My Mom Drinks And Puts Hand On Me! | KARAMO

Okay, so you gotta tell me about these physical fights that you and your mother are getting into.

Okay, so like she's hit me with a pan and it's bent me, like the pan bent. I've gotten hit in the head with a vase and it shattered all of my head. She punches me.

When did that start? How old were you?

I'd say about 16.

16?

Yeah.

And what makes your mother so upset?

I guess my, My mouth, me being, talking combative with her. But when she drinks, like anything can set her off when she drinks.

You said could be my mouth. Do you have a mouth?

I got a mouth. I will admit that I'm smart and I'm saying what's on my mind.

At least you can own that. Okay, my producers say her words cut deep. What does she say to you?

She say that I'm a bitch ass. Like, hey, who says that to your kid? "I'm a bitch that sometimes she hates me, but I ain't gonna be shit without her." It's like, how can you do that to your own kid?

Was she always like this with you?

It wasn't bad. Of course, mother and son, they get into it here and there, but it didn't really get bad until like, I'll say 2016 when she, with her and her girlfriend, they broke up, a 10-year relationship. So after then it was kind of a spiraling, Down.

Is that when she, from your point of view, she started drinking?

She's always drunk here and there occasionally and stuff, but I can say that that took a lot on her. A teen relationship, that's a lot. So I don't blame her, but it's just don't take it out on your son.

Yeah, okay. You lived with your grandmother for some time, right?

Yeah, when I was like around 8, 9.

Yeah, so why were you living with her?

My grandma, she was just my best friend. She just got me. I was able, sorry, she's not here no more, so. She was my best friend, so I was able to go to her and talk to her about really anything. So that was just my go-to person. And of course that's my grandma, so she spoiled me. So I can say I'm very rotten spoiled. I lived with her 'cause I had better friends than with my mom. When I was here, my mom and girlfriend was always moving every single year. So I could never have a, I could never make real friends at school because we was always moving.

Yeah.

So I was like, now let me go back with my grandma and go to a school that I've already got friends at and already have relationships there. So that's why ultimately I went back with my grandma.

Did you ever live on your own?

I moved out, I'd say about 2020. Right when the pandemic happened, me and my mom got into it really, really bad. She came into the room with an extension cord. She was drunk, of course, and was playing, and she started hitting me with it. But she was jokingly, but it was hurting me for real. So I was like, "Chill out, chill out. I'm not in the mood to play." So me getting upset with her, then she got upset because I'm upset. So it went from there to, My mouth was smart, so I probably said some slick shit, and she got to hitting me again and got to throwing my trophies around that I've earned, throwing my stuff around, destroyed my whole room, emptied out my drawers, and we got into it real bad. And my best friend even tried to get in between, and she slapped the fuck outta him. Wow.

And why did you end up moving back in?

The lease was up and it was time for me and my best friends to go our own ways. And also my grandma was sick, so I was like, I'm gonna stay and help out with her. I say a week after I got back, my grandma had fell on the ground and she needed help getting up. So I'm asleep. All I hear my momma yelling, "Karamo, come on, come on, come on." And I go and help her and trying to get my grandma up. I guess I wasn't moving fast enough for her and she's like, "Hurry up!" And so I, She didn't hit me in my mouth and we get into it. And then I said something, I don't know what I said, but she ended up grabbing the vase and hit me on the head with it while my grandma is on the ground still yelling like, that's what the last memories that I got of her. 'Cause after that she ended up going to the hospital and she never came back.

Got it. What do you want from your mom today?

I just want her to take accountability and to own up Better communication. I just don't, I don't want everything to have to turn physical and I just want, I don't want her to just have to hit me all the time.

Yeah. So it's the anger, the physical stuff?

Yes.

The hitting? Okay. You heard, you brought up your trophies as well. You want her to stop breaking your stuff?

Yeah, my stuff. I worked hard, my defense, I got the X, so I worked hard. Those were first place, second place trophies and I don't even have those now. Got it.

Well everyone, I think it's time to meet Gina, your mother, to share what she thinks what she has to say about this. Everyone, please welcome Gina to the show.

You don't take accountability.

You gonna already start. Accountability for what?

Mentally, physically abusing me, like all that.

That's accountability for things that you do.

I am going to take care of this.

What you're gonna do is sit down.

We can both sit down.

You're gonna sit down because you listen. I'm not doing that with you.

I'm not doing that. We're gonna sit down. We'll just sit down. I'm here to work on this for us. Mm-hmm.

So how do you feel about, thank you for being here, first of all. How do you feel about what was just said?

So some of this stuff was merged together.

Okay.

So some of this stuff did happen, but not in the order, in the fashion that he said it did.

I understand.

And so I'm a reactor. So he's, look how big he is. You're my son. I'm your mother.

But that doesn't give you the right to put your hands on me.

You gonna let me speak?

Are you gonna let me? You don't have to put your hands on me though.

Yeah, but you don't gotta get in my face. You stand up and you get up You're in my face like I'm your friend or somebody that you wanna whoop they ass on the street.

I act like a friend all the time though.

And so say less. And so when I start treating you exactly like your mother, you're not gonna fucking like it.

But being like my mother doesn't mean that you have to be stern with me.

Yes I do.

It doesn't.

Yes I do.

That does not mean that. Yes I do. No it doesn't. Yes I do. It doesn't.

Yes I have to be stern with you.

No we don't.

'Cause your mouth, your mouth is what do all this.

Same mouth that I got, the same mouth that you have. I got it from you.

Well, you an individual.

Gina, I wanna know, how do you feel when he called the cops on you?

I was done. I was done. He didn't even have to do that. I just asked him to leave.

What you had to do? You physically hit me with a pan and a bit. I had a bruise.

I did. I still cook with a pan.

It hurt.

Yeah.

Okay, and you're proud about that?

I am.

For what?

Because I'm not proud about hitting you, It's a reaction. You made me do that. I didn't have to do it.

I didn't make you.

I did, I hit you. Yeah, I did, because you're not gonna get in my face, make me feel intimidated. You a big dude, you 6'3".

So did I really just get in your face? Walk up to you and just got in your face? No, that did not happen like that.

Yeah, that's normally how it happens.

No, no.

That's normally how it happens.

No, you be mad because—

So I just go off on you for no reason?

Am I being a mama?

You wanna hold accountability. When are you gonna be accountable for your actions?

I am accountable.

No, you're not. You sit here blaming me for everything. You're blaming me for everything. What about you? What do you do? It's not all on me. It takes two.

But who's getting physical? Who's getting physical?

Me, 'cause I wish you would hit me. I wish you would hit me.

I wouldn't hit you.

I wish you would. I wish you would. And I won't. You know what's gonna happen if you do?

Gina, do you get physical with anyone else in your life?

No, because nobody else talks to me like this. I don't have to deal with nobody the way I have to deal with him. So no, I don't.

Mm-hmm.

Your son brought up a lot of drinking. Do you still drink?

I drink occasionally, yes. But yeah, I was going through some stuff and yeah, I was drinking every day. But that's not, everything didn't happen because I was drinking.

Gina, I wanna know from you, what kind of stuff were you going through at that time?

So I lost my mother, I lost my brother 9 months apart.

Okay.

Then I have to deal with this.

I grew up with my mother and my brother, they are dead.

We are supposed to be as one. I'm not supposed to have to deal with all of that backlash and all that talking that he does.

Yeah.

I'm your mother. I am your mother.

Okay, now I understand that.

And I ain't never called you no bitch ass.

You have called me.

What I gotta lie for?

What do I have to lie for? You might not remember 'cause you were drinking like I said, but I remember everything you had said to me. Bitch ass, bum. I ain't call you no bum. I saw it that day when we got into it and you kept attacking me, almost broke my window, was throwing stuff. You said that I ain't shit.

I said you're not gonna be shit without me because what I mean by that, what I mean by that is I'm your backbone. You are nothing without me in the sense of having somewhere to go, having somebody to pay your phone bill, having somebody to pay your car note when you don't wanna work and when you go in between 6 and 7 jobs in 3 months. I didn't have to do that, you grown.

She supports me, but—

Has she always supported you like that?

Always. Always when I'm off.

He do that because he know that he got somebody to lean on, depend on. I don't have nobody to depend on. I'm it, I'm it.

Well, it seems like you always depending on me 'cause you always begging me to stay. I could have been moved out in June. Like I've been saying, I could have been moved. I had a good job, but I could have been moved out and still moved out right now. But you always said, let's go 'cause it's financially better. Is it financially better for us or is it financially better for you?

Jaquan, you missed what your mother said. When you said, why do you want me to move back in? You skipped the finances, but she said 3 times outta her mouth, for the love, for the love, for the love. Did you hear her say that?

I didn't. But I—

You didn't, you didn't, you didn't. She just said it right now. I see the breakdown and how y'all are ready quickly. Y'all don't hear each other. There's been anger in this relationship for many years and y'all stopped hearing each other a long time ago. Y'all stopped hearing each other. You don't hear her, she don't hear you, and y'all just go back and forth.

I can admit that. That happens a lot.

I saw it, I saw it right now. That's why I just asked you. If you heard her say the love and you just said outta your mouth right here, you didn't hear that because you've trained your ears to not hear anything of that nature. And what you're going through, I understand why. If you've been hit and you feel like someone's gonna attack me, of course, and vice versa. I know for you, you've had your challenges of losing somebody that you were in a relationship for 10 years. You have these things. And so he goes off with his mouth and then you stop hearing what he's actually asking for and it starts to turn into a fight. Do you think you deserve an apology?

Absolutely, 'cause he never apologizes. He never apologizes.

Vice versa.

Do you respect your mother?

I do, I do respect her. I can't tell. Mm-hmm.

What do you respect about your mother?

She was a strong woman and she raised me by herself with my grandma. But just because I get smart at the mouth doesn't mean you have to physically hit me.

I 100% agree. He also said earlier that you broke his trophies.

Well, and I went to him to get the trophy fixed. I was gonna get it fixed. He threw it away.

I know, that's the love part.

Yeah, I was gonna get it fixed. That's the love part. I did break it.

There's no question in me that there's love in your heart for your child. What is the issue here is the physical abuse and the lack of respect. You've acknowledged it many times that your mouth is bad.

It is, it is.

And I watched your action when your mom came out. You did step up before she even came out. You stood up before she could even get a chance.

Maybe I shouldn't have stood up.

Who you telling that to, me?

I shouldn't have came at you like that. I'm so sorry. I apologize.

I know, I accept that. I appreciate you for apologizing for that. I really appreciate that.

Yeah, yeah.

He just apologized to you. If you want your son to really be around you, there has to be respect that has to start going in the house.

They go in both ways.

I get it. You heard what I did first. I had him apologize to you and acknowledge his mouth and how he stood up. So now that he's done that, can you understand that this is a 23-year-old man and if you really want him to be with you, 'cause y'all, he's all you have left, there's gonna have to be more honest communication and you're gonna have to understand his feelings as much as he understands yours.

Absolutely.

Every time you hit him, you know it hurts his self-esteem.

Every time he jumps in my face and gets to talking to me crazy, what do you think it does to me?

I know that. That's why I had him apologize first. But now I'm asking you as his mother, can you say, I gotta give him, every time you hit him, it's hurting his self-esteem. Okay, man, we know what happened to broken Black men in this world. Do you want that?

No, I don't.

Who are you telling me?

No, I don't. I don't want that. And I do apologize for hitting you.

I'm giving you the first step. So what can you do from here? Because this is the thing, and I'm gonna be real with you, I know you're grieving and I could see the pain. And I also heard a mother crying out saying, "I just walked you around 'cause I love you." I heard all of it in one and you've lost, You've lost your brother and I don't want to see you lose your son. And for your son to bring you here, it means that we're getting closer.

Yes.

And he apologized and he knows he has a mouth. I know where he got the mouth from. But it's gonna be up to you to say we can work on it from here on out.

I'm sorry.

I love you. I love you.

I love you too.

I don't want you to lose your mom. I know there's love here and y'all can do it, okay? I wish y'all the best of luck.

I wish you the best of luck.

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