In this episode of The Karamo Show, host Karamo mediates a tense mother‑daughter relationship between Monique, a single mother and two‑time cancer survivor, and her 18‑year‑old daughter Kamiyah, with Monique’s brother Cameron also present. Monique expresses deep anguish over Kamiyah’s disrespectful behavior that began in middle school, fearing her daughter’s future and feeling unloved despite her sacrifices. Kamiyah shares feeling unloved, labeled the “problem child,” and lacking emotional connection, especially physical affection, from her mother. The dialogue reveals a pattern of miscommunication, mutual resentment, and a cycle where each mirrors the other's anger. Cameron provides an outsider’s view, noting he’s often forced to choose between his sister and mother and urges mutual apologies and hugs. Karamo employs therapeutic techniques: private backstage talks, active listening, validation, prompting each party to articulate what they appreciate about the other, and encouraging concrete commitments to try and improve communication. The session culminates in both mother and daughter expressing love, promising to try, and acknowledging the need to remember each other's positive qualities during future conflicts.
Chapters
I need help. My child, she's been so disrespectful. 7th to 8th grade, she started acting out. I could just say one word and the fireworks begin. Slamming doors, banging a hole in the wall. Hole this big. Punching holes in the wall. Mentally, It's crushing me. I really don't know why she hate me. I don't know why she don't like me. I don't know anything when I've given everything I've had. Being a single parent, a mom of 4, I wanted better for them. There are times where I didn't eat, but I made sure my kids didn't go without. Being a cancer survivor twice, that's hard in itself. Knowing if something were to happen to me today or tomorrow, where would my child end up? She's heading down the wrong road. I feel she's gonna end up dead or in jail. Where did I go wrong? I'm sorry.
There's a lot of emotion and there's a lot to unpack here. We'll talk to Monique shortly, but I want to start with Kamiyah, but before we bring Kamiyah out here, I want to have a moment with her alone backstage. So I wanna go back there and talk to her first. Kamiyah.
Hello.
How you doing?
Good, and you?
Nice to meet you. May I have a hug?
Yes.
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you too. So thanks for being here. You look fresh from head to toe. So I want you to tell me your version of all of this.
I want a bond with my mom. I don't think I have one. I'm always called the problematic, the problem child.
Yeah.
No positive words.
Yeah.
Whatsoever.
Do you feel like your mom loves you?
At times. She's not a mean person, but no, majority of the time, no.
No, at all. And how long have you felt that way?
For a while now, since I would say like my 8th grade, 15.
So you said 7th, 8th grade you've been feeling this way?
Yes.
Yeah, got it. And that's when you felt like she started treating you differently?
Yes.
Yeah. And what happened that you felt like made her start treating you differently?
Maybe because how I react to things. We never really had time to really talk. Every time we do talk, it's like a moment where, okay, we talk about it and if it go wrong, boom.
Got it.
It just clash and we just go separate ways.
So you try to talk about it, but it doesn't work.
It doesn't work.
So what's making you so angry?
Her being mean to me. I can never talk or express my feelings and me not having a voice. And always, she always telling me, well, since I'm 18 now, like I can do stuff for myself.
Oh, so she's like, you're an adult, you gotta—
Yes. I feel like me personally is because of my little brother.
Your little brother?
Yes.
What goes on with your little brother?
My mom tells him since I don't respect her, he doesn't have to respect me.
I wanna come back here first and talk to you because even though people might say you're an adult, you're still 18. Yes. I still see the child in you. Are you ready to talk?
Yes.
You wanna come out with me?
Yes.
All right. So what do you want from your mom today?
For her, well, what I didn't have in a long time, a hug. Or like, us to just talk about things.
Yeah.
And to make our relationship better.
Yeah. You told my producers that you want your mom to say, "I love you." Yes, she says it, but—
You don't care? No, I feel like it's forced.
Well, listen, I wanna see what Monique has to say about this. So everyone, let's meet her. Let's meet Monique. Hi, Monique, how you doing? Thank you. Thank you for being here. Take a seat, Mom.
Thank you.
So what do you feel about what your daughter has said?
I feel as if she's pushed me to the point to where I don't wanna be bothered with her. She's been so rude. Respect is due to a dog. If you talk to me in that manner, Imagine what you're gonna say to other people. Me being an only child, you know, I don't know what it was to have a hug from my mom. So it's like it's a pattern repeating itself.
Got it.
Do I wanna be like that? No.
So in your opinion, when did she start acting out?
I wanna say 7th, 8th grade. I wanna say 7th, 8th grade. It started as, and you know what, it was before that. I've gotten into arguments with my mom, my grandmother about her. Oh, you need to stop her from saying this. You need to stop her from doing it. Me always being superwoman, I'm gonna come to the defense of my child. No, oh, Kamiyah needs this. You spoil her too much, you do this, but That's all I know. That's all I know how to do is give out love. I don't know how to give out nothing else. But when you've hurt my heart so much, it pushes me back in my own space.
Vice versa.
I don't wanna be around her. And that's bad. I shouldn't have to feel that way. I shouldn't have to feel that way. This my only daughter.
Yeah.
All I want is Kamiyah to understand It's not easy out here. I don't want my child to end up dead. I don't want my child to end up homeless somewhere where she can't defend for, you know, fend for herself because she's steady pushing people away. And people only want the best for her.
But the only people I push away is you. I feel like I changed.
So why push me away?
'Cause you don't understand me. I can't change if you don't try.
Do you feel like your cancer diagnosis has made you push your daughter away?
No, because even with that, that's all the more reasons why I need her.
What do y'all think needs to happen to mend this relationship from y'all's opinion?
Try to understand each other better.
Okay. What about for you?
Better communication.
Okay. Karamo's brother Cameron is here with us today. Let's hear what he has to say. So everyone please welcome Cameron to the show. Hey Cameron, how you doing? Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you as well. Good to meet you too. All right, so did you grow up with your mom?
When I grew up, my mom was always there for sure. I grew up living with my grandmother though, and not with my mom. I moved in a little later.
Go ahead.
And what have you witnessed?
I witnessed a lot of arguments, fights, basically everything they described. And I love my sister to death. I love my sister and my mom. I feel like a lot of times though, they make me, they put me in the middle of it and it forces me to have to choose between sister or mom.
Got it.
And I hate to have to do that sometimes, you know, and I can honestly admit that sometimes, you know, I do run to my mother's defense all the time. I really, really would just like for them to apologize to each other and, you know, and hug. And I feel like it has to come to an end at some point. So I feel like, you know, Kamiyah, you need to apologize. Also, Mom, I feel like you need to apologize. You know, hug it out if y'all can.
I gotta tell you, Cameron, I appreciate you giving me some perspective there because you added the last piece of this that I need to understand. Because there's things that are going on here that I'm seeing. First of all, your daughter mimics your behavior. And you're nodding your head right now. So you agreeing that there's identical behavior? Have you ever acknowledged that y'all have identical behavior?
No.
How does it feel to see your son and a stranger tell you, I'm witnessing, he's nodding his head and saying it's the same? I do believe that there was anger that started early on. That started a path of like, I need to figure out how to express myself. I need to have people hear me. I had people listen to me. And I think at that point she didn't feel like you could fully hear her. And that started her being more aggravated. And tell me if I'm wrong. And it just started to spiral 'cause now you're aggravated, she's aggravated, you're aggravated, and then she shuts down and then she's like, damn, but I miss my mom. And when she comes back to you, you're like, I can't be bothered right now. And then when you're ready, she's pissed about something else. And now you're upset. The truth of the matter is, is that what I've heard consistently from the oldest, now to her, to them, is that you're a good mom throughout. So your motherhood and what you've done as a mother is not under question here. And I wanna make sure that's clear because sometimes it can feel like when there is your child talking to you like, maybe I'm the worst mother in your world. Your daughter's crying because she still loves you. This is your baby and she still loves you and wants to be with you. You know that, right? 'Cause I heard you say earlier, you would not even, if I was your mother, you wouldn't mess with me. Let me tell you something. Yes, she would. I believed her when she says she protects you out in the world. I believe her when she doesn't talk mess about you because I believe that's your characteristic. I believe you're loyal like that. I believe that's you.
It is.
Which makes complete sense. And that's who she's picking up. She's mimicking you. There you go.
It's okay.
I'm gonna ask you a question. Can you tell your daughter what good you see in her?
She's a good person. Her heart is big. She's very helpful and she's thoughtful. It's just the moment you piss off, it's just—
I get that, but we not going to go down that path. What I want right now is because we both know, we both know y'all have some issues. Similar attitudes. That's why I established that first. So we don't have to talk about when she gets into attitude because we know it's there. She just needs to know what do you like about her? Because she's a young 18-year-old woman who's feeling very vulnerable right now. And you said that you didn't get it from your mom either. And I'm sure there's a point in your life that you would've just loved your mom to say, "Damn, you are great. You are smart, you're kind, you're giving." And that's why you ended up being this mother that spoils your kids. Am I right? You would've loved your mother to do that to you.
Correct, yes.
Just tell her right now what is good. You started with the thoughtful, you said she's kind.
Tell her. I mean, again, you're very talented and now that you all have made it clearer to me, I do see it, Eric. I do see it, but you're an amazing person, Kamiyah. You too.
I love you.
Love you more. You can look at me. I love you.
I love you more.
I don't want nothing bad.
So. Yeah. Now the reason I said that, the reason I wanted you to first acknowledge that y'all are the same and then second tell her what's good is because the next time y'all both get into these arguments, I want y'all to go into remembering what's good about each other.
Yes.
I believe y'all can do this. I really do.
I do too.
Can you look at your mother and tell her I love you?
I love you.
And I'm gonna try. You gonna tell her you gonna try?
I'm gonna try.
You gonna try?
I'm gonna try, most definitely.
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Yes!
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