Am I My Wife's Backup Plan?! | Karamo

So my producers told me that you feel like your wife is forcing herself to be with you.

Yes, I feel—

How is your wife forcing herself to be with you?

I just feel like—

That's your wife.

I know, I know, I know, I know. But it's a tricky situation. So first off, there's a big age difference.

Okay.

13 years. She's 45, I just turned 32. Oh, okay. Where I really started to feel this way is PDA, public display of affection. When we're outside, we go on dates, you know, different stuff like that. I try to like hold her hand or lock arms with her or something like that. And it's just kind of like brief and then it ends.

She lets go.

Yeah, and I'm just like, people are around, like why? Like why not? And then immediately I just go into like, you don't really wanna be with me. And then just like the little disagreements that we have and just certain things that are said and I'll move around or you know, whatever, or just kind of like, a nonchalant type of thing. You know, once you're with somebody for so long, it's kind of like, it's the regular, it's the norm. We have the family, we have our schedule, our plan, and I just feel like—

You feel like the romance is gone, the connection is going.

Yeah.

Got it. How long y'all been together?

6 years.

6 years together. Okay then. So who is she following on social media?

Okay, so this is where it gets a little tricky. She follows a lot of women on social media, but she is a photographer. So that's how I met her. I was attracted to her, so my thing was, "Hey, like, can I get a photo shoot?" And she gave me her number and was like, you know, "Hit me up." And then kind of just like, "Hey, come over, I want a back massage." And I was like, "Eh, I'm on mommy duty," you know? And then eventually, you know, she came around, she picked me up, opened the door, had roses, you know, it was just like really, really nice. But I'm just like, if you did that with me—

Ah, it's triggering some insecurities.

I'm just like, how do I know that you're someone somebody else not trying to get a photo shoot.

Oh God.

And there's a lot of models.

Are they younger like you?

Some of them are young like me, yes. A lot of them.

Is she normally attracted to younger?

Yes.

She is normally attracted to younger, okay. Has she lied about not knowing these people that she follows?

Yes, yes. And it's like, I know you know who these individuals are because some of these individuals are followed by other family members.

Oh, what makes you think that she has backup women?

It's just like her actions sometimes. Like the phone goes everywhere with her. So it's just kind of like, you know, once we like have our little situations and just so nonchalant, like it's like, okay, I'll leave. Like whatever. It's like, dang, like you got somebody else?

Like you just throw it away?

Okay, so like if y'all have an argument or something, she's very just like, okay, I'm walking away.

Dismissive.

Dismissive, I'm walking away. Well, I think it's time to meet your wife to hear her side of this story. So everyone please welcome Rashonda to the show. Hey Rashonda. How you doing? Good, how you doing? Good to meet you. Thank you for being here. Good to meet you as well. Yeah. So I'll get right to it. I'm gonna ask you directly, are you cheating on her?

No.

No, okay then. And how does it feel to be under constant suspicion?

It's pretty much annoying.

Yeah.

You know?

Yeah.

Yeah, it's scrutiny because when you know that you're not doing something, and someone just constantly and constantly nags you about what you're not doing, it gets a little overwhelming sometimes.

Got it. And when did she start accusing you?

From the very beginning.

Oh.

Yeah, 'cause when you have family members that tend to be haters and like to bring up exes that you clearly forgot about yourself.

Okay, yes, but the very first time where our relationship got serious, and we was sitting in the parking lot and there was a person that you introduced to me as your Gemini twin. I went through your phone then when you were in the store and it was a girl that you wanted to sleep with. Y'all had like all different kind of conversations. However, you did say that you didn't know if, you know, our relationship was gonna be serious or whatever. But that was the first time I was just like, it still made me feel some type of way 'cause even if you didn't know, we were already in a committed relationship.

But you were still living with your ex.

No, see, you like to leave stuff off.

Hold on. Okay, so, but no, but okay. But no, but if we're gonna go there, so this is the situation. So this goes back to when we first got together. So when we first got together, it was more like when I had hit her up for a photo shoot and she gave me her number and everything like that. She asked me, she said, so what is your situation? And I said, me and this person, you know, we're living together, we're co-parenting. Long story short, She left me on scene. When she hit me back up, you know, I was like excited, but I'm just like, okay, like, you know what it is. But she was picking me up every weekend. You know, that's where the stability like came into place because she was like, okay, well let me help you get a job. Let me help you, you know, do this and that. And like, you know, strengthen yourself as a woman, as a mother. Like, you know, I got you. We were friends.

And that's why with the friendship you thought you could just be honest with me. From your point of view though, you're like, I wasn't ready 'cause I didn't know where we were going.

So I was supposed to just lie?

So it took 4 months to, it was 4 months before she came back to my house and didn't leave.

Okay, got it. Okay. So you're like, the timeline wasn't that long, but for you it was like, it broke a little bit of the trust in your mind.

Well yeah, 'cause it was just like, even though I told you from the jump like what was going on, you knew what was going on. You know? We would talk all the time.

I know from the outside looking in.

Yeah.

But I still had some type of, you know, I'm a woman too. Just 'cause I'm a masculine woman doesn't mean that I don't have my own insecurities as well.

Yeah, makes sense. You know? So why does Skylar feel like you're forcing yourself to stay?

Because now I'm to the point where it's just, I've been real nonchalant about the accusations. I mean, you could only take so much, especially when you're not doing something.

Mm-hmm.

You know?

So now you're just sort of like, you keep doing this, I'm just gonna keep disassociating, disconnecting.

Yeah, and I love her.

Yeah.

You know?

I love you too, but don't be nonchalant though. Like the nonchalant for me, You know I'm big on energy, I'm big on communication. So when you're just nonchalant, it's like you don't care.

But you know I care. I show you that I care with actions. Actions speak louder than words.

I mean, I feel you, but at the same time, your actions could be that, but it's still the actions. Okay, fine.

Well, I mean, you're communicating your needs, but she's also communicating hers. She's saying like, for me, though you're showing up for her and doing these things, she's saying that she still needs to feel the connection. You know what I mean? She still wants to feel as if you're there by hearing it. You know what I mean? And you're admitting that you're checking out.

We have 4 kids.

Mm-hmm.

You know, 4 sons. I have a biological son, he's 26. She has 3 sons from her previous marriage, you know? So where I stand at it, our time has to be spread out with everything.

Yeah.

Everybody has to feel loved in the house. Yeah. Not just me and him.

What about the times we're in the house and it's pretty much like I'm in one room, you're in the other room, like you don't wanna be bothered? Like, that's kind of like something that has been a thing.

It's not that I don't wanna be bothered with you. I don't wanna be bothered with the people that you're on the phone with because you're constantly on social media.

But it's work.

And mine is work.

Mm-hmm.

Okay. Those are my clients on social media.

All right. Do you ever feel like you're at different stages in life?

No, I don't feel like we're at different stages in life. Like we both just decided to go to college together a couple of years ago.

Okay.

So we'll get our bachelor's in December.

Congratulations.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

So I mean like I know those are couple goals, so we do have goals, you know, together.

Mm-hmm. Have your feelings changed for Skylar at all?

No, my feelings haven't changed for her. My feelings, every day they get stronger even with all the cattiness and the craziness. Like, I put a ring on it. I didn't put a ring on anyone else.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but you say, okay, I'm not trying to sound like it's like a rebuttal and it's something that's like always negative or anything like that because when we did first get together, she did say, "I don't wanna get married. I'm not signing papers. I don't wanna date anybody that has children." True.

And listen.

And she did everything that she said she didn't want to, so.

'Cause the actions are louder.

Mm-hmm.

But at the same time, now with the nonchalant, it's just like you didn't want this to begin with and—

'Cause you can only take so much.

Okay, you got that.

Uh-huh, okay then. What has to change for you to move forward in this marriage?

Well, just the bickering back and forth about things that I know that I'm not doing.

Yeah.

You know? Mm-hmm. Like that definitely has to change. We came all the way from Las Vegas, Nevada for you to get the same exact results that you're gonna get.

Okay. Okay. I will tell you this before we get into this. The one thing is I know you keep saying actions are louder than words, but when you just gave that one little word right there and said, "Hey, I love her. My love gets deeper every day." The way she just lit up. But I know sometimes that the way you're feeling is honest because you're tired of being accused, which is why you're here to unlock this phone. But understand that that moment is all she's asking for. And when you just did that right there, I saw a whole change in your relationship. Once we get these unlock the phone results, we can really find a path for y'all to be healthy as long as ain't nothing in that phone. So let's unlock this phone, okay? Okay. Rashonda, we unlocked your phone, okay? Okay. All right, here we go. All right, Skylar, you wanna know if Rashonda is DMing other women. She says she is not. My lock the phone investigator searched her DMs and found that Rashonda Is telling the truth. Skylar, you wanna know if Rashonda is texting with any other women. She says she is not. My locked phone investigator searched her texts, the ones that are in that phone and the ones that are not. And Rashonda—

Is telling the truth.

She's telling the truth. Skylar, you want to know if Rashonda has any explicit photos. She says she does not. My love phone investigator searched her photos and found that Rashanda is telling the truth.

Crazy, crazy girl. Well, I got to make sure.

Look at that.

3 zeros. The only time I've been a zero in my life.

All right, well, Skylar, we unlocked your phone. What? Yeah. Skylar, we unlocked your phone. Oh. Here we go. Okay. Rashonda, you wanna know if Skylar is DMing other women. She says she is not. My Unlock the Phone investigators searched her DMs and found that Skylar is telling the truth.

Baby, I don't want nobody else.

Rashonda.

They didn't check if it was men?

What happened?

Just women?

We check all.

No, I do not. I'm just making sure.

No, I'm just saying. I can be clear with you. We actually check all DMs. So if anything would've popped up, we gonna find in the DMs. If it would've been a— I'm gonna tell you this, if it would've been too many of a different likes, okay? And my investigator texted me right now and said, "We check men." You look right there, check men and women. So you can be confirmed, we check men and women.

Okay, baby. All right, thank you.

All right, Rashanda, you want to know if Skylar is texting with any other women. She says she is not. My locked phone investigator searched her texts and found that Skylar Is telling the truth. All right, Rashonda, you wanna know if Skylar has any explicit photos? She says she does not. My Unlock the Phone investigator searched her photos and found that Skylar is not telling the truth. My Unlock the Phone investigator found a sexually explicit photo in your camera roll from deleted video. We don't know what this from.

Explain.

Oh, okay. Can I see that, Ralph? Yeah, let's go see this together. So what? It's a— thank you, Rob.

OK.

Thank you.

Let's see this.

It's not thank you.

Do you know what's going on in here? No. OK. Oh, let me see this. Do you know what that is? What that's from? OK. What's this?

Oh, no. Work.

This is work?

I promise you it's work.

It's—

I can't really get too into it, but it's definitely work. You know what work that is.

What kind of work? Is that you?

No. No, that's not her.

Is that me? Does that look like me?

No. OK, I'm just making sure.

It said an S. That's not an S. Oh, that is an S. That's an S. But that's not me.

Yeah, that definitely isn't you with the thighs.

But you know that she's not—

Yeah, but you know who.

Okay.

Well, she does do a lot of work on social media as well.

Okay then. Okay then. Okay, I mean like the person ain't naked or nothing. Just let y'all know. It's just little risqué photos. So it's not like the person is butt naked or nothing. Like, you know what I mean? Like, but I mean, we gonna find it in the phone. I told you. Exactly. Okay.

Thank you, sir.

Yeah, you're welcome. So how do you feel?

How do I feel? She brought me to this show.

How do you feel?

How do you feel? Well, it's a relief. Yeah. For sure. I'm sorry. It's okay. Because I know I could be a force to work with.

And it might not even end at this show. So we might be calling you. No, I have faith. We gonna call you again.

Okay. No, no, no. I have faith it's gonna end. I have faith it's gonna end. But what I do tell you is that what you expressed earlier about having 4 sons, about being in school, also trying to work, also trying to make your lives happen, You all need to do a better job at finding time for each other. Right. And I think that at the 6-year point is when a lot of couples start to find themselves at a point where we just start taking each other for granted. We're in a routine. This is just what it is. And that's actually when you have to dig in and dive in deeper. That's when you have to say, okay then, I can't wake up in the morning and just say, I'll give you a little kiss. That's when you have to wake up and say, no, let me embrace you and give you something passionate to work with throughout the day. When you get home and you're going throughout the day, instead of just saying, I'm busy and asking about like how the kids doing, how's work, how's this doing? You say, I don't care about any of that. I just wanna let you know you sexy. I wanna let you know that you are special. This is where it's important.

I can say that I need to do that.

Okay.

A lot more.

Good.

And I will.

Can you make a commitment to say that you do that as well? Yes. Because this is where the point where it have to dive in. I think a lot of people need to hear this because they forget that like, when you've been together a long time is not when you get comfortable. It's when you start to dig in even more. You pretend like you are dating. This is the moment. Listen, any guys out there, any girls out there, if you've been in a relationship for 10 years, I promise you, let your partner walk through the door right now and you surprise them with a passionate long kiss. It's gonna shock them. They're gonna be like, what's going on? Because we all know you get so used to just, hey, how you doing? We eat now, blah, blah, blah. You gotta switch it up. You have to get back to the basics. Basics and really let people know that you desire them. If you wanna build this relationship on trust, there has to be some lust again, okay?

Yeah, I agree. Okay? Okay.

We gotta bring that back. Bring that back. Let her know. Y'all both still look good, okay?

That's how it started.

It's not how it started, okay? Don't forget how it started, all right? All right? You gotta keep it. Exactly, keep it there, all right? So congratulations that y'all— Oh, I was so happy. I was like, if this Rashonda is doing something— We the same age, I promise you, we's about to fight. I was like, do not be up here Y'all doing something, all right? Listen, I'm glad y'all got y'all truth, though.

Okay, then.

Good luck to y'all both, all right? Thank you.