20 Tips for a Lifetime of OCD Recovery

Foreign.

Welcome back. My name is Danielle Thornton Gianni. I'm an anxiety and OCD recovery coach who helps people live happy, fulfilling lives with healthy relationships free of OCD. Today I want to talk about 20 tips to help you get to the lifetime recovery stage for any OCD subset. And make sure you stay until the last tip, because that is the most important one that's gonna help you get to that lifetime recovery stage. My first tip is to get help from a professional, a coach or a therapist who understands OCD and OCD recovery. Now, I know a lot of people wanna try to do it on their own. They're. Your brain is making excuses. I don't have time, I don't have the money to get help. But doing it on your own, you're going to miss a lot of information. There are a handful of people who can have really good success on their own, but most people need help. You need to learn what is going on with ocd. What you're doing that's making it worse, which is compulsions what to do to make it better. And then just the support alone can be so crucial to the recovery process. My number two tip is to get help from somebody who's been through it. Now, there's a lot of people out there, good therapists, who have learned OCD recovery tips that help people with ocd. But having been through OCD myself, there's so many, so much that I'm aware of and that I understand and that I know because I've been through the struggle of OCD and I've been through the recovery journey. So I know what it's like to have OCD, I know what it's like to recover from OCD, and I know OCD's tricks that keep people stuck.

My number three tip is to get help from somebody who believes in full responsibility recovery. I have not struggled with OCD for years. And there is a very particular way that I got there and there's a very particular way that I stay there. Essentially, I use the skills that I learned to get there to stay there. I didn't think that OCD was just going to disappear or go away, but I know how to stay in the recovery stage and I know it's possible to get here and stay here and how. So that's going to help you, because a lot of people out there will say that OCD isn't curable and essentially, no, there's no pill or no thing that we can do that completely takes away doubts, negative thoughts or uncertainty from our life. But that's because negative thoughts, doubt and uncertainty is very normal. So once you learn how to deal with this, once you learn how to get to that full recovery stage where OCD doesn't bother you and how to stay there, that's a wonderful thing. But you have to work with somebody who believes that. Because when I worked in again, my OCD therapists were wonderful. They got me to about 80% recovery, which I was so thankful for. But they had me doing exposure exercises till my discomfort dropped in half. That wasn't enough when I learned to do this, until my discomfort got to zero. And that's what I teach my clients. I experienced a lot better results. So there's a lot of ERP specialists and therapists who are on the right track. They're not taking the work far enough. So learning from somebody who knows and believes that you can get there and has experienced it is going to help you. A ton of tip number four is sticking with the process until you get to where you want to be. A lot of people will use the tools that they have and they get 50% better, but then they stay stuck in that place of, well, I'm a lot better, but this is always probably going to be here, or I'm a lot better, but I just can't stop rumination. That's not true. So sticking with my programs, for example, until you get to where you want to be, I stick with people all the way. And having that support can be really, really helpful. So stick with it. Don't give up. Don't think that 50 or 80% better is just where you're going to live your life, because you don't have to be there. Number five, again, similar to number four, don't give up. Don't give up on it. Don't let your negative thoughts tell you that this just isn't going to work for me. I'm different. It's going to work for other people, but not for me, or I just can't do it. Not true. You can all do it. Ask the questions. Find a professional like myself, a coach, a therapist who can tell you why you're feeling stuck, why you're only 50 or 80% better, and why you haven't been able to make it the rest of the way. Just ask the question. Get. And we will tell you and help you figure that out. Because there are very simple solutions to why people either why ERP isn't working, why you've only gotten a little bit better with one subset, why another subset is showing up there are answers and solutions to that that are just quick shifts that are going to help you continue to make more progress. So don't give up until you get to where you want to go. Number six, get more support when you need it. There's nothing wrong with needing support to do those bigger exposures or more support to figure out what you're doing wrong or why something's not working or more support to learn something maybe that you haven't learned yet. Maybe you've gotten a lot better but you're still struggling and it's because there's compulsions that you're still doing that maybe you don't realize you're doing them, or maybe you do realize you're doing them but you're not sure how to stop and you need somebody to help you, to help hold you accountable to that. I have different levels of programs that people can upgrade to. Maybe the path isn't supportive enough and you need to upgrade to the Path plus. Or maybe you're in the Path plus and some one on one sessions would be helpful, which are discounted. Or maybe you've done a couple coaching sessions and you need a couple more to get you there. There's nothing wrong with that. Or maybe you've done some coaching sessions and the community support would be helpful in one of the membership programs. There is nothing wrong with getting that additional support. Asking for it. Upgrading, that's how we continue to get better is asking for help when we're not able to do it on our own. Number seven, don't let the brain's excuses keep you from doing exposures regularly and consistently or taking that exposure exercise all the way to zero. I work with people all the time who are doing their exposure exercises and they're stopping when the Discomfort's at like a 4 or 5. Go all the way. Go all the way to zero. Don't let your brain convince you that you're too tired, that you have something to do, that the discomfort's not going to go down and it's taking too long. Listening to these negative thoughts is one of the reasons that got us where we're at. So we have to stop listening to those negative thoughts and do that hard thing anyway, keep going anyway. Number eight, Learn about OCD and what's going on in your brain. The more we can understand why we're having intrusive thoughts, why we're having a hard time not doing a particular compulsion, why we're doing compulsions in the first place, what OCD is and how the OCD Cycle works. How to stop the OCD cycle. Once we learn what's going on in the brain, it really helps us to understand how to combat it. Learning about OCD and what's going on can be so helpful for you, and then learning what to do about it is also key. Number nine. Learn and identify all of your compulsions. It's the compulsions that are causing the problem with ocd. It's not the thoughts, it's not the feelings, it's the compulsions and how you're reacting to those thoughts that is causing all of your anxiety and symptoms. So you have to learn and identify all of them before you can actually stop them or bring them down. Right? So making sure that you understand all of these, working with somebody who can help you identify all of these for a program. My membership programs have a lesson and module on this and a compulsions tracker that you can print out, identify all your compulsions, put a number to them, and work on bringing them to zero. And that's going to help you a lot, increase and improve your recovery results.

Number eight, Learn ERP effectively. ERP is something you're going to use for the rest of your life. Just like eating well and exercising for physical health, ERP is the skill that you're going to use to maintain your mental health. So it's not overly complicated. There's only a handful of ERP techniques. But learning it to the point where you feel comfortable applying ERP to any uncertainty, doubt, intrusive thought, or fear that you get, that's where you want to be with it. Because the way that you get to the recovery stage and then the way that you stay in the recovery stage is by applying those ERP techniques every single time that happens. I don't get intrusive thoughts anymore. I don't get anxiety anymore with my thoughts. But I do still have uncertainties and imperfections in my life. And the way that I stay in the recovery stage is I keep my compulsions at zero. And when uncertainty or imperfection shows up in my life, I use the really quick versions of ERP so that it just doesn't stick right. I don't have to use the longer imaginal exposure exercises anymore like I used to. I just do the quick versions. It doesn't stick and it moves on and there's no anxiety. But you'll get there with really understanding all of the ERP techniques and then learning how to stay in that recovery stage with the quick versions of those. And it helps a lot once you get those compulsions. To zero. And the more you practice, it's just automatic now for me, I don't have to think about it. It doesn't feel like work. It's become automatic. Compulsions used to be automatic for me, and I changed that with my ERP and acceptance practice to the point where ERP is now automatic. Compulsions are not. Number 11, apply ERP every single time a thought shows up that causes discomfort. That discomfort may be a 10, which feels like high anxiety and panic. It might be a one, which just feels like this thing's kind of bothering me and I want to figure it out or avoid it or anything in between.

When you're not applying erp, you're probably going into compulsions, and it's the compulsions that feed the ocd. So you need to learn to apply ERP immediately. Every single time a thought shows up that causes discomfort, whether that's a longer term technique or a very quick technique. Like I mentioned earlier, applying ERP every single time, and that's how it becomes more automatic and how things stop sticking is when you're catching it every time and applying it every time. Tip number 12, don't stop. Don't stop applying ERP. Make it a lifetime practice. Anytime uncertainty shows up. So every time I think about the possibility of my parents dying, the possibility of my husband dying, the possibility of something not working out, I have learned and made it automatic to go. You know what, that might happen, that might. It may not work out, but I'm not going to worry about it, not going to think about it. Off it goes, right? So ERP isn't something you just stop. You do and then you stop. It's something that you continue doing. It's a lifetime skill to keep OCD away and to keep your brain from going back into those old patterns. Number 13, choose to believe that you can do it. Even if you're not 100% sure. It's okay to believe that you can do it, even though you're like, I don't know if I can. We need to have hope, we need to have positivity, and we need to believe that it's possible even if we're not 100% sure. I wasn't sure I could get here. There were times in my OCD recovery journey where I didn't think I could get here. But I continued to choose to believe that it was possible. And that kept me motivated and kept me going. And it is possible for every single one of you because as I've said before, ERP always works. I'VE never seen it not work for someone who's doing it properly and consistently every single time. The only way it doesn't work is when compulsions get in the way. And all we have to do is eliminate those compulsions, and it's going to work every single time. You have to choose to believe that you can do it even when you're not 100% sure. Number 14. Develop that mental strength. Choose to choose the thought that feels better. Choose to believe. Choose to do the ERP Even when it's difficult. Mental strength is just a choice. It's just a conscious choice. When your brain's pulling you in this direction, you. You're choosing to go in this direction. Even when it's hard, even when it's uncomfortable. Develop that mental strength. It's a practice. It's going to take time, and you might not always be perfect at it, but you can develop that skill and that mental strength where you feel strong and confident in those skills. Number 15. Choose to stop automatically believing any of your negative thoughts. Thoughts are just thoughts. They're not facts. Feelings are not facts. So choosing to give meaning to thoughts and feelings is not a good technique. So stop automatically believing that just because you have a thought followed by a feeling that it's true or that it means something, it's not. We've all had negative thoughts that we thought, oh, I'm never gonna do this. This is never gonna happen. This is always gonna be this way. It's never true. It. It's just a negative thought. And we have to stop believing those because believing a negative thought gives us negative feelings and then motivates us in a negative way. And that's not what we want to do. Number 16. Choose to start having hope, believing positive thoughts, and having positive perspective without giving yourself certainty. None of us know what the future holds, but we can focus more on the positive possibilities than the negative ones. Right? So you're going to start choosing to focus more on the positive than the negative again, without giving yourself certainty, because none of us know. The only thing we know and that we can control is ourselves. And the more you nurture these positive thoughts and positive beliefs and positive perspectives, it may not feel believable or real at first, but the more you nurture it, the better you feel and the more likely you are to experience positive results. So regardless of how you feel, I want you to continue to nurture this practice. Number 17. Accept that 100% certainty and perfection do not exist anywhere in life. Everything has pros and cons. Everything has Positives and negatives. Life is full of positive feelings, negative feelings, and a ton of neutrality and boredom. So the more you can accept this, the less that OCD is going to bully you into needing certainty and perfection and you're going to get so much peace. The more that you accept that nothing is certain, nothing is perfect. Even when it seems like it is, it's not. It does not exist. And this is going to quiet OCD very quickly when you practice acceptance of this. Number 18. Practice mindfulness as much as you can. Mindfulness is essentially being in the present moment, being mindful of what's going on right now, being in the moment with who you're with, with what you're doing or going and doing something in a mindful way. You can't be ruminating and analyzing and obsessing when you're focusing on the present moment. So be present. Bring your attention back to the present moment as much as possible. And again, you'll retrain your brain to be more present and ruminate less. Number 19. Practice self compassion. No matter what. Even if you made a mistake, even if you weren't perfect, even if you were mean or you were rude to somebody, self compassion is all about having compassion for ourselves, no matter what. Being patient, allowing ourselves to be imperfect, accepting that we have OCD or that we're struggling with something, that we have intrusive thoughts, that we have weird, strange, negative thoughts, right? And that's normal. We don't have to beat ourselves up or blame ourselves for things that are out of our control. We're human, we're imperfect, we have negative, crazy thoughts. And we're not always the best version of ourselves. And that's okay. It's true for all of us. So be compassionate with yourself no matter what. You're always doing the best you can with the information that you have and the situation at hand. And lastly, get your compulsions to zero. Make sure you know what they are, and you're always focused on getting them to zero. It doesn't mean that they're never going to go up again, but your overall goal is to get them to zero. As soon as you get your compulsions to zero, you're going to feel like OCD doesn't bother you anymore. And the more and longer you keep them at zero, you're going to be free of ocd. This is so crucial, it's so important, and it's true for everybody. I hope this was helpful. Please make sure you comment like and subscribe so I know what information was helpful for you. What you want more of. And, and if, again, if you want help with ocd, you can check out the link in the description below. We will talk to you very, very soon. Have a good day.