🌟How to Network Like a Pro: Tips for Building Powerful Relationships with Shane Traynor

Well, been looking forward to having you for quite some time mate. So it's great to finally get you on this.

Yeah, likewise. Excited. Thanks so much.

Yeah, yeah. So what I'll do is I like to start on time and guys are used to it. So I'll go through a bit of an intro and then hand over to you. Do your thing and then hopefully we have some time for people to. If people have some Q and A and things like that. Sounds good.

Sure thing.

Awesome mate. So thanks so much. So let me have a look. I have some notes actually about which I have lost. It's classic in it, so I'm pretty sure I had some notes a minute ago which I have lost. This is great. Well, I'm not too sure. I have to figure something out so. So yeah, yeah, you know, so if I remember. Well it goes like this. So. Welcome everyone. Welcome to the Deal Finer Corner. So this is your weekly property talk show brought to you by Propty Filter and hosted by myself, Guillaume Black, your favorite Frenchman, CEO and co founder of Propsfilter. And as you know it's the UK's highest rated platform to find deals and we're on a mission to empower our property investors to find another thousand deals this year thanks to the Prop Filter blueprint. And the purpose really with this Deal Finder Corner is to give you more and the best of the available resources by inviting expert guests who will share with you the latest and most current strategies and tactics and secrets. But what actually works right now in terms of finding and making deals and the reality of systemizing and running a high performance business in property. So it really is my pleasure to introduce you my very good and dear friend Shane Traynor on today's Infinal corner. So Shane is an award winning networker, entrepreneur, number one best selling author and public speaker. He runs several businesses including co owning the award winning Co Arch Architecture practice which is based in Birmingham and dedicated to helping property developers and professionals increase profits without compromising space and design. They do an amazing work and he's really passionate about meeting with people and he's made a name for himself for being really known for attending 157 networking events in a single year. And through this experience he discovered his deep passion for helping others, referring people to one another and really our networking worked for him with this law of reciprocity and how he's been able to unlock an endless amount of opportunities and see this work for other people all based on connection. So I'm really really looking forward to hear more about your talk mate today. So what you can expect from today's episode. So Shane is going to talk about the power of reciprocity. Or you can create win win connections and open doors effortlessly or you can shift your mindset around networking and why most people network wrong or get networking wrong and approach it with a very different way where you can go into it with confidence and authenticity. And then we'll be talking about how you can turn conversations into opportunities. And Shane has got lots of little tactics and strategies to make meaningful conversation connections that lead into real business and personal growth. And hopefully this will trigger you to have a few questions and we'll have some time to pick my dear friend's brain. So thanks so much for joining us today, so very much. Looking forward to hearing about your talk. So please give Shane a massive property filter virtual welcome. Welcome my friend. Over to you.

Excellent. Thanks so much. Yeah, so thank you everyone. So my name is Shane Trainor and I'm going to be talking to you today about the art of making great connections. So yeah, lots about networking. So I always find it a bit weird when I've done these where people have come to a networking event to get talked out about networking, but I definitely feel after doing it so much and doing that many events in one year, there's definitely an art form to it. And the more you, you do network and the better you get, the more you'll get out of networking, the more opportunity you'll create. Endless opportunities, which is what I've done over the past couple of years. So yeah, as Guillaume said, I'm the co owner and director of Co Arch Architects and I also run my own networking event for property developers as well and that's based in Birmingham. So who, who actually thinks that networking doesn't work? I actually can't see that many show of hands but I always ask this at the start of my talk and no one's ever, yeah, brave enough to put their hand up. I did, I did do this talk at a college once and I had about four students put their hand up and didn't think it would work. So I'm here to say, like, it definitely does work and these are all the things that I got out of NETworking in just one year of really pushing networking as hard as I could. And in 2022 I set the goal to do 100 events in a year just to experiment and see, well, what can I get out of it, what, what can come from networking and can I grow the business by just going to loads of networking events? And these are all the stuff that. That happened. So how does networking really work? Well, it's super simple. So I love a diagram. So you're there, you go to a networking event, you attend and let's just go. Let's go to the. Let's go clockwise. You connect to someone, you exchange details and you arrange a one to one and then a business transaction happens after that meeting because you can do immediate business straight away. Or it goes the other way where you connect with someone, arrange one to one and they say, I know someone who could work well with you. And you say the same thing and then you get introduced to another person and then you do business with them. And that is pretty much simply how networking can work and how you can get business from networking. These are all the things you can get from networking. So. And that I've managed to get. So build communities like Guillem as himself, he's built the property filter community. You do networking events as well? We did the. The inception of networking events I call. Which is the property host summit as well, which, which is amazing that we do once a year. Accountability groups. Lots of fulfillment. I've made friends for life. Lots of business transactions. Too much opportunity where I've had to learn how to say no a lot more which I really struggle with. Joint ventures and fun perks. Now going on to one of the fun perks because it's. I feel like sometimes to have a fulfilling life, it's not just about business. I'm going to share a quick story with you. I went to go to a construction firm to check out their quality because I want work with us architecturally and past business. And I was having a conversation with the director of the company and I don't know how it got onto the conversation, but it turns out he's a pilot and he flies small planes. And as a joke I said to him, can you fly me down to the Isle of Wight to pick up my girlfriend and like fly me back? And he was like, let me think about it. Yeah, go on then. So we, we split the fuel costs and I met him at the. An airport in Burton and we, we. He flew me down and he let me fly the plane. And. So after doing that, actually I can assure you that flying a plane I found pretty boring. You just sit in there and you have to like hold it together for like a long time. So I just did. I just let him carry on and enjoy the view. But yeah, lots of fun perks from. From just network. So going on to like tips misconceptions and just general thoughts of what I think and how be better a better networker if you like. So just a show of hands or maybe in, in the chat box and G can, can read some of these like, like who hates going to networking events solo even though you know you sort of have to, to find the deals. Get out your comfort zone like game if you want to read a few to me if anyone does put any in there. I know like even I now like going to all those networking events I still get anxiety sometimes and I just have to like throw myself in and you do have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable especially if you're a introverted personality type or if anyone's done the wealth dynamics you more of like a steal and you, you just hate talking to people but you know it's part and parcel of going out and getting deals and, and meeting with investors etc so it can be daunting for sure. But the way I get around that is when I go to a networking event and I'm on my own, I'll look for someone, I mean I don't know anybody at all. I'll look for someone that's also a solo networker and then say like are you here on your own yet? Me too. You've got some synergy straight away and then you can like start your conversation from that. A big one. So when I'm normally doing these talks I'll get people up to reenact a bit of like a sort of semicircle if you like. So if I'm standing here and then there's another person here and another sort of person here, I what I would, what I would do this. I would see that there's a bit of a gap sort of. More, more. So look, from a psychology point of view there's a gap to, to jump in there and introduce yourself and again you just got to be comfortable with getting uncomfortable and it's more likely that subconsciously, as I said from a psychology point of view that, that that group is welcoming and they're not closed off, they're not having a private conversation. And the way I would approach that is if you're feeling brave enough is just go hi, sorry guys, do you mind if I jump in? I'm Shane, what's your name? Obviously shake everyone's hand like please carry on your conversation. I'm just here to network and meet new people and I guarantee you nine times out of 10, probably every actually 10 out of 10 times the person to your left or to your right will turn to you and start having a conversation with you. Yeah, it happens every time. And also on the flip side as well, guys. So if you're chatting with. So you. If you're in a group of three to four and you can see someone hovering to your side, invite them into the conversation and. And bring them into speed, because I imagine you know how uncomfortable that might be and that they're on their own. So bring them into the conversation, bring them up to speed, and that's how you can get to be that more likable, like character. Awful questions. So these are questions that really do my head in at networking events. And I'm sure you are. Do. We're very British, obviously. Guillem's French. So, like, do we do. Does he have the same questions? I don't know. I'll have to ask him shortly. But like, are you busy? We're all busy. If we weren't busy, what are we doing with our lives? So we're all busy. Stop asking that question. What do you do? Although that is obviously a very important question, because you want to find out what they do. Like to see if you can help them and they can help you. There is a better way of asking that question. And the worst one is the most British thing on this planet is asking about the weather lot. Why? Why, why? Why are we doing this? Can we break this tradition of asking about the weather, please? So don't ask about the weather. Boring. Now, the better questions is so number one. So tell me, Guillaume, what. What got you into what you do today? I want to know the story. Everyone's got a story. Find out the story about. About that person. It gives. Gives more. Gives more context, put more. Puts more meat on the bone about. About that person and that. That human being you're talking to. Like, if. If you're working with investors like you would, or like, you want to look, you're looking for JV partners or. Or land agents to build proper, and I mean proper, meaningful connections and relationships. You know, you. What does you want to get more meat on the bone of, like, what's going on? What's this person like? What makes them tick? What makes them get up in the morning? So that leads on to, like, question two, which is better than what do you do? So asking them, like, who's the perfect person you'd want to meet at this networking event that could help or make a positive impact on your business? And they will say, well, actually, if someone asked me that, like, well, actually, that's such a good question. So I own an architect practice and we're looking to work with more developers, investors across England particularly at the moment, we're looking to work with. We're doing quite a lot of children's care homes and commercial conversions. So anyone that wants, wants to work with us in that sense, like, please introduce us. And it's a better question. And therefore when you ask better questions, you get better answers or should get better answers. And then the third one as well is what is one thing you enjoy outside of business and work? Because I find if I want to get to, to know people on a level and just, you know, look at, look, look at it going past business again, putting more meat on the bone of, of that person as an, as an individual. And I remember I spoke at a PPN once and I, I think it was like event 95 or something. And I was just a bit sick and tired of asking and the same old questions. So I just asked this person outright. I was like, what's your favorite ice cream flavor? And then she, she, she was like, bit like, what, what do you mean? I was like, well, let's, let's get off the subject of property for a moment. Like, you know, let's talk about ice cream for a minute. And it was mint choc chip. I remember that quite clearly. And mine's bubblegum. So she called me a child because mine's a bubblegum flavor. So anyway, it ended up being about six of us talking about ice cream, which just made it a bit more different. And then, but next time we saw each other the next month that we was all sort of, you know, we'd made friends over that silly conversation initially. So asking better questions is, is important. And what's the worst that can happen? A networking event. If you're, if you're scared to do networking, you get told to, to piss off. Well, you know, I'm gonna say it's not gonn that that event is there to network. That's what these events are, are created for, remember? And so if someone does say this or tells you to go away, not, not politely, then I don't want to be their friend and I don't really want to work with them anyway. There's plenty more people that are a lot, a lot nicer and welcoming. So, yeah, what's the worst that can happen? Probably nothing. Expecting an immediate return is a key one. So I've met and come across a lot of business development managers from law.

Firms.

Accountancy practices, even land and new homes. And they're always there and it's like what's in it for me? I'm not going to go to this network event. It's rubbish. I'll get nothing out of it. And I think it's just the wrong outlook of the time invested. You've got to look at it from, from a long term point of view. It's like, you know, let's go, let's go back to, to dating someone you, you wouldn't expect to get into bed with them on day one. It can happen but let's not expect it to happen. Right guys? So let's, yeah, think it's definitely a long term game is networking. You want to build that relationship, build that rapport, find out what they do, find out how you can help them and in turn they will, how they will help you. And I would look at it as a minimum six months, nine months, even a year. Like some of the people that I've met on day one, I haven't done business with them until a year later or even like a year and a half later. So it's definitely a long term view. And I think networking is a skill for life as well. And especially if you're in property, it's such a people game, you've got it, you know, you're in property. If you are in property for the rest rest of your life or business, then networking should just be a part and parcel whether you do it once a month or once a week. So I bet I can guess everybody's favorite word in this, in this chat, in this, in this meeting. Can everyone guess? See if anyone get, I'm going to look at the chat now. Deals a good one. Let's get, let's get some, let's get some interaction. We've got a yes. Investors, we've got a yes. I mean there's good words but no, it's all wrong. Financial freedom. That's two words. Ah, Mark, Mark smashed it. So Mark got it correct. It's his name. So everyone's favorite word is their name. And Darren, you got it correct as well. I mean, yeah, okay, investors might be your favorite word but yeah, your name is your favorite word and the reason it is your favorite word is because what, what happened? What do you do when someone calls your name? You turn to it, right? Like you, you, your senses, picks it up even subconsciously. Sometimes when you hear, hear something and it's not your name but it sounds like your name, you still turn to it. So that must mean your name is very important to you. Especially when, when people get it incorrect I'm sure. Guillaume, you've had your name. I get, I get called Sean all the time. Does my heading like how can you get Sean and Shane mixed up anyway. But I digress. So yeah, what's that? Gwyllum, Willem, all sorts. So yeah if you, if you can remember someone's name that is so important and again it will build, help build rapport a lot quicker. So and the best way to remember someone's name. I know Bill Clinton used to write down people's names on cards but I think we've moved technology's move past that now. So the way I remember someone's name seems, I'm, seems to be quite good at it. But if you're not good at it then a little tip is if, when you're talking to someone, when you find out their name keep using their name in their, in their sentence. So yeah so tell me what you do for, for business. Shane and how you got to this point. Shane. Or like what do you think of this networking event? Shane. And keep repeating it and that should hopefully cement their name in your brain and that is one way to keep remembering it as well and then get it like when you get their contact details just like, just keep repeating it in your head. This is more of again like a sort of like psychology one. So if you are at a networking event I'd say suggest staying away like from the exit. And what I mean by that is normally where the exits and entrances are, that's where the check in desk is to go to get your badges. And I think that's where some of the worst conversations can happen or not as, not as good conversations. And the reason I say that is because when people are checking in they get in their bearings, they're wondering where to go, where am I sitting, where's the bar. And they're not thinking about networking in that moment even if you don't know it. So the best thing to do is go to the bar, go to the coffee tables, go, go to scout the room out first. And once you've got that I always find the best place to go is probably like the bar or the coffee or the breakfast station, whatever type of event you're at and get, get your drink. And then once you're in, you know, you've got your drink in your hand, you're in networking mode and then you're ready to go. So say like try not to have the conversations of you know, speaking with new people by the entrance slash exit. And then if you, if you're someone who, who you go into an event and you don't feel like you've got anything to offer. I used to feel like this for sure. Like before I got into the property space and all I'd read is a few property books, didn't, you know, live with my mum in, in a flat and I didn't feel like had anything to offer but it was actually far from the truth. Like I may have had a potential. Well, my nan used to invest in property without calling herself for an investor and actually she, she turns out, well, she, I wish she was an investor. She got dementia now. However, I know she's got some flips and had some capital so I could have gone to her for, for some money and so I had my nan as a potential investor. I have plenty of time on my hands because working in the school as an I T technicians have had all the time before and after work and during my lunch hours and then I've got, I've got two ears and one mouth for a reason. So I want to listen a lot, I want to learn and I've got lots of energy. So I had all this to offer and then in turn when I put that out into the universe. I then met a developer that took me under his wing and he mentored me everything he knew about development. So I've never paid for mentorship, I was actually getting paid to be mentored. I kind of flicked the switch if you like and found a bit of a life hack. So that's what I had to offer. I didn't have money but I had time. I potentially had a connection. You guys might have connections and I had energy, willingness to learn and two ears to, to listen. And I think it's so important is to be authentic. Like I can smell a mile away and like I, I get it when you're starting out and you're, you're fresh, but I don't think there's any reason to lie. Like, I sort of see it when people like have, you know, they're working their 9 to 5 job and they want to get, they've got no cash so they want to get into property and they start with, let's say, you know, I'm going to pick on the, the rent to rent model when they want to get into rent to rent because it's, or, or deal sourcing and they go, yeah, I've got this deal, I've got this investor and I got this and I get, you know, there is a bit of fake it till you make it To a degree. But I think if you're lying, you're not only lying to the people you're trying to build a relationship with, you're lying to yourself as well. So at the very beginning I was just, I was super truthful and upfront to developer. I said, look, I've read these books, I know how to appraise deals because I've watched these videos. This is who I know, this is who I don't know. This is the reason I want to get into what I'm doing. And he took me on because I was genuine and authentic. So yeah, I just think like, it is your best perfume, guys, and yeah, wear it with pride if you're, if you're new to the game and always be networking as well. So there's been two scenarios where I just, maybe it's because maybe I'm a bit nosy or just like to tune into people's conversations sometimes. But like, so I do the odd DJing on Friday and Saturday evenings and I was at this, at this bar and this gentleman came in with his wife and their two friends and I was playing some like some classic ABBA disco music and they really liked it, they were dancing and he came over, just got chatting and we got into the conversation of Lee was like, was this, is this your full time job? I was like, no, like I could say tech practice. Like, oh, that's cool. Like I'm, I'm a Qs but by trade. And I was like, okay, brilliant. Like, you know, maybe we've got some synergy, let's connect on LinkedIn. So I did connected with him and then like I didn't hear of him then for a while and then three months later he came back in and he's like, hi, hi. Do you, do you remember me? And I was like, how you doing, Peter? Because remember when I was talking to him the first time around, I kept using his name to reinforce me remember his name and I hadn't seen him on LinkedIn since we connected. And he was like, I can see you really active on LinkedIn and what, like what you do with the business and yeah, I like what you work, etc. He was like, I've got a family friend that's looking for an architect they had planning refused in the 80s for a single dwelling. Would you be able to help? I was like, yes, absolutely. So there's a potential project that we're looking at at the moment. And then the second one happened to be some QS's again, but I was sitting on, on the train and there was two people behind me and one of the guys behind me. I could hear him talking to his friend about him and his wife looking to do a loft conversion and I just couldn't help myself. I just turned around and went, really sorry to interrupt guys, I've got to get off the train shortly. But I couldn't help but over here you're looking to do a potential Lufthan baby. He's like, yeah, that's right. I was like, yeah, I, you know, I'm a co director of an architect practice. Maybe we're able to help, like tell me what, what you guys do. You sound like you're in the business and you're like, yeah, we know, we're quantity surveyors, we work in the city. It's like, oh, like give me your business card. You know, maybe we can, we can do some work together. And then again, there's another project we're looking at at the moment of a, of a loft conversion. But it's just like always be networking and if, you know, don't be afraid if you like hearing someone are talking about some where you can potentially help them or you know, if you ever hear, if you ever hear someone chatting to someone else about property, don't be afraid to just dip in and then if they tell you to go away there and then obviously you're not at networking events. So it's kind of like fair enough, it's a private conversation. But yeah, sort of next level being a bit ballsy. But yeah, always be networking is a bit of a rule and maximizing your reach as well. So as I said, everyone's got a story to tell. Do, do things like what I'm, what I'm doing now if you can. Like, like I host three, three networking events and I do like talks like this. This is the best way to network because I'm telling everyone and sharing what, what I do and what my business is to everyone at once rather than, than people individually. So I definitely say if you get the opportunity to, to speak at a networking event, even if it's just on a single deal that you've done and what the challenges were at a small networking event, because within that presentation you can then put what you're looking for, whether it is investment or another opportunity and just a brief explanation about who you are. So I challenge everyone in this call is to go and speak to a networking event host and get yourself on, even if it's just for five or ten minutes and a, and a, and a Massive one. Yes, of course, I'm nosy game. Just, just Senior, senior message. Yeah. So the law of reciprocity, absolute game changer this one. And I discovered this about a third way into doing all those networking events the other year and it was basically the law of reciprocity. Firstly, I challenge you to say reciprocity quickly because that's hard enough. And the law of reciprocity itself is it's giving something without wanting anything in return. And I realized very quickly that if I was just to focus on helping others to get what they want, whether that was a bit of my time, some knowledge, some advice, if someone bought like a project to me and that was like look, I just need your eye on this like piece of land. Like roughly what can we fit on there? All right, let's have a quick look and let's spend like 20 minutes on it, you know, and then it just found like, it just like came back round in some way, shape or form and you know, it might not come off that person directly but it's just you create more opportunities when you use the power of law of reciprocity. And if for anyone that knows Dan Hill, property entrepreneur, he's wrote a book called Karma Credits which again emphasizes the point of the law of reciprocity. And like game changer Dan Hill game I'm sure you know about it. Yeah, like just think when you go to networking event, think how can I advise this room? How can I help people within this room? Like take just be a bit more selfless. Obviously we do need business, we need to help ourselves as well. But just think a little bit outside the box of how you can help individuals in this room and start asking these questions because I guarantee you people will help you get what you want then. And then obviously the, the follow up is absolutely key for meeting these individuals at events or, or out and about and have a good CRM system. So we use asana in the practice and we have, I have like a list of like contacts and then they're from service providers to like our clients and, and potential future clients or even people that I've just sort of met really that are looking for deals and also I'll keep my ears and eyes to the ground so have some kind of place where you know, you make sure you follow these up. And I sort of put, put the, put people in, into, into categories not in a sort of in a nasty way but it just in a way whereby I can categorize them in my head when I, when I speak to people. So category A for instance. So I meet someone at a networking event and they're like, I need an architect, I'm looking for them now. Great. I can do business with them right away pretty much that week if they're looking to appoint someone or they've got a project imminently waiting. So that is category A. Category B is the same scenario but maybe they're looking to work with an architect maybe in the six months to potentially a year or they're just starting out and they, you know, they need their, they need to get their power team in place. Or category B can also be potentially in my scenario it can be a law firm that has access to a black book of developer contacts and vice versa or I've got a black book of developer contacts for them and that can be category B. So you're not doing business directly with them, but you're doing business with their contacts and vice versa. And then category C is a little bit more tricky to establish but not to be dismissed. So I'm going to pick on an let's say insurance brokers for this one. So apologies if anyone's an insurance broker here but like going to the chamber of commerce events last year, I'd come across like an insurance broker that would only ensure fleets of like HGV delivery trucks. So probably wouldn't be able to do business with them to be honest. However, if they want to have a chat with me, I do need to make sure that I'm limiting and protecting my time like we all should be protecting our time, right. Not only for our personal peace but for the growth of our, our businesses. Right. So I'd have that time and just, just assess it whether it's a quick phone call or like a 15 minute Zoom call depending on what it is. And then what, what did happen? The broker that I spoke to didn't hear from him for six months but because you know, we got on and we just had a chat about just general stuff and what he did and what I did six months later he was like Shane, my next door neighbor needs an extension. I know you know we had a good chat a few months ago. I know you're not, you're in an architect business. Here's this contact. So again you just never know who knows who or where that goes. So tricky to us. Trickier to establish but not to be dismissed and then just, just going on to like how it has actually benefited like co arch really so just from, from network and it's, it's all of our pretty much all of our leads 80 we, we worked it out is roughly about 87% of our business came from, from networking events and then from like the referrals of the people that we did jobs for and just this continuous snowball then so, so much so that we've gone from a team of three to 11 in, in a year which, which is crazy. Never had to deal with that situation before. But you know we, we continue to grow so we've worked on business changing projects and what I mean by that is we've gone from just only working on you know, extension probably one off house to like apartment schemes now in fact that's wrong now because it says 8 I need to update that to 11. And then yeah the Property Developers show as well we exhibited there. We did that for free because that was an exchange. So I looked at a few things for Scott and he was like well in fact the value you've created for me there, I'll give you the same value at the Property Developers show. And then yeah other sponsorships we've done through just helping, helping people out and the same with the developers network by, by having a networking event it's created opportunities, investments, deals, joint ventures. In fact I met my business partner now he was the sponsor of the networking event that I set up and that's how I met him being given certain tools so like Search Land we use to, to. To find like well more, more so to find out like BNG and all these like credits etc. We get that tool in exchange for sponsorship etc. And we've built a trusted community with 498 people in there now. And then off the back of that these are the two other events that I've created. Just very informal and just a bit more relaxed and and then this was more so like a new one that I created last year and this, this one was more so like how do you get out the comfort zone of a networking event without being too formal or like how to break the ice. So I decided to create networking events in gaming venues around the city. So like the F1 Arcade virtual reality and I found that people clicked a lot quicker because they were competing whilst like trying to network as well. So that was fun and just a quick tool if anyone didn't know about it. LinkedIn if you go to the search bar and click on little QR code. If you don't have business cards or you don't want to use business cards, use this as, as a, a little virtual business card. And what I would suggest with this as well is just make sure you. You have a good profile as well. And it is up to date and it's not just a blank, you know, silhouette profile photo. I'm pretty sure that that's. That's quite important. And yeah, finally, I just want to leave you with this quote. True networking isn't just about climbing ladders. It's about building bridges for others to cross, which I truly believe will help amplify your connections, your business and just whatever you're trying to do or you're trying to connect with in life. And that's it. That's me done. Any. Any questions?

Thank you, mate. Really appreciate it. Yeah, do connect with Shane. You know, that's all the. That's the point of all of this, isn't it? Thanks. Thanks a lot for that. Do you find on all the networking you've done, you know, like there were some like, awkward moments or awkward little stories or anecdotes you've had or do you find yourself.

Any questions?

Thank you, mate. Really appreciate it. Yeah, do connect with Shane, you know, that's all the. That's the point of all of this, isn't it?

Thanks.

Thanks a lot for that. Do you. Do you find you put yourself in awkward situation and you didn't die? You know, like what. Some. Some funny anecdotes.

There was. There's been a few scenarios whereby there's speaking to some individuals and it's probably just their personality type. Like, it's like trying to draw blood from a stone. And like, I'm really trying see one gentleman laughing there. So yeah, it's. It's really difficult to, you know, I'm trying my best to like get stuff out of them. You was. Was difficult to even get a name and you know, it might be a little bit awkward. And I tell you one, it is like, I think being truthful as well about, you know, if you want to leave a conversation, there's certain ways to do it because sometimes, obviously we get stuck in conversations whereby we're like, we're kind of done with the conversation now. So the way I would do it is to say, like, don't say you go into the toilet if you're not going to the toilet because sometimes you'll get spotted and you're not actually going to the toilet. Or if you go into the bar, you actually generally go into the bar. Just say like, look, I'm. I'm gonna go around and meet some more people. It was really good to chat to you. Can I have your contact Details before we go and we'll connect. And that's a genuine and nice way just to get out of a conversation and then move on. Because it is like you do want to get as. Get around as many people as possible sometimes as well.

Yeah. I find sometimes, like people want my number and I'm, I'm really bad at it because I don't pick up the phone to anyone calling, so I only pick up to my mom. Right. So. So if you try to call me, so people ask my number, I say, okay, it's just you. It's pointless. Right. I'm just not using it. And so it's always a bit awkward. People feel like, oh, I, I don't want to give my number or something. So I tend to go on the LinkedIn and stuff like that. But I. This, this gonna be the most awkward stuff for me. I don't know if you come across this or people.

Yeah.

Specific way they want to push on you. A specific way of contacting you or something.

Oh, okay. Yeah. So I solve that. I've got two numbers, I've got. I've got a personal. I solve that. I've got two numbers, I've got. I've got a personal personal number and then I've got a, a business number. And actually last year I left all the property WhatsApp groups in my personal number and put that in my business number only because I found like my business was. My business life was stretching over too much into my personal life. And I work with a, with a mindset coach every month. And one of the things, the big things for me last year was because I network like so much, it just got like too mentally draining and you've got to protect your peace to be at your best self. Like, I can't be turning up at a networking event and just being like really miserable to the point where I have to act to be like personal number and then I've got a business number. And I've actually lacked like happy and pleasant. Like there was a few scenarios where I felt like I just had to just put a bit of an, a bit of an acting face and I'd still be like, you know, my kind wanting to help people self, but I just, just weren't feeling, being there and I just wanted to leave. So I think protecting your piece is important. If you go in to do lots of networking events.

And you make a good point of. It's very easy to get bogged down with some conversations you finished, but you struggle to leave it so you Know you said at the start when you don't know no one and you tend to go and find the other solo networker and then I see like some people who are new to networking, they, they then take comfort so that other person will take comfort in you.

And then last year I left all the property WhatsApp groups in my personal number and you know, we want to.

Stay with you, you know, or type thing.

Yeah, yeah. So yeah.

How do you deal with those? Funny. You know, how can you help people deal with these interactions, you know, or you know like don't be that guy type thing and come come to networking with a bit of a purpose.

Yes. Yeah, I to, I totally agree and put that in my business number and because I found like my business was, my business life was stretching over too much into my personal. I think the, the more, the more plan of action, the more of a plan of action you have on a networking event, the better out outcome. Right. So life and I work with a, with a mindset coach every month and one of the things that I, I would say is if you're looking to meet a certain someone or gain a certain thing is, is just like, just like tell people like once you've found out what they want and hopefully they should reciprocate that by going oh like what is it you're looking for at this networking event? And you'll find that some people don't sometimes. So if they don't then don't feel afraid obviously to say well actually you know that's brilliant or no, I know what you're looking for now here's what I am looking for. And you can, yeah, I think so have, have a plan of what you're looking to get out of that networking event. And you know, not all the time you, you'll come away successful of, of finding something but if you go back the next time you might do but what you might get out the first time. So for instance, I've come across people before where I've, I've, I've met them pretty much every month at an event and didn't think you know that anything of it, of a QS for instance, that I know what's it these QS's that keep popping up in my life. Another QS guy. And the big things for me last year was because I network like so much. I was looking for investment last year for a flip project and it turns out this guy that I'd been networking with for a while never, never asked for much. It just got like Too mentally draining and you've got me. But when I did in, in my group he messed private messaged me and I, he was the last person I would have thought that would have had you know the full investment for this property. So yeah it's you just, you just never know to have, have that have have a goal of what you're trying to get out and networking really is.

Important and you know on your to.

Protect your piece to be your best self. Like I can't be turning up at a networking event and just being like really miserable to the point where I have to act to be like diagram.

At the start if you go anti clockwise on do you have a way of asking people? Do you have a way of asking people. It's like who, who in the network is looking for the stuff you got? Is it. Or you ask this question or do you position or sit. Because this is really where the power is. Because people tend to think oh what's the point going to this networking event? There's only 40 people you know and I only have time to speak to 10 really. It's how do you unlock the network of a thousand times forty, you know.

Like happy and pleasant. Like there was a few scenarios where I found.

So how do you go anti clockwise on this and what question do you ask that person on the left to introduce you to someone?

So this, this person. Yeah so if, if, if I have a one to one with, with this person on the left when you tend to have one to ones right you have more time to, to speak to them. So it could be 30 minutes sometimes if you have coffees it could be an hour and then you can really hone down on what you're looking for and the types of people and that like be ultra specific as well. And then I guess you say like emphasize the fact like look, if, if you can help me find this person it's going to dramatically change what I'm doing. Like I really you know, would love to be connected with it. Well like I would just have to just put a bit of a bit of an acting face and I'd still be these people and then also be, be genuine about how you're looking to help that person you're chatting to as well and like write it down. So the best networkers I've come across that are similar to what I do. Like when I said I want to meet so and so I can see their mind boggling already going right I know. Oh yes, I'll write that I know who to introduce introduce you to. I know so and so. Oh have you met so and so? No. Okay, I'll introduce them and they'll be writing a list in front of me or emailing themselves and then within like two days, four hours they've introduced me to these, to these people already. So if you actually know people that you can introduce to the, to these contacts then then why not do it? Obviously you know, if, if it's, if they're the type of person that you don't just want to do a cold intro first. Like, like you know, my kind wanting to help people self but I just, just weren't feeling being there and I just wanted to leave. So I think protecting your piece is important. If you go with them to say I've got. I met this guy for a coffee girl gal for a coffee. They they need to meet going to do lots of networking events.

And you make a good point of this person.

Obviously I know you do. This is it okay if I introduce you? And I've to be honest, I've been told off once before because I introduced two people without telling the other person. She's like, she messaged me going next time ask me first. I was like okay, sorry. Yes.

Most people are happy to get introduced anyway, you know.

Yeah yeah just got got quite.

It's very easy to get bogged down with some conversations you finished.

But you know, what advice would you give someone who feels they can't add much the conversation because their level of knowledge is lower than those around them? I would guess for something like that is go back to what I said with you know, you. I guess you, you want to like, do you actually want to contribute to that conversation? I guess just being able to listen but then asking questions. So if, if your knowledge is lower then ask questions like I don't know about like you guys sitting here but I love it when people ask me.

Questions, struggle to leave it. So you know, you said at the.

Start you want because it like on, on like planning or architecture or networking. Of course because you know I'm, I'm happy to give. To give my knowledge. So like if you don't, if you don't know much then ask the questions. Never, never be afraid of asking questions. It's. There's a, there's a quote. I think it was Confucius or something and it was something on the lines of those. Those who ask questions will feel a fool for a minute but those who don't ask questions will be a fool for life. So just remember that like a question that might seem silly. Like someone was scared of asking me that in a networking event. They asked me personally afterwards, what does GDV mean? Like gross domestics something. And I was like, oh, it's gross development value. And he's like, I was afraid to put my hand up because I thought everyone in the room knew what it was. And I was like, you gotta remember.

Guys, you are like, you don't know no one. And you tend to go and. And find the other solo.

And it's with Ivan as well. Like, we all didn't wake up out of bed knowing what we know today, did we? Like you didn't wake up out of bed at 2 years old game and go, I'm gonna start Networker.

And then I see like some people who are new to networking, they property filter.

Now I know how to do deals. Did you.

They didn't take comfort. So that other person will take comfort in you. And then.

Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, I would say if you don't. If you feel that you can't add much to the conversation, that's absolutely fine. I've been in. I've been in so many scenarios and I will keep. I'll actually make sure I'm in more of those scenarios where I don't know anything because I'm there to like, learn. Right. So make, you know, we want to.

Stay with you, you know, or type thing.

Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, sure. Does that saying in I don't know what book it is. Like, you know, make sure you're the. Was it the. I don't want to say dumbest. I think that's the wrong word. But not the smartest person in the room because you could get to learn if you're smartest people in the. If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room. So, yeah, that'd be my advice for that one. And I appreciate that, Paul. Thank you for the kind words on the book. Really appreciate that.

Yeah. I'm surprised you didn't mention it in the. In your talk or presentation. You know, you need to put it somewhere in there. It's quite cool.

Oh, yeah, I appreciate it. Yeah. Okay. Well, if people do go to the end, I did actually write a book.

Do you deal with those? Funny. You know, how can you help people.

Deal with this book on 32? At 32. It was the life lessons that I've learned and a lot of the stuff that I talk about on networking to a degree, some bits are in that and, and how I've gotten From working out of school as a technician to owning half an architect practice and I'm not an architect Shakara. I'm not an architect. I do everything but the architecture but we've got the team interactions you know.

Or you know like don't be that guy type thing and come come to networking with a bit of a purpose.

Yes. Yeah I so I totally agree. I think the, the more, the more plan of action the more of a plan of actor think of it like because people ask me all the time how, how does that work? I'm like well Richard Branson, I don't think he knows how to fly a plane but he owns Virgin Airways, isn't it?

So I don't know what to code. Right Shane, Same thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. You don't.

No, no I can't code one line together.

Exactly. So yeah exact. Exactly that. So that, that's my situation with. With co arch architects like I've never opened CAD to draw a line or anything so it's. Yeah I wouldn't have. Shouldn't you have on a networking event the better outcome. Right. So I don't know where to start to be honest with you. So yeah that's what the book's about. All the life lessons really. And it's 99p digital if you fancy it.

Yeah.

About 20p royalties. Cheers.

Get rich quick scheme. Passive incoming. Exactly.

Well it technically is.

Yeah.

I think someone bought one at 3am last night so. Making money whilst asleep baby.

20 20p overnight.

I I would say is if you're looking to meet a certain.

There you go mate. Life changing is it? I. I had. I think I saw you went quick on the side. Did I see Emma and Hanif at some networking event a few slides ahead?

Oh yeah, yeah yeah let's see if I can find them. I think that. Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that's right.

That's honey from the right. That's you Hemad.

That's at Saji's event.

Yeah yeah yeah yeah it's like the second, the second favorite world is your.

Company'S logo you know and someone or gain a certain thing is is is just like just like tell people Tinder's.

Hoodies came out of. You know I responded to it. You know it's funny right. I love that.

Got another question there.

Yeah yeah Karina is asking do you try to speak to every single person in the room at the event? So you're trying to collect everyone's contact details or do you just advise to talking longer to a Few people. I've seen people doing both. It's a good question.

Yeah, like I find personally for me I've, I, I prefer speaking to people longer and then because it like, because obviously relationship built like once you've found out what they want and hopefully they should reciprocate that by going oh like what is it you're looking for at this networking event? And you'll find that building. Right. Like having a longer term view on it. I've never, I've never got. Some people don't sometimes. So if they don't then don't feel afraid obviously to say well actually just, just like powered it and get as many business cards as possible because I think at the end of the day you're trying to make yourself memorable for the right reason. So I remember this one chat once, he just came up to me went, got a business card and he, I went yeah, no problem. Gave it and he ran off. I didn't, didn't get his name. So he rememberable for me for the wrong reasons. Like I don't know who that was and I didn't get an email from or anything. So that's like how not to do what networking in my opinion. So I think just happy, you know, that's brilliant or no, I know what you're looking for now. Here's what I am looking for. Having better conversations slightly longer, you know, 15 minutes here or there and, and then, but continue to go to this, the same networking events. I mean obviously you do want to go to other networking events but going to the same ones is where relationships get built and it is okay to, to go and speak to the same people. But when you get to, obviously when we, when you and I see each other again at network events, we have a very quick catch up, don't we? Then we're speaking to new people then. So it's cool to have a quick catch up with your friends but it's also important from a business point of view and time point of view is to continue speaking to people that you've never spoken to before. Yeah. And you can, Yeah, I think so have, have a plan of what you're looking to get out of that networking event. And you know, all, not all the time, you, you'll come away awesome.

And then you find, you know like, and then you got the opposite behavior. You got the, the flyers, the, the, the ones who go and distribute their business cards.

Yeah, that was, that was an experience where I went to a chamber of commerce event and like this business development manager Guy like I was chatting to him and within two minutes in fact no it was before I'd even like he asked my name. He was like business card in the face straight away and it was like just a massive turn off and I just, I did, I didn't like successful of finding something but if you go back the next time you might do but what you kit and I'm like you know, you haven't even asked what I do yet and I didn't ask for you might get out the first time so for instance I've come across people before where I've I've business card like I think it's important like don't hand your business card out personally. My, my personal opinion on this one. I never ever hand my business card out unless. Unless people ask for it or unless they've. I've met them pretty much every month at an event and didn't think you know say like I'm, you know I'm looking for an architect for my project. I'll say would you like my contact details? And then oh yes please. And then I will hand my business card out. But that's just, that's just my opinion because I think handing a business card out without, without someone asking for it, I personally think it's a little bit of a turn off but that's just my opinion on that one. Anything of it. A QS for instance that I know. What's it with this qs?

Yeah thanks.

Thanks Shane. Cheers for buying the book. Yeah messes that keep popping up in my life. Another QS guy and you don't realize.

He was on audible. Are you, are you reading? Is it you reading it?

I am indeed. You gotta listen to my annoying Brummy accent for two and a half hours.

Amazing. I didn't realize that's. That's so cool. Yeah, yeah yeah I agree with you. I don't, I don't carry them anymore. Like it's just, it's not really the business card.

I was looking for investment last year for a flip project and thing is.

A bit overrated I think. I think the tip you share about LinkedIn is all you need.

It turns out this guy that I'd been networking with for a while never, never asked for money.

A lot more powerful because then people are in your world and when you post stuff they keep on warming up to the stuff the things you do and LinkedIn is probably the place for it.

But when I did in my group he messaged yeah definitely and I would definitely say an appropriate Question to ask when you want to do the the contact details exchange is to say what is the best way to contact you because like you if you don't want to give out your phone number, that's not the best way. For me it's, it's email or sometimes it's WhatsApp. It depends who I'm talking to really. LinkedIn's good as well. So LinkedIn for me private message me and I. He was the last person I would have thought that would have had even Instagram's a good way to contact me because I'm quite active on there.

Are you, are you going on, you.

Know the full investment for this property? So yeah, it's you just, you just.

To any challenge Shane, you know, like you try to beat your own record or after attending 157 networking event is it and running three of your own events you want to go and speak out of at 100. You know, I don't know what's the, what's the. Have you got any challenge like that?

Never knows. Have, have that have, have a goal of what you chopped like that.

You need me to challenge you?

Yeah, yeah I was gonna say do you want to set one for me for 2026 because we sort of. Yeah, I don't have one. So I, I was, people were egging me on to do like 200 in a year but honestly 157 you're talking. I think I was doing like six a week sometimes At a top tip though guys, if you're ever feeling hungry trying to get out and networking really.

Is important and you know on the.

Other and the cost of living crisis is getting to you go networking events like I, I, I lived off canapes in 2023 like breakfast, lunches, dinners. It was brilliant. I mean I gained a little bit of weight mind which I've lost now but I got fed like full time and I didn't, you know, hardly cooked in 2023. It was brilliant.

Yeah that's quite awesome. Tony's asking diagram at the start if you go anticlockwise on do you have a way of asking people love the fact that you own your architect practice and you're not an architect. What kind of response did you initially have from architect when setting your business up? You partner with an architect within it.

Yeah. So the, the practice was formed in in 2019 and I joined it as a business development.

Way of asking people.

Manager like PAYE employee in November 2022.

And like who, who in the network is looking for the stuff you got.

Is it all you asked My now business partner said to me if you help me grow the business in one year I'll give you 50 of the company and then literally a year I signed the shareholders agreement November 2023 and it like when I did speak to other architects at networking events like even some of like the bigger firms in the city they just found it really weird and like a setup they said like we don't have a business development person but that's not to say it's wrong they just it's just not heard of in architecture you'll have a BD probably for an accountant or a law.

Firm that's ring's question or do you position or sit because this is really where the power is because people tend to think oh what's the point going to this networking event there's only 40 people and I only have time to speak to 10 interesting Shane do you want to scroll back to the page about where you've got the learning the time because if you think you know people think they have nothing to offer but as you say you got a lot of energy connections, time willing to learn and listening and then just out of being a great connector you you help grow this business massively to a point where it really it's how do you unlock the network of a thousand times forty you know you know it's fair for you to have a half of it you know so it's yeah yeah it's maybe yeah Commenting back on the question Ivan had earlier and to everyone who thinks oh well you know I've got nothing to offer and as you said you before that you got free monitoring from a pretty experienced developer a good friend of mine as well on the back of just so how do you go anti clockwise on this and what question do you ask that person on the left to introduce you.

To someone so this person. Yeah so if applying those principles you.

Know so being paid to be mentored what's not great about it?

Yeah yeah 100 it's just like thinking outside the box and I so I had I guess on top of that my the time was I guess also known as sweat equity and that's I put a lot of sweat equity into gain gain half of that business. Yeah yeah yeah and I definitely say so just going on to hardeeps comment the best food the best food I find is at I have awards ceremonies if if I have a one to one with with this person on the left it's like the three course dinners the you can you know you pick up the, the, the ones where they do Indian food. I love Indian food. Or like if you go to, when you tend to have one to ones right you have more time to, to speak to them. So it could be 30 minutes sometimes. If you have coffees it could be an hour and then you can really hone down on what you're looking for and the types of people and that like be ultra specific as well. And then I guess you say like emphasize the fact like look if, if you can help me find this person it's, it's going to dramatically change what I'm doing. Like I really you know would love to be connected with a chamber of commerce do lots of, lots of events for a year's membership. I think it was like 800 quid plus fat and you got access to 200 events and you go down different venues around, around like Birmingham, West Midlands and yeah the food was like top notch. Ah Ming. Yes Ming do good good sandwiches and wedges. Yeah highly recommend that event. That's good food to be fair.

Yeah Ming is good.

Yeah yeah yeah yeah.

It's a really good Birmingham independent event. Tony's asking a question. Having genuine interest in what others do. Get them talking about themselves, their business, their family. There's a lot of principles if you like a bit of a good read and you probably know about the book already. It's how to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. I think there's a whole chapter on remembering people's names. There's a whole chapter on asking open ended questions to get them to speak and you can end up sitting there having people talk, talk to themselves and, and telling you that they've had the best. You are great of a conversionist conversionist. You, you are by the end of it. So it's really good read if you've not read it already.

Yeah, yeah absolutely. Just, just being a good listener can, can already elevate you know where, where you, where you already are asking question, open ended questions and listening. It's, it's really, it's really simple.

Yeah well thanks so much Shane. Do you have any sort of closing sentiment for, for us today? Thanks, thanks a lot for joining us.

Thanks so much. Always been networking talk to these people and then also be, be genuine about how you're looking to help that person you're chatting to as well and like write it down. So the best networkers I've come across that are similar to what I do like when I said I want to meet so and so I Can see their mind boggling already going right I know. Oh yes, I'll write that I know who to introduce. Introduce you to. I know so and so. Oh have you met so and so? No. Okay, I'll introduce them and they'll be writing a list in front of me or emailing themselves and then within like two days, four hours they've introduced me to these, to these people already. So if you actually know people that you can introduce to the, to these contacts then why not do it? Obviously you know, if it's, if they're the type of person that you don't just want to do a cold intro first like check with them to say I've got. I met this guy for a coffee girl gal for a coffee they need to meet.

Always been networking. That's a good one. Well thanks a lot. So what are the. Can you tell us about your. I didn't know you had three. I knew you had the developers network. I knew you had the, the one in the, the games place. What's the third one?

So yeah, Harry's Club is a, is a free event. It's for investors and professionals so it's not specifically for property as a topic but it's, there's lots of property people that go there and it's in Solihull, it's free to attend once a quarter, don't have a date yet. You get fed there as well for free and you get a free drink on arrival. So yeah, just connect with me on, on LinkedIn or WhatsApp, whatever the what was on the QR code, LinkedIn, Instagram and when, when I, when I release the next event then it will be plastered over social media and you know you're welcome to, to attend. Yeah for sure.

Yeah there's only one, there's only one curly ginger chain trainer anyway so you can. Thanks really really appreciate you coming and share this thing. So thank you everyone for joining us on today's dealer corner. I hope you had a good time like I did. I look forward to seeing you next week. In the meantime log on to your Props filter account, you know, check out the blueprint, have an endless supply of deals, join the top 1% and become a high achiever deal finder. I hope you enjoy today this final corner like I did and I look forward to seeing you all next week. Thanks so much. Thank you Shane. Appreciate mate, thanks for the time. Yeah, appreciate it.

Cheers team.

See you. Bye.