A 27-year-old confronts his mother about controlling him and dismissing his dreams in favor of her vision of him as a business mogul. Their conflict centers on his marijuana use, which she sees as evidence of deeper drug involvement, and unresolved grief over their sister Ashley's death that has fractured the family.
Chapters
She wants it this way. She wants me to be a magician. She wants me to be this business mogul.
Are those not your dreams?
They're not my dreams per se, no. I don't even know what my dreams are because I haven't had the chance to get my own dreams because she's always—
Pause, pause, pause.
Hold on, you've always— Always.
Let me talk about your dream.
Is this gonna be a negative attack against me? 'Cause I'm just wondering if that's where we're going with this. 'Cause please, I'm gonna ask you to choose your words wisely because number one, my way or the highway. Isn't the truth.
It is though. It's either your way or the highway. It's either if I don't do what you want me to do for me. If I don't do what you want me to do, what you want me to do, then it's a whole problem. It's like you have this person, you have this Nick up here and it doesn't matter if I can never reach that person or if I don't do what you want me to do to be that Nick, then I'll never be good enough. I'll never reach that.
Was your relationship like this before your sister passed?
We've always butted heads, but since my sister's passed, it's just kind of like, We haven't really talked or discussed anything. We really don't.
Do you think it was fair that you just picked up and left and I had to scramble?
The only reason I was in LA was 'cause you brought me out there and Ashley was there.
Once there was no reason for me to be there with Ashley, then it was just like, what was the point of staying there? What was the point?
Listen, you had the ice cream. He was doing standup. He does the magic. You were supposed to do parties. Remember the business parties?
What if I don't wanna go out and do parties? What if I just wanna be with my friends at a bar and say, hey, you wanna see something cool?
You told my producers that you feel like you're the black sheep of the family. What do you mean by that?
My other siblings, they couldn't do no wrong. No matter what they did, Ashley had her friends, so quote unquote friends, but if I had a friend that we would wanna go out and like go to the movies or when they have a party at my house, we would all go out and chill.
Anybody who has friends that do drugs or alcohol, they're to me not good friends for you. And you guys are not gonna do drugs in my house.
Do you feel like your mom controls you?
I do, yes.
Why?
I'm a 27-year-old man. She wants me to be this community, this much this.
Non-drug using individual.
Okay, she wants me to be this non-drug using, So if I don't ever, if I don't stop drinking or drugs, then I'm not good enough.
Do you engage in using drugs or alcohol?
Yes.
Both?
No, just marijuana.
Nothing else?
No.
Any history in the past?
No.
So why is your mom thinking that you're actually hanging out with people who are doing drugs?
He got in trouble with doing, with someone smoking weed in the car.
Literally, Ashley has passed away, died. She's dead right now. When's the last time I can go smoke a joint? If I can sit home after a long day, most people can drink a beer. I'm not going out and partying. I'm smoking my joint.
