In this episode of Co‑Parenting Unlocked, Karamo sits with his former partner Stephanie and their biological son Jason (joining remotely) to talk openly about their adopted son Chris, whom they call Milo. The conversation reveals that Chris, now 20, has been estranged from the family after a series of risky and self‑destructive behaviors—including involvement with guns, theft, and a bipolar diagnosis that led him to stop his medication. Karamo and Stephanie describe the painful decision to set firm boundaries, limiting contact when Chris’s actions became threatening and enabling. They discuss the emotional toll of the separation, their lingering love for Chris, and the hope that he will eventually seek help. Both parents emphasize accountability, the danger of enabling, and their willingness to provide financial and emotional support once Chris is ready to engage in treatment. The episode ends with Karamo inviting viewers to share their own experiences with children struggling with mental‑health or behavioral crises, positioning the discussion as both a personal narrative and a broader parenting resource.
Chapters
Let me not sit up here and just make it seem like me and Stephanie are the best parents in the world. Jason going to come on here tomorrow and he going to tell y'all exactly how you feel about us. Okay. Hey friends, it's me, Karamo. We're here with another episode of Co-Parenting Unlocked, and I'm here with my son's mother, Stephanie. Hey, baby mama.
Hey, baby daddy.
So we've been getting deep, but this is a subject that you and I have never talked about. So as you all know, Stephanie and I have one biological son together. His name is Jason. Our son Jason is joining us remotely right now from California. Jason, you did— oh. Not the cowboy hat. But she also has another son that I helped raise and took custody of named Chris, who I love to death. But there's been a couple of years that people haven't heard me talk about Chris because Chris and I, our relationship is estranged.
Yeah.
Stephanie still sees Chris and talks to Chris.
I do regularly, yes.
Regularly, yes. And our relationship has been estranged because at 20 years old, Chris was going through some issues. And I was like, you can't keep doing these things. This was like—
Yeah.
There was some— I'm going to be real— guns involved.
Yeah.
It was like—
Yeah. Yes. So he definitely got under some negative influences.
Girl.
And—
Girl.
I'm going to say, Karamo, you stepped in at a very pivotal time in Christian's life where he was under some influences that were out of my control. You know, at that time, I was single mom working. Trying to keep things afloat, doing, you know, handling my business. And that calls for my attention to kind of be more on work and surviving versus Christian's interactions with whoever he was hanging around with and the influences he had. So yeah, he made some very bad choices.
Yeah, I mean—
He did some messed up stuff.
I love that boy still to this day.
Yeah.
And the problem is that the last time I saw him, he actually decided to leave my house. I didn't kick him out the house. Right. I told him that he had to start trying and doing better. This was also— he stopped taking medication.
Yes.
For his bipolar.
Yes. Let's talk about it.
And that played into, I think, some of these decisions.
Yes.
And he left. Jason and I were at the house, and he was like, you know what? I'm gone. And it was always a heartbreak for me because I was like, I'm not kicking you out. I'm not throwing you out.
Why are you doing this?
I just need you to be—
why are you doing this?
I need you to be better right now. But you know, he was in that space.
Yeah.
And then he kind of went all over the world and, and, you know, made it back home. Yeah. To you.
Yeah. And let's talk about more about that, Karamo, then, because you just touched on something that's really important. I don't want us to gloss over it, but the fact that he is diagnosed with bipolar— I'll go ahead and say that's coming from my side of the family. I'm also diagnosed with bipolar depression and, uh, PTSD.
Yeah.
And so again, all of that was learning you know, for me. And so once I started to learn, I could understand more of where the kids are coming from.
And you've been such a great mother when it comes to that.
Thank you.
You navigate that very well.
But thank you, Karamo. I appreciate that. But I want to say that a number of the decisions, the dramatic episodes, I want to say that they were manic. I want to say that he was off of his medication. I want to say that it was self-sabotage and a number of things going on. But I understand why we had to put some space between you and him because what he was doing was too much.
It breaks my heart, though. And the only reason we said that is space is because I told him he sends texts, and sometimes the text would be, I love you, I miss you. And the next text would be like, F you, kick your asthma.
Too.
Yeah. Because they get too aggressive.
Too aggressive.
Yeah. And so the way I left it was, when you're ready to get help, I'm here.
Yes.
And as we saw a while ago, he had said he wanted to get help, and I responded immediately.
Yes.
And then he didn't.
He dropped the ball. He just didn't do it.
And then that changed.
Yeah.
And so we're still in this space. Yeah. Because I think sometimes as parents, we forget that even though he's a child and I will be here for him forever, and as you will, at what point do you decide that this child who's making decisions, even though they've been told they can get help and that they're here for them, at what point do you say, well, I got to step back because I can't have you sink all ships?
Yeah, well—
Because that's what was starting to go on. It was like sinking Jason's ship. It was sinking—
Trying to come for you, trying to come for me. Listen, I 100% understand and get where you're coming from.
And that's a hard decision for us as parents.
Yeah, but it's— a very necessary one. And I'm gonna say this because on the subject of parental guilt, so we're talking about accountability in adult children, right? So we can't keep on enabling. I think at a point where I may have been thinking I'm exercising grace and being more loving and nurturing, what I was doing was enabling a behavior so that he's lost accountability. He don't know how to come back and now, you know, correct that because I'm handing them, it's okay, you'll be all right. No, when the facts of the matter was You have boundaries. You can express yourself, but you don't cross the line. When it becomes personal attacks, when you putting threats in the mixture— When you stealing stuff. When you stealing. Yeah, when you stealing, you can't even be around me. Let's get that straight. Like, when you cannot be trusted, it's necessary. And yes, it's hard and it hurts. But like you said, for anybody, you have to put space between that situation. So right now, where Christian is in the headspace, he's doing better.
He is.
I'm going to say that he is— he is— coming around. And I think that in the relationship being estranged and like your absence is really giving him time to think about his decisions and how they affect him long term. And, you know, he wants to apologize to you. I know for sure, Karamo. He's very—
he's hurt. He's very bad. So can I tell you the thing is he don't have anything to apologize to me about. You know that. We talked about this. He don't got nothing to apologize to me about. I just need him to say I'm ready to get help. That's all I need. Yeah, I don't need to apologize. You're, you're a kid. You don't need to apologize to me. You're still trying to figure out how to grow and do this stuff, but you have to take the step, and I can't take that step for you.
Yeah.
And so, yeah, yeah. And I mean, I miss it, you know. We, Jason, we talk about him every day. We miss him. Yeah. Because y'all don't understand, Chris is my superstar. This is— that boy is— his nickname is Milo because I call him my little one, because I believe his personality is so like mine that when we were together, people used to actually think he was my biological son more than Jason. Yeah. Like, I used to get that all the time. People would be like, oh, this is your biological son. I'd be like, no, no, no, this one.
Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, there was no difference when we were out at— you know what I'm saying? But I need him to take that step.
Yeah.
And the minute he's ready to take that step, just like we did for Jason, I'm going to pay for it. It's going to be ready. Hello. Yeah. It's going to be the best. We're going to be on it.
I'll be like, come on back, brand new money. Yeah, I think Christian knows that. And I'm going to tell you this, whether— you are there, whatever, you and I are one. We are one. So when we're talking, you know, it's a gentle reminder to him.
Oh, I know you do.
You understand why Dad is— you understand what you did, right? You understand how serious this is. So I need you to take full responsibility, accountability for what you did so that we can understand moving forward, none of that. Like, we don't do that.
Well, you do a great job because even though you set really clear boundaries, you allow us to figure out still how to mend our relationship. And I think that's one of the things you do great as a mom. Is that you make sure that everybody understands that there's ways. And let me tell you, let me not sit up here and just make it seem like me and Stephanie are the best parents in the world. You know, Jason gonna come on here tomorrow and he gonna tell y'all exactly how you feel about us. Okay? We are good. We're still, you know, we still figure things out. Okay? But I say that to say, even with that, you always are willing to say, and this is me too, we're always willing to say, I gotta be better for them. Yeah. And that's always, I think, what's best. So I think how we're navigating a child who is doing things or making choices that is hard. You know, in 20 years, we might look back at this and say, girl, we messed that up. Girl, but right now— You never know. But right now, we're trying to make the best decision. And all I know is that I love him. You love him. He is surrounded by love.
He is.
But he has to make a step for himself so that we can then step in.
Yeah.
So I want to ask you all, do you have a child that's struggling that could be potentially hurting themselves or someone in the family? And how do you deal with that? You know, we're figuring it out ourselves as we're in the thick of it right now. So talk to us about how you feel about it.
Hey Dad, it's Milo. I'm very sorry for what I did, and I felt like it just made things distance between us. You didn't kick me out, you didn't tell me I have to leave, which is true. Just felt like I've always had to have this alter ego of me doing everything by myself when I have the father that takes the time to help me, and I push you away. You're always trying to show me go this path, it's easier this way, but I was always choosing the rougher path in life. And I understand now that you were trying to help me, to show me you don't have to go through a rough lifestyle like I had. I do apologize, and I know it's been a few years because it takes time, because especially when a loved one is coming at you and saying things and just acting a certain type of way when it was never had to go down that direction. So I understand that, and I'm genuinely sorry.
