I Never Got To Call Him Dad! | KARAMO

So Angelique, tell me, why do you have doubts about who your father is?

Mainly because he's the one that's always made comments that he wasn't.

Oh, so it's directly from him?

It's directly from him.

Okay, so did you have a father growing up?

I did, he wasn't in the household where I grew up in, but he was always present. He was the one to throw me up in the air and catch me and paint my fingernails and read to me and things like that.

So then who raised you?

My aunt.

Your aunt raised you?

Yeah, I was in the household with my aunt and my grandparents and it was my sister. Who I supposedly share the same mother and father with. So yeah, it was just us two.

And why didn't your mother raise you?

She didn't raise us for, I guess, numerous reasons, but primarily the one, the main important one was we were abused physically, emotionally, and we had representatives from Department of Children and Family Services come to our schools and ask us questions about it. They saw it, and as a result, we were removed from the home.

And then you lived with your aunt-grandmother. Okay then. And both you and your sister. And so your entire life you thought that you two had the same mother and father.

Yeah.

Until this man started saying.

I mean, it's been my life. Like he, ever since I was born, you know, I grew up hearing that. I grew up feeling like I was the black sheep of the family, feeling isolated. So.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's unfair, I'm sorry.

Where's the tissue?

I know, right? I got you.

Give me the box.

I know.

Thank you.

I am sorry though. I've said this a million times on the show. One of the things that breaks my heart is when adults make decisions and then they put stress on a child, hurt on a child, and pain on a child because they don't wanna handle it. Because your alleged father, his name is Jack, right?

Yeah.

If he had doubts, he could have easily handled that within a day. Exactly.

For a prime example, what didn't make sense is he told us both, you don't have to call me dad. You can just call me Jack. And in my mind I'm like, What father would want to be robbed of that experience if you know we're yours? So the fact that he was like, "You can call me Jack," I'm like, "Okay, well Jack it is." And that's who he's been. Jack, Jack, Jack.

Jack, Jack, Jack, got it. So did you ever have a good relationship with him? A strong relationship?

No, it's just strange for sure. Like, you know, he's always been around.

And what's your relationship with him like now?

Same.

Same, okay then. Same. Well, I just wanna let y'all know, everyone at home and here in the audience, Her potential father, Jack, did agree to a DNA test, but he refused to be on the show. Are there other men who you believe could be your potential father?

Well, yeah, my other siblings' dad could possibly be my dad if it comes back that Jack is not my father.

Got it. And how's the relationship with your mom right now?

Also estranged.

Also estranged. Okay then, nevermind.

Like, we speak, but you know, it's just casual. Like, hey, how you doing? That's the extent.

Got it. And why do you think that is?

It's really difficult to develop a relationship when, you know, the foundation wasn't there to begin with. You know, I grew up feeling like neither one of my parents wanted me. Wow. So it's a lot difficult for me to just say, oh, I want this relationship when it never felt mutual.

Yeah.

Little backstory, my aunt took me in when I was only 9 days old, whereas she took my sister in when she was 9 months old.

Oh wow.

And from what I was told my whole life, I would be my aunt's child and Tracy would come back for Alize.

Got it.

And so again, another traumatic thing. Why come back for one child and not the other?

The other.

Yeah.

Got it.

Why come back?

What would you like your relationship to be like with your aunt? How do you feel about your mom? If there was a chance for it to be, using your words, mutual, would you be open to it?

Yeah, for sure. I mean, I feel like we do have somewhat of a mutual relationship. Like, we communicate with each other, we call each other, we talk even just to say hi. I would say we have a better rapport than me and Jack. I won't speak with him unless he speaks to me. And his whole ordeal is, you know, my birthday's in August, his thing is in December. You didn't call me for my birthday. I said, well, what was mine? In August.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm like, I'm the child here.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So. Agreed. Well, Angelique's mother Tracy is here, so everyone please help me welcome Tracy to the show. Hi, how are you?

Good, how are you?

I'm good, thank you. You look nice.

Thank you.

Let me ask you just directly, So why didn't you raise Angelie?

Because lies was told on me. False lies that I abused my children and I didn't.

How was it lies? I didn't mean to cut her off, but how was it lies when we got, when we had representatives come to our school and sit down and talk with us and they saw it? How was it lies?

They didn't see anything.

But they did though, because—

Excuse me.

They did though.

No, they didn't. They lied.

So, Representative lied? The representative lied? Yes, they did. Okay, so you're also saying that I'm lying when you even admitted it to me yourself that you beat me with a high-heeled shoe?

Yeah, but that's not abuse. That's a spanking. That's a spanking. That's a spanking. That's not abuse. Abuse is different when you put bruises, okay?

It's gonna leave a mark.

No. When you put bruises on a person—

And that's probably why you had her strip bare booty naked so no one could see underneath the clothes.

But again, I did not abuse you. I spanked you with a shoe on your bottom.

Okay.

Okay? That's what I did.

Repetitive beatings, so they did not say I could not order off items.

They did not say I could not spank you. They did not say that. They just said, just be aware of how you spank that child. Which you didn't learn.

So if they found no effects of neglect or abuse, then why did she not come home with you?

And I'mma tell you because I was going back and forth about custody. And every time I went back and forth, it was always a lie being told.

Okay, well, tell it to him and tell it to everybody here that wasn't the agreement was you would come back for holidays and leave me? Tell the truth. Yeah.

Okay. But—

So it's still on his side.

Yeah, that's the only truth. And then after I had her, I was homeless. Okay? So I didn't have nowhere for her to go or myself. So I had to find a way for my kids to be taken care of while I got on my feet. I came to Georgia, then I established a place to live, a job, and then that's when I say, okay, I want both of 'em back. That's when the custody battle started to go on between me.

10+ years.

Yeah, 10+ years, that's right. If I didn't want you, I wouldn't be fighting for you for 10 years. Okay? Back and forth, 10 years. You don't know what I was going through.

So you didn't give her away as a child? Mm-mm. They got taken away?

They got taken away.

Okay.

My parents were nice.

Over 10 years, what was the argument why you couldn't get her back? They were saying you're not stable or what was it?

All kinds of stuff. I wasn't stable, I didn't have a place to live, just those two things.

And how do you feel the relationship is with her now?

I mean, I love her. I always loved her, okay? But she was raised in believing certain things that went on, and which is not true.

So what needs to happen to improve your relationship?

Just more communication.

Mm-hmm.

I mean, we have spent time for my birthday. We went out, she took me out for my birthday.

And again, I told you I have a better relationship with her than I do with Jack.

Jack, yeah, makes sense.

But that's because she has made more of an effort Yeah. Where he has not made any effort.

Got it. Do you have doubts about who her father is?

No.

You have no doubts?

No.

You know it's him?

I never, never told him. I never told her or anybody in my family that it could be somebody else or another possibility. It was never nobody that.

So then in your opinion, why does he deny her?

I don't know. I can't think what he's processing. I never told him.

Yeah. What was your relationship like with her? And her alleged father, Jack?

We got along sometimes and we didn't. When we broke up, I was pregnant with her and I caught him cheating. So, you know, and he didn't think I was pregnant with her. And I'm like, okay, believe what you wanna believe.

Yeah.

He said that outta his own mouth, stating that when he looked down at all his kids, it was no denying. But when he looked at me, he raised an eyebrow. So.

Got it.

You know.

Is there any possibility, I gotta ask him, that any other man could be her father?

No.

None at all?

None.

Well, I think it's time to find out the DNA truth. Okay. Are you ready? I want you to come in. Angelique, in this envelope is the truth of who you are. Since you were a child, you have had to live with your other family members because of situations with the courts and with your mother. And even during that time, the man who you thought was your father was around but would still deny you. And all those years caused pain, anger, hurt, and you have left with doubts of who you are. But in this envelope, it will let you know who you are and where you come from. This is your truth to open, not mine. So I wish you the best of luck, okay? Thank you.

Before I even open this, I wanna say it's not gonna change nothing. It's not gonna change anything at the end of the day. The dude wasn't around. He had a chance to be present and he didn't want to. So whether he is or whether he's not, it's not gonna alter or change the trajectory of my life. I got here on my own efforts by the grace of God.

So.

I'm shaking, y'all.

Woo!

Angelique, Jack is your biological father.

Woo! Okay.

Okay, that's fine.

Well, we got that chapter closed.

How does it feel to know?

It feels good because now we know for sure.

Yeah.

If anything, Jack can be an asshole all he wants, but Him trying to call her out her name and things like that, that has to stop. It has to cease.

Everything has to stop now.

It has to stop now.

Yeah.

'Cause I'm tired of it. Like, he got 4 baby mamas. I'm the only one he put through the mud. It tears me apart. She don't understand what I went through. Nobody don't understand what I went through of what I had to separate my 3 other kids from those 2 that I had, my last 2. So they didn't grow up with their siblings. Okay, they missed out. I missed out on seeing them doing what they do.

Well, I'll tell you, working in child protective services, there's two things that I know to be true is that you can remove some children without removing others based on the abuse or neglect that child has. And if it's not discovered that the other children have that, then we might make a case to say that these children can stay while an investigation is done, but this one needs to be removed.

Yeah.

And so I'm not going to dispute your truth or not. I will tell you this, I do believe the fact when you say no one understands what I went through, I do believe it because I can read through the lines. When you talked about abuse and how you see abuse, it really informed a lot for me because it means that the way that you were treated as a child informed you that that is what is normal. And we forget that, which is why we all had the reaction because none of us were raised like that. And so that informs me, let me know that there was, abuse that you had, there was neglect you had, you felt alone, you felt lost, you felt rejected. And so you had to go on your own journey to figure out your own life. And on that journey, you still did try. The 10 years informs me to be there. But I'll tell you that though I see you, I need you to see her now.

Yeah, I always have.

Hear me out, hear me out. I do believe you always have. But the part that I have realized here that probably keeping y'all to not have the closer relationship is that there are facts that she has, truths that she has, that instead of loving her through those truths, you're fighting against her when it comes to those truths. And that will always keep the relationship not close. I see you nodding your head yes. I'm hitting it? Because the thing is, is that when you've been abandoned or feel like you've been abandoned, when you feel like you've been rejected, You fighting against that instead of loving her through that will always keep there just to be this one little wall between you two where she feels like, well, maybe my mama still don't love me and my mama still don't want me. So the advice that I'd give you, because I know that you want to have relationship with her, now when she says her truth, you ain't gotta fight against it because you can put in the back of your mind, you know what, when I was on Karamo, he saw me, he made sure his audience saw me. So now you don't gotta fight her truth anymore. You can love her through her truth.

And most of the time it's kind of difficult for me to even express how I'm feeling 'cause I'm always getting invalidated.

You're gonna cry, I got it.

So it's like, why even speak on how I feel when you gonna try to shut me down and try to debate that every time? I'm just like, listen, just listen. This is what I had to go through. This is what I experienced. This is what I felt during that time.

I know.

I know.

I know. I mean, we both, we all went through it.

So this is where this lesson, not only for her, for you as a mother can make your relationship closer with all of them if you take my advice. Because, but hear me out. Remember, remember, this is your, this is the gift I'm trying to give you.

Yeah, I know.

We all heard it and saw your truth. So now you don't have to worry about defending no more. We hear you, we see you, we don't think you bad. We know you went through some stuff and we know you fought. And you tried the hardest you could against a system and against people, but now it's time to put your sword down and open your arms and just hug her.

Mm-hmm, okay.

I promise you, if you can do that, I believe your relationship will get closer and that will heal half of the abandonment that she's felt, okay? Mm-hmm. Now to you, Jack, at home. Jack, you have had Almost 26 years of denying this woman, and enough is enough. The truth is here, and I need you to know, because I know you gonna watch this in your house, that her wounds can be healed, but it needs to be done by you applying effort, acknowledging what you said in the past as wrong. Don't defend it, and be patient with her. If you can remember those 3 things, Jack, you might be able to establish a relationship with your daughter. Yes. And you deserve to know what an amazing woman she is. You deserve all the love in the world. Thank you. And you deserve all the answers, and I'm glad that you could be here to get your first answer, okay? Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you. Please take my advice. Thank you for being vulnerable. I'm glad you got your answers, and everyone stay with us, friends. We'll be right back with more. Hey, Lee.

Hey, how you doing? I'm good, you? I'm great. So we just got off the show and I got the results. You are my father. How about that?

Oh, right.

Yeah.

Okay, well, how you feel?

I feel—

I'm glad they turned out the way it did. Everybody can stop the bullying and whatnot and move on forward.

All right, I appreciate that.

All right, talk to you later.

All right.

Okay, babe.