My Mom Dated Both Men, Who's My Dad? | KARAMO

Two weeks ago, I got a random email from a random guy, and I don't know what told me to click on it, but I did. Clicked on the email, and he was saying all this personal stuff that only me and immediate family would know.

Yeah.

So I'm like, oh wow. Like, it was crazy.

So what, hold on, we have the email. I wanna see what he was saying to you and why he hit you up. Okay, it says, I've been looking for my biological daughter for more than 22 years. I hope and pray that you are my daughter. Just out the blue?

Out the blue.

Girl, what'd you do?

I don't know how I was feeling in that moment.

Yes, of course.

So I was with my godmom, my mom, and I turned to her, I'm like, somebody just texted me saying that they my dad. And she like, your dad? I'm like, yeah. So I tried to call my dad and he didn't answer, so.

'Cause who did you believe was your father up until this point?

Antonio.

The man that raised you?

He raised me my whole life. That's the only thing that I knew.

Wow.

Okay, so we talked to both of your potential fathers earlier and let's see what they had to say.

I need to know if I'm Nya's father.

I need to know if I'm Nya's father.

Let me tell you about my relationship with Nya's mother.

Let me tell you about my relationship with Nya's mother.

Nya's mother, Tanya, was my first love. We were together for years, and then she moved to St. Louis. That's when she met Greg.

I met Tanya in 2003, and from that point on, we were in a relationship.

Even though Tanya was with Greg, we never stopped fooling around. Then she got pregnant with Nigel.

Tanya and I broke up after she got pregnant.

When Tanya was pregnant, she found out Greg was married, and they stopped seeing each other. I told Tanya, even though it's a chance that this baby is not mine, I will still take care of her.

Even though Tanya and I wasn't together, I still signed Nya's birth certificate and I was part of her life. When Nya was 6 months old, I went to go visit her, come to find out that Tanya had moved. She just left town with my baby.

When Nya was a baby, Tanya spiraled out of control on drugs and Nya ended up in foster care. When Nya was 5 years old, I was finally able to legally adopt her. Nya has been with me ever since.

I never stopped searching for Nya. Even when I found out that she was adopted, I still continued my search. 2 weeks ago, I finally found Nia on Facebook. I sent her an email, and for the first time in 22 years, I was able to connect with my daughter.

No matter what, Nia will always be my daughter, but I'm here to find out the DNA truth.

Okay, so—

We gonna take a deep breath together. Come on, let's take a deep breath. Whew, 'cause that was a lot for me. Because like, you have been thinking this man right here is my father my entire life. And then out of nowhere, just 2 weeks, it's like boom, let me just crumble everything that you know. Before this email, did you have any idea that Antonio might not be your father?

No. None? He was saying like, when I asked him about it, he was saying like, oh yeah, I had a conversation with you when you were a teenager. I'm like, I would've remembered that. Like that's something that you don't forget.

You don't forget that, yeah.

So I was like, no, no, I don't remember that.

Did you ever know your mother? 'Cause I know he said in this that your mother was on drugs at some point. Did you ever know her?

No.

Okay, you never met her.

And she passed 2 years ago when I was pregnant with my first baby.

Got it, got it, got it. And how was your first conversation with Greg?

Oh my God, I was feeling so many emotions. I was confused, I was angry, I was happy, I was sad, I was everything all in one. 'Cause it just opened up a lot of old wounds that I healed from. Like, you know, growing up and stuff like that. And everything kind of made sense 'cause I always felt unwanted. I always, everybody made me the problem child. So I was that, they made me feel like an outsider.

[Speaker] Well, I think it's time to hear Antonio's side of the story. So everyone please welcome Antonio to the show. [APPLAUSE] How you doing, Antonio?

I'm good.

Nice to meet you. So I'm wanting to hear from your perspective. What was it like for you to hear that Greg had reached out to Nia?

I was devastated. I hated it because of the past, you know, with Greg's relationship with Nia's mom.

Yeah.

And you know, I always just wanted to protect all of my kids, you know? But I was devastated.

Did you ever think that Greg would resurface?

I never thought in a million years.

Yeah.

'Cause I didn't see her text message, 'cause I was just calling her, giving her some good news that what I had going on in my personal, and she mentioned it. And then I was like, well, what is his name? And she said, Gregor Bell. And I'm like, whoa.

Yeah.

I mean, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Yeah, I'm sure. So why didn't you tell Aniyah that you might not be her father?

I mean, you know, like, I look at it like I have 5 kids. I might as well just go and just tell each one of 'em, hey, I might not be your dad, I might not be your dad, I might not be your dad, I might not be your dad, you know?

So do you have questions about the other 4 children too?

No.

Oh, you don't, okay then.

I feel like something still should've been said because that put me in a predicament of not knowing and being shocked. I feel like that's something that we should've sat down and talked about up when I was 18. So when, if it was possible that he came about, it wouldn't be crumbling down right now.

I mean, you know, I did, I had a conversation with Nya. I see that, you know, I was backstage looking and she was saying that she didn't recall the conversation, but my auntie brought it to her attention at a point in time. And I had a conversation, I'm like, "Nya," I said, "If you ever feel that you wanna take a DNA," I said.

I don't remember that.

Yeah, and it was like 3 years, but if you don't remember, you don't. I can't force her, but I recall the conversation.

I think that's something that I would remember, the conversation, that's something that I would remember.

I will say this, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt because I can only understand as being a father raising 5 children, not wanting to cause a disruption disruption in your home. And so even if you did tell her, if you did not, I'm not here to judge that. But I could understand that the position of, if I'm raising you and I'm trying to do the best, any disruption that I'm adding to the house is gonna cause extra problems. Like say, if I already know you're being rebellious in your point of view, not saying you were, but if you feel like there's rebellion, now it's like, now I'm gonna give you more ammunition for that rebellion. Why would I do that? So I could understand your point of view because that's a tricky place to be in. Do you believe you've been a good father, Niall?

I tried my very best. I did.

Yeah.

I feel like, yes, you were a good provider, but you wasn't emotionally available for me. That's why, like, I used to shut down all the time because it was like, no matter if you was wrong, you were still right in your eyes. That's how I always felt. So I kind of just buried everything that I was feeling and I never said nothing about it.

It's time for Nia to finally meet her potential father, Greg. Are you ready for this?

I'm nervous.

I know you nervous. Well, we're all here for you. So everyone, please welcome Greg to the show.

Hey, I'm gonna have you sit in the middle.

How's it going, Greg? Great. Nice to meet you. Here you go. I see you're emotional. What's making you emotional in this moment?

This. This.

You've been searching for her your entire, her entire life?

22 years.

22 years. What is it like finally being with her after all these years?

A dream come true.

A dream come true.

Uh-huh. It filled a lot of void that I had in my life. Uh-huh. You know, I was, I didn't feel complete until I found her.

Did you ever see her as a baby?

I seen her, yes. I seen her from up until her mom left. Uh-huh.

Tell me about your first conversation with Nya.

Got the email back from her saying it was okay for me to give her a call. I was at work. I said, first things first, let me ask you a question. Is Tanya Sherrell Cooper your mother? She said yes. I said, you're my daughter. You're my daughter. This is my daughter.

I really feel that, you know, if Greg, if you coming along in her life, I feel that It should be started off with honesty because I legally adopted Nya in St. Louis and them folks took months and years reaching out to you. Like they had to get some type of consent from the parent. Like ran newspaper, they ran ads, like they sat in child protective for 2 and a half years. I had to fight tooth and nail. The only reason why I couldn't just pick her up because I wasn't on her birth certificate.

They never got in contact with me because they never had any address on me to even get in contact with me. The way that I found out that she had been adopted is through me and my son was searching, my oldest son was searching for her. And he like, "Dad, well, I finally got it through the family court." And how many years later was that? That was maybe in 2006. 'Cause that— Can I talk please? Yes.

Cut it.

That's bogus. Let me talk. You know, and I searched for my daughter, no matter what he says or anyone says, for 22 years. Even when I found out that it was a sealed adoption, where I couldn't get any information on her until she turned 18, I continued to search and search on Facebook to see if I could come up with anything. I didn't know if they changed her last name or anything, I just knew it by mine. So maybe about almost, it's been 3 weeks almost now. I was on Facebook and I seen this one group that says, "Find Your Siblings." So I'm like, "Hmm, let me try this." On Wednesday, I was at work, I got a text, a message from some young lady within a group that searches databases for situations like this. And she had Nias' 2 email addresses on there and her Facebook page. That's when I emailed her and sent her the email that I sent her. So what he says and what anybody else says, I searched for my daughter.

Searching her name, you could've came up with something. Her name is not on Facebook. What you gotta understand, the relationship you had with the mom, how you came in her mom's life and how you lied to her, I just don't want the same for, 'cause you proposed to her.

I never proposed.

Yes you did, she had a ring. She had a ring, her mom did.

She could have a ring on all she want. I never proposed to me. —Me and Tanya never got to that stage, nowhere close to that. So that's a lie right there. That's a lie that she probably told him. Now it's always two sides to a story. I never ever proposed to Tanya.

Me and Tanya, we were just really pretty much— Did you ever tell her that you were married? Yeah, she knew I was married.

Coming out of the relationship, that's one reason why she wanted me to be with her. I couldn't be with her 'cause I was coming out of the marriage.

[Speaker] I'm gonna say this 'cause I wanna take it back a little bit, and I also wanna make sure that we refocus. Can you at least acknowledge that the reason he has anger is because he's raised Nya? And if Nya is your child, we don't know yet, he's raised your child for 22 years. And so there is going to be a passion, there is going to be, Can you have a little respect for the fact that he did raise her? I applaud that.

I'm not taking anything that he did for my daughter away from him. And I appreciate that, let me tell you that much.

Nia, are you ready to find out the DNA too?

Yeah.

In this envelope is the DNA truth. One says if Antonio is your father or is not your father, and the other says if Greg is your father or not your father. You have waited 22 years. I think you've waited long enough. These are your truths to open, not mine.

I feel like regardless, Dad, regardless of how this comes out, you'll forever be my dad and I'll forever love you.

Oh my gosh, what does it say?

It's telling you this is not your biological Greg is your biological father.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I know that you have tried your best. That's why I needed to make sure earlier we shifted it. I know what you tried to do and I know how hard you worked.

I never stopped looking for you.

And I also know working in this system how hard it is for a man to step up and how much you went through to get that little girl. And I don't want that to ever, ever be taken away from you. You have done a damn good job. Damn good job.

And I want you to have that relationship with him still, okay? And I, like I told you, I got you. Now this is a new journey for us. We're gonna walk it through. No lies, no deception, none of it. Anything you need to know from me that you haven't got answers for, I'll give them to you. To you. Thank you, Jesus.

How are you feeling this moment? I'm sad and I'm happy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 'Cause in this moment you have to grieve a relationship that you've known while also being excited about exploring something new. Yeah. What are your thoughts right now, Greg? I'm mixed. You excited?

Looking forward to the new journey.

Yeah.

Something I've been trying to have 22 years, I can begin to start and making things right. Making her feel like I'm her dad. Know that I'm her dad.

[Speaker:KARAMO] I'm gonna tell you this. One of the things when you two were hugging is that I had to make sure that I let him know that though there was times that you didn't feel the best, I understand what it takes for him to have gotten you out of the system. There's a love and a devotion that it takes for this man to have found you. And I want that to be honored because for 22 years he did the best that he could with the resources he had. And of course parents mess up and I'm sorry for the ways you felt. This is not to discard the way you felt, but he tried his best. And if there's any advice I can give you is two pieces, which is he was right. Please have your intentions be the best because this young woman deserves nothing but the love and support that she's always wanted, that she's gotten from him, but even more that she's asking for right now. I know. But as well, I ask that you do me a big favor and honor what this man has done. I do.

I honor what he did for me. I honor, I respect, maybe you may not feel that, but I respect what he did for my daughter.

Yeah, well, the one thing we know is that to be true for you to know is that two things can be true at once. This can be your biological father, but this can also be your dad. And I want you to use this time, I want you to use this time, and I mean this, I want you to use this time be selfish. If you do that, I promise you this moment will guide you to what is better and what is best for you and your children. And I wish you all the best of luck. I'm here for all of y'all if y'all need anything. All right, I'm glad you got your answers.

Stay with us, friends. We'll be right back with more.