My Troubled Past Hurt My Kids | KARAMO

Why do you think your girls do not respond to your texts?

'Cause they don't need me.

They don't need you.

When I'm texting them, there's a difference when they texting me.

Okay. My producer told me we have an example of your text so that I can see. So you're reaching out to them saying, "Hey, I need—" A broly text.

That's how sick I was. Like literally, I had pneumonia and COVID. Okay. Influenza A. Yes. Probably had caught it at work, blah, blah, blah. I would say, but there's no way they didn't know I was in that hospital. Got it. Okay? I am very, very well known on Facebook. Somebody seen that text and said, "Hey, I didn't know your mother was in the hospital. Tell her I love her. Woo woo woo." That's bull.

No response.

I'm sorry.

How often do you speak to them?

I reach out damn near every day.

So when was the last time you saw them in person?

It's probably been a couple months, you know?

And it goes like that. Why do you think they're upset with you?

Shay Shay says I didn't teach her anything. I wasn't a good mother. I wasn't there. Cashmere, the other twin, says I calls her. What else she be saying? I'll be saying, oh, I tell her she's not a good mother, which is a damn lie. It is not true.

Got it. Well, we talked to your daughters before this show. Oh, sure you did. In hopes we could get some clarity of the situation. And we wanna take a look at what they have to say. I haven't seen this either.

Okay. Mama, I was in jail for 2 years and I never got a letter from you or a call. Last year I gave birth to my daughter and you missed it, my first daughter. I'm on the phone expecting to see you. Is my mama here yet? She never, you never showed up. You never came.

Mama, my childhood was traumatizing because you called me a fucking hoe for years. You questioned my parenting and you've called CPS on me many times.

Mom, you only call me when you need money or a favor. In middle school, I OD'd on some of your muscle relaxers. You threw pill bottles and told me to kill myself The same day I got out the hospital. And I'll never forget it. Like, I still am confused if it was real or not. We needed you.

We needed you. We needed you. And you weren't there.

And I'm here. I saw you had reactions to almost everything they said. So you feel like a lot of it was lies that— I don't think it's lies.

I think they twisted the shit. OK. OK, it's a lot of twisting. OK. Because I'm real. Okay, now Cashmere, I have, I can't lie. I would not lie. And I ain't gonna lie about nothing I said I do. That's why I asked y'all not to do it. 'Cause one thing for sure and two things for certain, I'm gonna keep it 1,000 with you, okay? Yes, okay? I was a regular parent, didn't come with a handbook. Any of y'all got a handbook to when y'all became a parent? 'Cause if y'all did, can I use it? While y'all wowing and oohing? Real talk, Karamo. I was young, okay? I was in the world for my, I think almost 12 years. I was on drugs, okay? With that being said, ooh and wow, I became clean and sober on my own. Ain't nothing, a blue book, only blue book I picked up was the Bible.

I think it's time that we speak to your daughters and get their point of view on this.

Where my beautiful babies at?

So let's start with Selena. Selena, come on out for me. Come on out, princess. Hi, beautiful. Thank you for being here.

I love you.

How you doing? Hey, I'm good. Thank you for being here. So you said your mom didn't contact you while you were in jail? Did anyone contact you? No.

No. I sent letters home and I said something to my mom, my siblings, and I didn't hear anything back.

Okay. And what made you emotional backstage?

Because she sits on stage and you sit here and you act like you don't know what's going on. I don't, baby.

Mama, just listen. All I ask y'all every time, if it's something I done, if it's something I didn't do, tell me. Selena, this is what you do. You already know I don't, baby. I'm human. Whatever I didn't do, baby, I don't— I cannot change the past. So be nothing. Hold on. All I can do is start fresh. From here.

There's no past, we're starting now. My baby's birthday is January 31st. Last year you did not show up. You were not there for her birth. Hold on.

Let's tell Karamo what you did when you had her. Did you contact me before I went to work? I said call me in case you go— Hold on, pumpkin. I said let me know if you go in labor. I can't talk. I didn't ask you that. She doesn't let you talk. No, did I ask you contact me before if you go in labor?

So I won't go to work? Mama, I was on the phone with you. You did not come. You said you had to work.

You said you had to be at work. I was at work. The only ones that was allowed in the labor and delivery, oh, let's find out, was her mother-in-law and her boyfriend. If you would've came, you would've got in that door.

You said that your mom didn't contact you while she was in jail. Did you contact her while she was in jail?

Can you contact anybody in jail?

Can you write?

Can you contact anybody in jail? Can you read and write? Can you call somebody in jail?

Can you write them?

You can. They have something called JPay where you— JP where you can call.

Stop it, Karamo. You cannot call a jail and talk to nobody. You cannot call a jail and talk to nobody, baby. They do.

They have resources where you can call and write.

I can call the council and the, what's it, like I did because they had her somewhere where I didn't want her at. And I'm gonna say this, okay? I was lied to until my last court date. Of being in that courthouse, about why you was in jail.

This is not my mom.

But y'all lied to me the whole time. I didn't lie to you. So I was upset y'all lied to me.

My mom doesn't talk to me, so she doesn't know what's going on in my life. I graduated high school. I went to medical assistant school and I've never heard, "I'm proud of you." I'm a first-time mom at 27. I'm trying to be on your side.

No. 'Cause see, right now it look like you put your head—

This is some real stuff. This is how I feel with you. Mama, that does not matter. It doesn't matter. You have to show a person that you love them. That's true.

I got that. I got that.

Selena, from your opinion, do you feel like your mother was there for you as a child?

No, she was gone. We had a lot of people in our house, so we had people there. She was at bingo.

Your mom was at bingo? She was at bingo. How often was your mom at bingo?

Bingo, it's not on Monday, so it's Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, 7:45 to 10. Then 12 to 3:45. On Wednesdays and Fridays? Exactly, and Sundays. So that's majority of the week.

I'm gonna fly that shit as many kids I got. I don't give a damn what nobody say. Okay. Okay, yes I did. Okay, there's two parents in the household. Okay, I need help. So my help was going to bingo.

Okay. What responsibilities did you take on as a parent?

None. Mommy, you better not say it.

None. I helped cook. You taught me a lot about cooking. I knew how to cut veggies. Oh, I taught you how to cook? Yes, you taught me a lot. You did, I heard you cooked. But I washed the clothes, I got everybody up for school. You're supposed to.

You're supposed to. That's what big siblings do. I don't care nothing about what you got to say, who at. But if I can get some help, if I say, "Selena, get your sister up," I do, do, do, come on now. Y'all come on with that. Stop with this.

Mama, I just wanna say—

Top fashion show. Let me just say— What's the other shit? Gramma Insta. We are here in flash, in real reality. I love you. I cannot love you no more than I love you.

Then you should listen.

I listen, but I'mma give y'all that. I'mma give y'all that. I'mma give y'all that. Don't clap no more, please. Listen. I love you, baby. You have always been that special child that needed the most attention out of all 13 of us.

I didn't get none, and I didn't get none.

Selena, stop it. Only thing that you didn't get was the financial that you like and that you was getting from your dad.

It has nothing to do with money. No, it doesn't. I've never asked you for nothing. I don't ask you for nothing financially. I asked for you to be there for me.

Tell me where am I, well how am I not there, baby?

You didn't come when I was in jail. I wanted you to visit me.

I'm not coming to jail because I asked you.

The foolishness that happened didn't have to happen. It wasn't foolishness.

Now clap on that. Now you wanna be a movie star? You know I ain't going to jail for nobody. Did I ever go to jail for 'em? I'm being honest. What do I look like?

That's bull. Mama, you are arguing with them. You did some things that you shouldn't have done.

Everyone, I want to bring out your other daughter. Everyone, welcome Kajma to the show.

Hi, baby. Hey. You came out here to act a fool too? Mm-hmm. Because I'm going to react a fool with y'all. Y'all want to be a movie star? Y'all going to be a star today. Come on with me. Love these kids so much, Karamo. Baby, I jump off top your roof.

I'm telling you.

What do you think of what you've heard so far? Like, I feel like that relationship, I just, like, she didn't get the chance to build a relationship 'cause she had so many kids. I feel like that about that relationship. And then, you know, she had a daddy that spoiled her and he told her things about my mom that, you know, some things are true, but some things you don't tell a child about their mother. You feel me? To where she been a vendetta against my mama to where, yeah, that's why I don't think—

Can I get a hand clap?

Yeah, but it's still, I just backed away.

I just separated myself.

More things that, you know, I don't know, like things that she did with my other siblings, she didn't put on any respect. Can I ask you a question?

You did say in this tape that your mother called you the R word. How did that affect you?

Made me feel really like low self-esteem, made me feel lower than everybody. 'Til I had a daughter at 16, that's what made me step outta my shell and stuff like that and let me, you know, like still have, what is it called? Calm down, baby, relax. Social anxiety and social awkwardness and stuff like that. Yes. Relax. So I'm still trying to find myself from all of that.

Like I've been through a lot. And you told my producer that your mom threatens to take your kids away from you? Yes.

Like she had—

I'm gonna talk to whoever's in the chat I got if I catch them, catch someone.

When I had my child at 16, I'll tell you, she had been threatening me from on and on. So anytime CPS comes and stuff like that, I would think it's my mama and stuff like that. Like I have a trust problem with my mama because of things she say.

I'm standing 10 toes down. If I feel like there's something going on with her child, her child, my other kids' child. Like she push you? Yes, ma'am.

Like I grew up in the ECE, I was in ECE classes and stuff like that. So like I have a problem controlling my emotions. So she could push me onto going off and stuff like that. No, she's not.

We all have a problem, baby.

You just never seen it. You never seen it.

She do though, like we all do because—

We all have it the same.

My mama never did any drugs around us or nothing like that, but she was on drugs with us pregnant, so it causes her to have emotional problems.

I'm gonna go ahead and take a break really quickly. We don't need no break, but listen. Yeah, we do, 'cause I'm the host of the show and that's what I say.

We're gonna take a break real quick and we'll be right back.

There's one more person we have to meet here, so everyone please welcome your other daughter, Shay, to the show.

Shay. She'll drive me crazy, Karamo. You think I'm playing? I ain't. I love you. I love you more, baby.

Shay, how do you feel about what you just heard?

Well, I feel pretty good. I just feel like y'all should slow down and listen to each other talk, 'cause we definitely did not write Selena while she was in jail. And we didn't go up to the hospital and then So you're confirming you think that the things that she's saying actually are true?

Mm-hmm. Okay, so all of you feel like you didn't give her the support that you had to.

I also feel like what my mom said is true too.

She did, I feel like my mom actually did her best and we don't really know how she was raised. She doesn't really talk about her childhood. So we should all just be like a little bit more understanding.

Y'all wanna know my childhood?

No, can I say one thing? And slow down and hear each other out. I definitely understand where you coming from 'Cause I remember those conversations that Daddy had with me in the car when I was a little girl.

I don't wanna talk about your daddy.

I know, but I'm saying that basically, I know how you feel.

So you don't wanna hear me about your daddy.

I know how you feel. I see. Like, I'm a first-time mom and I have, I'm in a situation to where I'm not married, so.

This is what I feel like about their relationship. Her daddy, like whatever she got against her daddy, that's what she has against her because she listens to her daddy. She, you know, it's Daddy's girl.

That's what hurts. Because I never told what Daddy did. I never told why Cherry was out there so long or how Cherry was on drugs, you know? But I'm so tired of hearing about what Daddy said. I gotta be real.

I don't, and this is very rare for me, I don't know how to help you all. Yes, sir. I don't know how to help you all. I see confusion, I see negative traits, I see positive traits, I see manipulation, I see so much different things that I have no clarity of a baseline of where to start to help you all to get to a first step.

I just want help in bringing them closer to me. What is it that I can do?

But she is slowly getting better and I feel like I need you now.

Let me know. If we're slowing down.

I get it. I understand. Yeah, but see, the thing is what I do on this show is like, this is never for TV. I try to keep it real. I try to let y'all know when I can help, when I can't. Again, like y'all are telling me she's better and so I can't, and then you shake your head no, I don't. She's getting better.

We're not saying she's better. She's slowly—

How is she getting better when— She said she's slowly getting better.

I will tell you that I do think one thing that as a mother you can work on is a little bit more vulnerability. I see your strength. I see that you've used your strength to protect yourself for a very long time, but the strength can come off dismissive or rude. And so I would encourage you, you don't need to apologize to me. I appreciate it, but no need to me. I would tell you for your daughter's sake to be able to talk to them. I think there's a piece that if you all spend time thinking about, and probably where we should have started this conversation is when you said you go to bingo all nights and you gave me the amount of dates and you use bingo as an escape. I think that's the starting point for you all. I do.

From addiction, having one addiction Which is drugs. And then she switched it to bingo.

[Speaker:KARAMO] That's where y'all's issues start and are stemming from, along other things. But it's from behavior of what the addiction and removing herself did to you all. If you all can get on one accord about that, then maybe y'all can have a conversation with your mother where she'll understand you all. So I wish you the best of luck. I wish you the best of luck. And friends, stay with us. We'll be right back.