My Sister Forgot My Birthday, Now She's DEAD To Me! | KARAMO

My guest Jasmine says the last message she got from her sister, Mali, was a death wish. They haven't spoken in 2 years and are here to see if their relationship can be saved. We'll meet Jasmine shortly, but let's start with Mali and hear her side of the story. So everyone, please welcome Mali to the show.

Thank you for having me.

So let me be clear.

Okay.

Is it you that sent the death threat to your sister?

I absolutely did.

Okay, and why?

Yeah, because I feel like if you say you care about me, right?

Uh-huh.

And if you forget my birthday, It's my birthday, you don't care about me at all. Like you actually hate me. That's what goes through my mind.

You got it.

I said what I said, okay?

So y'all are beefing over your birthday?

Because she forgot, right?

Is this a consistent pattern where she forgets?

It just happened that one time, but that's all it takes with me. One time. You get the boot and you get the boot.

Got it. You said, that's cool, I promise you ain't gotta worry about hearing from me again. You had all day to remember it's my birthday, but obviously you don't think about me at all. "I took you and blank out to celebrate your birthday and both of y'all forgot mine. Literally y'all can both die, you and him and that man you call a father. And it's crazy, we were just now getting closer, girl.

Bye." Am I wrong though for wanting to be a priority to someone? Wanting to feel like that? I don't think I'm wrong.

No, no.

Maybe what I said might have been a little bit wrong, but.

What led up to that text message?

I was waiting to hear from her all day. And she went the whole day without talking to me. She didn't call me, didn't text me, but she called me to ask me why her phone wasn't working because I put her on my cell phone plan.

Yeah. So when she had called for the phone plan, it was your birthday.

It was my birthday.

And she just started to talk about her own needs.

Exactly.

And you were like, okay.

Yeah.

So what happened when you confronted Jasmine?

I didn't. That's all I said to her and I blocked her and I canceled her phone line the very next day.

Okay. Have you tried moving? Have you tried reaching out to your sister since?

No, I haven't.

You haven't tried reaching out? No. And it's been 2 years.

2 years because I hold grudges. Not only one sibling forgot my birthday, another sibling forgot. Got it. And their birthdays are 2 days apart.

Got it. So. So that's what you were referencing in that message. Yes. Both of them that you took out to dinner. Yeah. Okay. Has she tried reaching out to you?

I think, but maybe through social media, but I don't use social media.

Aside from missing your birthday, why else are you upset at Jasmine?

Because I feel like she only wants to communicate with me when she wants something. And then when those big moments come around, she's nowhere to be found.

How was your relationship with your sister growing up?

Well, I mean, we weren't raised together.

I noticed something in that text that you said, you said, and we're just getting close to each other.

That's what I, yeah. Yeah. We weren't raised together, but as adults we wanted to get to know each other and build that bond. But for you to do something like that, that just completely destroyed it.

So at what age did y'all start to get together to try to build that bond?

Just a few years ago, so maybe 2018.

Okay, so—

From 2018 to 2020, we were pretty close. Fell off, lost communication, and then we connected again in, I wanna say 2022.

Okay then, and do you have the same parents?

We have the same father.

Same father, but different mother.

That's why I said that.

That makes it your father.

Yeah.

Got it, makes sense. Okay, I'm connecting the dots here.

I don't claim him either.

Oh, okay. Did you have a bad relationship with your dad?

No, he was just never there.

Okay, was he there for her more?

Yes.

Okay, why do you want to mend the relationship now?

Well, because she's my sister. I'm the oldest sibling to both of them. And I just wanna be there and try to bring her up with me. But she has to learn that sometimes the little things do matter. And I'm the type of person that they do matter too. Just don't forget my birthday. That's the, at the end of the day.

Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, this is the first time that y'all have seen each other in 2 years, right?

Yes.

Are you ready to see your sister?

I mean, does she deserve an acknowledgement? We'll see.

Well, everyone, please welcome Jasmine to the show. So I wanna ask you, how do you feel about the situation? First of all, welcome to the show.

Thank you.

How do you feel about the situation you just heard?

I don't know, I really wanna beat the shit outta you. Honestly.

What's making you angry?

She's supposed to be my big sister. Even if I forgot your birthday, you still should've said something when you called. Even though I do have a child.

You should've called me, you had the whole day.

It still don't matter, I just had a baby. You think I'd be looking at the calendar?

It don't matter.

What you fucking told me.

You make something a priority if you care about it.

I did care.

I could have 10 kids and I would still call you on your birthday.

You the type of person that you can't be trusted. You can't.

You can't.

I just, I couldn't fuck with you.

Why couldn't she be trusted? What happened?

Because she's—

I can be trusted when you need money though.

Yeah, that's the only time. That's the only time when I needed you.

And that was a lot of times. Well.

Why did you call Malie on her birthday?

Because I forgot and I don't look at the calendar.

Okay.

I had just had my baby. And not to mention, you don't even give a fuck about my baby. You didn't, you wasn't there, you didn't call me.

Did you acknowledge the baby, her having a baby?

She tried to be, so I wasn't there for her birth.

You weren't there for the birth? But were you there throughout the pregnancy at all?

No, not physically, but you know, we would talk.

Got it. Well, were you expecting her to be there? Were you?

I didn't have nobody. Just like she said, she ain't had nobody. We could have been together. You my big sister. You supposed to been, but you wasn't.

How old was your baby when you missed her birthday?

She was probably going on 1 years old.

Okay.

Yeah.

Okay. And now your child is 3?

Yes.

And you haven't seen her child?

No.

No.

I didn't acknowledge anybody's birthday.

Just because she, I don't think she can have kids, she don't like nobody else's kids.

I don't have kids because I don't want to have kids.

Yeah. That's so selfish.

It's not selfish at all. It is.

You say you got all the money, why you can't have kids?

Exactly. Because I want that money for me.

That's selfish.

No, it's not. Why would I wanna be stuck with a kid when I don't have to be?

I mean, different choices, you know what I mean? You wanted motherhood, she doesn't. I don't think that's a point of contention here. I don't think that should be anything. Women are allowed to have it the way they want. But I think more so what's concerning for me is the fact that she hasn't seen your child in 3 years.

No.

She haven't called, checked, do nothing. Only thing she good for is the blocks on the corner.

A producer told me this before I walked out here and I'm not sure. Did she wish death on your baby?

She did.

Did she wish death on her baby?

She even paid $10,000 on my baby head and said that I wasn't pregnant.

No, not like that. I said I didn't believe she was pregnant because she has lied about it before.

Yeah, but when I told you and I showed you—

Have you lied about pregnancies before?

I did.

Okay.

Okay.

I did.

Okay, so I just wanna let everybody know that we reached out to their father and he declined and never responded at all. Does he know you two don't get along?

He do.

And does he try to do anything about it?

No.

Ever?

He doesn't have a right to. You don't know me enough to say anything about me. That's not right.

Is he your father?

No, not when he wasn't around, no.

So I gotta tell y'all, I see quickly what's going on here. There are two little girls And there's two mothers that didn't get along that got passed out right to y'all. Am I right? You're getting emotional. What's making you emotional right now?

Because I just wanna be there for my sister, but I just wanna feel appreciated at the same time and recognized.

I get it. And this is what I was gonna keep on saying on this. You two never had a chance to really have the bonds because of their contention. And then as adults, you said, let's try to come back together. Let's try to figure this out. And it took y'all to 2018. And at that point, you've already had your own pain. You've already felt alone on your own. You've already had your own pain, not feeling abandoned, feeling certain things like nobody appreciates me. And then you did what was probably what you learned how to do to show love and affection. I'm gonna show up for you. I'm gonna give you these things. I'm gonna pay this bill. And for you, that was like, If I'm doing that at bare minimum, I need you to just remember the small things for me.

Exactly.

The same way that I'm helping y'all see the other person's side, he should have been there to remind y'all what the other person is feeling. So, you know, before we started this, I read a little bit about what was going on here and I was hoping this would be this way. I asked y'all to write some birthday cards for each other. Do you remember that? You remember that little assignment? Do you remember that little assignment I gave y'all? Y'all don't know why I did that, do you?

I did not. Okay, well girl. It's not her birthday.

Don't worry, don't worry, girl. I'll be right back. I'll be right back. Here you go. Here you go.

Thank you.

Now I know y'all birthdays, 'cause I looked on y'all sheet, are 15 days apart. So you're not that far apart. But now look at this. These are the cards y'all read to each other. I want you, Mally, to read the one she wrote about you. Here, I'll hold this. Read what your sister wrote without you knowing.

Happy belated birthday, sis. I'm sorry I forgot your special day. You're the person I actually look up to and I would love to work it out and get our bond back.

What did she write to you?

Baby sister, happy birthday to the best of the best. Today we celebrate you. Wherever you wanna go, whatever you wanna do, happy birthday from Melody to you.

Thank you, Karamo. So I did this to remind y'all, when y'all in here dealing with this other stuff, y'all both actually want the best for each other and love each other. Now, I know that your sister's hurt. Can you acknowledge that she has done a lot for you and that she just wants a little of you to acknowledge the small things?

What do you wanna say to her?

I mean, you did a lot. You did more than what any other person would've did for me. You my big sister. I always love you. I should have been there for your birthday. And that was my fault.

I'm sorry.

She's acknowledging. Because what's happened right now is there's a lot of pain. But I also want you to understand this because she deserves something too. She's overwhelmed. And she has similar pain to you, different ways, but similar pain. And sometimes when she gets overwhelmed, that's why she comes to you. Because sometimes, even though it's not fair to you as big sister, you have to take on everything. It's not fair. Oh, it ain't fair. Okay? My big sister in the audience right now. It ain't fair, girl. Hey, big sis. But also, you have to remember that she's making mistakes because she's overwhelmed. You figured it out in this area. She's still trying to figure it out.

But what if I'm overwhelmed? Who's gonna be that person to me?

She is. I'm here now. Look what she just said.

I'm here now.

Look what she said.

You don't have to worry no more.

I promise.

That's why, that's why I had her go first so you could hear her say that, "Yes, I know what you've done for me and now I get it that I can be there for you." Mm-hmm.

I accept your apology. Obviously I don't want you to die. That's something that I have to learn how to control, not to try to hurt people with words.

Tell her, not me.

When they hurt me. So I'm sorry too.

But you know what? On the other end, you know what type of sister you got. You my sister. Your words can't hurt me.

Okay.

Your words cannot hurt me. They can only just uplift me.

Good. The thing that hurts y'all is distance because as children, You felt abandonment. And so that's why y'all hurt each other by not talking. And that's what y'all need to stop. That's what y'all need to stop. I don't think outta y'all mouth really hurts each other 'cause both of y'all got the same mouth.

Yeah, she could say the same thing to me. I'd be like, okay girl, no.

Yeah, exactly. But the distance is where y'all know because there's been abandonment there. There's been feeling like no one's showing up for me. When you have those feelings, what you're doing is triggering each other by saying, nah, I'm not there. Right.

Mm-hmm.

Listen, I need y'all to understand, you don't have to wait for each other's birthday to celebrate each other, okay?

You're right.

So what I'm gonna do, now that y'all got y'all balloons and y'all done missed 2 years with each other, which is way too long, girl. I'm gonna go ahead and send y'all to dinner tonight so y'all can have some dinner, right? And reconnect, okay?

Yes, sir.

And next time y'all are feeling overwhelmed, overwhelmed, y'all are forgetting, instead of having distance, I want y'all to come together. Can y'all promise each other that?

Yes, I promise.

Promise her?

Yes, I promise. I promise.

All right, good.

I love you.

I love you.

Y'all gonna be all right. It's gonna work out. Just remember what I said, all right? All right, and then also tell your daddy to get in the middle of this. Dad?

He the one—

Well, actually—

Have your daddy give me a call. We'll figure this out.

Actually, he's not She the one that told me, you know, that's my big sister. Of course I'm gonna always love her.

I got to. But that ain't enough. Y'all keep missing that. That ain't enough. I can say that all day long. Hey, love your big sister. No, no, no. I need you to help me identify what's going on.

Right.

But it's all right. We'll figure that out later. All right, good luck, y'all. Thank you. All right, everyone, make sure to come back next time, friends, so we can keep talking and growing. I love you all.