Mom, My Dog Is Dead Because Of You! | KARAMO

The last time this mother and daughter saw each other, this happened.

Don't call my phone, don't text me, I don't need none of y'all. And I am leaving. I'm dead to you. You got me down.

I don't care.

I don't care. And anybody who ask, I'm going to wipe you off my media. Anybody who ask me, I'm done.

Listen, they haven't seen each other since and they are here today to see if this relationship can be saved. Everyone please welcome Sharika to the show so we can hear her side of the story first. Sharika, nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you as well.

So what caused that outburst?

Well, we were having a discussion about my son going to college and she chimed in, Sade made a comment and then that started started an uproar. Because most of the time when she does make her statements or her comments, she's trying to push her opinion onto you. And my kids don't like that.

Got it.

And at this point, it's been going on so long, I'm kind of detached. I've been trying for years and nothing has changed.

So what happened when she drove back home?

She got upset, as you see in the video. She said she was leaving. She lives in Maryland, so that's like a 14, 16-hour drive. Me and my other daughter was supposed to drive back with her, but after this happened, she left on her own, her and her two dogs. That video I had sent to another family member and they called her and they were like, you know, I saw the video. I'm very disappointed in you. So she got upset. She pulled off of the road, went to a rest stop. She was frazzled. She has anxiety and her dogs got out of the car. And one of 'em did get hit by a car and she had to put the dog down.

Mm, mm. Is she blaming you all for that?

When she first called, she did blame me. She said because I had sent the video to the family member that I was trying to hurt her. And that because I did that, that's why the dog, you know, got out.

Yeah.

And got hit.

But does she feel that way still to this day? Or has she apologized for that?

She apologized. She did retract, you know, saying that it was my fault. But deep down, I think that she blames me.

Mm. So what do you want to happen today?

I want to understand why she feels like I haven't been a good mother. I want to understand why she feels like I don't love her, that I have not protected her. And I just wanna understand that because I love her. She's my firstborn.

Yeah, okay. Well, I think it's time to hear your daughter's side of the story. So everyone, let's welcome Sade to the show. Hello, Sade. Thank you for being here.

Can I give you a hug?

Yes, you can. How you doing? How you doing? Thank you for being here.

Hi, mother.

Hi. Can I have a hug?

Mm, maybe later.

Mm, you don't wanna give your mother a hug?

No.

Why?

'Cause I feel like I haven't even got my dog's ashes back. Like this happened a week ago, like maybe less, almost less than a week ago.

Oh, this, so that what we saw in that video was, this is all recent?

Yeah, it is recent.

Oh wow.

I wrote the show, I wrote the show even before that happened.

Got it.

And so just to try to see if we could get help.

What problems do you think I can help you solve?

I think that it's a communication issue, like above everything. I just think that My perception of my childhood differs from my siblings so much that it's hard for my mom to accept that I just feel different from them. I wasn't the easiest child, but that still doesn't diminish how it made me feel.

Yeah.

But it's bad that I wasn't a good mother. You didn't have a good childhood.

I didn't. I got bullied by my siblings. And what I'm not gonna do— So let me ask you this. Yes, Karamo.

Can I ask you this? Why do you feel like your family hates you?

Because I got into physical altercations with my mom. I've said very despicable things to my mom and I'm willing to take full responsibility for that video and for my actions.

Hold on, it looks like we're getting a ping. Our producer told me we have a voicemail from your sister Shayla. Let's see what she has to say.

Oh my God. Shawnee, I would like you to take accountability for the relationship that you've ruined with your younger siblings. The way you ridicule and belittle us has ruined our relationship. The things that you said to me on my birthday when you were upset have done irreversible damage. You told me on my 21st birthday and that I was dead to you. You also said that I was nothing but a liability to this family, and I would like you to respect that. I decided to cut ties because of that, and I want you to accept the part that you played in it as well. As for the allegations towards Mom and her parenting, we all lived in the same house together, all 5 of us, and only one of us is saying that we had a bad childhood. And at the end of this process, I hope that Mr. Karamo is able to go ahead and give you the help that you need to mend the relationships that you've ruined.

Shaday, what's your response to that?

I called her after the dog and she said, I can't talk to you right now. Because she was upset about the dog.

And then she didn't even have the courage to come here today to work on it.

Mom, how do you feel about what your other daughter had to say?

She's being totally honest.

Mm-hmm. Mom, I'll tell you this, you're not a bad mother. I'll be very clear, I asked you earlier.

And I wanna make it clear, I did not call her a bad mother. I may say things out of anger, but this woman has done so much for her kids.

I know, I already know, I know, I know she has.

And I hate that she thinks that I think she's a bad mother because I do not think that.

So did you hear that? Did you hear that? She doesn't think you're a bad mother. And neither do I. The way you talked about your daughter is not in a way of a bad mother. It's not in the way of somebody who hates her child. It's a way of a mother who's, my intention is to only figure out how to make this better. And part of that, you have to now realize that the way you're communicating is not helping your case any. Because now this is for you. If you really want them to understand your pain and what you're going through, you gotta communicate a little differently. Listen, Mom, I want you to know one thing. Your daughter has her own experiences, and though it's not your account, does not mean that you cannot take accountability for her, what she's saying she needs. So for instance, in that video, I'm gonna use that just as a prime example. When they're fighting, you need to not walk away. And if you are gonna walk away, pull her with you.

I hear you.

Mom, I wanna know, are you willing to work on your relationship with your daughter by giving her that support and that security, letting her know I'm on your side.

I am. I got you, Sade. You know that. I love you. You mean everything to me.

So if you want your mother, she says that I'm committed to be there for you. So now this is about where your communication has to get better, where you have to say, okay, mom, if you wanna be here, this is what I need. That gives her an opportunity to step up and show you she's gonna be there for you. Now if she doesn't, then you have full right to then blow up because you like, look, I showed you.

No, I don't. I gotta walk away. I gotta learn how to walk away.

Boom. That's what I was gonna hope you was gonna say. That's what I would hope. Oh, well you done got to step 2. I'm still giving you the pass. But if you can get to step 2 like that quick, then yes, what you'd have to do is walk away. And you gotta remember the last most important thing, her kids are not your kids. And that's why you frustrated that she keeps calling them kids because you're like, these are the grown people. They are her babies and she gets to call 'em her babies, but they're not your babies. They're not your babies and they not your kids. So you don't have to be concerned about nothing with them, okay?

I'll try.

Yeah? I see you smiling. How you feel? A little better? Yeah. How you feel, mom? A little better?

A little better.

Give me all that hug. Yeah, it's all right.

You look so pretty.

You too.

I love you.