Did We Both Cheat? Unlock Our Phones! 😫📱 | KARAMO

You were in prison and you found your way to make a better life for yourself. So congratulations for that. Thank you. You know what I mean? Thank you. So you met your lady a week after getting outta prison. Tell me what it was like.

Well, Facebook.

Facebook?

Yeah, I heard a ding and I looked at my phone and it was her.

Yeah. One week?

One week.

Wow.

One week to the day.

Yes.

To the day. So I mean, yeah, I answered her back and we talked for about, 2 weeks and then we met up, went on a date and 4 years later, here we are.

Y'all a cute couple, I love it.

Oh yeah, we started off good.

Yeah. So I wanna go back a little bit.

Yes.

'Cause you were young when you went to prison. How old were you?

18.

18 years old. Yeah, so very, very young. What happened?

Well, I was homeless at the time, living outta my car and I met some individuals and they were in the same prison in the same predicament as me, so we clicked up that night. And then the next day they had this big idea that the girls were gonna go prostitute, for say. You give us a ride, we're gonna call you, pick us up, drop us off. They went and did what they did. I picked 'em up, dropped 'em off. They left, I never seen 'em again, and 5 months later I went to prison.

'Cause you drove 'em there? Wow, so what was it like for you being so young and being thrown into a maximum security prison?

Oh, it was scary.

Yeah.

First week I was by myself and everyone in there has 30+ years. You know, you get a couple people like me who have small time, so you have to really watch yourself.

Yeah. My producer told me that you were in solitary confinement for 180 days. Yeah. What was that like?

It was up and down. It was up and down. I did a lot of reading, I did a lot of working out, I did a lot of talking to myself.

I need a little bit of background, 'cause homeless at a young age, abandonment sounds like, didn't have any family that was really there supporting you. Do you think that time of your life is affecting your relationship now?

Yeah, trust-wise. It puts a big weight on my chest, I guess, to who I trust, how I trust, how I love them, how I, just interact with people.

Yeah. And for you, when did you think the cheating started with her?

I wanna say the first time that I had suspicion was her coming in at like 5 in the morning. Now that's odd for her. When you know somebody for years, you know their ticks, you know how they move. And showing up at 5 in the morning, coming home straight to the shower. Usually you come in, hi baby, how are you? You have a good night?

Yeah.

Then go, but straight to the shower, then come back after, You brushed your teeth, you've showered, you put new clothes on.

And y'all been together for 4 years? Yeah. And so how long into the relationship did that happen when she was coming home at 5:00 AM?

I'd say about like 2 years.

So 2 years in?

Yes, sir.

Wow, okay then. And what happened recently to make you suspect that she was being unfaithful?

Putting perfume on, a little too much makeup to go work in a factory. Just the attentiveness to your phone, which you never had. It's just stuff that led up, you know, that wasn't in her character.

Have you ever cheated on her?

Early in the relationship, fresh outta prison. Well, we had a conversation, you know, she says, "You just did a lot of time. I'm the first girl that you've talked to, gotten with. You have stuff to get outta your system." I knew that, she knew that, you know, that's a big risk a week outta prison.

So from 18 plus for 5 years, there had been no interaction with anyone, especially when you're talking about solitude, confinement, all these things. So I understand where your mental state is. So that, I'm not excusing you cheating on her in the beginning, but I can understand how that could work out. And she decided to stay with you.

Yeah.

Okay. Do you see a future with Elizabeth?

I do. And I mean, we were planning on getting married this summer. So I mean, that's what I need your help for.

Yeah, I get it. Have you turned your life around since you've been locked up?

I have. Went to school while I was in prison. I came home, I started managing artists. Good job, man. And I'm just trying to build something from the ground up, you know? Build a foundation.

Yeah, good job. Good job. So you want me to unlock your lady's phone. What do you think I'm gonna find?

Hopefully nothing.

Yeah.

Hopefully I'm just paranoid. I don't know. Conversations, pictures.

Have you ever asked her directly, "Have you cheated on me?" Yeah. And what'd she say?

She gets angry, you know? And a lot of time people get angry right away, they're hiding something.

Have you ever seen anything suspicious outside of her taking a shower?

Yeah.

You ever seen her like in a store talking to a guy or anything like that?

So the day that she came in at 5 in the morning, she got a text from this guy. Hey, you good? You in the house? Da da da da da. Your boyfriend around? I texted back and I said, no, he's not here. Can you help me make up a story so I can, And she's like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got whatever you need." So I mean, I probably shouldn't have texted on her phone, but seeing that, I was like, I didn't know what to do.

[Speaker:KARAMO] And this is 2 years ago?

[Speaker] Yeah, and it stuck with me ever since.

[Speaker:KARAMO] 2 years ago.

[Speaker] Stuff started stacking. [Speaker:KARAMO] And what's the stuff?

'Cause if I'm, you want my help. You said you wanted to, you wanna make it to the altar and I wanna, I gotta know these things. So what happens after that?

[Speaker] The exact details, everything I can't remember, but—

[Speaker:KARAMO] Did you tell her that you text the guy back? Oh yeah. And what did she say to that?

She said, "Oh, I just got his phone number just because if I ever seen him out or if I ever needed something." Well, why would you need something not from me?

But that's been the only time you've ever seen that ever before?

Well, with one of her coworkers. That's another thing. I brought up something before and she got defensive right away. "Oh, well, he came on to me and," but it only happened like 4 times. She said that it, you know, nothing happened. He came onto her and she pushed him away, but then it happened again and again and again. If this is a coworker and that's making you feel uncomfortable, why have you not brought it up to somebody?

And when does this coworker happen? 'Cause you said the first one happened 2 years ago. When does this coworker thing happen?

About 2 months ago.

2 months ago. Well listen everyone, help me welcome Elizabeth to the show. Hi Elizabeth, how are you doing?

Good, how are you?

Good. So I have to ask you point blank, have you been cheating on Jordan?

Of course I haven't been cheating on you and you know that I haven't been cheating on you.

I don't believe that you haven't been cheating.

Okay, well we've been together for how long? You're talking about something that happened 4 years ago. You still don't believe me. Like how do you think that I feel after almost 4 years together and you still don't believe me? You still think I'm lying. I didn't take a shower that night. I came home and I changed my clothes like I do every other time when I come home.

That's not what happened.

Well, this is my question for you, 'cause you said that it was 4 years ago that this incident happened with this man. He says it's 2 years ago.

It was at the beginning of our relationship. We've been together for, it was, okay, maybe—

Like a year and some change.

It was less than a year into our relationship.

How far after he admitted that he had cheated or he told you that he cheated did this situation happen?

Couple months.

So Elizabeth, you met him a week after he got outta prison.

Yes.

For you, was there no concerns that you had?

Of course there was concerns. I knew he had been in prison for as long as he had been in there for.

So I wanna know what was the concerns though that you have? Because I can only think about the concerns that I would have if I was about to date someone who just got out of prison.

Well, my concerns were that he's been by himself, he's been locked up for this long.

Yeah.

Which is what brings us back. He's saying that he cheated on me. While that happened right at the beginning of our relationship and the reason that I basically forgave him was, okay, he's been in prison for this long, I understand he went out, He's not used to getting drunk and he's not used to females giving him attention.

You understood.

Right.

Got it. Do you think that this time in prison is affecting your relationship today?

Probably. There's a lot of residual issues coming from that that are still affecting us now.

And what do you think those issues are?

Trust issues. I don't wanna say like abandoned, but abandonment would come from like the childhood, things like that.

So do you think that you two have a good relationship now?

For the most part, yes. You know, we obviously have our issues, it's why we're here, but we get along. I mean, we always are having fun together. We, you know, we can talk about pretty much anything.

So the communication is strong other than this trust issue that keeps popping up?

It's about as strong as we make it on that day. Sometimes it's, I don't believe nothing she says. Sometimes she don't believe nothing I say. And then the next day I love her like, I would die if she died.

We both, for the most part, take responsibility for—

Okay. Do you think that Jordan is faithful to you?

Now I do, yes.

Do you feel like you have a future with him?

Yes.

You do?

Yes, definitely. I hope we have a future.

I do too.

So Elizabeth, you wanted me to unlock his phone as well?

Yes.

What do you think I'll find?

I believe that he loves me. I believe that he's not out here doing me dirty. So that's, I'm hoping we don't find anything.

But you just said you don't think he is cheating, so why unlock his phone?

Trust.

Just, yeah, basically just to, you know, kind of reassure myself. Basically our entire relationship, I've been accused of cheating on him and I never have.

Because why?

Because I came home at 5 o'clock in the morning.

Okay, and then what else? Did you lie?

Yeah, because I knew you'd be pissed.

Okay, okay, okay, but then, but then, This man texts.

I don't think that you're remembering this, Karamo. I don't think either of us remember correctly 'cause it was very long ago when we were both drunk.

I remember that was 4 years ago, Jordan. That was 4 years ago.

I mean, just the beginning stemmed on trust. There was no trust after that. I lost the feeling of when I fell in love with her, you know? And it was like—

Are you still in love with her?

Deeply. That's why we're here and that's why I need your help.

Yeah, so I want you to say this really quickly before I unlock these phones is I would use different language than in the beginning, I lost that love because I know that hit you like a brick right there, right? Because the thing is, is that you say then I'm deeply in love. So your feelings were hurt.

Yes.

You lost trust.

Trust, yes.

But the love never went anywhere. No. Reassure your woman of that.

I love her. I'm sorry, but—

'Cause what's just going through your mind right there?

I'm just confused. I'm very confused. He says things like that and I don't know if he, I'm sorry, I don't know if he loves me or not.

Can you forgive her for a lie from 4 years ago?

I can.

What will it take?

If just to say, babe, I lied. Let's just do something else and try to move on from it.

When I'm telling the truth, he thinks I'm lying because I was telling the truth then.

Got it. Elizabeth, we unlocked your phone first. And we went through DM messages, we went through apps, we went through text messages, we went through your location services just to see like, are you going anywhere after work? And so when it came to apps, there was nothing suspicious found. When it came to text messages, there was nothing suspicious found. When it came to your locations, there was nothing suspicious found. There was not one suspicious thing found on her phone, whether it's from a conversation with a man, with anyone on her phone that would lead me to believe you're doing anything.

I believe you, okay? I believe you. I do. I believe you and I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry.

Now Jordan, we unlocked your phone. We did the same thing. We went through text messages, photos, profiles, apps. So when it came to your text messages, I found zero text messages that had anything suspicious in it. When it came to photos, I found zero photos that had anything suspicious in it. Nothing suspicious in it. When it came to apps on Facebook, Instagram, or anything, I didn't find any single thing on your phone that could show that you were doing anything shady. And lemme tell y'all something, the fact that I ambushed you today to get your phone and I still found nothing gives me full relief and tells me fully Y'all two gotta stop. Y'all two gotta stop.

You make me feel so much better. Y'all gotta stop.

Y'all gotta stop.

Y'all gotta stop. So let's be very real here. Y'all already know the symptom of what's going on here. Trust was broken in the beginning. And I have to tell you something. The trust was broken by you from the beginning. And the sad part, but fortunate part, is you had a woman that still understood your circumstances and said, you know what, I'm still gonna rock with you. You got outta prison, you had sexual relations with another woman, I get it, I'm still gonna go there. But because of your issues from before, which you've acknowledged as well, are still affecting you, which I can see it, I can see it in your language, that one moment that she had, It's replaying over in your mind and you have to start to try to heal that part of yourself so that you don't project that onto her anymore. But you as well, you gotta woman up and say, you know what? No more tit for tat. Because every time you go tit for tat, I get it, you're hotheaded, but you can't do that anymore. Because all it's doing right now is playing into your relationship in a very negative way. The only thing that's going to help the trust issues is clear boundaries and also clear language of love. So when he says, "I think I don't trust you," you say, "Well, you know what? I trust myself and I love you and I hope that you can deal with this." That's the language. That's the language you use.

Definitely better.

You have to start to work on that part. You have a good woman here.

I do.

You understand? You have a really good woman. You have to stop accusing her and you have to watch the language. I saw when you said, "I don't love her anymore," what that did to her. Or not that you don't love her anymore, that the love had changed in the beginning. Watch your words because she can only take so much before she ends up breaking and saying, "You know what? I'm breaking up with you." Reassure her, "I trust you and I love you." So the next time those issues pop up where you're like, "Hold on, I feel like you're doing something," instead you're gonna do the same thing. You're gonna say, "You know what? I'm feeling a little insecure right now, but I love you." That's the language you're gonna practice. I want y'all to practice that right now for me.

I've been feeling insecure. I've been feeling untrust, but I love you. I trust you. I need you. I want you every day more. And you know this. I just get stuck here sometimes, and I, like he said, I need you just to reassure me that you trust you and that you love me, because I don't know what I would do without you.

Well, we need to help each other, and I love you Thank you so much.

I feel a lot better. Yeah, good.

Ain't nothing on y'all phone, so y'all should both feel good. But at least you have the language now.

Thank you.

And I really wish y'all all the best, but use better language with each other, okay? Reassure each other, all right?

Yes.

Y'all gonna be all right. Hold up, hold up. Where are you going? I know you wanna watch more Karamo, so click here to subscribe and click here to watch more so we can keep talking and growing, friends. I love you.