Mom, Choose Between Me Or Your Wife! | KARAMO

Nice to meet you. No, no worries. So please tell me what started the fight between you two a couple of weeks ago?

Okay, so I was working an overnight shift. I do security.

Okay.

So I was coming in the house and my mom just said something about me putting gas in the car and I was like, you know I don't have the money right now. I'm gonna put it in there.

Okay.

So she just got like a fighting match and I had hair. I cut my hair off. She pulled my hair and we just like, I tried to get her off of me. I'm not finna let you hit me. Like I'm grown now. You can't just, Like I'm not a child, so.

So she just pulled out the blue and just started pulling your hair because you didn't put your headphones on?

We was yelling at each other, we was yelling and we was arguing, but it's like she was just doing too much per usual.

Tell me about your childhood.

My grandma really raised me. My mom was there but not really there.

What did your mom expose you to when you moved in with her at 12?

Just a lot of different people. Like just when we moved into our apartment, it was just like, She was partying every day. It was people over there playing cards, yelling, then it'll turn to a fight 'cause it's so serious. It's just too much all the time.

And my producer told me that when your grandmother passed, which I'm very sorry about, your relationship changed with your mom.

Yeah, it's like we became distant. It may have to be the mom, but I feel like she didn't do that at all.

Got it, got it. And so you were craving her to be more serious?

Yeah, of course.

Okay.

I just want my mom to be serious. I want my mom to be my mom. Family, not my friend.

Okay. Are you scared to talk with your mom about this type of stuff?

I would say yeah, because anytime I try to talk to her, it's always, I'm right, you're wrong. Mom told me yesterday, like, she threw her life away for me. Like, she told me. So it's like, that hurt when you say that. When you say those type of things, like, how do you think that makes me feel? Like, I threw my life away for you.

How did your mom react when you let her into your life about your sexuality?

It wasn't hard to know, you know? So when she kept asking me about it, I kept saying no because like I just didn't wanna, I wasn't comfortable saying it yet. I wasn't comfortable being, you know, open about things like that.

But you get the choice to.

You let her know when you want. So when I finally came out, it was just like she gave me a little hell about it. Like she was like, that's not right. But I'm like, You're gay. And then she would say, well, I started messing with men so you wouldn't be gay. Like, so how are you like—

So when she was younger, she identified as a lesbian?

Yes.

And then she stopped because she felt like that was gonna influence you?

Yeah.

Okay. And then is she now in a relationship with a man?

No, she's married to a woman.

Got it. Okay. Tell me how it was when she got married.

In the week she got married.

She got married in a week?

Yeah, a week. Well, I would say a week and a half.

So she met her partner and they got married within a week?

Yeah.

She met her partner. She said it was just a once, a one-night thing.

A week later.

No, it's been 2 years.

2 years.

And they're still together. So it's a lot.

Do you like Kenya? Do you think your mom deserves better?

I think mom deserves better. I'm not too fond of Kenya, no.

My producer said that you think that she has toxic traits that she displays. Oh yes, they're right here. That right here.

This is good.

I love a receipt.

So I love a good receipt too.

Yes.

So my toxic traits is I feel like King is a user.

Okay.

I feel like she's alcoholic, manipulative, a narcissist, and verbally abusive.

Wow.

Yes.

Okay. And I don't know if she wants to hang this on the wall, but it's right here.

So what do you wanna tell your mom today?

I wanna tell my mom, do better, be better. Like you can have so much potential. My mom is like the best in the world. She can be.

Yeah.

She just doesn't do it.

My producers are telling me that you want an ultimatum, that either your mom today has to choose you and build a relationship with you or choose Kenya. And if she choose Kenya, you're walking away.

Yeah, I'm gonna get my own place and do my own thing. Definitely.

Wow, okay then, listen.

Which I think that they want.

Oh, okay. Let's hear what Tyler has to say about this. Everyone please welcome Tyler to the show.

Malcolm, your ass is grown. You 21, you a big-ass baby. Your grandma did that to you. And yes, I gave her my whole life. How did you give her your life? I was 17 when I had you.

That's your fault.

I was 17 when I had you.

I didn't ask to have you. Okay, then that's your fault. But I did what I had to do to make sure you was good. You ain't never lacked nothing. You ain't never lacked nothing in your whole life. Just 'cause you gave me everything, that doesn't mean— You didn't give me your life. I gave you my life. I didn't give you my life. Everything. I gave you everything. You ain't lack nothing.

Clearly you ain't missed a meal.

You everything. Everything.

Okay. Can you sit down?

I can.

So do you get into fights like this often?

All the time.

All the time. And what do the fights usually come from?

His mouth.

His mouth.

He needs to mind his business.

How could I mind my business when your business is in front of me?

Because you're in my house.

Okay, but I'm in your house. So if I wasn't there—

Most 21-year-olds be in college. Most 21-year-olds be in college.

You can tell me I don't have to leave.

Most 21-year-olds go to college.

All right, what happened during the last fight you two had?

He tried to kill me. Like I got, no, no, like not like kill, kill, but I have bad knees, right? And what he does is he punches at my niece.

He punches at your niece?

If she has my hair and I need to get you off of me and you're my mom and I can't, I'm not gonna physically like do my mom. So I hit her weak spot to get her off of me. So what you mean? What you want me to do?

Do you think he respects you?

He don't respect nothing. He don't respect himself.

Why you say he doesn't respect himself?

Because he doesn't focus on what needs to be done. Malcolm ain't no bad person. I had him at 17. My mom kind of like stepped in and kind of like, you know, did her big one with him. I'm not gonna even lie. She did her thing with raising him, but she spoiled him. He's selfish. He's selfish. The only person you think about is yourself.

Mom, no, if I didn't think, if I thought about myself, I wouldn't care about you.

Lower your tone.

Okay. Lower your tone.

He can hear you.

I said, if I only cared about myself, we wouldn't be here. I care about you. I care about a lot about you.

You made this, this is about you. This ain't got nothing to do with me.

Okay.

This about you. 'Cause if you cared about me, you wouldn't make me choose between you and my wife. If you cared about me, we wouldn't be here.

Does he get along with your wife?

No, he don't, no.

Why do you think? How's that?

Because they just alike. They don't care about nobody but themselves.

You feel like you're forced to be in the middle?

I am in the middle.

How's that affect you?

I didn't wanna hurt neither one of them, so I hurt myself by sticking around. I don't wanna hurt him. Like I said, I gave him my life.

What do you mean by that you gave him your life? I need to understand clearly what that means.

I stopped doing everything for me until he was 18. And then when he turned 18, he gonna ask me, "Oh, so you not my, are you tired of being my mom? Just let me know if you're tired of being my mom." Yeah, I'm tired. I've been doing this my whole life.

So how do you think that, are you tired of being my mom? That stuff like that, that hurt. You can't say that and I already feel a type of way. Like, you can't say you tired of being my mom and I already hurt.

Why did you ask?

What do you mean?

You asked me was I tired of being your mom. I'mma always be your parent until the day I have no life left in my body. But you have to understand, 17 years old, I didn't know what I was doing.

I didn't have a clue.

Ain't no handbook for this. If I would have had you at 30, I probably still wouldn't have knew what I was doing, but from 17 to you turn 18, and now I get to live a little bit, and you ain't—

You got a problem with that? You can't say—

You cannot sit here and say to Mr. Karamo that I was a bad mother. She's not living like a bad mother.

You making me live like I'm a bad mother, and I was never a bad mother.

I never said that you're a bad— You said that you're a bad mother.

No, you did.

You make me look like a bad mother.

No one said that you're a bad mom. I've never said that you're a bad mom. Malcolm, I'm trying to tell you, boy.

I'm telling you.

'Cause I'm stating the truth.

But you ain't gotta do it so loud.

You yelling, so what's the problem? I'm the mama.

Okay.

Oh my God. What do you think about the list that he made about your wife? He said—

Was I lying?

He said that he thinks your wife is a user and alcoholic, manipulative narcissist, verbally abusive.

And these have come from her.

Do you believe that?

Yes.

Do you think she's using you? Okay, well that silence says me a life. Your wife Kenya is in the audience today. Kenya, can you please stand? Kenya, how do you feel about hearing this?

Nowhere near.

Nowhere near.

So just like I said, of course they're not true.

Like I say, none of this is true. 'Cause it's from both ends. Everybody can be a narcissist in their own way. Everything starts from home. So with that being said, the stuff I've been around since I came around, it's been none but them doing this. So when I do speak up on something, I'm too blunt.

From your opinion, what's your relationship with Malcolm?

Do you like him?

Yeah, I never said I had a problem, but when I came and started speaking up on things that I felt that was wrong in the household.

Your wife is saying you don't like him.

I didn't never say I didn't.

Do you want Malcolm to move out of y'all's house?

I never spoke on that. We had a conversation.

That's not what you said, King. So what'd I say? Don't do that.

This is the reason why I'm in my own apartment now. Because you clearly told me that he don't want me there. You told me that. You told me that. Now, on my grandmother, you told me that. On my dead and deceased grandmother, you told me that.

You said he needs to move out, bro.

You said that to him. Yeah, I did. I said if he don't want nobody, say something about the simplest things. He needs to get his own.

This is not fake assistance.

Grown people stand on their own two feet.

I'm the only adult up here 'cause I'm the only one that both of y'all sat on. Girl, what you mean? Both of y'all don't need me. I don't need you, honey. Then go, boo. I'm not stopping you from leaving. I don't need you. I'm not stopping you from leaving. I don't need you, honey. I'm not stopping you from leaving. Don't do that. Don't do that. I'm not stopping you from leaving. Because when somebody speak on something simple, simple as that. I'm not stopping you from leaving. You speak on my mama, I'mma speak on your son. I'm so sorry. Check it off.

Check it off.

What you mean? No way, Neil. You don't need me. That baby Neil here.

Check it off.

Check it off.

The list is checked, baby. So hey. In the house, this will turn into something else. And I will have to step into the middle because I don't let my mama down. She don't play.

So chill. People got to realize how she talks and come off too.

It ain't just me.

I'm tired. What do y'all want me to do? What's your mood? Y'all want me to sit here— You can't be tired as a mother.

I'm so happy.

Well, what about as a wife? You can't be tired as a mother. What about tired as a wife? Okay, that's fine to say so. Okay. Everybody get tired. I'm tired. I'm tired of taking care of everybody and nobody takes care of me. Both of y'all get on my nerves. I get tired. As you said. I'm the one that gotta go to work. I got arthritis in both my knees and I work at Amazon delivering packages 'cause you won't get up and take a job anywhere. How I won't? Knock it off, bro. First off, I won't take a job anywhere. Stop talking to me, bro. I lost my job. 3 days. What's it do? 3 days, girl. Let me give y'all 3 days. A whole week. I just started the job first time when I left my job. I did everything to save your job, girl, because of Michael. I did everything to save your job. And what you do?

Thank you, Kenya. So the interesting part is that you came on here to give your mother an ultimatum about choosing her or choosing your wife.

Yeah.

You didn't need to give an ultimatum because I'm an outsider that's watching this. You two aren't in a healthy relationship. You don't wanna be in it. You just told me you moving out and you don't wanna be in it. And I think for you, when you were saying no one takes care of me, the first step you can do is take care of yourself by ending that type of relationship.

Exactly, first.

You had to find the strength in yourself to end that relationship even though I think you two have similar mouths. There is part of this where you are a little spoiled and you are a little disrespectful to your mother. And at the end of the day, I do believe a lot of the things that you say to him come from the way your relationship was established before. Like when you say, I gave you my life, you owe me, you go tit for tat for him, which is not the healthiest response from a mother. And I wanna just encourage you to understand that you could talk to him differently. But I understand that there is a bit of spoiledness. You would agree with me when you say I'm a bit spoiled. Yeah. I do understand now why she says things like, I gave my life. It's not a healthy thing to say, but I understand because you're saying, I pick up, I do for you, I'm giving for you, I'm doing everything. And you're taking advantage of the fact that you know she's gonna do that. So she is right in the fact that you do take advantage of her. And you are right in the fact that she's in an unhealthy relationship. But the fact that you are both right means that you both need to start doing the work. You need to start doing the work to figure out how to end and fix your own personal life. Because at some degree, when I heard y'all talking about, well, what do you have a man? Do you got— and y'all were going back and forth, that tit for tat y'all do. He's inadvertently picking up things from you. You need to be able to handle your situation, but also you need to, adult up, not even man up, you need to adult up. You are 21, you should be able to move out this house. There is a piece of you owe your mother an apology for taking advantage of her.

And I'm sorry, Mom. You say you don't, you think I don't love you, but I love you like damn. I do apologize and I'm gonna do, I'm gonna work on it, I promise. Work on what? I'm gonna work on not taking advantage of you and being respectful and watching what I say.

There you go.

I apologize, Malcolm. I will do better in how I'm talking to you.

Thank you.

I love you.

Thank you. I love you too. Thank you.

Girl, come here.

And one last thing before we go. One last thing before we go. You stay outta their relationship.

Please.

Yes. You need to, this is your first task outside of being responsible and growing up and doing your thing. They're toxic. I've seen it. We all seen it. But you don't need to be involved in that. Your mother has to make her own choices. This is still her partner that she chose, whether you like it or not, and you have to give that woman respect until they end it. Okay.

Okay?

Good luck to y'all, all right? Want more unlocked phones, DNA reveals, and family drama? Then make sure you're subscribed to the Karamo Show YouTube.