The 7 Princess Wounds: Part 4

You know, let's face it, I don't think anyone out there has had a perfect childhood. And, well, there are some childhoods that were probably a lot less perfect than others. There's some wounds that are created along the way and through the years. And the wound that we're going to talk about today in this series that we're right in the middle of doing Seven Princess Wounds is that wound of rejection. Snow White experienced it, right? And, well, maybe you did, too. Make sure you tune in and listen to this episode and Mom Mastery University. Welcome to Mom Mastery University. The education every mom should have had but didn't. I'm Hannah Keeley, America's number one mom coach. And class is now in session. Hey there, Master Mom. I'm so excited. Excited that we get to hang out together right here at the coolest school on the planet. Mom Master University. Now, if you've been with us a while, you know, we're probably about thigh high in a series called the Seven Princess Wounds. It's basically how to heal from those subconscious wounds that were created in childhood so that we can become the queens that God has created us to be. We've talked about several of these. In fact, this is part four. Now, if you've missed part one, two, and three, go back and watch those or listen to it, but don't do that right now, because I have a feeling that you're here in this time, in this place, because God has led you here. And there might be a reason why you want to tune in to this episode. So stick around with me for a while. This. This one, we're talking about the wound of rejection, and basically, we're looking at Snow White. Okay, ready? Sit back. It's. It's story time. So once upon a time, there was a princess. She was truly the fairest in the land, and none other could come close to her beauty. Inside and out. Her life was splendid until the day her mother died and her father, overwhelmed with grief, decided to marry a woman that was stunningly beautiful but truly evil. One day, the Evil Queen noticed that the princess had grown to be a lovely young woman whose beauty now surpassed that of the Evil Queen. Motivated by rage and jealousy, she ordered the princess to be killed. The princess found out about her evil plan and escaped the castle just in time. Rejected by her own family because of her appearance, she went to live in the woods and learned to survive on her own. With the help of a group of dwarves she stumbled upon. Would the princess ever be accepted by her true family? Would she be able to return to her castle. That's where we are in the middle of this riveting story about this princess who has suffered from rejection. Now, Snow White was suffered. She suffered rejection because basically this woman who was not her mother, had rejected her because she felt threatened by her. So understand this. If you have experienced rejection in your childhood, there's a. There's a high likelihood that maybe you exhibited a quality or characteristic that, that threatened those people who you shared your life with. And maybe it wasn't wrong or flawed or, or, or, I don't know, a mistake. Maybe it was just how you were wired that they just weren't comfortable with. And you know what we do, guys? When we're not comfortable with something, what do we do? We reject it. Right? If we haven't been tuning into Mom Master University and done all that, you know, work around our mind and our mom brain, then typically we'll reject those things that we don't feel comfortable with. So we're going to go into the series understanding that those people who rejected us, first of all, it was our perception they may not have really rejected us. We could have perceived it as rejection. Maybe they didn't realize that that's how it was coming across. But we perceived it because we're children and we had a child brain. We perceive that as rejection. And so we're gonna move into this understanding that they just showed up the best they could, how they were programmed, Maybe they weren't comfortable, maybe it was threatening, maybe it was unfamiliar and that's why it came across as rejection. So it's like, okay, you're rejected out of this family because we just can't accept that. So whether it was conscious, unconscious, it was very evident. Maybe it was kind of hidden. Whatever it is, whether it's going to go on and understand that your childhood brain processed it as I am rejected. Now, this is the experience and exposure. This is the first thing we're going to talk about, is experience and exposure. Every belief we hold comes from experience, which is what we personally experienced in our life, or exposure. What we experience vicariously through the messaging and the relationships of the people that we grew up with, our atmosphere. So in this wound of rejection, the Snow White wound is where you're not accepted by those people who you live with, who kind of have this obligatory position in your life of acceptance, of nurturing. Maybe you weren't nurtured, maybe you weren't edified. Maybe it's just like flat out rejected. Whatever it is, your parents, caregivers, your peers, There was a group or, or a person or people who rejected you and that actually leads to you not accepting yourself. So when people don't accept you as a child, here's what you learn. I'm flawed. Something is wrong with me, I'm a mistake. And therefore that it perpetuates into this feeling of self, self loathing. There's so much I don't like about myself. Like you can make a mile long list all the things you don't like, but this is the experience, right? There's this need that every child has, actually every single one of us, no matter what age. There's this need we have for approval, for recognition, for validation. And with this wound of rejection, you don't receive that you're rejected, you're turned away. Now our challenge becomes how do we cultivate self love? Because self love is the opposite of self loathing, right? That self loathing is I'm so, something so wrong with me. Maybe it was that you weren't like the rest of your family, right? Maybe it was that you made choices that didn't align with their choices, so they rejected you. And maybe you just observed this kind of rejection energy in your life as, as a child. Now what happens when you grow up with this type of wound, with this rejection? Well, we're going to move into that core belief. That core belief that is created out of this wound of rejection is I'm flawed. Now I want you to think about if this may be something you're going through, how does that show up in my life? I'm flawed. There's something wrong with me, I'm a mistake. Maybe it shows up as unworthiness, not enough. Always like a very critical spirit. A lot of times when you have this wind of rejection and it does show up as a critical spirit, you start to criticize those very things that you don't like about yourself. You start criticizing that in other people to kind of validate those emotions in you. And something's always wrong with you. You can make a list of mile long something's always wrong. Either either your body, something's wrong with your body, something's wrong with your relationship, something's wrong with your home, your money, your job, your car. It's like your mind immediately gravitates toward finding evidence that supports you are flawed and you live a flawed life. Because if you have this root belief that I'm flawed, then everything in your life is going to be flawed as well, right? Okay. So this core belief, let's, let's break it down because everything that we do inside Mom Master University, inside my coaching, inside the Covenant Coach Academy where we train up life coaches, it all comes down to, to the formula, the faith formula. Now if you are new here, I'm going to briefly describe what that is. And it's so simple, which is everything in God's kingdom, right? God did not make anything hard that he also tells us, make this a part of your life. Because he said, take my yoke upon you. My yoke is easy, it gives you rest. So why would he make it hard to live that abundant life that he came to give us, right? He doesn't make it hard. So we have to think, if I'm making it hard, maybe I'm putting my human effort into something that should be just natural because the Holy Spirit lives in me. So here's this natural formula that is so simple that you really need a, need a like high level degree to complicate it, right? And it goes like this. You ready for this? I think something which makes me feel, something which makes me do something, which makes me have something so really quickly. Let's think about it. I think a thought, something comes to my mind and then that creates a feeling in my body. I have this feeling and then out of that feeling, I'm probably going to respond to that feeling and do something. Now that behavior will always give me a result which will start to become my circumstances that I live with. So in understanding the faith formula, which is lined out in the Bible, Romans 12, 2, right? We are not supposed to conform to the pattern of this world, but we're supposed to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. How do we renew our mind? We go back to the root, which is those thoughts. It all starts with a thought. I want you to think about that. Say it to yourself. Everything starts with a thought. Everything good or bad in your life, all your circumstances, it all started with a thought. So this thought yields to a feeling which results in an action which now you have something as a result. Okay, now understanding this is called the faith formula. Grounded and rooted in scripture. Let's look at what this looks like with this wound of rejection. First of all, what is the thought, the core belief? I'm flawed. That's the core belief that you develop when you experience rejection in your life. Now how does I'm flawed feel? Well, think about it. It feels kind of, kind of tight. Like you're super critical. Like you're always gonna like do something or mess up something. And so you have this like critical energy, this Critical vibration over every characteristic of, of your life and every decision you make and, and every result that you get in life, there's going to be this, like, critical energy over all of that. Always trying to, like, measuring yourself. I mean, you know what I'm talking about. Like, like everything's. You got to be super careful. You got to be super measured. Also. Think about this. I'm flawed has a retractive energy. So some energy is very expansive, right? It makes you, like, expand your energy. You fill up a room. You have this vibrant nature. Think about it. I'm flawed results in a retractive energy because you want to hide those flavors, flaws. When you suffer from rejection and you get this core belief that I'm flawed, you're always going to try to either try to compensate for your flaws or hide from your flaws. Make sure you get that. You're going to do either I'm going to compensate for my flaws or I'm going to hide my flaws. So that hiding energy, the compensation energy, is that kind of strong vibration. I got to measure up. I got to make sure everything's okay. That hiding energy, that's that retractive energy. I have to hide myself. So it makes you pull away. It makes you pull away from people. It makes you pull away from opportunities, right? It's always coming up now. How else does it feel? Well, it feels like things could potentially go wrong because I'm wrong. Something about me is flawed. I'm wrong. So things could go wrong. So there's like this anticipatory anxiety, like, what. What's going to explode next? What wrong thing is going to happen next? What, When's the other shoe gonna fall? Like, that kind of energy, like, I know something bad's gonna happen. Like, I always want to be prepared for it. Also feeling that sense of I'm flawed is a complete, like, attack on your identity in Christ. Now think about it. God did not. God didn't give you that energy. Jesus actually came to restore that perception of yourself and make you whole. So it is a direct attack. Rejection is used by the enemy to be direct attack on your identity. So how does this feel? A lot of times you feel it in your core. So you can either feel it like back pain or you can either feel it like gut pain, but either way, it's attacking your identity. Your, your gut, where you process information. Your. Your back, where you hold it. So you can sometimes experience. If you've gone through this wound of rejection, you can sometimes experience intense back pain and pain in your gut also. This is a way of like where your base is. And if you have insecurity around your identity, sometimes that formulates around your. I mean that. That forms around your base, which is your feet. Sometimes you'll have foot problems. Sometimes you'll have problems. Project with your feet or walking or balance issues. So just think about. Are any of these coming up? There may be a correlation here, not necessarily a cause. I'm just saying frequently this is how you see this core belief show up in your body. Now what does this feeling I'm. You know, this feeling of tightness, like retractive, hiding, measuring yourself. What does it cause you to do? Well, think about it. Your actions. First of all, you criticize. You criticize the things you feel most insecure about. Do you ever notice that you're always looking for something wrong? Wrong in others, wrong with. Wrong in institutions, wrong with something wrong with a political party, something wrong here, there. You're. That critical spirit could come from the insecurity of you feeling rejection as well. Now here's some other things you could potentially do. Compulsion. Did I say that right? Compulsion. Buying, Buying on impulse or compulsive spending. Now you all. Now things you spend money on are things that you think will correct your life, fill the gaps and cover the flaws. Think about what you spend money on. Are they things you think, oh, this will make me feel, feel or look or be perceived as less flawed, even though that whole flaw thing is a lie, right? But it's just how your feelings, how you're processing information. Also you make friends with people who really don't challenge you. Like who did? And again, the dwarves were representing. Here's Snow White. She's escaping. She's rejected, runs away. So she makes friends with people like, look, they were less instinct. Stature. Now I know it was like pictorially represented as the Seven Dwarves, right? But what it really showed us, I'm going to gravitate to people who might be lower, less stature, less threatening, right? They don't challenge me. So you're going to gravitate to befriending those people who really don't challenge you to become your best. You're kind of like, you know, the, the. The big pig in the trough, right? Like you're the. You're the. You're probably the most developed of all of them, right? Because you gravitate to people who are making you feel more secure about your perceived flaws as an individual. You also jump around typically from one project to another. Now because the completion of a product requires you to feel worthy enough to do it. I want you to think about that. The completion of a project, a product, I mean, a project is reliant upon you feeling worthy enough to complete it. Now, if you feel flawed, if you think there's something wrong with you, you definitely don't feel worthy. So you'll start doing something, you'll start going down a road and you're like, well, only like achievers finish it. Only like successful people finish it. And all of a sudden all the flaws will come up and you'll probably distract yourself from completing the thing. Not because you lack willpower or not because you don't have focus problems or not because you don't have time. It's because you don't fit the perception of the person who is a completer. You think you're flawed. So you will continue to operate with behaviors that back up this self perception of I'm flawed. Any of this making sense to you? I hope it is. I hope it is. Okay. Also, you don't get too, you don't get too close to people. You, you're not very authentic or raw. It's very, very hard for you to be vulnerable, right? Because when you're vulnerable, you see all the flaws, right? It's kind of like if you're going to be intimate with someone, your spouse, if you're going to be intimate with your spouse, some people are like, turn all the lights off. I don't want you to see all the flaws, right? You, you want to hide. But when the lights are on and you're, and you're like totally exposed and you're vulnerable, you see all the flaws. And so this makes you not want to get too close to people because they're going to see the real you, which you think is just flawed. How many times can I say flaw in one, in one coaching session? Also, I want you to think about this. You probably have a tendency to collect pets. Now why is this? Can pets reject you? No. You can be the worst piece of poop on the planet. Like laying around doing nothing. How's the wreck? Watching TV all day. You don't give a, a poot about anyone. And guess what? Those dogs, those cats, they just love you, Love you, love you. Well, I don't know about cats, but okay, I'm just not a cat person. But I know cats are great you, but they don't reject you. Like, they accept you just as you are. And so you have a tendency to like, you probably, like, follow a lot of like, pet accounts or maybe like, are like rescue Animals or that kind of stuff. Not that that's like, oh, you must be flawed because you rescue animals. No, that's just a compassionate expression. Sometimes, just sometimes it has its roots in I, I don't feel like I can accept myself. That's all I'm saying. So I'm not saying, oh, you collect a lot of dogs. You must not be able to accept yourself. No, absolutely not. Remember, it's not causality and it's not 100 correlation. It's just sometimes you see these characteristics, that's all. Now would you, when you do these behaviors, what do you have? Typically you have too much stuff. Honestly, it comes down to that too. Too much stuff. Because you're trying to fill in gaps that you see in your own life. Also, you don't really have a support network for your growth and your success. You have a support network for like griping and groeded, but you don't have a support network in place to actually hit your goals and push you forward, which is again, shameless. Plug right about mom Mass University, elite. Like that is next level when you can decide. Mom, Master, university and choosing elite level. Because man, those women, like, we push each other. We meet every single week. We are pushing each other. We're doing that live coaching. Like, and if you do have this in you and if you do think you're incomplete, guess what? This is what's going to push you out of it so you can come to terms with it. So you really do need that group of. I call them instead of girlfriends, I call them goldfriends. Like they're those friends who are like, no, let's make sure you reach your goals. I want to support you in this. Also, sometimes you just have too many obligations. You'll fill up your calendar and fill up your energy so that you're not left alone with yourself. Because what happens when you're left alone with yourself if you have not healed from this wound of rejection is you'll have all the internal dialogue, which is a self loathing, all the ways you're wrong, all the ways you screw up, all the ways you mess up. And it just, it's almost like it's this low roar. Like you don't even consciously hear it any longer. It's just always playing in the background. So one last thing that you have is your flawed characteristics often get incorporated into your identity. You kind of create your identity around it. Oh, well, I have this or will I just do this? Well, this is, this is my, this is my mess up. Like I'M characterized by that. You characterize it in your head. So then you like, present your identity as flawed. You might take on labels that reveal things about you that you think you hold flaws in that area. Okay, so we've gone through the faith formula of what it looks like when you have this wound of rejection, right? The snow white wound. Now, first we have to, before we can move forward, we have to elegantly blame it, right? This is based upon Romans 8:28. All things work together for good. So if we have been rejected and if we hold this feeling like something's wrong with me, I'm flawed, guess what? There's a good side to everything, all right? Just like this piece of paper here, there is a good side to everything. There's. There's one side and you flip it and there's the other side. So we, we can talk about, oh, this is all the ways that screwed me up, or everything that's wrong, let's flip it. And also look at all the things that are right I. About this wound, all the, all the ways that God could have used it. Maybe you've become just a really more compassionate person. Maybe focusing on the flaws has caused you to try to intentionally take measures to improve yourself, right? Maybe it was a. Maybe this right now is just a good starting point and God has you here so you can learn for maybe the first time ever how to really love and accept yourself. And you wouldn't have potentially ever sought that out if you hadn't felt rejected, right? So God always has this beautiful way of bringing treasure out of trash. So we can like stay in the trash or we can say, wait, wait, you know what? God works all things out for good. So I know, like, even though this was my story, I can write a new one. I can write a new one starting right now. So that's that elegant blaming. Now the fifth step. No. So this is where we are right now. And hopefully you have the book and you're doing the extra work. That's all inside my master University. So if you have not enrolled in Mom Master University, guys, you can get it for like a buck. Like, seriously, take it. Take just a trial month, get inside, get the workbook, do the extended work that we do inside the university around each one of these coaching sessions. So in the workbook, you'll notice that this is a seven step process. Now we just did four, which is elegant blaming, and now we're at five, which is forgiveness. Forgiveness is not something we feel. I've talked about this before in the other training Sessions. But I feel like I have to mention it again. It's not something we feel, it's something we do. So if you'll notice in the book, there's a beautiful prayer that you can pray if you want to intentionally. Like right now, I'm going to forgive all those people or the situations where I felt rejected like that. Forgiveness is the cleansing power that now can set the stage for healing. You cannot heal completely without forgiveness. So make sure you look in the book and follow along. And there's a beautiful prayer that you can even date it, right? So when your feelings come back up again, you can look back and say, no. On this day right here, I signed it, I prayed this prayer, and I forgave. Even though I feel frustrated or resentful or angry, I know I did that. So now I can just continue to remind myself, no, that's done. That's done. I have forgiven and I have set free. So make sure you go do that now. Step six. This is the lie to truth bridge. This is where we take the lie that the princess has believed and we take the new truth that the queen holds. Because you can't become a queen while you're still, like, wounded as a princess, we need to do the healing power to become that queen. So this is where we cross over and why I call it the bridge is it's not instantaneous. Now, sometimes it can be instantaneous, but usually it's a process. And we're going to go from the lie to the truth and continue to massage that into our psyche so it can. We can now embody that energy. So the lie. We know what the lie is. I'm flawed. But what is the truth? Let's think about this. What could the truth be? Now, you might say I'm not flawed, but that's really not true because that we all are flawed. We all have sin, right? We. We all have, like, some mistakes that we've done. And so we. That really doesn't hold true. So we can try to say, no, I'm perfect. It's like. That doesn't feel like you can really, like, gel there. Okay, So I want to offer something. I'm flawed is based, grounded, and rooted in this sin consciousness where I'm more conscious of my sin than I am of God's grace. So this bridge, we're going to take this bridge and we're going to go from sin consciousness to grace consciousness. Sin is everything we did wrong. Grace is everything God does, right? So now we're going to cross this bridge and we're going to turn our sin consciousness into grace consciousness to realize I'm flawed. But guess what? In in Jesus I'm righteous. So. So as always, we're going to go to God's word to establish what that truth is. Because truth has to come from the truth we live has to come from that capital truth which is God's word. So I'm going to read to you 2nd Corinthians 5, 20, 21. So we are Christ's ambassadors. Just that. I know I don't have the time, but just that maybe I'll go more into it in the extended work. I'll do that. God making his appeal, as it were, through us. We as Christ's personal representatives beg you for his sake to lay hold of the divine favor. That's his grace, divine favor that we never can earn, we never can deserve. It's just his divine favor, that divine favor now offered you and be reconciled to God for our sake. He made Christ virtually to be sin who knew no sin, so that in and through him we might become endued with, viewed as being in and examples of the righteousness of God. I'm going to break this down what we ought to be approved and acceptable in a right relationship with him by his goodness. So here's the opposite of being flawed is being approved, acceptable and in right relationship. Now how do we get that? It says by his goodness. So this gets us out of I need to fix my life and I need to make sure I'm okay and I need to fill in all the gaps and to what if I can be broken and what if my flaws can actually be present but because of the One who lives in me, the One who dwells in me and his goodness now makes me righteous. So if you look at the King James version of this says that we are made the righteousness of God. In Christ Jesus you are literally the righteousness of God not because you're not flesh flawed, but because Jesus is not flawed. Do you see that? So now it takes the eyes off of I need to make my life okay and I need to correct myself and I need to hide my flaws too. Wait, I can be open, broken, vulnerable because of Jesus and his goodness in me, living through me. Now I can present myself as righteous. Now let's put this into the new faith formula. Okay, we're going to wrap this up really quick. The new faith formula. And again we do a lot more extended work inside Mom Master University. So the thought is we think I'm righteous. I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. I'm okay. I'm sufficient. I'm enough, and I'm loved. It's because of his love that his grace can now be inexhaustibly expressed through us. There's no end to his grace. There's no end to his love. So now we don't have to focus on the flaws. We can focus on his grace. So how does that feel? Oh, my gosh. It. The feeling you get from that thought, I'm loved. I'm. I'm the righteousness of God. I'm. I'm enough. I'm sufficient. What does it say here in the Bible in the amplified, I'm approved. I'm acceptable. I'm in right relationship with him now. How does this feel? Well, think about it. It feels like you're the best word I could come up with it when I was doing these notes is covered. It's like a love blanket. I'm covered. I'm not lacking anymore. I'm not desperately trying to fill my gaps or hide my flaws. I'm covered. You feel stable. You feel secure. What does this make you do? Well, it makes you slow down. You're not that. That desperate energy anymore. You don't have that critical spirit anymore. Finding everything that's wrong. You're focusing now more on the things that are right. Look at. Look at how God's showing up in me. You're able to show up. This is a beautiful quality. You're able to show up more authentically with people. You don't have to hide yourself or be someone that you're not. And what do you have as a result? You have better relationships. You can start to, like, weed your friendship garden. Like, like, sorry, dopey, you ain't gonna make it anymore. Like, get out of here. Like, it's time to weed the friendship garden and find those people who now can see you authentically for who God has designed you to be. Right. You also have less clutter in your life because you don't have to keep so much stuff to make you feel that you're okay. Now, we're going to wrap this up by finishing the story. Okay? Are you ready for this story time again? Put down the poison apple, princess. You've been feasting on these lies long enough. These lies telling you that you're flawed, you're unworthy, you're the problem. All lies. And you ate them up. But no longer. It's time to feast on the truth. Your king made you perfect, and there was no flaw in that design. Now rise up in righteousness and take your place. You were made to reign in power, not grovel in rejection. Only then will you become the queen you are destined to be and live happily ever after. I am so excited that you have joined me inside Mom Master University. Now, if you're already a Master mom, if you're already enrolled in Mom Master University, make sure we follow this up all the time by doing the work. So make sure you print out that workbook and. And make sure you either listen to or watch the extended work so that we go in here and actually do the work. Make the change, get the results. It's not enough to hear, right, because hearing is in there so that it can come out in the doing. So now is time to do the work. So make sure you get plugged into that. And if you are not inside Mom Master University, do not go to bed tonight. But without enrolling, we have a free dollar trial that we just started. You can actually go there, get a dollar trial, and try it out for 30 days. I mean, I'm like that. I don't want to go to the store and buy some jeans till I try them on and make sure I like them. So get inside, try it out, get to know the sisters inside our sorority, and I guarantee you're going to be blessed like crazy. So what about you, Mama? Are you ready to enroll in the only school that will not only change your life, but also your legacy? Go to Mom Mastery University, where we dive deep into the biblical principles that give ordinary moms extraordinary results. Get enrolled today.