What Are You Telling Yourself?

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Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us here at JLC Media, where we're talking about everyday leadership conversations. And today will be about how we have conversations with ourselves. We're very grateful that you're here. Thank you for showing up and spending some time with us. In this particular event, you're going to get an opportunity to listen from your own perspectives about things you believe to be true. We're going to develop a common understanding about what do we think that creates our behavior. Finally, when you finish this particular piece, each of you will be able to notice and acknowledge the language and the talk that you have inside your head that produces a belief and a behavior. So with that said, what did you hear me say, Colleen, and what did that mean to you?

I heard you talk about that. We're going to be kind of pausing and reflecting and thinking about our own personal self talk and how it produces a belief and from that also a behavior and how we act and interact with others.

That's just beautiful. Thank you. Joe, what did you hear? More different.

Yeah, I think we're going to talk about again, self talk. It's something that we all are aware of and we attempt to manage it, sometimes with greater or lesser success. But we're going to talk about how you do that.

That's beautiful. And sometimes the self talk is so embedded in us, we don't even notice. It just comes out of us. It's nice. Nicole, you're more different.

I heard things that were very similar, and I think what really stood out was the idea that our self talk produces beliefs that impact the way that we behave. So I'm curious to unpack that today.

Good, good. I'm looking forward to it also. And as those of you that are listening to our conversation are paying attention, notice your own self talk as you're listening. Maybe going, this is crazy. This is good, or wow, who knows what you're going to say to yourself? But it all has something to do with how you can learn. Julie, did you hear something more or different?

I'm just looking forward to going the opposite way. A lot of times we do things and we think, why do I keep doing that? Why do I do that? And this is maybe an opportunity for us to sort of look back at what is our self talk that might be driving that, that we're unconscious of.

That's brilliant. There's a piece here in that, Julie, where once you recognize where it comes from and the fact that you have agreed with your self talk, you've sanctioned your self talk, that Creates the belief. And then we end up in a kind of odd spot thinking, why does this keep happening to me? Either good things or sometimes not so good. So let's continue. I'm going to tell you a little story, and from it will come a couple of big concepts. Here's the story we can pick on. Let's pick on Colleen. When she was. How old were you when you learned to ride a bike, Colleen?

Oh, my goodness. I can't remember that far back, but I think I was probably around 4 or 5.

Got it. And just envision Colleen, cute little girl, learning to ride her bike. She's on the bike and somebody's helping her ride the bike, right? And they give her a little push, and she starts to ride the bike, and she's, like, happy. The pedals are moving, the bike is happening, she's smiling, and she falls and she scrapes her knee. And as she scrapes her knee, she starts to cry. And the person that was teaching her to ride the bike comes up and goes. Smacks her in the back of the head, says, what's wrong with you? It's not how you ride a bike. Gotta keep pedaling. This is not okay. Get up on that bike. We're gonna do it again. You better do it right this time. Well, of course, the caregiver, the person that really likes her and is trying to help her learn, says, yeah, let's back up on the bike. And then she's pedaling again. Well, as you know, after a while, you will learn to ride the bike. That's really not the problem. Here's the problem. Somebody says to Colleen maybe a month later, hey, would you like to learn how to ride a horse? And she says, no, thank you. I will wait until I already know how before I try. I will wait till I already know how before I try. What are you guys thinking right this second? Julie, start with you?

It's interesting how one event could then lead to our projecting that that same event is going to happen. So I was thinking that she had such a hard time learning how to ride a bike and was hit over the head and she was crying and. And she wasn't doing it right. And so now she's sort of projecting. You know what? I think that when I ride a horse, that's probably going to be the same thing. I'm going to fall off, I'm going to hurt myself. I'm going to get hit on the head, I'm going to cry. I'm going to have to keep doing it. It's not going to be fun.

Exactly. And then the response will be, okay, not yet. Not until I already know how will I try again. Joe, what did you take from that?

Yeah, so I was thinking about an experience I had with my son in the Midwest. When we lived there, we always wanted. We have always wanted our kids to be good swimmers, and they are. But in the swim class that we had him in at the Y there, his coach was a calamitously overweight older gentleman whose impression of coaching young children on how to swim was to lean over the side of the pool and scream, swim. And so I took my son out of that class, you know, immediately. But again, it's that kind of thing where you want, at least in the case. In my case, talking about children, you want them to be open to learning and open to positive experiences. And so when you encounter those things that create negative emotions or negative memories or negative baggage, that's not helpful or productive.

Well, you've also now got work to do as a dad. So when the coach treats the kid like that, there's an opportunity now for you to spend time with first surfacing. What happened and what were you saying to yourself as that coach was yelling at you? Right. And how do we shift my internal language into a space of I love to swim, I love to learn how to swim. I love learning it? Actually, one very challenging event as we're describing can actually cause a mental model to appear inside that young person. And some kids never overcome it. Some just stop and they stop trying. They stop giving effort because the consequence of giving effort and trying to learn something new did not go well. Nicole, what are you thinking?

It makes me think about the idea of procrastination and perfectionism and how much we can avoid doing things based on our ideas about how perfect it needs to be. Or we avoid doing something because it's new or different and we want to already know exactly what we're doing before we try. And it keeps reminding me of this quote that I read recently by an artist and author. Her name is Morgan Harper Nichols. And it says, do not think less of yourself. If you do not feel fearless doing it, afraid is just as brave. I felt very called out by that because I think I'm one that tends to wait until I know exactly what I'm doing and it's perfect before I'll take action.

That's magnificent. I actually believe I've said to you before, Nicole, that what you're doing with us is very brave because you are stepping into space. That is not Space that feels warm and fuzzy, like I know what this is. And it takes great courage and great bravery to do that. Working with young people takes great bravery. And I remember being scared and, you know, as though they were going to attack me in the front of the classroom and take me down, you know, and that came from my own self talk and my own fears about what it would be like to be in a position of leadership with young people. That is really great. And remember this sense of bravery and courage, it's definitely in all of us. How do we pull it out? Colleen, what's resonating with you?

You know, I think it reminds me back to when I was teaching my son Cole how to ride a bike. And literally he was four and he was like, I don't need those training wheels, Mom. I got this. So here is this 5 year old who hops on this bike and I'm like running behind, pushing him and he's like, stop it, I don't need your help. And he rolled forward maybe five yards and he fell over and he skinned his knee and his knees run in blood and he's crying. He goes, I'm gonna do it again. And I'm like, okay. He goes, push me again. And I pushed him. He fell three more times. He's bloody all over. And guess what? He finally made it on that fourth try. And I'm over there going, I'm crying, no, stop. You don't need to do this, right? But it was almost the opposite, right? It was internal in him. He knew and he wanted to ride that damn bike. And that's what he was going to do come bloody knees or whatever. He kept on persevering until he had accomplished what he set out to do. So I think when we talk sometimes there's that space of fear. But I just wanted to. What resonated with me was almost the other side, where sometimes, even though people he wasn't getting the result right, he knew he's probably gonna fall over again and skin his knee and it wasn't gonna look pretty. But he kept going until he actually accomplished what he set out to do.

So notice that the who said of the greatest magnitude was mom. And she's not yelling at him and telling him, you know, negative things about his capabilities. As much as you were crying, you stood him back up again and said, go. When you think about our work as leaders, in the different spaces that we've been, when we create the right kind of space, people can say, I'm afraid. People can say, I don't know how to do this. People can say, I need help and support. And people can say, leave me alone until I get it right. And I guess, Joe, I think about you as a ship captain where, okay, I'm going to leave you alone until you get it, as long as you don't hurt somebody else. In the process of learning what you're learning. As we do this, it's like, I love people that are eager, but I would like them to have some capabilities. Otherwise the eagerness could get us sideways. What are you thinking about that sentence, Joe?

Yeah, No, I think that's right. And again, I think this comes back to the leader's responsibility. It comes back to something we've talked about again and again, which is how does the leader show up in the meeting, show up in any engagement? And so showing up in a way that says, okay, we're going to do some new things, we're going to do some different things, and we're going to. We may have a sense as a group of. Of that the bar may initially be set a little lower than we want it to be, but we're all learning and we're all doing. And I think that's where the leader has a responsibility to impart his experience, his or her experience, and their training to help the group figure out how to move forward. And part of that training is to recognize the self talk that everyone is going through, the doubts that people are having, the concerns that people are having. Because I think when you speak to that, then it has a very direct and systemically positive effect.

Systemically positive. Joe, in a situation where he was ship's captain, was a who said of the greatest magnitude, you guys are that as caregivers, leaders in the different roles you've had, if you had to tell me what your personal self talk should sound like, what should you be saying to yourself when you're helping your youngster learn, helping a group learn, helping a team achieve a goal. Give me some examples of the self talk that you think would be most useful if you were in one of those positions. Colleen, start us off.

You bet. It's not about me, it's about them.

That's just beautiful. The key is to your work is to notice, acknowledge, and support this work about leadership. God, is it so important. And in the moment, you're actually reflecting on what that kid's doing or what that adult's doing, and then you're thinking, how do I provide the necessary support going forward? It's not about me. That's just beautiful. Nicole, what kind of self talk would you produce as a leader?

What's coming to mind is what am I missing? I think that keeps me in a state of mind versus I'm going to tell you everything I know to what am I missing? What can I learn? And I think that's especially important with our kids because I think we think we know all the answers. We think we know where they're coming from. We think we know what's absolutely best for them. And I think if we can take that pause and say I'm. They have information that I don't have. Just as relevant for leaders too. The people that you're working with and leading and caring for, they have information that you don't have. And if you can create the space where they can share that with you, it's a different kind of environment and conversation.

No, no. That's brilliant. There's a piece here where I was taught you're a leader now, so you're supposed to know things. So tell people what you know and have them do the things you know and will be successful. Well, you might have been a little success, but my God. Great point. Nicole, you will never achieve the actual possible optimized outcome of that team. Very much just doing what you think because we have not tapped into that collective wisdom. Powerful self talk. Thank you. Julie, how about you? What do we say to ourselves as leaders that would really be useful.

I was wondering between Nicole and Colleen, because depending on how new, whatever it is that they're doing, if they're a novice, they may need more modeling and structure. And so I may say one of the things that I say often is watch me first and then we'll do it together. And then I know that with your expertise, you'll actually be able to create something even better. And I want you to come back and tell me what you were able to create. But I usually always start with the watch me. And then we do. And then you do some gradual release.

Beautiful, Julie. There's a piece here, ladies and gentlemen, that are listening. We sometimes treat novices, proficient and master people that really have mastered all of this work the same. We send them to a training rather than finding out what do you already know, what are your capabilities? It's important to learn. It's important to develop our own personal, practical knowledge. When I'm a novice, I don't have much right. And I need you as my leader. So I'm saying to myself, as the leader, which ones that are out there in front of me with me, sitting with me in A circle that need the most support from me. More than likely it's someone who just entered the field, brand new to the command, brand new to the school, brand new to the organization. And if I don't pay attention to my own self talk about that, I will treat everyone the same. You know, I've said this to you before. One of the greatest Mother Teresa quotes from me was when she said to me in person, which is the most unequal thing is the equal treatment of unequals. The most unequal thing is the equal treatment of unequals. Back to Julie's point, I need to figure out, where is this person? And sometimes somebody could have some time on the job and for whatever reason, nobody really said, hey, listen, some things you're doing don't make any sense. No one ever did that. So they're still functioning at the novice level maybe three to five or even 30 years into the job. So we have to figure out how to make sure that we recognize where people are at. Joe, what are you thinking and learning?

Yeah, so I'm thinking about the leader, particularly one who has been in place for a while. And the self talk tends to be, things are going well, things are good. And mentally you go through a process of really memorializing any kind of positive feedback you get that things are going well. So my secretary or my administrative assistant seems to be happy somebody smiled at me in the hallway or said something nice as opposed to editing that and really working strongly with what is the evidence here that things are going well? What is the evidence that people really have the training that they need? What is the evidence that people really understand their jobs? What is the evidence that people are really adapting to change? And so for me, this is, I think, a powerful thing that leaders have to do is they have to learn to listen to their self talk, but they also have to learn how to edit and manage their self talk.

I love the editing and managing. And I'm going to shift to you in a second here, Colleen. One of the things that we've said to people in leadership positions in any place in the world, if I lock onto one idea, if I lock onto one need, I lock out others. If I'm out here just looking for what's good so I can actually feel better about my leadership capabilities, feel better about my leadership interventions, I lock onto only those things that are good, and the only evidence I get are evidence of goodness. As opposed to developing your awareness to make sure that you are expanding, expanding the methodologies by which you bring information to you. So this is, I mean, Joe, thank you for teeing that up. It's an excellent point. We need to keep this in mind as leaders. We need awareness about what's going on. Colleen, what's Lincoln?

Yeah, I guess what I rose up there was what you focus on growth and how you said, you know, if I'm focusing on one particular thing and it could be a positive self talk piece or it could be a negative self talk piece, it could be, you know what, I had this really great idea and I offered it to Julie and she didn't lock on and take it and run forward. So now I'm just kind of focusing on the fact that, you know, Julie really discounts my opinion and perspective. And if that's what I continue to focus on, it impacts how I show up in not only my conversations with Julie, but my ability to really, truly collaborate with the team.

Outstanding. So here's an example. So elementary teachers that I got to work with over the years and say, how's your class this year? Oh, this first grade is not as good as last year. So. And guess what? They won't be. And the only evidence that that person is going to bring in is evidence that they're not quite as good and they're going to hold the kids in that place of not quite as good. Military. This bod is not functioning as well as my last spot. Last spot I had was great. Not so good here. Sales agents, leading set, leading agents. Right. This group of agents that I'm leading, my God, they got so many issues with them. They're just not. They're not as good as the last one I had in the other region where I used to work. All of a sudden I'm locking onto a particular. Then what am I doing? I'm sanctioning my self talk and now I'm stuck. All I'm going to see and Joe and Colleen. Beautiful. All I'm going to say is evidence that supports my self talk. Brilliant, brilliant. Lock on lockout. Important concept. Off to you, Nicole.

One of the things that came to mind for me as we're having this conversation are the leaders that I've worked with that have transitioned into new roles. And what I've seen happen is a leader will come in. They're an expert, let's say, at process improvement. They come in and they're leading a new team. And they immediately, because they know it, glom in on the process improvement element. From their perspective, their self talk is, I've got to prove myself in this new role. I have to show what I know and demonstrate that I have these capabilities. And I'm going to glom in on the process improvement elements of whatever that role might be. And then on the other hand, you have this group of employees that now has a brand new leader that they're getting to know, getting to experience for the first time. And what their self talk becomes is, this leader does not trust us. You know, they don't know what they're doing. All they're focusing in on is how can we improve this one little process. But we already have a system that's going well here. So a lot of issues can arise in that, you know, they feel like this leader doesn't trust them. That generates all kinds of of self talk from the employee perspective and a leader perspective. So it's a really interesting dynamic to come in and think about what is this leader self talk and how might they interrupt that? As Joe was talking about, how do they notice it and shift it? And then how do you also manage the self talk of all of the individuals on your team based on how you've shown up?

Beautiful. We shift almost instantly into a whole other modus operandi, because I know what I need to do in my own mind to make this team be successful. Brilliant. Julie, where are you at here?

I'm at the next step with Nicole. Some of the clients that I've been working with, they were those leaders that come in and they're like, oh my gosh, we have to fix this. That and the other thing. And they're really trying to get people moving. And I most recently, I said, how about appreciation practice where you appreciate what they are doing? Because what you're missing is there's a whole bunch of wonderful things that are going on and all you're seeing are the things that still need to be done. And you're trying to play catch up from the previous leader. And this leader got back to me and she said, you could not believe the room. The whole mod itself just got lighter and happier when she was appreciating doing this appreciation practice. And I said, you know, it doesn't have to be this big, huge presentation, just everyday leadership conversation. Notice somebody doing something, well, say it. If it's in public, even better. And that will really turn the tide because they'll realize, yes, you see some things that need to change, but you're also noticing things that are going well.

Yeah, gratefulness and appreciation for effort, specific effort goes a long, long way to building those relationships. And I do think new leaders, before they get their new Space. Somebody told them what was wrong with it. Somebody's coached them. Go in there and fix this. Go. You know, these people can't get this stuff done on time. Laugh. All these little sentences. And then so you show up and your self talk is, I want to please my boss. I want to make sure I make an impact. So all of a sudden I'm changing the way I'm showing up. And when you offer them the opportunity to be grateful and appreciate the effort, I mean, if I think about the military, it's hard for me to say anything other than thank you for your service. Thank you for letting us have our lives while you stood watch. That's a powerful piece. And even the civilians that work on those activities, they're doing the same thing. They're in support of us out here. I think we missed that on occasion.

Joe comes back to oh, sorry, go ahead, Nicole. What you said just kind of came full circle to what Colleen had mentioned earlier about what you focus on grows and the eye will see what the mind looks for. So as Julie's example of if you start trying to look for things to be grateful for or positive things to recognize, that will be what you see. And so then you are going to start to notice the things that are going well. And when you're focusing on what's going well, that will reproduce.

I love it. And notice those of you that are listening. We are in alignment with certain big concepts. The big concept that keeps unfolding here is what you focus on grows. So if my self talk is causing me to focus on something that's problematic or negative or something needs to be fixed, I stay there and my behavior matches my belief. My belief comes from my self talk. Whatever belief I've sanctioned and agree up yet, this place is screwed up. I got to do so now all of a sudden, rather than being grateful and appreciating effort and specifically appreciating things that are well done, we drift into looking for locking on to things that are problems. Joe, final thoughts on this piece?

Yeah, so I think it's very important in executive level thinking for them to figure out how to use the skills that they bring to the job but also not be limited or defined by that. And we've touched on that in several ways here. But I think if you're an executive that's in charge of a big organization and you used to be part of marketing or sales or whatever, there's a tendency when you do some management by walking around to walk to those places that are familiar to you that Are comfortable to you. If you now you own the loading dock and you never spent a day on the loading dock or an hour, let alone a day. So you don't really know what goes on down there. Then when you walk down there, as if part of your walking around, if you, you know, screw up your courage enough to go down there, then what is your self talk? Well, your self talk is this is awkward. You know anything about this, you need to leave this place. Don't talk to these people. You know, go somewhere else where you have some clue of what they're doing. When the truth is is that the team, I believe, really wants to see you. They want to be recognized. And so, and so taking some baby steps to say, as Julie said, acknowledge, appreciation, hey, we appreciate what you guys do down here. I don't know much about what you do down here, but I would like to learn more. So hey, could you kind of walk me around and show me the basic things? And so, you know, so it becomes a little awkward at first, a little less awkward and then you get a lot more comfortable in doing those kinds of things.

And that's really good. It's almost like the interesting literature. A woman that was the chief operating officer for a manufacturing company shifted to a services company, same role, equally successful because she learned that I love leadership, not manufacturing, not tech support. I love leadership. And she behaved that way all the time. And Joe just gave you a perfect example. Final thoughts from you, Colleen.

I just think many times we look outward when we're starting to think about whether things going well, things going wrong. And I think that many times it's just to pause and to reflect to think about how am I contributing to the situation and where is my self talk, how might I shift, shift that so I truly can show up and engage in ways that will really enhance the collaborative environment and help the team to win. I think just to pause to think about that because many times we don't. It's easier for me to go, well if Nicole did this differently or jam, Joe did this to me the other day and Julie, you know, versus really that pause and that reflection piece and.

To reflect and then decide on what I'm going to do differently with my self talk moving forward. Yeah, this is awkward and it feels strange and I'm not sure I want to do this. And you know, you all know this story. My first few years as a school principal, I didn't really like the teachers. They annoyed me. They were old as my parents and I didn't want to meet them anywhere. I just wanted to do my job, which to me at that time meant hang out with the kids. It wasn't until I recognized an enormous truism in my work that the kids were going to be influenced through the teachers, the patients will be influenced through the medical staff, the agents will be influenced through those sales leaders that are taking care of them. So this sense of recognizing my self talk about leadership went through and I had really no one to talk to at that time other than myself, which probably explains a lot of things about me. But at the same time it changed me as I began to notice and unfold, moving forward, how to shift my self talk into a different space. That was just great. Final thoughts from you, Nicole.

I keep thinking about the idea that this is a practice and it begins with that noticing. Like Colleen mentioned that noticing and wondering. And sometimes we may be off on some trail that's going really quickly in our head and may not recognize that it's driven by our self talk. So I would invite you to notice where it shows up in your body. When do you start to feel tight? When do you start to feel like that little sense of heat or that sense of nervousness like Jo mentioned, like walking down to the loading dock, you might start to feel that in your body before you recognize that that's driven by your self talk. So I would just invite you to start there. Invite you to start with a noticing and it might show up in places that feel uncomfortable in your body at first and then you can investigate. Okay, what am I thinking right now that's causing my body to react?

So I love that twice now you've given us space to be curious, to be curious to notice and wonder. And if I'm in a learning situation and my other experiences and learning were not very good and caused me to feel bad, sad, upset, on and on. Now I'm in a new one that will show up somewhere in my body. My stomach will get tight or I'll have to go to the bathroom or something's going to go on with me physically because now I'm out of any kind of comfortable space. Acknowledge notice, wonder, be curious. I think this is powerful stuff. Julie, final thoughts.

Yeah, I am not as present as Nicole is and so I don't usually notice until after the experience is over or I invite. And we do this all the time. We advertise and ask people for help. And so as you're going on this journey with yourself, I invite you at least what I have to do because I am not present to what's happening? I ask people, hey, I'm working on my self talk. Can you please let me know if you notice anything? If I've said something harshly or whatever, and my husband and I now point where we laugh and he'll say something and then my face will be like. And I don't even know that my face is like this, that I'm hot, that my face is red. You know, Nicole would, but I wouldn't. Fred can notice it, you know, and he's like, I can tell you're making more meaning about this than I'm intending. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, that hurt my feelings. But I needed him to see it. I didn't notice it right away. So I think, yes, if you're present like Nicole and you can really attend to it in the moment, awesome. But if you can't, please invite other people to support you or do an after action review to sort of think back to your conversation and how it went because you'll be able to figure out what your self talk was then.

No, no, that's wonderful. This is probably for us as a little team, we are constantly inviting our colleagues to notice how we are behaving so that we have space to change our self talk and improve. Quick checkout. What surprised you in this conversation, Nicole?

I think it doesn't surprise me, actually, but it just. It's a wonderful effect how we all just have so many different perspectives to bring to this conversation and how just through this conversation, you can kind of see how each one of our self talk shows up. So that was a lovely element. And I'm out.

Beautiful. Julie, what surprised you?

Yeah, I agree. It was interesting that Jo was like, you know, you've got to be aware of what's going on. Don't just always look at the great stuff because you might be missing things, you know, And Colleen's like, they'll figure it out themselves. This isn't about me. And that's totally who she is, you know, so it was fun to hear people talking about it because that really is the way we are and that's the way we lead. And when we have a diverse group together, you can see why we're successful because we have someone who's watching for the things that we're not thinking about. We're allowing the space for us to do it independently. We're having someone present to say, something's going on with you. What meaning are you making? So I love our group and I'm so grateful that we have this opportunity to Learn together. And I'm out.

That's beautiful. Joe, what surprised you?

Probably not surprising, but I hope one of the takeaways for anyone listening to this is the power behind your self talk. And again, there's of course, quite a bit of literature on this, but the fact that if you entertain and listen to your self talk, that that's going to make your life pretty difficult, that you need to have more sources of information, you need to be open to other perspectives, you need to be inquisitive, and you have to be, on the whole, more positive than your self talk is going to lead you to be in order to be effective in your job. So really recognizing the power, the force, the momentum behind the things we're talking about and really figuring out how you channel them more effectively is key for any executive.

Are you out?

And I'm out.

That was great. Thank you, Colleen.

Sure. I guess for me, what surprises me is it's just your self talk is an ongoing verbal vomit in your mind, in your brain. It's just constantly going, going, going, and it impacts everything. And so I think what's most surprising to me is when we really talked about it from all these different perspectives. As Julie mentioned, it changes constantly. Right. And it's one of those things. And Joe talked about how can we channel it when we're an executive coach and we really. Or an executive and be really focused on how is it impacting your team? I think even more simpler when we go back to our kids and having these conversations with those we love is helping them recognize that it is constant. It's there and it's really powerful. So how can we just recognize that we can make a choice. This is something that's just happening, but we can actually choose to shift and pivot if we so desire. And I'm out.

That's just beautiful. So, ladies and gentlemen that are listening, I'm sure you understand why I absolutely love working with these folks and what incredible gifts they are to me and I hope to you today. There's a piece that unfolded before we got going about if my self talk says I actually love Joe marshall, I have a responsibility that unfolds between me and Joe. So my self talk is I love nicole, I love colleen, I love Julie. There's a responsibility that unfolds. And my self talk is about how do I behave in ways that are most supportive for their individual desires. It's really powerful work this self talk game. Notice your self talk. Pay attention to it. Become curious. Notice how it makes you feel. If you can. If you can't, ask somebody to help you understand how you feel and at the same time, just keep practicing. This is a practice. This is not an end state. This is a practice. Noticing that self talk and what it does to you. Thank you so much for listening. This has been a JLC Media Everyday Leadership Conversation event and you can find us@gojlc.com and you can talk with any of us about your self talk. This was a wonderful opportunity everybody to be with you. Thank you. Have a great day. Sincerest thanks for listening to this episode.

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