He CALLED OFF The Wedding When He Found Out I Wasn't A VIRGIN! | KARAMO

Raheem is denying our daughter and it's breaking my heart. We do have a 3-year-old together and they have a great relationship. He's a great father to her. She loves her dad. All she do is talk about her dad. And I just want the same thing for my 2-year-old. I feel like she deserves the same love. She shouldn't have to feel like, why my daddy don't want me? He sees my 3-year-old, but he even refuses to even see or talk to my 2-year-old. Like, what type of person would do that to a child? So about a year ago, me and Raheem was gonna get married. Everything was going good in our relationship. He came to me, he said he don't want no secrets between us. So he asked me, have I ever dealt with another person? You know, before I did tell him I only kissed a guy, but when he did ask me, you know, to come clean about everything, I told him I slept with another man. He just flipped the script. Everything changed. And he the one who asked, like, if we was leaving the past in the past, what you asking me what I did for? Like, I don't understand. Facts, we was definitely toxic. But my thing is, I've been telling you for over a year to get a DNA test. Why not get it if you so adamant that she's not your child? So y'all, he refused to pay for this DNA test. So I came to Karamo for the truth. Karamo, please tell this man he the daddy. Y'all can cut that if y'all want to. But I had to say that, for real.

Listen, we'll meet Lashondra a little later. So help me first welcome Raheem to the show so we can hear his side of the story. So you tell my audience the context to calm down when they was clapping about what LaShondra was saying? Why you tell 'em to calm down?

She's a narcissist and a manipulator.

You think she's a narcissist manipulator? Yeah. Why?

First of all, let me be very transparent and clear. I'm never gonna take care of a child that's not mine. So if I don't know, I'm not gonna do that. It's a big difference in she actually has a son that when we got together, I'm gonna take care, he comes with you. So what comes with you comes with me. But if a child is made in the process of us not being together, I'm not obligated. Once me and you break up, I'm obligated to take care of what's mine and what I know is mine.

[Speaker:KARAMO] So listen, I completely respect and agree with that. But to your claims about narcissism manipulation, there's two things that you have exhibited those characteristics. You manipulated her by asking for transparency and then punished her after. And then narcissism comes in the fact that you said, I'm gonna only take care of mine, what's mine. Yet she's been asking you for a DNA test. And the reason that you're here on my show today is because you refuse to pay for one. So I would not throw stones throw stones unless you're watching your own behavior.

So, so from the jump, I told her when she mentioned the DNA test, I did say, I'll go half with you. But then I sat back and I thought about it and I was like, you put me in this situation. You lied to me, you told me that you only kissed a guy. And the truth is, I'm a great father. If a child is mine, I'm gonna take care of my child. But since you put us in a situation, you pay for it. Simple as that.

Okay, okay. I'm still hearing traits of narcissism, but I'm also hearing pain behind that. And so I'm gonna get to the—

There's a lot of pain behind it.

There's a pain, yeah, I can hear it. Are you denying the 2-year-old daughter?

I am.

Okay then. So do you ever see this 2-year-old child?

When I FaceTime my daughter, if she's in the camera, I do acknowledge her. I know what it feels to be abandoned and not acknowledged, so I'm not gonna do that to her. But when I get my Asia, I get my Asia. That's my child I know for sure is my child.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Okay then, got it. And how's your relationship with your older daughter, Myasia?

[Speaker] It's amazing.

[Speaker:KARAMO] It's amazing.

[Speaker] I love her to death.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Yeah, yeah. Okay, do you think the younger one is suffering without a father?

[Speaker] I do believe that. I do believe, and that's why we're here today.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Mm-hmm, okay then. Did you have a connection with her when she was born?

[Speaker] No. So my daughter, so we actually have twin daughters. Myasia is a twin.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Okay.

[Speaker] And our daughter passed away at 4 months, which was, a week after my dad passed away. So I buried my dad August 13th and I, excuse me, and I buried my daughter August 14th. And at first I thought like I'm not connecting with Kaori because I was grieving. But the truth is I wasn't grieving 'cause I was so busy making sure everybody else is okay. But then after she told me exactly what happened, it wasn't just a kiss. It started making more sense to me, like maybe I'm not connecting because she's not mine. And all my kids look alike.

And if she is your child, would you feel bad about the fact that you have not been there for her?

No, I won't feel bad because she put us in this place, in this spot.

Did she put you in this place? She did. Okay. Okay.

'Cause she lied. I mean, we here because you lied.

Well, I think it's time to hear from Lashondra. So everyone please welcome Lashondra to the show.

You been selling it. You been selling it because if you feel like that's not your child for 2 years, why not get a DNA test?

Because it's your responsibility, you know. Why stay?

You still stayed after I told you. Why stay? Why not get a DNA test? Why drag her through the mud for 2 years? Why not let her have a father for 2 years?

Where's your responsibility?

What do you mean?

Where's your responsibility?

Okay, what was your responsibility when you had got 3 girls pregnant on me? Did I keep throwing it in your face?

Yeah, you did, you did. Come on now. You did, every argument. You threw it in my face.

And you still wanted me to be in that child's life that you married me though.

Absolutely, absolutely, but let's be clear. But you can't do the same for the 2-year-old. Let's be clear.

And you don't even have the proof that you're not the daddy.

Let's be clear. I did say that when she said, hey, oh, if that child is not mine, I mean, if that child is yours, 'cause I had to get another DNA test about my other son, she said, if that child is yours, I hope you don't expect me To be in that child's life or act like a mother. And I said, cut it off. You just told Kaya Thalaboka.

You just talk.

You just talk. So I said to her, I said that I understand that being that this baby was made when we was at a place where we wasn't together, but we knew that we still wanted our family. I understand if it takes you a process and a minute to bond with that child. I'm not forcing you. All I ask is eventually that you try to come because he's a part of me. And if you cannot value my child while you're with me, then you're not for me.

Okay, and yes, we did say that.

But isn't, hold on one second. But isn't that almost identical? 'Cause I'm taking your words again. Isn't that almost identical to what she's asking you with this child that you see on FaceTime? She's saying it's a part of me. So if you want to—

It's a part of her, but we not together.

But you wanted your family back though.

I did want my family back.

Okay, so if we get back together, that would be a child that's a part of me.

But listen, if it's a part of you, let me ask you a question. When it come down to your son, anytime we was in a relationship, This is not about my son though. Didn't I love him then?

This is about Karamo.

So you just made a statement, and the statement that you made was this, she's a part of me. If we was to get back together and she wasn't my child, then it's my obligation to love her and value her just like I would value mine.

Okay, so what was the love and value when we was together though?

But we not together, so I don't have nothing to value but what's mine.

You just sat here and said you had no connection when you was in my life. What was the love and value when we was together? Where it was then? And yes, I did say Karamo, I did tell him, I was like, it's gonna take me a minute to get connected 'cause you had this child on me. But let's also talk about how I did reach out to the mother and I told you over and over, he said, I don't think that's my child. I said, Raheem, well, if it's not your child, until you get that DNA test, you need to step up for that baby 'cause what if he is? That's what I told you, right?

And I told her that you overstepped your boundary because I don't wanna get connected to that child and then that child wind up not being mine. So I told you, I said something. But it wasn't your job to go to her. That wasn't your job. Your job was to go to me. Your daughter was in the house and you barely could keep up with that.

Okay, but you keep— Now that's crazy. First of all, first of all—

Don't think about it, baby, let it out.

First of all, you keep talking about I overstepped my boundaries.

You did, it wasn't your place.

But you keep making it about your child.

Your place was in that household.

That child is innocent. That child still deserves a father and a mother.

And if you didn't open your legs or lie, then we wouldn't be here.

But you sitting here making me out to be the hoe. I'm not making you out to be the hoe.

'Cause if anything, I applaud you, and I applauded you out here. I'm not making you to be a hoe, but the truth and the reality is you opened your legs and not just your lips.

I did.

And we here. Okay, okay.

But you wasn't there for me when I was there.

And any child that I had when we wasn't broken up, guess what? I'm there for them.

Okay, but let me ask you a question.

I'm there. That I know. And they all had DNA tests.

Let me ask you a question. Do you know when I slept with him?

You told me you slept with him around the time that we broke up.

You a fucking lie! I never told you when I slept with him.

You was a lie.

Well, I don't know what to believe out your mouth 'cause you lied about the kiss.

Ryan, you been lying for 4 years.

How has this affected your daughter?

So even though she's 2 years old, a child gonna notice when one child get to go with their dad and she don't. You know, a child gonna notice when you're on FaceTime with my sister, how you only just say hey and that's it. A child gonna notice. And for you to be abandoned in the hospital and that hurts you and you was in her life for over a year. Why do it to her?

Okay, so I think it's time to go ahead and unlock this DNA test. No, you can sit right here. I'm gonna go ahead and have you do it.

I'm gonna have you do it.

I'm gonna have you open it. The reason, Rahim, I don't want you to open this right now is because of what I've seen you exhibit on this stage right now. At the end of the day, the person that has been suffering the most from this is this woman and I, again, I don't know what's in this envelope. I wanna be very clear. I do it on purpose on this show. I don't know what the DNA results is. So we all gonna find out together. Before you open this, I want you to share with him your last feelings.

You know, I'm not gonna say in our relationship I did everything right, but I would never pin a baby on you. And it hurts me because she, I know she would be hurting. I know I did what I did, but he's punishing my daughter for my actions. And that's not fair. You know I didn't have my dad. You didn't have your dad, why would you do the same thing to her? How you think that make her feel? It makes no sense, Raheem, we didn't have to come here for this. You did this for 2 years, for what? Raheem, Kaori is your biological daughter. I told you. I told you. I told you. I told you. For 2 years. 2 years. What you got to say? You had so much to say. What you got to say now? Shame. Let him apologize. What you got to say in front of all these people? You denied her.

I did.

Oh, I slept with somebody, I did that. But what the results say though? What they say? She don't look like you, but you share the same DNA.

Shame on you.

I apologize for what I put you through.

I don't want the apology. K. Ora deserves it, not me. You got your results. What you gonna do now? Now we should have 3 kids.

Be there for my child like I've been for every other child.

I'm gonna suggest, as I've said since the minute you walked out here, I see the man that you wanna be, but there is a lot of growth that needs to happen. It is very unfortunate that for 2 years you allowed this to go on, and there is now a young woman, a little girl, your daughter, who you will have to explain to why she was denied for 2 years. I'm gonna tell you the first thing that you're gonna have to take the step. And this is from me as a father telling you as another father, you could never disrespect this woman ever again. I've shared this on this show before. No matter what my sons' mother and I have been through, they cannot sit here and tell you once they have ever heard me or say one thing negative about their mother. You have to model this now. You have to be the model. That's the first piece of advice. Secondly, you gotta watch your tone. So if you want to lead your family, you have to be able to hear first. And I think that's the thing that people miss sometimes.

I feel like I make no excuses on I need help deep down.

And I believe that.

And I'm not trying to make myself sound good, but I do my best to be the best father that I can be. Kayori has suffered. And I think more of why I didn't get the DNA myself, I was saving myself the pain and it was selfish. And that—

Why didn't you get the DNA test? Because you were grieving. And I said that to you within 6 minutes of this show. I recognized that you were grieving your father and another child that you lost. And instead of leaning into the grief, you decided to focus on something else. And the next time you're grieving, God forbid something happens, happens. You need to lean into it and not try to hyperfixate or focus on something else.

I wanna say one more thing. You can. One of the biggest, one of the other reasons why, and if she say it's not true, she's a lie, and I'm not painting her a bad picture, but I did not get a DNA test because she has said numerous times outta her own mouth, whether she being petty or angry or not, that Myasia's not my child and Kayori is not my child neither. So she has said those numerous of times, numerous arguments too, so.

You still making excuses.

That's not an excuse. It is. It's when you put me in a place of she's not your child.

You still making excuses.

But I know that she's my child now. And I do regret not being there for her because she's the only child that suffered. And the same way that I'm here, I've been there for my other kids, I'm gonna be there for her. And I can't live with the loss. I was grieving and I was grieving too.

I was grieving too, but I couldn't stop being a mother.

But I never took time.

I couldn't stop being a mother.

I can never stop being a father.

So lemme tell you what I pray. I know that you'll make amends with your child now. You know you'll start doing the work, but I pray that you watch this episode back alone and I hope that you watch and see our interaction. This is the gift that God has given you for you to watch yourself back with a trained professional to narrate what you're doing and use this as a moment and a tool to be better. Listen, I wish you all the best of luck in this. I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. But I hope you can grow together after this. Everyone stay with us, friends. We'll be right back with more.