Am I Not The Oldest Sibling Anymore?! | KARAMO

Shontay and Dauanna's search for their biological father brought them to each other. So everyone, please welcome Shontay to the show so we can hear her side of the story.

Are you gonna walk out? Oh, you look great. Oh my gosh.

Nice to meet you.

Yes, great to meet you. Come on. From head to toe.

Thank you.

Oh yeah, right? She looks great.

Okay.

Thank you.

Thank you for being here. Thank you.

And gracing us with your presence.

Thank you for having me. You're welcome. So please, let's go into this. Your father, was he involved in your life?

Not really, no.

He was not involved?

He was not involved. I would see him every once in a while, maybe.

Got it. How was your childhood, good?

In spite of not being raised by my parents, it was good. I had an individual that raised me, which I'm grateful for.

Amen.

I have 3 brothers, which I am the second oldest on my mother's side, and they are wonderful.

That's great. So you still had love and you had support?

Absolutely.

What did you know about your father?

Well, I knew that he was a father of many. Uh-huh. And I knew that he was like out in the streets doing things.

This is him right here?

That is him.

That's the man. We can understand why he might be a father of many. What was his name?

His nickname was Bowman.

Bowman, okay. Yes. Uh-huh. And so he had a lot of kids?

He did. Like 15.

Ooh.

As far as I am aware, but it depends on who you ask. Some say 13, some say 11. But I was always told at least 15 kids.

Got it. Were you raised with any of those 15 kids?

No.

None of them?

None of them.

Okay then. And how's your relationship with your brothers?

On my mom's side?

On your mom's side.

Oh, it's wonderful.

Wonderful.

I love them. Oh my goodness. They are my heart.

Yeah, okay then. So after all these years, why did you begin searching for the other children?

So when my dad would come around, he brought my brother that was the second one after me, and he and I developed a relationship. About 15 years ago, he started working at my employer, and so we got closer. He would say, "Hey sis, we have some other siblings and I know some of 'em." Like, "Oh, okay." So he said, "I'm gonna introduce you." So when did you realize you were no longer the oldest? Oh, well, let me tell you about this. So I access Ancestry.

Yeah.

And so when the information came back, it was like a whole list of relatives, over 300 relatives. But one that stuck out the most was Dewana's. And I believe it was a 16% match, half-sister or aunt. So I reached out to her, I messaged her in November. She messaged me back in January.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Of this year?

[Speaker] Of this year.

[Speaker] Wow.

[Speaker] Yes. And so we started setting up some time, so that we could connect and have a conversation.

Well, there it is. "Hola, hope all is well. I submitted my DNA and I see that we are a match. I wanted to reach out to you to see if you are Sterling Blanks' daughter. Hello, how are you? I'm doing well. I'm not sure who my father is, but I'm trying to figure it out." Wow.

And when I saw that, my mouth just dropped. Like, my heart went out to her because I didn't know anything about her. His family didn't know anything about her. And one thing that I can say about him is that if he knew we would know.

Yeah, you would know.

He would acknowledge his kids even though he didn't do nothing for 'em.

What a shock, but also a gift for her to somebody say, I might can give you information on who your father is.

Yeah.

Okay, have you built a relationship with her since then? 'Cause it's only been a couple of months.

Yeah, so we, when I first talked to her, our first conversation, we did a video call and I was like, you look like our little sister, her cheeks. Match, and then here. But they tried to compare the nose, like, no, I don't have y'all nose.

It's okay though.

And so I told her, I was like, look, the other siblings, I know they want to meet you. So I set up another call later that day, and all of us was on a call together, and we're doing a comparison and all of that good stuff. And then maybe 3 weeks later, she came to Richmond because she lives in Maryland. So she came and we just embraced each other. It was like a an old friend like you hadn't seen in a while and we embraced each other.

That's amazing.

The connection just felt really good. She's outgoing, I'm more reserved. She's like, "Oh yeah, we gonna make sure we take it." I'm like, "Hey, let's talk about it first." Before we go into anything, let's just discuss it and see how we should approach this. So yeah.

Okay then, what would the DNA truth do for you?

It will help connect the dots. With his heritage and his lineage, right? And also just bring that closure to a piece of my journey. Even though my journey continues on because that's not all of them, at least I have a piece of him within her.

Yeah, of course. Well, I think it's time to meet Dewana and hear her side of the story. So everyone, please welcome Dewana to the show.

Hey, sister.

Oh my God, how are you doing?

You all right? Yeah. OK. All right. You OK?

Come on.

Come on. Come on.

Hi. Thank you for being here.

I'm good.

How are you doing? You look very pretty.

Thank you.

So what pushed you to take the genealogy test?

I was trying to find my biological father, siblings. So I can see if I have any nieces, nephews to see where I come from.

Yeah, take me back to growing up. Who did you know as your father?

My mother got married and that was my father. My sister's dad was my father. He was an awesome man. He was there to, from the time I was like 5 or 6 till I was in my 20s or 30s where he passed away and he's been there for me.

So he was a great father figure?

Yes, he was. Yes.

But even with that, that's great, yeah. But even with that, you still wanted to know. You still had questions about where you come from.

Yes, I did. I wanted to know my biological. I wanted to know my daddy's side of the family, you know? And I just wanted a piece of that.

Yeah, of course. Did your mom give you any answers?

No, not until I, I was grown, when I turned 21, then she told me.

Okay, and what'd she tell you?

The person she told me is not the person that I felt is my father. Got it.

So she told you a different name?

Yes, she did.

Okay.

I actually met him.

You did?

Yes.

And did you have a connection with him?

No, I did not. No connection? I went to go visit him, he lived like an hour away, and when I got there, we talked for a moment. Like 30 minutes later, he went outside and went to sleep on me, and I was in his house.

Oh wow.

So I'm like, huh, okay. Yeah.

Well, he's not it.

He's not it. But you all never took a test.

No, we didn't.

So it was never confirmed.

Right.

So that does lead to the questions because if your mother's confirming, hey, this is the man, but you know what I mean? Because we've seen, this is one of the crazy parts about this show, which why we do this is because the genealogy tests are never accurate about what it is. It just says you could be this or that. You're somewhere in the family. And so hopefully you all are sisters, but there's also this doubt now that your mother has put into this equation.

Yes.

So leading to that doubt, if I could, when the gap in between me messaging her and her responding was because she got discouraged. She had reached out, so of course, because we share DNA, we have other relatives that's in the line as well. And this particular person, she reached out to him and she asked, "Are you my dad or your brother?" No, I would say my first cousin.

So he was telling me about his uncle and, well, he have like 3 uncles and he was like, well, I think this one might be your daddy if, you know what I'm saying? So I was like, well, can I get his number? He was like, no, but I can reach out to him. I said, please do. So he reached out to him, he got back to me and he was like, well, he said he's not your daddy. He know all his children. He don't wanna give me no DNA test. So, I just left it alone.

Of course, you're discouraged by that now because now you'll just be chasing these ghosts in a sense because if they don't wanna speak up. After all you've been through, what makes you sure you are related to Shontay?

It's my sister.

That's right.

You know.

You know. Look at that.

So you felt, so unlike that guy, you felt the connection with Shontay.

Yes. That's it. I have no choice. First time I saw her.

Yeah, you had no choice.

Even my auntie was like, "Yes, that's your sister right there." Yeah. Yes, this my sister. Got it.

Well, I think it's time to unlock the DNA truth.

Okay.

Shontay, I want you to come with me.

Okay.

So Shontay, in this envelope is the truth if this is your sister. You have been on a journey trying to connect and find people, your siblings who are connected to your father. You were the oldest, potentially still are the oldest, but you then came across someone who could be your older sister. Who was also searching for her father. In this envelope, it will say if you are related or not. This is your truth to open, not mine, so good luck.

Thank you. Well, before I do so, I just wanna say that from the first day that you and I connected, it was instant. And I knew that we had a spirit that we shared, right? Our father is no longer here, but he lives through us. And I wanna make sure what we didn't get in him, we can provide for each other. Now you heard— So when you and I first had our conversation and I asked you, well, how old are you? And you said your age. And I was like, well, wait a minute. That means—

You're no longer the oldest.

I'm no longer the oldest.

And I'm OK with that. I am willing to share my crown with you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Here is our truth.

Oh, take your time.

Take my time?

Yes.

But hurry up.

Oh.

Shante Dewana is your biological mom.

Oh my goodness.

Your search is over.

Why?

Why?

DeJuana, how do you feel? Your search is over.

I'm excited.

You know your sister, you know who your father is, you have your answers.

Yes, I'm excited. I'm excited. It's been a long time. I'm not gonna tell y'all my age, but it's been a long time.

It's been 21 years, we got it. We already know, it's been 21 years.

Yes, yes.

Congratulations. I'm so happy. I can see the tears coming up. Here you go, love. Of course.

I didn't know you was a crybaby.

I am. How do you feel?

I am.

I'm overwhelmed.

You're overwhelmed.

I am.

I'm in such joy right now. Yes. This means a lot.

Yes.

Like, this starts the journey—

It does.

—of finding the other 2 pieces.

She been looking since November, though. Yeah. I actually been looking longer than that. But you know, you've been hitting me up. She even told me, talking about, I messaged you on Messenger. I said, you messaged me? She was like, yeah, your name, um, DeWanna, Wanna, Bono, right? No.

You were like, no, I was hitting up any and everybody.

It wasn't me.

Listen, I'm just glad you all have your answers. Thank you for sharing your truth with me.

Thank you for having us. I'm glad you all have each other.

I'm so happy for you. Seriously, and any help you need in locating the rest of those siblings, We're here to help. We can be a resource.

Your friends love you. Yeah. They love you.

Tell your friends I appreciate their love, OK?