In a segment of the Karamo talk show, mother Nicole confronts her strained relationship with her daughter Quanay (also referred to as Kwane). Nicole repeatedly apologizes, expressing remorse for past actions and acknowledging that she repeated patterns of abuse she experienced from her own mother—a "generational curse." She emphasizes that forgiveness is essential for healing, citing prayer as a personal coping mechanism that helped her stop hating her mother. Quanay articulates her longing for a genuine, ongoing connection with her mother, wanting someone to call and confide in, but also admits she cannot yet forgive. The host, Speaker B, facilitates the dialogue, prompting both parties to articulate their needs, explore the possibility of rebuilding trust, and highlight the emotional barriers that remain. The exchange underscores themes of intergenerational trauma, the difficulty of granting forgiveness, the role of spirituality in recovery, and the desire for sustained communication beyond the televised setting.
Chapters
I don't understand why am I here because I don't feel like, you know, like this is not gonna get resolved.
Well, you haven't watched this show before.
Okay, I don't.
This is a place where my intention is always to heal. So I hear both sides and I'm hearing you. What is it that you need from your mom?
What I want from my mom is just my mom to understand after we leave the show, we can still, you know, we can talk about what's going on. Or I want her to know and understand what I've been through and just how can we work on moving past it? How can we work on being a mother and a daughter? Because I want to build a relationship with my mom. I want to have my mom back, but I don't know how to.
Nicole, you told my producers that you feel like Quanay's responsible for her choices. What do you feel?
No, what I do feel is I'm sorry. I can't make up for what happened. I can't. If I could go back and rearrange her whole family setup, I would. But I can't. The only thing I can do is I can be there for you now. I don't have a problem, Kwane, I love you. I don't know how to be a mom. I'm still learning, I don't know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't know, Kwane.
Can you hear your mom right now?
I don't know all these things. I'm learning as I go. I would learn from other women watching them with their kids too. I'm sorry.
Can you look at your mom?
I'm so sorry, Kwane. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I know that won't get, that won't take away the pain that you feel. I don't know what else to do but pray. I heard you say, "Oh, Miss Pray." Yes, because that's what worked me through. That's what helped me not hating my mom for so long. Some things is generational. It's just that thing is a generational curse. And it's true. Everything that my mother did to me, I did to her. So yes, it took me years to get myself together. Because I was still beating me up. I was so messed up. I'm not perfect. I was a horrible mother, horrible. There's no denying it.
So how do you, Nicole, see that this relationship can be repaired?
I'm willing to be open with Kwane. I'm not saying she, I am open. I understand completely.
I see your openness.
I get it, I understand. But you can't hold on, I'm not gonna say this, I can't tell her to not hold on But for me, I couldn't hold on to that. I'm still angry with my mother, but I had to forgive her because I needed to move on. I had to. So I understand.
What are you thinking about right now?
I feel like she really meant it this time, and I feel like, I don't know. It's just a lot of stuff going through my head right now. I understand. It really is. I don't know what else to say. I don't.
Nicole, you told my producers that Kwane needs to forgive. Please explain.
I think it's important to forgive because we have to forgive in order to heal. You have to. In order to move forward, you gotta forgive. You can't keep holding on. It'll cause you to be sick.
Yeah.
I can't do that. I just have a problem with that.
And that takes time.
Yeah. You want your mom? You want your mom?
I do, I do, I really do, I really do.
What does wanting your mom look like for you?
Just having somebody to call, somebody to talk to and just, it's a friend 'cause I don't have that at all. I don't have nobody.
Call your mother.
It's just me.
Hold up, hold up, where are you going? I know you wanna watch more Karamo, so click here to subscribe and click here to watch more so we can keep talking and growing, friends. I love you.
