Overcoming The Dark Days Of Motherhood

Hey, mama. So what do you do when you just can't do it anymore? And I'm not talking about just, you know, when you have like the temper tantrums or when you just feel exasperated, when you feel overwhelmed. I'm talking about those really dark days when you just feel like, what's the point? I think every mom has had those days and how we tend to respond to them is pretty painful. I'm going to show you what to do in that dark day so it's not so dark. Yeah. You know, motherhood is the most powerful profession in the world. It's the most noble profession in the world. It's. It's the hardest profession in the world. And when a mom just feels overwhelmed, like we, sometimes we have that daily, right, Those overwhelming moments like, oh my gosh, this is so hard. Or you feel like you're not enough or you're, or you're falling behind and you feel the urgency, you feel the stress. I'm not talking about that. I can help you with that. Absolutely. Make sure you search for my mom brain hacks. Those are really powerful in those moments. What I want to help you with, today is the dark day. Those really, really dark days. I don't know about you, but I know I've had several of those dark days. And you really feel like you are at the bottom rung. You feel maybe like, you know, if I was just gone, would anyone even miss me? What's. What's the point? I. My kids would be so much better off with another mom. Like, I know I'm speaking some pretty, like some pretty painful thoughts out there, but I will tell you, a lot of moms, me included, have had those moments. And we have to understand that as a mom, we have mom brain. Now. One of the characteristics of mom brain is we always go to the worst case scenario. It's just the programming in our brain brain that is operating as a protector. Now that worst case scenario helps us to be more cognizant of risk, okay? To keep our kids safe, keep our family safe. But if it's not managed correctly, it can spiral into depression or severe anxiety or what I call those dark days when you just have a day that's like, I, I just, I wish I hadn't even woken up this morning. Like, this is going from bad to worse. Okay. And in our self image and our confidence level, everything just pulled plummets. Those dark days. Now we have to recognize mom brain and hormonal changes that are happening in your body as a mom. So sometimes it's like the perfect storm, right? Our lifestyle sometimes can be crazy. We don't know what to expect. We have unforeseen activities coming up, emergencies coming up. So we have that constant decision making which makes our brain tired. We have hormonal changes in our body and then we have the worst case scenario programming of the mom brain. Now marry all of that with fatigue. Now when I'm talking about fatigue, it's real for moms because sometimes we've been up with a, with a sick baby or we've had to do like a lot of tasks. So I had to get ready for something. I would have to pile stuff on us. We had to stay up late, we had to get up early. So this perfect storm, if it's not managed well, can often result in a very dark day. Now, the way a mom has a tendency to handle the dark days is to sink in it. Now, I know that sounds, it sounds weird to think that there's something gratifying about depression, but there is. Depression is very. It's an indulgent emotion. We don't try to fight it necessarily. It just feels almost like, like the right place to go to if we just sink into it and allow the depression. And when you're really tired, you can't even fight it. So those dark days, those depressing days can happen for a mom. And we have a tendency to sink into it and just allow it. And of course it gets worse and worse and worse and worse. And now we're like, what is the point? Why am I even alive? Okay, I'm going to show you what to do about that. And I think this is going to be really super helpful for everyone out there because if you have not had a dark day, chances are you may have one in the future. I want you to be prepared for that and don't spiral down into it. Don't let your, you know, don't let yourself get drawn into that depression. Instead, I'm going to show you one strategy that I think is going to be very powerful for you. And this actually came out of the bible. So in First Kings, chapter 19, there's a story about a great prophet named Elijah. And Elijah, just man, he was miraculous. He was doing healings and, and all these miracles and, and he was just known for it, right? Well, this one day was especially miraculous. He, like, called down fire from heaven and it burned up this altar. And like, it was like, amazing. It changed a whole nation that day. But in the same day, on the, on the verge, like on the heels of that amazing event, he was suicidal. Now, how can you go from this amazing success to suicidal? It's because sometimes, and especially moms will understand this. We have big events that happen in our life, and we don't feel capable of holding all of that. Sometimes we feel like we're at a limited capacity. And that limited capacity yields depression, overwhelm. And those thoughts of, like, I don't even know why I'm even here. That's where Elijah was. So immediately after he did this amazing miracle, he got word that Jezebel said, I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna come after you now. Okay, it was a threat, right? But he let it get into him. That was the problem. So for moms, I want you to understand the circumstances that you're looking at could be very scary. You could decide to agree with them or just look at it like, this is temporary. You get to decide that. But we need to be built up in such a way that we can look at circumstances. You know, here's something that I can't pay. Here's some really bad news about one of my kids. Here's, like, something tragic, something chaotic, something, like, throw us off. We're like, you know what? I'm just observing. This is temporary, and I'm going to stay in that place where I know God's working things out for me. So when you stay in that place, you can operate more powerfully. Elijah was like, oh, my gosh. He took it to heart. He was. And he ran for his life. And he eventually got to God. He's like, will you just, like, kill me now? Like, he was literally asking God to take his life. So here's the amazing thing. A lot of times when a friend is stressed out or. Or you're stressed out or. Or someone's depressed, you want to, like, hype them up, right? You want to, like, it's not so bad. It's okay. You can do better than that. Doesn't work with the mom brain. They already sink into that depression. So this is what to do when you have that dark day and you can't seem to get out of it. No one can psych you out of it. No one can coach you out of it. There's not enough reality television or TikTok to help you handle it any better. Here's what to do. And we're going to do exactly what God did for Elijah. So the angel of the Lord appeared to Elijah, and here's this amazing sermon that he preached to him. He said, hey, journey's Too great for you? Go eat something and take a nap. Isn't that just like God, to meet us right where we are? So, mom, next time you're having a really dark day, I want you to really think about this. Do I have to be super powerful today? Do I have to be this spiritual giant to today? Do I have to be this warrior woman today? Maybe today is my cheat day. Now, what does that mean? When you're on a diet, when you're doing, you know, a physical transformation, sometimes we'll have a cheat day. What that means is, like, I'm just gonna, like, eat whatever I want that day, and I'm not gonna hold any guilt around it. So when you're having a dark day, I want you to think this. What if I can have an emotional cheat day and literally limit it to that day? Say I'm gonna feel depressed. I'm just gonna hold it. I'm gonna feel all the gross feelings. I. I'm going to cry if I want to. I'm going to yell if I want to. I'm going to just not do anything. I just, like, sink into it. But I'm only doing it today. That way. We're holding this in a temporary pattern. We're not thinking, oh, this is my new life, and life is over, and it's horrible. We're shrinking it down to say, you know what? This day is bad. So don't let a bad day or a bad moment make you think you're a bad mom. Maybe you're just having an emotional cheat day, and it's like, I'm just gonna indulge in. In depression, in anxiety. I'm just gonna feel it all. But I'm giving myself today to feel it. Can you do that for yourself? It's a lot more compassionate than thinking. That's your new reality. It's not your new reality. You just got triggered by something. You just had hormonal changes. Maybe you were too tired. Maybe it was just too much for you. Like. Like God says in his word, the journey's too great for you. And understand this, Mom. Sometimes the journey is too great for you. And that's why you feel the pressure of everything. So remember what God told Elijah to do. Go eat something and take a nap. And guess what? Here's a crazy thing. He ate something, he took a nap, he woke back up. And guess what God told him to do. Go eat something else and go take another nap. So maybe the best advice you could have today is, I'm going to relegate this to just today it's just going to be a dark day. Tomorrow is going to be different, but today is a dark day and I'm just going to eat something. I'm going to take a nap and know that tomorrow I'll be more ready for the journey because today the journey is a little too great for me. Be compassionate and loving with yourself. Mom. You're showing up. You're doing a great job. If you weren't, you wouldn't be watching this video. Okay? I love you. I got you. And make sure you check out. I've got an entire program called recharge for that mom who is feeling like, whoo. I just need. I just need to, like, get a jolt here. I need to get a pick me up. I need to get a recharge so I can continue this journey. I think that's gonna really help you out. I love you. I got your back and you can be a happier mom.