A man explains why he's afraid to date a woman with kids, tracing it back to a past relationship where he felt like an outsider. His own parents' comments reinforced the belief he wouldn't truly belong in a blended family, and that fear still shapes who he'll commit to.
We have a great relationship, a great bond. I feel like once the title thing hit, it's gonna be an issue.
Why is that something that you feel like it's gonna be an issue?
Because it's happened before.
It's been an issue for you in the past?
Yes.
So the titles from the past caused you some problems, and so now you're like, "Uh-uh." Okay, I'm gonna get back to them past relationships, but I wanna get to my audience to figure out, I wanna take to the comments and hear what y'all gotta say about this. Any y'all got some comments on this?
Yes! Come on over.
What's your comment?
Do you think that you're just nervous to move into a new relationship because of the issues that you experienced in the past?
Most definitely.
So what are the issues you experienced in the past?
Man, it's deep. This is real.
We got time.
The real commitment I think the issue was from my last because I had issues with having the family dynamic and it wasn't, I didn't really feel like it was my family.
And—
What made you feel like it wasn't your family?
Because I wasn't the father. I grew up in a home where it was my mother and my father. So just knowing that I'm not.
But something had to trigger that feeling. So usually in most cases, there's somebody has said something that now sticks in your subconscious. So was it her ex? Was it the man that she had the children with? Was it her? Was it your mother and father? Who was it that put this message in your head that like, these babies ain't really yours, you know that, right? Who was it that said something to you?
At the time, probably parents and—
Your parents. So your parents didn't like this woman that you were dating prior and they reminded you that those are not your kids.
Not so much of didn't like, but just more so of listening to me speak to them and then, you know, having their own input.
So your parents mean a lot to you?
Yeah, most definitely.
And your parents' opinions mean a lot to you?
Yeah.
Boom, got it. We don't need no more questions here. Got it, let's go back.
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