My Baby Father Got Me Arrested After Giving Birth! | KARAMO

So your boyfriend Jay left you during your pregnancy?

Yes.

Tell me what was going on.

So we were going through some financial troubles and I felt like I was being the breadwinner and I ain't like that 'cause I just feel like a city girl. So I feel like I should be taken care of and I just didn't feel like I was being taken care of. So I did try to break up with him.

Okay.

And—

This is how in the beginning that you tried to break up with him?

Yeah.

This is like a month in, 2 months?

Yeah.

Okay.

When I first found out I was pregnant in the same week.

Got it.

So then I was like, oh, Well, you can come back, I guess, because I'm diabetic and I'm high risk and I already know how this gonna go. I'm not gonna be able to work. I'm gonna be, I have a daughter already with someone else. So I already knew that he needed to, you know, be there. But he didn't come back. So I'm like, okay, maybe it's his sister 'cause it's always his sister. And he told, no, it wasn't his sister. So then as time went on, it was like around the fair season, September, he had a girlfriend and it was the same girl that he was with before he got with me. So you already know what's in the back of my head and I'm 2 months pregnant. I feel like it's get back also because I just tried to break up with him and I didn't know I was pregnant. So he probably wanted to show his muscles. And then also I feel like it was because I'm pregnant and he wanna hurt me. So as time went on, I'm like, okay, I don't know what I wanna do as far as You know, my pretty side don't have anybody. I grew up in foster care, so I didn't really know what type of help I was gonna get 'cause I just went through this with my daughter and her father. So as time went on, I'm calling him about doctor's appointments. Like I said, I'm high risk, so I found out the gender early. I found out, you know, I had like this antibody M, all this other stuff where they were gonna need the father's genetics to make sure that my baby would be healthy. And when I called, I was blocked. So I called his sister. I called his sister and me and my friend was in my living room and I'll never forget this. You know when you're pregnant, sometimes you just remember like the smells, the taste, the sounds of everything. I can remember every detail. She said on that phone on speaker that the baby was not his. She knows that the baby's not his. He said that the baby is not his and I need to go figure out what I'm gonna do but stop calling her.

Just at least have a conversation because this is what you're calling about now. I get in the beginning you were calling about like you come back after we've already broke up, but now this is for the genetic health of your child. This is for the health of your baby. And even if it might not be his baby as so he was saying, like still you wouldn't wanna support a woman that you were just with just to make sure her baby is healthy. That's hard. I mean, I know there's two sides to every story, so I can't wait to hear his side, but it still doesn't explain why you were arrested just weeks after giving birth?

So during the pregnancy, I was hurt. I have bipolar depression disorder, PTSD, ADHD, and oppositional defiance disorder. So you know, that with a lot of trauma and the different types of trauma, I've been in therapy for 12 years. I wanted to hear him out 'cause 50/50, you supposed to, you know, work stuff out when you're in a relationship. But all that went out the window when I was pregnant and you taking this girl to the fair. You bought me turkey legs. You don't buy nobody else no turkey legs at no fair. So I did not like that. So I went, he called me out the blue. Mind you, that's a lot because I ain't heard from you 'cause I'm pregnant. I'm on the side of the road, I can't change a tire. Can you please help me? I have AAA, I will always have insurance. You know, I made sure he was straight, but my car note due is next week. I'm not working 'cause I'm high risk. You're gonna have to pay me my money back.

He didn't pay the money.

I didn't get my money back. So what happens when you don't pay your car note?

They repo your car.

Oh.

And so they repo your car.

I repoed his tires.

Oh.

So I, yeah. And I repoed them every single time I saw them tires.

Oh, I'm not tripping. Air only leak like that when somebody slash your tires, bro. Like, what the fuck?

I'm gonna keep doing it. Well, never mind. In my head, I was gonna keep doing it. So they eventually—

And so that's why after you gave birth.

Nope. So I kept slashing the tires. They gave me 50B while I was pregnant for the rest of the pregnancy.

Okay.

So they dropped the 50B because he said he didn't want nothing to do with me and the baby.

So, okay.

But how does he stop you from getting your baby? And also how do you end up in jail? I'm still confused in this part.

I'm almost there.

Okay, I'm almost there. I'm like.

He stopped me from getting the baby because I let him sign the birth certificate.

Okay.

So I called the police. I didn't know that at the time, but you know, I'm at the house like, get my baby back. We're arguing back and forth. I didn't mean to, but now I don't have no regrets. But I was trying to reverse my car, but we were arguing, so I wasn't paying attention and it was in drive. So I ran my car from his car into their house. And as that was happening, now the police was coming down the street. So they saw it with they own two eyes and plus—

Hold on, my producer told me this was actually caught on tape.

I wanna see what happened.

I'm going to jail. I'm not playing.

I am going to jail.

I am.

I swear to God.

If you do it again, the first time you went, you reversed and went back.

I don't have no regrets.

It's about my kids. What do you mean?

Are you gonna hit my car?

And I did. I already called the police. They made me mad. They got that reaction out of me, 'cause I didn't mean to the first time. He's like, oh, you gonna hit my car? I was like, oh, I'm gonna show you a hit, 'cause the first one wasn't really a hit enough. It wasn't hit enough. So if I'm going to jail, my mama always say, if you gonna be a monkey, be a gorilla. So I chose to be a gorilla.

Girl, that was not good advice your mama gave you. Let me just let you know that right now, okay? That was not, okay? If you act like a monkey, you remember you're a human being that had kids. Who can monitor their emotions and calm themselves down.

I also just feel like—

You had the rage in you.

You had, yeah.

I got it.

And it's just, even right now, I'm irritated and I'm angry about it because it's about my baby.

But you was also destroying your own stuff, right?

It was already hit. It was already hit, not gonna lie. So it was also already hit multiple times.

I get it. They didn't give you back your baby, so you were upset. You're in a heightened state, you're postpartum, Listen, as much as I can joke about it, there is, I understand the mental state you could be in. I get that. Especially also telling me with the bipolar, the oppositional defiance disorder, I get these things. There are not excuses, but I can understand the mindset you could be in. Do you two still live together now? You still live together?

Yes, we are together.

Okay.

That was a lot.

It was.

It was a lot.

So why did you leave Naomi during her pregnancy?

Honestly, I don't feel like I left. I felt like I was forced away.

Okay.

Degraded, humiliated, all that. And once it hit the net, that was the straw, the final straw, honestly.

What was it, the final straw?

Hitting the net, our business hitting the net.

Oh yeah, okay. When you put it on the net.

Your sister put it out there.

No. Were you the one that called the police on Naomi? No. Who was the one that called the police?

She called the police on herself.

You called the police on yourself, okay then.

Because I wanted the baby back, remember?

Yeah, I remember. I just wanted clarification just to see if maybe he had called the police the police before you had called him? I heard you in the video saying, "I called him." I heard it as you were reversing.

He the police though.

To go back. What was the first time that this happened?

That was the first time ever hurt my car or anything, yeah. But it's happened multiple times.

Got it.

We have a video of this I wanna take a look at.

She done ran up on me and hit my fucking car, dog.

Oh my God.

Hold on. I asked you, girl, if you hit the car again. You said no. This a different car.

I hit it again? Oh yeah. I knew, that's why I always knew. That's why I made that little face. I did do that, I did do that.

She done ran up on me and hit my car down. Well, Jay, I think it's time to unlock your phone first. I know what's up with him. We went through text messages, DMs, GPS. You want to know if Jay was still communicating with his ex. That was one of your main concerns. And he says he is not. My unlock the phone investigators searched his texts and found that he is not telling the truth. There was one suspicious text message that we thought we'd find. It said, "What happened with you? Naomi messed that up. Oh my gosh. What you doing?" 'Cause this is with you and your friend expressing the fact that you was talking to your ex, right? Yeah. So Naomi, it's time to unlock your phone, right?

Tear it up.

All right. We went through your phone, your DMs, your GPS. Jay, you want to know if Naomi was still communicating with the man she had an affair with over the summer. Naomi said she was not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her phone and she is not telling the truth.

Yes, I am.

She has his contact saved under an alias. It's this sleeping emoji with the word trash. Oh, you thought we weren't gonna find her?

Oh.

Okay, yes.

I haven't been talking to him.

Well, yes you have, 'cause we found 126 deleted interactions between them as of recent, as of summer.

September.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So first, if you're not communicating with him, why switch his name in your phone to emoji and trash? And then secondly, why delete the messages and the interactions that you've been doing since September?

Okay, so because when it came out, it came out in September. When everything came out, it did come out in September. I miscarried in September. So when everything happened, it happened in September. So since September, I've been—

So this is the guy that you were not sure if either one of them could be the father?

Yeah, so it's been, It's been since then. Got it, okay. So yeah, that's true.

Well, Jay wants to know if Naomi was communicating with other men via social media. Naomi says she was not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her DMs and found she's not telling the truth. Found DMs between Naomi and another man starting in July through December. Can I see this?

Oh.

You know who we're talking about?

No.

You said we messy. I am. I'm actually, you know, I ain't the messing with, y'all the messing with. I'm just delivering information. Okay, so this is for you to look at. This is messages between her and a good gentleman by the name of Jacob. Oh, you know who Jacob is?

I heard of him.

Okay.

And you know the messages that we got there?

Yeah.

Okay, okay. Yeah. Okay, well listen, let's keep on going. What are your thoughts about the message you're looking at? You processing?

Processing.

I understand. All right, well Jay, you also want to know if Naomi was cheating when she should have been at her friend's house. She said she was not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her GPS and found that in this case she was telling the truth.

The woman you're with is telling you she doesn't wanna be with you. Do you wanna be with this man?

Not really.

Tell him.

I really don't.

Okay.

But we do have a great family dynamic and we just want to be able to have the kids and the children.

So what she's telling you right now is that she wants to co-parent with you, but she does not want to be with you.

And my question for you is then why can't that resonate with you?

Because I'm confused. 'Cause when I actually did leave her alone, and moved on, that was a problem then. She would pop up, threaten the girl, try to fight the girl, all this, but you don't wanna be with me. So what's the problem when I move on?

[Speaker] So I'm gonna ask you, why would that be okay behavior for you to wanna stay in?

[Speaker] What behavior?

[Speaker] The behavior of the woman you're with telling you she doesn't wanna be with you, but then acting jealous when she's around another girl. Why are you attracted to that behavior?

[Speaker] I'm not attracted to it.

[Speaker] Because what I'm just trying to do for you right now, brother, because this relationship is already over, we already know whatever. Since you crashed car one, we already knew it was over.

I'm gonna get to you working the self-work you gotta do, but I think you're fully aware of it.

We gotta get back to you right now because the thing for me is that everyone else is clear on what this relationship is and you are not. You are still in a space where you're hoping and wishing for what could be good instead of looking at what it is.

No, this is where I'm coming from.

I've told her this. You can defend this all you want.

No, no, no, I'm not trying to defend it, sir. I said this, I was like, The past that we've had, I've been trying to show you that no matter what, I'll be here for you, with you, 'cause I'm in love with you, yeah. But the mood swings and stuff, it gets old and stuff, and then feelings change, demeanors change, you don't talk, you start to put yourself in a shell. That's where the problems come. Yeah, other than that.

[Speaker] So unfortunately, the problems don't just come from there. The problems come from you not accepting that this is an unhealthy relationship. And you understanding as a young man that you should never be in a situation where you feel as if you have to be with someone who's going to make you feel wanted one day and not wanted the next. The first time someone hits your car, this first time someone tells you they don't want you, the first time someone says anything, it's your sign to say, "I'm worth more and I deserve more." [APPLAUSE] And this is a conversation and we consistently have with women. But I'm telling you as a young man, you deserve that as well. You deserve a family unit. You deserve what you want. I know earlier you said you don't really want that or whatever, but you actually do. You're attracted to a man who wants those family values. And part of your trigger and your trauma is that you were told and left alone. You were abandoned. You weren't given the love that you desire. And so you're finding it in him, but it's also with the wrong person.

Person.

And so it's then triggering you and the behaviors that are most negative in you because you have an internal battle in you. You're saying, look, I got the family unit that the little girl in me wanted, but the adult woman in me knows that this ain't the man I need to be doing this with.

Yes, and that's why I reached out, 'cause I know that you can probably help me with that.

Yes.

It's just I know how I am with my feelings, and I base every reaction off my feelings. And I just feel like, like I tell this to everybody, my feelings would never ever again be invalidated by anybody because they were always invalidated. But now when I turned 18 and I walked outta that group home, anything that I feel I'm gonna do based off of what I wanna do. And if you're not in that, then you're just not in it. Or if I feel like you switched up one time, you're gonna forever.

I get that.

And I'm gonna try to get revenge and I don't like that and I hate that about myself.

I understand why this behavior was continuing and it's not just about the oppositional defiance or it's not about the bipolar diagnosis. It's about you feeling as if the love that I deserved as a little girl, I didn't get. And every time someone hurt me, I will never not be able to protect myself now as an adult. And so you're gonna protect yourself by any means necessary. You do one thing, I'm gonna show you you can't do that to me anymore. I'm gonna show you that I'm not the one. But the problem is, is that you're a mother now. And so the family unit you didn't have as a child, you do have now. And you're the matriarch of it.

Yes.

And so you have to understand that those decisions are going to start affecting your children even more.

Right. 'Cause now I spent 30 days away from them that I can never get back.

Exactly.

So it's all—

Exactly.

And I blame him and his family for that. And that's why I have the hatred that I have. Because if it had not went that far, which I put myself in it, I will always say that was my fault.

Of course.

But I just don't believe that if they would've just accepted the pregnancy and they would've accepted my son the first time, and we didn't have to go to, I feel like none of this would've ever happened 'cause we were all close before that happened.

But what you really should have done in that moment was accept the fact that it doesn't matter what other people say or do to you because you in control of this now.

See, that's the work you have to do.

When you have the history and the past that you have, the work you have to do is realizing that nobody's words or nobody's actions can actually affect you anymore like they did when you were a little girl. So what I would encourage you to do from here on out is for you to realize that you deserve more in a relationship and you should never go back and forth with this, okay?

You can be a good co-parent, I believe it, and y'all can do that together.

'Cause what I need you to do is focus on your children and focus on the family you're building now and focus on healthier decisions and things will work out, all right?

I really wish y'all the best of luck.

I really sincerely do.

God honor.