It Took My Mom 21 Years To Find My Father! | KARAMO

I have to ask you, first of all, how did you find out about Chris?

Well, I came to stay with my mom at 16. She kind of told me about it. However, I didn't reach out to him until I downloaded this app and I searched his name and then it came up with his address, his number, and I was like, let me call it.

Oh yeah.

So when I called it, at first it went to voice message. Called it again, went to voice message again. Then he called me back. But he thought I was a scam at first. So then I started asking him questions. At first I was like, you know my mom? He was like, oh yeah, she had a little kid. I'm like, at first I thought he was talking about my other sibling, but I was like, no, I'm that kid. Like, I'm your daughter. He was like, I don't got no other kids, those are my two kids. So I'm like, so I started asking him questions and then he was like, wait a minute.

And how long ago was this?

Like a month ago.

A month ago?

Yeah.

Wow. So why didn't your mom raise you?

She raised me to about 8 and then she was around the wrong crowd, made the wrong decisions and then I went to foster care.

Got it. So did you communicate with your mom at all during that time when you were in foster care?

Towards the end, somebody friended me at school and they was like, I know your mom. I'm like, huh? She was like, "Yeah, she goes with my dad." I'm like, "Oh." And she was like, "Here's her number." So, you know me, I was in school, I got an app on the computer and I called my mom. Once I talked to her and stuff like that, that's when I started running away from my foster home to go find my mom.

Got it.

Yeah, then—

Can you tell my producers that you blame your mom for all this?

Yeah, because I feel as though she made the right decisions and chose better people to be around, I would've never went through what I went through.

So when did she finally tell you that Chris could be your dad?

When I started running away, told her what happened and stuff, she went to court, they finally gave her custody back. She let me know that I had, the guy that was on my birth certificate wasn't in real fact my father, he was just somebody that was there, but I have a different dad.

So how's your relationship with your mom now?

It's good, but it's shaky.

Okay, what makes it shaky?

We bump heads a lot.

Did you get into a fight with her recently?

Yes, like—

Was it physical or just verbal?

Verbal, but things got thrown.

Oh wow, what happened?

My mom has a habit of telling my business. And I was like, well, since you wanna tell my business, let's tell what you've been doing.

Oh God.

But that's for a different story. And then we got into it and yeah.

So since you contacted Chris a month ago, how's your relationship been like with him?

It's okay. I mean, we don't talk every day. There was a time when me and my mom had got into it. He called me out my name and I felt some type of way that did hurt me 'cause I'm like, if you are—

Chris called you outta your name?

Yeah. He said I was being a, yeah. But I was like, you not like, from a person that goes through some stuff and like you're just now meeting me and I could be your daughter, why would you do that?

Like. Yeah, yeah, I got it. Does he think he can be your dad?

He has some doubts.

What questions do you have for your mom today?

Why she wait so long? It took me a day just to find him and it took her 21 years. Oh.

Did you know who your baby daddy was at first?

"So you gonna do this? Okay." But guess what? I went and got a DNA test. You didn't till now.

I didn't.

That's right, because I had no intentions in the beginning until I got older.

It doesn't matter.

Until I got older. It still doesn't matter, but don't go there.

Don't go there with me. It doesn't matter. I got questions that you need to answer.

That's right, I don't have to answer nothing. I don't owe you nothing. Nothing. I told you his name. You can go for him. I don't even want nothing to do with him.

You say you ain't want nothing to do with him, cool. You didn't have to have nothing to do with him, but when I was born, you didn't have to talk to him. You could have reached out to his family.

I told him I was pregnant. It doesn't matter. I told him I was pregnant.

Okay.

He asked me where we stood, basically. I said, you stand on one side of the street, I stand on the other. You don't come on my side, I don't come on yours. So you wanna blame somebody? Blame him.

I'm not blaming just you, it's both of y'all.

No, him too.

It's both of y'all. Him too.

Both. Him too.

Both. Him too.

Y'all both was wrong.

So what? And you were wrong too at times too, sweetheart.

Okay, we made mistakes, but this, you don't feel like you did nothing wrong?

You know what, guess what? People can't control, people make mistakes every day of their life. Every day of their life they make mistakes and they can't control it. You think I'm proud of things I did in my past? No, I'm not, but guess what? I've changed my life around. Do you think that I would change anything in my past? Absolutely not. You wanna know why? Because my past makes me who I am today. I was given a second chance.

But your past is what caused me to go through what I went through.

You know what, guess what? It might have, but I can't control I can't control how they treated you inside that house.

Did you know that she was being taken? I did not know. You did not know?

I did not know. And as soon as I found out, guess what I did?

What?

I fought for her. I got her back. I was the first woman to get guardianship back of their daughter after they were adopted.

Yeah, but I went to you.

It doesn't matter. I didn't have to let you back into my life. You were adopted. I could have watched you from afar.

But I mean, you—

I didn't have to come back. I didn't have to come back.

But you was watching from afar 'cause you came and was a family to somebody else but not me.

Exactly, but guess what, that's 'cause I reached out for you. That was because I wanted you in my life.

After you was already helping raise somebody else's kids.

Oh, well.

That is what it is. I moved on, you were adopted.

I'm your kid!

You were adopted!

If I was, listen, if I was to go through what you went through and I had a kid that was in foster care, as soon as I got home, I was gonna find my kid.

Guess what? As soon as I got home, I looked for you. What did I do?

You looked, but you didn't fight. You should've fought right then and there.

How do you figure?

You should've, just like when I started running to you and then you decided to go to court, you should've did everything that you can to see what you could do to get me back.

I did. I don't like drama in my life, okay? She thrives on it. Mm-hmm. I don't. I have 4 grandkids that I'm raising right now that I have custody of. I don't got time for it.

Do you think she really lives on the drama or do you think she— Absolutely. Do you think that she's hurting from her past and it comes up a certain way.

She's probably, there probably is pain from her past. I'm not gonna say she ain't got pain, but guess what? I went down that same path too as a child.

Can I say something?

Of course you can.

That's another thing that hurts me. Like you're raising them kids, but the stuff that you're doing for them, I didn't get to experience that. You're right. Like it hurts me to see like, okay, you didn't want them kids to go into foster care, but you let us go into foster care. You're right. Like that hurts too. And that's what most of that stuff is. Like when I see that stuff, I do get mad because I'm like, bro, I was that kid once and I didn't get none of that.

It doesn't matter, guess what? I tried and when I had you, I gave you a good life. And I didn't start doing my things until I lost my kids. When I lost my kids, I lost my whole world. I didn't care if I died. And you know what? I was given a second chance. I might not have got it right with you and your sister, but I will get it right with these little ones.

Okay, you had a right to get it right for us too and you chose not to.

I didn't choose not to. I did a long time in jail. Let's talk about it.

You just said that with your grandkids, you're gonna make it right. But when your daughter asks you, could you change anything, the mistakes you made before, you said you wouldn't.

No, because you know what?

Why is it that you feel like you would change for these kids, but you won't change for you?

I won't change my past.

Well, we're not asking you to change your past. We're just asking, your daughter's basically asking you to acknowledge it.

Oh, right. But what am I supposed to change?

Again, no one's asking you to change it. None of us have that power, but she's asking you to acknowledge it.

I have acknowledged it.

It doesn't matter.

She was 8 when she went into foster care.

Yes, she was. And I was incarcerated.

Got it. Well listen, at the end of the day, we're also here for a DNA mystery. You need to know who your father is. Do you believe that Chris is her father?

Absolutely.

So why did it take you so long since you've gotten your life back together to reach out to him?

As I got older, I felt as though she had a right to know who her father was, 'cause there could be medical issues, there could be anything, you know? And she might need him or he might need her. And I found out there's other sisters. She has a right to know her siblings and have a relationship with them.

I think it's time that we meet Chris and we get to Chris's side of the story. So everyone, please welcome the very important person in this story, Chris, to the show. So this is your first time in 22 years seeing each other?

Yes, sir.

Absolutely.

Chris, how do you feel about what was just said?

It's kind of a lot. And just hearing some of the things that I heard with the anger and the miscommunication with everything, it's kind of bothering, but it's like, I can understand from some points, you know, Rose is young.

If you would've known about her, would you have gotten her out of foster care?

I probably would've tried. I wasn't perfect myself, so I was not completely available to do so, honestly.

Okay.

So it's just, I mean, she was neglected from that end, but I also have other kids that was neglected too because of it.

Got it, okay. Are you upset that Rose didn't tell you that you might have had a daughter?

If she did inform me that, you know, she was pregnant, I really don't remember it. There was things going on at the moment where I was exiting the relationship and, but I didn't hear anything so I didn't believe it. So many years later, this is like 2015 or '16, I end up having a job that I was working at and someone approached me and says, "You know, you have a kid." And I'm like, "No." Yeah, got it, got it. No, I was dealing with my situation at the time and the timeframe didn't add up and I was like, "You completely have me wrong here." Got it.

So what did you think when Amber called you? I know she said you hung up twice 'cause you thought it was a scam.

Yeah, when she was just first, I was like, "Yep, scam." So I was like, "Cool." The number called me back and I was like, I was like, okay, scams don't call back to back. So I was like, let me see what's going on here. So I was like, hello. So she saw, she was like, are you Chris? And started asking me these questions. And I'm like, wait a minute. You know too many people in my life from my past. Like, what's going on here? And she's like, I'm your daughter. I'm like, okay, listen, I don't have any money. I don't have anything, but you know, whatever you want. And she's like, I want nothing. "I just wanna know who you are." That's sweet. So I'm just like—

Is this your first time seeing each other?

Yes.

As well?

We've been talking on the phone.

You only talked on the phone? What does it feel like looking at him for the first time?

Yeah, I'm just—

I don't know how to feel. It's just, I don't know.

Yeah. If this is your father, do you hope to have a relationship with him?

Yeah. I grew up without a real father figure. Yeah, I have the person she's dealing with that's been in my life, but I just grew up without one. So like certain stuff that I needed from both sides only got from the one side.

Okay.

So.

Well, we're about to get to the DNA answers and get the truth of this matter. But before we do this, I just have to give a little bit of advice here. I saw the cantankerous relationship that you two had together and it breaks my heart because I can also see that you're trying, that there's love there, that you wanna be better., but you kept saying things like, I don't owe you anything. Your exact words were, I don't have to tell you anything and I don't owe you nothing. I can't control my past. But in actuality, you can control the past and you control it by owing her and giving her what she desires, which is the ability, like I just said to him, to ask the questions and for you just to listen. And she deserves to hear and ask all the questions she wants. So when you say things like, I don't owe her anything and I don't have to tell her anything, that will always cause y'all to bump heads. You can't change the past.

You can't change the past. But you can give advice and love, but it's their decision to take it.

Yeah. I take what I went through, I put towards my son. Right. And he has a better life.

She's trying. I'm proud of her. I ain't gonna lie to you. She's an amazing mom.

Good.

She does great with her son.

Good. Let me tell you something. What you just did right here was you took the first step of taking my advice and just giving her more love. And the way y'all are communicating right here, just stick with this love. I promise you your relationship is gonna be better.

She knows I'm proud of her. I tell her all the time.

I'm sure.

We talk every day. We're together every day.

I know, I know, I know. And this is not to challenge the mother you are, but it's to give you just a little bit more tools.

We might talk every day, but there's still stuff that I hold inside.

Oh, exactly. And there's still stuff I hold inside as well.

See, so if you can do that, I promise you, you'll get better. But at the end of the day now, it's time for the answers. Amber, are you ready to get this DNA truth so that you can get the closure and start the first step in this new life you'll have? Yeah. The answer's yours, Amber.

Chris is your biological father.

You got answers.

Well, the best— What'd you got? One thing for certain and two things for sure.

I know who I said. What are your thoughts right now?

Well, at least I know who my dad is now.

It's shock. It's a lot of shock. There's a lot of healing you have to go through that you deserve to go through. And there's a lot of support that you deserve. And at least now you know you have both of your parents, you know who they are. And are your sisters here? Are your daughters here? Can we bring them out? 'Cause I want you to meet your sisters as well. They're Jasmine and Alexis. You wanna meet your sisters?

Crazy. Crazy.

Nice to meet you, Jasmine and Alexis. Hi. This is your sister now. Hold on, come on. Meet your sister first.

So pretty.

Thank you.

So are you guys. You guys are beautiful. We all look alike.

Y'all do look alike. You do look alike.

You guys are so pretty.

How's it feel to know that this is your sister?

It's crazy. When I first seen the picture, I was like, she definitely looks like us and a lot like him.

Yeah.

Like, you can really see it side by side now.

Yeah. Chris, how do you feel about this?

It's overwhelming, but I mean, I see there's a lot of A lot of things in there that maybe I can help, you know, mend out, relief, you know, stress today before you can actually let go of whatever anger or hate that you have in you or pain, whatever it could be. And hopefully mend it out so that we can actually live a more peaceful life now that you actually have the answers that you need, to be honest with you. Good.

Look, this is your family. You have your family now. Thank you. Good for you. I love you. I wish you all the best of luck, sincerely. Want more unlocked phones, DNA reveals, and family drama? Then make sure you're subscribed to the Karamo Show YouTube.