In this episode of KARAMO, host Karamo sits down with LaShawn, a 46‑year‑old former professional model and longtime basketball coach, and her 22‑year‑old daughter Julissa. LaShawn created a lingerie‑themed basketball league called “Buns and Basketball,” which combines thongs and jerseys to give women a platform for confidence, fitness, and financial gain. She recruited Julissa from the start, initially because Julissa was financially strained and the league could provide income. Over three years, Julissa participated but grew increasingly uncomfortable with the sexualized exposure, public judgment, and feeling that her mother was using her as a profit‑making tool. Julissa eventually quit the league to pursue a music career, accusing her mother of control, exploitation, and prioritizing money over genuine maternal love. LaShawn expresses hurt, describing the situation as a “dagger in the heart,” but also frames her actions as acts of love and empowerment. Karamo mediates, highlighting the communication gap: LaShawn’s love language is providing material support, while Julissa’s love language is emotional validation and autonomy. The conversation moves toward mutual apologies—LaShawn apologizes for not hearing Julissa’s needs, and Julissa acknowledges her mother’s efforts—culminating in a tentative reconciliation and a reminder to the audience to subscribe.
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As they say, sex sells. But today, all that sexiness and all those dollars is what's driving a wedge between a relationship. My next guest, Lashawn, says that the buns and basketball is what brought her and her daughter, Julissa, together. But now, buns and basketball is what's tearing this mother and daughter apart. I know y'all like, what is buns and basketball? Trust me, y'all about to find out. All right, listen, Lashawn, please come on out. And talk to me real quick.
Hey.
Wish I could have a hug. How are you doing? You look amazing.
Thank you.
Woo. Usually I never ask someone their age, but I think in this moment, would you mind if I ask you your age?
That's fine.
How old are you?
I am 46.
46. Gorgeous.
Thank you.
Okay, so LaShawn, tell me about this betrayal before we get into the sort of the buns and basketball.
The betrayal about my daughter Jalisha, it was just a dagger in my heart that she started this with me and I feel like she should finish it because we always had a great relationship.
Yeah, so she started Buns and Basketball with you?
Yes.
Yeah, tell us a little bit about what that is.
Buns and Basketball is a lingerie basketball league. Yeah. Which, which consider we wear thongs and we wear a jersey shirt.
Okay, a thong and a jersey. Listen, I'm all about it, girl. Empower yourself, okay? Hold on, okay. So I just wanna know, how did you come up with this idea?
How I came up with it, actually, I am a professional model, sexy model. And also I was a basketball coach for 13 years, made high school varsity in 8th grade. So I always loved the game. So I just combined that as my platform to create sexiness and a sport together.
Yes, listen, I love the create your own lane, okay? 'Cause I've never seen that. So how do you convince other people to play basketball on the phone?
A lot of women come to me and they're like, yo, I really had a low self-esteem and I feel like this right here would build my confidence up. And actually I built a lot of lady, I inspired a lot of women just show what they have, their curves or no curves. So all sides matter.
Yeah. Yeah. I think there's something beautiful. Yeah, give it up. I think there's something very beautiful about the fact that through a game, you are empowering women. And I think that's the most important thing at the end of the day because some people will look at this and judge. But if these women are actually getting a workout, they are actually feeling empowered. I think that's the most important thing for me to say, great, if it makes you feel sexy, if it makes you feel good, I support it 100%. Now when it came to your daughter, she said you got her to convince her to play on the team and to join this with you. How did that come about?
Actually, she was broke.
Okay.
Okay, she was literally broke, needed money, and this was a platform for her to actually make money. Anyone that's a part of this platform has grown.
Got it.
You know, you got other opportunities that people might say, "Hey, you gotta look for this or whatever." How long have you wanted her to actually play in the league? Actually, this league's been going on for like 3 years now.
So you wanted her to play from the beginning?
Yeah, she's been with me from day one. At first, she didn't wanna play. And then when she saw that, hey, this is a moneymaker situation, she took it.
Got it. And so what was her hesitation at the beginning? 'Cause you said she didn't wanna play originally.
'Cause I guess she didn't want her buns hanging out.
Oh, got it.
Yeah, I would say that.
Yeah, okay. So what happened in the end where she decided and said, I can't do this no more?
She got with this guy, my coworker, and I just feel like he pushed her away from our mother and daughter love.
Were the two of you really close before? Yes. Yeah.
Yes.
Describe your relationship.
I taught her everything. I was her basketball coach, her mentor, her everything. If you see us together, we look like sisters.
How do you feel that your daughter quit the team?
It felt like a dagger in my heart, man.
Yes.
I really worked hard for this.
Yeah.
To build a platform for her. 'Cause when a mother and daughter has a bond like no other, that's how our relationship was basically.
Yeah, you were tight.
Real, real tight. It was just very disappointing. You know, I never quit on her. She just quit on me.
Those are specific words. You never quit on her, but you felt like she quit on you. So let's go ahead and bring her out. And see if there's a bigger issue. So come on out, Jalicia. Nice to meet you. Hi. So I know that my producers told me you were backstage crying. What was going on? 'Cause I can see you're still emotional now.
She got me playing in the Buns of Basketball. That took forever for me to just say yes. 'Cause that's not me. I'm not into all that, you know, social media, entertainment, showing my body off, all that. And also, when I started, I wasn't broke. I had a good job, had my own house, own car.
So you mean to tell me you didn't have, you had a job when we moved in together?
Yes. No, I'm talking about before. But you said, When I started Buns of Basketball, I was broke, right?
Right.
Didn't I just get a, what? Have my own money, own car, nice, everything, taking care of myself. And I did that for you because you always want me to follow your lead, do whatever you do. And that's not me. You never ask me how I feel. What I want to do.
So what do you want to do?
I just want to do music, have a normal life, not worry about what other people got to say about me or you.
How long did you play with Bunsen basketball?
Like a year and a half, probably almost, yeah, about 2.
And was it a happy time for you?
At the time, yes. I met wonderful people, but at the same time, when it come to game time, I'm like—
Did you like playing basketball?
Yeah, I like playing basketball.
Okay, so you did like playing?
Yes, I did. That was the only reason why I continued to play.
Did you like being with your mom around that time?
Yeah.
Okay. You've been receiving a lot of judgment about the Buns and Basketball League 'cause you said you don't wanna worry about what other people have to say. Tell me about, well, like the comments you get.
It's more so like, oh, you a porn star now, you a stripper. And that's the whole reason why I got off of social media now because people think they know me. And I don't. And I want her to really know me.
Do you feel like your mom controls you?
Yes, very much so.
In what ways?
I'm gonna say this, it's to the point to where now, you know, we ain't talking, you know, it's just been a wedge between us to where she has no control over me now. Every time she asks me to do something regarding entertainment, I do it. But again, I never wanna do that. It's like you pimping me out, using me.
How does it make you feel hearing your daughter say those things?
A lot of things that people do in this world, it is for entertainment, but people judge 'em a certain kind of way. I mean, maybe it might sound like I probably Not totally that word pimping, but I just felt like it was a platform that it's a way to, I understand, but if something happened to me, this is let down to you. So you don't have to play, you can just control it if something happened to me.
I'm here to do this. I'm glad you used that word control because I know that you, in your mind, you're saying you're setting up something for her future. And I do believe that a foundation is important for you. But your daughter is saying that as you're building the foundation, she feels controlled. She feels as if you're not hearing her. And that's what I wanna know. 'Cause I'm not taking away from you building the foundation. I know you're doing the best what you can. But talk to her about that. She says she feels controlled by you. If you don't—
I apologize if you feel like that. But like I say, it's all nothing but love, baby. People get judged all the time if you do good or bad.
But that's not the love I want.
Well.
What type of love do you want?
Yeah.
I just want her to be a mother. She don't know how to do that.
Wow.
Everything is money to her.
Wow.
So with your music career, who started your music career and made sure that you could get into a platform? Who helped you start all this? And that's fine. Who got you out there? And that's fine. But who got you out there?
That's fine.
Did I get you out there, yes or no?
Yes, but I'm out there because of a name that you made for yourself. Not, oh, Jelisha said I'm—
So people don't know you?
They know me by, oh, your mom still does this, that, and that. Oh, it ain't nothing really good that you really saying, 'cause this how you know me.
So all these, now buns and basketball only been 3 years. So how was our mother before this? How did I treat you? How did I treat you? You weren't. How, Lily?
It's money to you. Everything is about money. The day I turned—
Have you ever been without? You always drove all the fancy cars and everything. You 15 years old and own a whole Mercedes-Benz. Who has that, right?
But again, BMW, material stuff that I didn't—
I don't want.
There's been a lot of things that I've heard from both and the beauty of me being an outside perspective is that I can hear your point of view and I can hear your point of view. You grew up in a situation where you didn't have and you just wanted somebody to be there for you, to give you a foundation, to support you. And so as you grew up, that is how you felt would be the best thing to do for your daughter. Acts of service and gifts. I'm gonna do for you, I'm gonna do for you. Like that's you showing your love. And you received it and you got all that stuff and you benefit from it. And that's the truth of the matter. Even hearing your mother say she gave her master bedroom up so that you and your man could sleep in it. We know at the end of the day that she's not a bad mother, but I also understand your perspective. You're saying, Mom, you're giving me, giving me, giving me because that's what you thought was the foundation I needed, but that's not the foundation I needed. You're giving her the foundation you needed, but she's telling you that she needs a different foundation. She's telling you that, that I needed you just to talk to me, to hear me, to understand that even though you gave me these things that I do believe you appreciated.
Absolutely.
That you actually wanted her to just say, what do you want? How am I affecting your life? And this doesn't make you a bad mom because you were working your butt off to literally working your butt off to try to give her a life that you didn't have. You know what I mean? I'm not trying to be funny, but like, but at this, the rate of the matter is that she was saying, "I don't need that. I just want you to talk to me." I will say this to you is I want you to at least be able to leave here and letting your mom know that you can acknowledge that she did love you and that she did try her best. And if you don't feel that way, I don't want you to say it. But do you feel that your mom tried her best with you?
Yeah.
Can you at least say that to your mother?
Mm-hmm, I know you tried.
You really did. I wouldn't be here without you, of course.
That's a step because I needed you to hear that as a mother to know you weren't a bad mom. But now what I need you to do is to acknowledge, yes, I was giving you things, but I wasn't hearing you when you said you needed something else, and I'm sorry. Can you tell your daughter that you're sorry for not hearing what she actually needed?
I'm sorry for not hearing what you actually needed and what you wanted. I've done my best, and I'm sorry I was fooled that I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't make you do anything that you, didn't wanna do.
There's a part of that that's not fully true. And the reason being is because as your daughter, I'm sure there was an unconscious pressure that you felt to have to make sure mom feels like I'm there for her. Yeah. You actually used language at the beginning of this, which is she quit on me. And that makes a child feel like if I quit on mom, if I speak up about what I need, she's gonna reject me. Yeah. That's where those abandonment issues come from. Am I hitting it on the nail?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And so can you apologize and say, "I actually now realize that I didn't mean to force you to do things you didn't wanna do and I won't ever do that again." I apologize.
If I felt like I forced you to do anything that you didn't wanna do, could you please forgive me? I love you. I would never quit on you. Just talk to me more and I'll be more understanding, okay? All right, love you.
Love you.
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