I Haven't Had Sex With My Husband In TWO Years! | KARAMO

So tell me about your relationship with Steve.

Well, I'm going to tell you how we met first.

OK, please tell me that.

Well, my cousins took me out to a club. And as we were out at the club, you know, I'm from Detroit, so we get up and dance by ourselves.

Uh-huh. Is that what it is? Yeah.

OK. And as I was up there on the dance floor dancing, my husband's table was on the dance floor. So I'm kind of like in front of him, and he thinks another girl and me are competing for his affection, you know? Like, look at me, look at me. So after that, I was like, you wanna have a drink with me? And he said, you not from here, 'cause people in Memphis don't do that. So I said, I got up and I said, well, come over here and have a drink with me at this table. So as he said—

I wanna have a drink with you too, then I'll come here, okay?

Yeah, that's right.

So let me be clear, y'all are not having sex?

No, I haven't had sex with him.

And from your opinion, why not? 2 years, why not?

I asked the same question.

Uh-huh.

He tried to blame it on my health, but I had a heart attack in 2016.

Yeah.

You know, these last 2 years, I've been trying everything. I bought a stripper pole. I put the stripper pole in the house. I'm trying to— I'm trying to get on there, and I be like, uh.

Yes, ma'am. You know?

Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am.

Yes.

Yes, ma'am.

You know, he wouldn't perk up.

Yes.

I don't know what else to do.

I'm stuck.

So you don't sleep in the same bed with him anymore?

No, because my husband is having sex with a ghost.

Now that's a left turn I wasn't expecting.

You see his hands? Do you see where his hands is? He's like this. I'm not in that bed. He's been doing this. He's been doing this for a long time.

Let me tell you, of all the things I was expecting, that was not what I was expecting. That's a new definition of being ghosted. That's a new definition of being ghosted, 'cause I, that right there, hold on. So you're telling me, you're telling me he often simulates sex?

Every day.

Every day?

So I was like, I woke him up one day and I said, "What are you doing? You're at home with me. I'm your wife." Yes. He said, "I'm not doing anything.

I can't help what I do in my sleep." So because of this, you moved to the guest room?

Because of this, I moved to the guest room.

So let me be clear, he's sleeping in this picture?

He's sleeping.

He knocked out. So my producer is telling me right now that they saw the video. We couldn't play the full video, but he is simulating up and down as if someone is riding him in the video. Is he aroused in this?

Yes.

He's aroused.

He does this in the hot tub. He acts like somebody's in the hot tub with him. I mean, he's moving, he's grabbing like he's grabbing breasts, you know? And I'm like, something is going on. You are doing something and you thinking about somebody else 'cause it's not me.

It's not you.

But I touch him and he goes flat.

Oh, ooh, okay. Have you ever cheated on him?

No, I have not. You never cheated on him? Something's gotta give, so I called you.

Yes, okay, well we're gonna find. Well, I appreciate you calling me. Well everyone, let's meet Steve and hear his side of the story. So everyone, welcome Steve to the show.

Steve, why are y'all here doing this?

What are y'all talking about?

Why are y'all here telling me all these lies?

I'm lying, that's the proof of it.

Okay, you got all this dramatics out here and you showing out. Big deal.

I'm showing out?

You turning everything around on me like I'm guilty or something.

How can I turn it around when I have proof?

You got proof, but it's not the real proof.

What's not real?

Me sleeping. Me sleeping. How I'm supposed to know what I'm doing when I'm asleep?

Okay, but you're doing, I'm telling you you're doing it. I'm showing you you're doing it.

No, you never showed me that before.

Because I just got it.

You never showed me that before.

Okay, but you know you do it.

No, I don't, I'm asleep.

Thank you for being here, Steve. So take a seat for me. So I'm gonna first get this out the way. I'm gonna ask you directly, are you cheating on her?

No.

You're not cheating on her, okay.

I haven't cheated on her.

So I'm gonna ask you—

She give me plenty of reason to, but I'm not cheating on her.

Oh my God, I give you a reason? Are you serious right now? I'm at home cooking and cleaning and washing your dirty drawers, and I have to give you a reason not to cheat?

Yeah.

Why aren't you two having sex, from your opinion?

Yes! Yes, tell me that.

She knows. She knows I have a medical problem. And I'm not able to perform like I should.

That don't mean nothing, you can still do it.

Plus, when she was sick, she told me she wasn't interested in sex.

In 2016? What is it now?

And now you coming back talking about you wanna have sex?

What is it now, it's 2014.

But listen, when you said you weren't interested in having sex, I respected that because of your medical condition.

Don't you lie, you took Cialis every day.

I respected it.

You take that every day. Oh my God, this is crazy.

Yeah, I took the Cialis. It don't work like it's supposed to.

It don't work, honey, it don't work.

No.

Can I ask you this then? Because I understand intimacy and how that could be affected with both of you and where you are with your health, but when's the last time you kissed or held hands?

Uh. Ding, ding, ding. You shouldn't have to even think that long.

She don't like to kiss. Mm-hmm. She's never liked to kiss.

Okay.

I said okay, I deal with it. I know it'll probably change.

Okay.

But it never changed.

You gettin' off the subject. When was the last time you held my hand and walked with me?

The other day. I do it all the time.

Do you think she's cheating on you?

I suspect it.

'Cause you recently retired, right?

Yes.

And you're still working?

Right.

Okay, got it.

I don't understand how he can even say that 'cause I'm home all the time. We got cameras in every room of our house.

I'm gonna ask you this. Do you still wanna be married?

I want to, but she makes it hard for me 'cause—

Woo-hoo, you thought too long about that question.

I'm tired of this distrust.

Well, Steve, you want us to unlock her phone as well to see if Kissy has been receiving money from any man.

Money?

Mm-hmm. If Kissy has been texting with any other man.

I need to get some money from him 'cause he don't give me nothing.

And if Kissy has been tracking app on her phone. Those are things you want to know, correct? Right. Well, I think it's time to unlock the phone. Kissy?

Yes.

We unlocked your phone.

Okay.

Okay, here we go. Steve, you wanna know if Kissy has been receiving money from any men. Kissy says she has not. My Unlock the Phone investigator searched her phone and found that Kissy—

Is telling the truth.

Is telling the truth. Well, we did find something interesting on your calendar, which was very interesting. On your calendar, You have, can I see the graphic? You have sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.

Yeah, those are the days that I try.

Those are the days you try.

Yeah, I'm like, okay, I'm gonna get some sex tonight.

Steve, do you know that she was making notation of this?

No.

Got it, okay. Steve, you wanna know if Kissy has been texting with any other men. Kissy says she is not.

No, I said I didn't.

My unlock the phone investigator searched her texts and found that Kissy was not telling the truth. We found one suspicious text.

Yeah, which one though?

The one you said.

Yep, the one from my friend. I told you.

You didn't think you were gonna let me talk about sex with my ex-friend forever? Yeah, and you slapped me.

I told him to send me a picture.

Uh-huh.

I told him.

Okay, okay, okay, listen, she honest. You said it.

You think she's being honest? She never told me anything.

I did say I told him. She didn't tell you about this? I never told you that they sent me a private part picture?

Nope.

Don't lie, don't lie.

Who is this friend friend?

I can't say his name.

Okay, but does he know his name?

Yeah, he know him. I was with him before I met him.

Oh, so you said this a guy before?

Yes.

Okay, what do you know about this?

I don't know.

Okay, how is this making you feel right now, seeing this? 'Cause you seem shocked.

Yeah, I'm shocked.

Well, how you gonna be shocked when I told you about it?

You didn't tell me about it.

I never told you I had—

You always telling me that you're not doing nothing.

Why do I have to have pictures like that? Tell me.

Why do you have to have pictures?

Why do I have to look at another man's penis and get my own self off when you can do it?

Because you're not interested in me, I guess.

Oh my God.

Steve, you also wanna know if Kissy has any tracking apps on her phone. Kissy says she does not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her apps and found that Kissy is not telling the truth. She has an app downloaded called iFollowYou Pro. Okay, so.

So why does she have to follow me though? Did y'all see that?

This is when he's in the parking lot at work over there with you? Right, right. Okay.

That's not true.

Okay.

This is the problem with him.

Did I leave?

He's never telling the truth. So can we unlock his phone?

How can you say I'm lying? How can you say I'm lying?

I'm telling you, you do it.

I don't.

Oh my God. Now that's him. He getting ready to come out, y'all.

Don't I have reason?

What's wrong? Well, Steve, we unlocked your phone, so here we go. See, Kissy, you wanna know if Steve has been texting other women or discussing other women. Steve says he is not. My Unlock the Phone investigators searched his texts and found that Steve is telling the truth.

I don't know.

He's telling the truth. Kissy, you wanna know if Steve has been stopping at a woman's house after work. Steve says he is not. My Unlock the Phone investigator searched his GPS and found that Steve is telling the truth.

All right.

Kizzy, you wanna know if Steve has a secret folder on his phone? Steve says he does not. My Unlock the Phone investigator searched his phone and found that Steve is not telling the truth. He does have a hidden folder on his phone. Well, the folder is completely empty.

Yeah, 'cause he emptied it before we got here.

Okay. And we also have his phone because I asked him while we were here to show me the app that you're talking about. 'Cause I wanna see this app.

What type of photo are you talking about?

When I asked you to open up the photo with your face and you told me you were not gonna do it that day. And I did not, you don't even like me picking up your phone anymore.

That's what we do all the time. So what is the app that you're seeing?

Right there.

Oh, this is just—

No, it was something in there. He wouldn't show me what it was.

Here we go.

He know it's there. He know it's there. Trying to act like he don't know.

What app she show you?

I am not crazy. That app right there on the bottom. Who taught you how to do that, first of all?

So what I'm trying to show you is because we didn't find anything, but I want to show you again. So I just had him unlock. There's nothing that's coming up.

Right, but I asked, this is what I asked to see. And he wouldn't even open it up that day.

Okay, so what this is is that you can drag from your photos to the, it's going on your main screen, but if there's nothing in there, it's gonna come up like it's something there.

Right, but when I looked at it.

So I just wanna make sure, I just showed you from here, if you deleted something in there, we would've found it in the deleted photos, 'cause we go into back from things that are deleted. You know, if it's in the iCloud, we gonna find it.

Yeah.

But there's nothing in here that's been deleted. And so that's what I'm trying to show you right now.

Well, why would he not let me see it if it was nothing in it?

I actually honestly believe that he doesn't know that it was there. Okay, if I can tell you my assessment of what I've seen here, I think that there's a couple things at play here. I think that there's an extreme lack of intimacy.

Yes.

And that intimacy is causing heartache, it's causing the communication to break down and it's also causing narratives to be created in our minds that may not be true. And I think sometimes when we forget in relationships, when we don't have somebody who is going to tell us what's going on, we end up filling in the blanks. And I think what's happening right now is there is a little bit, and I'm gonna be honest with you, especially going after this, where you're filling in blanks. It's like if he ain't come for me and I'm right here and I got all this and I'm beautiful, then there gotta be somebody else. There has to be somebody else. And I think what has happened through that of you accusing him has caused you to feel like, you know what, I need a break. And this is all you saying that you're trying to take a break for yourself because you're tired of the constant arguments and accusations. Am I right?

Mostly right, yeah.

What part am I not right about?

Coming home, I don't hesitate on coming home. Like I said, if I'm stopping to get something to eat or gas or lottery tickets, sometimes situations happen. You stuck in traffic sometimes.

I get that. I understand that.

Sometimes people at the store is moving slow. You have to stand in line and wait on them.

But you ain't rushed to get home sometimes. And it's okay for you to admit that.

I mean, that's not it. That's not it.

Yeah, if she getting on my nerves, I ain't gonna rush home.

I mean, 'cause I know Say that. What happens when you don't say that and you say things like traffic and say things like, I'm at the gas station and people taking long, that gives her an opportunity to fill in blanks. And then with her in the dark, she's gonna think that all this other stuff is going on because there's no intimacy and there's no communication. But what's going on is that you're keeping everything inside. Mm, no. Do you love your wife?

Yes, I love my wife.

And do you wish you could get back to the place where y'all used to be?

Yes, it would be real nice.

Talk to her about that real quick. Talk to her.

Well, you don't seem like you want it from me.

Well, how can I fix that?

Boom.

Instead of bringing me down, accusing me, just try to be more comforting to me.

All right.

More understanding. Don't suggest or think the worst thing right off.

Okay, I'll try really hard to stop that.

And now she's also told you, 'cause she says she's gonna try, she's also telling you you've left her. So she said you don't even hold her anymore. So if she's gonna be comforting to you, what is some action that you can do to show her like, I wanna bring you in, I don't want you to feel alone?

Well, I can hold you more. I can hold your hand more when we go places. Or even when we just sitting watching TV, I can hold your hand then.

See, what y'all have done right now is a first step. Instead of defending, you start to hear each other. I promise y'all, y'all gonna take the first steps towards intimacy because your intimacy issues, more than you know it, is not about here, it's more about up here. Y'all gonna be all right. Y'all gonna be all right. Move her in closer. There you go. See, this one of them lessons. Grab her in closer now. There you go. Hold her tight.