Femi LazarusCEO at Femi Lazarus Consulting

Stop dismissing yourself because you want to please everyone. #Publicschool

26 Jul 2026 · 1 min

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1:29

You're taught to blame yourself when people don't reciprocate care, creating cycles of trauma and self-sacrifice. The responsibility lies in systemic dynamics, not your inadequacy. Stop internalizing failure and start setting boundaries.

What you met on ground where you were born is not your fault. The mentality of your dad or your mom is not your fault.
Stop. That's one—
that's where trauma begins from. It begins with you blaming yourself. Maybe there's something I didn't do. Please, many situations that we find ourselves We didn't quickly know that it's a bad situation because you have been wired with the culture of blaming yourself first. If you have somebody you care about who doesn't care about you, don't blame yourself for the— ah, what's that? I said maybe there's something I'm not doing right. What? Do you understand what I'm saying? Do you understand? If, if, if, if your gesture is not being reciprocated, stop blaming yourself. That maybe the way I spoke, maybe the way I looked at you, maybe the way— no, it's because there's a system that has always dismissed your own actions. And you can't— living with that as a strategy is not sustainable. I want to— if you are doing that, stop it.
The Public School with Femi Lazarus, every Sunday on YouTube, 8 PM Nigerian time.