The RAW Truth: How Hristina Destroyed 40lbs of Food Shame in Just 3 Months

Hi everyone, I'm Jessica Lawson. Here we have Christina, who just finished the program, just finished her 3 months. And so she's going to walk us through her experience of the program. I'm going to ask her some questions too. Had an amazing transformation. So you want to just start me— start by walking me through your health journey. So like, tell us, like, who are you? You know, who are you? What has your life been like so far?

My name is Christina. I am I'm 38 years old. I live in Austria. I am a mom of a very beautiful daughter. I had excess weight from 35 kilos since 4 years due to my depression and anxiety, and I I put on the weight from the medication treatment that I took, and I couldn't move it off. I couldn't shake it off. I couldn't keep it off. So I found Jessica on TikTok. I was very, very inspired from her TikTok videos. I loved her from the very beginning, and I was not sure about my weight loss surgery until the end of May. But in the moment that I knew that I was able to have surgery and I was able to schedule my surgery, I was sure that I wanted to work with her.

Oh, thank you. Really quick, I'm going to pause you there. I'm curious, how many years exactly had your weight been an issue for you or been a struggle? And when you say that you hadn't been able to keep it off or lose it, what all did you try before having surgery?

It was 4 very difficult years. Uh, I tried diet, I tried exercise, I tried, um, not eating at all. I was also in that phase, um, without success.

Got it.

Um, and, um, I always— my, my biggest problem was sweet. And I always, uh, went back to them because, um, now I know they were my comfort food. Hmm.

Gotcha. And what was the impact of your weight, of the comfort food, et cetera, like on your life?

Um, it, it was a very bad experience. Because I couldn't do any sports. I couldn't ride a bike with my daughter. I was ashamed of myself all the time. I wouldn't let anybody take a photo of me for like 4 years. Just seeing myself like that, it was very depressing, and I sincerely hated myself for that for a long time.

Yeah, I think that's something a lot of people can relate to, right? It's like looking in the mirror and not seeing who you feel like you are, right? Because of the weight, because of, because of all that. And so right now it's January. You said you started thinking about surgery in May, so that was what, 8 months ago. And then you had the surgery in October, right? November. Oh, yeah. Sorry. November 2nd. Yes, that's right. But I remember at first we were going to have it in October and then. Yeah. So what was the point that you decided you needed to make a change?

When I started work on April 1st. Last year, uh, because, uh, my work requires, requires me to be in a good shape, both mentally and both physically.

Okay, got it.

And that was the point when I said, okay, uh, I cannot go like this anymore, and I, and I don't want to go like this anymore. I don't want to do it. I just don't. And surgery was on my mind for like 3 years now. And I was very happy at the end of May when I said that, okay, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. I don't care. What, what anybody else says. Um, I had, uh, I had the psychiatrist who I was going to monthly and the psychologist, and both told me it was a bad idea. And I said, this is my body, this is my mind, and You are not telling me what to do.

How'd that make you feel?

At first, scared like hell. But, um, but then after, after I made, after I made the decision, uh, I knew I needed help from, uh, from somebody like you who went through this, who, uh, was in the same, uh, situation that I was and could understand my situation better. And that's why, um, I was so aiming to, to work with you.

I think a lot of people think that the surgery is going to fix all their problems.

Yes.

And it's, and it sounds like you haven't said this yet, but it sounds like you knew that that was not gonna be the case, right? Otherwise you wouldn't have sought out help, right? Like you, you literally just said, I knew I needed help. So, so I guess my question for you is why did you think you needed help and what did you think you needed help on at the time?

Um, I was sure that I needed help because, like you said, for me it was clear from day one when I, when I made the decision to have the surgery that, uh, this is a very unfamiliar territory for me. And I'm a nurse and I needed somebody who was familiar on this territory to walk me through it. And, um, I, I said, it does— it doesn't matter how much it costs. I, I don't care. Uh, I only I only really need somebody who is there for me on this journey, who can, who can understand everything that I am going through. Because I knew that I would, if, if I don't have anybody, that I'm, when I'm doing this on my own, I'm gonna be scared and I'm gonna have anxiety. And then in this moment when I have anxiety, I always turn to comfort food. So that was my, my big problem.

I think a lot of people too are scared to ask for help. And you being a mom as well, I know something that like you and I have talked a lot about is prioritizing yourself. So, so tell me more too about how, you know, was it scary to ask for help or like You know, how, how, how was your weight affecting your, your relationships, your ability to be a mom and prioritize yourself too?

Um, asking for help, it was not difficult for me.

Okay.

It was not difficult for me because, um, I, I was already in that situation when I, I needed to ask for help. So it was not the first time for me. It was the first time for that, for the surgery and for my weight and everything. But thank God it was not the first time in my life when I said, okay, I am not managing this. I need help. And yes, being a mom taught me that I not only have to be responsible for my daughter, I have to be responsible for myself at first. Because when I am okay and I am happy and I am healthy, I can raise my daughter better than to be depressed, anxious, and laying bad all day.

Yeah, you can't take care of other people unless you take care of yourself first.

Yeah, yeah. So first thing that I learned from you, from the first, from our first conversation.

Yeah, because it's true, right? I, I talk to so many women, so a lot of moms, a lot of moms that put everyone before themselves. Right. And that's one of the reasons why they gained the weight in the first place. So, you know, it happens over and over. And so how exactly did you find me? I know you said TikTok, but was there like a particular video, if you happen to remember, or— I'm just curious.

I was— I was searching for surgery. Because so surgery reviews and surgery experiences. And that's how I found you.

Okay, got it. And then what actually led you to want to reach out?

Because I found your videos very professional.

No, thank you.

And, um, I really liked your thinking and I really, really loved your methods. Uh, and, uh, and I said, this is what I need to, uh, to succeed at this. Hmm.

And what is it that you thought you needed to succeed at the time?

At the time, I remember I was very scared of the surgery, very, very scared of the surgery. And in that moment when we started talking and we started working together and you said, "I'm going to be there for you," that was the moment when I said, "Okay, I'm not afraid anymore." I'm not, I'm not scared anymore because, um, I was like very scared of backing, backing off from it.

Yeah.

Because it happens a lot of times because I, I did my surgery in Turkey and everyone was like, okay, okay, Turkey, are you sure? 'Are you sure?' And I said, 'Yes, I'm positive.' And, um, it was, um, it was a very unique experience, and I don't regret it.

Awesome. Great. And so we met like 2, 3 weeks before your surgery.

Yeah.

And What were some of like the first things that we did?

Um, the first things, uh, it was, um, that you, uh, suggested to me to start drinking my water.

Yeah.

And it was drinking my water and, uh, logging into Trainerize. This was that, uh, that was so cool for me. That was something new and, and I found it so, so super. And you were so, so supportive with my water drinking, and I felt so good. And, um, you were— you, you put me, uh, on the path, uh, where, where I always wanted to be mentally, uh, because with you It was not only that how much weight did I lose, or it was not just the physical things. We worked together a lot on my mental health. And that was, I think, and I feel that it helped a lot.

Yeah, for sure. And so one of the first things we did was the Bariatric Blueprint.

Yeah. Right.

So, so tell me, tell me your initial thoughts about that because I think a lot of people get really overwhelmed with it, right? Like, I create this, this giant document.

Yeah, it was overwhelming. Yeah, but I'm not lying, it was. Yeah, of course, uh, because, you know, uh, you, um, you went through, uh, my, uh, my habits, and they were catastrophic. And, um, and that was the point that where the blueprint really, really helped to see where going wrong, it's not, it's not the good experience.

Redesigning your life.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Um, and so what were the main challenges that you faced right after surgery?

My biggest challenge was drinking water. Yeah, that was for me, I don't know, it was, it was It was really that, that was my biggest challenge. That was my biggest challenge. I think the truth is that you helped me improve my mindset so much until after surgery that I was not taking everything so— that every moment, I didn't take it as a catastrophic thing or every challenge is what It was not like, oh God, I can't do it. No, I am trying. I am trying 1% every day. It was, it was so much help.

Yeah.

That I, I felt confident even though, even though sometimes, yeah, it was hard because the first, for me, it was the first week that it was, it was very hard until my brain settle down from the eating, from wanting to eat everything. It doesn't matter what, everything. And I remember in particular that Sunday when I felt really, really hungry and I told you that I ate the tomato soup. And that's, that was my first huge bridge, which you helped me through to make the difference between the emotional hunger and the physical hunger.

Yeah, for sure. And, and how did the challenges that you faced, like, how did these affect your confidence and your ability to stay consistent?

Um, it, it didn't tore me down. It didn't, it didn't tore me down. It, uh, it more, it was giving more like a kick. Um, and I was, I was confident because I knew that if I if I have a challenge and I, um, if I cannot do it alone, that I always, I can always reach out to you.

Yeah, awesome. And then did you have any specific like habits or patterns that you were struggling to break?

Um, after the surgery, that old habits, um, diminished like Really fast.

And, um, which old habits specifically?

Um, sweets, the eating sweets. Okay. Because that, that was, that was my, my biggest problem and my, my worst habit. Um, it diminished because, um, I, uh, I was lucky that I learned the STOP Framework. From you, and that helped a lot, a lot.

And what exactly is a STOP Framework for those that don't know?

Um, I used it, um, like I stopped, um, I, I acknowledged the challenge, I acknowledged the bad habit, I acknowledged the bad habit, and I, I said to myself, okay, this is, this is normal. This is— I, I cannot kick it from one day to another, but I search for a coping mechanism.

Yeah, amazing. And then when you initially joined the coaching program, like, what were you hoping to achieve?

Exactly this what I achieved.

Oh yeah, what is that? What is that?

Exactly. Um, to, uh, to get my old self back. Hmm. To get my old self back. That, that was, that was my main goal.

Did you know that though when you started?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That, that, that was, that was the thing that I was 100% sensational.

And what would you describe as your old self?

My old self, uh, who's happy, who's not depressed, who can go skating with her daughter, who doesn't stuff herself all the time with comfort food, who stands up for herself now.

Yeah.

And, uh, who's taking care of herself now.

Awesome. And then how soon after starting the program did you begin noticing positive changes, like both physically and mentally?

Um, um, in the first week.

Okay, awesome.

What specifically from the first week? In the first week Because we were talking and you— I specifically remember this day. We had our coaching call on Friday and on Saturday I needed to take a long ride with the car and I had my wallet there and I was fantasizing. It was the first time I was fantasizing about after surgery journey. And for the first time, I said, and I was thinking, my God, I can do this.

And you did.

And this is what I thank you so much. That you, you gave me that confidence.

Well, I can talk till I'm blue in my face, but you have to actually do the work, right? So yeah, you also did the work too. So what were some of the aha moments or breakthroughs that you experienced?

Um, the first aha moment, it was, um, It was right after surgery where I was in pain. I was in a lot of pain. And the first thing I was okay, the first thing that I was thinking, "Oh my God, why did I do this? Why did I do this?" And then it came what would just say now? And Jess would say, have patience, have patience. And I literally heard you, have patience, it's gonna go away. And it went away, and it went away. Um, the second one was, uh, when I, when I came home And, uh, you were, you were so supportive in that, in that week when I, I was, I was really scared of, of, of being alone, uh, and, um, and, uh, I was facing, I was facing challenges at home, and you were so, so supportive and so understanding. So Uh, that, that was when I realized, um, that you, you gave me so much, so much power that I, I was able to face all of that. Yeah.

How about any aha moments or breakthroughs on like the cravings, emotional eating, like food noise side? Were there any there?

Um, thank God, uh, those things, uh, went away in the first week after surgery yet, um, because, um, of course I changed my mindset a lot, uh, in that first week, and, um, I think that that was, that was the, the biggest breakthrough. That the, the food cravings, the cigarette cravings, the, I don't know, the junk food cravings just went away. I, I think I was, I was a lucky one that I, I didn't have any more of those anymore.

Gotcha. Are there any specific wins or results that you're especially proud of?

Um, yes. Um, yes. Uh, StairMaster. Oh yeah, yeah, StairMaster. I can do the StairMaster now. So that's, I think for me, for me, that's, that's the highlight of January.

Well, I think as well, like, you really found a love for exercise. And movement too, right?

I love moving now. I love it. I love it. I love exercising now because I'm not dying there.

Yeah, for sure. And then what role would like the coaching calls, the accountability and support play in keeping you motivated?

It helped a lot with my consistency. Um, and, um, I, I loved it. I loved it. I love, I love to work with you because every, every week, um, was a new opportunity. And, um, you were so understanding, uh, when, when I didn't have, when I didn't have the perfect week, and that gave me a very, very kick at my self-esteem.

Gotcha. And then what tools or techniques from the program do you think were like the most helpful?

Um, in the beginning, uh, I loved, uh, learning from the Bariatric Academy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think, um, that those are the, um, the main pillars from, from, uh, from this journey, which helped me a lot, a lot. And I, and I suggest to everybody who enters this program to work with them, uh, because It's, uh, it helps you enormous.

You really dove into the modules. Like the first 2 weeks you're like, Jessica, I'm, I'm like done with module 4 out of 10. And I was, I remember being shocked. Like you, you dove in. Why was that?

Um, I changed, um, my mindset from, um, not wanting to learn into I want to learn and I want to improve. Because, um, I remember Module 4, uh, in the beginning when I had to frame my new self and I had to frame my old self. Yeah, and I, I love that because that, that helped me a lot. To know where I don't want to go back, and it helped me where I want to go.

Yeah. Well, I think one thing that's made you really successful is so many people think this journey is about losing weight. And yeah, that's part of it, right? That's, that's the byproduct and, and obviously a big reason why we do it, right? But I think What, what really struck me really early on about you was that you— and you, you already said it in this, in this video— is, um, you want to get back to your old self. And you very clearly understood that this journey was about becoming a new version of you, right? A higher version, a better version, the version that you've always wanted to be but maybe not have gotten a chance to be. Right. And so, you know, I'm curious, like, were there any, aside from that lesson, like, were there any other modules or exercises that really resonated deeply with you?

Um, no, it was, it was only the module 4, which, which gave me, which gave me a huge kick.

Got it. And now, do you feel better— excuse me, do you feel better prepared to handle like setbacks or challenges that come your way?

Of course. Of course. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. Definitely. Definitely. 100%.

Why is that?

Because I learned a lot. I learned a lot about myself. And And I learned a lot, uh, how to, how to not go back there when I, where I don't want to go back. Hmm.

Okay. Got it. And how exactly has your life changed since joining the program?

Oh, it changed completely. Completely. So now I, I, I, I, I, I really I loved the work. I loved to do the work, and I was committed to the work because I really, really found myself in everything that we have done. So I didn't, in the whole 3 months of our journey, I didn't feel, um, that something was not compatible to me. And, um, my goals were very clear and you helped a lot to achieve them. And, um, yeah, I'm just not the same person anymore. I'm, I'm that, that person who, who was before this, um, it doesn't exist anymore.

Hmm, gotcha. Are there activities or experiences that you can now enjoy that weren't possible before?

Everything. Yeah, I think everything. So, um, I, I have a very, very positive, um, approach to life now. I learned to be kind to myself. I learned to love myself the way that I am. I am skating. I am going on walks with my daughter. I am on my feet from 7 in the morning until 10 in the evening, and I'm not tired. I can stairs, I can bring in the grocery bags without dying in front of the door. So, um, it's, it's, it's changed completely.

And the program's definitely not cheap, right? It's not cheap at all. So what would you say to someone who who's hesitant about investing in themselves with a program like this?

Um, I would say, um, I understand that, um, it's, um, for once it's, it's a lot, it's a lot to give out, but, um, if you really want to change yourself and you really want to learn consistency and you really, really, really want to invest in yourself, then it's worth every cent.

Amazing. And we haven't even talked about how much weight you've lost, right? We're like almost done with this. I only have a few questions left. Just to let you know as well, because I know it's been a little long, but how much weight have you lost?

How much weight from before the surgery?

I love that you don't even know. That's great. No, I love it. Right. But that's, that's not the point. Yeah.

No, I have no idea. I really need to look it up. No, I don't. I don't know.

Yeah. Gotcha. Well, do you want to look it up so we can say how much it is?

Of course. Sorry.

No, you're good.

Sorry. It has been— wait, let's see— 18.5 kilos.

Okay. And what was your starting weight?

My starting weight was 86.

Okay, got it. Cool. What advice would you give to anyone who's starting out their journey?

I think the most important advice is not to be scared. Not to be scared and not to have anxiety. Because yes, it's gonna be hard. It's gonna be hard. I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. It's gonna be hard, but Uh, it's worth every second and every penny.

Awesome. And then what are you most proud of accomplishing?

That I— I'm sorry— that I can look into the mirror and I can say, "I love you." Now I feel like I'm gonna cry. I'm sorry.

No, it's okay. Now I'm getting emotional. Yeah, I think that's so powerful. Yeah. And what are you looking forward to next?

Um, to learn, learn, learn, learning, learning new things, improving myself every day 1%. Yep.

1% better every day.

And, uh, keeping myself. With, with me.

Amazing.

For the rest of my life.

And then very last question. We're, we're, we're, we're down to the last question. Is there anything you'd like to share with like anyone considering the program or working with me as their coach?

Um, yes. Uh, that you, uh, that it was a very, very, very good experience. Working with you. Uh, for me, you were the first person in my life who said to me, I am proud of you. I'm sorry. Okay, I'm sorry. Okay, I am really proud of you. Yeah, and that That little sentence kicked me out of depression and anxiety and everything. So I think I'm going to be really, really— how can I— what's the word? Okay, I'm going to be grateful for you for the rest of my life. I really appreciate that, and I really hope that this good that you do did to me and, and that you do to, to, to other people, that comes back to you like a million more, a million times bigger.

Yeah, honestly, this conversation, like, not— I mean, this entire conversation has been great, but This moment right here is why I do it.

I'm so happy that you do it, and I'm so happy you didn't give up. Why would I?

I never would have given up on you. There was no reason to give up on you, ever.

No, I, I'm— I, I saw that— I said that you didn't give up on yourself.

Oh, on myself. Okay, got it. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Awesome.

That's, that's the most important thing, because if, if you did give up on yourself, we, we, the other girls, me and the other girls, wouldn't have, wouldn't have you in our lives, and that would have been such a shame.

Wow, I never thought about it like that. That's really powerful.

You— I'm gonna miss you a lot, and I really, really miss you. And please never give up. Just, just— I know, I know you had a— and had a lot of, um, grief and pain in the last, in the last months, and, um, it's gonna still last, but believe me You are gonna get there.

Yeah. I really appreciate it.

Awesome.

Well, thank you so much. I'm gonna end this part of the recording, then we can talk after. But, uh, thank you so much, Christina, for sharing your experience. I really, really appreciate it. You've been absolutely amazing as a client, and I cannot thank you enough for trusting me too with your journey.