't communicate things when the time is right. Like, see, I need to be very much like, fuck you and fuck your mama too.
Oh, they still fuck you over even when you say fuck your mama. They don't, that ain't. So outside of communicating, what you think?
Like, if things are not, if I don't like something, if I'm in person, over the phone I can say things because it's like there's a, you know, there's a phone. But if I'm in person with them, I'm gonna just be like, and I just start laughing and I'm just like, fuck, you know, it's fine. And then I go home and I'm like, fuck. And it's just like, I sit there like, goddamn.
She never did this.
She would have never did this. She would have said it, whatever, whatever I felt like. And then I'm just like, oh, I'm gonna just say it on the podcast. Fuck it. She don't watch it anyways.
True. True. My problem is I'm not— and a lot of guys have expressed this— I'm not affectionate enough. Oh girl, I just don't see the I've gotten less and less affectionate.
Um, I just be like, um, if I can get under a man's skin, I would. I am like, I will be all up in your fucking face if it's just us together. This— you will not— like, I will have to touch you at all times. If we're sleeping in the same bed, I will have to touch you at all motherfucking times. I don't care if you get hot or not, you have to— like, something has to be on my body, or my body has to be on your body.
See, then men start getting suffocated, and then now, now, now they gonna be like, for how long?
The last one, it was all night long. Never, it was like literally for 24 hours. I'm not even joking, like literally.
I'm saying how long y'all was talking? Oh, I'm saying like throughout the whole process, how long did they like it?
The talking, I mean, it was a couple months. It's been, it's been going on for a while, but, but just the, yeah, that was the first one, because usually I'd be like, okay, now I'm hot, now I'm over it.
You'll get it, okay.
But we're like, also, I don't really like to sleep with men because it's like I don't get enough sleep. So it's like, yeah, you know, especially when you have shit to do. And I, you know, sometimes I got to go play tennis or I got to get up in the morning, got to go to the gym. And it's kind of like this threw me off my routine a little bit. Yeah.
You know, you sleep with somebody and it's like, ooh, it throws you off your routine.
It does. Not in that way, though.
Oh, wait, what do you mean?
But in a B.B. way, you know, that routine was great. But the routine of like working out and doing all that.
Yeah, I'm saying sometimes it— that's what I'm saying, throwing you off your routine when you get with somebody and you like them. Then sometimes you have to snap back into them like, bitch, get on your shit. That's what you're talking about?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Yeah, that's why I'm like, fuck it, I'm just gonna go back. I would love to date, but I'm just like, nah, nah, I'ma just get back to work.
Yeah, girl, you got a lot going on and you the shit. Fuck them lame-ass dudes.
That's what I said.
I'm like, I'm him. You good. You ain't calling me. Don't worry about it. You ain't got to be on my line. Don't worry about it.
That's what I said too. And then I was like, oh, here we go again. And I'm like, I don't know. I literally— this is my favorite thing to say. I say, I'm not a parrot. I'm a human. Because you know what parrots do? They just repeat themselves every goddamn time. I said once, I said twice. Third time is a charm. It is what it is. I don't spin the block. So if you want to spin the block, Go ahead, keep trying. I ain't going back. Once I made a decision, I made a decision. I'm moving forward.
Yeah.
It is what it is.
It's they loss.
Fuck them.
You ain't gonna see me, but you gonna see me because you gonna see me all down your timeline. I ain't got to see you, but bitch, you gonna see me. For real.
All right, let's do the introduction.
Introduction?
I'm gonna introduce you to the show.
Oh, you do that in the last part of the show, don't you?
I stopped doing it in the beginning. Okay, because we're gonna give you flowers. Oh, you like?
Okay.
All right, you guys, well, welcome back to Talk Less Show, where conversations go deeper than the surface. And we are in a new studio, and this is where you're gonna see us from now on. So it's gonna be a full new look, and, um, I hope that you're gonna enjoy this. So today I'm joined by an actress, by a comedian, and a creator, Belen, somebody who's been building a massive audience online through her hilarious and painfully accurate life life skills, real life skits that people genuinely see themselves in. From relationships and dating to friendships, social media behavior, and everyday situations that make you sit there like, yeah, people really do act like this. She's created a lane where comedy feels real, relatable, chaotic, and honestly a little too accurate sometimes. What makes her stand out is the way that she turns real human behavior into entertainment. Whether she's calling out delusion, exposing double standards, or playing a character, as we all unfortunately know in real life, Her content sparks conversations because there's truth behind the comedy. Dealin, welcome to Talk Less Show.
Oh, girl, I ain't never had no introduction like that. Who the hell wrote that?
Me and ChatGPT. Listen, me and Chat, we have a very intimate conversations. And every time Chat gives me some bullshit, I say, you know what? Go back and give me something good.
I love that.
Because I ain't paying $20 for nothing, okay?
Hey, I know that's right.
And I usually go in, like, I go into every single AI platform. Like, I go into Claude, I go into Manus. I'm just a heavy user of AI.
I love ChatGPT. I love ChatGPT. I love that introduction. I'm glad. I love that. I love that.
Because that's how I see you. So I want to, you know, sometimes I can't really say it out loud myself, but I can put it. That's why you see I have to write it in chat.
Yeah.
This is what I give men. Okay. And they don't appreciate that.
I appreciate my ass.
Well, you're welcome. Well, every guest that comes on Talk Less Show, they always answer this one question. If there's one thing you can talk less about, what would it be?
If it was one thing I could talk less about, maybe do more of, talk less about and do more of. What you mean talk less about?
Like, you know, sometimes you keep talking about starting therapy or like getting back in shape, going back to the gym and like actually do it.
You know, you just said that. Now I'mma be talk less about and do more therapy for sure, because I knew I need therapy. And you don't have to give too much. I think, yeah, I think that would be it.
Why?
Because I don't know what it is. I've been saying for years I need to go to therapy. Um, I have a lot of childhood trauma that I need to heal. Um, it's something— I don't even know— something that happened and affected me when I was a child, and it blocked all of my memories. So I don't remember, uh, much of my childhood. I probably can count on my hands of how many things I can probably remember. Um, and when people be like, oh, I was at this age, or I was 7 and 8 and 9 and 10, I'd be like, like, if you're around me, I tell mostly the same stories when I was a child because that's all I remember. Um, so I'm like, I do want to get therapy. And I've heard of this before. I think my sister was the one that told me that trauma can block out the bad memories but also affect your good memories as well. So I do want to go to therapy to heal, and I don't know if I necessarily want to say I want to remember what it was that happened to me, but I guess if that would make me remember my good memories I guess I'll probably be okay with that so I can, you know, try to heal that part. Like, it'd be so messed up because my son, he's 12 years old, and he'll always ask me like, well, Mom, when you were my age, or Mom, da da da, what did you do? And I have to always be like, I don't remember. Like, so, and why I haven't went yet, I don't know. I don't know if I'm scared. I don't know. Well, maybe it's just a procrastination thing. I don't know.
You have to be ready for therapy. I just, I literally, I think everything that just transpired in my life happened because I literally just got back into therapy 2 weeks ago.
Mm-hmm.
And the therapy that I think, like the one that you were talking about, um, so I've been doing all kinds of different therapies for the last 5, 6 years. I've tried like literally just so many different kinds just because I got very depressed during COVID and like depressed, but like suicidal depressed. Mm-hmm. And so like anxiety was something that I didn't even know what anxiety was up until it 25 years old, cuz to me it was a normal state of being. So like, that's why for me it's very hard to date. Like, I get so anxious sometimes cuz it's like, oh, what is this person doing? Like, why are they not picking up the phone? And it's like, I have to— that's why I always tell people, listen, when you date me, that's why you have to communicate with me. It's not because I'm crazy or needy. You literally just send one text message, I'm fine with it. Like, I'm not asking for you to be on the phone with me. It's just because I'm an anxious person, and so I don't want to worry about nothing if it's nothing. Like, if it is, if it's all good, then it's all good. Just give me a sign that, hey, we're good, everything is fine, keep it moving. But, um, something that I've done for that was, uh, hypnotherapy. So like, they literally hypnotize you, but it's like, it's not like you're just like in some weird state of mind or you're drugged out. No, it's just basically they put you in this trance state of mind where your conscious kind of like, it's, it's kind of like you kind of like shut off all of the thoughts and like memories And then like once you're in that trance state of mind, you kind of focus on specific things that you want to go into, and whatever comes to mind comes to mind. Like it might be true, it might be false, but it might be something that's like just going to transpire. It might be like an image of something, but it's such a beautiful thing because it's like when I did hypnotherapy, I did it twice in my life, um, it was like a 3-hour long session, and I just saw myself from a different angle that I was like, oh my God, like I had no idea. It was just such a beautiful experience because I think like I didn't understand the power that I had or like the just the, the— I didn't really realize who I was up until quite just like maybe, you know, a year or two ago. I had no idea because I always thought that like, oh, life is meant to be, you know, you have a corporate job, you pay your taxes, like, you know, you just like get married, you have kids. Like it's just the old cookie cutter approach that everybody's living. And when I started doing that, I was like, Oh my God, there's so many other things that you can do. There's so many things that you can get into. Like you have— I always thought that I was not creative. I thought that I was bad at marketing. And then when I started like exploring more different kinds of therapy, like it really started guiding me towards, I mean, this.
That's crazy because honestly, I didn't even know it was different kinds of therapy. I'm just thinking it's just therapy. You go and you talk. So you just really taught me something. And I need to look into the different types.
And I will tell you something too. This is— and people can argue with me, but I believe that you need to find a therapist who comes from a very similar background as you.
I've heard that before.
So I— my therapist is Russian. She's literally— she lives in Russia. She— the first thing that she told me, this new one that she works with my mom too. And she told me, she said, you got to understand because you were born and raised in Russia and then your conscious upbringing happened in America. So you have a Western mindset, but you also have just traditions and customs and things that were instilled in you as a baby that comes from the Russian culture. So now you're clashing cultures and that's where, you know, you kind of get lost sometimes because you try to act as if, but you're not because you're not in the right environment for that. And so it's important to go back to your roots. So like I would say, you know, whatever your roots are, you know, whatever it can be. Obviously, like, I would find, like, a Black woman that could be, you know, somebody who can, like, guide you through the therapy process. Mm.
Thank you for that, because I did not know that. You just really put me on.
Mm-hmm. It's something like— but I had to learn that throughout experiences. And sometimes, you know, sometimes, like, my therapist that I had for a while, she was amazing, but I felt like she started really liking me. And we had to part ways.
Liking you, liking you?
Not in the sexual way, but as a human being. And so a lot of times there are certain things that I would just be doing shit just to do shit, you know? And I would get in relationships that were not serving me. I like, I literally ended up in an open relationship and she was like, we'll try it out. You know, it's kind of like this, like very like a modern approach to like be open-minded to this experience. And I said, no, that shit fucked me up.
I can't. The open relationship.
The open relationship. Yeah.
I can—
no, I'm like, I know he has a bitch in his house right now. Like, this is not okay. I don't need to know those things. Like, this is just— and mind you, it was somebody who was also like a good friend of mine and just everything. Like, I, I'd be doing this shit again and again, you see, turning friends into people who I fuck with.
Mhm. You just put me on though. When I leave and I go home, I'm definitely going to look into the different type of therapies to see what type. But until you find out— found out the right therapy that was for you, you just kept trying, like, different.
It's like dating. It's literally like dating. Until you find the right person, you don't really want to commit to them, because then the right therapist will tell you, I'm not trying to tie you down for 10 sessions. That's not how it works. They're going to tell you, if you don't like my therapy after this session, I don't need to see you again.
Okay, so you will only just literally do one session and then go on to the—
No, you can go back. You can say, hey, I love the therapy session we had, you know, because not always you're going to vibe. Like, I had a therapist that I was just like, it was this white American lady, a good human being. Like, she's a good human being, but she's not a good therapist because every time I would say something, it'd be like, oh no, that's not okay. I am so sorry.
And I'm like, bitch, I don't—
I ain't asking for you sorry. Like, yeah, yeah, what? There's nothing to be sorry about. Like, you know, tell me something. Where do I need to look into? Or what do I need to do? And that's why I started doing a lot of therapy on ChatGPT. But you know how ChatGPT— yeah, he'll be telling you a lot of things that like, oh yeah, um, you have to know your worth, you have to value yourself, just let him go.
And then I get to agreeing with you too much too. ChatGPT get the— yeah, you're absolutely right. Don't tell me I'm right. I'm coming to you so you can— if I know I was right, but you don't want to tell me I'm right because now you finna lead me to a path of destruction that I don't— you tell me I'm right every 5 seconds. No, I'm wrong. You're right. You're right. You are wrong. No, I'm definitely gonna look into that for real though, and when I do, I'm gonna say I got me a therapist, girl. I'm trying this one.
Yeah, you should. You should. I would. But again, I think it's something you have to be ready for. Because for me, it was like, again, my thing is my anxiety started rising again. And it's just like, obviously, I got so much going on. And it's a lot of uncertainty because now I don't have consistent income like I had before. Now it's all up to me and it's scary. It's, you know how it is, you're a content creator too.
Yeah.
So, and bills still got to be paid, you know. Nobody's gonna question that. So like the anxiety started going up and like plus like this whole, you know, whoever I was talking to is just like, oh my man, this shit, I gotta cut all this shit out. Yeah. And just, just learn how to do it in a proper way because—
So, and you say you let the, the people that you know that you're dating that you have anxiety? In those things. So if you, if you upfront with this, what be pissing me off, because you can be upfront with people and let them know like, hey, I deal with this, this is what's going to come with it. Oh yeah, I'm cool with it. Just for them not to be cool with it.
Like, no, he just said I'm crazy. He's like, I didn't know you were crazy. I'm like, I don't see— but that's the thing is it got to the point where what hurt me the most is like it got to the point where It's kind of like I let you into my life. Like, I let you so close to me where, you know, now, you know, like, there's obviously there is something that everybody can see. There is something that I want to show, but there's also some things that I'm not letting the world see because it's just my personal privacy.
Yes. Just because you're on social media and those things, you, you get to choose what you want to show the world and what you don't.
Mm-hmm.
Him talking about you crazy. That's, that's crazy. You crazy. How you all?
I mean, listen, I never said I'm not crazy. I've always said that I'm crazy. Yeah, I am crazy. I know that. Oh, but, but I'm not in that way. Like, not in the way where I'm going to go and, like, slash your tires anymore, you know? Like, I'm just going to— if things don't serve me, I'm just going to keep it moving because—
and that's what you're supposed to do.
Yeah. Like, obviously, you know, you're going to try, you're going to try one way or another way. You kind of like see. But if things are not aligning, then why do you— you can't just knock on the closed door. It's shut.
Yeah, ain't shit here.
Why am I gonna— I see, like, I don't like to just fuck with people just to fuck with people. For what? Yeah, what am I fucking you on for? I don't, you know, I'm not crazy about sex like that. Like, yeah, I love it, but I don't need to have it. And so it's kind of like always, okay, let's have some sort of definitions of what we're doing, because I do want to get married, I do want to have children.
Yeah.
And when people are not on that same vibe, then like, okay, cool, you got to keep it moving.
We're not compatible. We don't want the same thing.
So yeah, I ain't got no bad blood. I'm like, shit, it is what it is. Yeah. But I feel like if we go back to your traumas and comedy, I feel like if you are funny or a comedian, I feel like we all have some sort of traumas that made us this funny.
Yeah.
Because that's what we turn that whole pain into jokes. Mm-hmm. And I don't know why I say we, because I guess I put myself in the comedian.
No, that's all right. Yeah. That's true though, we, we definitely all do. That's, that's no— but I don't know, it'd be crazy too because people will be like— I guess sometimes maybe I'll be remembering without remembering, if that makes sense. Because it's a lot of skits that I've done and people be like, oh, you could tell she was wearing these type people, you could tell. And in my head I'd be like— because like with my auntie character my Aunt Tanya character I do, and people's like, "Oh, you could tell that she be around this and da da da." It's like when I create the character, I just be doing it. It's not like a memory. Well, now sometimes like I will definitely say stuff that my mom would say, but before when that character was created, I didn't have like a, well, I do have an aunt named Aunt Tanya. So when it came to like the appearance with the wig and the gold tooth and the bamboo earrings, I got that from my aunt, one of my aunts. But when it come— like, came down to the personality, I didn't— it was nothing in the back of my mind that was like, oh, this person, this person. So maybe I was subconsciously putting the pieces together, remembering something that I didn't know I was remembering. But it's a lot of times I be wanting to remember certain stuff, like, because I'm like, dang, I can incorporate this too. But I don't know, like I said, maybe that's a subconscious remembrance.
It could be, because like, I think that's what it is. I feel like everything that So when I went to school, there was this concept that I learned. I used to take philosophy classes. I love philosophy. I'm just such a—
What the heck is philosophy?
Philosophy? It's when it's just thinking. It's like the way— it's when people write the rules of life or like they explain how, how, you know, the life is or should be or, you know, there's different types of writings in philosophy and like different concepts like Anything can be a philosophy. Like there is a concept of philosophy, like from German, it's like, it's called nihilism, where they deny anything and everything. Like it's just, it's just different concepts, but they're kind of like deep thinkers and they, they propose their own thoughts on people. Like, I guess, you know, the way you live your life is your own philosophy. That's how you look at it. And so one of the, one of the concepts is like free will, for example, it's a concept in philosophy. And I remember the professor was trying to convince us that there's no free will. And he said there's causal determinism. And causal determinism is when every single event is predetermined by, um, by the previous events. So for example, when you were born, your parents are going to give you apple juice. And so when you grow up, you like drinking apple juice, but it's predetermined by the event because your parents were doing that to you. So now that's what caused you to like certain things.
Okay.
And so like, if you start thinking about it, then like every single thing is predetermined, every single thing that you do. Like I love BLACKPINK. So like it has to come from somewhere. It's not like I just randomly, you know, open up my eyes and I'm like, oh, BLACKPINK. Like it had to come from either I saw it somewhere or, you know, somebody talked to me about it. And all of a sudden that image like stuck in my head. And so that's kind of how you create a lot of things. And so I think that's what's happening with you a lot of times is when you, you know, when you create the skits, because anything, even when we act, right. You know, when I remember when I was taking acting classes, they were teaching you how to cry. You have to think about a sad event.
Yeah.
So it's predetermined. So you can think about those things, things that are going to like hurt you so deep that if you think about it, it's going to make you cry. And so that's how you can act and like act and, you know, get in that mood and all of that. So it's from the same concept.
It's the philosophy.
Everything is philosophy.
Philosophy.
Philosophy.
Phi or pee?
Phi.
Phi.
P-H-Y.
Phi. Philosophy. Oh my God, philosophy of life. I'm going to tell all my friends today, baby, it's the philosophy of it. You not philosophizing what I'm saying. Philosophy. Oh, I'm going to use the hell out that word today.
She's like, I learned so many things.
I didn't learn philosophy.
Philosophy.
Philosophy. Phi. Philosophy. I didn't learn Sparkling water inside of liquor is good. I mean, yeah, yeah, sparkling water inside of liquor is good. And the different type of therapies. Lord have mercy. I ain't know I was going to come on here and talk less and learn more.
That's how we do it. That's what they're telling me. I got to teach people.
I just love learning.
Do you? Were you a good student in school?
Girl! Hell no, barely made it out of school.
Really?
What I did, I stayed in trouble. Like, what kind of trouble, girl? So from Birmingham, Alabama, 205, shout out to y'all. And so I end up, when I went to high school, I went to Huffman. So that was like a city school where it was just like, it was just like an eye-opening for me because it was like hood and ghetto. So you know, I, I didn't skip school, but I was skipping class. I was in the gym. So we're in the gym, the girls, we're getting our hair braided. We— I learned how to play cards. Like, it was just so amazing to me. So my mom ended up taking me out of Huffman because one day she caught up to the school to tell, like, my math teacher, somebody, something like, hey, tell Brittany something about my house key, something like that. And my teacher at the time was like, I don't know what you're talking about. I never seen her before, girl. I hadn't been in that later class for a whole month. My mama rented out our house because my mom owned the house we was in. She rented out our house. We moved to, uh, Pinson, which was more of like a predominantly white school, and went there. Mom was like, okay, you ain't gonna get in no trouble here. Shit, girl, I was still getting in trouble. Like one day I just skipped class, got like some tissue and like TP the whole school. They watch my slow ass on camera. This during school, this ain't like at night when school closed. Doing that, I will open the classroom doors, throw a cup of water in the door, run.
You were just having fun, huh?
So much fun. And end up having to go to summer school because just playing in class. I'm not gonna say I was dumb, but I think back then I probably had like ADHD or something. But you know, your parents don't want to hear that. You ain't gonna take no medicine. We not da da da. And I was raised in church too, so, you know, um, did you pray? Yeah, in church, baby, they praying everything away. We, we ain't medicizing nothing, we gonna pray it away, baby. Them prayers ain't get too far because each time they prayed, I got worse and worse. I was doing so much shit at school, but, um, I had really fun. And I ended up— shout out to my mom because I put mom through so much stuff. They would call my mom And they would be like, she'll just get quiet on the phone. She wouldn't even say nothing no more. They'd be like, Miss Sharad, we know you're on the phone. Like, girl used to stay in trouble, but I had fun. It wasn't like a bad, bad trouble. It was like a fun trouble. Um, went to summer school. My homeboy at the time ended up making me a summer school excuse because they was like, hey, you can't miss no days of summer school. He made me a summer school excuse and he was high. He wrote the name of the hospital wrong on there. I turned it in, got kicked out of high school— I mean, out of summer school. My mama was crying. She was like, please give her another chance. Money gone down the drain. Like, I used to do some crazy shit, but I graduated, and then I went to college.
You did?
Yes, for the financial aid check.
Okay, did you graduate?
Got my check. No, no, no, baby, you're not listening to what I'm saying. I went to college, you know, they give you the financial aid check. So I went to college, and when I got my first check, I was gone. So when people say, what you majored in, what you majored in? Financial accounting and aid, right? Financial aid check. Yeah.
How much you get, girl?
Back then, I can't remember. Maybe it was like $1,000, some $2,000. I can't remember. And my mom was still thinking I was in school. And even when I was going to college, I went to classes sign my name on the paper, and I was in the lunchroom every day. My mom was giving me gas money every day thinking I was going to school. Baby, I only— I was still pocketing her gas money while I had my financial check. It was like money on top of money.
You were working. See, a hustler.
Who? Yes, you were. Yes, I was hustling the schools, hustling my mama.
Did you ever pay her back?
Do I pay her back?
Yeah.
Um, my phone said hell no. Um, Yeah, especially when I got on. But I mean, you can never, you can never pay your, you can never pay back your parents. I just feel like it's all the things that she's ever done for me, I could never pay her back. I can come a billion other day and get her a billion dollars, it still wouldn't be enough for everything that my mom gave me. So I can never pay her back.
No, we love Mama.
I just snapped with that shit. I hope you just heard me. Oh yeah, but no, that's true. Um, Yeah, but I had some fun times growing up. I was never a school person. And see, I have a sister, she's older than me, we're 8 years apart, and we're very close. And me and her were like night and day. She's book smart, she was very smart. And one thing I always loved about my mom, she never pinned us up against each other. She never was like, well, your sister doing this, you need to— my mom accepted me for who I was. Like, I mean, of course I didn't come home with A's and B's like my sister, but I came home with my C's and D's. That was passing. My mom ain't put no pressure on me. I used to tell my mom that the D stand for doing good. But my mom never held me to, like, you know, pin me up against my sister to make me feel like you have to do this. My mama understood that school just wasn't for me, and school is not for everybody. And my mom allowed me to do what I'm doing now. Like, you can't go to school for everything. Like, the things that I'm doing are the things that I'm taught, you know what I'm saying? Which is no shade to nobody that went to school, so I don't want nobody to feel like I'm telling you not to go to school. But for parents out here, I would just commend you. If that's something your child don't want to do, don't make them.
Like, I agree. I don't think, you know, I don't think school is for everybody. Yeah, I think, you know, I went to school. I'm actually the least educated person in my family. I've always said that my family, my mom is a PhD. Yeah, my mom is a PhD. My brother has two master's degrees. My dad has master's degrees. My—
oh, geez.
Both grandparents. But in Russia, it was, you know, in Soviet Union was a very big thing. So, and the education is free. So like, if you don't get education, then you just—
it's free out there.
Yeah, it was free. It's still free. It's, there's government-assisted education. There's also private schools you can go to, up to you. But yeah, it's free. It's been free. And Yeah, that's why it's, you know, when I came here, it was a big deal because my mom said, I'll pay for school. But obviously it was expensive. It's very expensive. But she said, I want to give you the best education that's possible. And obviously it's not compared to what you could have learned there, but also it's opportunities that come with it, right? It's not just school. So when I went to school, but I went to the— I graduated my bachelor degree. I was— I graduated with honors, but my I went to do my MBA and literally they were still talking about Walmart as the biggest retailer. And I'm like, Walmart is the biggest online retailer. It was 2017 or 2018 or something. And I was just like, man, at this point I know more than you know, because the internet now can teach you more than what you're gonna teach me with those books that, you know, you studied throughout the semester. And so it just, I was kind of like, man, like at this point I'm paying all this money for what? So I did one semester of MBA and I just, dropped out because I'm like, this is not doing anything for me. I'm not learning anything. I'm just— just so I can get a piece of paper? I'm like, no job is going to care for that. They don't— they say they care for the piece of paper, but it's not like they're going to give you magically a higher paycheck or, you know, something else.
No. Yeah, I did all that for my school diploma and don't nobody be checking for school diplomas. Y'all can check this school diploma. I should have bought it with me today. I should have made you check it. Y'all made us get— do all this for a school diploma and ain't nobody Say ain't nobody checking for it.
Yeah, I don't even know where— well, I guess no, they're checking the, the Cheyenne Bryan, the Dr. Bryan, they checking her diploma.
Oh, they ain't checking hers. Oh, they checking hers. If it— but they ain't— but y'all don't want to check mine. Somebody finna come check mine. Next interview I do, I'm bringing my diploma. You need to check me for it. They putting that Cheyenne through it, ain't they?
Oh yeah, they are. Listen, they're just asking for the transcripts and everything.
She had it burnt up in the school. I was going to school, soon as I walked out the door, school blew up. She come to all type of shit, girl. I don't blame her. I ain't mad at her though. I'll be telling them same lies. I can't— I ain't mad at him. Hey man, baby, I'll be lying harder than her and I still go on with it. Y'all let the lady sit up here and acting like she a doctor all this time. Just let her keep on acting like it. Did nobody question the lady of credibility? When she was all on Cam Newton and all that. Just let the lady keep on, just let her keep on doing it at this point.
Listen, I agree with you. I think people are so concerned about credentials, but at the end of the day, everybody wants to be an expert. But how do you become an expert? It's not because you study. Yeah, sure. As a doctor, you can study something like, you know, if you operate on people. But we're talking about like, you talking about real life experiences. Experiences. You just have to live, yeah, to be a doctor or to be a therapist. Like, sometimes better therapists are the ones that don't have any degrees, you know, people who actually done like different courses and different things. Like, I'm not saying that— do I agree she needs to call herself a doctor? No, I don't think so.
She said she ain't dropping that doctor, and she said if y'all ask her to drop it one more time, she going to drop y'all asses. That's what she said.
Yeah, I mean, if that's what she wants to do, I don't care. I mean, it's not—
we don't care.
It's—
yeah, right, it's us.
But I don't— I don't gain anything or lose anything by her calling herself doctor. Like, cuz I, I heard she, um, trademarked it.
Trademarked what?
The Dr. Cheyenne— Dr. Bryant. So like nobody else can call themselves, I guess, Dr. Bryant.
Then nobody want to, baby. We ain't trying to call ourselves no damn Dr. Bryant.
I don't know. See, it is what it is.
I, I don't They ain't never got to worry about me putting no doctor in front of my name, baby. DR gonna stand for many things, but it ain't gonna stand for doctor. I put that in my skit. You are gonna stand for the realest.
What would you put it for?
The realest? Because I'm the realest bitch out here. She trademarked it. Lord, I ain't know she did that. She said, I'm one step ahead of y'all.
Yeah, and it's been like years since she's done that. Years, years. I mean, I saw that on TikTok, so I don't even know if it's true or not. You know, sometimes TikTok be dropping whatever TikTok tell me is true.
I don't care if TikTok said it, the bitch went and trademarked her name.
TikTok be like— I be getting lost in TikTok sometimes.
Me too. I be on there all down rabbit holes about the giants, aliens, which I believe in aliens and all. I'm conspiracy theorist. I believe in my But I love going down like rabbit holes and things like that on TikTok. I love TikTok.
I love TikTok. I never, I never was into it until I started doing social media. And so I just kind of started scrolling. You know, one thing that's been pissing me off is those videos where they go, I think I'm about to get engaged. Get ready with me to get engaged.
I'm like, bitch, girl, shut your whispering stupid ass up. That ain't came across my timeline. But you know what videos I love? I love them little miniature videos where they be cooking like them little bitty— oh my God, and they— I bought me some miniatures. I have some miniatures. I think I'm gonna start doing some miniature videos. I don't— I'm just obsessed with miniature videos. They be cooking miniature meatloaves and miniature mac and cheeses and stuff. For real, it was so little.
I started like when she was— it was something like, he pissed me off so I cooked him breakfast. It's like 2 little eggs like this little Like the tiny little ones, the miniature ones.
Who did it?
It's like a bunch of videos that like, oh, he pissed me off and today his breakfast is going to be like two little eggs, like some little crumbs.
I'll tell the hell— I'll tear that miniature food up. I'mma be pissed off after I eat it though. You come up here with a miniature meatloaf and a miniature mac and cheese. Oh bitch, you better call the police on me. I'mma eat it. I'mma eat it first. I'm not saying that I'm not going to eat it cuz I'm I'm gonna eat it. But when I get done swallowing, oh baby, I'm finna go to jail.
See, this is why you keep going to jail, because you keep swallowing.
I went to jail a few times and my mama was right there. I know one time, as soon as I had got out of jail, dude gonna tell my son, let me get your number. Nigga, I just got out of jail. I'm waiting for my mom pull up to come get me and you trying to talk to me. Them niggas love women that just got out of jail, baby. I don't know why.
How was it in there? Huh? How was it in there? How long did you stay in there?
About 5 minutes.
5 minutes? So you just walked in and walked out?
Yep.
They brought you in?
Girl, my mama was not gonna let me sit up in there. Every time I got in trouble, girl, my mama was— my mama was sad. Like, she never, you know, but shit, she right there. She ain't even let me sit up in there.
So, like, do they undress you? Like, do you get—
You not listening to me, baby. I didn't make it that far.
Oh, I didn't know you could even—
No, I never got undressed. I never made— I ain't never made that far. I just like to say jail because that's the first thing somebody thinks, right? Damn, bitch, you did time. How much time you did? 5 minutes. I've been on this podcast longer than I've been in jail. I've been in jail about 20 times. 20 times, probably served about 20 times. I went to jail, probably served a total time of 7 minutes. 7 minutes.
Was it hard?
Oh girl, hard. They knew not to play with me. I went in, I laid it down. I laid it all down. I'm just playing, girl. I ain't even make it to the back. They wasn't gonna send me back there to the back. Every time I turn myself in, I imagine my mama right there with me, because somebody has to.
Like, how does that work? How does she— or she has that much power, baby?
That came from the power of Jesus, because I don't— I don't know. But I ain't went to jail that many times, but the few times I did, I never got that far to take off my clothes. I think I went in one time for like an hour though, and I took a took a little nap, but because all that processing and all that be taking time. Yeah, but by the time I walked back there, my mom was all up there, already up there in the front, the deed to the house and all that.
Well, what was the first conversation she's having with you when you're out of jail?
When I'm out of jail? Um, girl, none. I'm back there telling her all the mess that went on, because when you back there, you just hear all the little stuff that's going on. That's the conversation. Shit, what you gonna say?
Was it because of me crying? Hell no.
Nah, I joke a lot about being toxic, but girl, I ain't never went to jail for no man. It was a little dumb stuff I was doing when I was younger, um, because I was young, um, like 18 or 19.
Okay.
Um, yeah, nothing as I'm older. Um, and then sometimes, you know, warrants for tickets, um, stuff like that. It was Never nothing like— nothing for no dude. Now I might do some crazy stuff, but I ain't gonna go to jail for no— for no dude. Like, I can control myself that much. Like, and I ain't gonna talk to no dude that's gonna call the police on me. No, no, girl. Yeah. Uh, now I'm really done with you. You ain't— you call the police on me, we done. You ain't never got to worry about me. No.
But if there's no police involved, would you spin the block?
I don't spin the block on dudes.
So when you done done, like, but sometimes, you know, when you fight, you say like, oh, I'm done with you.
Oh, like when I'm initially done done, I don't spin the block. But you know, all that back and forth. Yeah, back and forth. Yeah. Yeah.
How long does it last? What? The back and forth. I'm just trying to gauge. Where are we at?
Back and forth. Girl, I done been back and forth with somebody. You know, when you're in a relationship for like a year or two, and we'll probably be doing good for like 4 or 5 months. And then we'll probably not talk for like a day, a day or two, or— but I ain't never like been in a relation with— relationship with somebody and not talk to them for like a month. Like, I'm an out of sight, out of mind type of person. So if I— if you mess around and let me get past 4 or 5 days, I'm good. Like, on the real, I'm good.
Oh, see, and then apparently I said that I'm starting an issue that's not an issue. 5 days. See, this is where I'm saying people, some people know you'd be like, fuck, I forgot about you.
Hold on, what you mean? Who, what they say about your 4, what happened in your 4 or 5 days?
That man, it was 5 days that I didn't talk to him.
Oh yeah, see that, that you post, hey, fuck it. Yeah, it's like I'm who, but everybody, yeah, everybody different though. But for me, out of sight, out of mind, that shit be true.
Yeah, like because if you're not in my life, like shit is keeping moving.
I mean, I don't know what Ply said. What Ply said? Ain't called in 2 days, got to let her mind wander. You won't call me in 2 days, my mind wandered off to 12 other people. Don't worry about it, don't let my mind wander.
Oh yeah, throughout those 5 days, um, I did run into my ex, and then he was like driving this nice little car, and I was like, you know what, I, I just, I want to go for a spit.
Oh, so you, you spins the block?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. We just got in, it was like a nice little car, and I was like, you know what?
And y'all went for a spin.
I got right out of that car and walked right back into my house.
How far did y'all drive? Like around the corner and stuff?
We drove, because we live in like, we're in the same neighborhood.
Oh yeah, I drove around neighborhood.
Yeah, we drove around the neighborhood.
You spent the block. It was some blocks that was spent. That's all I'm saying. Okay, you spent the block around the neighborhood. You You spin the block.
I spin the block, literally though. Yeah, in a nice car.
And figuratively.
And the hair is blowing and I was like, life is worth living.
Oh yeah, the top, the drop top.
Yeah, that's the one.
Okay, I'm mad at that. I ain't mad at that.
Yeah, no, it was a nice little Ferrari, you know what I mean? It's like, shit, I was thinking I'm out here thinking about someone not calling me. Fuck that. Got right in that little-ass Ferrari and you know, it was nice.
Somebody don't call you, girl, let them be. Even if you gotta call, if you gotta cry and you gotta do all that, girl, do it.
I did. I cried. Yeah, I mean, it's okay.
I'm a crybaby too sometimes.
I love it though.
Let it out.
I felt so good. I was like, oh my God, I just cried. But then like today I woke up like, fuck, okay, um, all right, back to normal.
You be drinking? Like, do you drink a lot when you like going through those type of things?
Oh, I actually don't. That's the time when I'm like, I want to drink tea. Like, I might eat some like pastries or something like sweet, some comfort food. And I just, I just want to be on my couch with my blanket.
Oh, I love how you just said food, food. I used to drink a lot like when I would deal with breakups. And maybe like 4 years ago, I was dealing with a breakup and I had so much liquor at my house. And I remember being on Snapchat and I got all my liquor and I video recorded me pouring all my looking down the drain. I was like, I would never go through like a breakup with some drinking, because your mind, you just— it be— to me, it'd be harder. I feel like you just have to deal with certain stuff sober.
No, it's different because you actually deal with it, because when you drink, it's like you drink the pain away. So now your mind is clouded.
Sober, you back in your same— and sometimes when you drunk, it— now you finna call, you finna cry, you finna—
no, no, I ain't gonna call. What I would do is I'm just going to, you know, when tequila talks to me, I can wander around and I just be like, somebody else is going to get me to laughing. I'll be like, hee hee ha ha. And then, you know, I might make a mistake and I don't want to do that. Yeah, because it's like, you ain't going to, you know, the pain is not going to stop because you're with somebody else. Nope, it's not. It's not. And also at the same time, like, the further, the older I get, the more I realize is You know, you can talk to somebody else, but you're still— it's not fair to that new person that you're talking to them because of the pain that you're going through with somebody else.
And not only is it not fair, I feel like sometimes we might not make the best judgment. Like, you getting over this person, you like, well, let me go over here and talk to this person. And your mind's so focused on, let me talk to this person to get my mind off this person, you ignoring all the red flags that this person is not more shit than this last person was. This person is worse than this person, but your mind not clicking because you so focused on, let me just do this to get my mind off this person. I've done that a few times. Like, I've gotten out of a relationship with somebody and go on to the next person, and I'm ignoring that this person is worse than the last one.
But it's also trauma bonding.
That too.
It's trauma bonding because now you're— you bonded literally because somebody else hurt you, so now you gotta patch the pain up with a new person.
Yep.
Does that work? No. I mean, I'm— maybe it works for somebody. Hey, maybe if that's what it is, then that's what it is. Not for me. I can't do that.
Yeah.
I'm just— and I feel like now I'm like, man, I'm a grown-ass adult at this point. Like, I gotta look inward, see what I did wrong, you know, where I can make— correct certain behaviors where, you know, maybe I've project— because it takes two to tango, you know. So whatever happened happened. Like, it is what it is. We're just gonna just—
and that's why I'm taking this time, like, as I'm by myself and not dating, I'm taking that time to reevaluate and look at the things that I used to do, like, and the things that I used to do, the things that I don't want to accept anymore, like, just taking that time to fully heal. Because eventually I don't want to miss out on a good man because of all the trauma that I have in me, all the things that I have not fixed within myself. So I'm just really taking this time to see like what I need to change and the things, you know what I'm saying? Like, which is pretty good, it's going pretty good. But honestly, I ain't going to lie, I ain't even been thinking about that. I supposed to be working on myself and self-reflecting. I don't even be thinking about nothing that got nothing to do with a man, relationships, none of that.
You know, they say that, um, the only way you can actually grow and learn who you are is when you are in a relationship. Because that's when a lot of traumas start coming up.
Yeah.
And there's a lot of things that start coming up. And I guess like that's, that's when you start, okay, like I need to address this, I need to address that. But I don't know what's the right way to do it, honestly. I don't know. Because sometimes I'm just like, fuck this, I ain't got time for this shit. Like, you know, I got, I got the show to take off the ground and, you know, I want to get on the road. I want to do live shows. I want to act. I want to do So many things like that.
Oh, you want to act, girl? We need to do some stuff together.
Let's do it, let's do it. I really want to act. I'm, I'm about to do, uh, Moneybagg skits.
Okay, let's go.
Yeah, I literally confirmed everything today.
Let's go, girl. Yeah, no, I love Moneybagg. Moneybagg is so goddamn funny.
I thought you were going to say so goddamn fine.
I'm like, figgity fuck no, I wasn't going to say that. I ain't saying he ugly, but I, I ain't saying that. I was going to say that shit. I love Moneybagg though. He funny as hell.
Hey Moneybagg, if I end up being single for the next 2 years, you can be my baby daddy. Fuck it.
Uh-uh. Now this what I came on the show for. Now we getting down to the mess. You heard it, didn't you? She said it.
He called me. He said, he said something.
This nigga finna call you now. The episode ain't even out and somehow this nigga done heard that.
He probably's calling now.
You want to fuck with me, huh?
Shit, you know, I tell you, I love Moneybagg. He's so fucking funny, man. He is hilarious. Like, Moneybagg is somebody who I can like genuinely— like, obviously you probably—
you got to throw your shot at him. No, I'm trying to laugh it off now.
No, no, no, no, no, that's our relationship. We've been talking about that.
Call me, beat me if you want to reach me. You heard Kim Possible. Come on. Come on, she said. No, but that's going to be dope. I can't wait to see what y'all do together.
Yeah, I, you know, maybe, maybe people are going to be like, she said she doesn't want to be a baby mama, now she's going to end up being baby mama number 7 or 8.
He got a lot of kids.
He has kids.
Yeah, he got a lot of them.
His standup is always like, you know, I've always been in a relationship with one woman, and then it's like 4 or 5 times or whatever, however many kids he has, 3 or 4, whatever the fuck.
Oh, I actually did— I see him do standup comedy. He is— he's very funny.
He is. I just saw him in LA at the Netflix Is a Joke, him, Nav. Hilarious.
Nav is funny. Nav is funny.
Nav I am taking Nav to a restaurant to do the tuna steak still. We're doing it. I'm supposed to do it next week.
So, and I like Justin Whitehead too. He's funny.
He was supposed to come on today, but that boy is so funny.
Oh my God. Oh, he's supposed to come on today, so he ain't come. So y'all settled with me?
No, no, it was some different person. He canceled this morning.
Oh, okay.
And I called Justin, but Justin is hosting an event tonight, so, and it was very last minute.
Okay.
So we actually bringing the Marcos trainer, the— what's he—
Fledgie.
That one.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
We're bringing him on.
Yeah. That's gonna be funny.
Yeah. And Justin is probably going to come next week.
Okay. That's going to be funny.
He's hilarious.
Yeah, he is.
Well, girl, this was amazing. I don't know how long we've been talking for. For hours.
Oh, shoot. I finished just in time. I just took my last sip.
You just finished your—
Yeah. My sparkling water, little.
You liked it?
Yes, I did. And I like the combo. I like your energy. I enjoy myself.
Thank you. Thank you for coming on. This is amazing. Unless you got something else to say, some crazy shit to say. Let me look at some cards.
Yeah, look at your cards.
Oh my God, this is some bullshit ChatGPT shit.
That's all right.
Oh, this is, you know, the dating shit. I don't really like talking about that. It has to be organic, has to be natural. Otherwise it's like, yeah, My phone keep falling.
That must mean it's time for me to pay my phone bill. When your phone get to dropping like that, it mean it's time.
Is it? I don't know. Shit.
I don't know till they cut it off and suspend it. Then that's when I know it's time.
Oh my God. This one. What profession has the worst people to date?
What profession?
Yeah.
I don't know. It don't got to be— I don't care what a man do. Shoot. You can be a fisherman. A boxer.
Have you dated fishermen?
A roach catcher. They all crazy. What profession?
You've dated a fisherman?
Hell no.
Where do you find them?
I don't know, on the sea, I guess. Back out with the fish. Catching salmon and shit. Salmonella. It don't, I don't care. I don't know what profession, honey. It don't matter. It don't matter. I just, I don't, I don't know. I'm not gonna say a profession because I don't know. I don't know. What you think?
I think the worst one to date is a man. Yeah, maybe people in the industry. Yeah.
I don't I think I talked to one person in the industry, but— and I, I— you would think that dating somebody who's in the industry like you are, it would probably be a little bit easier for y'all to understand. It didn't go too good. That's why I said I don't think it mattered, the profession.
No, honestly, like, I've dated everybody and anybody. It just didn't end well. Maybe it's just me again. Maybe it's just—
or maybe it's your type.
Yeah, they keep saying I need to try one or two things.
It's either you or it just might be your type. I think we all have a type and sometimes it's good to change up, but I don't know because then even when you change up your type, I'm gonna cheat on him. I think I— and you know what, girl, you sounded just exactly like me. I used to think all the time, but I do know some people that, that is close to me and they switched up their type and it actually worked for them. Really? Because I think outside your type, I don't think you gonna— I don't think you're gonna cheat on them. But I don't know, you might. Just do it quietly. Don't tell them. Don't get caught.
Maybe that's what I should do.
But don't do that though. All jokes aside, if you meet somebody— I just feel like if somebody meet somebody, they don't like them, uh, you know what I'm saying, just leave the person. I feel like the world could be a little bit more better people just start being 100, like, you know what, I don't fuck with you like that, get gone on, I'm just gonna go, I don't like you no more. We need to go back to like kindergarten and stuff. We're like, you're not my friend no more, I don't like you no more. We need to get back to those days. I don't like you no more, um, I'm just gonna keep it going or something. I don't know.
I agree. I said the same thing, and I told my therapist that the other day. I said, you know, I would love for a man to be honest with me. And she was like, but are you honest with them? And I'm like, yeah. And she's Well, look at you. You, you've been feeling some sort of way and you never said that. So that's not being honest. And I'm like, hmm, you just hit me in my motherfucking gut.
How honest we got to be?
I think it's like, for me personally, I know that I think if I share my emotions, then it's a burden to them. So I tend to hold back and I tend to just share the positive, but then there are gonna be times in my life when things are not gonna be, you know, butterflies and pink and roses and all of that. There's gonna be some shit show that's going on. I might be struggling financially. I might be struggling mentally. I might be struggling emotionally. And if you are not there for me, then that's gonna be an issue because it's like you want things when everything is good, but I think you, you, you actually know that the person fucks with you when shit is going down. Yeah, that's how you know that somebody, like, they're going to be there for you through thick and thin, you know, like whatever it is when you're down. And I have friends like that, but it's just whenever, whenever I guess like I show only the good things to men, and whenever things go down emotionally with me and I feel that they're distant, that's when shit just changes. So it's, it's, it's, it's me too. So it's like I mean, you know, I think you got to be honest, but there's got to be some white lies, you know. Yeah, I do some good white lies. Yeah, because we're still gonna be human regardless. Like, people are gonna people.
I know. Who 100% honest? Nobody.
We ain't shit. Everybody ain't shit. Like, sometimes we're all gonna fuck up.
Oh yeah, I know I'm not shit sometimes, and I know that, and I'm okay with it.
But it's just, I feel like it's just the, it's the it's the accountability of it, right? Where you can just say like, listen, I know I fucked up.
Yeah.
And now that's up for a person to accept it or not, you know. But when somebody is just deflecting, then that's— and I feel like unfortunately a lot of men these days are deflecting because it's, you know, it's not that easy to take accountability.
Yeah.
I mean, even women too, like, you know.
Yeah. And I was just going to say that and vice versa.
Yeah.
Because I don't want nobody to think y'all just sitting on there attacking the men. Nah, we said we got our problems. Problems. We said that. Yeah, but yeah, I think that's hard for a lot of people to take accountability. And that's for me too, you know. I've been having a lot of hard truths where I have to take accountability, my dog on self. And it do— it be hard to take accountability. I ain't going to hold you.
But that's how you know you, you got balls. Like, you really strong person. Cuz sometimes you can just laugh shit off, like it is what it is. And sometimes Because like, you know, we as women, we, we imagine things deeper and bigger than what they are just because of our nature.
Yeah.
And sometimes we have fantasy worlds that we live in, no matter how smart we are, how whatever it is, like we still have that. And I think like men are more logical and to them shit is not that serious when— yeah, but it's like my perception of things is not your perception of things. You know what you go through, I might not know, but I can say, okay, I can listen to you and I can say, okay, that's your pain, that's your feeling, and that's valid.
So I don't know.
I don't fuck— I'm not Dr. Cheyenne Bryan. I don't fucking know shit about relationships.
We is not Dr. Cheyenne Bryan. We don't know. We don't know what she know.
Only maybe we need a consultation.
Oh. If she give me one for free, I'll do it. You gonna go to that lady and she ain't got her credentials? Hell yeah!
The first one she calls when she gets off.
She ain't got credentials. Me neither.
Who cares? You know, sometimes a stranger is like the best conversation you can possibly have.
And you know what, her price probably finna drop too. She probably ain't as high as she used to be no tomorrow. We need to get on that special. She probably got a 2-for-1 special.
What if we go together?
That's what I— that's what I'm telling you. That's what I was gonna say. We can go. Yeah, both slow sitting up in there with that lady. Yeah, never said I was fast. Never said I was fast.
Hey, you do respond fast though, so I do too.
I respond fast. Word. But this up here, it don't go as fast as this. This got to procure a late—
the what?
Procure a late— the cessation. I don't sound like Dr. Cheyenne Bryan, baby. See, that's what I'm saying, you don't need no credentials and stuff like that.
You just make up words.
Yeah, she ain't got her credentials. Y'all sit up here and listen to your friends sit up here and tell y'all that dumb shit all the time, and you to them and they ain't got no accreditation. Now y'all want to sit up, Dr. Brian. Well, baby, y'all really gonna call me Flo when y'all see me up in her office. I'mma say, she gonna be saying all them big words. I don't know if the lady lying or not, cuz I don't know no big words.
I don't care, you can just make them up.
Fuck it. That's my problem. I listen to anybody talk. That's my problem. Anybody got no accreditation, you You ain't accredited and you done taught me putting sparkling water in my liquor and you ain't a doctor. So why the hell I ain't gonna go listen to that damn lady tell me do some shit? I was just wanna say something.
What if you just end like walk out and just end up married, you know, and be like, fuck, I didn't wanna get married, but now I am.
Oh, that's just gonna come with my, we'll see when we get to the therapy session. We gonna book our shit today after here. You gonna be in there laughing, I'm being there listening. I came to get some help, Dr. Cheyenne. What you got for me? She over there, less laughing, more listening to Dr. Cheyenne.
See, this is whenever like I have to have a serious conversation, it's just— I just started laughing because I don't know. You don't know. Just put a fucking wall behind me, then I can like at least get serious because I don't have to see—
Yes, here.
Have you ever thought about like sometimes when you want to break up with somebody, it's easier to do it over the phone?
Yeah, in a text message, because I ain't calling you, right? I'm not calling you.
I'm just not doing it in the text message, because if you are in person, you're gonna end up fucking. Like, ain't no fucking way.
Oh yeah, you gotta end up fucking. No way you're gonna be done.
No, ain't no way. Like, you can't—
If somebody say we need to talk in person They not really trying to talk in person.
You trying to fuck?
No.
Yeah.
If I'm finna leave you alone, I'm finna send this text message and I'm finna be done. I'm not finna talk to you on the phone. I'm finna send this message. When it say deliver, I'm finna block you. It's nothing else.
It now says delivered when it's blocked too.
For real?
Yeah.
I was like, you can send it, then block them and it still send?
Yeah. So like, yeah, you, even if somebody's blocked, if like, if I blocked you, text me right now, it's gonna say delivered on your end. Apple is on some shit these days.
Apple be messy as hell recording conversations and stuff. I don't like all this.
But I wish it said like, this person blocked you at like 9:03 PM on this and this day. Like, just let me know. Don't do this.
You right.
Don't do this delivered shit. Just let me fucking know they blocked me at 9:07 PM on a Tuesday night.
Also, after they block you, you can still text them and the message still show up. Is that what you—
Yeah, it's going to say delivered, delivered. So you can keep texting them.
Oh, but it's not going to receive on the other end because they blocked you. Yeah, they changed that because it didn't used to do that. It never said delivered.
Yes, exactly.
Uh, that's how people get hurt and see, okay, because now I'm thinking you ignoring me, but really you messy. Yeah, see, I don't know nothing about that because Apple, I ain't been talking to nobody that got blocked.
Oh no, yeah, one person blocked me.
You know damn well you got blocked. That's how you know the damn feature that's on there. Now she I said, have I got blocked? Yeah, you know the feature, you know all the qualifications and the simulations of— see, because when you send it, it links, you, you know all the breakdowns of it.
I've been blocked.
Steve Jobs, I'm gonna ask you, did you invent Apple? You know all the stuff going on. I've been blocked, you know, damn well. But I think it's because last time you got blocked Last year. Oh, that's good.
Yeah, it was a long time ago. Yeah, it's been some time. It was supposed to end somehow, and it was just— I'm glad it ended.
You be popping up at people's house, you talk to them?
Fuck no. Me? Yeah.
Hell no, girl.
I would have to get dressed, leave my house, drive somewhere. The fuck?
Get dressed? You ain't gotta get dressed when you pop up. You go out the house with whatever you got on.
No, I'm Russian. We don't do that.
Oh, y'all got to get— y'all got to be presentable.
Yeah, you got to take a shower, you got to smell good, you got to look good, you got to have—
y'all popping up to go do it, ain't it?
Yeah.
Oh, we pop up to go beat ass. See, that's why y'all got to get dressed. We don't get dressed to pop up and beat some ass. Y'all popping up to get some and do it.
You got to look good. You might not have makeup on, but like, you still got to look like, okay, you fuckable.
Oh no, you finna get fucked upable, because we finna fuck you up. That's why we popping up. We pop up to fuck up. You pop up to get fucked.
I have people pop up to my house, but they can't get into the apartment complex anyway, so good luck.
Yeah.
I mean, what the fuck you gonna do? Okay, you pull up. I mean, I ain't gonna walk out for what? Mhm. Unless you brought me a gift or like you brought me something that I can't refuse. Like, like a thousand roses.
I thought you going to say $1,000.
Oh, that would be nice too. I would pop out of my house for that too. Yeah, $1,000. Yeah, but like you can make like $1,000 in like roses.
In roses.
Yeah, you can like bring some like nice, some, I don't know, some nice bracelet, something that's like valuable, you know Gold. Yeah, because it goes up. You can send me some bitcoins too. Shit.
No.
Yeah, I'll take some cryptocurrency too. Send 2 bitcoins and I think we can solve the problem.
Bitcoin and crypto.
Oh, just send me something like fucking buy my love.
Yeah, I, I like—
I, I—
okay, now I mess with that.
Yeah, give me like 3 sponsors for like the full year.
You know, like the way you like it.
Yeah, I mean, but what else? Just because you popping up don't do shit to me, you know? Because your money ain't my money, so make your money my money, and then we can have a conversation.
Someone be like, he got money, he got money, is he gonna give you some money?
Your money ain't my fucking money, so I don't care about that. I do care.
Pop your shit.
I do care about financial status though, but I do understand. That his money is not my money. It is what it is. I want more money than— I want to know how much money he got so I can get more money than what he got. So yeah, if in case I leave, I'll be like, okay, this is where I'm going. All right, what are we talking, $50 million? Okay, $100 million. All right, I got it. So now I have a goal.
Oh, I talk to a man got $50 mil, if I pop up, baby, you better call the police for real. I'm popping up to do a stick up.
Sorry, you never talked to nobody who had $50 million?
Hell no, you saying that like that's just casual.
Like no athletes? No, like no, nope, not yet.
You want one?
I don't know, if you don't want to get married, they got the money.
If you're an athlete, holla at me.
What kind? Let's be specific, let's manifest.
I don't care if they play No, you do want to care.
Okay, let's, let's, let's, let's manifest. He got to have $50 million or plus.
Okay.
After taxes, after you pay the taxes.
He can play basketball, football, tennis. You can ride on that little horse thing with that little racket and hit them things. You could play that. You could play foosball. You can tap dance.
Hey, dancers. Yeah.
Dancers.
You could be on Dancing with the Stars.
Dancing with the Stars. Mm-hmm.
Tall? Short? What are we doing?
Oh, I think I want me a tall dude.
Like 6' what?
I don't know the height. Just taller than me. What you think I am?
Like 5'8"?
Okay, 5'8". So I need somebody that's a little taller than 5'8".
Not a little, a lot taller than 5'8".
Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot taller than 5'8". Yeah, yeah, chocolate.
Oh, I was gonna say, yeah, chocolate.
Unless you Chris Brown.
Oh, okay. Oh, stipulations.
That's the only way you coming up in the red. Lighter than light. Um, really, I don't know, race-wise it don't matter.
Does he need to be nice? Like, what's his character? Does he need to be funny?
Yeah, he need to be nice, he need to be funny, he need to have a good relationship with his mom, have family dynamics, a relationship with God. Um, kids, he better have kids because I'm not having no more kids. So the type of relationships I like, I have a BYOB type relationship, bring your own baby, because I'm one and done. Because I was very sick when I had my son.
Okay.
Um, something called HG, and it's just like horrible. And I seen Skai Jackson did an interview recently, and she talked about having that with her son too. It's like the worst thing ever. So I would prefer a guy to have a child because I don't want you to be putting that pressure me, I don't have no kids, and I don't— okay, no, I can't do that. Um, and I don't— do you need to have a child? You need to take care of your child too. Don't just have it just—
well, he got money.
Yeah, that don't mean that, girl. Men have money and stuff, don't take care of their kids. You have to force some of these men to take care of their kids. Child support, all type of stuff. Some of these men, not all of them, put that out there. Some of them. 'Cause there's some very good fathers out here and I know a lot of good fathers.
Do too.
Yeah, I guess that's it.
All right, well, if you see yourself in that description, then DM.
She reads her DMs.
You do, right?
Yeah, I read my DMs.
Slide in the DMs.
Y'all better slide down up in there.
Yeah, 'cause it's about time.
Now, I ain't say all that. I forgot I ain't dating right now. You could slide down and then I'll put you on layaway. Until I'm ready.
But until then, they know everything about rosters. So, you know, they're used to that. They just, they always need to pitch themselves, you know, to see what team they're going to end up on. At least you can start pitching yourself, you know, look for the contract because you never know when the opportunity might come your way. You can see I've been around athletes.
I can see. I take a tennis player too.
Oh, they got money. Yeah, soccer shit. European ones, yeah. Mhm. Just not in America, they don't really get paid that much. But in, in Europe, yeah.
They can play horseshoes. Wait, throw little horseshoes on time. I don't care. And them little men, you know, in Olympics when they run, they get that tall stick and they go up in the air and jump over. I'll take one of them stick jump over people.
Oh my God, there's this one hot one. He went to Texas. His name is Leo. He's like 6'6". He's like a whatever, whatever 5 different disciplines that you play in a sport that, that track meet. If he slides in my DMs, I'm sold.
They look like they probably crazy though. You don't answer that phone, you talking about they can't get in my apartments. That man gonna come up there to your apartment with that stick and run and jump up and he gonna be right on top of your roof. You think they ain't got nowhere up in your apartment? Go on top of one of them stick jumping people. Go right on ahead. That might be my type of man though. Don't answer that phone and see him on top of your roof with that stick.
I would love that.
See that what I said? I'm gonna talk to them. That's so not alley, cuz next I'mma ask him to teach me how to do it. I'm be all on top of that nigga mama roof house. I'm be on top of his mama roof. Oh, you ain't answering that phone? Don't worry about it, I'm going to your mama house with the stick. Give me the stick.
See, that's like— I know, I know I just talked to JoJo and JoJo was like, what the fuck is up with men chasing? Listen, chase me, love me, like love me the fuck down, annoy me with the bull.
I ain't gonna lie, I don't like a chase. When a man don't chase me, that turns me on. When he chasing me, I don't like too much chase. I don't like that.
Nah, nah, nah, I'm just saying that like if you don't talk, you gotta have a little limit on your chase.
Of course, a little but not too much. Just a smidgen.
Yeah, just 1%.
The other 99, show me you want me.
Yep, show me you want me. And if I don't pick up the phone, I mean, shit, if you got your stick, then climb up the motherfucking—
get that stick, climb that motherfucking stick and stick your head down in that roof. I'm going to talk to me a stick jumper. That's what I'm going to do. I feel like that's what— that's all I need it, I need it.
I might have— yeah, you know what, that's a new discipline for me too. I think I want that too.
We need to go to them stick guys.
Let's go, let's go. Track meet.
Track? Oh, that's what it is? They do that at the track?
Yeah, it's a track— it's a field track and field discipline.
Yeah, I'm going to track them down.
All right, and there's not many people that go there, so we're just going to be the only ones in the crowd. We're going to be like, yes baby, come on, jump that stick, boo!
You stick jumping motherfucker. Oh, I love me a stick jumping man. Yeah, that's my new stipulation.
That's my new type. I want me a stick jumper.
I just found me a new type too. We going to the game. We're going to go stick this baby. Come stick this.
I'm not going to more Hawks games. I'm not doing that.
Fuck them Falcons and Hawks.
That's—
see, that market too, that's—
it's oversaturated. I agree. Yes, let them.
Now what? Now watch how many women— babe, I'm gonna go to the stick gang. I'm on the floor stick seat. Now they finna try to bite down on us. Ain't no woman ever said they want a man with them sticks. Watch what's gonna happen now. Watch when he drop.
We're about to have all of them stick jokes in the comments. We can select from 5 of them.
Oh, see, that's why we're gonna go and get our tickets.
But hey, you know what, because it's only 5 of them out there, and that's what I'm saying, it ain't enough, right? So it's just me and you, so we can select out of 5. And it's like, it's, it's like, you know, when you have like 20 different items in your closet, it's hard to choose, but when you have 2, you can only do one or two.
You're right.
So we have 5, we're just gonna select, and it's just any minute, man.
Oh man, whichever one look over there my way, that's the one I want.
Yeah. And then we can swap if anything, and then like, you know, and then be like, okay. Lock it in. I like that. I love it. That's a solution-oriented. Yeah, see, we just, we some solutionaries.
Solutionarist.
Have Cam Newton invited you to go on his show yet?
Who?
Cam Newton.
You guys should talk. I don't think that nigga know who I am.
Oh, I'm about to text him and be like, you need to.
And he gonna say, I don't know who that nigga is.
No. He will— you guys will vibe because you like to create words, so it's going to be a very good conversation of nobody understanding shit. It's going to be you making up shit, he's going to make up shit, and it's going to, it's going to seem like as if you guys have a very like deep and spiritual conversation.
Mhm.
Angry, I'm about to put you on.
I don't make up my words, God put words on my heart. Oh, all that makeup shit. I don't know what you talking about. When God tell me to say something, I say what God puts on my heart.
That's church in you.
I'll back it up. Church girl for sure.
You probably were doing all this crazy shit in high school and praying before that. Okay, God, let me get over this shit. Like, yeah, you probably— don't put God on everything. That's not really—
nah, people do be putting God on everything.
Don't—
let's— no, you can't do that. I don't do that. No, but God do. I'm gonna put him on these words that I said. I said he told me to say it. God said, I ain't told her that.
Like I'm a channelist.
I like that.
Channeled everything that God just told me.
Channelology.
There you go.
Channelology.
You should start your own subject in school. Philosophy? Technology. See, see, I can give you ideas for days.
I'm leaving, I'm leaving here with a whole new mindset. A whole new mindset.
You are. You know what you're also going to leave here with?
A t-shirt.
A present. I was thinking Kourtney put it.
I was going to ask you because you asked me something. I didn't want to be like, well, let's see this.
It is out here. It is out here.
Okay, y'all, let me show y'all my bag.
And I did give you a little bit of a, um, kind of like a man's hoodie since you're not dating. So I thought—
okay, and it's an expensive bag too because these is not— you know how them little strings, and as soon as you pick it up, they come out? So you spend money on this little bag.
It was not from Dollar Tree, I'll tell you that.
Okay, let's see. Okay, come on, talk less. Oh, look at the bag! Hold on, I'm sorry, hold on, y'all, let me show y'all. Oh, look at this! Oh, I love this. And it got the little emblem. Wait a minute, cuz this mic is every damn— okay. And then look at the little emblem right here. Okay, wait a minute. Okay, let me see. Girl, not two things!
Oh yeah, we matching. I have the same t-shirt.
Oh, we going to wear this to the stick show?
Yes!
Oh, talk less, do more. Yes, this is so cute.
When we go to the stick competition, because we want to stick up. You know, mine is just like barely covering my boobs though.
Oh, you trying to get stuck for real? I ain't going out there with my titties hanging out. Now you didn't just push it. I might though, when they look over there, I might just pull it up a little. Oh, this is so cute. Thank you. I won't be doing nobody I got me something.
Really?
Oh, you sure? Not on your show.
That's how we do it. We talk less, we do more, you know. Ah, yeah, we do. We either tell the truth or we lie better, you know. I love these.
These are so cute.
Well, thank you for coming on. Where can people find you?
Oh, y'all got the tags on here and everything.
Yeah.
Oh, y'all wasn't playing. This is not you.
Well, it's not y'all, it's me. And 5 of my different personalities.
And I love all y'all.
Yeah, it's a lot of different personalities. So I love it.
I enjoy being on here.
Thank you. Well, you might come back. Where can people find you?
So y'all can find me on all platforms. My name is B-Lynn Cub. Kind of working on getting the Cub off there because it was a few years ago. But every time I try to find something with like just B-Lynn, it's taken. So I'm working on trying to do that. But every, uh, platform you can find me on, B-Lynn, and then I have a vlogging channel. I have two YouTubes. I have my skit channel, which is B-Lynn, and then I have a vlogging channel that's Being B-Lynn, and it shows more, you know, my personal life every day and a whole bunch of crazy shit because it's not the typical vlogging channel. But so yes, that's where you guys can find me at.
Well, you guys need to go subscribe. Follow, like, let us know what you think about— first of all, let us know what you think about the new studio and what you think about the episode, and we'll see you in the next one. Bye-bye!
Oh girl, you got me a real jogging thing and everything. Wait a minute, this is a cute bag.
Of course.
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