Monique ThompsonLicensed Professional Counselor-Supervisor & Infidelity Recovery Specialist

The men women trust most may be more likely to cheat

8 May 2026 · 1 min

Watch on YouTube

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In this brief YouTube segment, Dr. Monique Thompson, a specialist in couples recovery from affairs, discusses findings from a study of 900 individuals that show men who display protective, chivalrous behaviors—such as opening doors and being overtly nice—have an elevated risk of cheating. She emphasizes that niceness should not be conflated with integrity or trustworthiness, especially in the aftermath of an affair. Thompson advises partners to prioritize evidence of integrity and trust over superficial niceness when seeking healing and rebuilding a relationship. She concludes by offering her support and inviting viewers to contact her for further guidance.

Chapters

Recent research, 900 people, 900 people were studied, and what they found was that out of 900 people, men who appeared protective and chivalrous, meaning they open the doors, they're nice to you, also showed elevated risk of cheating. Being nice does not equal not cheating. Nice equals safe. Nice equals integrity. Nice does not mean he's not also being nice to somebody else. I'm Dr. Monique Thompson. My specialty is couples recovery from affairs. And a common mistake during the time after the affairs, you want somebody to be nice to you, to schedule the appointments, to get you started in therapy together, to be kind. But what you really want is integrity and trustworthiness. So focus right there, not on just being nice. I'm out here rooting for everybody. Reach out to me if you'd like to learn more.