externalizing your demons

Hi, I'm Dr. Jo. Today I want to tell you about a technique that I use called externalizing your demons. That's what I call it anyway. I've struggled with anorexia for much of my life, and I'm very grateful today to be in full recovery. One of the ways that my eating disorder manifests was in what I like to call voices that were kind of preoccupying me all day. So basically I would hear this: "You're too big. You need to lose weight. You're not losing weight fast enough. You can't eat this. You can't eat that. You need to restrict. It's too much." Just constantly throughout the day. So I decided that I had enough of it, and in order to fight back, I externalized the voices, given a name, Ed, And when I heard the voice, I would start to talk back. So Ed would say to me, for example, "You can't have that piece of cake. It's got way too many calories." And I would say, "No, Ed, I deserve to eat what I want, and I want to have that piece of cake. Everybody else at this party is eating cake, and I don't want to be the one standing out anymore. I'm going to have this piece of cake." Ed would say, "You're going to gain 5 pounds right away." And I would say, "You know what, Ed, I used to believe you, but that's just not true." And after a while, it got easier and easier for me to listen to my voice and not the voice of the eating disorder. Another example is if my client comes to see me and she's dealing with depression, I might ask her to locate where that depression lives in her body. She might say it lives in her gut, so I might ask her to describe the shape and the texture of it. She might say it's kind of like a stone, like a gray stone, rough texture. So I might ask her to then externalize it, take it outside of her gut so that she can listen to it and talk with it. So she might hear the stone telling her, "You're worthless. There's no hope. You can't do this. You need to just give up." And then I might ask her, "What do you want to say back to the stone?" And she might get a little angry and she might say, No, I don't want to give up. I do have hope. There is room for me to grow. I want to accomplish things. I want to be happy again. And slowly, as she begins to argue with this stone, this depression that's holding her back, she regains her spirit and her voice and her drive to get better. So that's what I wanted to share with you today, and I encourage you to think about what your demons are, what the narrative is in your mind, what voices speak to you and hold you back, and think about externalizing them and talking back from your true authentic self. Take care and be well.