Just Start: The Hidden Cost of Waiting

Welcome to the Optimizing Beyond podcast. I'm Josh Negron, and this show's all about sharing lessons, ideas, and strategies that sharpen your thinking, strengthen your habits, and push you to grow beyond comfort zones. Let's dive in. Have you ever looked back at an idea you had years ago and thought, man, If I would have just started then. That was me back in May of 2021. I knew I wanted to do this. I felt the pull. I even had the vision. I still remember my mentor asked us at an offsite we did with my colleagues a question like, what's the one thing you feel the pull to do but aren't doing? My answer was that I knew I needed to start a podcast, YouTube channel, a blog, or something like that. The stirring in my heart was real, but instead of starting, I waited, I overthought, and I told myself I wasn't ready. Because of doubt, for almost 5 years, nothing happened. Today's episode is all about what actually starting taught me and why waiting felt safe but is actually expensive. Welcome back to the show today. Forgive my low voice. I've got some drainage going on, and so I've got a little Barry White situation going on. Maybe it's better for a podcast voice, maybe not. You'll have to tell me what you think. So let's go back to that offsite back in May of 2021. Where was I in life at that moment? Honestly, I had a great place to start something like this. I was already putting into practice a lot of the things that I was learning, reading about in books that my mentors were teaching me. I had a well-established devotional spiritual routine, great morning routine. I was already regular with gratitude and I had been working out every morning for a very long time. So I had a really strong foundation in things that I had worked on that I could start to teach other people. That's why when she asked me, what's the one thing that I'm not doing? I felt this pull. This immediately came to mind because I knew that I was helping people on a smaller scale. I had people coming to me regularly asking me for advice for fitness, nutrition, and all sorts of other habits. They saw the things that I was working on and the foundations and habits that I had laid down, and they wanted my opinions to help them in their lives. It was such an honor to get that trust. And so it was just natural for me to feel inspired to want to spread that out in other avenues. And if you've ever had a stirring in your heart like that, you know what I'm talking about, where you're like, I know I can do this. I know I can help more people. And genuinely, you feel that responsibility. And to be quite honest with you, that had been present for quite a long time already. And so when she asked the question, I really didn't have to do much thinking to, uh, to think about that idea. And honestly, I didn't really hesitate in saying it out loud when she finally asked, because this idea had been pulling on me for probably several years before that. So you're totally justified in asking the question, why the heck didn't you? Right? And so I knew I needed to start something, but knowing wasn't enough. For me, my biggest challenge was doubt. How would I do it? Would it really be meaningful? What if it was a failure? What if it wasn't produced well? Would anyone really care, benefit, all the things? None of those questions I asked in their reality, but they existed in my subconscious in a way where I wasn't willing to face them, but they definitely had power to stop any sort of action. We talked before on this show about me being a recovering perfectionist. Back then, I was still in that mindset that whatever I did, I wanted to do it with excellence. I didn't want to fail. So out of that, Naturally comes the hesitation to do something new, because most of the time when you do something new, you're not going to be amazing at it. And when you're a perfectionist, you just can't handle that reality. So a lot of times, unfortunately, you don't do anything. Now let's admit it. Was I generally not ready to do something like that? Absolutely. I knew nothing about anything related to podcasting, YouTubing, blogging, or anything, but I did know the things that I was passionate about. And I did know how to share those with other people. All you need is those 2 things in my context to really start something like this. But for me, doubt always found its way in and not always in one way. A lot of times it did it quietly, that tiny little voice that tells you nobody cares, nobody's gonna listen, it's not gonna matter, this is a waste of your time. Sometimes for us logical analytical folks out there, it can show up in that way. Of like, you know, you haven't learned enough to teach anybody anything yet. You need to learn more. You need to accumulate more credibility before you do something like this. And sometimes it's just a really loud voice that tells you, yeah, this just isn't going to work. Why do you think that you can possibly do that? Like we've talked about before, the voice inside your head sometimes says things that you wouldn't dare say to another human being, right? And in a way it makes you feel responsible, doesn't it? You're like, well, I want to do a good job and I want to deliver well. And you can apply that to so many different things. And so waiting and doing absolutely nothing almost feels like the right thing to do. Isn't that crazy that you know what you should do but don't do it because, well, you could somehow do it better? So that justifies doing absolutely nothing at all until maybe you can sometimes do it. It's been 5 years. Come on. Right? So looking back now, what was I actually waiting for? I was waiting for the right time that never came, and I could look back at it now and look at it with so much negative emotion if I wanted to, right? So if you Google what happened to podcasting and blogging during the time of COVID it blew up. So anyone starting a new show around that time experienced crazy growth and success at much higher percentages because People weren't doing anything. That universe just really experienced exponential growth. I didn't do anything. And now, starting it many years later, it's a much different scenario. So FOMO for sure, but that's okay because I started now and that's all that matters. But I will say 5 years is a long time, and this is where weight enters the story. Over 5 years, This idea definitely resurfaced often, pretty much all the time. Anytime I would have a conversation with somebody to help them with, like I said, anything— nutrition, finance, fitness, mindset— I'd realize that, man, this message could be more helpful across the board. But I would make some sort of excuse and say, well, I'm super busy, I don't really have the time, I would have to learn new things, I don't know how to do that, I don't know what microphone to get, blah blah blah. Right. So waiting slowly cost, from my perspective, the ability to help more people. Now, sure, you could make the argument like, if I can just help one person, maybe it'll be worth it. And that probably is a little reductionistic, but it's true. Like, what if something that you could do right now could help more people? Why don't you just do it? What's holding you back? And I think for me, it held me back also in confidence, in gaining momentum in certain things, and in having trust in myself. I had a friend reflect to me back once when I made some promises to myself when I hit a certain goal. That person noticed that I kept moving my goalposts and they really challenged me in an unexpected moment of like, hey, you know, for the integrity that you have, which they knew I prided myself on, they said, you really have crummy integrity with yourself. And I was like, I was kind of blown away. Like, what do you mean? And they're like, well, you're essentially lying to yourself. You're telling yourself you're going to hit this goal and then you're going to reward yourself in this way. And then you hit the goal, usually easier than maybe you thought you would. And then you just move the goalposts and set a new goal and don't really celebrate or anything. And they're like, that's really disingenuous to yourself. And quite honestly, a little dishonest. And they had just read that in a book and it really hit me like a ton of bricks. I was like, man, how can that potentially affect your trust in yourself? So I could say that in those 5 years, I probably made some commitments about, I need to start something, I need to do something. Not to mention my mentors were like, great, do it. And I'm like, okay. And then I didn't. So what does that do to your confidence, your trust in yourself and those kinds of things? I know for me, that was pretty costly. So in a certain extent, it affected how I saw myself in a way. It didn't completely destroy my self-confidence or the way I view myself, but I would say that it did affect some of my Perception of my follow-through because it was lacking and I was playing it safe. Now let's call a spade a spade. My personality naturally likes to be more conservative, to hang back, analyze the situation, and then act and respond. There are definitely other personalities that like to just rush in and take care of business, and if they made a mistake, then they'll go back and clean it up, then they'll assess afterwards. It's definitely not my default wiring, so it makes sense that I would be a more conservative, cautious person going to things like this. But I have learned that over time, waiting until the perfect moment often allows the moment to pass by or moments to pass by that you could have had an impact, right? And so what this 5 years has told me is that when you feel the pull, when you feel the responsibility to do something, just start. There's a famous quote from Seth Godin where he says, just ship it. And what he means by that is just do it. Do what you think you need to do. Release the product, release the blog post, post the first video, and then at that point you'll learn more through the act of doing than you will researching, brainstorming, planning, and all those kinds of things. James Clear in his book Atomic Habits does the same thing when he illustrates the class. We've talked about it before, the class that he divides in half, and whether it's photography students or pottery students, it's the same illustration where one half the class is supposed to make as many photographs as humanly possible. possible, as many clay pots as they can make in the semester, while the other half of the class is focused on making the single one perfect pot or photo. It turns out that the half of the class that does the most reps is the one who takes the best photograph or makes the best pot. And so he says it's all about reps, not about the perfect shot. So what changed? You're obviously here with me today, so something pivoted, something changed. And I realized that I wasn't taking action and it's something that I needed to do. Over those 5 years, I have built my confidence. I have spoken in public. I've helped more people and widened that and gained some additional reps in that area. So I think that over time really helped as well as continuing building those reps of sharing things on social media about what I was reading, what I was learning, and just getting in the habit of wanting to share my journey with other people. Hoping that it would help someone. So how did it feel when I first started? It was pretty stressful, pretty terrifying, to be completely honest. I already had a mic that I had from a previous setup that I did with a friend, and I just set up my Mac, set up my iPhone, and started filming. And I had already made a commitment to myself that whatever the video looked like, that I would not reshoot it. I would make the first episode on something that was fresh and passionate on my mind at that time, arguably a pretty controversial one, to be honest with you, and that it was gonna get posted no matter what. And I had some doubts because again, it was not the first episode I anticipated on doing, but it was one that was straight out of something that I was wrestling with and that I wanted to share with other people. And so it was real, it was raw, and, and I followed through with that commitment. I pressed post when I wasn't even sure that was the best idea. And the commitment was that I would continue to be consistent every single week after that. And I've learned some great things over that. And to satiate my desire for perfection, I made the commitment to myself that every single week I would tweak one thing, one thing that I could improve. What's one thing I could adjust and do better the next time? And that's one thing you learn when you edit yourself. Nobody likes to listen to themselves talk, see recordings, or listen to recordings of themselves. It's pretty gross. And I'd have to say, it's one of the things that I have grown to actually appreciate in editing my own videos is I get to see and listen to myself. And early on, it was brutal, guys. But now it's something that I look forward to because I can see what I'm doing well, what I've changed, and what I can adjust in the future. There are definitely some episodes that I tried some things Didn't work well. And there's others where I said, yeah, that's it. Let's keep doing that. So that was really the beauty of it, that over the first few reps, I learned so much and realizing that, well, this is how you do that. And this is how you save that. And this is how you prevent that. One of my favorite moments was, uh, I don't even remember what episode it was, but I shot it. I actually felt really good about it. It was, it was vibing pretty good. I knew there wasn't going to be a lot of cuts or edits. And I was like, man, that was pretty awesome. And I went back to load it into the editor and there was no sound. I was like, man, that's kind of weird. Well, it turns out that my microphone, the mute button had been bumped and the entire episode was worthless. So I had a choice to make in that moment. I was definitely frustrated, of course, but the choice was, do you just give it up and do it again tomorrow or something, or just get back in there and do it again? And it was tough. It took me a minute to get in the groove because I was kind of thrown off. I was a little frustrated and I needed to get my head back in the game. Now, was the episode as good as the first time? Honestly, probably not, but that's okay because in those moments I'm practicing what I preach, right? And in those moments, that's when you find your strength. And if you think about anything that you start for the first time, whether it's, you know, let's say you pick up pickleball or golfing or something new, right, that you don't know how to do, you end up learning so much in those early days that you could never learn by just reading blogs and asking ChatGPT or anything like that. So the theory of research and planning, there is definitely a place for those things, but you can definitely learn so much more when you just decide to start, give it a whirl, and see what you can do. And there are some really powerful things that kind of tend to emerge after you get moving. People started reaching out and telling me how certain episodes affected them, how helpful they were to them. And those are honestly things that I wasn't particularly expecting. And then to be honest with you, the fears turned out to be super exaggerated or really have no basis whatsoever to begin with. A lot of the things that I was afraid of were just things in my head that completely dissipated, mostly after pushing the first publish button. And so What did action teach me about clarity? Well, I do a lot of reading. I do a lot of researching. I love knowledge and I love learning new things. But there is a type of learning that you can only gain by taking action and by actually doing it. And that type of learning gives you clarity to execute at a higher level over and over. And that momentum actually started changing my relationship with doubt. I remember probably In 2022, after working with one of my mentors for over a year, they were talking about her phrase, your gap in the crap. So she talks about on the left, you have where you currently are, and on the right, you have where you want to be, what you want to accomplish, et cetera. And in the middle, she says, draw a big V. And she's like, and that is your gap of crap. And that is those things that are keeping you from moving towards where you want to go, what you want to do. And I still remember today, I was writing down all of those things that I thought were holding me back. And she says, yep, those are all true. She's like, but do you know what the underlying singular binding thing is for all those things? And I was like, no. And she said, it's doubt. Doubt is what holds you back from doing almost everything on that list. I was like, hmm, yes, I can totally see that. And so that tied into a very tangible way the things we've talked about before. I am a very disciplined person. I don't think that's by accident because discipline over time, over almost decades now in certain areas, has taught me that discipline overcomes when motivation wanes. And so in certain areas of my life, I've established habits and patterns to guarantee that I put in the work And I execute on those areas regardless of if I feel like it. And it's just been a matter of time of applying that discipline in other areas, like sitting down and filming every single week to talk about something that we can optimize together. Now, looking back, we talked about last episode about personality types, and my personality type is one that really desires control. And so I definitely had to release some semblance of control in order to start. Again, similar in the perfectionistic thread, I would have to release my desire for control of a certain expectation of execution in order to just do and just be myself and see who I can help, who I can take along this journey with me, and see where we can go together. And in a unique way, taking action like this started to deepen the trust within me More than waiting ever did. Because like I said before, that responsibility that you think you have of waiting so that you can execute better and never actually execute at all now is completely different. And it's fueled by when I get messages and people telling me their thoughts and opinions about the episodes that they caught. So can you think back to a time where you were just waiting, when there was something you knew you needed to do and you just weren't doing it? What was that for you? I'd love to know. Let me know in the comments. And then, did you start? What happened when you did? Was there unexpected things that happened? I can guess probably yes. Yeah. And then if you haven't started, I will tell you, there probably isn't a better time than now. It makes me think of what a lot of my mentors in the past have said, that the version of you that is necessary to execute on the thing that you know you need to do is a different version than the person you are today. Meaning you have to become a different yourself to level up, to move up, to step up. Once you do that, you will be able to execute at that next level. So I was reflecting back on May 2021 and what this almost 5-year journey has taught me now that we're on episode 17. If I could sit across from that person in that rocking chair so many years ago, what would I tell him? Honestly? Well, I would definitely say, listen, bro, like COVID's about to Make this thing go crazy. You need to start a podcast now. No, I'm just kidding. Kind of. But I would really say, just start, man. Like, you have very high expectations for yourself and sometimes others, and your pursuit of excellence has its place. However, if you keep it where it currently is, it will actually hold you back for almost 5 years from doing anything in this area that you feel led to do. Is that something you're okay with? And just wait. I don't think even 2021 Josh would have been okay with that. And I would also tell him to consider the cost of waiting. If there's something that you need to do that you know will impact more lives, have you considered the people that you're currently unable to help because you haven't taken action yet? Now, I'm not interested in you beating yourself over the head with it. What I am interested in you doing is thinking through the responsibility of that. Because like I said earlier, waiting sometimes feels responsible because you're like, well, I'm going to do it better, right? So I mean, I need to wait so I can be responsible. But what about the people that you aren't helping? Let's feel responsibility for those people. Some mentors might even say they need you. You might be the only one that they'll listen to that will maybe connect with them on a unique way. I believe that everyone is created in a very unique way with unique gifts and unique perspectives. And those things can be used for good. They can also be used for bad. And we've got enough of the latter right now, right? So I think that if you think you have something to offer the world in whatever way really stirs your heart and stirs your passions, Why aren't you chasing that? I get it. You're busy. You're doing a lot of things. So am I. But I'll tell you, this one thing I know has been something that I've been needing to do for a long time. I love sharing what I'm learning. I love helping other people and bringing them along with me. And if that speaks to you, I also want you to take action. Start thinking about what that looks like for you. For some of you, you might know exactly what that is. You might already be doing it a little bit. Maybe now that means you'll run a little faster. Some of you might know exactly what it is and just be like me back in 2021. You haven't taken action, you haven't done anything yet, and that's okay. Remember, I'm not preaching at you. This is episode 17, right? So when are we going to start? I don't like waiting till Monday and I don't like waiting till the new year, but hey, it's the new year now, so let's get going. When are you going to start? Again, tell me in the comments. I'd love to know when are you going to start? What are you going to start? I'm so excited. And I'll tell you, there is something enjoyable about just starting and not being that great. Think about it. There's a lot of creators out there that have been on YouTube and other platforms for a really long time. And one of my favorite things is to go look at their earliest content. And what you'll notice is they've come such a long way. And isn't that encouraging? Isn't that amazing? Like MKBHD is one of my favorite YouTubers in the tech arena. And going back to see his first video where it's super grainy, really rough quality on the camera. He's got his glasses on and he's like 12 years old or something, and it's just awesome. He's just talking about this camera, if I remember right, and it's just super encouraging. And so there's something really nice about just rocking it and bringing your community along with you on that journey. There's also a genuineness and a vulnerability that comes from that that's really powerful. And consequently, on the other end, there's sometimes a barrier that is created if you start too polished and you're too perfect. Right? And so, so I ask you again, what's your May 2021 right now? Is there something that's holding you back? Is doubt in your way? Is procrastination being fueled by perfectionism or certain expectations? Another popular one is fear— fear of failure, fear of rejection, or just fear that it won't turn out the way you expect. So I want you to think about the story you're telling yourself currently to justify the waiting. Is it a legitimate reason? And honestly, it might be, but is there an expiration To that waiting. So what's the plan after that? Are you going to start next month, in the next quarter? Think about that. What's the plan? And then finally, think about what it might be costing you to wait. 5 years is a long time. It's a good amount of time that can affect a good amount of people. And unfortunately, I let negative emotion get in the way. And don't get me wrong, I'm not going to beat myself up about it, but I am going to feel the weight of that choice, the weight of that responsibility, the weight Of waiting. And instead, now it fuels my reps. And I realized that I didn't need more time. I needed more action. And it's not always the big action you think it is. Sometimes it's just the small action of starting. I'll reference again Atomic Habits by James Clear. He says that sometimes going to the gym is too much of an effort. So he suggests picking a much smaller anchoring habit to see if you can get started with whatever you want to do. His example that he gives is putting on the shoes. To go to the gym. And in this exercise, sometimes he doesn't even go to the gym early on. He says he puts on the shoes and then that's it. And then he'll put on the shoes the next time and walk out the door. And then he'll put on the shoes, walk out the door, get in the car. You get where this is going. And eventually it builds a habit where you get the momentum going with the smallest action. And next thing you know, you're doing the thing. So let's do the thing. Just start. Start today. What's the one thing that you know you should be doing that you're not currently doing? Think about that. Let me know. I'd love to hear from you in the comments and see what an impact you can have in the world. Thanks for listening to the Optimizing Beyond podcast. Growth happens when you take action. So subscribe, share this with a friend, and most importantly, put what you learned into practice. Until next time, remember, keep moving forward because daily anything changes everything.