In this episode of Karamo, guest Ivory recounts a lifelong struggle without a father. As a child she confronted a man who denied paternity, learned later that he was incarcerated for a shooting and later featured on America’s Most Wanted. Her mother warned her before the TV episode aired. Years later, a chance conversation at a hair salon led a mutual friend to suspect Ivory might have a biological sister, Andrea. After a series of phone calls, Ivory met Andrea for the first time, both feeling an uncanny resemblance. Karamo then presented DNA test results confirming they are sisters, providing Ivory with a sense of identity after 48 years of missing a family member. The episode concludes with emotional gratitude, apologies, and hopes for family acceptance, highlighting themes of abandonment, discovery, reunion, and healing.
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Growing up, I never had my dad.
Yeah.
First, can I tell you this?
Mm-hmm, sure.
If Andrea is not my sister, then you got a twin, I got a twin, Sarah got a twin, everybody get a twin from Oprah.
Okay.
So, that's just how I feel. No, I didn't have him in my life. I missed out on that. Yeah. You know, that was just something that was not for me. My siblings, they fathers kind of let me come along, you know?
Yeah.
As the kind of sympathy, don't leave her at home type thing. Yeah. And that made me feel not wanted.
Yeah. Here you go, my love.
Definitely not love.
Yeah.
Like, why my daddy didn't want me? Why wasn't I good enough for a daddy?
Why everybody else get to have one?
Like, what's wrong with me? So yeah.
Yeah.
That hurt.
It hurt.
A lot.
Yeah. Did your mom ever have you try to meet him?
When I was 13, we were in the car. She got out, went in my grandmother's house. She said, "That's not your daddy." Yeah. So I went up to him and I said that to him. "Are you my daddy?" And he said no and walked away. And my mom came out the house. I was crying in the car. And she just turned around like, "Cut all that out." I cut it out.
Yeah.
And I never asked again.
Yeah.
Well, I did, but it was years later.
No, I get that. Your mom was probably so hurt from the situation, she didn't know how to process it.
Exactly.
So her only thing to, her only advice could be to you is do what she was doing, which was shut it down.
Yeah.
Just don't feel the emotions, don't feel.
Yeah, that's what she was telling me to do. But I feel.
Yeah, of course you did. Did you ever ask your mother why she told you that that was your dad?
She said, 'Cause it was my father. And I said, 'Well, he said he wasn't my father.' She said, 'I said that's your daddy.' Did you ever try to talk to him again? No, I never got a chance. Next time I saw him with my physical eyes, he was in a casket. So I never got that chance.
Yeah, I hear you. When did you find out that your father went to prison?
I knew of an incident when I was younger. I was outside playing with, I didn't know at the time, his son. I knew that was his son. And an incident happened where he shot somebody. After that, that's what he went to prison for. He didn't go right away, but yeah, that's what he ended up going to prison for.
My producers told me that you witnessed that and not knowing that he was your father.
I did. I was outside playing with his, my brother at the time, I guess.
Yeah.
Yeah, well, hopefully he my brother. Yeah, I was told to go in the house. I couldn't even, I didn't even get a, wasn't allowed to go back over there for like 2 weeks. I was not, I had to leave out the back door and I was not allowed over there for like 2 weeks after that incident.
So then you got older. Did you try to ask your mother about him again?
No, she called me.
Okay.
And she said, I got something to tell you and I need you to come over. So I went over and she said, well, I'm gonna tell you this "Before you see it on the TV." I go, "What?" "Well, your daddy's gonna be on America's Most Wanted. They're gonna reenact the whole situation and da, da, da, da. And I need to tell you before you see this." Wow. Yeah.
So I wanna know, how hard was it growing up for you without your father? Because I'm hearing these moments where you're, these glimpses that were difficult. How, like, what was the rest of the time?
Horrible.
Yeah.
I don't know a lot of people, well, my siblings, their fathers were in and out, they were there. I didn't have that. I never got the daddy-daughter dance. I never got my daddy telling me when me and not to date and my daddy telling me I'm his baby girl. I never got that. I never got. My kids never experienced him.
Yeah.
You know, I never got a chance to experience my father. And I'm mad, I'm mad. Yes. 'Cause I never got that. Yeah.
And I deserved to have a daddy. Yes, you did. And I never got one.
Yes, you did.
So how did you end up connecting with Andrea?
Oh my goodness. I had told my god sister about my mom my dad and our hairdresser, she was at an appointment and she was telling our hairdresser about my dad and then she said his name. And at the time my hairdresser was dating Andrea's brother and she like, wait a minute, that name sound familiar. So she did a couple of phone calls and she called me and she was like, I think I might have found your sister, but I'll call you back. And it went like for 30 minutes, like back and forth, back and forth. And then she called me like, I found your sister.
I'm like, I got a sister?
She like, girl, you got a sister.
So I was excited.
That beauty shop phone chain? That beauty shop phone chain?
Wow.
I was so excited.
And I'm like, wow.
How was it the first time you met her?
I was so shocked. And we both— I'm quite— I don't know how she felt. And you definitely have to ask her.
But she looked more like me than I look like me. Like, you crazy. If she not my sister, that's my twin. Like, my daddy, I look more like her daddy than her. Like, you gotta, that has to be my sister.
All my siblings, they like, oh my God, I look like nobody in my family.
So who am I?
Like, can I belong to somebody? You know?
[Speaker:KARAMO] Yeah, I hear you. I hear you. How did she take it when she got the news that you could be her sister?
[Speaker] I mean, she was willing to meet me. So I came to her house, like they brought me to her house. So I don't think like she was like opposed to it, but I know that Because I'm just gonna say that I don't think because her family doesn't totally accept me, like she can't totally accept me. And like she won't open herself up to me. And like, 'cause she really don't know.
'Cause she don't know.
So we have like this spurt of a relationship, but I love her with my soul and I just want her to love me like that. Yeah.
Does she ever talk to you about your father?
We don't talk about him like that.
Yeah.
Don't talk about it.
No.
Why not?
Because, I don't know. You have to ask her. Maybe 'cause she not for sure. Maybe, like they say, everybody just got a twin.
Mm.
Did she ever talk to her father about you?
When she first went to go see him in prison, or at a point, he said I was his daughter. Mind you, my dad had brain cancer. So when she went to go ask him again, like, 'cause I was gonna go see him, she was gonna work it out where I could go see him, and he said I wasn't his daughter. But he was on his deathbed and cancer was eating his brain. So that's what everybody went with.
Did you have a chance to meet him when he was in prison?
I never got, he died before I could get on the list.
And I know you said that you went to the funeral. What was that moment like for you? Weird.
Like, I wasn't really feeling like I'm alone.
Yeah.
And—
Because you just told me that Andrea's family was having doubt. I pray to God that I give you some good news today. I pray to God. I really do hope. But listen everyone, my guest Ivory says Andrea won't warm up to their relationship until she knows for sure that they are sisters. So everyone, please welcome Andrea to the show.
I talked to my father a few times on the phone, but prior to that, my father got in trouble. As Irie said, he shot my brother's mother. He was on the run, he was on America's Most Wanted. He called me and he told me that that was my sister, that this was her, this was his daughter. I went along with it. He was in prison for a minute. He told me that this was his daughter. On his deathbed, now it's not my daughter. I'm like, I'm confused now.
You said you're ready for your happy ending, so the only way we'll find out if you get that is if we give you these results. Are you ready? This is the results you've been waiting all these years for, to know if this is your sister, to know if he was your father, to know where you belong. Are you ready?
Yeah.
It's yours to open whenever you're ready.
This is for me? For me? This is everything. This is everything. This is my identity.
Yeah.
This is 48 years of missing a part of me.
Yeah.
I know Daddy not here no more, your father. But I just believe what my mama said. And I know my mama would not lie to me. She was too straight from the hip for that. No matter what they say, you always gonna be my sister. Your kids always gonna be my babies. I'mma always love you. And if it's not your mother, I apologize to your mother. I really do. For doubting her, you know. But I don't doubt my mother, okay? I love you. Okay.
Okay. Period, period, period. I told y'all, I love my baby. Oh, thank God.
Thank God, thank God. Oh, thank God, thank God.
I knew it.
Oh my gosh. Thank God. I cannot lie. I was over here. I was over here praying.
I'm like, Jesus.
Oh my gosh.
I'm so happy for you. Oh my gosh. I'm so happy for you. We're having a party. You got your good news!
You got your good news! You got your good news! You got your good news!
Yes, we did.
You got your good news.
I'm sorry, y'all. Don't apologize. This your moment. I don't know.
This your moment.
No, I'm 48 years. Like, I—
like, people kept saying, like, thanks, old sister.
And y'all treated me so bad, man. Like, people treated me so bad. And I still love people. Thank you so much.
You're welcome.
I show gratitude.
Oh my gosh.
I show you so much gratitude.
'Cause I'ma tell you this. No, no, no, no. If it was not for you, your team is freaking amazing.
And I show so much gratitude. 'Cause if it was not for you, She is the sister.
How does it feel to know that you're sister?
I feel great, but I want to say that I apologize for everything you went through.
I don't care about that stuff no more. You're my brother. I don't care about that stuff no more.
I will say this, I hope that the family members that were there understand that your heart is big and that even though sometimes pride can come up and it's easy to be like, you know what, I ain't gonna say nothing, I ain't gonna do nothing. I hope that, I just pray to God that they can release any pride and just say, you know what, it's all right, we're sorry. And then accept you with full arms because you deserve it.
Oh, they gonna accept it.
Okay, you said ain't no pride, ain't nothing.
They gonna accept it 'cause she proud.
I'm so happy you got your good news today.
I am too. And I wanna say again, gratitude to you because what, Without you, this would not be possible. And then I got to meet my best friend, 'cause he was my best friend in my head.
And my best friend gave me a brand new— We best friends now. We best friends now, girl. We best friends. We best friends. In my head, we been best friends.
Hold up, hold up.
Where are you going? I know you wanna watch more Karamo, so click here to subscribe and click here to watch more so we can keep talking and growing, friends. I love you.
